EPISODE 57
When your nervous system has grown accustomed to chaos, things like stillness , rest, and slowing down feel unsafe. Because of this we often choose "healing" modalities that feed into the familiarity of chaos and intensity.
So are the cold plunges and HIIT workouts hurting your healing? I don't know. But join me for a conversation to talk through how they might be, to talk about how they held me back in my early healing journey and what I'd do differently if I knew then what I know now.
Looking for more personalized support?
3 take aways from today's conversation:
Have questions you'd like me to answer on the podcast? SUBMIT HERE
Website: https://www.riseaswe.com/podcast
Email: amanda@riseaswe.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amandaontherise/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise
EPISODE 57
When your nervous system has grown accustomed to chaos, things like stillness , rest, and slowing down feel unsafe. Because of this we often choose "healing" modalities that feed into the familiarity of chaos and intensity.
So are the cold plunges and HIIT workouts hurting your healing? I don't know. But join me for a conversation to talk through how they might be, to talk about how they held me back in my early healing journey and what I'd do differently if I knew then what I know now.
Looking for more personalized support?
3 take aways from today's conversation:
Have questions you'd like me to answer on the podcast? SUBMIT HERE
Website: https://www.riseaswe.com/podcast
Email: amanda@riseaswe.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amandaontherise/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise
0:00
Welcome to regulate and rewire and anxiety and depression podcast where we discuss the things I wish someone would have taught me earlier in my healing journey. I'm your host, Amanda Armstrong. And I'll be sharing my steps, my missteps, client experiences and tangible research based tools to help you regulate your nervous system, rewire your mind and reclaim your life. Thanks for being here. Now let's dive in.
0:27
We're going to jump right into talking about your nervous system today. And what I want to help you understand is that when your nervous system that has grown accustomed to chaos, things like stillness and rest feel unsafe, and they feel unsafe because they are unfamiliar. It can feel really, really daunting, to be calm, to be present, to be grounded. When you are used to living in survival mode, constantly trying to predict the next thing, the next thing the next thing that might go wrong in order to keep yourself safe. So when it comes to our nervous system familiarity, whether it's helpful or unhelpful, healthy, unhealthy familiarity equals predictability, predictability equals safety because it's survivable. As far as our nervous system is concerned, anything that we've been through what we're the most familiar with, is, and have become the most predictably survivable circumstances because you've done it so often. So when it comes to a nervous system that's used to chaos. Oftentimes, the healing modalities that we tend to be most pulled towards are also modalities of high intensity, things like HIIT training, that's high intensity interval training, hot yoga, CrossFit ice baths. And this is true for my story.
1:59
So in my 20s, when my anxiety was very much alive, and well, I was doing daily CrossFit, I was doing very high volumes and very high intensities of exercise. And what I likely needed to be doing instead was something like yoga, something that was lower intensity. And I definitely did go to a yoga class here there and no one is coming to mind in particular. I remember the rock climbing gym, I was a member at at the time had some yoga classes, which is like pretty typical for rock climbing gyms. And a friend of mine invited me to she was like, Do you want to go take the the 5pm class or whatever, I don't even remember what time it was. I was like, Yeah, sure. So we get there. First of all, I thought it was a like 45 minute class, it ended up being a 75 minute class. And it was a yin yoga class. And so for those of you who don't know, Yin Yoga is a very low intensity, quiet, more contemplative yoga practice where you are spending minutes upon minutes holding the same stretches or passive poses. So anyways, I remember as we're walking out of class, turning to my friend and being like, Well, that was awful. I won't be doing that. Again, it felt like I probably said something like it felt like a waste of time. And the again, the reality is, that is exactly what my nervous system needed, at that point in my healing. But I didn't have the awareness or the context, that something unfamiliar, might feel bad, even when it's what my system needed to balance out the intensity everywhere else in my life. It was unfamiliar stillness. That was exactly what I needed to balance out that chaos.
3:59
But again, I wasn't in a place of understanding that yet. And I think that's what I want today's conversation to support some of you who are listening. He's to give you this context, in this reframe, to just more intentionally assess the modalities of healing that you are pursuing. Because at this time in my life, almost every single hour of my day from 6am to 7pm, was scheduled. And instead of more intensity, with the healthy habits that I was choosing what I needed to be doing was less and healing eventually happened for me when I stepped into that unfamiliar place of less and slower and lower intensity versus what was familiar to me was busyness and intensity. So this is why we often choose people and place These are things that create chaos, or whatever it is that your system is more familiar with. A lot of times I think we refer to it as self sabotage. But your system is just choosing more of what it has predictably survived in the past. Not because we want it, but because our system seeks familiarity.
5:21
So what I want to talk about today is, it's a bit of an echo of what I talked about often, and that is that healing is nuanced. Healing is personal. It is dynamic, based on the seasons of healing that you're in, there might be times when an ice bath or high intensity workouts are exactly what you need. And there may be other times that they completely overload your system, or reinforce and unhelpful familiarity. And this is why it doesn't always matter what the research says, or what new protocol Dr. Huberman puts out there.
5:59
And for those of you who don't know, Dr. Huberman is actually he's a brilliant, he's a brilliant American neuroscientist, and an associate professor of neurobiology and ophthalmology at Stanford University School of Medicine in California. He's also a podcast host, he has a podcast called The Huberman lab, it is a really awesome in depth look at research and what research is saying about human humans and well being and thriving and mental health. He has podcasts on so many different topics, solo podcasts, interview podcasts, he has made, I think science more cool in the last handful of years and more accessible to the masses than it's ever been. And so what I have to say, is not any level of criticism. Because I know a lot of you who found your way here may also be familiar with with his work. It's not a criticism of his work, but more some thoughts on contextualizing it. What he and others and even myself sometimes hear offer, in presenting research and making suggestions on protocols based on that research is too generalized.
7:16
And I mean, I'll share an example. I recently put together a piece of content for my rise membership sharing a recent research review, that showed that exercise can be one and a half times more effective at reducing anxiety and depression symptoms than meds or cognitive behavior therapy. And this same study found that higher intensity, like HIIT, training exercise, intense exercise for shorter bursts was the most effective at reducing symptoms of anxiety and depression. Now, it's really easy to take a study like that and say, Okay, anybody who has depression should be doing shorter bursts of high intensity exercise. And that is what is going to reduce your anxiety symptoms the best.
8:06
And what I want to caveat that with is for you, personally, maybe, but maybe not. And there's other research out there that pretty universally shows benefits to ice baths or cold plunges, not just in mental health outcomes, but it improves immune function, blood pressure, so many things that again, when you understand anxiety, and depression through this nervous system lens, we see that anxiety that overly activated or depression and an overly shut down nervous system is caused by too high of stress load that stress load might come from our physiology, it could come from trauma or psychology, environmental stressors. So we can assume that optimizing our physical health in any way would decrease our overall stress load on the nervous system, therefore improving overall well being. So research shows that ice baths do that I should do ice baths.
9:02
What I am trying to say here is that sometimes it doesn't matter what the research says about a particular intervention, or habit, being more or less effective at reducing symptoms of anxiety and depression, if it's not the right fit for you, or not the right fit for you right now. And so the question becomes, well, how do I know if I should be doing yoga or, you know, an orange theory class? How do I know if I should be doing calming breath work or an ice bath? And I think the way you can best assess whether something is the right fit for you right now is two things. Number one, having a functional understanding of your nervous system. And then number two, learning how to be in conversation with your body. And then through some good old fashioned trial and error while paying attention to how your body is responding to some of these things over time, you can make an informed decision of Yeah, I am noticing that I have a decrease in anxiety symptoms I've been doing, you know, twice a week cold plunges for a month, and I'm feeling really good about it. Or you may say, I've been doing twice a week cold plunges for a few weeks now. And I noticed that on the days I do a cold plunge. I am feeling really, really anxious by the time I go to bed at night, it seems to add stress load.
10:35
I've done a previous episode on exercise induced anxiety, where we get this generic advice that exercise is good for anxiety and depression. And most of the research confirms that and yet, I've worked with so many clients who are like Amanda, I had a panic attack in the middle of my spin class. The minute I start to get my heart rate up on a treadmill, I feel like I'm gonna have a panic attack. But I thought exercise was supposed to decrease my anxiety, why does it seem to be exasperating it? And so again, inviting in permission for what's right for everybody else, whatever the research says, should work, if it feels like it's doing the opposite, or is unhelpful for you. Maybe it sort of just feels a little funky right now, because it's unfamiliar, right? Just like that yin yoga class I went to felt awful. It's exactly what my system needed, but it didn't feel good. Or maybe some of the things that we're doing aren't the right fit right now, no matter how much your health or wellness Instagram guru swears by it.
11:41
So these are the two things that I want to talk a little bit more and move through together in this conversation. Number one, having that functional understanding of your nervous system to filter this healing inquiry around. And then number two, what it looks like to be in conversation with your body and have some good old fashioned trial and error to figure out which healing habits might be the best fit for you to help you move through your healing in a more strategic way. And with more confidence, and I'm gonna sidebar here really quick, because I think this is one of the things that really sets apart our modality of coaching at rises, we what makes it what we hear from our clients, what makes this really different from traditional talk therapy, or life coaching or online courses, or the other ways that they have tried to heal is that we really focus on this strategic healing, peace. recognizing and understanding that the load on your nervous system that's creating your anxiety and depression symptoms is unique. That load is a unique balance of lifestyle, habits, circumstances, past experiences, trauma, environmental versus relational stressors, and so on. In a way that's really unique to you. And so what strategic healing means is that you number one, have to have this functional understanding of your nervous system. But then also have a personal understanding of you not just the nervous system, but your nervous system, that you have a functional understanding of what research says are best practices. But then you can filter those through how your system is responding to those habits, those somatic practices, these different brain based drills that we have our clients to determine the best practices for you. And my aim with these conversations here on this podcast are that I give you as much as I can, to help you step into that exploration and that implementation on your own. I have told you, and I will tell you, I'm not going to gatekeeper there is nothing that I teach inside my one on one coaching programs or inside my membership that I will not or have not freely taught you here on this podcast.
14:08
But what cannot happen in podcast format that can happen inside these coaching containers is the CO regulation that happens in session. Before you can learn to be an effective self regulator. We oftentimes need to first depend on the CO regulation that can come from being in a coaching session with a coach or being held in safe spaces inside a safe community. And that's supported personalized integration. We do this with you. We say hey, alright, you learned about your nervous system. Let's explore yours together. Okay, hey, you learned about the habits that heal. Let's figure out what integrating those into your life looks like now. And for many people, it makes the healing journey so much easier to have some of You're walking beside you, or sitting beside you helping to put these puzzle pieces together. And when you're someone struggling with anxiety or depression, your capacity is lower. It just is your capacity to take action, your capacity to change things, your capacity to see things from a different perspective is just a little bit compromised. And so sometimes having that support can be really, really vital, whether that's with us in our coaching programs, or with your therapist or another coaching container. Having support can be vital to not just knowing better, but actually doing different doing better in your daily life in a way that provides lasting healing.
15:45
So I just want to remind those of you listening that if you are looking for a new way of healing, if you do resonate with a lot of this podcast, and you want support that gives mental and physical health and equal seat at the table, you want a path to healing that feels tangible and personalized and strategic. That is what we specialize in. At rises, we and I will drop a link in the show notes to book a what I promised to be a pressure free discovery call with me. If you'd like to learn more. And when you work with us one on one, just know that we take on only a handful of one on one clients each month so that we can be really intimately in your healing with you.
16:25
All right, let's get back to today's chat on really assessing why things like ice baths or HIIT training or whatever else, some scientist or wellness influencer, even myself might have told you would regulate your nervous system may or may not be the right fit for you. And starting with number one, what I was saying about having this functional understanding of your nervous system, and you get bits and pieces of that in every episode here on this podcast. So the piece that I want to just reiterate today is what I already mentioned, about your nervous system feeling safest with familiarity. So when your nervous system has grown accustomed to chaos, stillness and regulation are unfamiliar, and therefore may not feel safe, at least not at first. And this is why healing isn't all somatic and body based, nor is healing all thinking and talking based. I think in the somatic body based healing world, we can sometimes overly emphasize or assume that if something doesn't feel good, then it must not be good. But what I want to remind you, my personal story with that yoga class is that that's not always the case. If you have been living intensely for a really long time, then things like ice baths. CrossFit, high intensity interval training, or other new intense mental or physical challenges that you may be taking on as part of your lifestyle or your healing might be feeding into the familiarity of chaos. Those things while they might feel physically or mentally uncomfortable in the moment, they might push you. But the question to reflect on is, is that really getting you out of your comfort zone? Or is it moving you deeper into your comfort zone of avoiding stillness and calm?
18:33
So while I know, a really hard CrossFit class pushed me out of my comfort zone physically. What it did was it kept me in the comfort zone of intensity and out of the uncomfortable zone of still and calm, which is what my system desperately needed to find more balance and to recalibrate, to a more regulated state. So your nervous system craves familiar chaos. So what it might be worth reflecting on is to look at the different things you're engaging in on a regular basis and to reflect on and understand that your nervous system craves familiar chaos. That healing happens in unfamiliar safety, stillness, calm presence. And it doesn't have to be either or for most of my clients. It's a measure of both and and this is where having this brain based logical understanding that just because it doesn't feel good doesn't mean that it's not good. This can help you to simultaneously maybe hate that slow Stiliyan class. But also keep going because you know, it's creating more familiarity in your system with slowing down, versus maybe that hot yoga or that intense vinyasa flow class that you tend to default to.
20:04
So number one, just to reiterate is that long term healing is about creating familiarity, around stillness, and safety, or whatever is opposite to your current comfort zone. Because some of you maybe you've been more shut down or depressed. And your comfort zone is in disconnection and an isolation is in immobilization. And so your long term healing may be about creating more familiarity around mobilizing, connecting, reaching out.
20:39
It's also about knowing that our body has basic physiological needs, and ways of responding to things. So for example, you don't get to vote on how much sleep you need. That amount is already determined for you, you don't get a vote on whether movement is good for your mental and physical health, that's already been determined for you. You don't get a vote on whether nasal mouth breathing is better for you. It's already determined that nasal diaphragmatic breathing is the optimal way to breathe based on the fact that you are human. So strategic healing is about having this functional understanding to recognize what your nervous system currently defaults to, and then to intentionally provide experiences that balance that out. If your system is well acquainted with chaos, the path to healing, at least in part lies in the unfamiliar of slowing down, going on walks without multitasking, sitting on your porch without your phone. Or if your system is more acquainted with shut down, the path to healing likely lies in the unfamiliarity, of connection of mobilisation of speaking up, when instead, you usually keep quiet to keep the peace, your nervous system needs to experience that the opposite is in fact survivable, as well.
22:08
And the second thing that I mentioned, was being able to be in conversation with your body enough to know over time, what's helpful or not. And by doing that good old fashioned trial and error, to pay attention to how your nervous system responds to particular things, when you step into this part of strategic healing, it's about stepping into daily and lifestyle habits that nurture the nature of being human. But in doing so, in a personalized way. You need movement, but how much and what kind? And how often? Well, what balances out your current nervous system default state, you need to get better sleep. But how do we do that in a way that acknowledges the current reality of your life.
23:00
And this is something our clients really really love about our approach to is that it is practical and tangible. Each month inside our rise membership, we focus on a new aspect of regulated living, we spend an entire month talking about and focusing on things like decluttering your home, because there's research that correlates that a chaotic environment increases anxiety symptoms, especially in women, we're going to spend a whole month focused on inviting more play into your life a whole month on sleep building habits like taking a daily walk 12 months in a year 12 Different regulated living habits that we step into in a fun and playful way with community support. And this is what I mean, when I've previously said that small changes layered over time are the path towards healing. And in taking on all of these generic things, things like exercise, and nutrition and sleep and all of it through a personalized lens.
24:03
And in this conversation around lifestyle being such a key factor in regulating your nervous system. I'm not de emphasizing that often times there is a time and a place and a need to do this deeper trauma healing work. But what I am saying is that if your daily life is overwhelming and full of habits that hurt, instead of habits that heal habits that continually reinforce familiar chaos, versus slowly help you to build familiarity and a sense of safety around its opposite, then you likely won't have the capacity for that deeper healing work to help you to establish a new baseline.
24:48
So to bring it back to kind of this cheeky question of are ice baths and HIIT workouts hurting or helping your healing? And I don't know are they that's a Question for you to reflect on. Maybe in what ways Yes, in what ways No.
25:05
And this is a really great filter these questions can be a really good filter to ask about anything that you are currently doing, with the hopes of it, facilitating healing. And again, maybe it's not always black and white, because maybe that high intensity workout that you're doing is adding unnecessary intensity to your nervous system, physiologically. But also part of that is maybe you love being there. You love that community. That's where your friends are, it feels fun for you. And so in looking at this concept of strategic healing, you might say, okay, cool, I'm going to keep doing that. And I'm going to acknowledge the both and I want to keep going to that class, because I love that community. And that feels really grounding and important for, for me, my mental health, my physical health. And I recognize that physically, that type of exercise is feeding into my pattern of avoiding stillness, of creating chaos. So I'm also going to make sure that I'm attending, again, yoga class, I promise, this episode is not an ad for you in yoga classes, that was just a fun, kind of funny part of my healing journey that I can reflect on now. Or maybe you decide, okay, in addition to that, I am going to a couple times a week, put on some really relaxing music, and do some downregulating breathwork, or a 15 minute stretch class from YouTube. It's going to feel like it's a waste of time. I'm not going to like how slow I'm moving. But I'm going to know that I'm choosing that and Building Safety around it through this sense of agency and choice. Because I want to be more familiar with that as well.
26:42
Then it's not just about cold plunges or workout classes, you might ask yourself like, Is my weekly hot yoga class hurting or helping my healing? Is talk therapy, or my ceramics class, or CrossFit? Or coaching? or Netflix or meditation? Whatever it is? Is it hurting or helping my healing? In what ways? Yes, in what ways? No? In what ways is it moving me deeper into my comfort zone of avoiding stillness, of intellectualizing my feelings of never being alone? Or of always being alone? And what might the opposite of that look like? And before you can ask those questions, you kind of have to know what your nervous system has grown accustomed to most. Is it chaos, and intensity? Or is it avoidance and solitude isolation? Is it being up in your head and disconnected from your body. So knowing where you are, is really helpful to chart an effective path to getting where you want to.
27:50
And I wanted to have this particular conversation today, because the next series of episodes are going to be about presenting different research supported skills or habits that nurture our nature of being human, and help us to reset and optimize our physiology, therefore helping to heal our psychology. And inside rise as we, we call these are essential eight. So again, these are eight essential research supported lifestyle habits that heal. And these eight essentials are number one, it's interoception, breath, sleep, nutrition, stress management, movement, vagal, toning, and community. And I'm going to start off the series with an episode on the neuroscience of behavior change. I'm not going to share with you research on a ton of different habits that you may want to consider changing in your life without first giving you the foundation of how we change our behavior, and how we change our behavior. through a lens of self compassion through a lens of understanding anxiety and depression through this nervous system lens.
29:10
And as I share with you what the research says, what the guidelines are for human being better, if you will, because I don't want to sugarcoat it either the research is clear, you need to get seven to nine hours of sleep period. You don't get to argue with that. Being in a human body means that you need that for your optimal well being. Now whether that is possible for you or not given your current life circumstances is another question entirely and something that we can work through because there's eight categories of healing that I'm going to share with you. When it's not possible to optimize one. Could it be possible to maybe dial in another a little bit better to make up the difference? Because we're also incredibly adaptable and resilient as human. and beings.
30:01
And so each of these episodes will teach you enough of the science to give you buy into those habits. But then my goal with most of our time together is to offer you just really human suggestions on how you might step into that healing habit in a personalized way. And what I wanted today's conversation to be more than anything was permission to filter all of that science and all of those suggestions that I may make through what is best for you right now. Because the other truth is that you are not going to be able to optimally do it all. In fact, what I do not want you to try to do with this next series of conversations, is to try to overhaul your life change, that happens too quickly, reinforces our need to stay stuck in survival mode, it overwhelms our nervous system. So instead, what I want to invite you to do is week by week, I'll give you new bits of information for you to sit with and say, Is there anything I'd like to do a little differently based on this new understanding that I have. And then what I promise I will do is, after that full series of this essential eight series, I will do an episode that brings it all together, that reflects back and helps you step into regulated living in a personalized way.
31:23
So like I said, next week will be a conversation around the neuroscience of behavior change, and how to step into these new habits that heal in a strategic way that meets you where you are at with the current capacity you have. And then I will have an episode dedicated to being a toolkit for each of our essential aid. Now to sum up today's chat with our three tangible takeaways.
31:50
Number one is that your nervous system will always default to familiar chaos over unfamiliar safety. And the path towards healing means assessing whether the things that you are currently engaging in, either reinforce a familiar avoidance, or invite you to step into the discomfort of experiencing something that is going to balance that nervous system state.
32:19
Number two is that there are non negotiable needs that you have as a human being, things like sleep movement, quality, breath, community, all of the things I've listed, and stepping into habits that nurture that nature of being human, while simultaneously choosing experiences that build familiarity around safety is the path to more regulated living.
32:46
And TAKEAWAY NUMBER THREE, is a reminder to filter all suggestions, even research supported ones, the ones from myself and others, through a personalized lens to find what uniquely works best for you.
33:02
And where I'll end today is just with this thought that I wish, I wish there were like six steps to being anxiety or depression free or a perfect blueprint to regulating your nervous system. But that doesn't exist. And you should be really, really cautious of anyone out there promising you those things or using statements like that. Well, there are some absolute truths to being more optimally human in the ways that you take care of yourself. So much of healing is pesky. And it's nuanced, and it's personalized. And so please, please seek out support from trauma informed individuals who will offer you that who will offer to sit in that pesky, nuanced, personalized space. And if you're not sure if working with us might be the right fit, please reach out, send me an email book, a free consultation call. And what I promise to do is to hear your story and to answer your questions in a totally pressure free way. All right, friends. That's it. Thanks for being here. And I'll see you next week.
34:06
Thanks for listening to another episode of The regulate and rewire podcast. If you enjoyed what you heard today, please subscribe and leave a five star review to help us get these powerful tools out to even more people who need them. And if you yourself are looking for more personalized support and applying what you've learned today, consider joining me inside rise my monthly mental health membership and nervous system healing space or apply for our one on one anxiety and depression coaching program restore. I've shared a link for more information to both in the show notes. Again, thanks so much for being here. And I'll see you next time.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai