Never Diet Again with Max Lowery

How to Drink Alcohol and Lose 20lbs

• Max Lowery

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Can you really enjoy wine and lose weight? Absolutely but not the way you’ve been told.

In this episode of the Never Diet Again podcast, I break down why alcohol itself isn’t the real problem when it comes to weight loss for women over 40, it’s what alcohol does for you emotionally that keeps you stuck.

You’ll discover:

  • Why giving up alcohol isn’t the solution and what actually works
  • How emotional triggers around drinking silently sabotage weight loss
  • My 4-step framework to change your relationship with alcohol without restriction
  • Practical strategies to drink smarter, stay in control, and still get results

If you’ve ever thought, “I want to lose weight, but I don’t want to give up wine,” this episode is going to change everything.

Listen now and learn how to lose weight without sacrificing the life you love.

Watch my The Cravings & Fat-Burning Masterclass:  https://www.neverdietagain.uk/register-podcast

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/max.lowery/

Book a Food Freedom Breakthrough Call: https://www.neverdietagainmethod.uk/book-call-ig


Max Lowery:

Let's be honest, most women I speak to tell me the same thing I want to lose weight, but I don't want to give up wine. And here's the reality you don't have to. Alcohol is not the problem. It's the way that you use it is the problem. In this episode, I'm going to show you how alcohol really affects your body and your weight, why it feels so hard to cut back and, most importantly, how you can still enjoy a drink and lose weight without feeling deprived. So if you've ever thought I know alcohol is holding me back, but I don't want to stop completely this is for you. How do you create a life that allows you to lose weight, eat the foods that you love and sustain the results? Over the last 10 years, I've helped thousands of people do exactly that. I'm Max Lowery. I'm an author, personal trainer and weight loss coach. In this podcast, I'm going to share my top tips and tricks from within my one-on-one coaching program. It's my goal to give you the tools and understanding so that you never diet again. Before I dive into the tips, I want to share my personal story with alcohol, because I haven't always had a healthy relationship with it.

Max Lowery:

I grew up excelling at sport rugby, swimming, athletics I was competing at county and national level. At 13, I won a sports scholarship to one of the top public schools in the country. I was the golden boy. But by the time I was 15 or 16, the pressure of all that sport became too much. I rebelled and instead of chasing medals, I chased alcohol and drugs. I got kicked out of that school, quickly expelled from another, and then spent the next eight years excelling at something else entirely, taking drugs and drinking the most alcohol. I worked in nightclubs. I lived for the party to the extent where my nickname was literally Party Boy. Eventually I found myself in finance, working as a stockbroker, and on the surface this was a great job, but underneath more parties, more alcohol, more drugs, four years of hitting it hard and by then then it was no longer fun. It was a problem. I tried to change, but I failed repeatedly, and that's because I was only looking at the surface. Things only started to change when I looked beneath the surface. I realized alcohol wasn't just a habit. It was part of my identity, my social life and a way of numbing how I really felt about my past. That shift led me to become a personal trainer and then a coach, and it gave me a deep understanding of behavioral change, that same understanding I now use to help my clients.

Max Lowery:

So this episode isn't about telling you to quit alcohol. It's about showing you how to reclaim your relationship with it so you can still enjoy a drink without letting it control you. And here's what I realized Alcohol was never really the problem. It was a symptom of something deeper. What makes it powerful is what it does for you. For me, it helped me escape pressure. It gave me confidence. It numbs uncomfortable feelings.

Max Lowery:

For some of you listening right now it might be the same. Maybe you use alcohol to deal with stress, to take the edge off after a long day, to feel less awkward in social situations or to fit in with friends and not feel judged. So the real issue isn't the drink itself. It's the beliefs, the habits and the emotions underneath it, and this is exactly why so many women I coach struggle to drink less. It is not about willpower. It's about understanding the role alcohol is playing in your life, because until you do that, it's always going to feel like a battle.

Max Lowery:

So let's talk about how alcohol actually impacts weight loss, because this is the part that no one really talks about, there are direct and indirect impacts. First let's talk about the direct impacts. Many of the women I speak to tell me they have a glass of wine most nights. Let's say it's one large glass, that's around 200 calories. Do that five nights a week and you've already added up a thousand calories. That's the equivalent of two extra meals.

Max Lowery:

Now let's look at the weekend Friday night, two glasses of wine, maybe 400 calories. Saturday night, three or four glasses. That's six to 800 calories. And then a couple of cocktails. That's another three to 500 calories easily. So by the end of the week the average woman could easily drink two to 3,000 calories in alcohol. That's the same as eating an extra day and a half worth of food every single week without even realizing it. And remember, those calories don't fill you up, they don't fuel your body and they don't build muscle or give you energy. So when I hear women say I'm doing everything right but the scale isn't moving, this is often the missing piece. You could be eating healthy food all week, you could be exercising and staying active, but if you're drinking 2000 calories in alcohol, it could push you into a surplus and the weight won't come off or you will put on weight.

Max Lowery:

Then we have the indirect consequences. Alcohol messes with your sleep. Poor sleep means more hunger, hormones and less willpower. It ramps up cravings and that's why the morning after you want carbs, sugar and greasy food. It lowers your motivation to exercise. You're not going to go for a long walk or hit the gym after a heavy night. So while the direct calories add up fast, the indirect effects push you to eat more and move less, which means even higher calorie intake and fewer calories burned. That's why alcohol is such a hidden blocker. It doesn't just add calories, it creates the perfect storm that can keep you stuck.

Max Lowery:

So why does alcohol become such a hard habit to break? Because it's not really about the drink, it's about the habit loop it creates. And this is the same loop I see with emotional eating. There's a trigger, a behavior and a reward. You feel stressed, anxious, lonely or bored. That's the trigger. You pour a glass of wine. That's the behavior. You feel a little calmer, a little more confident, maybe more connected to the people around you. That's the reward, and the brain loves the reward, so it learns. Every time you repeat this cycle, the habit gets stronger.

Max Lowery:

But the issue is alcohol is a drug. The more you drink, the more your brain needs and expects that reward. So, over time, one glass doesn't feel like enough, you need more to get the same reward. Just like with emotional eating, one biscuit becomes five. One glass doesn't feel like enough, you need more to get the same reward. Just like with emotional eating, one biscuit becomes five. One glass of wine becomes three. It's exactly the same mechanism. If you want to understand how to stop emotional eating, make sure you check out the Cravings and Fat Loss Masterclass by clicking the link below.

Max Lowery:

Now let's add in society, alcohol is the only drug we have to justify not taking. Say no to a drink and someone will ask what's wrong with you. Friends will encourage you just to have one more. There's pressure to fit in, to be fun and to keep up. If you're the one sipping water, suddenly you're the odd one out. Suddenly you're no fun. So you go along with it, even when you don't want to, and over time it stops being a choice, it becomes automatic. Come home from work, glass of wine, dinner with friends, bottle on the table, celebrations, stress and holidays.

Max Lowery:

Alcohol is tied into every situation and because it's so normalized, you barely question it until one day you realize you don't feel in control anymore. And that's the real danger, not that alcohol is there occasionally, but that it's become the default way to relax, cope and connect. And that's how alcohol becomes so ingrained, a simple habit loop reinforced by society, pressure from friends and years of repetition. But here's the real challenge Even when you know alcohol is holding you back and even when you want to cut it down, breaking free feels almost impossible, because it's not just about the habit anymore, it's about the internal mental blocks that keep pulling you back in. So maybe you've noticed alcohol is holding you back and you want to cut it down, but every time you try it feels impossible.

Max Lowery:

Here's why there are mental blocks that can get in the way, and I'm going to list a few of the big ones that I see. The first block is people pleasing. So many women I work with don't want to upset anyone. They don't want to be judged or feel boring, so they say yes to another drink when deep down they want to say no. The second block is boundaries. If you spent your whole life putting everyone else first, it feels uncomfortable to set limits for yourself. Saying I'm good, I don't want another can feel selfish, even though it's not.

Max Lowery:

The third block is all or nothing thinking. You tell yourself well, I've already had one, so I might as well finish the bottle. The same mindset that shows up with food I've had one biscuit, so screw it, I'll have the whole packet. This keeps you stuck in a cycle of guilt, shame and starting over again on Monday. And then there's your environment. If your friends always drink, if your social life revolves around alcohol, if every event is built around it, then it's very, very difficult. It's like trying to swim upstream. You want to drink less, but you're surrounded by pressure to drink more. And that's why willpower alone never works, because the problem isn't just you, it's the habits, the beliefs, the environments you built around alcohol, and unless you address those, you'll always feel pulled back in.

Max Lowery:

Really quick one for me, guys. I don't run ads on this podcast and I do aim to give you as many high value tips and tricks as I can for free. All I ask in return is that you help me spread the word. That way I can help as many people as I can to never diet again. The way to do that is to rate, review and share this podcast. A review will only take 30 seconds, but it would mean the world to me, but more importantly, it could help change the life of someone else. So let's get practical.

Max Lowery:

If alcohol isn't really the problem, then how can you change your relationship with it? There are two sides to this the internal fixes and the external fixes. First, the internal. This is about understanding yourself and why you drink. One of the most powerful tools here is something called the feelings wheel. Just google the feelings wheel to get access.

Max Lowery:

Most people are terrible at labeling specific emotions. Usually people say big, broad, generic words to describe how they feel like sad, angry or stressed. But the truth is, saying you feel stressed isn't specific enough. Stress is just the surface layer. Underneath you may actually feel out of control, overwhelmed, rejected, lonely or unappreciated, and here's why this matters. The more specific you get about how you actually feel, the more targeted your solution becomes. If you're overwhelmed at work, pouring a glass of wine won't fix the source of the overwhelm, but asking yourself what can I delegate? What conversations do I need to have? What can I take off my plate right now? That actually reduces the overwhelm at the root cause, and when the overwhelm itself is lower, the emotional need to drink reduces. The same applies if you use alcohol to unwind after a hard day, instead of automatically reaching for a glass of wine, ask yourself how else could I unwind? Could it be a yoga class? Could it be catching up with a friend, meditating, journaling, going for a walk? All of these give you the same results relaxing and switching off without the cost that alcohol brings.

Max Lowery:

Another internal fix is to learn how to set boundaries. For people who tend to people please. The thought of saying no and disappointing someone feels unbearable, so you avoid it altogether. But here's the key. You don't have to start with big, dramatic boundaries. Start small. Say no to people you know really well. Build up proof that nothing bad happens when you say no. In fact you'll realize most people don't even care At first. You can even give yourself made up excuses like I've got an early meeting tomorrow or I'm on medication. That means I can't drink, and that's fine at the beginning of your journey. But the goal is to build courage and confidence over time so that you can tell the truth and over time your friends will shift their expectations and it won't be a problem anymore.

Max Lowery:

Another big piece here is social anxiety. The goal isn't to avoid it or to cover it with alcohol, it's to develop something I call a sober confidence. This is one of the most empowering skills you'll ever build the ability to walk into any social situation, stay fully present and not need alcohol as a crutch. At first it's uncomfortable, you'll probably feel awkward, you'll probably think you're terrible at it. But like any skill, the more you practice, the better you get Back. When I was learning this, I would deliberately put myself into social situations where I knew no one, just so I could practice building a sober confidence. I can't tell you how freeing it is when you get to the point where you don't need a drink to feel like yourself.

Max Lowery:

And finally, the most powerful internal shift of all is your identity. When I believed I was party boy, it was impossible to change my habits because everything I did reinforced the identity the late nights, the drugs, the drinking. It wasn't just something I did, it was who I was. And it was only when I started to disassociate from that identity that my behavior changed. I had to let party boy die and that shift was so powerful. My friends noticed it immediately. Even now, years later, they sometimes chant old Max, old Max to try and bring party boy back, but it doesn't work because that person no longer exists. That's the power of identity when you start to see yourself differently, your behavior follows. So all of these internal fixes are about addressing the root causes of overconsumption and lack of control, and most people never do this. They just white knuckle it with willpower and motivation, which never lasts, and then they beat themselves up when it doesn't. So now let's talk about the external shifts that need to happen. These are the practical strategies that can make a big difference in the moment for reducing alcohol intake.

Max Lowery:

Number one use visualization. Most people go into autopilot in social situations. The monkey brain takes over and it's overwhelming. To combat this, I used visualization. I, before a night out, I'd close my eyes and run through how it was going to go. I'd plan how many drinks I'd have, who would I speak to when I'd drink water and what time I would leave. By rehearsing it in my head, I went in prepared instead of reacting in the moment. Number two sip slowly. I used to gulp drinks down, which meant I got out of control fast. So I started challenging myself how long could I make one pint last? I went from five pints in a pub session to sipping one pint slowly. This sounds small, but this is actually one of the most powerful things that you can do. Literally, see how long you can make one drink last and I promise you'll have more control.

Max Lowery:

Number three don't do shots. There is no benefit to drinking shots. They are literally designed to get you drunk as fast as possible, which means your inhibitions disappear instantly. Become the person who simply doesn't do shots. Number four alternate alcoholic with non-alcoholic. Personally, I love sparkling water with fresh lime. It's cold, fizzy, refreshing and ticks many of the boxes. But these days there are endless alcohol-free alternatives that actually taste good.

Max Lowery:

Number five have excuses ready. Pre-decide what you're going to say when friends push you for another drink. It could be I've got a workout in the morning, I'm driving or I'm on medication. These scripts can give you control in the moment. Number six suggest other ways to catch up. You don't have to go to the pub. Meet a friend for a walk, grab a coffee, take a class together. There are so many ways to connect that don't revolve around alcohol. And number seven, probably my favorite the French exit, also known as the Irish goodbye. Leave without saying goodbye. This avoids the pressure, the guilt, the don't go yet conversations. Just slip out and then send a text from the taxi to let your friends know that you're safe.

Max Lowery:

These external shifts gave me control in the moment, but it was the internal work, the feelings, the boundaries, the sober confidence and the identity that made change last. Put them together and you're no longer controlled by alcohol. You're in charge. Alcohol isn't the enemy, but ignoring your relationship with it will keep you stuck. The direct calories add up. The indirect impact ruins your sleep, your cravings, your energy and your confidence. If you don't address the deeper reasons why you drink stress, overwhelm, social pressure, identity then no amount of willpower will ever be enough. But when you do the internal work, when you get specific about your feelings, set boundaries, build a sober confidence and shift your identity, and when you pair that with external strategies like visualization, sipping slowly, having scripts ready and choosing different ways to connect connect that's when everything changes. You stop fighting alcohol, you take back control and you realize you can still enjoy a drink without it ruining your health, your weight or your life.

Max Lowery:

But here's the thing you need to know this work isn't easy. Even our clients, who have a ton of support, accountability, improving systems find it challenging at times, which means if you're trying to figure this out alone, it's no wonder it feels exhausting. If you value your time, your energy, your future, the most efficient way forward is to get help and support from experts who've done this before. That's exactly what we do with our clients every single day. If this episode has hit home for you and you know alcohol is just one piece of a much bigger puzzle the stress, eating, the cravings, the inconsistency then I want to invite you to take the next step Book in for a free food freedom breakthrough call with myself by clicking the link below.

Max Lowery:

On that call below, we'll get under the surface of your habits, your mindset and your relationship with food and alcohol and we'll help you build a personalized plan that actually lasts. You can click that link below to get it booked in. Don't wait around. The sooner you deal with this, the sooner you get your freedom back. Don't be one of those people that has to wait until something serious happens with your physical and mental health before making a change. Thanks for listening today. Hopefully this has been useful. Please do share it with anyone you think will benefit from it.