Middle Fingers Up
Welcome to Middle Fingers Up, the show where we keep our heads high and our middle fingers higher. We explore relationships, mental health and everything in between. Join me, Kiran Randhawa on the journey to learn, grow and find our voice.
Middle Fingers Up
EP.165 - Patty-"Nobody Talks About The Joy"
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In this episode, I sit down with psychologist and writer Patty for a powerful conversation about the inner worlds of children of immigrants and how childhood conditioning continues to shape adult identity, relationships, and wellbeing.
Patty brings both clinical expertise and lived experience as an Indian psychologist, a mother raising two biracial daughters, and someone navigating life and partnership across race and culture. Together, we explore how obedience, guilt, silence, and sacrifice are often normalized in immigrant households and how those patterns quietly follow people into adulthood.
This episode examines why so many children of immigrants grow up lacking language for their emotional experiences, how unprocessed conflict and missing repair shape anxiety and shame, and why saying “I turned out fine” often masks deeper burnout, disconnection, or physical symptoms. Rather than staying stuck in the past, the focus is on what healing can look like now and how doing this work impacts future generations.
From parenting differently, to redefining responsibility and gratitude, to understanding how the body holds stress and trauma, this conversation invites listeners to get curious, question inherited narratives, and reclaim authorship over their own lives.
If you grew up between cultures and have ever wondered “Where is this coming from?” or “Who am I outside of who I was taught to be?”, this episode offers language, validation, and a place to begin.
Instagram: pjtemple7
Website: pjtemple.com
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In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.