Loosen the Grip on Your Goals

In this episode of the Fit Like Krys podcast, Krys continues the theme of letting go—this time focusing on the pressure we place on ourselves around goals and control. While goal-setting is a key part of her wellness philosophy, Krys breaks down how becoming too attached to those goals can create anxiety, burnout, and missed opportunities. Instead, she offers a more flexible, empowering approach rooted in mindfulness, intention, and self-acceptance.

What’s Inside This Episode:
Krys walks listeners through four major concepts to help shift from goal attachment to goal commitment—with less pressure and more peace.

1. Attachment vs. Commitment

Krys explains the difference between being committed to a goal and being attached to it.

• Commitment builds confidence through daily effort.
• Attachment creates anxiety by fixating on the outcome.
  She encourages listeners to examine whether they feel empowered or overwhelmed by the goals they’ve set.

2. Mindfulness in the Day-to-Day

Often, anxiety comes from living in a future that hasn’t arrived yet.
 Krys urges the use of daily mindfulness practices—like journaling, meditation, deep breathing, or movement—to pull back into the present moment. These simple tools can reduce stress and improve focus on what can actually be done today.

3. Shift from Goals to Intentions

Rather than holding tightly to big, long-term goals, Krys suggests using daily or weekly intentions and priorities as a guide.
Whether it’s saving money, losing weight, or improving your routine, breaking down big goals into small, actionable steps can keep you grounded and consistent—without the pressure of chasing a fixed result.

4. Acceptance vs. Denial

A big theme of the episode is the importance of accepting your current reality.
 Krys explains how clinging to how things should look keeps people stuck. Instead, she invites listeners to work with their current life, body, and circumstances—not against them. Letting go of the “perfect time” and embracing the now creates space for real growth.

Key Takeaways:

• Set goals, but don’t hold on too tightly—set it and forget it.
• Replace rigid goals with clear intentions and daily commitments.
• Practice mindfulness to stay in the present and reduce overwhelm.
• Embrace where you are and who you are, and work from there.

Bonus Reminder:
The Happy Hoodie is available now for pre-order at fitlikekrys.com through April 15. Krys reminds listeners to donate something from their closet before buying something new.

Connect with Krys:
Website: fitlikekrys.com
Instagram: @fitlikekrys
Email: fitlikekrys@gmail.com

If this episode resonated with you—or made you think of someone who could use a reminder to release control and embrace intention—share it with them. And don’t forget to subscribe, save, or give it a thumbs up on your favorite platform.

New episodes drop weekly.

Transcript

Krys [0:00 - 23:15]: Foreign. Welcome back to the Fit Like krys podcast. Thank you so much for tuning in. If you are watching on YouTube, please make sure you subscribe. And if you hear something in this episode that really strikes a chord and reminds you of someone, please share it with them. Sometimes one sentence can just like transform your day or your month or your life. You know, there's definitely things I've heard that have just it was like, at the right time that I heard it and it really transformed my life. So don't underestimate the power of a podcast. And if you feel inspired by it, please share it with somebody else. And if you're listening on Spotify, make sure to heart this, Download it, save it for later, listen, listen to it on your next, on your next walk or maybe on your next vacation when you're in the airport. Really great, great way to spend time, by the way, like downloading podcast episodes. This is like a new thing to me. So I'm sorry if some of you who are listening are like, wow, welcome to the future. But when you download episodes beforehand and like, you can listen on the plane, like, I love listening to podcasts like on a plane. Anywho, thank you so much for tuning in to the Fit Like krys podcast. And today as episode is, we're sort of in this theme of letting go. And so my last episode about spring cleaning, I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you've started your process. If you haven't listened to the episode or started your spring cleaning process, there's still time. We're still in spring. We got a little ways to go till summer so you have time to listen to that episode. But today I'm talking about letting go of goals and control. And that's an interesting topic for me because I talk, all I talk about are goals, you know, and setting goals and making goals. And I think this is an important episode because of that specifically and just to bring clarity around the difference between attachment versus commitment when it comes to goals. And it's really not a matter of control because we don't have control. And there's a lot more that we can experience if we let go of it a little bit. But how do you let go of control? Like, how do you let go? How do you create a goal and then let go of it? So that's what I'm. That's what I'm going through today. So I'm going to give you. I'm going to go through four different areas to help you let go of your goals and control. So the first Thing I want to talk about. And you're definitely going to want to get a piece of paper and a pen here. Especially if you feel like you're. If you're a little bit of a control freak. I say freak in a good way. Okay. I love that word. Put me in the freak club. I don't know what that means, but now we're. Now I'm in a freak club. Okay, great. Control freaks are welcome is all I'm saying. I'm saying it in a positive way. And I like to have control. I like things to be in order. I like to know what's going on. And at the same time, I've learned that if I am attached too attached to my plan and my goals, it's just a recipe for disaster. Because life is not on our timeline. We are on life's timeline. So the chance that something is going in our way, the chance that something goes the way that we want it perfectly, is actually such a slim chance in comparison to how many other ways it could go. All right, so goals, letting go of goals and control. The first thing I want to talk about is the difference between attachment and commitment. Like. Like, so. So how do you know if you're committed to a goal versus attached to a goal? By the way, this hoodie is now available on my website. This is the happy hoodie I just want. Okay, how cute is this it? Like, we did the distressed. If you're not watching on YouTube, I'm, like, getting up in my. I'm now recording my podcast via Zoom, because my podcast guy, I haven't been able to get him over here. So I'm like, you know what? I'm just going to do it in my office on my Zoom. Anyway, happy hoodie now available from now to. You could order till April 15. There might be some available after that, but we're doing pre orders right now. Any who attachment versus commitment. That's the problem when I do it on Zoom because I see myself and I'm distracted. How do you know? So, like, if you're really set on a goal, like, and you don't want to get distracted, like, one would ask, like, how do you know the difference between being committed to a goal and being attached to a goal? Isn't it the same? No, it is not the same. And I'm going to tell you the biggest difference. When you're committed to a goal that creates confidence, every day you're doing something towards that goal. That is creating confidence. Right? Attachment creates anxiety. So if you're feeling anxiety Around a certain goal, it's really likely that you are so attached to it and you're trying to control it so much that you're just killing it. You're killing it. You're not even giving your space, yourself, space to grow because you're just holding on so tight to this. To this desired outcome that you're not allowing for any other possible path to open up. And that's the really cool thing about staying committed to a goal. As you're working towards the goal, you will come up on different opportunities and you'll learn different things. And sometimes, like, if you're paying attention, you will intentionally want to switch directions and try something else. But if you're so attached to a specific goal, you might miss out on an opportunity or a direction that actually works better for you. So if you feel anxiety about a goal, you might be going the wrong way. You might be going. You might be on such a rigid route that, that it's not going to work. It's. It's going to work in the sense that you might start to see results, but it's gonna cause so much anxiety and stress, you're not gonna feel good. So then what's the point? What's the point of achieving something, of growing, of making progress? If you're causing yourself stress and anxiety, it doesn't have to be that way. There are so many ways to get to the same place. So as you create a goal and as you start to work towards it, I want you to ask yourself that question. Do I feel confident as I'm working towards this goal, or do I feel anxiety? Commitment creates confidence. Attachment creates anxiety. So start to look at that a little bit. Okay. Number two. Number two, how to let go of goals in control. Number two, having a daily mindfulness practice. So what do I mean by that? Because mindfulness is a big umbrella. One of the things that causes us to be attached, right, and creates anxiety is because we're attached to a future expectation that is, it's not even here, and we're so attached to it that it's creating anxiety in this, in. In today, and it's not even here. Sort of your, your. What you're expecting to happen is becoming an excuse. Sometimes, Sometimes what you're expecting to happen becomes like your excuse of the day. Like you're expecting. You're like, when I, you know, like when I have time, when I, When I get. When I lose the weight, okay, when I lose the 20 pounds, then I'll. Or when I clean out my closet, then I'LL or when I get rid of this stuff, then I'll, or when I, when I get another job, then I'll have time for when I, blah, blah, blah, then I'll break up with like we live in this, like when I, this, this future reality that becomes your excuse for not moving on something now, right? So you, you're sort of like out of the present. You're, you're robbing yourself from the present experience because you're like, well, when I, then I'll do this. We're like living in this expected goal that hasn't even. And that's why it creates anxiety, because it seems so far away. You're like, yeah, like, you know, when I have the extra time, then I'll do this. But the when I might never, it might never get here. And so like what's happening in the day? So a daily mindfulness practice is something just to bring you back here. It's to bring you back in this moment. It's to bring you back to what's happening today. Mindfulness is just paying attention and it's something that we have to practice because there are so many distractions that if you don't practice coming back to like today, you will constantly be in the future. And the future is undetermined, which for a lot of people creates anxiety because you don't know. What you do know is where you are, who you are, how you feel today for the most part, right? That's the, that's the. If you, if you want to have control of something, the most control you're going to have is of today. So something that can help you, help you let go of control is to actually just like bring control that, that creates anxiety is to bring yourself to today. And just tomorrow has its own troubles, right? So like just bringing yourself to today by deep, by taking 10 deep breaths, by doing a quick yoga class, by doing a one minute meditation, by writing down things you're grateful for, like all of these things that kind of bring you in the moment. They might not be like life changing that one time, but that's not the point. It's the practice of continuing to bring yourself back so that you're not constantly living in this expected reality. Right? Like I'll get to that. When, you know, like we always, we're kind of almost like living in the future all the time. So think about like what, what daily things you do that sort of bring you in the moment and sort of try to, try to create like a little thing that you could do every day. That helps with mindfulness. The third thing that's going to help you let go of goals and control is differentiating and kind of redefining how you get towards that goal. Intention. Like, I like the word intention, and I like. Just like picking a word, like, instead of a goal, instead of saying, okay, I want to save $20,000 this year, $10,000, 30, that. Whatever the number is, $1,000. I want to save X amount this year. I want to pay this amount of debt or I want to lose this amount of weight. When you. If you get attached to that goal, it's going to create anxiety every day because that goal is so far away. Oh, my goodness. So like, every day you have that, like, weight of that big goal. So instead of that, like, create the intention. If you're like, let. Let me give you an example. If your goal is to pay down debt, set an intention of doing a daily budget. So, like, reviewing what you spend each day. Like, set an intention of spending less on takeout. Set an intention of putting $50 a week into. So that's so much like that. Not only is it doable, but it's like, I mean, you. It will. It will give you. That goes back to number one where, like, if you have commitment to that intention, it's going to create conf. And that thing that you're doing every day, it's just keeping you here in the day and you're working towards that goal. So you can have, like, a bigger goal, but don't let that thing be in your face every day. Right? Like, sometimes you'll say, like, you know, you'll have the big goal in front of you. Like, that's anxiety inducing. It's not. It's one way. Like, you can try it that way, but if you've done it that way and it hasn't worked, if you've made a New Year's resolution and it hasn't worked, I'm offering you sort of this different idea, all right? And letting go of the goal. Letting go of the goal. It's not. Doesn't mean that you don't set the goal. Okay? It's a crock pot. Set it and forget it. Set it. But then create like you need the recipe, right? Like you need the recipe. What are the steps? You can't just. The crock pot doesn't have air in it, right? Like, there are things that you do, and you put it in there, and then it's cooking. It's cooking. Okay? Like, I don't know if this is a Good metaphor, but it felt right. Set it in. Forget it was the right one, and then I just went left with it. I don't know. But I'm telling you that the goal is something that you can like, all right, I want to. I want to lose 30 pounds. Okay? Don't be so fixated on that big goal, because that is going to be sort of. You can't accomplish that in a day. What can you accomplish in a day that's going to get you towards that goal? So instead of goal, just swap it out with intention, swap it out with priority, and focus more on priorities and intentions rather than goals. If you feel like you have a control issue and you have more anxiety than confidence when it comes to your goals, take the word goal out of it and make it more of an intention or a priority. And here's the last thing. Acceptance versus denial. A lot of times we are so stuck on the story, so stuck on the way that we wanted things to go, that we will not accept the way things are. We are so stuck on the way that we think, Think something should look. We're so stuck on the way, on the result that we think we should have got based on what we did, that we will not accept reality. And when you don't accept reality, you are stuck in this. What's that thing called? When. Oh, there's nobody here to answer me. This is a podcast. Usually in a class, I get somebody to answer me. You're. You're just in the purgatory. That's it. I think that's it. You're in purgatory. Like, you're not going anywhere. Like, you're in this. You're going to be in it until you're not. Like, at some point, you're going to have to accept it. So instead of wishing you were somewhere else, instead of resisting your life, like, sometimes. And that's. That goes back to the. When I have the time. No, no, no. What time do you have now? Right? Like, what time do you have now? Like, when I. When I have. When I, you know, when my kids are older, then I'll write the book. It's like, you don't. There's no. You have to accept the path that you're on right now in the life that you have right now. And if you are so tied to a fairy tale goal, it doesn't mean that you'll never have it, achieve it, have something more, less in between. That's irrelevant. What. What today's messages and what this episode is about is that when you're attached too much to something. Not only do you miss out on opportunity, but you create anxiety in your life and you're sort of robbing yourself from experiencing the life you were given by waiting for something else to happen or by being so stuck on one thing, so stuck in one way, in one mindset. Like it's my way or the highway. Listen, if you're it's my way or the highway, you're going to be on that highway. You're going to be on the highway alone. You're going to be cruising because ain't going to be no traffic. No one wants to be around someone that it's my way or the highway. You have to be flexible enough to allow other circumstances to exist. And I know that that might sound like obvious, right? Like that might sound like, well, yeah, but, but a lot of us are very. Are not. And I remember like I that, like it'd be like, no, this is the way that it's going to be. There is no other way. This is the way. No, I'm doing it this way. I'm waving a phone charger for all my YouTube watchers. You've got to loosen your grip. Your expectations are just becoming excuses because you are talking in the future and you're not in the future. You remember the Jetsons? We ain't even. We thought we would be flying around in cars and putting a pellet in a microwave when we'd have a whole meal. We don't even. We don't how many. We're still not there yet. Expectations versus reality. Accepting reality. Accepting that you don't have an extra hour. Accepting that fitness and wellness is not going to look like Melissa Woodhealth or whatever her name is drinking green juice and doing eight hours and wearing a weighted vest and intermittent fat. Like you might just have time for a 15 minute workout and drinking enough water. You have to accept where you are in order to move forward. That's the message today. Not only accept, but embrace where you are. Commit to something. Commit to something and work on it daily. Commit to something and have the flexibility in your life to allow something else to happen. Like commit to something because you want it, but understand that it might not happen because you want it that way. And that's not an excuse for you to stop. And that's why mindfulness helps too. Because mindfulness and taking 10 deep breaths and pausing and, and all of these things and making an intention versus a goal, these things allow flexibility in your life so you could still make progress and still work towards your goals, but you're not so attached to it. I want you to have less anxiety in your life. I want you to feel good in your day to day. How do you do that? Commit to something and do things daily that make sense towards that bigger goal. Okay. Practice something that slows you down for at least a minute a day. Pick a word or create an intention each week that's in line with that bigger goal. And accept where you are and who you are in the body you have and the mind you have in the relationship you have. Stop waiting for the perfect time, the perfect person, the perfect body for you to live your life. Live it today, live it now. You have control of a lot more if you're accepting of today. So let go. Let go of the goals. Create an intention instead. Set a goal. Set it and forget it. That's a goal. Set it and forget it. Create the daily intention. See how it changes. Think about something that you've had a tight grip on for a while and you've just been nose down, not even looking up. Maybe it's not working. Maybe you gotta stop going that way. The road is closed. You know how we, sometimes we try to make a relationship, a friendship, Work so hard and like, it's just not working. Step back. Sometimes you got to give something space. Step back. That's a whole other episode. Like, give it a moment. Can't just keep doing that pounding. I do a lot. I talk with my hands. So it's a problem if you're listening on Spotify, you're like, what's even happening right now? So you want to review. Okay, we're letting go of goals. Goals are setting and forget it. We're not holding on to goals on a daily basis because that, that's attachment and that's going to create anxiety. So take your attachment, turn it into commit. Okay? Every single day, practice being present with breath. Work with meditation, with yoga, with journaling, with setting an intention. And then that helps you to be intentional and create intentions and aim and work towards something instead of just having a rigid goal. And then accept where you are, who you are, and know it's exactly who you're supposed to be and exactly where you're supposed to be. Stop denying who you are and the life you have and the people in your life. Work with your body. Work with the job that you hate. Work in the relationship. That's not going so well right now. Work with like the perfect. The perfect A, B, C, D, E. It doesn't exist. How about you just work with what you got, and then go from there. Okay? If you can appreciate who you are, where you are, who you have, what you have today, I promise you that it only gets better from here. Thank you guys so much for tuning into the Fit Like krys podcast. I will see you next week. And remember, happy as FLK Spring summer swag is now out shop. Happy. Make yourself happy. Make sure that you donate at least one hoodie before you buy this one. All right, guys, thank you so much. Share this with somebody who needs a little less control and a little more intention in their life. And if that's you, I hope this helped, and I'll see you next time.