64: Love Your Business Again: How to Reignite Creativity, Pleasure, and Intuition

Feeling disconnected from your business? Here’s how to fall in love with your business again. In this episode, I’m breaking down five practical ways to reconnect with your work, get clear on what’s draining you, and start reclaiming your time, energy, and joy.

Your business can’t feel alive if you don’t feel alive. When you’re constantly in your head, pushing to keep up and either constantly creating content or binging other’s content, you disconnect from your body’s wisdom. And that means you stop being able to tune into your own inner guidance.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode

• How outsourcing your authority puts your creativity on ice
• The power of identifying what’s actually not working
• Why honoring your body’s rhythm is the ultimate business strategy

Key Takeaways

• Being magnetic in business starts with being resourced and feeling nourished
• You’re allowed to stop following advice that doesn’t work for you
• If it's not bringing joy or results, it’s probably time to let it go

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📌Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, medical advice or business coaching.

Transcript

Tertia [00:00:00]:
I've been seeing so many posts on threads about women feeling demotivated, women feeling defeated, not enjoying their businesses anymore, and feeling just done with it all. I think that if you have been in the online business space for any amount of time, this is a feeling that you will relate to. I know that there was a time in my own business where I felt completely disconnected. And not because I didn't love the work. I loved the work, but I didn't like how I was doing it. So if this is you right now, if your business feels heavy, if you feel like the spark is gone, you don't feel that sense of aliveness and joy anymore, this episode is for you. I'm going to share with you why this happens and how to fall in love with your business again. Welcome to Beyond Burnout for Driven Women. I hi, I'm Tertia and this is where we go from burnout to abundance and we take your nervous system along for the ride. If you are doing all of the right things but you're still not seeing the results, you are in the right place. Here we explore embodiment nervous system work and how to be magnetic in business without going into overdrive or burning yourself out. Let's dive in. In my experience, what makes falling out of love with your business really challenging is that it doesn't happen overnight. You don't wake up one morning and go, oh, I don't like what I've created. It's something that slowly creeps in and it's built up out of all of these little resentments and all of the little boundary violations and all of the overworking late hours and all of the frustrations that pack up. And I almost see it as like when beaver build a dam, how they take all of their little twigs and branches and sticks and mud and leaves to block the rivers or the streams so that they can build their little dam. They stop the water from flowing. That's kind of what happens when we experience all of these boundary violations and all of the resentments and the frustrations and the long hours with low results in return. It's like we blocking our own life force energy. And the difference of course is this helps the little beaver. But if we are doing that, if we have frustration building up inside of us and it blocks our own life force energy from flowing freely. That's not very helpful. And that can cause our business to start feeling heavy. It takes our joy and our pleasure and our passion and our sense of aliveness. It steals that away from us. And the thing is Sometimes it's not the whole business that's the problem. And that was my experience. I loved my business. I still love my business. I love the work that I do. I love the transformation that I offer women, the coming home to self, the aliveness that happens when we connect with our own deep truth. And I love facilitating that for other women. But what I didn't love about my business and what caused me to feel disconnected is the way in which I was doing it. I had decided to use YouTube as my main marketing channel. And in the beginning, I really loved making these YouTube videos. And then what happened is, as my business started growing, as I wanted to scale and reach more people, I started following the advice of experts, and I'll put that expert in quotation marks, because I believe that ultimately we are the own experts of our own life. And I had lost sight of that. And that's okay. It was an experience that I went through. And now, hopefully, I don't need to do that again. So what happened was I was chasing all of these keywords. I was doing all of these SEO things. I got really good at SEO. And yes, it worked. I started ranking. But the problem was that I attracted the wrong woman to my work, meaning that the outcomes that they wanted wasn't necessarily something that I could say, support them with. And that was a clear misalignment between the message that I had in my marketing and what my work was actually about. So I was doing a lot of work, I was putting in a lot of effort, but I wasn't getting the clients that I wanted in return. I actually ended up feeling like a content creator instead of a coach, because I was basically content creating more than what I was coaching. And the downside, what it really cost me, was I became so irritable, I became so stressed out. And I would work over weekends. I would work when my family was at home, when the kids came home from school. Instead of being ready to spend some time with them and helping them with their homework and doing all the football runs, what happened was I was so irritable and I was so stressed out. And of course, when this carries on for long enough, we reach a breaking point. We reach a point where we say, is this even worth it? So I had to make a hard stop. And I made that hard stop last year in 2024, I made that hard stop. And I said, okay, this is it. I need to find my way back to myself. I had to get really, really honest with myself. And that was that. I was practicing embodiment in my personal life, right? It had really transformed my life. It had transformed my relationship with my husband, the level of intimacy that we have in our relationship. It transformed the relationship with my kids and how I engaged with them. And yet my business, I ran my business still from the head up, right? So in my personal life, I was living, embodied, and following the guidance of my body, the wisdom of my body, and following my own aliveness and letting that lead me, letting that be my truth. But in my business, I still didn't do that. And what happened is that started flowing into my personal life. Then, because you can't keep them separate, the way that you show up in business is going to flow out into your personal life. It has to. So for me, my truth is I had to find a way where I could honor the same values that I have in my personal life and do that in my business as well, because that didn't happen. So I'd love to share with you five lessons that I have learned through this. And my intention with this is if you find yourself in a space where you are also feeling disconnected, where you are feeling demotivated, that what I'm going to share with you now, these five points are going to offer you a new perspective and it's going to give you the support that you need in order to start changing things in your business so that you can get back to your spark and your sense of aliveness. The first thing is to get really specific about what's not working. And this is something that, that I have learned as a coach is in order to be a good coach and to really support my clients, I have to be really specific, right? And the thing is, when we feel like we are not enjoying our businesses anymore, we're wondering if it's even worth it if the results that you get don't match your output. It's very easy to think that everything is wrong, right? It's the whole business, the whole setup, the whole everything sucks. And that's why it's so important to get clear about what is not working. What part exactly is it that you don't love? Is it the structure? Is it the content? Is it the marketing method that you're using? For example, like I used YouTube, is it the way that you run through your week? Is it your systems that you have? Is it the message? Is it the problem that you're solving? Is it the modality that you're using? It's important for us to get very, very clear about what are these things, because once you know specifically this is what I love. This is what doesn't work for me. It's easier to start making changes. It's also not so overwhelming feeling that we need to redesign the whole ship, right? There might only be a very small thing that needs to change. This is how we begin to start finding our way back. The second thing is to automate what you can and to follow your rhythm. Now, this might be different to what you hear from typical business advice, which says as soon as you can outsource the things that you don't like, and yes, you could, but honestly, if you are in a stage of your business where you are not making any profit and you can't pay yourself because all your money is going to contractors or VAs, of course you're going to start feeling resentful. That's not sustainable. So here's what I found more helpful and that is to automate what you can. We have many, many, many tools available online that can help you automate some of those things, like scheduling emails, scheduling posts. You can even use AI like I do to transcribe my podcast, to write my show notes, to create the outline for my blog that I just filled in. So automate what you can and design your week around your natural rhythm. So we all have our own natural rhythms. For example, I'm a morning person. I'm very creative in the mornings. I'm very strong and powerful and motivated from the moment that I wake up. And then when it's after lunchtime, I start going down. So in the mornings is when I usually record my podcast because my energy is high and I also want to transmit that energy to you. And in the afternoons, I'm really good at working on step by step methodical things, spreadsheets, admin, that kind of thing. So that's how I work. You may be the other way around, where you take a while to warm up and to wake up. I know my husband is like that, so he takes a while to kind of wake up, but he can just go on forever into the night. And if that is you, how can you allow for that rhythm to be honored in the way that you create content or set up your client sessions? Now, I do have a general loose framework that I use and that is that on Mondays and Tuesdays I usually reserve that for my content creation. And then Wednesdays and Thursdays are my client facing day. So those are the days that I get onto Zoom. And it doesn't look the same every week though, because I also follow my menstrual cycle in this. So it's all of these layers, one on top of each other. And typically when I'm menstruating, I'm not going to record podcast episodes because my energy for that is just not there. And when I'm ovulating, that's when I'm really on fire. So I have a structure and a system in place so that my creativity can free up and I honor my rhythm through that. And why I believe this is so important is now I am the one who decides when I'm doing what. And I'm not being described by the algorithm or by the content creation gurus. And I'm putting that in quotation marks again about how you should actually do this. I'm following my own sovereign expertise and guidance. The third thing that I've learned is to simplify. And that's actually my word for this year. And what I noticed, and you might experience the same is once I started following my own rhythm, simplification almost happens as a result of that. And it's also still important to ask yourself, what are you doing right now that's not bringing you joy or results? Right. Sometimes there are things in our businesses that we need to do that we don't enjoy. But if you are doing something that's not bringing you joy and it's not bringing you results, then why are you doing it? Our hyper masculine world has trained us so well to operate from the head up, all right? And what happens is our attention is always pointed outwards and away from ourselves when we are in the habit, because it is a habit of, of operating from the head up. So you disconnected from your intuition when that happens, you disconnected from your inner wisdom and you're disconnected from your desires, right? We don't even know what we want anymore. And what I often see happen is, you know that practice when they say, if you could design your day in any way, how would you design your day? If it wasn't about making any money, what would be the things that you would do if. If we do this from the head up, we could potentially be answering from our limiting beliefs. We could be answering from what we think we should say, and we could be answering from our fears where instead, when we learn how to drop into our bodies and connect with our desires, our true desires, and not those things that we think we should want. We might give different answers. If we live from the head up only we can so easily outsource our own authority, right? We follow the lead of others and we do what they say we should do. And we follow their advice instead of trusting ourselves, instead of trusting our own path. And that's exactly what happened to me when I went on this kick to do the high hitting keywords and SEO, which ultimately led me further and further away from my truth. So simplify is number three. Simplify. Stop doing those things that don't give you joy or results and get clear on what it is that you really, really want that is going to help you simplify. Number four on my list is to check your boundaries. And here I'm speaking to external and internal boundaries. So boundaries to me are those things that we are available for or not available for. If we are not clear, if we don't embody our boundaries, if we are not solid in what we are available for and not available for, what happens is our boundaries fluctuate. So we swing between having very rigid boundaries where we put our foot down and we say no more of this. And then we can easily start feeling guilty. We feel like we're failing others, like we're disappointing them. And then we veer over to the other side where we overcompensate by having no boundaries in place. And this is a very exhausting and frustrating place to be in. So here's a question for you. Where are you saying yes or giving in or allowing? And then it causes resentment, it causes frustration, it causes you drawing the line in the sand and it causes exhaustion. That's an example of an external boundary violation. This is the agreements that we have with people outside of ourselves, but we also have internal boundaries. And more often than not, our internal boundaries can be so easily overridden, especially if you're a driven woman, especially if you're a high achiever. You, it is very easy for us to break those agreements that we have with ourselves. But here's the thing. If you keep on overriding yourself, it's like you break your word to yourself. You keep on breaking the promises that you have in place with yourself. And this could be because you're pushing yourself too hard. It could be because you said that you're gonna take it slow and you're going to practice more self care. And then you just forget that you even had that agreement with yourself in place. And you just go at 120 miles a second again, whatever that looks like for you. The problem is every time that we break the agreement with ourselves, it's like we are punching holes into our own power bucket. So the way that I see it, it's like your personal power is contained in a bucket. And whenever you are breaking the agreements with yourself. Whenever you go against your own word within yourself, you're punching hole in this bucket. And your life force, your creativity, your passion, your aliveness, it actually leaks out through the holes in the bucket. So it follows that the more you can honor your own truth and your own knowing and not override yourself, the less holes you are going to punch in your own personal power bucket. And then the final point is to bring pleasure back into your day. If your day consists of spending all of your time behind a screen, either creating content or binging on other people's content, or being on Zoom calls, you are also spending most of your time in your head, right? Most of your energy is in your head, and it's directed outwards and away from you. And what happens is, if we do this for too long, too often, if we in the habit of having our attention directed away from ourselves, away from our body, what happens is our bodies go offline. We start feeling dead below the neck. Now, pleasure is not something that happens in our minds. Pleasure happens in the body. So your body has to be online to experience pleasure. And even more importantly, you. You have to be inside your body, right? You have to be inside yourself in order to feel your body so that you can experience pleasure and so that you can experience joy. And since we are so well trained in living mostly in our minds, we need to bring our pleasure back online too. And that looks like doing enjoyable things, pleasurable things, things that make you feel sensually alive. And you can do this in the smallest of ways. Let's say, for example, you have a big task that you need to do. And perhaps you want to do the task, perhaps you don't want to do the task, but it's a big task that's in your day. What can work really, really well is if you do something pleasurable right before the task. And that can look like having a cup of tea or going for a quick walk or reading a chapter in a book. Then you tackle the task. And once that task is complete, you do something pleasurable again. So you can go and walk again, or you can go and have a glass of lemon water or whatever your joy is. You can sniff some aromatherapy oils or give yourself a foot massage. Those are really good, by the way. This is going to support your nervous system. But even more than that, it builds your capacity to experience pleasure. It. It activates your sensual aliveness. It resources you and you feel more nourished in your day. This is what makes you feel alive. This is what brings the joy and the pleasure back. And not only that, it creates safety in your nervous system, right? When we feel resourced, when we feel nourished, we also feel safe. And when we feel safe in ourselves, we have more access to creativity and intuition, right? It's very, very difficult for you to access your intuition or your creativity if you are in survival mode. And when we feel like we've fallen out of love with our business, when we don't like our business model, when we experience lots of boundary violations, that puts us into survival mode. There's very little access to creativity and intuition from there. So these are the five things that I have brought into my business and I have seen the difference, I'm feeling the difference. And if you are going, oh my goodness, you're inside my head, this is me. I'm calling in a one on one client to work with me over the next three months. And if you are tired of second guessing yourself, if you are tired of leaking your energy through that power bucket that you inadvertently keep on punching holes in, or if you are tired of outsourcing your authority and your expertise to someone outside of yourself, then I invite you to hop onto a free embodied exploration call with me. It's not a sales call, it's a call for you and me to discuss what's going on. I'm going to offer you some support and suggestions and only then if it feels right for you, we can talk about what working together would look like. I'm going to put the link to book that free embodied exploration call in the show notes for you and then I'm going to wrap us up with a few announcements. The first is that I'm taking a short break for the next two weeks. So I'll be back here last week of July. Well, depending on when you're listening to this episode, but the date is the last week of July. I'll be back here again and if you are not on my newsletter, make sure that you are signed up because this is how you can get all of the behind the scenes information. And you'll also hear when I open up new things and come find me on Threads. I'm loving Threads. It is a social media platform that works with my Simplify word for this year and I would love to connect with you there. And then the last announcement that I have is that in August I'm launching my group program again. I'm going to be sharing all of the juicy details around that soon. And while we are in this, the beautiful summer energy up here in the Northern hemisphere and my own magnetic energy that I'm sitting in right now. I'm also calling in six woman for that group program. The reason why I'm limiting it to six is because I love these smaller containers where I get to work intimately with you and we go really deep. So if that's calling to you, make double sure that you are on my email list or you can even send me a dm. And again, all of those links down in the show notes. I'm so happy that you tuned in today, and I'd so appreciate you to leave a rating if you are listening on Spotify or if you're listening on Apple Podcast, a rating and a review about your takeaway in this episode or any of the other episodes that you have listened to. Have a lovely two weeks and I will speak to you soon. Bye.