Stuck in the Comparison Trap? How to Ignite Your Trailblazer Energy!

Like it or hate it, we just can’t help comparing ourselves to others. Whether it be our looks, intelligence, success, or wealth, the comparison trap is real– but especially when it comes to our health.

We know deep down that our bodies are all unique. Yet, that little voice inside nags us, making us believe we should be mirroring someone else's journey. While comparison is completely normal, it's crucial not to let it become a roadblock on your path, leading to a place of despair.

In this episode, I'm here to remind you that your health journey is yours and yours alone. Tune in to find out how to embrace diversity, stay in your lane, and draw inspiration from others–WITHOUT spiraling into something that takes you further away from your goals.


References

Cottage Cheese Pizza Bowl on TikTok


Audio Stamps

00:50 - Dr. Rentea explains when comparing our experiences to other people around us can be helpful and when it becomes damaging.

02:22 - Dr. Rentea explains why it’s natural for our brains to feel “unsafe” when we do something differently to how everyone else around us is doing it.

03:25 - We find out how this concept plays out when it comes to diet culture and getting your body the best results.

04:43 - Dr. Rentea shares what to do if you find yourself in the comparison trap.

06:27 - We learn that we also need to be careful of judging others on a different path to you.


Quotes

“Especially in this area with the anti obesity medications, there's a lot of groupthink going on where one voice gets really loud and then everyone gets influenced by it.” - Matthea Rentea MD

“As humans, we actually feel quite threatened if we're going to go off and do our own thing or do something different than what everyone else around us is doing.” - Matthea Rentea MD

“If you are going to do things in a different way, you need to have some faith and trust in that process.” - Matthea Rentea MD

“You need to look at yourself. You need to cultivate your own values and beliefs. You need to believe things long enough for them to appear physically in your life.” - Matthea Rentea MD

“We can't assume that the path that you're on is perfect for everyone or vice versa.” - Matthea Rentea MD

All of the information on this podcast is for general informational purposes only. Please talk to your physician and medical team about what is right for you. No medical advice is being on this podcast.

If you live in Indiana or Illinois and want to work with doctor Matthea Rentea, you can find out more on www.RenteaClinic.com

Transcript

0:29

Welcome back to another episode of the podcast, like I've been telling all of you recently. I am finding that it is so much more enjoyable here to just talk about scenarios that are just occurring in everyday life that I see with patients. And I find that the more I speak about these, it resonates with everyone because it's sort of this little glimpse into what everyone's experiencing. And today I want to talk about just a very specific scenario, which by the way, it's very core to us as humans how we experience the world, but it's this compare and despair. It's very normal and natural for us to compare our experiences to other people around us. And in some cases, this can be helpful because We can learn a lot from that. Okay, this is my experience. That's their experience. We're comparing the two. If we have a big growth mindset with it, it can be very helpful. All right, we see, okay, interesting. I'm doing or not doing those things. And then If we have a very clear boundary with ourselves that it's not just that we're going to mimic or think that we have to do what this other person's doing, but that we really figure out for ourselves, I always say you renegotiate everything for yourself and you figure out what you do or don't want to do. But a lot of the times I'm seeing that, especially in this area with the anti obesity medications, there's a lot of, sort of group think going on where one voice gets really loud and then everyone gets influenced by it and everyone thinks that they need to do the same thing. And the challenge is our bodies are all unique and we sort of know this in our mind but then we kind of Deep down, I think that we should be having the exact same results as someone else, but we're not doing the same things, we don't have the same genetics, we don't have many things in common, our lives might look very different, and so we just can't sit there and compare, because then we really despair, and then that gets us even further from the things that we want to achieve. So, the only thing I just want to bring up today is that just know that this is natural of your brain, this is normal of your brain, we're very much so Creatures that want to exist in community and in relationship to other people. Most people do not enjoy being secluded and off on their own. Most people crave having friends and having connection and having long term relationships with people around them in whatever capacity it looks like, whether it's a significant other or a platonic relationship or friendships or co workers where you really get that connection when you go to work. Something that I learned a lot about when I did my coach training is that Because we think like that as humans, we actually feel quite threatened if we're going to go off and do our own thing or do something different than what everyone else around us is doing. Sometimes our brain literally thinks, you're not safe. You're literally not going to be safe doing these things. That thought might not occur to you in that way, you're not safe, but it might look something like, well, everyone else is doing that. Why do I think that I can go and do something different? And a lot of the time, the way that we're talking about things on this podcast, it's very not diet culture, right? So diet culture would suggest that you need a rigid calorie number, and you need to have this perfect streak with exercise, and all these things need to be perfectly done. And so if you are going to do things in a different way, You need to have some faith and trust in that process that I'm going to hold out long enough to see if I get the results that I want in a different way. That is often trailblazer energy. Trailblazers are not able to look at others to figure out the way. You need to look to yourself. You need to cultivate your own values and beliefs. You need to believe things long enough for them to appear physically in your life. This sounds very, very out there what we're talking about, but basically what I'm suggesting is that whoever you are deciding, whether that be yourself or whether you have a medical team that's helping you, that you are going to have faith long enough in what they're talking about to see if it works or not. And when you're doing that, You can, often it is not a great move to sit there and compare because it doesn't matter someone else's strategy when for you something entirely different might get your body the best results. And so I, the only thing I want to suggest here is that when you notice yourself getting into this comparing energy to just check yourself, is this helpful if I do it in this way? Is this helping me to know exactly what they're eating and exactly what they're doing? Sometimes it's inspirational. Sometimes I love watching the 24 hour what I eat in a day because it gets my wheels turning. Oh, interesting. I didn't think I could eat a salad in that way or do something in that way. I want to give a little example here recently. I saw a content creator on TikTok. Maybe I can even get the link and we stick on the show notes. Let's see if I can find it again because I think I saved it on TikTok. But she made, and I know I've seen a lot of people do this, but she made a cottage cheese pizza bowl. It just looked amazing. It was like cottage cheese with some red sauce and What did she put in there? Obviously some cheese and I think she put pepperoni, which is something I would leave out. But I thought to myself, oh, yeah, that would be such an easy, great idea. I have all these ingredients in the house. I normally don't put it together in this way and it gave me great ideas. I didn't sit there though and compare to what her weight loss is or that the timings need to look like that with her or all these other things. I took a little teaching out of it and moved on. But if you find you're someone that compares a lot. First of all, just get curious about that. Like, why do I feel the need to do this? Has this worked out well for me in the past? Do I want to do it differently now? Can I maybe just look at these different scenarios but not get to the place of despairing about my own situation? And so again, if we're wanting to step into more trailblazer energy where we're doing things in a non diet culture way and we're getting help that we feel is supportive, but we're not going to compare to all the other people that are on many different walks and journeys. Can it actually get you further? That's my only message for today. Also, the flip side of this compare and despair is also judgment. And I want you to be careful of that as well. So judgment is that you find yourself feeling morally superior the way in which you're doing it. And like, this is the best way and everyone else should know. What I want you to know is you are doing the exact same thing that other people have done to you. In fact, it's, it's usually like a mirroring effect. You're judging yourself a lot. And so you sit there and judge others, but really you're being the hardest on yourself. So I want you to look out for sort of any of these. harsh patterns where you're comparing, you're criticizing, you're just being really tough on everyone and yourself. Can we kind of lighten that load a little bit and help you realize that at this moment, it might be helpful the things that you're doing, but you might in the coming months or 1, years, you might need something different. And so we can't assume that the path that you're on is perfect for everyone or vice versa. I really believe that with this health journey, I always say, stay in your own lane. I view it as sort of like, you're gonna figure out whatever path in the jungle works. All of us are gonna have different, some of us will have a machete, some of us will have a chainsaw, some of us will only have our hands, it'll take us longer to, to, to break the trees down so we can walk the path and navigate it. So stay on your path. Comparison is expected, normal and natural, but let's not let it hold you back and get to the place of despair. And let's not also sit there and judge other people because we don't know. for our cells long term, what's going to be needed. All right. I hope you found this helpful. Again, I really want to encourage you. I am trying to get to over a hundred reviews. I think we are getting closer to that. So if you could please leave a review wherever you listen, that would be absolutely amazing. Talk to you all soon.