Middle Fingers Up
Welcome to Middle Fingers Up, the show where we keep our heads high and our middle fingers higher. We explore relationships, mental health and everything in between. Join me, Kiran Randhawa on the journey to learn, grow and find our voice.
Middle Fingers Up
EP.123 - Tony Nabors - "We Gotta Bust Our Ass To Do This Unlearning"
What happens when you finally find the words for what you've been carrying your whole life? "Suddenly, I had language for things that I'm experiencing." That’s the power of sitting down with someone like Tony Nabors, a racial equity educator and truth-teller who doesn’t just talk about systems—he helps us feel and understand them.
In this raw and unfiltered episode, we talk about what it means to unlearn, to let go of people-pleasing, and to reclaim your power even when it hurts. We get into the heartbreaking reality that "sometimes the people we love truly don’t give a shit"—and what it takes to reclaim your power anyway.
From confronting the myth of being “a good person” to unpacking how "niceness is a tool of white supremacy," Tony challenges us to "prioritize the intersect that makes people the most uncomfortable." This conversation is not about shame—it’s about transformation. It’s about asking: "What does new community look like?" "What do new friendships look like?"
So if you’ve ever wondered whether you’re alone in this work, if you’ve ever wrestled with the loss that comes with growth, or if you’ve ever said to yourself, "I can change and transform and control what I do going forward"—this episode is for you.
"Can we cuss on this podcast?" Hell yes. Because this one’s about getting real.
www.racialequityinsights.com
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In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.