Turning Trauma Into Financial Strength + Resiliency with Rachel Gonzales (Part 1)

A divorce can blow up your “someday” plan. A cancer diagnosis can make time feel loud. Rachel Gonzalez lived both, plus the grief of losing her parents, and she made a decision that changed everything: her pain would not be wasted. We sit down with Rachel, the founder of The Money Maven, to talk about resilience that’s built in real life not in a quote on a wall.

We get into the moment fear turns into focus, and why service became Rachel’s north star while navigating breast cancer treatment and the reality that doctor appointments don’t care about an 8-to-5 job. From motorcycles and rock climbing to rebuilding a career with flexibility, she shares what it looks like to keep moving forward even when life feels like a fire hose.

Then we go practical, because resilience also means preparedness. Rachel breaks down estate planning in plain language: medical power of attorney, financial power of attorney, end-of-life wishes, wills and trusts, life insurance, and retirement planning that protects your family. She also tells a story we won’t forget about a “will” that was just an unsigned Word document, a last-minute notary, and the probate chaos that so many families stumble into.

The Quiet Gift: A Journey of Self Worth and Resilience is now available for download as an audible.  Check it out!

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:06

All of us reach a point in time where we are depleted and need to somehow find a way to reignite the fire within. But how do we spark that flame? Welcome to Reignite Resilience, where we will venture into the heart of the human spirit. We'll discuss the art of reigniting our passion and strategies to stoke our enthusiasm. And now here are your hosts, Natalie Davis and Pamela Katz.

SPEAKER_02 0:41

Welcome back to another episode of Reignite Resilience. I am your co-host, Natalie Davis, and I'm so excited to be back with all of you today. And joining me, of course, is your co-host, Pam Katz.

SPEAKER_03 0:52

Hello, Pam. How are you? I am fantastic. It is Friday, and this is the perfect way to end the week with a podcast interview at the end of the day. So I'm excited. It's a good day. It's been a busy week. I'm glad it's over.

SPEAKER_02 1:05

It's been a very productive week. I actually just got off the phone with my oldest daughter and she's like, What have you been doing today? And I started going through and telling her the things I got done. And she's like, Oh, you're actually working today. Okay. I said, Yeah, I am.

SPEAKER_03 1:19

I sometimes question what our kids think that we do.

SPEAKER_02 1:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:23

What happens when you think I say I'm working from home? And my son's like, Well, mom, could you do this? Or what did you do that? What did you do? And I'm like, dude, I work. Like, I don't know what to imagine that I do and where this money just manifests from.

SPEAKER_02 1:38

Well, you know what? To be young and to be in that space again, and just when money does actually grow on trees or just pop up.

SPEAKER_03 1:45

Yes, yes, yes. It just appears.

SPEAKER_02 1:50

Well, we have a fabulous guest that is joining us today, and I'm super excited to have them share their story with our listeners. Pam, why don't you let everyone know who's joining us today?

SPEAKER_03 2:01

Today we have Rachel Gonzalez. She started The Money Maven with a simple goal in mind: create a platform that makes it easy to share her passion for helping families protect their loved ones and prepare for retirement. Diagnosed with breast cancer in 2022, and through this journey, she discovered a deeper strength and clarity of purpose. She made a decision. Her pain would not be wasted. She would turn it into purpose. Today her foundation is built on resilience, grit, and heart and is committed to being an agent of change. And we are so excited you are here. And I'm going to hand it to you because I want people to kind of get to know you a little bit before we kind of jump into your story of becoming the money made then. Thank you for being here and share your story.

Cancer Turns Fear Into Purpose

SPEAKER_01 2:53

Gosh, you know, I'm originally from Chicago. I'm going to start way back from there, born and raised. And in about 2016, that's when I decided I was going to make a change in my life. I was going through a divorce. Felt like I needed a new space. I was always very active. I was a solid rock climber. I was a want-to-be snowboarder. I came out once a year to Colorado to come snowboarding. So I just felt like Colorado was the place to be, was a chance for me to basically reinvent myself. And, you know, I think that was really what ignited, I'm going to call it Rachel 2.0. And going down the road of divorce and all of that change really took me to a dark place. It was a spot where I didn't know anybody out here. I didn't know east from west. I mean, they told me the mountains were west. I'm like, okay, I still don't know where I'm going. Because in Chicago, you've got Lake Michigan, and that's east. You can't see the lake, but everybody knows where it is because there's Lake Shore Drive and it runs north-south parallel. Anyway, moved out here. I was getting a terrible divorce that lasted for two and a half years and tried to reinvent myself. And, you know, life really tested me in so many different ways, ways I could have never even imagined. Right after moving here, my dad had a big family meeting and he told us that what he had been battling for 15 years, it was now coming to an end. And he told it was probably going to be six months. And it was exactly six months. So I moved out here and I kept going back to Chicago once or a week every month to just manage everything that my parents had. I'm the oldest of three kids. I'm their only daughter. And I think I felt a deeply rooted obligation to make sure that my parents were okay. They always relied on me to take care of them. So I did just that. And he passed away. And shortly thereafter, you know, within two years of that, then the same thing happened to my mom. And her end of life was probably the hardest for me because she was somebody that I was so close to. I found that she was a woman of grace, but she was also very simple in everything that she did. And to watch her go through all of that pain and anguish and hospitals, and she was just spiraling the tube, and that took a big toll on me. So when we talk about breast cancer, bringing me back to like 2022 is when I was diagnosed, I'm actually not surprised that I got it. I think that all of that trauma that I went through really was tipping the scale. Even though I was a healthy eater, even though I had healthy habits, I was the person that read the back of the labels to you, even. Be like, what are you eating? Do you have any idea what that ingredient even is? I mean, that was me. And so again, here I was with this diagnosis. My company was getting ready to close. I was going to lose my job. I was going to have to pay for my insurance out of my own pocket and go through all of this stuff. And I thought, how in the heck am I going to do this? A side of me thought, man, is life just throwing all of this stuff at me? My parents, their end-of-life documents were in order, their Medicare wasn't even in good shape. Then I've got this diagnosis in front of me. And it could very easily have turned into a scenario where you are going through it like I'm the victim. Woe is me. Poor me. I can't believe this is all happening to me. And I think maybe I felt bad for a little bit because I didn't know what to do. That was the truth of it. And I think through all that chaos and through all of that disruption, I'm going to call it, it really led me to a moment of clarity where you can take that and you can transform it into something else. I don't know if I would have a tip for anybody for that. It really was just an internal conversation that I had with myself where I just said, I can spend the next however many years I have on this planet saying I have cancer, saying that I have these treatments and these things, and I've lost my hair and so forth and so on. And everybody goes through things. Or I could talk to people about how they can protect their futures, how they can generate generational stability, how they can get their ducks in a row. And you can use me as the example and maybe just that thing to encourage you to say, man, I really should talk to an estate attorney or man, I really should get life insurance or whatever it is. There are all these things that you can do. And maybe fear is your greatest ally.

SPEAKER_03 7:12

I love that that was your take on it. You know, if you are in a space, because I mean, gosh, you went through a divorce and you moved across country, not knowing anybody, away from your family, to like completely start over again. And then you have this back and forth with your parents, and then you have to go through that, and then the diagnosis, and then the company closed. I mean, you were drinking out of a fire hose, all the stuff that was coming at you. So very easily could have just said, all right, I just give up. I'm just gonna be a victim. But you chose to take a message from it.

SPEAKER_01 7:44

Yeah, I really think that your life experiences really are your greatest teachers.

SPEAKER_03 7:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:49

And whether you choose to take the lesson in or you just choose to circle around and around and never accept that and move forward, that's on you. And is it hard? Oh, absolutely. It is painstakingly like just rip you to shreds kind of hard. Yeah, I'm not gonna deny that, but I knew that all of our time is limited. We don't know when that is. I don't really think that this breast cancer thing is the thing that's gonna take me down. I'm just gonna put that out into the universe. I don't live that way. Yeah. That's why I think having a purpose and serving families so that they can have these things in place or at least listen to the lesson and take some education from it and make better choices for themselves, then I'm doing the best that I can do. Things that maybe I couldn't done for myself, I can do for other people. And that type of giving is really what feeds me as a human being. That's my legacy.

SPEAKER_03 8:41

I love that. And I know how scary it can be when you go through a divorce. You know, your plan is you get married and you're gonna grow old and die with this person and all your stuff we figured out. And then that divorce happens and you're like, I don't have a will. I don't have a retirement. Uh-huh. And it can be very overwhelming, I would imagine.

Motorcycles Rock Climbing Mental Focus

SPEAKER_01 9:01

Absolutely. Divorce. That's not something I would ask anybody. I'm like, don't do it if you don't have to do it. But when you're in a marriage, you have to have that conversation with yourself where you're like, well, I'm gonna grow with this person or I'm not. And we just got to the point where that part of your life was over, the journey was over. We knew it. Maybe I knew it before he knew it, but that's whatever. Yes, neither here nor there. No need to focus on any of that. But at the same time, like it really was a chance for me to reinvent exactly what I wanted to be. And some of the things I asked myself was like, what are the things that you've always wanted to do that you could never do or that you were scared to do because you were married? One of those things, as Natalie can probably tell you, is I ride motorcycles. I've always wanted to ride motorcycles. Oh my gosh, that's awesome! Yeah. So when I came out here within two months, again, didn't know anybody. So I was like, Well, I've always wanted to get my motorcycle endorsement. Let's do it. What the heck is holding me back? I got nothing. I don't even know anybody. Let's just find a class, let's go take it and go. And I've never really looked back from that. I realize it can be scary to do, but even the rock climbing that I did for, gosh, like I said, almost two decades. When you are a rock climbing, you don't think about anything than what's in front of you. You really focus absolutely every cell in your body, every muscle that is moving, your intention, every focus that you have is on what's in front of you. Because if you distract yourself in any way, shape, or form, things could happen that you're not really prepared for, or that you're just okay, here I am. I'm gonna fall 20 feet. Hopefully everything is okay. Yeah. And when you do fall, which I've fallen many a times, you realize just get back up. There's life lessons in that as well. You just climb the rope again, you try it again, and you try it, and you try it, and you fail, and you at some point you're like, Woo-hoo, look at me, I did it. It only took me 40 times, but I got there.

SPEAKER_03 10:52

Have you always found yourself to just be an optimistic person from the time you were little?

SPEAKER_01 10:58

Yep. Very optimistic and also very independent. I'm first generation, and so when my mom came here from the Philippines, she came here with her sister, who she was very, very close to. She was pregnant with me, by the way. I don't know how many months, but she was pregnant with me. And my dad's paperwork, for whatever reason, was delayed. So for the first nine months of my life, I was with two women who moved from a foreign country, didn't have anything really. They were living with like distant relatives, a cousin of a whatever, and navigating life. Neither one of them drove. So we're in Chicago doing public transportation. And I think to myself, man, are those women strong. You want to talk resilience? I mean, I might have moved myself across the country, but they moved themselves halfway across the world. Yeah. Really didn't know anything. And sure, they were probably taught English in school. That's not their first language. Trying to navigate a whole new environment, find a job, and they didn't have a lot of money. And I really think that, as crazy it might sound, I think from the very get-go, that is what gave me the independence to just make choices for myself. Because if they could do it, oh heck yeah, I can do it. Scary? Yep. But everything in life is scary. Yeah. Really?

SPEAKER_03 12:11

Amazing.

SPEAKER_02 12:12

I've only known Rachel 2.0. So let's, I just want our listeners to know that. Like I only met Rachel in her 2.0 version. And I've shared this with you, Rachel, recently. Like the fact that when I met you, I was totally intimidated by you. Oh, that's right. I know. We are amazing friends now. But I will say you meet this woman that is, I don't know how tall you are. I'm 6'2, like attitude-wise, but I'm totally 5'2. 5'2 with 6'2 energy. That's exactly what it is.

SPEAKER_03 12:40

Oh my God, totally.

SPEAKER_02 12:41

And that's why when you said you ride motorcycles, I'm like, 5'2, the space that I met her in, it was like very much like a strong female group. She rides motorcycles, she does rock walls. And we're not talking like she rides motorcycles on a Sunday drive. Rachel was like riding her motorcycle across country by herself. Solo trips. And for the longest time, this part you don't know, for the longest time, because I didn't have your last name, or maybe I just didn't have it saved in my phone, you were Rachel the Badass. Like that's how it read in my phone. It was just Rachel the Badass.

SPEAKER_01 13:18

Your name on our podcast, Rachel the Bass. I will put Rachel the Badass as long as it's allowed by all the entities and say. 100%.

Why The Money Maven Was Born

SPEAKER_02 13:27

I like the Money Maven too. I know that we've had this conversation. Like going back in terms of your journey with your diagnosis and just with your treatment with breast cancer, you've noticed and recognized now, you've called out like these things that have happened that you're like, you know what? I've had a lot of incidents, trauma, however you'd like to call it, that were in my life. And then it shows up in some way, shape, or form. We always say that. For you, you've recognized that that might have contributed to the breast cancer diagnosis. Did you realize that in 2022 when you were going through it all? Because the company just announced that they're shutting down. They were very supportive of you in terms of the process that you were going through. Did you realize that all of that was coming to a head and had a role? Or did you discover that later after doing some reflection and being on the journey?

SPEAKER_01 14:15

I think in that moment, in the very first few months, we'll say it really was overwhelming because you're greeted with so many if questions, like when or what? Like you just can't answer them. And you think to yourself, oh my gosh, I haven't even done everything I've wanted to do. I'm leaving all of these people behind. You start to go down this rabbit hole. And I was absolutely terrified by all of it and spent many a times, all the conversations you have with your loved ones, very hard to do.

SPEAKER_00 14:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:44

To actually tell them that that is what you're going through because you're hurting them. And I don't want to hurt people. And so you're crying, they're crying, and you're like, oh my God, how many more of these can I take? Yeah. Now I laugh at it because I think to myself, it's that moment where you can connect with a human being, either that or you can distance yourself from them. And it's made every single one of my relationships, friendships, business partners. We're all so, so close. And I really, you know, I have such a wonderful army, a wonderful tribe of people that I surround myself with. That it's gonna sound so strange, but maybe cancer also was something that was supposed to link me to people and make me enjoy who they are and realize we all have these beautiful hearts and we're celebrating each other every single day. I don't take it for advantage.

SPEAKER_03 15:34

I love that.

SPEAKER_01 15:35

So it's crazy, but yep, that's my world. And I guess what else can I say about that? I wear my heart on my sleeve, I don't really have anything to hide. But yeah, I did use this to kind of build my platform of the money maven because at the end of the day, I realize as much as I think I'm a great employee, I give and I give and I do whatever I can so everybody is successful in their roles at the company. Working in eight to five doesn't work when you're going through these kinds of treatments because every doctor appointment, every scan, every treatment, you name it, I don't care who you're going to see. It's all Monday through Friday, eight to five. Yep, eight to five, middle of the day. Oh yeah. So how do you go to a company and say, I'm really great at what I do? You should hire me. I have all these assets that I can bring to the table. But by the way, I need Thursday off for the whole day because I have treatment. And then maybe you're sick a day, and then the next month you're like, well, I also need to have this done and that done and this done. And every week is a different week where you need something else.

SPEAKER_02 16:32

That was a true challenge that you had to work through because of that piece, like of who you were. We had this conversation. You're like, how do I apply for these jobs to replace the fact that your employer just closed down and you had to find a way to survive, right? And just pay for life. And you said, How do I apply for these jobs, knowing that I'm going to have to leave for treatment? And you will have those days that you're not feeling well and you can't show up as the version of you that historically did, right? Where you're there eight to five, seven to nine, whatever it was that you would show up. And so that's what kind of put you on this path to discovering how you could still help other people and have flexibility, which you needed.

Estate Planning Basics And Starting Young

SPEAKER_01 17:10

That's right. Yeah. It really was trying to balance my needs from a medical standpoint, but then also find a way to just fill my spirit and also put money in the bank at the end of the day, you know. And this was the way to do it. Because I've always been in finance in some way, shape, or form. My first job when I was 18 was a teller at a bank. And who knew I would work for investment banks, I would work for consulting firms, I would work for insurance companies, I would work for mortgage, all in that space. And I thought, well, why don't I take that and turn that into something better, something more? When my company said they were closing down, I actually met with a financial advisor and what she taught me, I was like, you know, I can do this. Everything that she did, I can absolutely do this. And my heart was in it, but my eye story was something that was purposeful, and I really kind of felt drawn to this mission. What really kind of upset me or pissed me off is that nobody told me about this before I was diagnosed. Why? And I was like, this is terrible. This is terrible. We can do better. I can do better. I can make a change one family at a time. I can help them so that they do have all their ducks in a row. I can guide them and give them the resources, give them the professionals. If it's not me, I have the people in mind that can help you, whether you're trying to maybe build assets and reduce your liabilities, or maybe it really is just the life insurance piece. Maybe it's the piece where you need to kind of hone it in on why estate documents are crucial. Let me tell you the story about my parents who passed away and didn't have anything in a row. And here I'm going through probates and it's COVID. And I mean, it just goes on and on. Like again, my life experience has taught me the long way around how to do things. It doesn't have to be that way for everybody.

SPEAKER_02 19:07

And I think the other big piece is realizing that it's within reach for everyone, right? Like there's something that everyone can do to make sure that they're prepared for that season of life. It's the thing that we don't want to talk about, but we have to be prepared for.

SPEAKER_01 19:20

It is such a hard conversation to have, you know, but maybe the breast cancer diagnosis again, it really brought it to a head because I did my state documents the moment I was diagnosed and thought, you gotta have it in a row. You absolutely have to, because otherwise, are you just willing to give away your money and your assets to the government? Is that what you want? Because that's what's gonna happen.

SPEAKER_03 19:40

Yeah, I love that because I did the same thing. I had nothing. And then the cancer happened, and I was like, okay, now I have a trust, I have a living will, I have blah, blah, blah. I didn't want my kids to have to deal with it. And I didn't want my ex-husband to get any of my stuff.

SPEAKER_01 19:56

We didn't say that out loud, but that's all you just want the money to go to the people that mean the most to you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. You're just giving away money if you don't. Yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_03 20:07

How do we get people to learn about this and start younger? Because I know when my ex and I were married, we were young, and it's like, oh, we're never gonna die. We didn't even have a will. And I'm thinking now, and I was just like, oh my gosh, we had kids, that could have been so bad.

SPEAKER_01 20:22

Honestly, I just think that tapping into the younger generations, I actually just donated a day of my time earlier this week. We were talking about how busy our weeks were. Wednesday of this week, I taught a bunch of seventh and eighth graders, gave them a good financial education. It's part of a junior achievement financial education park, where you go in and they give these scenarios. And they say, for instance, one of them might be that you're between the ages of 18 and 30, you're married, you have two kids, and here are your incomes. Now you have to actually plan out your life, whether you're gonna buy, you're gonna rent, and based on your credit score, these are the things that you can have. We'll give you a loan up there, whatever, this dollar amount. Now try and figure out your whole life. And then after that, try and figure out your health insurance, injury insurance, your life insurance. It's really quite great. And these kids were amazing. They asked such great questions for maintaining a car, like all of those things. How do you figure out a car payment? It's not just a car payment, by the way. You know, you've got your gas and you've got your maintenance and things like that. And it opens their eyes to thinking broader and bigger and in the future. And I think that's where it starts. You know, for the people like us, where we're already in that third or fourth chapter of your lives, but we're getting there anyway, the conversation is different because now we're playing catch up and now we're having to look at alternative ways, strategies, options that we may have to protect what we've built so far, because we don't have long runways like the 20 and 30 year olds. And for me, you know, when I have conversations with people, everybody comes from different social classes, economic classes, levels of education. And I really just try my best to meet them where they're at, ask them what is important to them, and then give them Tips and tricks and strategies that could improve and level up their lives. That's my goal at the end of the day. Whether you choose to do things with me or not, I just want you to know you have options because no one has told you that you do. You're not educated on that stuff in high school, in junior high, like those kids are. We need this because it's crucial to our retirement.

SPEAKER_03 22:22

Oh yeah. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 22:24

And just even what that end of life experience is going to be. And not end of life, like that fourth quarter. What is that experience going to be like in the fourth quarter? Having control of that and understanding that there is an opportunity to be empowered, to be in the preparedness for that versus the unknown. And even, I mean, beyond that, the legacy that you leave or the lack thereof or the mess that you leave for your loved ones to figure out and work through when you're no longer here. Like it's again, not the easy conversations to have, but it's the reality, right? You had to navigate through that with your parents and realizing that documents weren't notarized and legal and were non-existent. Yes.

The Notary Race Before Hospice

SPEAKER_01 23:05

What do I do with this? Yes. Yeah. I mean, if I could tell you about that story really quick, what ended up happening is for years, you know, my dad knew he was sick, and he gave us that big family talk and said, This is probably the last six months of my life. And I was like, okay, I asked, Do you have your documents in order? Every year I asked, I don't need to see them. I just need to know that you have them because I didn't want to have that in my head, like, oh, well, my brother gets this or I get that, or that's just not the way to think about it, right? That's up to them. I don't need to be involved in that conversation. So when my dad was on home hospice, I said, Okay, now is the time to show me all of your documents so I can figure out what to do and whatever and meet your last wishes. He said they're in the computer. So I go on the computer, it's a Word document, it is typed up, it is not signed, it is not notarized, it will never hold in a court of law. And everything with my parents was in my dad's name. So that meant my mom was gonna lose the house. That meant all money was gonna get locked up because it was gonna go to probate. And I was like, oh my goodness. So I called the caseworker from the hospital that was managing my dad's case, basically pleading, is there anything you can do? It's about lunchtime, by the way. I said, I'm like, I need a notary, I I need her this afternoon or him this afternoon. Is there anything you can do to help me out with this? And she said, I will be there. I will have the notary there. If you could just gather a couple witnesses, friends of your parents, you got it. They show up at 4 30 in the afternoon, the documents are signed. My dad passes away at 2 a.m. Holy cow. That's how close I was. And so you want to talk stress. I don't even know if I breathed through the entire time. It was a lot.

SPEAKER_03 24:43

Most people wouldn't even know anything about any of that. They don't know about probate. They don't know about any of those things. And so, how many times does this happen where things aren't together? And so some of our listeners that are listening to this right now thinking, uh, I don't have anything. And it would feel very overwhelming. What would be the first thing you would tell them that this would be the first thing I would focus on doing? Because that's going to be the most important.

SPEAKER_01 25:10

I don't know if I would press one document over another because it's a whole packet that needs to be done. You need power of attorney over medical. You need it also over financial. You need something that tells the people that have to make the decisions for you, like what to do. Do you want to be resuscitated? All of that kind of stuff. All that's very important. Because otherwise, then what ends up happening is all of the people in the room, maybe it's the parents, maybe it's the siblings or whoever meets, they're all arguing about what is the right decision to make. And to me, that is not the energy you want to go out in the world having. So not at all. It's all of your loved ones fighting. And then is a will important? You know, I really think that the first step I would say is if they have an estate attorney that they know of, talk to them. If they don't, you're always welcome to reach out to me. I will use whatever resources I have to connect you to the right people so that you can have that consultation and they can best guide you as to those documents. Because maybe your case is a little bit different. Maybe you own 10 properties and so a trust or something like that is in order. And it's more complicated than somebody that maybe just has an apartment, but they do have a 401k and they have teenagers. You never really know. So it's just best to start the conversation, take action. Is it a hard thing to do? Absolutely. But do it while you're younger, do it while you're healthy, because that's when you're gonna make your best decisions, not when you're stressed, like I was. I mean, I literally used a boilerplate thing from online and just threw some things together. And was it right or wrong? I don't know, but I had it signed, it held up. All the banks took it and they were like, okay, yes, we'll accept that. Okay, we're not gonna lock those funds. It was so much.

Closing Thoughts And How To Subscribe

SPEAKER_02 26:50

But that wasn't the end. You were able to get the signature, but the battle continued, right? Because, like you said, your dad took care of everything. So your mom didn't really have any insight or wasn't able to step up and help you in guiding you through, hey, you need to look into this, this, and this.

SPEAKER_00 27:06

Thank you for joining us today on the Reignite Resilience podcast. We hope you had some aha moments and learned a few new real life ideas to fuel the flames of passion. Please subscribe on your favorite streaming platform, like or download your favorite episodes, and of course, share with your friends and family. We look forward to seeing you again next time on Reignite Resilience.