Ep. 69 - Investing in Your Future Self with Kathy Washburn

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If you were a stock today, would you buy shares of yourself? Kathy closes out the first quarter of 2026 with a practical, powerful reset that moves you from self-awareness toward self-advocacy. You will walk through a clear list of daily investments that raise the value of your life over time, from walking and sleep to values and negative self-talk. This episode is a gentle but direct invitation to stop building everyone else’s life and start investing in the person you are becoming.

Topics Discussed:

• investing in your future self
• self-awareness to self-advocacy
• values discovery and identity change
• emotional suppression and the body keeps score
• negative self-talk and self-compassion
• habit change from the inside out
• daily walking for mental health
• sleep and grief healing

View extended shownotes here

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Until next time — keep investing in yourself. It is always, always worth it.

#SpreadMadLove

Transcript

 Ep. 69 - Investing in Your Future Self with Kathy Washburn

Ep. 69 - Investing in Your Future Self with Kathy Washburn

[00:00:00] ​

[00:00:48] Welcome and Theme

[00:00:48] Kathy Washburn: Welcome to the Self Investment Project. I'm Kathy Washburn, your host, and we are closing out the first quarter of 2026 where [00:01:00] you may realize it, maybe not if you've been following, but we've been tracing a path from self-awareness. To where we are going to go in the second quarter, which is self-advocacy.

[00:01:12] Kathy Washburn: These are kind of subliminal themes that I've mapped out for the year. So we're gonna end this fourth quarter with a few solo episodes, and today we're asking the question, if you were a stock, would you buy shares of yourself? So before we get started, if you're new here, welcome, hit follow.

[00:01:36] Kathy Washburn: So you never miss an episode. And if you've been here a while, thank you. I am so grateful for your gift of time. So let's invest in you. 

[00:01:48] Would You Buy You

[00:01:48] Kathy Washburn: The question, if you were a stock, would you buy shares of yourself? 

[00:01:55] Buenos Aires Leap

[00:01:55] Kathy Washburn: In 2019, I did something that seemed a bit reckless. I lived in Buenos Aires for a month in a six bedroom house, built in 1898 among six strangers from around the world.

[00:02:12] Kathy Washburn: We had the shared language of English, thank goodness but we had no shared history, just a shared willingness to answer a call to embrace the unknown. The program called unsettled. Changed my life. And there were many things that happened in Buenos Aries that I could say attributed to this. But one of the things that I wanna talk about is what happened on the first evening.

[00:02:43] Kathy Washburn: That moment where we were all invited to gather on the roof deck of the house. It was a. Stunning evening. The sky was just brilliant with color, and there was this anticipation, this nervousness of, oh my [00:03:00] God, how, what am I doing here? But we all sat down. People were delightful. Just a little chatter, nervous chatter.

[00:03:07] Tracing Your Choices

[00:03:07] Kathy Washburn: And then our guide invited us to close our eyes and trace how we'd arrived. Not just to Argentina to this moment, but she walked us backwards through every choice, starting with how we arrived at the, at the house, the flight that brought us there, the packing that we did in our hometown, back to filling out the application to be part of the program.

[00:03:41] Kathy Washburn: Back to what was happening in our lives that made us say yes. I had never once paused to reflect on the hundreds of small choices that had collectively led me somewhere remarkable. Each one [00:04:00] had seemed insignificant in the moment, but together they literally change everything. Interesting, right. Have you ever taken a moment to reflect on how you got here to this moment?

[00:04:15] Kathy Washburn: Here's of, in an invitation, take a moment right now to look around at your life, not your to-do list, not the calendar, your life, where you've been, what you've built, who you've become. There's so much beauty there,

[00:04:37] Kathy Washburn: and if you're willing to look, honestly, there's also something worth questioning. Is this who I am or is this who I've became?

[00:04:50] When Life Feels Muted

[00:04:50] Kathy Washburn: When I chose Buenos es, my life felt muted, colorless. That was the reflection I was [00:05:00] having during that little meditation. I had retired from 25 years in the investment industry. I'd been divorced for two years. My sons were launched, and I realized with a clarity that was equal, parts liberating and terrifying.

[00:05:19] Kathy Washburn: I actually had no idea who I was. 

[00:05:23] Self Neglect and Body

[00:05:23] Kathy Washburn: Many of us build our lives around others generously, lovingly, and with real devotion. But somewhere in all that devoted building, we leave ourselves out of the blueprint. Dr. Lydia Tamock, whose research I've explored right here on this podcast, it's actually the first episode.

[00:05:49] Kathy Washburn: She found that years of self neglect show up physically. Dr. Gabor mate, who echoed her work much later says [00:06:00] that when we suppress our own needs in service of others, the body eventually carries what the mind has refused to acknowledge. Your body has been keeping score. At some point it asks to be heard.

[00:06:18] Brad’s Stock Question

[00:06:18] Kathy Washburn: Now my son Brad, my younger son who's 28, he has such a beautiful spirit. He's disciplined, humble and kind, and he also wrestles with comparison and negative self-talk, like all of us in this world of social media. Recently, he said something that absolutely delighted me. He said, mom, if I was a stock, I would definitely buy some shares of me.

[00:06:48] Kathy Washburn: What if we asked that about ourselves? Not with arrogance, 'cause Brad has none. But with genuine curiosity. Are you investing in [00:07:00] you?

[00:07:01] Kathy Washburn: Honestly, I spent years changing habits for the wrong reasons. The motivation was always external, other people's expectations, social structures, societal timelines, even quiet shame, the investments, AKA habits they never held because I hadn't done the foundational work.

[00:07:27] Kathy Washburn: Something. 

[00:07:28] Emotions and Patterns

[00:07:28] Kathy Washburn: One of those other things that I reflected on that really struck me as pivotal was in the middle of my divorce, I discovered that emotions are energy in motion. I was in the middle of doing some work in my positive psychology training. It was actually the beginning of of it all, and hearing that energy in motion.

[00:07:54] Kathy Washburn: That means emotions are supposed to move. And I [00:08:00] never let them move. I couldn't feel 'em, express them or even release them. I was a master of numbing them. realized that I spent a lifetime suppressing them. And guess what happens when you suppress emotions? They calcify into patterns that. You didn't actually choose.

[00:08:24] Kathy Washburn: It's kind of a weird paradox, but Bessel Vander Cox's book, the body keeps the score, confirms it, suppressed emotions do not disappear. They live in our body until they are allowed to be processed. 

[00:08:42] Inside Out Change

[00:08:42] Kathy Washburn: Change works from the inside out. You don't change your habits to become a different person. You become a different person.

[00:08:54] Kathy Washburn: And the habits follow. I'm gonna say that again. You don't [00:09:00] change your habits to become a different person. You become a different person and the habits follow.

[00:09:08] Kathy Washburn: Let's take a breath here. If you need a moment, take it. Grab a refill, take a walk. I'll be right here.

[00:09:19] Personal Investments List

[00:09:19] Kathy Washburn: So the rest of our time together today contains a list of personal investments that allow you not only to take stock of who you are, but also increases the value of your stock and who and how you are becoming. Each has a return, each has a re, has a risk. I like to think of this as the prospectus kind of a, a blueprint where you are part of the mattering.

[00:09:54] Walk Every Day

[00:09:54] Kathy Washburn: The first one, the first investment is to walk every [00:10:00] single day. The investment is 20 to 30 minutes of daily movement. The return. Clearer thinking, lower anxiety, better sleep, and the quiet confidence that comes from simply showing up for yourself. I know this risk, personally, where I live, winter has hit hard, it's icy.

[00:10:26] Kathy Washburn: There's knee deep snow, and my walks with my dog have been cut in half, maybe even less than that. I really feel it, not in just in my body, but in my mood, in my clarity, my sense of agency. I feel kind of inflamed all over Andrew Huber Man's research makes it clear moving. Morning walking, especially in natural light, is one of the most powerful tools we have, [00:11:00] and it's free available to you right now today.

[00:11:05] Wander and Wonder

[00:11:05] Kathy Washburn: The second investment is wander and wonder. Intentional breaks from routine, big adventures and small ones. Bueno Aries was mine, but a different route to work counts. Also. The return novelty activates the brain's reward system and wonder restores. Perspective play is a biological need, not a luxury. The risk, a life without wandering becomes a life of loops.

[00:11:46] Kathy Washburn: You literally just press play Dr. Keltner's. Awe. Research shows that even small experiences of wonder, reduce self-focus and increase connection. [00:12:00] Dr. Stewart Brown's work on play shows that adults who play a more creative, more resilient, and more alive. 

[00:12:09] Know Your Values

[00:12:09] Kathy Washburn: Number three, know your values. The investment, genuine unhurried, reflection on what you actually stand for, not a Google quiz.

[00:12:24] Kathy Washburn: Your own words, the return, every decision gets cleaner, every relationship gets cleaner, clearer. You stopped drifting and start directing the risk. Without your values, you'll unconsciously live someone else's and you'll feel the wrongness of it as a low grade dis dissatisfaction that you can't quite name.

[00:12:53] Kathy Washburn: Clear puts it simply in his book, atomic Habits. Every action you take [00:13:00] is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.

[00:13:05] Hydrate Like You Mean It

[00:13:05] Kathy Washburn: Your values are the ballot for hydrate, like you mean it, the investment actually enough water. Not what you think is enough, but enough water. Research shows that even mild dehydration, just one to 2% of your body weight, measurably impairs cognitive performance and mood. Women are particularly sensitive.

[00:13:39] Kathy Washburn: You may be attributing brain fog, fatigue and low mood to stress or aging. It might just be water. 

[00:13:50] Learn to Sleep

[00:13:50] Kathy Washburn: Five, learn to sleep the investment, sleep as a non-negotiable infrastructure, not an indulgence. After my divorce, I couldn't sleep. I cycled through Tylenol PM melatonin and 4:00 AM wake up until an acupuncturist introduced me to the Chinese body clock, the three to 5:00 AM window.

[00:14:16] Kathy Washburn: Which is the lungs. In traditional Chinese medicine is also where grief lives. No pill was gonna fix what I was actually carrying. Four months of grief therapy. Later I was sleeping again. Matthew Walker calls sleep the single most effective reset for brain and body health. It's not rest, it's work and it's work worth investing in.

[00:14:46] Clear What Doesn’t Belong

[00:14:46] Kathy Washburn: Six, clear away what no longer belongs the investment. Honest clearing of physical space. Not because minimalism is trendy, but [00:15:00] because our environment mirrors our internal state. The return mental clarity and the felt sense of making room not just in your home. Yourself, the risk we hold onto objects, the way we hold onto identities.

[00:15:22] Kathy Washburn: And Maria condo's question, does that spark joy is a values question in disguise. She's asking what belongs in the life you're building versus the one you're leaving behind? That's not tidying. That is self-knowledge. 

[00:15:40] Examine What You Consume

[00:15:40] Kathy Washburn: Number seven, examine what you're consuming, including alcohol during COVID, living alone in a city apartment.

[00:15:51] Kathy Washburn: Cocktails on Zoom became the ritual, and the only way I gathered with friends, the comfort, the social glue, [00:16:00] it filled holes inside of me. But I didn't stop there. I was drinking alone and I was drinking a lot. I enrolled in an online program called Take a Break with Rachel Hart. What shifted wasn't willpower.

[00:16:18] Kathy Washburn: It was understanding how my brain had formed the habit and what it was actually trying to solve. Loneliness that required an inside out change. The research on this is clear. The American Cancer Society now states there is no safe level of alcohol for cancer, risk reduction for women especially. This conversation is worth having, honestly.

[00:16:48] Change Negative Self Talk

[00:16:48] Kathy Washburn: Eight, the change the channel on negative self-talk, the investment, becoming a conscious observer of your inner narrative, [00:17:00] writing down the actual words your inner critic uses, and asking if you'd say those things to a friend or even a stranger. When I notice the subliminal, who do you think you are?

[00:17:15] Kathy Washburn: Whisper. I now just say the word change out loud because neurons that fire together wire together and I wanna stop feeding old circuits and start building ones that are actually serving me. Kristen Neff's. Research shows self-kindness is a more powerful motivator for change than self-criticism. We change more readily when we feel safe, not shamed.

[00:17:48] Learn Your Strengths

[00:17:48] Kathy Washburn: Nine, learn your strengths, the investment identifying, identifying what lights you up from the inside, not just [00:18:00] what you've been praised for. Rick Hanson describes the Negativity virus as Velcro for bad experiences and Teflon for good ones. We have to be deliberate about noticing what's working. The Via character strengths assessment.

[00:18:18] Kathy Washburn: That is free and highly research backed is a powerful starting point. I've linked it in the show notes. 

[00:18:28] Reflect Daily

[00:18:28] Kathy Washburn: 10 reflect daily. The investment, looking back on your day with curiosity rather than judgment, not a performance review. It's just a genuine inquiry. What happened? How did I feel? What does that tell me about who I'm becoming?

[00:18:54] Kathy Washburn: Reflection isn't navel gazing. It's the most forward facing thing you can do. [00:19:00] It's also how all of this began on a rooftop in Buenos Aries tracing the hundreds of choices that had quietly led me somewhere stunning and remarkable. That reflection changed how I understood my life, and

[00:19:16] Kathy Washburn: it it can change how you understand yours too.

[00:19:20] Closing Question

[00:19:20] Kathy Washburn: Investing in your future self is not a grand gesture. It doesn't require a retreat, a renovation, or even a revelation. It requires a choice, and then another one, and then another one.

[00:19:42] Kathy Washburn: When the motivation moves from external, what others expect to internal who you're becoming, the habits will hold. The changes compound and you begin to live from the inside out. And one [00:20:00] day you look around at your life, at everything you've been quietly, consistently building, and you feel it. If I was a stock, I'd definitely buy some shares of me.

[00:20:17] Kathy Washburn: That's Brad, age 28. He's not wrong. Neither are you.

[00:20:25] Kathy Washburn: I wanna leave you with one question before I close this episode. If you were a stock today. Would you buy shares of yourself? And if not yet, what is the one investment, just one that you could make this week, that future you would thank you for? You can journal it, sit with it on a walk, or just let it live in the background of your day.

[00:20:52] Kathy Washburn: I wish you well. 

[00:20:54]

[00:21:35] ​