EP 274 — How Do I Know If I Have Autism? (And What to Look For in Yourself)

Do you relate to autism traits but aren’t sure what it actually means for you? In this episode, we go beyond surface-level checklists and explore the real patterns to look for — from social processing and sensory sensitivity to masking and feeling “different.” Learn how to tell the difference between occasional traits and consistent patterns, and how to approach the question of autism with clarity rather than confusion.

Transcript

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Hello and welcome back to and how does that make you feel an awaken podcast? I'm Jack, therapist and founder of Awaken Online Therapy, and today we're discussing how you can know if you have autism and what to look out for in yourself. Let's start with the obvious question that most people might ask themselves at some point in their life. Do I have autism or am I just overthinking this? Maybe you're noticing things like social situations feel confusing or draining. You're replaying conversations in your head, you feel overwhelmed by noise, lights, or busy environments, you've always felt a bit different. You like routine or struggle when things change, and you mask or perform socially. And then you see content about autism and you think to yourself, that does sound a little bit like me. But then immediately isn't everyone like that. Am I just labeling myself? Do I really need to know? So you end up stuck in uncertainty, and that's exactly what we're going to unpack today. So, firstly, what autism actually is. Let's simplify this. Autism is a difference in how the brain processes the world. It mainly affects social processing, sensory processing, communication, need for predictability, and pattern recognition. So autism is not about intelligence. It's not about personality, it's about how the brain processes information. So the biggest mistake people make is this. They ask themselves, do I have these traits sometimes? But that might be the wrong question. Because everyone has traits occasionally. Everyone feels awkward sometimes, gets overwhelmed, misses social cues, and likes routine. The real question is, are these patterns consistent, long term, and impacting my life? So here are some of the key patterns to look out for. Let's go through this properly, not surface level traits, but actual patterns. Firstly, the social processing feels effortful. This might look like struggling to read between the lines really often, not always understanding tone or sarcasm, overthinking conversations, replaying interactions after they happen, and not knowing what's expected socially. And it might feel like everyone else seems to get this, but I have to think about it more. Secondly, you might feel drained by social interaction. This might look like needing time alone after socializing, feeling mentally exhausted after conversations, and avoiding certain social environments. And there is an important distinction to make between what we've just described and simply being introverted. It's processing overload. Third, you've got sensory sensitivity. This might include noise feeling overwhelming, bright lights feeling very uncomfortable, crowds feeling excessively intense, and certain textures or smells bothering you. And it feels like this environment is too much. Fourth, strong preference for routine or predictability. This might look like feeling unsettled when plans change, wanting to know what's happening in advance, creating structure to feel more in control, because predictability is going to help you reduce overwhelm. Fifth, deep focus or intense interests. You might dive deeply into specific topics, spend hours focusing on something, or prefer depth over breadth. And it might feel like comfort and engagement, not just interest. Sixth, masking, and this is a big one. I know we spoke about it before, but masking essentially means adapting your behavior to fit in. This might look like forcing eye contact, rehearsing conversations, copying others socially, hiding discomfort, and it feels like you're playing a role instead of just being you. And seventh, feeling different growing up. This is one of the biggest indicators we see. You might have felt consistently out of place, not really fully understood, and like you were observing rather than fitting in. So why do so many people not realize until adulthood that they might have autism? Some of the reasons include you masked stuff really, really well, you adapted, you were high functioning, your traits were internal. And this is especially common in women, professionals, and people who learn to fit in. So instead of being identified early, you were labeled as quiet, sensitive, overthinking, and different. So what is the difference between autism, anxiety, and ADHD? Because this is where most of the confusion happens. With autism, it tends to be based on social and sensory processing differences. With anxiety, it tends to be fear-based thinking and worry. And with ADHD, it tends to be attention and regulation differences. Overlap, of course, exists, but the drivers are completely different. So you need to ask yourself, is this about processing the world differently or reacting to it with fear? One of the other biggest questions I get asked around this topic is do I need a diagnosis? So let's be honest about this. Diagnosis can help if you want clarity, you need support, and it's impacting your life in a big way. But you don't necessarily need one to learn about yourself, use helpful strategies, and adjust your environment. So what I would say is ask yourself this would this change something meaningful for me? So what does it actually mean if you are autistic? And this is a really, really important part because there's so much stigma around this topic. Being autistic does not mean you're broken, you're less capable, or you need fixing. It simply means your brain processes the world very differently. So you might need different environments, clear communication, more recovery time, structured routines. And you might have strengths like deep thinking, pattern recognition, honesty, focus, and a unique perspective. So what should you do next after hearing all this, especially if some of the stuff has resonated? Firstly, stay curious, not reactive. Don't rush to label anything. You just don't need to. Secondly, observe patterns over a period of time. Autism is not just about moments, it's about consistency over a longer duration. Third, try and learn more. We have lots of different episodes that are related to this topic. Try and understand more because it's going to reduce the confusion. Fourth, consider professional support if it's needed, especially if you feel it's impacting your life in a big way. And fifth, focus on what helps, regardless of the diagnosis. You might notice some symptoms that you have some form of solution or help for. So try them. So what is the bigger truth around autism? Here's what this topic really comes down to. This is not about deciding if you have autism. It's about understanding how you experience the world. So if you do take one thing from this episode, let it be this. The question is not just do I have autism, it's do these patterns explain my experiences in a way that helps me understand myself better? Because that's where the real change is going to happen. As always, thank you so much for listening. And if you have found this podcast useful, feel free to rate us five stars on your streaming platform of choice, or even feel free to share it with a friend that it might be useful for. We do post every single day. I've been Jack, and this has been And How Does That Make You Feel an Awakened Podcast, and I'll look forward to seeing you in the next one.