Imposter Syndrome Thinks You’re The Intern; You’re Actually The Boss

We share the messy path from dorm room despair to building a holistic wellness platform and the daily tools that keep imposter syndrome in check. Naming emotions, auditing friendships, and celebrating small wins become practical ways to reclaim power and momentum.

• Defining imposter syndrome as doubt despite evidence
• Tagging emotions to reduce shame and spark action
• Healing as a decision and ongoing practice
• Inner child awareness and states of consciousness
• Panic kits and sensory tools for anxiety
• The receipts folder for proof and resilience
• Community and friendship audits to elevate growth
• Separating facts from feelings under stress
• Small celebration rituals to reinforce progress
• Guidance for college transitions and comparison culture

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Chapters

• 0:00 Season Nine Mandate: Real Healing
• 1:01 Introducing The Fortify Wellness App
• 2:02 Old Soul Meets Gen Z Energy
• 2:49 Naming Imposter Syndrome
• 3:34 From Dorm Room Despair To Launch
• 5:18 Healing Is Not A Destination
• 7:04 Shifting From Victim To Agency
• 9:10 Inner Child, States Of Consciousness
• 11:21 Tagging Emotions To Take Power Back
• 13:10 College Anxiety And Belonging
• 16:07 Comparison Culture And Social Media
• 18:10 Panic Kits And Sensory Tools
• 19:30 Build Your Receipts Folder
• 21:05 Community Audit And Elevation
• 22:33 Separate Fact From Feeling
• 24:00 Celebrate Small Wins
• 25:05 Mantras, Resilience, And Next Steps
• 26:10 Launch Details And Listener Calls

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

You're listening to the Fortify Wellness Podcast. I'm Bettina Mahoney, founder, survivor, and honestly, your unlicensed emotional support friend. Season 9 is here, and we're not doing surface level conversation. This is for anyone who's ever ugly cried at 3 a.m. Spiraled in their own head, questioned everything, and still got up the next day. We're diving into healing that actually slaps. Mind, body, and soul. No fake positivity, no just journal it out advice. We're talking raw stories that kind that make you go, oh wow. Yep, same. And expert gems that actually help. And listen, we're leveling up. We've got conversations with voices. We're literally changing the game. Quick disclaimer: this isn't therapy or medical advice. It's real talk. Lived experience and tools you can steal to rebuild your life. So buckle up. Season nine starts now. Subscribe, log in, and let's get fortified. Look, you guys know I've been through it. I struggled to find help that actually felt like help. Therapy here, coaching there, fitness apps everywhere. It was just a mess. So I built the thing I wish existed when I was struggling. It's called the Fortify Wellness App, a 360 holistic platform that pulls it all together. Talk therapy, coaching, fitness, and meditation on one subscription. No bouncing between five logins, no where do I even start? Think of it as a giant group hug for the version of you that's finally ready to try. The messy version, the healing version, the I want my life back version. We're live October 19th. It's happening, and I cannot wait for you to feel this. Go to www.we F O R T I F Y Wellness.com to join the wait list and subscribe to this podcast. Whatever you need to do, but let's never give up and let's get fortified. You guys, I don't do many solo podcast episodes. I kind of want to do more of those because I have a lot of fun talking to you guys, you college goer, Gen Z, corporation, you know, millennial gin zenial. Is it a Gen Zenial? I don't even know. I feel like, you know, on the outside, I look like I'm a Gen Zier. On the inside, I feel like an old soul. Like I feel like I could be my grandmother on the inside. Whatever generation that is, is that the quote unquote greatest generation? I don't even know. But I feel like an old soul on the inside. Okay. So let's be real. Sometimes I feel a lot of impostor in my own life. Okay. Like, am I running a wellness company? You know, hosting a podcast, and still Googling like what's imposter syndrome at 2 a.m. Okay. So we're gonna talk about a lot of different things today. We're gonna talk about, you know, what your brain does, you know, that story in your head that tells you you're not good enough. We're gonna talk stories. We're gonna talk real talk, raw talk about mental health, and some like practical tools that come from my own experience. I am not a psychologist, I'm not a medical doctor to help me fight through my imposter syndrome. Okay. So that we're in a really cool place in Fortify Wellness because I've spent so much time like building this platform, building this app from nothing. Like I'm talking nothing, an idea to know, oh my goodness, we're launching. Okay. And, you know, I didn't know what I didn't know in the beginning. I didn't know that this would be such a huge endeavor. I just really came from a place where I really wanted to help people. I knew what it felt like to literally not be able to get out of bed in the morning and then go from not being able to get out of bed to okay, I'm ready to move to New York. I'm ready to do my thing and build my company. Like there were a lot of steps in between those. Okay. But I remember what it felt like to literally have to go like what Mel Robbins does 3, 2, 1, sit up out of bed. Get up out of bed. 3, 2, 1, walk to the bathroom, brush your teeth. 3, 2, 1, go get dressed. 3, 2, 1, go to the car. That was my life. I couldn't see past the next hour. I was a college student. And, you know, I didn't think it was gonna get better. I just kind of went through life aimlessly. I did my homework, but I was really, really unhappy. I was super depressed. I didn't realize at the time that I was struggling with PTSD and depression and anxiety, um, and just like utter despair, um, which is a different level of hurt. And I didn't know how to tag those emotions. I didn't know where to go. Like, like we talk about the wellness industry being so saturated. That's amazing. But when you are in turmoil, like when you are struggling and you don't know where to go, it doesn't help that you have a Google search. It doesn't help that there's like a million therapy apps. You need help and you need it now. And I just felt like no one understood my pain. Like I was sitting on these therapy couches and no one got it. And I remember wanting to help people. Like I remember thinking, even in the midst of my despair, like when I get through it, when I walk over the bridge, walk at the top of the mountain, that I really want to help people. And to think that we went from that girl that couldn't get out of bed to now going on a university tour when we launch in October is insane. And I feel so much pride in going specifically to universities. It just feels like a full circle moment because that's where this idea started in my dorm room, really dealing with a lot of stuff. And to be able to go back to various universities and to basically say, like to these students, like, hey, it's gonna be okay. Help is on the way, and you can do this because I did it and I didn't think I could. So, you know, not every day is easy, okay. Uh you know, and I don't play video games, so this is a really weird analogy that I continue to give, but like healing is like playing a video game, okay? The skills that took you to level two isn't gonna take you to level 10. And so I really want us to think about this. Like, healing is not a destination. Healing in self-care isn't getting a Dunkin' Coffee, it isn't getting a matcha. I'm sorry, it's not going shopping, it's not ordering from Amazon. Like, I'm I apologize for that, but that's not the case. True healing happened for me. And again, this is my per like, I am not a doctor, this is my personal experience. When I was ready to say to myself, to commit to myself and say, I love you, Betina, and I want you to live a better life. This is not how I want to live anymore. You kind of have to get sick of yourself and you have to make this verbal commitment in your head and go, okay, I need to do better. This is not how I want to live my life. And when you start getting sick of yourself and you make the commitment, even if you don't believe it yet, to go, I love yourself. You deserve better. You show up differently. As soon as I committed to that statement, and it's such a basic statement, but it's so powerful. As soon as I committed to that, I showed up differently. And I have an amazing soul coach, I have an amazing therapist, I work out, I have my tool sets, I know what I need. Um, and if you want to hear some of my little quick uh go-tos for when I'm feeling stressed, listen to the Kelsey Dura episode because we go through our panic attack kits and what we do. But truly, I feel like when I had my soul coach and she would really challenge me, she would really challenge me on my beliefs to a point where it really annoyed me. Like she, we would, we, I would get really angry, but it started to shift the way that I viewed myself. It started to shift the way that I viewed trauma because I realized I would get really frustrated when someone would say to me, Oh, wow, like I like I'm so sorry to hear about that thing that happened to you. I would get so annoyed because I'm like, okay, I'm over it. Like, that was the old me. This is separate. I'm building an app, and this is a like, it's not the same thing. And she had said something to me that really spoke to me, and it's super powerful. And I use this language a lot now. And when people say, I'm sorry, trigger warning, that you were raped. I say, Thank you. I am no longer in that victim consciousness anymore. And I learned something really powerful. Like moment to moment, we are in a different state of consciousness. Okay. Like who we were at nine years old is not the same person that we are today. And I talk a lot of about the podcast. Um, within the podcast, I asked this like super earthy, crunchy question of like, okay, what, like, what age is your inner child? Um, and some people look at me like, are you good, girl? Like, are you okay? And some people really get into it with me. And my inner child is the three-year-old that used to wear leopard pants in her head that was just so fearless. And sometimes she comes out in me. You know, the inner voice, the quote unquote imposter syndrome, when I am preparing to launch a product like this one, which is a very big deal for so many reasons. I take it very seriously. That inner child speaks to me sometimes and is like really scared. Like, do you have everything set? Like, are you okay? Can you do this? Is it gonna be okay? Did you check everything off the list? And like, even though I know I did, I still have that inner child speaking to me, going, Are you sure? Because we're scared. And so Bettina that's on level 12 versus Bettina that's on level one, we're in different states of consciousness, and yet the inner child comes out and talks to me a lot. And I have to go, we got it, little b. We got it. Um, and it's such a powerful thing to be able to be aware. And I think that's what shifted in me because I okay, I didn't know this, but when Kelsey and I spoke on the last episode, she mentioned that like Geminis, I'm a Gemini. The Geminis really like to know all of the facts to be able to make an assessment, which is so me to my core. I'm not usually a zodiac girly, but it really is me to my core because I need to know like a 360, I have to know all the facts and then be able to analyze and analyze and just marinate on it. So that's what that was like for me. So when I learned how to cope and like how to tag certain feelings and emotions, it made me feel empowered. It's such an empowered feeling. And I know you ladies, you Gen Zers that are listening, you also like to feel empowered and stand up for yourself and speak your mind. And that's exactly what healing is. Once you get the education, the knowledge, which is my goal through Fortify, you can go, oh, okay. Like I can tag that as depression. That's okay. I know it comes in waves. I have these tools. I'm gonna take the tool out and I'm gonna use it and I'm gonna know that it's not gonna last forever. It's okay. I'm not the only one. And when I learned that, it just changed everything for me. I remember for the longest time, and I did mention this as well in Kelsey Durra's episode, that I just I would have moments where I would feel really depressed. And I was so annoyed by that. You know, like I didn't want to say the word that I was depressed because if you recall earlier in this conversation, I associate depression or I used to with the person, the version of me that couldn't get out of bed in the morning. And so when my soul coach would, you know, I would describe how I was feeling with my uh anxious, cleaning, like literally on my knees, scrubbing the floor. Okay. Like, and she's like, are we ready to say that you're feeling depressed? Maybe. And um, I'm just like, no, I am not depressed because I got out of bed today and I'm not like who I was back then. And she's like, no, you don't have to be. So what I learned is that once I said out loud, I'm depressed, you know, stubborn me finally was like, you know what? I'm scrubbing the floors, I'm feeling a little anxious, and I'm very sad. Guess what? You know what, girl, I think you're right. I'm feeling depressed. And as soon as I use that word, it took the power away. I'm like, you know what? I was feeling depressed on Tuesday, Wednesday's a new day. Let's make it a good day. And it's just that's what it is. It's it's it's a wave. Emotions are a wave. And I learned from my own experience that once I was able to tag it, it took the power away. It's no longer like this dark cloud over my head. So, you know, it's so normal to feel the feelings, and you know, all of our social media, it's just we're taught to just go, okay, I gotta be this like clean girl aesthetic. I gotta go to the gym, drink my matcha, and da-da-da. Eat my greens. Sometimes it's just a little bit more interior, internal. It's not even about the clean girl aesthetic. Sometimes it's just about going, I love you. I love you. It works for me. As soon as I committed to going, I love you, then I it just I showed up differently. I stopped accepting behavior that just did not align with who I was, right? So look, imposter symptoms, super, super normal. It it just doubting your skills despite evidence that you're capable. You know, all the time, I am nervous and scared. And so, as you're, you know, whether you're a college student starting off your semester, congrats, carpetm, by the way, or you're a Gen Zier in the corporate world or a millennial. Look, here's the deal: your track record has shown you that you have gotten up every single morning and survived, right? Like if you're listening, you're alive, okay, and you have overcome every obstacle up to this day. Why wouldn't you be able to overcome future obstacles? You can, you know, this is normal for everybody, okay? High achievers, creatives, founders, college students, women, Gen Z, millennials, men, unicorns, everybody, because life is hard. Okay. And up to 70% of people experience it. You know, it's like being at a party where everyone's dancing and you're convinced they're all secretly choreographers from So You Think You Can Dance. It's gonna be okay. Just trust yourself, believe in yourself. What's your mantra? I want you to think about what your mantra is. What is your mantra when that little inner child voice comes into your head? You know, there's so much connection in my experience between imposter syndrome to anxiety to burnout to comparison culture. Social media does not help with that. Okay. You know, college students, you just went back to school, you just went back to university or college. And, you know, there's so many stressors that come into play when you are dealing, you know, you're leaving, you're leaving home, you're leaving a familiar, safe space, or that we hope, and you go to college and university. And you're like, oh my goodness. If you're a freshman, I saw all over social media, you're like, is this gonna get better? I'm alone, I don't have friends. Yes, it will get better. It will get better. It will get better. Go talk to, like, go knock on a door. Go say hi. Leave your door open, people will come, walk by, and you'll say hi. I think I've told this story so many times, but I had so much social anxiety, like so much. Um, when I was in college, I remember the first week of college when everyone, you know, it's sort of like an orientation week. There were a lot of like gatherings and and clubs, like club hangouts and club signups, and just a bunch of different things going on on campus. And I was just like not having any of it. And I just stayed in and did my homework. And then I remember one Saturday night on the first week, my dad calls and he's like, So, are you having fun? And I'm like, Yeah, totally. And he just was like, You're doing your homework, aren't you? I'm like, Yeah. He's like, I will pay you. Go out, be normal. And I do regret that. Like, I regret, like, I've said this to some of my interns, and this might be unpopular advice. Um, so take it with a grain of salt. But look, you're gonna have your whole life to work, and it's important. Believe me, I love work. I miss homework. I say this all the time. I miss homework. I miss writing a paper, a research paper. Don't forget to be a kid too. Don't don't forget to have fun. Okay. Enjoy your life. It's gonna be okay. Yes, finals are, you know, we're doing a talk in December at a university in New York, and and it's gonna be final season. Everyone's gonna be stressed, but guess what? It's gonna be okay. And and we're gonna take it back to our conversation about imposter syndrome. You have overcome and done really well on your exams to get you into a point where you're in a top university in New York City. Look where you are. You are meant to be there. You can do it. You will study, you have the skill sets, you have the muscle memory, you have the confidence, you will do it. Don't allow for that inner voice to get in your head and go, oh, they're not gonna like me. Ugh, I'm not gonna pass the task. Ugh, this is gonna be hard. Enjoy the journey. Enjoy every day. Life is a blessing, it really is. And it's so normal to feel stressed and nervous about going, especially as a freshman, going back to college or university and just being a like very nervous about, you know, who you're gonna meet for friends and if you're gonna fit in and about school and about internships and da-da-da. But don't worry because it's gonna be okay. You're gonna like, you know, Instagram is basically like imposter syndrome's playground, you know, it's hard, like, especially, you know, it social media has its place, it can build community, but it can also be like our worst nightmares because we're comparing ourselves. And honestly, like the most authentic thing I saw when everyone was going back to college is just like some freshman going, like, I have no friends, I'm scared. It's gonna be okay. And and on the founder side, you see one founder posting their series A announcement, and suddenly you're like, Well, my little project is trash. Not really, but you know, it's like it never ends, there's always gonna be comparisons, and so your job is to take care of you and have that mantra in your head to go, I got this, I can do this. Don't listen to the inner child that's making you scared. So I talked about this again in the Kelsey Jara episode. You gotta listen to it. It's one of my favorites. I mean, I love all of them. Like we've done, I think over 80 episodes at this point, but that one was great. It was great. You gotta listen to it. But so we talked about like panic attack kits. And so basically, it's like having a little kit that you can access in any part of your home or even like to take with you portable that helps you when you're feeling anxious or overwhelmed, and one of those things actually. Because I love smells, smells really help my mood. So you have to listen to it. I'm not gonna tell you because I want you to listen to it, but I have like different um just coping, the very like physical items that help me when I'm feeling stressed. But here's what I'm thinking. Here, here's what I want you to think about. I want you to create a receipts folder. Okay, write yourself a letter. Keep compliments. If you get a compliment over a text, screenshot it, print it out. Do people use printers these days? What are the cool kids doing? I don't know. Write it out, do something, keep it. Okay, screenshots. If there's a photo of yourself that you absolutely love, take a screen, like print it out, put it in a put it in a folder. Anytime you've heard anything that's positive about you, compliment, you love it, it makes you feel good. A special quote, print it out, put it in a booklet, okay, or put it in your notes folder on your phone, whatever it is, but make it easily accessible so that when you're feeling down, you can look at it. When you're feeling imposter syndrome about college or your corporate job, guess what? Go here, go to the receipts folder and remind and remind yourself why you're that B, right? While you're that girl that can overcome it because you're good enough, you're strong enough, and say it out loud. Okay, when I was talking about depression, I mentioned when I said the word, it took the power away. Name the imposter syndrome, talk to the inner child, tell her it's gonna be okay, and then it loses its power, the voice in your head. Community check. Here's another tip community check. Surround yourself with people that elevate you. As again, as soon as I said to myself, I love you, Betina. I took out it's I think I heard someone told me this. This is not something I came up with. It might have been Kim Perel, maybe. I think it was her. She does a friendship audit. So obviously we've heard of tax audits. We love tax season, but there's a friendship audit where she analyzes like who is bringing, who is bringing, who's elevating me? Who are the people that are elevating me? We should be around people that make us better. We shouldn't be the smartest person in the room. Who is elevating me? Who's bringing me down? We love those people. We hope you eat, just not at our table anymore. If you're bringing us down, if you're not elevating us, it's so important. You become who you surround yourself with. Okay. Here's another tip separate fact from feeling. And this can really help you when the imposter syndrome's coming up, okay, go to the receipts folder. Okay. Tagging the feeling versus the emotion. Tagging the reality versus the emotion. What is reality versus what's the emotion? What can I control? What am I feeling? And from there, I think it's really helpful to just go, okay, I'm feeling depressed. I'm not getting any work done. I need to take a break. I need to go for a walk. Know what you really connect with, whether it's journaling, meditation, going for a workout, going for a walk, seeing, you know, the beautiful, it's about to be fall, like seeing the foliage soon. Treat your wins like the big ones. Small celebration practice. Okay. When I, this is very small, but this makes me happy. It's a tiny little thing that makes me happy. When I closed on a couple of deals recently, I went out and I got myself a pumpkin spice coffee. Okay. I don't usually allow myself to get two coffees a day because it's just too much caffeine. Okay. But I have said, you know what? Twist my arm, girl. Let's get another pumpkin. Okay. I love I love fall season. It's my favorite. So if you're listening and feeling like you don't belong, I want you to know that you do, that it's going to get better. And maybe, maybe like the fact that you even care is proof that you're in the right room. We're in this together. We're our own little community that is going to get through every hard time. And we're going to just push that imposter aside because guess what? You have survived every day leading up to today, and you will survive the future days. So I hope you connected with this episode. Comment. I'd love to hear where you stand in imposter syndrome and tips that you have for overcoming obstacles and adversity and pushing the imposter aside. I'd love to hear about your receipts folder. What did you add into the receipts folder? What do you want to celebrate? Subscribe. Share this episode if you feel like you have a friend that could connect with this. And friends, if if you were sent this by a friend, it means that they love you. And I am so excited. October 19th, we are dropping our app. We're dropping it. So go pick it up. Um, it's gonna be available October 19th on iOS and Android. Woo! I can't believe it. And you know, we're here, we're here together. Fortify your wellness inside and out, and we're gonna take on the world together. Also, comment if you have a guest that you really want to hear. I'd love to hear what your thoughts are. Okay, love you guys. Bye. Thank you for listening to the Fortify Wellness Pod, where we empower mind, body, and soul to reach new heights. Your well-being is your greatest strength. Nurture it, honor it, and watch yourself thrive. If today's episode inspired you, subscribe, share your thoughts in the comments, and come back next week for more insights to elevate your journey. Stay empowered, stay true, and remember you're not alone. This is a Fortify Wellness production, all rights reserved 2025.