Chaos to Calm

Exploring EFT with Catharine Ross: A Game-Changer in Managing Stress, Anxiety and Self-Doubt

October 29, 2023 Sarah McLachlan Episode 26
Exploring EFT with Catharine Ross: A Game-Changer in Managing Stress, Anxiety and Self-Doubt
Chaos to Calm
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Chaos to Calm
Exploring EFT with Catharine Ross: A Game-Changer in Managing Stress, Anxiety and Self-Doubt
Oct 29, 2023 Episode 26
Sarah McLachlan

Imagine dealing with anxiety, stress or overbearing self-doubt and finding a way to navigate it all with grace and resilience. That's exactly what Catherine Ross, an emotional freedom technique (EFT) expert, brings to the table in this enlightening episode of the Chaos to Calm podcast. This conversation takes us on a deep dive into Catherine’s personal journey with EFT, which began at the tender age of 16 and has since transformed her life. Together, we explore the unique ability of EFT, a potent blend of psychotherapy and somatic acupressure point stimulation, to process emotions, honor our needs and set boundaries all without dredging up past traumas.

We continue our journey, learning how EFT can alleviate stress and anxiety, and the role it plays in creating healthier boundaries in our lives. Stress is a common companion as we age, and Catherine shares fascinating insights into how EFT can aid in managing this. We also unpack the idea of toxic positivity and how EFT can help break down subconscious barriers. Plus, Catherine guides us through a tapping technique that anyone can use to combat stress and anxiety.

Finally, we bring light to the power of EFT in facing self-doubt, imposter syndrome, and limited beliefs. Catherine shares her perspective on how EFT can lead us to take charge of our reality and live life by design, not default. For women in their 40s and beyond, we discuss EFT as a tool for managing the chaos of menopause. Catherine’s insights and the simple yet profound techniques she shares are bound to inspire you to live your best life, no matter your age or circumstances. Don't miss out on this engaging episode that promises to be a game-changer in your journey towards emotional freedom.

ABOUT CATHARINE ROSS:
Catharine Ross is an experienced, certified EFT Tapping Practitioner working online with women looking to increase their confidence, supercharge their power and create the life they truly deserve, using this wonderful healing technique. She is also a mum of 2 young girls and loves sharing EFT with the wider community to empower them with a tool that is literally at their fingertips, anytime, for any issue! You can find out more about her work at www.breakfreewitheft.com or follow her at www.facebook.com/breakfreewitheft and @break_free_with_eft 

Send us a question for the FAQs segment or your feedback, we’d love to hear from you.

FREEBIES:

  • Caught in a hormonal storm? The Perimenopause Decoder is the ultimate guide to understanding if perimenopause hormone fluctuations are behind your changing mood, metabolism and energy after 40, what phase of perimenopause you're in and how much longer you may be on this roller coaster for.
  • Been told your blood test results are "normal" or "fine" while you feel far from your best? It's time to dig deeper and uncover the missing piece of the puzzle. Discover the power of optimal blood test analysis with The Blood Test Decoder: Optimal Ranges for Women Over 40.

To connect with Sarah and learn more about her services, visit her website at www.theperimenopausenaturopath.com.au, follow along on Instagram at @theperimenopausenaturopath.

Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Imagine dealing with anxiety, stress or overbearing self-doubt and finding a way to navigate it all with grace and resilience. That's exactly what Catherine Ross, an emotional freedom technique (EFT) expert, brings to the table in this enlightening episode of the Chaos to Calm podcast. This conversation takes us on a deep dive into Catherine’s personal journey with EFT, which began at the tender age of 16 and has since transformed her life. Together, we explore the unique ability of EFT, a potent blend of psychotherapy and somatic acupressure point stimulation, to process emotions, honor our needs and set boundaries all without dredging up past traumas.

We continue our journey, learning how EFT can alleviate stress and anxiety, and the role it plays in creating healthier boundaries in our lives. Stress is a common companion as we age, and Catherine shares fascinating insights into how EFT can aid in managing this. We also unpack the idea of toxic positivity and how EFT can help break down subconscious barriers. Plus, Catherine guides us through a tapping technique that anyone can use to combat stress and anxiety.

Finally, we bring light to the power of EFT in facing self-doubt, imposter syndrome, and limited beliefs. Catherine shares her perspective on how EFT can lead us to take charge of our reality and live life by design, not default. For women in their 40s and beyond, we discuss EFT as a tool for managing the chaos of menopause. Catherine’s insights and the simple yet profound techniques she shares are bound to inspire you to live your best life, no matter your age or circumstances. Don't miss out on this engaging episode that promises to be a game-changer in your journey towards emotional freedom.

ABOUT CATHARINE ROSS:
Catharine Ross is an experienced, certified EFT Tapping Practitioner working online with women looking to increase their confidence, supercharge their power and create the life they truly deserve, using this wonderful healing technique. She is also a mum of 2 young girls and loves sharing EFT with the wider community to empower them with a tool that is literally at their fingertips, anytime, for any issue! You can find out more about her work at www.breakfreewitheft.com or follow her at www.facebook.com/breakfreewitheft and @break_free_with_eft 

Send us a question for the FAQs segment or your feedback, we’d love to hear from you.

FREEBIES:

  • Caught in a hormonal storm? The Perimenopause Decoder is the ultimate guide to understanding if perimenopause hormone fluctuations are behind your changing mood, metabolism and energy after 40, what phase of perimenopause you're in and how much longer you may be on this roller coaster for.
  • Been told your blood test results are "normal" or "fine" while you feel far from your best? It's time to dig deeper and uncover the missing piece of the puzzle. Discover the power of optimal blood test analysis with The Blood Test Decoder: Optimal Ranges for Women Over 40.

To connect with Sarah and learn more about her services, visit her website at www.theperimenopausenaturopath.com.au, follow along on Instagram at @theperimenopausenaturopath.

Sarah McLachlan:

Hey there, I'm Sarah McLachlan. Thanks for joining me on the Chaos to Calm podcast, a podcast designed for women over 40 who think that changing hormones might be messing with their mood, metabolism and energy and want to change that in a healthy, sustainable and permanent way. Each episode will explore topics related to health and wellness for women in their 40s, like what the heck is happening to your hormones, what to do about it with nutrition, lifestyle and stress management, and inspiring conversations with guests sharing their insights and tips on how to live your best life in your 40s and beyond. So if you're feeling like you're in the midst of a hormonal storm and don't want perimenopause to be horrific, then join me on Chaos to Calm, as I share with you how to make it to menopause without it wrecking your relationships and life. Hello and welcome to episode number 27 of Chaos to Calm podcast.

Sarah McLachlan:

I'm Sarah McLaughlin, your host, and I'm so excited today to be welcoming here with me Catherine Ross, who is an emotional freedom technique or tapping expert, and we're going to be talking together all about well tapping, but also things like how to cope with added stressors and anxiety, which is so relevant to life in your 40s and perimenopause, and honoring your needs, setting healthy boundaries and maintaining them and igniting your greater confidence. So, catherine, thanks so much for joining me today here on Chaos to Calm podcast. Could you let's start with you sharing a bit about your personal journey and how you came to discover EFT? And, yeah, start at the beginning. I won't complicate it, I'll just keep it simple.

Catharine Ross:

Yeah, absolutely so. Thank you so much for having me. So I first discovered EFT a long time ago, when I was about probably 16 and my mum being an amazing researcher and, you know, very interested in natural health and complementary therapies, she tried to help me to overcome a lot of different things that I was going through, because I used to be a swimmer, a very high level swimmer, and then when I quit I kind of went through a bit of a depression as well. So I had a bit of trauma or a bit of abuse issues, things like that that I'd been through as a teenager and she had sent me off to so many different therapists, you know, we tried to work through lots of different things from lots of different angles and then she came across tapping and she actually got qualified in it herself so that she could help me. But then I thought, okay, well, you know, you don't necessarily work with your family very often and I thought, well, you know, maybe this is worth exploring a little more. So she sent me to a practitioner and this practitioner was really able to, I guess, uncover what it was that was holding this trauma and this depression and what I was going through in place and when we were able to unravel that, it took such a short period of time for me to find relief that I thought, wow, like there's really something in this, and it was different to any other kind of therapy that I'd come across before, because it wasn't just about talking about your problems and trying to, like you know, overcome them with your thought process, which can be very, very difficult. You know, you can't talk your way out of trauma, and I think what I really liked about it was that it was a mind and body therapy, and I'm somebody who likes some tactile things. I'm not very good at meditating, I can't sit still, and so that that blend of sort of the psychotherapy techniques with the somatic acupressure point stimulation which EFT involves, was very, yeah, appealing to me, and so I got a great amount of relief. I was able to release a lot of weight, anxiety, depression, limiting beliefs, things like that that I'd picked up through my childhood and through my teen years, and I thought, wow, this is an amazing modality. I really want to do something with this. So then I started doing lots of different roles.

Catharine Ross:

When I left school, I did a lot of sales, try to find out what I wanted to do, and I even started a Bachelor of Health Sciences in naturopathy because I thought I really want to help people in a natural space. And then I thought you know what, I'm not very good at sticking at things very long and I thought, oh, I'm going to. You know, I'm going to follow this EFT thing because I had such great results and something else would come up for me and I'd started getting some more support around it and I thought you know what? This is exactly what I want to do. And then I went and got qualified and that was over 12 years ago now. And so I've had my business using EFT, tapping as a certified practitioner for over 12 years, and now it's my absolute passion to share this modality with others.

Sarah McLachlan:

That's amazing, that's such a great journey and I often find, for natural health preckies, we always have a story or a reason that's pushed us down the way that we wanted to go. So, yeah, I think what you said you can't talk your way out of trauma, and I think that's so. It's so true, and and we're often try to, but you know you feel retrick it or it's hard, it's really hard work, and so what I'm hearing, like with the EFT and my own experience in using it, is that we can help process those emotions without having to, you know, really go deep into talking through the event. And the experience again is that that's Right yeah.

Catharine Ross:

So what we're doing in tapping is we're using acupressure points, which has now been proven scientifically to actually exist. So that's the great thing is that we have this, this ability to classify as an anatomical thing. It's not just or it's a physiological thing, it's not just an energetic, you know, concept that I think a lot of people are familiar with. When they think about EFT, we think about explaining it as a disruption in our bodies energy system, which it is. But it's actually, you know, this energy is getting clogged in these certain points which they're able to pinpoint now through science, which is really cool, so they can show that we actually have them, these acupressure points in our body and on our face, upper body, through our whole system.

Catharine Ross:

And so what we're doing with tapping is we're actually stimulating a set of these points that are on the face and upper body, but we're talking about our problems. So it's sort of using aspects of psychotherapy techniques like CBT, exposure therapy, things like that, but with the added benefit of actually stimulating these points at the same time. So when we're doing that and we're talking about our problems, brain scans particularly have actually shown that we're switching off that stress response in the amygdala, which is our stress response center in the brain, so we're able to actually quieten down that fight or flight response that we're sent into and alleviate that stress that we're feeling. And, of course, when we're not in stress, we can see things more clearly, we can Take better actions. We can just see the forest for the trees. You know that that path ahead of us is clear, and so when we are not in stress, everything else flows a lot more as well. So that's basically how it works from a really simple perspective.

Sarah McLachlan:

Yeah, it's awesome. Thank you so much for sharing that, because I know Maybe lots of people have heard about tapping, but there's probably many that haven't, and I will in the show notes. People can pop over and have a look. I'll put Catherine slinks in there too, and I know Catherine has lots of great YouTube videos to talk you through tapping, but also tapping under for different emotions or events or what's happening there as well. How used many of them myself, and so they're really great. Now, what I was picking up, what I want to touch on there as well, as you were talking about and I might be distilling it, make it too simple, but it's almost like we're rewiring or changing that response to those words or that situation when we're tapping. Is that what the matrix re-imprinting? Is that? Because I know you're that, yeah, matrix imprinting practitioner as well, so I don't know much about that though.

Catharine Ross:

Yeah. So matrix re-imprinting is an advanced version of tapping, so it's taking it to a deeper level. And matrix re-imprinting is wonderful because it's like a nice hybrid brand blend of things like in a child work, like a waking hypnosis. It's got the CBT stuff, it's got the Timeline therapy in it, but with added benefit of tapping. And so matrix re-imprinting is really good for getting to the core issue of what's going on.

Catharine Ross:

Looking at you know where these beliefs that we have, if we have limiting beliefs about ourselves or we're really stuck in something, we can actually go and explore where that started and heal from that experience, using tapping to bring the emotional response down at the time with that younger version of ourselves.

Catharine Ross:

And then we re-imprint a new positive belief, because it's never what's happened to us, it's what we make it mean that really counts in our lives as well. And then we go and live out these beliefs through our lives, you know, often without realizing subconscious, yeah. And so when we actually then find out what belief we developed at the time, of trauma or a negative memory for instance Then we are able to re-imprint a more positive, resourceful picture to our brain. And because our brain remembers in feelings and pictures as well. If we change the feelings around that picture and then we change the visuals, we change the whole sensory experience of that. We then change what our brain perceives to be the truth, and so we're therefore cutting off those kind of energetic cores that are yanking us back every time we're triggered, that are started way back there in even childhood and everything as well.

Catharine Ross:

So it's quite powerful, but it's hard enough sometimes to explain basic EFT without going into that Without going into that.

Sarah McLachlan:

Yeah, that's it, I'm quite efficient of going into the matrix there. It is really awesome, though, because you know most of our thoughts, patterns, behaviors, conditioning is formed before we're three, when we can't even, you know, logically rebut that or say that's not true, and then we carry those through, and I see it a lot with my clients as well. As moving into their 40s and 50s and the next phase of life, they're still carrying lots of things with them that makes them keep themselves second, you know, their second, not their primary concern, and has it makes it hard for them to do the things they need to do to focus on themselves and their health, and I guess that ties nicely into my next question there with.

Sarah McLachlan:

Segway there because we wanted to talk about honouring your needs and how important that is, and you know we know that as practitioners as well. But I was interested, catherine, in how you think that ties in or plays a role in your emotional healing and your personal growth as well, and how EFT helps people.

Catharine Ross:

Hmm.

Sarah McLachlan:

Honour their needs.

Catharine Ross:

Absolutely Well. I think you know, even just by booking a session, somebody is honouring their needs, you know, and recognising like hey, I actually need to work on something. But I think the difference between you know what I do and conventional talk therapies, for instance is that and you know positive thinking, because a lot of people you know can adopt a bit of a toxic positivity mindset, you know where they think that they have to feel good and like they can just override what they're feeling and try to like superimpose a better feeling.

Catharine Ross:

But that doesn't really work because our subconscious knows better and our subconscious is always out for safety as well, so it doesn't matter.

Catharine Ross:

You know what we consciously believe. It's our subconscious that rules over 85% of every thought, feeling, you know reaction that we have on a daily basis, and that's what EFT is doing, as we're working with the subconscious as well. So I think that you know, when it comes to honouring our needs, the mere fact that in EFT, so much of what we do is actually about accepting ourselves with the problem, because you know, when we are actually tapping, we're starting off on the side of our hand and we're tapping on what we call the karate chop point, and when we do that, the first thing that we do is in tapping is that we identify what the issue is and then we accept ourselves with it. So we might say something like even though I have all of this anxiety, I love and accept myself anyway, and so I think that you know that's a really great way to honour ourselves, our feelings, our needs, because we're not trying to fight it. We're not trying to say, oh, I'm going to be really happy and positive and everything's fine.

Sarah McLachlan:

I'm calm.

Catharine Ross:

We're going. Hey, I'm giving, you know, acknowledgement to this particular feeling, and often that's all it takes to be able to start letting it go. You know, we're breaking down those barriers and those walls that our subconscious puts up for all these types of reasons, but we never really sit with our feelings and genuinely give them that space to be acknowledged. And when we're acknowledging them, then we're tapping through the points and we're allowing those feelings to actually disperse and to move out of our body and our energy system too.

Sarah McLachlan:

Often tell my kids and my clients as well, it's fine to feel emotions and life is about. You know, it's not all sunshine and lollipops, and there will be times when you feel these what we call bad emotions. Just you know, those more negative ones. But as long as we don't get stuck in them, that's where the problem happens, for sure.

Catharine Ross:

Last like 90 seconds, apparently in the body, and so what we do is we just keep triggering it and we keep thinking about it, and so it really helps to release those emotions, but it also helps to rewire our brain to start, you know, shoving that information down a different highway instead of. This is the way I normally react, and this is what happens, and this is what I think, and then the spiral that I go down it's just chipping away at that, so that we're creating more resourceful, positive pathways for that information in our brain.

Sarah McLachlan:

Yeah, it's really awesome and I like what you were saying there about the subconscious ruling, the roost and and, and I think for you know, in terms of honouring your needs, it's so much easier to do that when you don't have that subconscious patterning going that you're not worth it or you shouldn't do this, or a good mum doesn't put herself first, or you know that's a common narrative as well or we have to martyr ourselves, or any of those things.

Sarah McLachlan:

And that's exactly what we tap on Like even though I'm a martyr, it's okay, yes, I go, you know and such a common theme. Yeah, and and accepting our flaws and imperfections, because it's a human condition, isn't it? None of us are perfect. It's just that we're told that that we should or could be feels impossible much of the time.

Sarah McLachlan:

And so meeting our needs or honouring our own needs even recognising our own needs is is so important and to taking action and moving forward. Can you tell me a bit more about boundaries, because that's something I know you work with a lot and I do too, and for myself and with my clients there as well, I think it's really crucial for your overall wellbeing.

Sarah McLachlan:

I'm trying to remember the quote, and I think it might be Brené Brown, who talks about boundaries being the way I love you and me at the same time. Is that her? I think I can't phrase that probably badly, but I always think about that as well, as because sometimes boundaries have such a negative connotation or people think that they're aggressive. Yeah, yeah, you know, we're conditioned and raised to not be aggressive and not be assertive, or, you know, don't be mean, don't hurt other people's feelings.

Sarah McLachlan:

Yes yes, you know how they choose to respond to your boundaries is not your problem. But I'm wondering here yeah. How would you use AFT or tapping to help people with their boundaries? Or, you know, in relationships and work. You know family life, all of that.

Catharine Ross:

Well, I think, you know, boundaries really are underpinned by belief systems, and that's what's happening is really great because we are able to, you know, tell a different story about our situation, about our reality, about our place in the world, about our feelings and who we are. And so, if we're telling a story that we have to be a people pleaser, for instance which is what you know what a lot of boundary issues are about is people pleasing? And especially as women, we feel like, you know, we need to be enough for everything and everyone all the time, and so we lose sight of, you know, what our energetic boundaries are, what our emotional boundaries are and, essentially, the energetic, you know, maximums for what we will allow other people or how we allow other people to treat us to. So if we've, you know, grown up with a role model parent, for instance, who has not had boundaries, who's just been there for everybody, you know, sacrificed themselves, been a martyr, you know, and then that creates a lot of resentment down the line as well, if they're not getting that back right because they're being constantly taken from their energies, being zapped, and we grow up learning this and picking up on that, and then, you know, inadvertently replicating that scenario down the track as well, until we recognise hey, this doesn't work for us.

Catharine Ross:

So I think that boundary setting is really important and it helps with. You know, tapping helps with that by addressing the beliefs that we hold about ourselves, like things like I'm unworthy or I'm worthless, or I'm unlovable or I'm not good enough or I don't matter, I'm not important. Those kinds of things and I think it's so they're always present as mums as well, no matter what your situation. And you know I've been through lots of different situations being a stay-at-home mum, I've been a working mum, I've been, you know, a breadwinner, while my partner's been a stay-at-home dad. There's been lots of different roles that I've had over the years, but all of them underneath, you know, there has been that belief that needed to be worked on, which was I'm not enough in general.

Catharine Ross:

And I think that you know a lot of boundary setting is difficult when we don't feel that we're enough, because we feel that we always have to work harder. It's like that, you know, duck, gliding along the surface but underneath paddling furiously. And so you know it's so important and it's such a cliche, but you know you must also take care of yourself first before you take care of other people, and so setting healthy boundaries not only shows you know other people how to treat you, but it also sets a tone for the next generation. So if you're a parent, you're showing your kids how to actually honour themselves, honour their space, their energy, their emotions and what they will and won't accept from other people as well.

Sarah McLachlan:

Yeah, it's so important, isn't it? And again, it's like that subconscious being the boss there as well and undoing that, paddling that little bit of space. You know that little voice that sometimes we're not even tuned to or aware of, being there and telling us what we should or shouldn't be doing or why we're not good enough. So many people have such a strong, you know, critic or that you know in a voice that's fine. I imagine tapping would also be spectacular with their as well. And then says it very nicely.

Catharine Ross:

Yes, yes, yes.

Sarah McLachlan:

What I was going to talk about because you touched on it just before about anxiety, and it is something that a lot of women, as they start to move into perimenopause, tell me that it comes up for them and and that's sort of feeling more stressed or overwhelmed with life when they hadn't before, and I know it was something that came up for me as well. It's also, I think, the busiest phase for most women is in their forties and into their fifties as well. You know the demand fast paced world, smartphones with us, everyone can contact us all the time. Yes, I know that tapping is really great to help reduce those feelings of stress and anxiety as well, but I was wondering if you might be able to walk us through a simple tapping technique that they can try.

Catharine Ross:

Absolutely, because I think you know the thing is is that we're constantly triggering ourselves because our brains are trying to cope with like literally billions of bits of information every second, and there's more and more information out there, and so what we even think that we are doing to relax, like, you know, scrolling through Facebook or looking at you know the news is actually just triggering anxiety. So we don't recognize that we even feel that level of anxiety about six out of 10 every day we're operating at. And so, yeah, if we can identify, you know, that feeling that we might have just feeling a little bit stressed, you know, if you have something specific that is stressing you out right now, maybe have a think about that. And in tapping, what we do is we rate the intensity of that emotion or that belief, or that feeling out of 10, first of all, so then we can check back in and re-rate it at the end.

Catharine Ross:

So if there's something that's stressing you out. I just want you guys to think about that for a minute and hold that in your awareness. Rate it out of 10 as to how intense it is. Maybe it's causing a bit of anxiety, something like that. But we're just going to use the really general word of stress, I think, if that's okay, because it might, you know, cover a lot of different things.

Catharine Ross:

But once we've got a number out of 10, what we do is we start on the karate chop point, and the best way to describe that is in karate they break the board with the side of their hand right, and so it's that fleshy part that's on the outside of our palm. And it doesn't matter what side you use. You can use your left side, you can use your right, whichever one makes more sense to you and you just gently tap on the side of the hand with the opposite hand. So you're stimulating that fleshy part on the outside of your palm. And this is where we say that even though and then we accept ourselves with the problem. So when we're thinking about, say, being stressed, we would say like, even though I'm stressed, da, da, da, da, da, right.

Catharine Ross:

So we're using a balancing statement at the end, and we're going to do that twice, and then we're going to go through the rest of the points and just talk about our feelings, right? So the more six things that we keep it, the more specific we are to the issue that we're feeling, the more results we're going to get as well. So I want everybody to maybe just like, take their side of their hand and, if they can tap with the opposite hand, just their four fingers, like that on the side, and if you take a nice deep breath in and out and think about what it is that you're stressing, out, about what's causing you the most stress right now, really connect with that feeling. And then we're going to say out loud even though and you can say that out loud too Sarah.

Sarah McLachlan:

Oh, okay, even though.

Catharine Ross:

I have all of this stress. I have all of this stress and I can feel it in my body and I can feel it in my body. I love and accept myself.

Sarah McLachlan:

I love and accept myself, even though.

Catharine Ross:

I'm feeling so stressed right now. This thing is really stressing me out and I just don't know how to relax.

Sarah McLachlan:

I deeply and completely, I deeply and completely love and accept myself, love and accept myself.

Catharine Ross:

Then we move up to the top of the head, where the flat part is, and you just tap with whichever hand suits and you say all of this stress that I'm feeling.

Catharine Ross:

All of the stress that I'm feeling, then down to where your eyebrow starts on one side and say all of this stress in my body, all of this stress in my body. Then we move to the side of the eye, where the you know where your eyeliner might go out, and you say all this stress that I'm feeling, all this stress that I'm feeling, and then under the eye, where the eye socket bone is, all this stress in my mind all this stress in my mind under the nose, all this stress in my body, all this stress in my body.

Catharine Ross:

Then on the crease of the chin, all this stuff that's stressing me out all this stuff that's stressing me out.

Sarah McLachlan:

And then where gorillas?

Catharine Ross:

beat their chest just on the one side. All this stress that I'm feeling right now.

Sarah McLachlan:

All this stress that I'm feeling right now and then under your arm where your bra strap sits.

Catharine Ross:

I Just don't know how to switch off.

Sarah McLachlan:

I just don't know how to switch off. And then back to the top of the head, all this stress that my body is under, all this stress that my body is under, and back to the eyebrow, I release and let it go.

Catharine Ross:

I.

Sarah McLachlan:

Release and let it go inside of the eye. It's okay for me to let it go.

Catharine Ross:

It's okay for me to let it go under the eye. It's safe for me to relax now. It's safe for me to relax now under the nose, I wonder if I could perceive this stress differently.

Sarah McLachlan:

I wonder if I could perceive this stress differently.

Catharine Ross:

On the chin release and let it go.

Sarah McLachlan:

Release and let it go Then on the collarbone all the stress that I'm feeling. All the stress that I'm feeling.

Catharine Ross:

And the arm.

Sarah McLachlan:

It's safe for me to relax now.

Catharine Ross:

It's safe for me to relax now, okay, and then we take nice deep breath in and out. Then we re-rate the intensity. So we're going to bring up the emotion, bring up the event, the thing that's stressing us out, and re-rate the intensity out of 10. And so ideally we want obviously that intensity to be coming down. So that was a really, really quick round.

Catharine Ross:

But what you want to be doing is kind of repeating that maybe two or three times, just so that you're actually allowing your body to let go and you're giving yourself subconscious that sort of motivation, right, because the more safe that we feel, the more we're able to let go of what it is that's going on for us as well. So it's really important to actually address the negative before we start trying to tap in the positives, because we're then like relaxing our subconscious's resistance to allowing in that more positive, affirmative statement as well. So that's why we do focus on the negative. We're not embedding it. We're literally like saying, hey, this is the truth, but it's okay to actually let it go and it's okay to feel something different. And so we focus on reducing the intensity of the negative and then tapping in some positives as well.

Sarah McLachlan:

That's great.

Sarah McLachlan:

Thank you so much, catherine, and I guess the power of podcasts is people can rewind and do that two or three times and then, as I said, they can go to the show notes and find you there if they do want to go deeper into something or explore the matrix re-imprinting as well, or, you know, try one of your other videos and things there as well. It is really great and I think what I've heard you say before the great thing about tapping is like you can do it in the car, obviously not if you're driving, but if you're sitting at the traffic lights or if you feel something come up, you could go to the I don't know, go to the bathroom at work or anything like that, and just you know tap wherever, whenever, really.

Catharine Ross:

Absolutely, and I use it with kids as well, and you know I have kids who show their classmates how to tap when they are stressed, and they'll sit there, even in like a test situation or an exam room, and you can literally just tap on your karate, chop, point and breathe. You know, if you're in that stress situation because your body is already tuned into what it is that's going on and that's just a really good way to start, you know, helping your body to process these emotions, and so it's really the people's method, because it can be used for literally any emotion, any issue, any time, anywhere, and it's literally at your fingertips, which is my favourite part.

Sarah McLachlan:

Yes, and they're all always with us, which is great. Yeah, that's. I didn't know that about. You know, in the immediate stressful situation, that's fantastic. That would help lots of listeners, kids and teens, I'm sure. Coming into year 12 exam time, bosh yes, absolutely.

Catharine Ross:

If I'd had that, that would have made such a difference for me, I think I know, I don't think.

Sarah McLachlan:

I just remember how stressed I used to feel in grade 12. And yeah, and how draining and depleting it is on that young growing body and mind Absolutely Having a tool like tapping for them. And it's the same for us going through perimenopause. Our brains are being rewired too, so what a great opportunity to rewire with more positive. Positive Thoughts and patterns there as well.

Catharine Ross:

Exactly, and I think it just helps to adjust to, you know, different changes that we go through in our lives and you know most of my clients are the perimenopausal or menopausal and you know it can just be such a paving sort of time and to be able to find something that can help you to self-regulate and find that more even keel and balance through, you know, whatever body and physical and emotional changes you're going through, I think is really beneficial.

Sarah McLachlan:

Yeah, well, I think all of the things that we've talked about today, you know, with a reason. I suppose they're common issues there as well. And the other thing that can happen in this phase of life is we can start to feel quite invisible. And you know we live in a society that does value women, as you know pretty, for being beautiful or whatever, and our reproductive capacity. So as that change again, that subconscious thought can be there and but you know you can notice people paying less attention to you. So I think you know using tapping sounds wonderful for getting to that subconscious voice and helping to prioritize yourself and your boundaries and dealing with that extra stress and anxiety. But also you could use it to build confidence or belief in yourself. Do you have you used tap? That's probably a silly question. You probably have. Can you tell us a story about someone that you've used tapping with and that's helped transform their self-confidence and self-belief?

Catharine Ross:

Well, I think it's so hard to pick one specifically, because I think people find more confidence when they find more emotional self-regulation in general.

Catharine Ross:

It's not like you're just swinging from one rollercoaster to the next, and I think that that does really help support their confidence and their self-belief.

Catharine Ross:

But, you know, I work with so many business owners and so many, you know, perimenopausal or menopausal age and they are sort of at a crossroads and so many have held themselves back from being able to actually, you know, go out there and put themselves out there as well, because of self-doubt, imposter syndrome.

Catharine Ross:

You know, who do I think I am, who am I to do this, that and the other?

Catharine Ross:

So, by actually, you know, looking at their presenting feelings and working on those, obviously, because that's what we can do in tapping is whatever's going on right now we can work on, but also tracing it back to, you know, where these beliefs that are underneath those emotions come from and resolving them at the core through matrix, free imprinting, has been able to allow these people to actually, you know, just burst through all of that self-doubt so that they can actually shine and show up as the person that they want to in business, and when they do that, they are, you know, feeling more empowered and they feel like they can make an impact and you know, then everything flows so much better.

Catharine Ross:

And so I've seen so many clients who have really just boosted their whole confidence, their self-esteem, their self-belief through literally just tapping away that self-doubt and those inner voices and the critics and the limited beliefs and everything as well, and they've gone on to be really really successful practitioners and business owners. So I'm always so proud to see them just get out there and shine and start receiving what they so truly deserve.

Sarah McLachlan:

That's amazing, isn't it? It's so good. It must be, yeah, really satisfying to help people in that way, I'm sure, but yeah, just to help them find their purpose. Because it is like you were saying, it is a really a crossroads at this time, and we are saying goodbye to one aspect of life and fertility and reproduction, but also opening up a vast you know, because we live for longer as humans and less people dependent on us as mums. If our children are getting older and they don't need us so much, the world is our oyster, so to speak, and except for that inner voice or that critic happening there.

Catharine Ross:

So, yeah, and I think it's like just empowering you to realise that you actually can change your reality, that you are in control of your reality and to be able to influence that, as opposed to feeling like a sitting duck, you know, just waiting for the next to happen. You can just pay a charge and yeah.

Sarah McLachlan:

Yeah, it's really that you know, focusing on life is happening for me rather than life is happening to me, which I get, can be a very triggering concept for many people. That used to trigger me a lot until I did a lot of work to realise that most situations I can turn around and take a learning from and and you know I have had some serious stressors and and traumatic events happen in my lifetime. So it's not like I'm sitting from a position of never having anything bad happen to me to be able to say that. But even you know, tapping on that would be amazing and saying you know, check, turning that around for yourself, that concept of life happening for you, and that you get to choose how you respond to it, how we respond, what we're doing, that it's okay for us to want to do things differently or not want to do things as well.

Catharine Ross:

Exactly, and I've worked with the deepest trauma that you could possibly ever imagine, and you know, these people are still able to find some kind of a learning and some kind of you know a thing to lift them through, that and carry them through, that can be used, you know, to build their character and to build that sense of self and and inner resources that we so truly need to in order to get through life. And so if they can do that, then we can overcome, you know, whatever happens to us on a daily basis as well and a bit of life for ourselves and also the generation you know, or generations after us.

Sarah McLachlan:

I know it's, I think it's you know a lot. It's deep learning for many of us, because emotional intelligence is not something that you learn. We learned at school. I know it's different these days. I'm at home school, so my children aren't in that system to know for sure. But, as I understand it, many schools are trying to work on helping children connect in with their emotions and and do it, but depends on what they've inherited as well and what's going on at home. So I think it is really important work for us yes, you know, on many levels for our children, for our grandchildren, for the women around us as well to work on it.

Catharine Ross:

Absolutely. I'm starting to like where schools as well, which is really exciting. So, you know, taking it in the grassroots level and, yeah, this tool for life, which is brilliant.

Sarah McLachlan:

It is and that's the thing and it can help really be preventative care, because, you know, so much comes up in our body if we're not dealing with the emotions and the thing coming on, we're suppressing, pushing it down.

Sarah McLachlan:

It's when we buffer with food or alcohol or drugs or other things. But also our bodies want to let us know that things are out of balance and it will just come up in another way, in a different area of the body or a different symptom, if we don't process and deal with that, as you know. So yeah, thank you so much, catherine, for your time today. We're like we've covered lots of ground and I love that tapping example that you've given us and I'm sure my listeners will find that really useful there as well. You know, if I was summarizing in two sentences or less, I would say that tapping is an amazing tool to get to the root of what's underlying, what's holding you back, and really addressing things at a deep level without having to go super deep and uncomfortable into talking through things. Any final thoughts from you or comments or anything else you wanted to say before we finish up?

Catharine Ross:

No, I just think you know, if you have something that's going on, try tapping on it, because you know tapping is just amazing for all types of emotional, but also physical issues as well. So, yeah, there's really no end to its applications, and that's the beauty of it is, it's just an amazing tool for literally anything that you need to fix in your life as well.

Sarah McLachlan:

Very great, thank you again, catherine. And yeah, it doesn't.

Sarah McLachlan:

You've got literally nothing to lose because it doesn't cost you anything if you know to try it, and all you've got is the benefit, potentially there as well so thank you so much for sharing your time with us today and helping us learn more about tapping and how we can use it not just in this phase of life, but any time of life and to help our children as well. It's been, yeah, really informative and valuable for me, so I know my listeners will love it too.

Catharine Ross:

Thank you.

Sarah McLachlan:

It's really common for women over 40 to experience the chaos of changing hormones, mood, metabolism and energy. But I hope you know now that common doesn't have to equal normal for you or them. You can help others understand they aren't alone in feeling this way and that, perry, menopause doesn't have to be horrific, by subscribing, leaving a review and sharing this podcast with other women in their 40s and beyond. Thanks so much for listening and sharing your time with me today in this chaos to calm conversation.

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