Spicy Midlife Women: Real Talk, Raw Truth, and Bold Moves for Women Over 40

27. No BS Holiday Survival Guide

• Jules and Michele: Midlife Mentors • Episode 27

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The holidays may be magical… but they can also be a whole lot of madness. From the shopping and decorating to the family expectations, emotional labor, and the pressure to “make it perfect,” this season can leave midlife women exhausted, overwhelmed, and wondering where their peace went.

In this no-BS conversation, Jules and Michele pull back the curtain on what the holidays really feel like for midlife women—and how to survive (and actually enjoy) the season without losing your sanity.

They’re sharing:

✨ Why holiday overwhelm hits harder for women and why it’s NOT your fault
 ✨ The truth about emotional labor, gift shopping, and being the “default” everything
 ✨ How to ditch traditions that drain you (guilt-free!)
 ✨ The art of protecting your energy when everyone wants a piece of you
 ✨ Ways to simplify, set boundaries, and create a season that actually feels joyful
 ✨ Real stories from retail life, mom life, divorced-mom holidays, and shifting family dynamics
 ✨ Why it’s okay to change things up and how to do it without the drama

Whether you’re hosting, traveling, juggling grown kids and aging parents, or managing it all solo, this episode gives you permission to reclaim your peace, do the holidays your way, and stay spicy the whole damn season.

Plus: A nostalgic walk down holiday memory lane, a little midlife wisdom, and a whole lot of laughter.

Are you ready to take your "spiciness" to the next level?!

Connect with Julee & Michele on Instagram @spicy_midlife_women and send a DM about what resonated most during this episode so they can encourage you with steps forward in your own life.

SPEAKER_01:

Hey, all you spicy midlife women out there, Jules and Michelle here from Seattle, Washington. And we are here to share our real life stories and have no BS conversations with all of you about all the shit we deal with, right, Michelle? Daily, daily, daily.

SPEAKER_00:

And that is right, here to help all you midlife women redefine your relationship, ditch those toxic cycles, and reclaim your power one episode at a time.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, girl, so let's get into it. All right, let's do. We are talking today about a no BS holiday survival guide for all us women. Yeah. Because we're all excited about the holidays, but then we get into it and we're like, holy shit, there's so much to do, and so many things pulling us in different directions, right? So I know that it's a magical time for all of us and it's something especially. Yes, okay. Disclaimer though, Michelle's the normal disclaimer. We worked at Nordstrom for 25 years, and so holidays have a very different meaning for us, right? Yeah. Because we had to be up at the crack of dawn early the day after Thanksgiving, and uh, you know, sometimes be there overnight. I did when we were putting in a holiday display.

SPEAKER_00:

All you retail ladies out there, you know what it was like, you know what it is like.

SPEAKER_01:

You wear the cushy shoes because you're on your feet 12, 13 hours a day. Yeah. It was kind of brutal. But at the same time, there were a lot of really cool memories from all of that.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

But at the same time, I completely am happy with not being in retail anymore. Right. Because it it's a world that it's just I'm grateful.

SPEAKER_00:

Every day, yeah, everything's and I don't mean to say innocent, because in all intents and purposes, yes, it's a magical time of year. But this is exactly why we're talking about this because I think it can be somewhat daunting. Like I get anxiety just knowing there's only like what, I don't even know, seven Fridays until Christmas or something like that.

SPEAKER_01:

Really, think about it. That's exactly what's going to happen.

SPEAKER_00:

I know, I know. And and I think because the over well, this is me. I am just going back to for all you ladies that are that time when maybe you have young families or younger families, and there's just so much going on.

SPEAKER_01:

I think it seems like there is a there's a lot of pressure and uh holidays have turned into much of a you know, a situation where you're all about spending money, all about getting the right gifts, all about that kind of stuff. And you know, we've all done that. We tried to keep it as you know normal as we possibly could. We didn't have 80 gifts under the tree for each kid, but who's doing all the shopping a lot of the time? You know, usually the man is in the or the significant other in the relationship shops for you, and then you're the one handling, at least that's how it was in my family.

SPEAKER_00:

I that's how it was for me too. Holy smokes! I would do absolutely all the shopping, the decorating, and the decorating, and the cooking, and the cooking, and the baking, not just everything twice, but yes, and the baking. And we literally all of that, and by the time Christmas came, I was so exhausted. I would literally be up all night Christmas Eve, wrapping the presents and getting everything beautiful and filling the stockings by the chimney with care. Santa didn't come because I was already there.

SPEAKER_01:

Did your kids think Santa really existed? Oh, yeah, did they? Yeah, like for how long? Well, I don't know. I don't know how long, but yeah, they my oldest totally spoiled it for my youngest. And I was like, shut up. Well, I didn't say shut up, but be quiet. Okay, maybe I did say shut up, yeah. Don't screw it up for him, you know, kind of a thing. Yeah, yeah. I have good memories, but at the same time, I felt like it was pretty stressful.

SPEAKER_00:

So good memories, they are good memories, but it's so interesting to look back now at just like listening to you say all that, and you just kept going. And I was like, oh yeah, I did do all show, oh yeah, I did do all the cookie, oh yeah, I did do all the and yeah, the baking and work full-time, and then you're going to the cookie party, like right, there's holiday cookie parties, and there's bunko parties that people have during the holidays. We do Secret Santa's at work. I mean, there's a shit ton of things that come with the holidays, but if you allow it, I mean, there's gonna be all those things, but I think there are ways to go about some of this stuff to where you can still do things, yeah, but it doesn't have to be this giant weight on your shoulders because you can change the way that you do things, at least now, and maybe some of the stuff that we talk about can help people in the throes of all of that madness. Well, they're just stars talking about, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

You have all these wonderful ideas when your kids are little of the things that you will envision, you know, them them waking up on Christmas morning and all the magic. And honestly, that was amazing. And on a side note, there are women that follow us that maybe don't celebrate Christmas, but they might celebrate Hanukkah or they celebrate Kwans or they you know celebrate something else. And so the same thing might apply. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00:

But there are pressures that go along with all of those things. There's dinner parties, there's certain foods to prepare, there's yes, there's time frames of when you do things, there's all of that stuff.

SPEAKER_01:

I found myself over the past several years trying to keep things really simple. And my way of doing that, especially after I got divorced, was really trying to make sure that I had something that connected my kids. And uh you women out there might be in a similar situation. I was blessed enough to be able to take my kids out of the country, really. It was like we went to Mexico or we went to Hawaii, we went to Mexico a few times, but I just got them out. Yeah. And over Christmas Day or over New Year's, and that's not something that I'm able to really do as much now because they're all going in different directions. But at the time, I was like, you know what, we're gonna have experiences, we're not gonna have as many things, we're gonna have time together, and it really did seem like it paid off. I mean, my strategy kind of worked because they're all pretty tight now.

SPEAKER_00:

I think there's a a time and a season for all that too, because I I can remember thinking about I would know people that would do stuff like that earlier on, and I would think it would be so weird to be in like Hawaii for Christmas because it's just so different, right? Yeah, I mean, if they do that, yeah, they they have, but just from the tr traditional stuff that I'm doing, yeah, it would be so different to be in a different place. And but now I think about it and I'd be totally down for that. Yeah, I think it'd be great. And and I think the good thing about that is like you were saying, there's gonna be a time where they're older, like yours were older, so you could take them and you could have this enjoyable experience, and you did it at a time prior to where everybody was now, like now where they're off doing their own thing and going and which I totally expect.

SPEAKER_01:

You know, absolutely and and holidays are different. We were talking about that before we got started recording. It's like holidays are very different than they used to be. It's like the same types of pressures aren't there in the same way unless I put them there. So for example, you know, I would have the decked-out house, I would deck out everything. You know, the tree was the big tall tree, and I had the railings all done, the Christmas cards hung that we got, all this crazy stuff. And I loved it. I absolutely love decorating and getting all that stuff done. Now I don't really give a shit. Yeah. Call it good. I'm good.

SPEAKER_00:

I I think there's gonna be some points that we talk about here, and this is kind of one of them. It's okay to do those things differently and not apologize for it, right? Yeah, it's not like you're saying no, like I don't want to do any of this, you're just doing it differently.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, and there's the expectations from within your family, like extended family, even, to have uh gatherings, you know, like with my dad's side of the family, they this is so weird, but they would determine who was holding the holiday gathering by the first letter of the husband's name. So wherever that fell, you know, and then they started adding in the cousins, and then they started, you know, which was my generation. But yeah, I'm sure there is a method logic. Right. So he was at the end of the alphabet, so the other ones came first. Fulke came first, but then all the other ones. Yeah, yeah. So that's what, and then people would be like, ah, we're bowing out this year, or we're not in town.

SPEAKER_00:

And the hurricanes, how they go in the alphabetical order.

SPEAKER_01:

Is that how they work? Anyway, that's a whole total side note. But no, there was there was uh a responsibility, social responsibility in a lot of ways to hold some of these events, even if you didn't have the space necessarily. So if you're my sister, you love that. You love old you love holding events, you've got a big ass house. She's like, she's like, you know, the person who has the April. Martha Stewart. She is, and she does a really good job with everything that she does. And I'm like, have at it, girl. I will come and I'll bring cookies and I'm good. But even going into the holidays now, we're kind of starting to see where we're not even celebrating some of those things together because we're coordinating around elderly people who are in bed basically at like six o'clock or seven o'clock. So it is very, very different. So, anyway, this episode, you guys, is about really giving yourself permission to reclaim your peace and your energy and the boundaries that you have. Those things are supposed to be guilt-free. We should be living our lives right now in a guilt-free way. Yeah. But depending upon where you're at in your life, that may not be the case. You may be in a place where Michelle and I were, say, 10 years ago, where we're feeling a lot of the societal pressures and we're feeling pressures from our family to do those traditional things that we've always done, but we've got high-powered jobs, or we have jobs that don't really give us the freedom to be able to do some of the things that we have done in the past. But I gotta tell you, online shopping is pretty jamming.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, when you were talking a little bit ago, I was like, Amazon has made that a bit of a job. I am an Amazon. I know.

SPEAKER_01:

Admittedly, even though I kind of can't stand, you know, that's a whole nother thing.

SPEAKER_00:

It's a whole nother thing.

SPEAKER_01:

There's there are those things that but I seem to be, you know, kind of going along with it because it makes my life easier. Right, right. But even just the gifts and things, the thought I'm putting different types of thought into the gifts that I'm providing to my family, like what I'm preparing to do. And it really is more about what I'm I'm really putting thought into it. Whereas before it was like they give you a list.

SPEAKER_00:

I know it's just checking the boxes and getting through it, and yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

But my oldest could tell me when he so vividly remembers we were so adamantly opposed to like video games and stuff like that. So vividly remembers, I think he was 13, maybe 14, getting an Xbox. Yeah like stunned that he had an Xbox.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

And we were kind of like, okay, we're giving in, kind of like giving in with the cell phones, you know, when they turned 13 or whatever. We were giving in, but he remembers it so vividly because he could not believe that we actually did it. Yeah, you know, and but all his friends had them, and so he'd go over to their houses, and I'm like, no, dude, we want you guys to all come over to our house. So we wanted to create that environment where they had the stuff at our house that they would enjoy doing just as much as they would somewhere else because I wanted to keep my eye on them, yeah. Yeah, what was going on with them. So we've got a few key tips, right?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah. So I mean, we've already talked about a couple of them, and so protecting your energy because that really is luxury, especially during those crazy times. Doing things differently and not feeling bad about that. It's it's okay to change it up and get rid of like the guilt feelings that that come that can come with doing some of those things and really focus with the season on focus on the joy because when you're giving up some of those things that might cause you to feel guilty, focus on the reason you're giving them up because it's gonna fill you elsewhere and it's gonna bring you joy and peace.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, I think the holiday season a lot of the time is it's very busy for the sake of being busy.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

And so I look at that, and again, from my own experience and probably from yours and from a lot of women out there, it's like you're not in the moment with the things that you're doing. And so you're going through and like you said, checking boxes on what you got to get done and what needs to be purchased at the grocery store, and what gifts you need to order so they're delivered on time to people that are out of state, and you're really not in the moment. You know, you're so exhausted by the time you get to the holiday party for your husband's Christmas function or whatever, that you're just like you don't even care.

SPEAKER_00:

One of my sons actually he doesn't celebrate the holidays and he is he's Christian, like he totally believes in you know, all the things that surround the Christmas story. And I really actually admire his presence of peace that comes along with not doing that because so much of it has become so commercialized, and a lot of these things that we're talking about is it as a result of the commercialization that has come with the holidays. And I mean, don't get me wrong, people, I have so many traditions, I decorate, I do all the things I do every year, right? But I just share that because I I can see where and he set that boundary with himself, like it and has he been that way his whole no okay.

SPEAKER_01:

So when did that start when he had kids?

SPEAKER_00:

But no, as he got older, yeah, as he got older, and he's pretty much like you know, if you want to do these kinds of things for people, you should be doing them all year round, anytime that that it moves you to do that, so which I I really respect.

SPEAKER_01:

I think about like food banks, yeah. Only time people go crazy banks is at the holiday season. No, it should be. What about the summer and all these things? So that's when people kind of really think about it and are doing food drives and stuff like that, when really people are in need all year round.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

And I don't know. I I think we forget about that sometimes.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, and I think with regard to some of that can be traditions within families, and those can evolve, like they did with my son. You know, he still observes things, but it's been an evolution for him and he does it differently. And I respect that. And we can all do that in some way, shape, or form, uh, whatever it looks like, to have it be what's gonna work with your with you, if it's just you, if it's your family, and you still all come together, what whatever it is. And I think Julie, you were you were talking about a couple years ago a tradition with some kind of family gathering, and it was stressful on who was gonna go, who wasn't gonna go, how are they gonna show up, and all of these things. And some people in the family decided they weren't gonna go, and it was a stressful decision, but they stuck with their boundary. Am I getting the story right? Yeah, and it all it turned out okay, and I'm pretty sure that person felt great about their decision.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, I mean, I guess it depends on how you look at it because as the family's gotten smaller, which I think a lot of us are probably experiencing because the older generations are passing on, or they're just not available in the same way that they were before. So they were doing a lot of the traditional stuff, and so those things get moved on to the next generation. The next generation doesn't have hold the same value with it, and so things like holiday gatherings, instead of being on Christmas Day, like my dad's side of the family, turned into the Saturday before Christmas, and then it turns into where it was just one specific part of the family, but the family's getting so small that I'm like, hey, let's include all the cousins extended. So that's what it is now, but yeah, we're not doing it anymore. We're not getting together anymore.

SPEAKER_00:

And I guess that's one thing that to keep in mind families change, yeah. They they evolve, they evolve, not always growing, but becoming less to your point. And so things might look differently. And however it is, I guess we're talking about it from oh gosh, dare I say the word matriarch? But you know, that we set the tone. Yeah, we set the tone in the family, and there is so much of that that comes from what we do and how we do it, and it really in in some ways is kind of a beautiful thing because we can I mean, we we really have the pulse on how that is going to be, which can be stressful, or whatever it is you're doing to protect your peace, you could just totally pivot and have it be something completely different, but something that everybody loves all at the same time. You never know.

SPEAKER_01:

I think a lot of it though, Michelle, has to do with how people value that time with family too. Because I've noticed, like with my sister's husband, who I adore, as I've mentioned before, has really no interest in spending time with her side of the family, except our immediate family, but extended family. I mean, he's like, I see them once a year. I don't hi, what grade are you in? You know, blah, blah. It's not anything that adds value to his life. Right. Well, and it wouldn't be sincere. Really? Yeah, it would be it's insincere. Or the big joke is because they have the things at their house, is that he comes down the big massive stairs that they have in his bathrobe. So everybody's like, Oh, I guess it's time to go home, you know, because Mark's coming down with his bathrobe on, you know. That's hilarious at these parts. It's good for him for having boundaries. Well, that's his boundary, it's a very passive-aggressive boundary, but it's boundary just the same. Kind of a joke. I joke about it all the time. Because if he did that to me, I'm like, give me a bathrobe too, you know. But he's my brother-in-law, so it's okay. But yeah, I mean, we don't see these people, a lot of these people, yeah, but once a year, maybe twice a year at the very most. And so you have to ask yourself, and then the other thing, too, okay, let me think about this for a second. Families, a lot of them don't get along, and so you know, you're obligated or you feel it's an obligatory thing that you're going to this quote family thing and you freaking hate half the people that are there. You don't get along with them. And it's like you can't pick your family, right? You can pick your friends but you can't pick your family, and so it ends up turning into some argument or people don't talk to each other. It's just stupid. Yeah. People are obligated to do it because they're related somehow, you know. Right. Yeah. Which I would rather just be with my immediate family and just really enjoy the time together than in some place with someone that I don't even remember. 100%, you know.

SPEAKER_00:

100%. Yeah. That that would be my challenge to some of you listeners today. Just think about how we you could do some things different. Like instead of maybe hosting the huge dinner that is typically what it is, maybe it's a light type of brunch. It's just a little bit less, it's something different, it's not so late. It's just different things like that. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01:

I I like that idea. Also, you know, kind of saying there's a lot of functions that come up during the holidays. Yeah. And for all of us that work full-time or have little kids that they're managing during the day, sometimes the thought of putting on the beautiful velvet dress and going to the company Christmas party is really not very appealing. Because then they have to be like social and have small talk and shit like that. And it's like nobody wants to really do that. If I don't know, yeah. I've had cut back on that a lot. You know, there's just not as much opportunity to do that.

SPEAKER_00:

Anybody needs a plus one at their holiday party? I'll be your guest.

SPEAKER_01:

That was Michelle's plus one a couple years ago at her holiday. Because her guy wasn't here, but I so I was I was like the stand-in for her, you know. But our holiday party at work is during the day. Yeah, you know, so it's like it's during the day and it probably goes on into the night, but half the time I'm not even here when it happens, you know. Like this year I'll be gone when it's happening again. So, anyway, just giving yourself permission to feel comfortable with whatever decision you make is really what we're trying to get across because those holidays are very fleeting and they really will create some wonderful memories. But as I'm thinking about, like I was thinking about this last year, it's like, how many more Christmases do I have? It's not like I'm old and like I'm dying tomorrow. I mean, you know, future is planned for you, right? But really, in a big scope of things, if you last till you're 85 years old, you might have 30 Christmases left. Right. That's not that many that you've left for 55 Christmases or 50 Christmases.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, just as fast as the six Fridays will till Christmas this year.

SPEAKER_01:

So you have to try to enjoy all the time that's there and give yourself permission to just let go of the shit that you don't want to do.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

You know, and don't feel like you have to apologize to everybody because you want to do things differently.

SPEAKER_00:

Do what feels good for you. And it might seem different, but just keep in mind that it will create the space for things that matter. And when you are at peace and you have that joy, it's a much more pleasant experience, not only for yourself, but everybody around you as well. When you are that kind of center of that wheel that's making everything go within a household. Yeah. Or even just if it's just you, even with yourself and in your own life. It doesn't have to be this big production, family and kids, and all that. Sometimes it can be that way when it's just you and your partner or just you. And that's okay too.

SPEAKER_01:

I mean, honestly, it's like I've got to the point where I'm like, I don't even want to do anything Christmas Day or Thanksgiving Day or whatever. I just want to be. Yeah, I just really want to be. I don't really want to have any commitments. And then maybe that goes back to my emotional unavailability.

SPEAKER_00:

I'm not really sure, but that's a whole other episode. Yeah, probably. Maybe a series even.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, I'm laughing at myself, but she's kind of half right, right? Do you have some traditions that you carry on that you have done in the past?

SPEAKER_00:

Well, that's so interesting because no, I do, but at the same time, I grew up in a very traditional household, and we did have a lot of traditions, and they have wonderful memories wrapped around them and during the holidays. Is some of them I have carried on within my own family, and we still the certain foods, right? Certain foods, German pancakes, German pancakes that are always a thing. But as far as a lot of the real traditional things, it's pretty different than like turkey, that kind of thing. I mean, like when we had Christmas dinner and everybody's sitting down, everybody's sitting down. Everybody getting dressed up. And I mean, we had a whole I'm we were like the Van Trapp family on the sound of music because there was eight kids. Were you guys all singing? We literally would go Christmas caroling on Christmas Eve. Yes. My mom would record on the tape recorder, she her playing the piano, the Christmas carols, and then we would bring the tape recorder with us. We'd all pile in the station wagon, bring plates of cookies, and go to people's homes and sing in four-part harmony Christmas carols at their front door on Christmas Eve, and leave the cookies. Then we would come home and open our presents on Christmas Eve because we were from a Scandinavian background, and that's how they celebrate. Uh, and then we would have which I actually really like because then you have your presents on Christmas Eve and your Santa Claus stuff in the morning. It's not so overwhelming doing everything.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, some families I can recall going to my so every family is different, right? Going to my cousin's house and we did midnight, we were Catholic, you know, did midnight mass. I'm like, what the hell are you taking these six and seven-year-olds, us eight-year-olds to freaking midnight mass? We're all falling asleep in the eye. It's like, why? Why do we do that? Okay, that's a whole nother question, but whatever. And we would sit on Christmas Eve, and they opened all their gifts on Christmas Eve, and it would be like this frenzy. And we're just kind of sitting there, my sister and I just sitting there, kind of watching, and they're all like going at these things like presents flying and paper flying and all this shit. Nobody knows who's opening what, blah blah. That's I think kind of how people do it. Well, in my house, that was very different. Yeah, we did it one that's how I did it at the time. I love that. That's the uptight way of doing it, which was totally my house.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, yeah, and I probably yes, we're with my kids because we wake up and I would do the German pancakes, and then I'd want to wait till after we eat before we opened it. And they're all just like a holy mom. Can we just like open the presents, please? Yeah, yeah, it's we did it too. That's so funny.

SPEAKER_01:

My parents, like we had maybe two gifts, and that was it. They didn't put anything in the stockings or anything like that. My dad was a big believer. We probably had to work for those two, right? My dad. But my kids was the same thing. It's like we didn't really do a ton of things. We did the stockings, and we always give them something that they could open on Christmas or on Christmas Day so we could sleep a little longer. Yeah, and then they'd have their little gifts, and then we'd have big breakfast and stuff. But it wasn't like this big crazy, like more presents than yeah, you know, God. It's just it's gluttonous, and I don't like that. It's just not me.

SPEAKER_00:

The stockings we where there was always a giant apple. We did that. We always had a big apple and an orange. We so traditional. Really like from the 1920s or something. So traditional. Big apple, big orange, the shelled nuts, oh wow, and the ribbon candy, the hard candy and chocolates, like Jen Xers, they all had. I know that it was so we all had that. And I did the apple and the orange thing with my kids and peanuts for a long time. And then I'm sure eventually they're like, what is up with the apple and orange? It's like my kids have booby.

SPEAKER_01:

Everybody's getting candy and we're getting apples and oranges. You know, anyways, yes. Plenty of traditions happening. Anyway, we're totally getting off the body.

SPEAKER_00:

I know I'm very nostalgic here, but you know, whatever it is that moves you, because I I really am sure that there were plenty of times that my mom wished that she could probably, you know, just like take some time, be to herself, maybe set some boundaries. I think that we've gotten better as time gone has gone on to where we're okay with well, I guess we have the wherewithal. Yeah. And the information to realize one, that we don't have to do it all. And two, there are ways of creating that space for things that matter.

SPEAKER_01:

Of our midlife spiciness, I think. Yeah. Because I love a lot of those things, but they're not always appropriate anymore to do. Right. It just does exactly.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, it it exactly. And so the way you create space for things that matter in you know, earlier midlife, you know, in your 40s, when maybe you do have younger families and things going on and cousins and all that are still getting together, the way that space is created for the things that matter is going to look a bit different. But just know that as time goes on, yeah, you can continue to carry on those types of traditions where you are creating that space so that when you get to a place where your kids are now grown, you actually kind of not lost. Yeah, you're not as lost, and you kind of have a feel for what that looks like, and it's gonna feel even better.

SPEAKER_01:

So just a little word of advice. I'm looking at the camera for all you women out there. I don't give a shit what age you are, you are in the throes of stuff, whether you have kids, whether you don't have kids, whether you're married, whether you're divorced, it doesn't really matter. Yeah, and these years are in front of you. If you celebrate the holidays, great. If you don't, great. But we're saying take the time for yourself because they're we're kind of true testimonies to having not done that, and we're figuring it out now, and it's not fucking selfish to do that. Amen, sister. Yeah, spicy sister, yeah. And we can be spicy and still be loving and caring for family. It's just you're not always putting everybody else first. Yeah, you're finally giving yourself permission to put yourself first, whether it's getting a massage or whether it's sleeping in a little bit more on the morning of Christmas morning, you know, whatever. Give yourself permission to just enjoy yourself and be in the moment.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Because I'm telling you, it's so easy not to be in the moment. It's so easy to not be.

SPEAKER_00:

So on that note, on that note, if you haven't checked us out over on TikTok, you should probably do that because we have a blast there, and it might be somewhat entertaining to check out Spicy Mid Light. She likes to dance over there. We all love to dance. She we think we can dance. So you think you can dance? Yeah, we can dance. Yeah, let me just tell you. So, TikTok is fun. We're on all the social platforms, we have a spicy community that we are in the process of putting together. More to come on that's pretty much almost ready. Yeah, there's gonna be more to come with that, and we would love for all of you to be a part of that. So stay tuned for more and just make it through the holidays, ladies.

SPEAKER_01:

And stay spicy, ladies. You know what? Put that damn Santa hat on and your pasties and stay spicy.

SPEAKER_00:

Well then, okay later. All right, bye.