How We Met.

In this special episode of The FIT LIKE KRYS Podcast, Krys is joined by her partner, Levent, to share their journey of meeting through online dating. As February is the month of love, they discuss the ups and downs of dating apps, how their relationship developed, and what it takes to find a meaningful connection. They reflect on the challenges of modern dating, lessons learned along the way, and what makes a relationship truly work. Plus, they introduce the next episode, which will focus on healthy relationship habits.

Key Topics and Takeaways

Online Dating Realities

• Levent shares his experience of being on and off dating apps over the years.
• Krys talks about her FLK Method Love Toned challenge and how it helped her approach dating intentionally.
• The different strategies people use with dating apps, from paying for premium to swiping on everyone.

How We Met

• The story of their first date and why Krys was mentally checked out from dating.
• How Levent’s direct answer about wanting a “partner” caught Krys off guard.
• The role of patience and persistence in building their connection.
• Why Levent refused to kiss Krys for several dates, leading to confusion and laughter.

Dating Advice and Red Flags

• The importance of knowing yourself before seeking a relationship.
• How to recognize when someone is showing up for you in a meaningful way.
• Why actions speak louder than words when it comes to finding the right partner.
• Red flags to watch for, including assumptions people make when dating.

An Unforgettable Jersey City Date Night

• Running through the rain looking for their car after a dinner date.
• The little moments that revealed they had a real connection.
• How humor and shared laughter became a big part of their relationship.

Levent’s Advice for Women Dating Online

• Be clear about what you want in a partner and do not settle.
• Pay attention to consistency and effort, not just words.
• Know that happiness is a choice, and both partners should bring positivity into the relationship.

Next Episode Teaser: Healthy Relationship Habits

In the next episode, Krys and Levent will discuss healthy relationship habits, what helps a partnership thrive, and how to maintain connection through life’s ups and downs.

Stay Konnected

Website: fitlikekrys.com
Email: info@fitlikekrys.com
Follow and Subscribe: Don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe to the podcast.

This episode is full of insights for anyone navigating the dating world or looking to build a strong relationship. Thanks for listening, and see you next time.

Transcript

Krys [0:00 - 0:18]: Foreign. Welcome back to the Fit Like Krys podcast. Thank you so much for listening ahead of time. This is a really special episode because I am joined by my favorite person in the whole world. 

Levent [0:18 - 0:19]: That's me, right? 

Krys [0:19 - 0:20]: That is you. 

Levent [0:20 - 0:23]: Because the dogs are here. I just want to make sure we talk about me. 

Krys [0:23 - 0:38]: The dogs are here. We are having a little bit of doggy difficulty, so all the dogs are just roaming. If you see one jump up or bark or anything, they're just part of the. Part of today's episode. Hi. 

Levent [0:38 - 0:39]: Hi. 

Krys [0:39 - 0:53]: So I want to. Since we're in the month of love this month, I wanted to have a couple special episodes with you. Specifically. We've known each other for almost a year. 

Levent [0:53 - 0:54]: Almost. 

Krys [0:54 - 0:59]: Almost a year. And I've learned so much from you in the past year. 

Levent [0:59 - 0:59]: Okay. 

Krys [1:00 - 1:33]: And so much about myself. So wanted to share a little bit with people to help and inspire them. But before we get into that episode, this episode, I thought it'd be cool to share how we met and maybe what our life was like right before we met and how online dating. He makes a lot of faces. So if you're watching this sometimes, I'll be. I don't play poker sometimes. What did you say to me yesterday? Oh, you said to give you a Xanax. Oh, yes. 

Levent [1:33 - 1:35]: My face is. Yeah. 

Krys [1:36 - 1:39]: But he doesn't mean half of his facial expressions. 

Levent [1:41 - 1:42]: Okay. 

Krys [1:42 - 2:43]: All right. So we are going into how we met, and I told you a little bit about how we met in the background of that, which was a challenge that I did on FLK Method or with FLK Method. It's called Love Toned. We're going into our third annual challenge right now, and because I am thankfully taken, I have two of my members kind of passing the torch to them. But I would not have met you if it wasn't for this process. So I wanted to talk a little bit about that first. But before I talk, we're going to give the microphone to you because I want to hear what you have to say. So before we met, how. How long were you on dating apps? First of all, which dating apps were you on? And give us just, like, some insight into dating apps in Levent. This is Levent, by the way. I didn't even say his name. Welcome, Levent. 

Levent [2:43 - 3:44]: Thank you for having me. If I had a choice, honestly, I don't. I don't remember when I first joined the dating app world. I've been divorced for 10 years, so. And I know for the first couple of years, I was not on the dating apps. I was not Looking to date. But in the last couple of years I have been on and off dating apps and it's always a love hate relationship like that, that as you get older, that whole process of telling your story. And I would joke that I, I just wanted to create a word document and I'd be like, here's me. Please reveal if you like what you see, we can progress. But that, that meeting the person and you know, going through that process is just. And so, so you go through this process. 

Krys [3:44 - 3:53]: Wait, what's your least favorite question that you would get asked on a date? Like when someone asks you for talk, what would. What was like, something that you were like. 

Levent [3:57 - 5:34]: Why I got divorced? Do I still talk to my ex? What kind of relationship do I have with my kids? Never, never got into like anything uncomfortable like politics or religion or, you know, things of that nature. I think, I think to some extent, by the time you meet the person, a lot of that stuff gets weeded out, you know, as a part of the selection process. I know as a man, like I, I took the stance of being sort of more conservative. I would, I would put myself out there and then let the woman decide if they wanted to meet up in person. And because there's a whole spectrum of, you know, certain women were like, I don't wanna, I don't want a texting buddy. That was a very common text in, in. I recall in, in the text of the description of what people were looking for, like make plans, let's go out and that kind of a thing. And then there's certain women were very conservative. They're like, you know, they, they want to, you know, I don't know if it had to do with my unique name or, you know, I would put that I was multilingual. So I think people made certain assumptions and they would want to sort of filter it out. So you would go through this process, you get your hopes up and then it wouldn't go anywhere. Or, and again, like I, from what I understand, there is varying approaches. Some people pay for premium. 

Krys [5:35 - 5:35]: Yes. 

Levent [5:36 - 5:53]: See, I didn't. I, you know, I only got like, I don't know, five likes a day or ten likes a day, some nominal amount. And then, you know, you only got to select certain criteria. Distance, age group, you know, things of that nature. And I was very selective. 

Krys [5:54 - 5:56]: Oh yeah. 

Levent [5:57 - 6:11]: In who, who I sort of swiped right on. But I know, I know other people pay for the premium and they would write on everything. You know, just play the numbers game in hoping that, you know, something would happen. 

Krys [6:13 - 6:16]: And it did. Listen, there are infinite ways to get to the same place. 

Levent [6:16 - 6:18]: Yes. Yeah, yeah. 

Krys [6:18 - 6:18]: And you're here. 

Levent [6:19 - 6:19]: Yeah. 

Krys [6:19 - 6:22]: So, all right, so love, hate, on and off. 

Levent [6:22 - 6:26]: So I would, I would, I would go through that process and I'd be like, okay, I'm done. I would delete it. 

Krys [6:26 - 6:27]: Okay. 

Levent [6:27 - 6:54]: And then, and then, you know, weeks, months would go by and then you're like, all right, fine, let's, let's try this again. And what's interesting is, is the same people would show up. You know, you're like, oh my God, you're still on here. And I'm sure they were saying the same thing about me. And I saw a stand up comedian the other day on one of the social media platforms and they said they should have a new dating app where they combine everyone and call it what's Left. 

Krys [6:55 - 6:55]: Yeah. 

Levent [6:55 - 7:48]: And I was like, okay, that makes sense. So, yeah. And I think part of it also had to do with, like, yourself. I didn't interact with a lot of people. You know, it wasn't like my old days where I, you know, work, worked in the city where you would run into people on the train, you know, in the office, going out for drinks afterward and things like that. You know, me owning my own business, that being E commerce, catering to. Mostly I didn't interact, so I would meet people at the gym, which was very limited, you know, 45 minutes a day. And outside of that, I mean, literally days could go by where I didn't interact with anyone. So I think that's why online dating is an option. 

Krys [7:48 - 8:42]: Yeah. I also was on and off of it. I was probably only on and off of it when I met you. That was probably only my second. No, no. Trying to think of the year that was probably my third or fourth time being on apps period. Because I was never on a dating app before 2022. So when I got on the dating apps, I was like, oh, this is new. This is a new way to meet people. And it was really overwhelming. I felt it, like, really consuming because it was almost like Instagram where they bait you and they like, oh, yeah, make you do things. And I'm like. And then it would just like you said, I would just be like, oh, what is this? And I'm. 

Levent [8:42 - 8:53]: Which ones were you on? I know you asked me. I was on Hinge. I was mostly on Hinge Bumble for a little bit. Tinder for maybe a day or two. Because that was just craziness. 

Krys [8:53 - 8:55]: Wild and crazy kids on Tinder. 

Levent [8:55 - 9:13]: Yeah, it was just. I just. That didn't work the. There was one called like, Coffee and a Bagel or something that sounds funny. I. I forget the name of, like, the whole premise being that you just meet up for. And how do I. I think those were the only ones. 

Krys [9:13 - 10:07]: I was just on Hinge and Bumble. And I paid for both. I paid for both on my second time. On my second time around. Mostly because I was holding myself accountable in my challenge at FLK Method, my online wellness community called Love Toned. So the. The way essentially that it worked was that instead of just, you know, planning to date people and then being home and working from home and not having any re. Like, I didn't have any. Like, I didn't really even feel like dating. Like, I felt like whatever. I was fine, but I was busy. Like, it didn't really. But I. I knew that I didn't want to be alone. Like, I knew that I wanted to be in a partnership. 

Levent [10:07 - 11:06]: That's a really good point because, you know, having been single on and off for 10 years, what you're looking for changes? Yeah, like, you know, not to get too specific, but, like, post divorce for me was I just wanted time to myself. I had other priorities, my kids, work to focus on. And then when I thought I was ready, it was not for a serious relationship. It was to meet people, go out, have fun, maybe someone to travel with, you know, things of that nature. As I. As the years progressed, things changed. And I told you this on, I think one of our first dates, when you said, what are you looking for? I said, I want a partner. You know, I mean, that's been a theme, a conversation that we've often spoken about. So, you know, to your point, depending on where you are in your relationship cycle, the platforms serve different, you know, different purposes. 

Krys [11:06 - 12:18]: Yeah, I actually tell that I tell our first date story a lot. And the way that I tell it or the way that I remember it is that you were my 40th date or so around there. And I was in the middle of moving from, you know, like, still, you know, finishing up a divorce, moving from just like a huge house to like a, you know, what I live in now, which is an amazing townhouse condo. And I was turning 40, so there was just like a lot going on, still running my business. I was tired and I was going on all of these dates. This is in the course of like 45 days. So between, you know, February 1st and. No, we. I started earlier than that, between the last week of January. So it wasn't even. It was probably 30 days, 30 days I was going, coffee, getting a drink, dinner, second dinner. Like, I was getting the numbers in there. 

Levent [12:19 - 12:20]: Great. 

Krys [12:20 - 12:38]: Yep. Checking it off. And so by the time I went out on the date with you, which was my last date, I did not go on any dates after that, just so you know. It was my last date. And we met up at a pizza. 

Levent [12:38 - 12:41]: Place near you, like, two doors down. 

Krys [12:41 - 12:45]: And you said you were surprised that I went to. 

Levent [12:45 - 13:08]: Yeah, because my experience has been that most people would want to meet at a neutral location and not for a meal. The most common date for me was. Which I was okay with, was, let's go for a walk, grab a cup of coffee. Because it's like, there could be an end. It's. It's an easy exit. You're stuck having a meal long term with someone. 

Krys [13:08 - 13:11]: I wish I got that advice before my experiment. 

Levent [13:11 - 13:11]: Yeah. 

Krys [13:11 - 13:13]: Yeah. Because I had a lot of meals that were super awkward. 

Levent [13:13 - 13:14]: Yeah. So. 

Krys [13:15 - 13:15]: Yeah. 

Levent [13:17 - 13:18]: Yeah. 

Krys [13:18 - 13:34]: So we're sitting down. I. I go to him. It's literally, like, right where he lives. And we meet, and I think within, like, the first five minutes. You made fun of my car or something. You said, my. It's. My tires needed air when you pulled up. Yeah. 

Levent [13:34 - 13:35]: Yeah. 

Krys [13:35 - 13:42]: You're like, your tires need air. I'm like, I'm gonna go home. Okay, bye. 

Levent [13:43 - 13:52]: But now you know that. That. Now that you know me better. It was a. It was coming from a place of concern, not judgment. Yeah. 

Krys [13:53 - 13:56]: Yes. You tell me. My tire. Yes. You're very concerned. 

Levent [13:56 - 13:57]: Yeah. 

Krys [13:57 - 14:00]: You're a concerned person. Yes, I do appreciate that. 

Levent [14:00 - 14:02]: Everyone go home and check your tire pressure. 

Krys [14:02 - 14:06]: Yeah. Very detail oriented, this one. Pros and cons. 

Levent [14:06 - 14:06]: Yeah. 

Krys [14:06 - 14:17]: So we meet at the pizza place, and I'm in just workout clothes. I have, like, workout pants, hat. You know, I look presentable, but I'm definitely. 

Levent [14:17 - 14:20]: Did we not go into town and get coffee first? 

Krys [14:20 - 14:29]: No, that was pizza. No, that was our. That I think we went after. I think we. We elongated the date. We. Okay. 

Levent [14:29 - 14:30]: Yeah, yeah, yeah. 

Krys [14:30 - 14:31]: We were having a good time. 

Levent [14:31 - 14:32]: Yeah. Yeah. 

Krys [14:32 - 14:35]: Then went to get coffee after. And then you walked me to my car. 

Levent [14:35 - 14:35]: Yeah. 

Krys [14:35 - 15:56]: So we go to get pizza, and we go sit into the place, and I'm like, mentally sort of checked out, tired. And I. I remember. This is how I remember it. I remember. I'm gonna take my secrets off. I was sitting at the table, like, just like, no Fs. Given. I was just like, might have well been like this. I was like, you know, like, that's immensely in my brain. I was just kind of like, there. And I. He asked me, you know, we were talking. We had some, like, basic conversation, but then he asked me, what do you want off? He asked me, what are you looking for? And I said, I'm open to anything, you know, like, whatever life brings me. And I was just very, like, not specific about the answer. And I was like, what are you looking for? And he's like a partner. And I was like. In my head, I was like, oh, my God, So scary. Because that's. I was just not even. Even though that's what I wanted. Like, I didn't know that and. Or I wasn't ready for that. So when he said that, I was just like, you know, alarms were going off. I was like, run, run, run. But we were having such a great time, and it was so easy. 

Levent [15:57 - 16:08]: We had conversed for an extended period of time before we met up. Because you were so busy. We tried a couple of times that one night where the mattress was getting delivered late. We were going to meet up that night, but then we didn't. Fell through. 

Krys [16:09 - 16:16]: So, yeah, we had a lot of bant. We had really great banter before we did. 

Levent [16:16 - 16:27]: I remember. I remember after you left, I was like. Like, I. I probably sense that maybe you were freaked out or whatever, but I'm like, that could go either way. 

Krys [16:27 - 16:28]: Yeah. 

Levent [16:28 - 16:39]: You know, so. So I remember consciously, like, sort of. I don't want to say pulling back, but, like, verify you're okay, but don't be pushy. Like. 

Krys [16:39 - 16:51]: And that's what I tell people. Like, I was so not into. I. I just. I kind of didn't care, I guess. I. I kind of didn't expect anything or care. And you were so. 

Levent [16:51 - 16:54]: It was also not a priority because you had so much going on. 

Krys [16:54 - 16:54]: Yes. 

Levent [16:55 - 16:55]: Yeah. 

Krys [16:55 - 17:08]: You were so persistent without being pushy or, like, me feeling like it was too much. And every time you text me, it was kind of just like, hey, you okay? 

Levent [17:08 - 17:23]: You know, I mean, let's. Let's be candid. It was because my interactions were pointed at helping you. Hey, you're having a yard sale today. Did you eat? Let me bring you lunch. 

Krys [17:23 - 17:23]: Yeah. 

Levent [17:23 - 17:30]: Oh, you're moving that stuff. Let me help you move. Like, it wasn't like, oh, you're in the middle of moving. Let's go out tonight. 

Krys [17:30 - 17:30]: Right. 

Levent [17:30 - 17:34]: You know, it was. It was sort of. I just want to spend time with. 

Krys [17:34 - 17:36]: You, with what you're doing. 

Levent [17:36 - 17:36]: Yeah. 

Krys [17:36 - 18:07]: And you had told me afterwards that you were. You didn't think. Because I had so much going on, you were kind of like, this is probably going to, like, yeah. Fizzle out because she has so much going on. But you really showed up for me really early on without being like. It was just so easy. You just kind of showed up and you're like, yep, whatever. You know, if you need anything, you need something to eat, you need something. And I didn't feel pressured. I felt supported. And since then, I mean, it's been. We've had some ups and downs. 

Levent [18:07 - 18:09]: Sure. Yeah. And we're going to have more. 

Krys [18:09 - 18:12]: And we're going to have more. We've had some ups and downs. 

Levent [18:12 - 18:34]: Well, I mean, we talked about that early on, too. That, like, you know, and I think it's an important message. Life is hard. Like, you're going to have. And. And, you know, it's been a year, and we haven't had a lot of bad things. You know, we haven't had any major illnesses. We haven't had major, like, major life events. 

Krys [18:34 - 18:35]: Yeah. 

Levent [18:35 - 18:36]: You know, things. Yeah. 

Krys [18:36 - 18:37]: Yeah. 

Levent [18:37 - 18:47]: But, you know, and we will. And I think, you know, you need to. You need to understand that and accept that so that. That falls under the whole partner. 

Krys [18:47 - 19:44]: Yeah. And that's something that. When we had. My mother got diagnosed with breast cancer, and because he was. He is so supportive, and I had this. I think looking back, I was sort of scared to let someone help me when I knew I couldn't give anything back. Like, I was so tapped out, and I knew he was gonna help me get through that. And I was just like, I don't want to. I don't want to receive help because I can't do anything back. I can't reciprocate, like, anything. I mentally, physically, everything tapped out. So I pulled back. And during that time I pulled back, you were just kind of like, okay, yeah. You're like, I guess it wasn't what I thought it was. And I was like, oops. And then I. He. He just. You just gave me space to, like, just work out my feelings, I guess. 

Levent [19:45 - 19:55]: Well, I mean, there was other stuff going on too. Like, I mean, I think. I think an important point to discuss, we often laugh about, is I was also under the weather when we first met. 

Krys [19:55 - 19:56]: Oh. Oh, yeah. 

Levent [19:56 - 20:03]: And I don't like germs, and she doesn't like germs. So she's like, who, me? 

Krys [20:03 - 20:04]: Yeah. 

Levent [20:05 - 20:10]: So physically, I stayed away. 

Krys [20:10 - 20:12]: Oh, my God. How did I skip over that part of the story? 

Levent [20:12 - 20:15]: Yeah, go ahead and share that view. Yeah. 

Krys [20:15 - 20:47]: So let's go back to when we first met. So we have this first date. I'm like, whatever about it. He's super supportive, sweet, helping me with things. We're keeping in touch via text. And maybe, like, we saw each other maybe three times within that first two weeks after we first met. And every time we met up, like, the second time we met up, I can't even remember what our second day was. I think we just met at Artist Baker. What is that place called? Artists? No. 

Levent [20:47 - 20:48]: Oh, Abel Baker. 

Krys [20:48 - 20:48]: Abel Baker. 

Levent [20:48 - 20:49]: Yeah. Yeah. 

Krys [20:49 - 21:54]: There's an Artist Baker in Morristown. Yeah, I think we just met for coffee. We were sitting in a park or. But every time we met. So on our first date, we, like, hugged goodbye, which is fine. That's. Yeah, I mean, that's totally appropriate. I wasn't kissing really anybody on a first date. And then our second date, we connected a little bit, but it was kind of just like a pat on the back. And I was like. Like, okay, I'm not gonna make the first move. And then we met up again. And I remember I went to kiss him. Like, we're saying goodbye. This is the third time. We're hanging out. We're obviously dating. And I went to kiss him, and he turned his face, and I was like, what? In the effort in my head, I was like, oh, you are crazy. Like, what is happening? Like, not me. Not today. And. And then the last time. So then that happened. We part. He didn't say anything. You didn't say anything? Because I did not know what was going on for a little bit. 

Levent [21:54 - 21:59]: Was that before or after the restaurant? When you came and sat next to me? 

Krys [21:59 - 22:06]: That was before. That was before. And then. And then. Then the next time. 

Levent [22:06 - 22:07]: I think the restaurant was before that. 

Krys [22:07 - 22:41]: The timeline is irrelevant. The point is, is that we went on, like, four or five dates, and I didn't know what was going on. He was not. I tried to kiss him. He turned his face, and then I did it again on the next date. And he backs up and he goes, I'll kiss you soon. And I just laughed. I was like, what is even going on right now? And then he finally. I don't even think you told me then. I think you told me after the fact. So we went on a date that I was sick. Yeah. So he. 

Levent [22:41 - 22:44]: I had. I was sniffling. I was coughing. 

Krys [22:45 - 22:46]: He was sniffling. 

Levent [22:47 - 22:47]: Yes. 

Krys [22:47 - 23:25]: And listen, that's just a testament to how good of a person he is, because any other guy, like, what I would know, he didn't want to get me sick. And so we went. So there was no physical nothing. So in my mind, I'm like, We're gonna be friends. Yeah. I'm, like, pumped because he's awesome. And I'm like. He's like an awesome person. Like, I'm happy to have a friend right now, honestly. And we went on a date in Jersey City, and it was in a little booth. What's it called? You need to just. 

Levent [23:25 - 23:26]: It's fine. 

Krys [23:26 - 23:30]: Michael's, Martin's. What's it called? It's some little place in Jersey City. 

Levent [23:30 - 23:33]: Yeah. Off a grove, was it? Whatever. 

Krys [23:33 - 23:46]: Yeah. It doesn't matter. But they have these little tiny booths that are, like, for two people, but it's a booth. And I went. We sat down. We're eating. And I went, you can't hit people in the face. 

Levent [23:46 - 23:49]: Lay down, lay down, lay down, lay down. 

Krys [23:49 - 24:11]: This is a whole nightmare. Who's still. Everybody watching turned it off. They're like, what is. Even if they're listening on Spotify, they're like, what is even going on? My dog, if you're not watching this, my dog is pawing and has been pawing at Levent because she's just. There we go. Okay. Look at that. And she's. All right. There we go. 

Levent [24:11 - 24:11]: Okay. 

Krys [24:11 - 24:21]: Oh, my God. Sitting at the restaurant in this tiny little booth across from one another. And I get up and I go to the bathroom, and I come back. 

Levent [24:22 - 24:27]: And we're not getting ready to get the check. We were done. I don't think we had ordered dessert yet, but it was like. 

Krys [24:27 - 24:29]: We didn't drink. We weren't drinking. 

Levent [24:29 - 24:30]: End of the meal. 

Krys [24:30 - 24:47]: Yes. It was at the end of the meal, we. That we already got the check. The check already came. I think I went to the bathroom before we were leaving, and when I came back, I sat on his side, and it was only, like, you know, he had to, like, move over, and his eyes sort of, like, lit up. 

Levent [24:47 - 24:53]: Yeah. I remember literally saying to myself, oh, she likes me. I was like, okay. 

Krys [24:53 - 25:17]: And then, like, he put his hand on my leg, and this is like, guys, this is like, I'm 40. He's 55. 4. 54. Like, this is like, our fifth date. And both of us were like, he put his hand on my leg. And I felt like a teenager. I was just like, he likes me. Like, just absolutely ridiculous. And so we leave the place. 

Levent [25:17 - 25:19]: Oh, my God. Pouring rain. 

Krys [25:19 - 25:31]: Pouring rain. And we parked God knows where. And one of the first things we found out about each other that we have in common is we both have zero sense of direction. 

Levent [25:31 - 25:32]: Zero. 

Krys [25:32 - 25:50]: Like, we just do not know where we're going. If ways is not On. So we leave the place, it's pouring rain. We have not an umbrella. Okay. And we start running through the streets of Jersey City looking for the car, which we cannot find. It is torrential downpour. 

Levent [25:50 - 25:51]: We ready to call an Uber? 

Krys [25:51 - 25:55]: Yeah, like going to call an Uber to drive us around to look for the car. 

Levent [25:55 - 25:57]: Cuz it's pouring out and it's cold. It was like March. 

Krys [25:57 - 26:05]: It was cold. And we were, we must have been running around in the rain for at least 10 minutes. 

Levent [26:05 - 26:06]: At least. 

Krys [26:06 - 26:09]: At least 10 minutes. And then we were going to call it Uber. And then I don't know if it. 

Levent [26:09 - 26:13]: Was you or me, but we saw like graffiti that. Yeah. 

Krys [26:13 - 26:18]: And I was like, oh, I think it was over here. And sure enough, we turned the corner in the car. 

Levent [26:18 - 26:20]: It was a red Mini. When we had the red Mini. 

Krys [26:20 - 26:32]: Yeah. And the, and the car was right there. And we got in the car and we were just laughing. We were just like hysterical laughing. And that's something that I do with you all the time. We just laugh. We do all the time. 

Levent [26:32 - 26:33]: Yes. 

Krys [26:33 - 26:47]: And it starts super early in the morning. And that's going to go into our next episode that we're gonna talk about healthy relationship habits. I think it took, I mean, I know it took some work for us to get there, but I feel like we're figuring it out. 

Levent [26:47 - 26:49]: Well, we're always going to be figuring it out. 

Krys [26:49 - 26:50]: Yeah. Okay. 

Levent [26:52 - 26:52]: It's. 

Krys [26:53 - 26:56]: Yes, yes. We're always going to be figuring it out. 

Levent [26:56 - 26:57]: Yeah. 

Krys [26:57 - 27:40]: But for anybody who's listening, who is wanting a partnership or relationship and actually, you know what, what would you say to someone who has been on and off of the apps and who is ready to be in a partnership? Like, what's some advice that you can give to women specifically? Because that's mostly who's listening. Men to, but women specifically, who might be listening, like, what would you tell them? What are some, what are some things that were right coming from me? Right. Like as a, as a partner, what are some things that women can do more of to find that person? 

Levent [27:40 - 29:03]: I mean, I think as you get older, two things come to mind. One is you need to know yourself. You know, I have three, you know, 25, 26, 23 year old daughters. And when we talk about dating, it's just like, you know, when you, when you're looking to date at 20, you think anything is possible. You think anything's possible with you. You think anything's possible with whoever you're dating. You think you can change, you think you can change them and all at 53, you're like, I know what I like. You know, there's compromise, there's things that you can, you know, work around. But, you know, there are certain things that become non negotiable about you that are important to you and then that you're looking for in the other person. And if you don't know what those things are, then it's just a big waste of time. And then on, on the other side of that is, is that whoever you end up with, that you want to end up with, you got to make sure they're giving you all of that. You know, they're not playing games. They're being like, you know, if they're, if they're not looking for a serious relationship, then they shouldn't pretend to be. Like, it's, it's. If they're not okay with dating someone that has, then they need to tell you that. So it's knowing yourself and then whoever you're with is being honest with you. I think those are the two most important things. 

Krys [29:03 - 29:11]: How do you know if someone's being honest with you? Is it like you to ask the right questions based on your non negotiables? 

Levent [29:11 - 29:29]: I think, I think there's a, there's an element of intuition, there's an element of experience. And you, you know, you get to, you get this, you get to, you, you see it, you know that they, they, you know, if they want to, they will. 

Krys [29:29 - 29:29]: Yeah. Actions. 

Levent [29:30 - 29:47]: Yeah. Yeah. Stuck. Lay down. Get on the bed. Come on. Lay on the bed. Get on the bed. Come on. Yeah. I mean, whether we accept that. I think we've all been in relationships where the person, you know, the flags, they're showing you their flags and you're like, no, no, no, that can't be. 

Krys [29:47 - 30:10]: What are some flags? Tell us some flags. What are your red flags? I wonder if I had any key eaters. Oh, that was. Oh, my God. So he, he asked me one time. We, we have been talking for like two, three weeks. This is before we kissed. Okay. We didn't even kiss at this point. And he's asking me what kind of food I like. What did I say? What was my answer? 

Levent [30:11 - 30:13]: I don't remember. But he would just kind of shoot it off. 

Krys [30:13 - 30:16]: Yeah. It was like, you'll find out. 

Levent [30:16 - 30:16]: Yeah, yeah. 

Krys [30:16 - 30:19]: If you're meant to find out, you'll find out. Like, why are you asking me? 

Levent [30:19 - 30:21]: But all that makes sense now, right? 

Krys [30:21 - 30:35]: Yeah, yeah, yeah. He is an excellent cook. But I, I do remember saying, like, you know, all the foods I said Something. And you were like, you're not vegan, are you? And I was like, who hurt you? 

Levent [30:35 - 30:35]: Yeah. 

Krys [30:35 - 30:39]: And I was like, no, I eat, I eat kind of like everything. And I do, I think, I think. 

Levent [30:39 - 31:55]: That'S a big one. I think being culturally sensitive because of my background and being open to diversity and things of that nature, I think is important. Yeah. Just being, having the ability, like I've seen and I've been with people that are just not happy and which, which again, is, is life. You know, there's ups and downs and, you know, you need, you support each other and you do all that kind of stuff. But there are some people that are just not fundamentally happy. And I think it back to the first point, because they're not ready. They haven't explored what they're looking for. And then there's a bunch of stuff going on. I mean, I think, I think the flags are all around. I, I think. But at the same time, I think we all need to be careful because there are times, and I've seen women do this, especially older women, where to them, it's like checking off boxes. And they assume, because you check off the first three boxes, you're in your 50s, you know, you have kids, you were divorced and all that, like, then it means that you're gonna check off 10 more boxes. 

Krys [31:55 - 31:56]: Right. 

Levent [31:56 - 31:59]: And they don't even bother getting to the other 10 boxes. 

Krys [31:59 - 32:00]: They're assuming. 

Levent [32:00 - 32:00]: They're assuming. 

Krys [32:00 - 32:01]: Yeah. 

Levent [32:01 - 32:29]: And, and you know, I've heard it from individuals that were, you know, at a certain age, they didn't have kids. Like, they would assume, like, oh, this guy's already got, have kids. He's never going to want to have kids, you know, which may be a majority, but until you ask, you don't, you don't know. Yeah. So. And then I think there's also a lot of negativity because people just have bad experiences because there's a bunch of jerks on both sides. 

Krys [32:29 - 33:23]: Yeah. Just being let down over and over again. Ultimately, happiness is a choice you have to make every day. I mean, otherwise you just, life will beat you down. And I think that's something both of us do really well. And I have, I, I, I thought, I mean, I know I'm fairly good at it, but I thought I was really good at it. And then you've showed me that, you know, you're, you're really good at it. And you wake up just with a smile on your face, and it is so. I feel so grateful to have that in my life. And it Makes such a huge difference. But you can easily wake up. Not like that. Right. It's totally a choice. I mean, you got to get up early. It's cold. There's a million dogs jumping, and they want this. Your back hurts. You didn't have a good night's sleep. So there's a million reasons to not be. The fan is on my fan. I tried to get you earplugs. They didn't work. 

Levent [33:23 - 33:25]: I sleep in a jet airplane. 

Krys [33:25 - 33:46]: It's a very small fan. It's actually, like, this big, and I put it on low. So, yeah, I mean, I compromised. The dogs used to all sleep on the bed. Now they do. Not just this psycho. Yeah, she's the only one, because, as you could see, she's severely attached. 

Levent [33:46 - 33:47]: Neglected. 

Krys [33:47 - 33:48]: Yeah. 

Levent [33:48 - 33:49]: Poor baby. 

Krys [33:50 - 33:52]: Thank you for putting up with my fan. 

Levent [33:52 - 33:53]: No problem. 

Krys [33:53 - 33:54]: And me. 

Levent [33:54 - 33:55]: No problem. My pleasure. 

Krys [33:57 - 33:59]: And thanks for being on the Fit Like Krys podcast. 

Levent [34:00 - 34:01]: Can't wait for the next one. 

Krys [34:01 - 34:40]: It's about to happen in five minutes. Thank you guys so much for listening. If you have any questions for either of us, feel free to shoot them over. I think under Spotify, you can actually leave a text on YouTube, you can leave a comment and just remember that happiness, connection, all that stuff you want in a partnership or relationship, it is a. It is a choice that you have to make every day. It's so easy to kind of be, like, in your own head and be super affected by the world around us, especially now. So making that choice to put the effort in and just be there for your partner and be open and have fun. 

Levent [34:40 - 34:41]: Yes. 

Krys [34:41 - 34:53]: And with that last, last tip, we're gonna leave you there, but come back for the next episode where we're gonna talk about healthy relationship habits. Thank you so much for listening. Thank you so much for joining.