
Our Oasis Community
Welcome to Our Oasis Community, the podcast that provides the tools, insights, and community to help you embrace your unique journey toward personal growth and self-discovery. I'm Dr. Roldan, a mental skills coach and therapist. I'm thrilled to be your host on this journey.Our Oasis Community features amazing guests who share their personal stories and practical advice on various topics, including mental health, relationships, career development, and social justice. Together, we create a safe and supportive space for you to learn, grow, and become the best version of yourself. Now, it's important to note that while I am a mental health professional, this podcast is not a substitute for real therapy. Our Oasis Community is simply a fun and educational place to start your journey to a better, brighter future. So, if you're ready to embrace vulnerability and make positive changes, join us on this journey. So, let's be proud, be brave, be loud, and be kind, as we take on this mindful adventure together. Subscribe to Our Oasis Community now, and let's do this together with love and kindness!
Our Oasis Community
The power of being present and self compassion in the Shadow of Invisible Disabilities
As I sat across from Vivi, her voice a soothing balm, we traversed the all-too-common battlegrounds of graduate stress and professional burnout. This episode isn't just talk; it's about handing you the shield and sword of self-care and mindfulness, tools that can defend your mental wellness against the siege of everyday pressures. Together, we peel back the curtain on Vivi's personal self-care rituals, revealing that it's the small, consistent habits that can fortify us against the onslaught of burnout and despair.
Embarking on a journey can be daunting, especially when it's one towards healing and self-discovery.
Takeaways
- Gain self-knowledge and reflect on your values and how you're living your life.
- Make small changes that are doable and sustainable to improve your mental wellness.
- Slow down and be present in each moment, focusing on one thing at a time.
- Both coaching and therapy have their benefits and can be useful in different scenarios.
- Embrace the power of neuroplasticity and the ability to shape your brain and life.
🔔 And if you haven’t subscribed yet, @ouroasiscommunitypodcast
* 6-Month Ethical Mental Health Trauma-Informed Coaching Training
Waitlist: https://mailchi.mp/f8a4df05034a/8h49marbwo
* Free Resources: https://linktr.ee/Our.Oasis.Podcast.Community
* Instagram: @ouroasiscommunitypodcast
Disclaimer: This podcast is for educational purposes only and does not establish a therapeutic relationship. If you need help, please seek a professional therapist or contact a helpline.
Guess Infor:
IG:vivianamindful
Website : https://www.verymindful.com/mindful-living/
Emergency Helplines
- Emergency: 988
- NAMI Helpline: 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) - www.nami.org/help
- National Crisis Text Line: Text HELLO to 741741
- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988 - www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
- National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 - www.thehotline.org
- SAMHSA Helpline: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) - www.samhsa.gov
- LGBT Trevor Project Lifeline: 1-866-488-7386 - www.thetrevorproject.org
- Veterans Crisis Line: 1-800-273-TALK (8255) - www.veteranscrisisline.net
- Ayuda en Español: 1-888-628-9454 - www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/es
- National Deaf Therapy: www.nationaldeaftherapy.com
- BIPOC Therapist Finder:...
Hello beautiful souls and welcome to Oroasis Community Podcast. I am Dr Roldan, your host. I am a doctor in clinical psychology, a BIPOC therapist professor and a mindful somatic coach. While I am a therapist, remember I'm not your therapist. This podcast is not a substitute for professional mental health care, but we have resources in our website and Instagram to support you in that search.
Speaker 1:Join us for a cozy, felt conversation about mental health, personal growth and mindfulness. We explore tools to care for your mind, your body and your soul. Check the footnotes for disclaimer, trigger warnings and additional resources for each one of the episodes. So grab your favorite cup of tea, coffee or hot chocolate, wrap yourself in a warm blanket and find a coffee spot here with us to be kind to be brave, loud and strong in your search of mental health wellness. Welcome to your Oasis, welcome everybody. I hope you grab your cup of tea and a comfy pad, because today I have a guest that is going to put you at so much ease, so much peace. Her voice is so velvety in all the good ways my friend and a colleague, ms Vivi. Welcome to Oasis podcast.
Speaker 2:Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. I've been so excited to chat with you and just sit with you. Ever since I met you, I felt this like connection with us, so I'm happy to be here met you, I felt this like connection with us, so I'm happy to be here.
Speaker 1:And for people that don't know, bibi, can you talk a little bit about you? Kind of this is the five minutes of pump yourself up and let us know who you are for our audience to know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so who I am? That's like a huge question. Where do I start, like? Do I start with what I do or who I am as a person? Maybe all the things, maybe they're all connected. I think I'm a person who's here to help other people. I've always known that, ever since I was little. I just didn't know how it was going to look. But right now it feels like I'm helping people step into more of who they are and accept themselves fully and come to this place of like self-compassion and self-love. So right now I'm I'm enjoying, you know, doing therapy with clients. I'm still training. Right now I do social emotional skills facilitating, so I facilitate those classes. And then I also mentor people on mindfulness. So I facilitate those classes. And then I also mentor people on mindfulness. So I run mindfulness groups, I host meditations and, yeah, just everything around how to have more internal peace, more calm and just how to be more grounded within yourself. I'm also in school and I'm finishing up my master's degree right now, so that's been a long journey, but we're almost there.
Speaker 2:I'm a dog mom, a cat mom, a wife, a friend sister a lot of roles.
Speaker 1:And just to clarify for our audience that is listening over there. So you are in a master's in counseling yes okay.
Speaker 1:So for our audience, I know there is a lot of college students there, or high school or career pivots, um. So just to let you know, we all here I invite different people that from different walks of life, but mostly all of them they have one thing in common, that is, mental health grounding filling your cup instead of emptying it or having holes on it. So, bibi, what can you tell us about? I think it will be because you're young and you're in that process of going through the master program. I think it will be because you're young and you're in that process of going through the master program.
Speaker 1:What kind of tips can you give to protect your mental health going through the programs, especially because, as we know, our mental health system is not perfect? Speaking for anybody that is a lawyer, uh, nurse, doctor, therapist, teacher, anybody that works helping others, uh, there is a burnout rate of 80 percent and out of that 10 people, you have 10 students. Out of those 10 students, they're gonna be eight, and seven they're gonna have suicide ideation due to the product, due to not have tools to relax, to feel their cops. So, since you're in the trenches right now, can one tell us what is traits that you see that you wish that they were not there, or how can you improve them, and what topics or what tools do you use to help you with your mental health?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think the mental health system as a whole like, although they mean well, there's a lot of things that need to shift. And one is like, yeah, the burnout is real, the workload that is placed on students and employees, it's so real. I personally, because I know that there's a lot of lack of time and students, lives and and um, people who are working full time and they're juggling different roles in their lives, time is a big piece where they don't have a lot of. So I said I like to keep it simple and just do little things that will keep me mentally well and physically well and also in interweave it into my life, versus trying to cut out, carve out more time during my day. So, for example, because balancing all the things with work, school and practicum, it's like in a day there might not be enough time to like get my stuff and go to the gym for an hour and then go meditate for another hour and do all these practices that are so time consuming. So that's not just real, that's not realistic in some of our lives, and so I don't push myself or like strive to do that because it's not, it's not possible. So, first of all, just accepting that, with the time that you have.
Speaker 2:What can you do instead of trying to switch things around with the schedule you already have? Can you either replace things Like if you're spending at the end of the night, you know, I don't know doing something else like watching Netflix not that Netflix is bad, it's. I love Netflix and just watching movies and sometimes you do need it and it is a form of self-care but what can you replace it with instead that will fill your cup? What is going to give you a benefit in the long run versus just make you feel good in the moment? How can we do something that does both things for us?
Speaker 2:I think of being mentally well as like a lifestyle versus like a thing you have to do on your to-do list.
Speaker 2:If you have it on your to-do list, you might not get to it because you don't prioritize it.
Speaker 2:There are other things, like being productive, and things that you have to do are going to beat that in order of priority. But if it just becomes the way you live your life, then that's different. Like, how can you live your life where the choices that you make every day are going to be for your mental and physical wellbeing, as simple as like if you're going to the second floor of a building, are you taking the stairs or are you choosing to go up the elevator, like, even though that might seem so minuscule, and like, oh, that doesn't make a difference, but it's like when you move your body, it is good for your mind. We always think of it as good for your body, but it's like when you move your body, it helps clear your mind, it helps you be more connected. So little things like like that, even if you have a minute here and there to just pause and like breathe, can you do that? Can you just be with yourself, can you be with your, in silence, you know, just with yourself.
Speaker 1:So yeah, just little moments, finding the little moments to do what you can so it sounds like in in oasis we learn a stackable skills and a stackable mindfulness. What we mean is exactly what you just said. It's a lifestyle. For example, when you get a pet, you change your lifestyle because now you have a pet, so you modify different things to accommodate the pet. Right For anybody that, due to illness or any kind of disability, you cannot go and exercise or do mindfulness outside.
Speaker 1:Yeah, netflix is a great thing. There is something I mean this is not a sponsor, but I love them Headspace Calm app. You know I take a shower listening to the calm app because I'm doing two at once. Right, I put the rain activity. I mean it feels like I'm really under the rain exercising.
Speaker 1:If you ever did exercise before and for some reason you can't anymore, or for the moment you have to be a little limited you can watch somebody doing dancing, baseball or whatever. Your brain doesn't know the difference. The beautiful thing about the brain is that if it sees it, it perceives it, it makes it a reality. I know it sounds very boo-hoo, but it's true. Just going to sit down in the outside and have a pet plant, nature is always helpful to you to ground yourself. I remember when I was in school, I was like my rule that before any quiz, any test, I will go sit down in this little kind of hill that we have in a school and sit down with a tree, hug the tree for two seconds that was my kind of ritual and go right, because that is what it ground me to that present moment. And one thing that Vivi does great is stay in that present moment being here.
Speaker 1:But where do you learn that? How do you learn that and why? Because we don't come to this realization. I'm going to be mindful today, because it's the beautiful thing unless our parents teach us. But you're Latina too, so that's not why we get taught. We get told hustle, hustle, hustle, hustle, uh, keep working, and after working, keep working right. So where do you learn it? Why do you learn it and how?
Speaker 2:where that that'll be through life experience. Why that would be a whole story, so if you wouldn't't mind, I could go into that. I'm like, of course, the why. The why was mostly because I was doing the opposite and I think, just because society set up that way, where it doesn't prime us to be in the present moment, we're either very future focused and like what are you going to achieve? What are you going to produce? How are you going to get better? Always thinking of doing more and more and more. So that's very future focused.
Speaker 2:And then or we're in the past, like reliving what went wrong, what hurt us, what didn't go the way we wanted to. So we're stuck in one or the other, or both at the same time, and being present comes to like very, very few times. Maybe that time when you're sitting with your pet or your little baby, that's when you become present, but it's harder as a practice. So it just it's like a practice. But the why was because when I was younger, maybe like five years ago so, yeah, I was five, five years ago I got diagnosed with an illness called fibromyalgia, which is chronic pain disorder. Okay, yes, you get me. So at an age of 22, I was like, okay, how did this happen? Like why, why did this happen? So I went through a lot of that like asking why. But then I'm like what if I just stopped asking why and started asking how? Like, how can I shift this? And even though doctors were saying this is uncurable, you will have this for the rest of your life. I'm like, hmm, what if I found other ways to feel better in my own way, to like explore, to be my own like health detective and do things that work for me? So I started off with just like moving my body and eating well, eating better. And then after that I'm like okay, I feel better, but I still feel kind of like anxious or there's something like still striving for more or like this, like restlessness in me. I'm like, what is happening?
Speaker 2:So I first heard about mindfulness through a podcast or I don't remember if it was a podcast or a book somewhere, and I'm like, oh, that sounds easy, like it sounds so easy. Mindfulness is in the present moment. It's so simple. But I'm like, but that sounds easy, like it's so easy. Mindfulness is being the present moment. It's so simple. But I'm like, but actually practicing it moment by moment, it takes work. It's like you have to be intentional every moment to shift your focus from where your mind's at to here, where you're at right now, where your feet are. So it didn't start off that way, but once I heard that I'm like okay, and then it wasn't until I read the book the Power of.
Speaker 2:Now, yes, and I read that as an audio book because my mind could not focus on like reading. I was like, oh, I'm bored, like I don't want to read this, so I had to listen to an audio book. I listened to it twice, like beginning to end, and even though it says kind of like the same thing over and over some people might think it like really ingrains it in different ways in my mind, like every chapter, and so I got really, really intentional to practice it. I'm like, okay, this is going to be a long journey, so the next five years, that's all I did, even though some days were better than others and I was not perfect. I'm still not perfect. It's still like a big value of mine and a goal to remain as present as possible with whatever I have, wherever I'm at. So that was the why, the how, the how is practicing over and over, over and over, and I know the most common way of like being mindful is through meditation.
Speaker 2:But personally, when I was in college and they introduced me to meditation and they went through meditation, I remember I was so anxious and like restless that I was like this is stressing me out instead of like relaxing me. I'm more stressed out because I'm more in my head. I'm like, oh no, I cannot sit. So I asked to go to the restroom. As soon as they started the meditation I'm like, can I leave? And I just stepped out and I came back when it was over. I'm like, okay, good, got to avoid that stressful thing. So for me it wasn't meditation. Now I can meditate.
Speaker 2:But back then I'm like, nope, I started off with little moments. Like you said, outside, just anywhere with nature, anywhere where there's a tree or a plant or something that's alive, another being that's alive in this earth helps you Just looking at a tree outside my window or something, and it's just there, it's not doing anything, it's not trying to go anywhere, it's just being. It's just there, it's not doing anything, it's not trying to go anywhere, it's just being. It's just there. So, starting off with going more into nature, that was the first thing. Like it, especially it's easier when you have a dog, because my dog, I got my dog around that same time. It's like you're forced to go outside and like her for a walk. So that really helped. Like being in the grass and like being in nature.
Speaker 2:Then, little by little, building upon that, like moments, little moments were. Just how can I create a little bit of space within my day to just be present? And it always starts for me my breath, like what, how is my breathing right now? And using my hands and like my body to know where my feet are, looking down on my feet, maybe planting both of them on the ground, and then just looking around like what's around me, what's going on inside my head and in my body, and just being here. But again, again, that takes practice, but yeah.
Speaker 1:And to correlate with you, and cheers to all my hot seat friends and all my fibromyalgia or invisible disabilities, because that's what it is. It's invisible disability that is really hard for people to correlate with, because we look like super healthy, we look okay, and inside we're like want to take our skin off. Um, so, for all of us and for all of you that are listening, I want you to remind you one thing it's okay that we're not okay and it's okay to more in grief the old body that we have with the new body that is almost against us half of the time. For me, it was meditation, the same right. For me, it was meditation, but the same right like I have a rave with squirrels in my hand because I always have ideas and stuff like this is not helpful. This is really really hard.
Speaker 1:And they took me to exploration. Right, I did breath work. I used to hate it breath work. I was like this is not I. I feel like I have asthma again. Yeah, I don't think right, but I learned that sometimes as the practitioner, like I tried different kinds of breath work and I finally find one that was like oh my god, where were you all my life. That it has helped me with pain. In fact, half of my uh clients are chronic pain fine, because you know biofeedback, which is another form of breath and, believe it or not, mine was video games, because I couldn't do a lot of things. Video games were a way to meditate, entertain, and they had video games for mindfulness, for grief, for a lot of different things.
Speaker 1:So for all the youngsters out there, there is other ways. You don't have to crisscross applesauce, be under a tree. No, there is other ways that you, if they're more in your in tune life. But there is things that you can do to be in your own self. And just the warning that I always give is when we stop running around and we sit with ourselves is when a lot of the things come right.
Speaker 1:A lot of the fears, the what ifs, the why me's come, and I hear these quote ones that say you know, when you go to gym, you feel weak before you feel stronger. When you learn a new language, you feel stupid before you are proficient in talking in the language. So when you have mental wellness, it's the same You're going to feel that there's something wrong with you, you're going to feel that you don't know what to do, and that's why we use different resources, such as mentor, coaches, groups. In your case, when you were in those dark moments which all of us, we have been there. When we have a chronic illness or invisible disability, how do you pull out? How do you, how do you climb out of that? What helped you, who helped you, or what resources you recommend?
Speaker 2:you or what resources you recommend? Yeah, definitely when, when I was in the midst of, like, the diagnosis and just experiencing all these like random weird symptoms, I'm like my body is hates me, like and I hate my body and I just want to, like you said, crawl out of my skin and get out and just, you know, escape this. And it was very much so of like resisting that and trying to avoid pain. And that's what created, like the physical symptoms that were happening in my body were creating like a mental chaos, because that pain was just so unbearable that it was creating suffering, but not only physically. Now is just in my head about everything that was going wrong and how nothing was going to help, so a lot of helplessness. It was, um, at one point I remember feeling so bad, like mentally, emotionally and physically, that I was like I just wanna, I wish I could just go to sleep and not wake up. You know, I had that thought and that time I remember I was driving, because I was like I wish I could just like, stop everything, you know, stop and just lay there. And I'm like, oh my gosh, I caught myself, because I still remember the street I was driving on and just everything that was happening. And I'm like I literally just had that thought right now, even though I wasn't suicidal, but I was like I want to. I feel like I want to die Right. So in that moment I was like, oh my gosh, this is real. I think I'm. I think I'm depressed, like I think I'm going through a depression right now. And and yeah, the doctor confirmed was like oh, I think you're depressed and you need this medication. And in that moment I was like I know medication is so helpful for people and I'm all for it.
Speaker 2:But in that moment something was like I don't know if this is the answer for me at this moment. I'm like in this moment my intuition said okay, the prescription has been sent to the pharmacy and if I feel like I need it, I will go get it. But in this moment I feel like I can try to do things to see if I can feel better and if so, then I might not need it. But of course, that option was still open for me. But when I walked out of that doctor's office, I made a commitment to myself to be like you know what, I'm going to try my best and even though it's not going to look perfect. I'm going to do everything that I can to make healing my priority and make healing basically my full-time job, like even though I had other things. I'm like that is going to be my number one, because I want to feel better and I didn't want to be in that dark place that I was in anymore. I was like done you know, being at rock bottom. I'm like it's time. It's time I've been here enough, and slowly.
Speaker 2:That's when I started making really small changes, cause I don't believe of like when I walked out of the doctor's office. It's not like I changed my life drastically and everything changed the next day. It was like slowly, so slowly that maybe day by day it didn't feel like things are making a difference. It probably felt like things were the same. But even a year later I would look back and be like, oh my gosh, I'm not, I'm not where I was. Like look at all this growth. And year by year it just kept getting better and better.
Speaker 2:And what I did personally, I again surrounded myself with people who were supportive. So my husband relied on a lot of my husband, my family. I did go to therapy, I did go to holistic doctors, I did go to acupuncture. I turned to a lot of like podcasts and books like I really wanted to know so much about healing myself and how to feel better, and different modalities, because the ones that I was trying previous to that were not working for me.
Speaker 2:And then going through that grieving process, like you said, was one of the most important things because I had to accept that my body was no longer the body that it once was.
Speaker 2:And, of course, in the moment we go through the same stages of like denial, like no, I don't want this to be the case, and be in it for a while. But then moved on to the next stage. Okay, there's the depression, like I mentioned, that I went through. And then there was kind of like this like bargaining stage of like is it or not? Like I'm not sure, I don't know, confused, and then slowly getting into. Okay, I guess, I guess I have to accept, because if I don't accept, then I'm resisting this and avoiding this pain and it's only creating more suffering within myself. I don't only have the suffering of the pain, but I'm causing myself to emotionally suffer from it. So then I have double the pain. So, yeah, the acceptance, and then slowly, slowly, like with self-compassion practices and with all the tools and support that I mentioned was what got me out of that like hole and the dark place and slowly like moved out yeah, yes and um, just for the audience.
Speaker 1:you know, now we have I know everybody has depending column a, column b, uh, or state uh in favor against medication. That's not what we're saying. We're saying use what it works for you. Uh, knowledge is power. Always, always, check, triple check, with your doctor, with psychiatrists and with your therapist, because your therapist is the one that knows you more when you're working with them.
Speaker 1:Now, thank goodness for the advances of technology. Now we have a genetic test that you can have to see what medications actually you're going to not like at all in your body, and also understanding that when we have complications like pain or chronic pain or any kind of disability, it's a bargain. Right, we are taking one symptom for another and it's a personal choice, but always do it with educational course. The other thing I don't know if you guys noticed that or listened to that, but your therapist, get therapy, yes, super important.
Speaker 1:I always thought, if you go to therapy, please, please, please. It's okay to ask us do you go to therapy? Yes, ask us, because I will always wonder when somebody is not going, or or at least a life coach, a mentor or somebody that is guiding you to a higher level right. Which brings me to second question that a lot of therapists and we're in the bridge right, you and I meaning we are in the world of therapy and in the world of coaching, and for some reason those two don't like each other, or they're always like no, this one or that one is not about choosing your favorite toy, but what do you think about that? Since you navigate both worlds, what do you think one is more useful versus the other, and in what occasions?
Speaker 2:Yeah, honestly, I am up for both. And I Started off with after I had those realizations and things were starting to look brighter and I felt better overall. I'm like I want to help other people go through the same transformation. I want to help people feel better about themselves and their lives and in their bodies and minds. So I went online, as you do, and researched what can I do, like how can I help people? And out came like health coach, like a certification to be a health coach, and I'm like what I had never heard of health coaching before. But the more I researched it and I found that other people were doing it and I'm like this sounds like my dream job. This is like exactly what I've been searching for. And I didn't have to go out and apply and wait so long and pay thousands and thousands of dollars for a degree. So I'm like this is perfect, this is awesome. So I got my health coach certification it was a health and life coach certification and then after that, I started working with clients one-on-one and just helping them change their habits and different areas of their life, coaching them through that. I felt so fulfilled. I felt even online sharing tips, and being a coach to me was wonderful.
Speaker 2:When I was working with my clients, I was noticing that a lot of them were having emotional problems that I would love to talk about, because I just love diving into feelings and your childhood and trauma and all that stuff. But I realized that as a coach, I am not equipped to talk about those things. That is where we draw the line and where we have to say I would love to help you with this, but I am not. Actually I'm not a licensed professional, and this is where you refer out to a therapist, where the therapist is the one that takes over, where you. Your line is drawn Like this is where you can do the rest of the work with that person, and I'm like, darn, I wish I could do that for them.
Speaker 2:Like in me, I was like I love doing this work and I also want to do that. I want to do all of it. I want to be able to not have any exceptions of where I can go and not go with my clients and what I could talk about and not talk about. And I also wasn't familiar with how to treat trauma and those, yeah, just bigger wounds and I'm like, okay, so before, when I got my health care certification, I was like, no, I don't want to be a therapist.
Speaker 2:But then, after that, realizations with my clients, I'm like maybe I do. And then I looked into one of the counseling programs and researched all of it. I'm like, oh my gosh, this sounds now, it sounds aligned. Three years later I was like, yes, this is my next step, of course. So that was like an easy, like process and I think because the universe was like okay, it's time for you to step into this new chapter. It was very easy to just get into the school I applied to and it all worked out. And so now, both of them I see them as both useful in different scenarios, but I ideally for any human, I would say have both. That's just me. I'm like, if you have the resources, if you have the time, if you have the, yes, I would say have both, because they both serve a great purpose and they're both so useful.
Speaker 1:And I love what you just touched. Right now and for our audience, I want you to peel your little ears right now, because, it is true, coaches are to help you to go to a next level or to clean a skill. Sometimes it's the first step that you ask for help there, you know, because they are more available, they look like you, they talk like you or they have that kind of lifestyle that you want to achieve. Go for it. Note of caution if they start touching your trauma, your childhood trauma or anything related with the big T, you don't go there. Why? I'm not saying they are not professionals, I'm not saying that they cannot. But if you hear the story of Vivi and mine in another episode, we are professionals that have gone through many, many, many years of try and error, if you will. Uh, how to treat trauma, because you can get open and it's really hard to get you close right. But the best coaches, the best uh ceos, go-getters or boss babes that you see out there, they have a team, they have their team. I I call it your Justice League. You know you have Superman, you have Wonder Woman, you have all the ones that serve a specific purpose in the fight for something bad, right? So a coach can be the first force.
Speaker 1:In a lot of our countries or in a lot of our communities, we don't have access to therapy, so, which is a very sad thing, but you have your church, you have your leaders that can help you also with caution, right, because they only help you with a specific tool. For example, I will go with Bibi to like, please teach me to be more mindful, right, in my case, not in the clinical, clinical side, but in the coaching side I coach, I coach coaches to how not to cross that line, right, because it's so blurry. And so I coach coaches to not cross that line. And also they come and ask me hey, is this okay or that? Um, also, I do mindfulness too, like I do. I call it mindful skills coach because you know it's a skill like almost working out or mental wellness.
Speaker 1:So, for everybody out there, we are going to put a whole bunch of resources under the podcast notes for Latinos, for females and for mental health, but also we are going to put the information of Vivi. My information is where you want to get in contact. But what is the take out of this conversation that you want our public to get like our audience. You say, like the three keys for mental wellness, or for mindfulness, if you will. What is that you want to let them like? Grab a piece of paper, people, because right now, this is the knowledge, this is the nuggets that you're going to take the jewels?
Speaker 2:Yeah, the three keys. How to narrow it down into just three? Number one, I would say to really get to know yourself as a person and like who you are authentically, what your values are. Just that self-knowledge, be more self-aware of, like, how you're living your life, how you're feeling about your life, how are you feeling in your body, how, how's your mental wellness? Just checking in, like how, take kind of like, kind of like an assessment of your life or reflect on where you are right now and maybe journal on it or get a therapist to be able to get that knowledge. But gain more self-knowledge to know yourself really well and what needs to shift. Know yourself really well and what needs to shift. Once you figure out what needs to shift in your life, start making those little small changes that are doable that you're able to keep doing over and over, because the more you do those little habits, the more it becomes easier and the more it's how you live your life.
Speaker 2:I love the science of neuroplasticity as you are very science person and how it says that our experiences shape our brain. So we already know that the opposite is the case, that when our the way our brain is shaped, you know, shapes our experiences, but now it's been proven that the opposite is also true. So what you're being exposed to every day is literally recreating the neural pathways in your brain, and the more you do something, the more it becomes a habit, the more your brain is like oh, this is just what we do, it's second nature. And so the more you practice mindfulness even though at first it might feel like I don't know what is happening, like this is not working. It is, it is working. It just takes time. And what you need number one virtue, I would say that we're all here to learn on this earth is patience, because we live in a very fast paced world and society and we need to slow down.
Speaker 2:I think another key is to just slow down as much as you can. Of course, there are things we cannot control, like traffic or deadlines from your boss or whatever the case may be. That is, you know, out of our control. But when it comes to things that you can control, how are you choosing to do life? How fast are you moving? Are you eating in a way where, like you're just golfing everything down?
Speaker 2:Can you slow down? Can you be present with your food when you're talking and having a conversation with someone. Are you there with them, or are you thinking about what you're going to say next? Or are you trying to just hurry up the conversation so you could get on with the next thing? Can you just slow down and can you just be there wherever you are in that moment down, and can you just be there wherever you are in that moment, even if there's so many things going on out here, so many things to do. Can you just focus on that one thing for that moment, then go to the next slowly. I don't know how many things I said already, but I'm not sure we got the neuroplasticity.
Speaker 2:Okay, exactly because that. I think that science is what like I'm like, the more like. If everybody would realize this that your brain is shaped by what you do it's like then you could take your power back and be like I am not this person, that this is who I am and that's what it's going to be for the rest of my life, and I just need to accept it and be, you know, be this way forever. No, you could change your brain. You could change your body and your mental health. Your brain will affect your mood and everything. So what you're choosing to do in every moment is literally creating the life you are living right now, and who you want to become is who you are being right now, right? So there's this quote that goes something like you become who you want to be by being who you want to become each day. So if we say it again like you become who you want to be by being who you want to become each day, so can we just be that person right now?
Speaker 1:Oh, beautiful, and I also going to link the episode of neuroplasticity where we call it don't mind your mind, uh, because you know we mind too much. Our mind, uh, our brain, is dedicated for our body, mind and soul. You cannot separate them. They all work together. Granted, we only listen to one. That was so beautiful. Thank you so much for being with us here, and if our audience wants to find you, where we can find you? Uh, can you give us like your instagram or any um location, that way we can go and plug them for you yeah, awesome, um, I'd be, I'd love to connect.
Speaker 2:Um, my instagram is viviana mindful, and then I also have a newsletter on there. So if you go to my instagram, you could just click on the little link on my bio there and, yeah, join my newsletter because I'll send you a mindful living guide how to live more slowly and be more mindful in your everyday.
Speaker 1:Also, if you guys don't know, she has a beautiful journal too. That is over there in the link. I will put all the information in our notes. Once again, thank you so much for everything and, as I told my audience, be well, be care and be brave. Be you, and all parts of you are accepted in this community. Thank you and have a wonderful day.
Speaker 1:As we conclude today's episode, take a moment to reflect. Be proud of the journey, for every step that brings you closer to who you truly are. Embrace the kindness towards yourself, as you did to each one of our guests. Honor the bravery in your actions and celebrate the importance of mental wellness with us. And remember mental wellness with us. And remember it's an exercise that we practice daily. Continue to grow and flourish, knowing that we are in this training for our mental wellness together.
Speaker 1:We are so proud to have you as part of our community, so join us on Instagram at Oasis Community Podcast for more inspiring conversations, valuable resources and supported content, including journals, worksheets and content in Spanish. Exciting things are in the horizon. Oasis Community break rooms are coming soon to grab tools and take a break for your mental health. Also, we are featuring our six-month training ethical mental health coaching program designed for new and experienced coaches, as well as holistic and healing professionals. Enroll to create a safe and transformative experience to your clients. Links in the bio. Until next time, take care, stay connected and welcome to our Oasis community.