Estate Planning Without Regret + Resiliency with Rachel Gonzales (Part 2)

Probate doesn’t just cost money, it costs time, focus, and peace while you’re already grieving. Natalie Davis and Pamela Kat sit down with Rachel “The Money Maven” Gonzalo to talk about the real-life moments that force financial clarity: a parent’s house stuck in probate during COVID, out-of-state headaches, and the painful lesson that “I thought everything was in place” can be dangerously wrong.

We get practical about estate planning and end-of-life documents: why wills, directives, and properly titled assets matter, how beneficiary designations work in the real world, and why paying an estate attorney now can save your family far more later. We also talk about the emotional side, the shame people feel about “starting late,” and how to replace that with a simple plan and a next step.

Then we shift into Q4 of life planning, the retirement stretch where stability matters more than bravado. Rachel explains tools people ask about, including a life insurance retirement plan (LERP), ways risk-averse savers think about protecting principal with a “zero floor,” and why reviewing old policies can uncover surprises, including coverage that looks big on paper but isn’t. We also dig into Medicare guidance, common confusion, and how seniors can get bamboozled when no one slows down to educate them.

The Quiet Gift: A Journey of Self Worth and Resilience is now available for download as an audible.  Check it out!

Transcript

Rekindling Resilience Through Preparedness

SPEAKER_00 0:06

All of us reach a point in time where we are depleted and need to somehow find a way to reignite the fire within. But how do we spark that flame? Welcome to Reignite Resilience, where we will venture into the heart of the human spirit. We'll discuss the art of reigniting our passion and strategies to stoke our enthusiasm. And now here are your hosts, Natalie Davis and Pamela Kat.

SPEAKER_01 0:41

It was quite challenging to say the least. And you know, I did fail in a sense, or I learned, I should say, in a sense, because I assumed that once that all happened, my mom did everything she needed to do to put everything in her name. She did the house, it was still in my dad's name. She just kept paying the mortgage payment on it. So when she passed away, it did go to probate.

SPEAKER_03 1:01

Oh, wow.

unknown 1:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:03

And that was right in the realm of COVID. So they weren't meeting in person. And it took the courts' time to figure out how they were going to manage those cases. So the delay was even longer. And in the meantime, the house that they had, I couldn't afford to do anything with that house. It just had to sit while I figured this all out. And you know, here I am. Now my job is closing down. And I'm like, oh my gosh. Everything was just completely overwhelming. And we got it all done. Don't get me wrong, but it cost me a ton of money to get to get it to happen to get the attorney in place to manage the probate case and to sell the property and all that kind of stuff. And I'm trying to sell a property that's in Illinois, right? Here I am in Colorado. And so blah.

unknown 1:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:50

Exactly. Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 1:54

Exactly. I was gonna say, like you touched on something when you said that you paid the attorney a lot because we have a mutual friend that's an attorney, and she said something a few weeks ago in an event that you held, and it has continued to play over and over. It lives rent-free in my head. So if she hears this, so she knows. She said, you can either pay me a lot now or you can pay me significantly more after you're gone. And I thought, oh my gosh, that drives home the point. It's an investment to make sure that everything is prepared for that season of life, or you can leave that burden. That's the way I interpreted that, or leave that burden that's exponentially more expensive on the people that you love.

SPEAKER_03 2:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:32

Yep.

SPEAKER_03 2:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:33

Like I don't know what would it cost to do my parents' end-of-life documents and work with an estate attorney, but I can tell you that mine, what I paid for mine versus what I paid to do that whole probate thing, one tenth, one tenth of what the probate case was.

SPEAKER_03 2:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:46

So yes, you should absolutely do it. If you want to talk about leveling up your life and saving money, protecting your future, that's the way to start.

SPEAKER_03 2:53

I will say I remember when I did it and it was done and I brought it home and it just I was like, it was almost like I had this weight lifted off me. Like, okay, now I can breathe. Like everybody knows what's going to happen now, and I don't have to worry about it.

SPEAKER_01 3:09

So that's right. Yeah, it really does. It brings you peace because you don't have to worry about what's going to happen to your children or to your assets or to any of that stuff. You know exactly you made the decisions yourself. You know that exactly your wishes, right? Instead of, like I said, the scenario that plays out when siblings or whomever they're all fighting over it because there are no there were no decisions made. Nobody knows what it is that you want.

SPEAKER_03 3:33

Yeah. No, they'll find out who the favorite was once I'm dead.

SPEAKER_01 3:45

Not really. Here's the deal. Like if you have a bunch of investments and you designate your beneficiaries, those advisors, when they talk to the beneficiaries, they're only allowed to talk about the accounts that they're on. So if you have several accounts and you give portions to some of the kids or whomever, and then one person gets another, they can't talk to the siblings about the accounts that they're not on. So yeah, you can absolutely they'll they'll know amongst themselves if they'll talk about exactly.

Q4 Of Life Planning Explained

A Widow’s Roadmap To Stability

SPEAKER_02 4:15

Yeah, there will be sides, exactly. Like someone's gonna walk out and buy a new house, and the other one's gonna be able to, like, I don't know, pay for the services. And then that's it. Well, and it can be changed at any time. Exactly. They'll know, they'll know. I think I'm just gonna bring the elephant right smack dab into the middle of the room because when we're talking about like the hard conversation, when we're talking about end-of-life planning, that in itself is hard. But what you do as well is also guide people to prepare for Q4 of life, like making sure that when you are retired, that you are comfortable, that you can support and maintain the lifestyle that you want to establish. And quite honestly, the elephant here being people have a hard time opening up about their finances, like what they have done or what they have not done, because we don't have a lot of grace with ourselves, right? Like it's, yeah, I probably should have invested in the 401k when I was in my 20s and I didn't. And so here I am at 45. What would you tell me what to do, right? And so talk to us a little bit about your services and how you work with people to help them prepare for Q4 of life because that's different than end of life, like directive and will and all of that.

Medicare Confusion And Elder Vulnerability

SPEAKER_01 5:24

So I'll give you a couple of different scenarios when people are preparing. Like one of the scenarios I'm gonna give you is a couple that got married and they were college sweethearts, and at 40 years old, the husband passes away unexpectedly. He did have a life insurance policy. So now the living spouse has that policy. She comes and she meets with me and she says, I know I have to figure out something because one, I'm the only mama, I'm the only one that's left. And I've got two kids that I need to make sure are taken care of. You know, it was a perfect opportunity to have the conversation, not just for her, but also for the two kids because they're young, they have that long runway. We did some life insurance policies that are gonna follow them as long as they're funded correctly, which they are. It's gonna follow them to the age of 121. Those policies are there. So it doesn't matter, Mama Bear, you now have a second level of peace of mind because what we have put in place for you that we've paid for with your father that passed away, with his insurance policy, is we have put these policies that they're good, you're good, both kids are covered. And then for Mama Bear, she's 40, so she has a little bit of time left, but she is overwhelmed. She is feeling like she can't handle this. It took her a good few years to actually get to a point where she was like, I really have to talk to somebody about this because I don't know what I'm doing. He took care of all of that, right? So I will tell you that the first conversation we had, and she was telling me everything, I just gave her the floor because I lead with empathy, and at the end of the day, that's what matters most. And what she needed was a friend. So I heard her story and we cried together. I hugged her and I said, I've got you. I've got you. I don't care what it is you need, I've got you. She had trouble even getting a cell phone and she was like, I don't know what to do. I'm like, I live a few miles away from you. Just call me. I'll go to the ATT store with you. I'll help you with that. She's like, What? Yeah, I will. I will, you know, but let's get you prepared for this Q4. So there are things that you can put in place. It's called a life insurance retirement plan, a LERP. It's a newer term that's in the market, but it's where you can utilize your life insurance to also help fund your retirement. And because it is life insurance, it is something that you can access before the age of 59 and a half, which is what most retirement funds you cannot do. You have to hold, otherwise, you're taxed, right? And these are things that I teach people about. So for her, I said, okay, let's teach you about this because you that's something you can absolutely put in place. The other thing that we did is she's somebody that doesn't like risk. She doesn't want to expose everything that she has saved in this 401k to risk. And it was the 401k that she got from her spouse that passed away. So I said, Well, you're still currently working. Let's do something with that. What if would it be of interest if we could come up with a plan where you have a zero floor? So zero is your hero. There's no risk in the marketplace, but you can still earn interest that compounds while you're working. Is that something that, and at the end of the day, when you're ready to retire, it can produce lifetime income as though it's serving like a pension plan or a supplemental social security plan. Those are the conversations I have with people is really what are your goals? What sounds like it would lead to a more stable future for you? Something that was going to protect and just, you know, create something where you're still at peace in that fourth quarter of life. So that's one side of it. And that's more of the, believe it or not, life insurance side of it. There's also the aspect of Medicare because that environment is super duper confusing. And I am one of these people that, you know, my partner, Nathan, he's a wonderful man and his father has dementia. And I will tell you that his dad was definitely bamboozled by somebody that just wanted to make a commission off of his Medicare. They kept changing his policy, and it was an utter nightmare because he couldn't remember what was up or down. And I thought, is this what like fourth quarter of life is? I mean, are these people they're already in my mind, they're very vulnerable in so many ways, right? And this is the way we're gonna greet them. No, that's not cool by me. I had the licensing to do it, and so I decided I'm gonna add that Medicare piece to it as well because everybody needs it. That's your that is your health insurance when you're getting ready to retire or you have a disability, you know, depending on what your case is. But I can help you navigate that. I'm a broker for that as well. I represent a bunch of different carriers, and I again just meet where you're at. Do you have special conditions? Are you on certain medications? You know, are there different areas that you live in in Colorado? So these plans are accessible to you. And we just talk about what sounds right for you. How can we save you money? Because you just don't know. I actually have a client, this is kind of a funny story. It's a guy that was always on a Kaiser Permanente plan, and he knew he was gonna be moving. And when he moved, that plan, the closest Kaiser facility, was two hours away from where his new place was going to be. And he's 80 years old. Oh, and so I said, I know, a power to you, but are you sure that's the right kind of plan for you? You're gonna be able to drive to see your primary doctor every time you need him, two hours, one direction. And you know, after talking it through things, we knew it wasn't the right plan. So we found the right plan for him. But what was funny is the current plan that he had, when we looked it up, he had a benefit where he could take$75 and apply it to over-the-counter stuff. So, like aspirin, band-aids, you know, like you're just everyday things. And I said, Do you know you have$75 just sitting here, not that you haven't used? He's like, I didn't know. I'm like, well, let's use it because you use it or you lose it. It doesn't roll over. And we went through his whole list of medications and whatever canes and compression socks or whatever it was he needed. And he said he had everything. And I was like, Okay, well, we're down to toilet paper. Do you need toilet paper? Yeah. He's like, he's like, I guess we bought him$75 worth of toilet paper. Perfect.

SPEAKER_02 11:16

Yes, yes, but he's not. Which the reality is it's only 24 rolls, so don't get too excited.

SPEAKER_01 11:25

That's the thing, is like he had a plan. He didn't even know what he had. Yeah, you know, nobody ever talked to him. He he'd been on this plan for years and years. Yeah. And so, you know, just having a conversation with someone and everything that I do, I don't charge anybody for what I do. The carriers, they're the people that actually pay me because that's the way it should be, truly, if you ask me. We just need to give you the education so you can make good choices for yourself. That's my role. I think of me as like a CFO giving you different options, and you're the CEO of your life, and you ultimately make all decisions. I have no say so on any of that.

SPEAKER_03 11:58

Love that. Love it, love it.

unknown 11:59

Yeah.

The Million Dollar Policy That Wasn’t

SPEAKER_02 12:00

I think that's an important piece because there's a lot of fear or just maybe intrepidation or whatever it is, like whatever there's reservation in terms of, well, I don't want to talk to anyone about this, or I don't want to talk about that yet. I'll wait until you know later. Like that's something that I'll get to eventually. And some of the things that we've talked about is like you don't know what's going to happen. So we don't know where you'll be eventually. And the other piece is like just having someone that is an expert in that space. And I think now's probably a good time for us to do the asterisk that we're not giving any type of financial advice on this podcast. Rachel. Yes. Yes. Reach out to Rachel if you want to connect with her. But Rachel, you know the story because you were able to help me through this. I had a very similar instance where I thought, oh, I'm set. I'm fine. I had a broker that issued a policy for me. And I thought, okay, wonderful. I'm all set. My children are set. I took out a million-dollar life insurance policy and I said, okay, my children are going to be fine. And then you and I sat down and we had a conversation. You said, bring everything, bring everything that you have. And I did. And we sat down and we actually looked at it. And I am not an expert in this field. I have not been in the financial space. And I trusted the individuals that gave me advice and guidance. And so what we discovered in this quote unquote million dollar policy that it was actually a burial policy, I think it was like$11,000 or something at the end of the day. If I happened to live to 77, if I was 77 years older, older, if I died at any of those ages or beyond that, the policy itself was worth like$10,000,$11,000. Like nothing. It was basically a burial policy. And I'd already, I had the policy for years and I'd paid. You had paid into it for years. For years. Yeah. And so it's a matter of making that call. It's like, okay, well, I have all intentions of living past 77 years old. Do I keep just pumping money into this? Or do I sit down with someone and have a conversation to truly look at what does Q4 of life look like for you, or what do you want it to look like? And let's build that out. And I'm grateful that I did. It still sucked. That hurts.

SPEAKER_01 14:07

I mean, that was very painful for your brain. I thought, all right. And I'm not a very pushy person. That's the funny thing is Natalie and I have sat on that conversation for a year. I'm like, she's just gonna figure it out. She's gonna figure it out. I taught her everything that she needed to know, and she'll come to me when she's ready.

SPEAKER_02 14:21

I have to get the ego out of the way because that part of me is like, you do feel like you're bamboozled, right? Like for me, I was like, I cannot believe that I'm bamboozled. And here's the reality like, whatever you think that you're gonna do on your own in your savings account, it's not gonna happen, right? Like you have to have something that's actually positioning you for growth. And I too am risk averse. So we talked about that. Like, I don't want to have the risk in my investment. So I thought until I realized, well, shoot, if I had done this 10 years ago, it'd be one significantly cheaper. And I could have been open to a little bit more risk in that season of life. But here I am, and it was coming to terms with where I am today and what do I want in the next 30, 40 years? What's that gonna look like? And the best time to take action is now. And so I want to thank you for just being like that person to give me advice and guidance because it was helpful.

SPEAKER_01 15:10

Yeah, it is absolutely my pleasure because, like I said, that kind of stuff makes me feel good. Makes me feel so good. And I'm like, yes, yeah, that's one more family protected, that's one more friend that I know is gonna be just fine, you know. Yeah, even if you have policies, you know, to Natalie's point, if you've never looked at it or it's 10 years old, it really would, just like a car insurance or homeowner's insurance, it really would be a good idea to just do a review. I mean, what's the harm? It might take an hour of your time, and yes, you're gonna have to pull up your policy or whatnot. But if there is something better out there in the market, or we can re-educate you so you know exactly where you're at, because you might have done it like 10 years ago, right? 15 years ago. You have no idea, and you're like, oh, that's the deal. It's a good thing. It's a good thing. Like I said, P and C agents, I'm sure that they recommend to do that. And people do that with their cars, they'll do it like with their homes, all that stuff. So you should absolutely do it with your life insurance folks.

SPEAKER_03 16:06

All right. Well, I'll be reaching out to you as soon as we're done because of course.

SPEAKER_02 16:11

My pleasure.

SPEAKER_03 16:12

Everyone should. Everyone should. To your point, Natalie. It's like, I'm not an expert in that, and I don't want to be an expert in that. Not at all. I don't want to be an expert. There's a lot of things I don't want to be an expert at. I would rather somebody else be the expert and then, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 16:24

And trust that they have your best intention at heart, right? And I'm not saying anything about the prior broker, they had malicious intent. But Rachel, you started to allude to it. There are people that are taking advantage of the silver society, unfortunately. Like they are seeing it as an opportunity and they're inundated with information until they either shut down or they process the wrong thing, right?

Small Habits That Change Everything

SPEAKER_01 16:48

And you know what I will tell you since we were talking about people being sensitive to their finances, just like people are sensitive to their health issues, at the end of the day, the information that we collect, it's important because if we don't, then we can't make good suggestions, right? So if we're talking about Medicare, if you don't tell me the medications that you're on, how do I present to you different carriers and what the costs of those medications are if you're not willing to disclose that information? I'm trying to save money, but if you can't give me all of that information, I can't help you. And it's the same thing when it comes to financial stuff. We really need to know where you're at because we're not here to leave you in a position where you have nothing to lean on, where you're using your last$20 to just pay for it. No, no, no, no, right? We want to leave you in a place where you realize you have the power to make good choices and make changes, even if they're small, little tiny daily habits, you know. We talk about maybe it's Starbucks coffee. You know, for me it would be boba. I love boba, but I'm not gonna go and do it every day because that's eight dollars every day, right? Yes, it's just those tiny little daily habits that can make a big change. Because even if you just said, okay, I'm gonna not do boba once a week and it's eight dollars and so that's$32, is that something that can make a change in your life? One million percent. Yeah, one million percent. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 18:10

So with people that are on Medicare currently, do you recommend them doing kind of reviewing? Okay, I'm gonna get you a connection with my parents as well. So there's that.

SPEAKER_01 18:20

Absolutely. And you know, one of the reasons we want to do that is because sometimes there is also disruption in Medicare and things change. And you want to make sure that the plan that they're on, because maybe they've been on Medicare for the last 15, 20 years. Maybe there are other, you know, carriers that have more things to offer them. And they don't know it because they've just held tight with the one that they had, you know. And it's again, it also is a good thing because as they age, it's a good thing for other people to even know, like their kids, if they're gonna start to manage their cares, if their parents are getting into nursing homes or whatnot, just to know what they've got, to know the different uh coverages that they have everything from hospitalization to can they leave their network and so forth and so on. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 19:06

So much good information. Uh oh my gosh. So, what has been the biggest reward of doing what you're doing now that you maybe you didn't expect?

SPEAKER_01 19:16

I think that having the ability to help people reshape and empower themselves, you know, because I can talk to Lam Blue in the face. I am very passionate about everything from ending financial illiteracy to helping people build very stable futures. But at the end of the day, what really, really like makes me pink, particularly pink inside, is the fact that they realize for themselves that they've got it.

SPEAKER_03 19:44

Yeah. So that realization that they're like, oh my gosh, I've got this.

SPEAKER_01 19:48

It's not just a pipe dream. They can make a change, it doesn't take a whole lot, and that they understand that there are resources. You can call me at any time. Like I had a client call me to say, Oh my gosh, my insurance has gone up so much for my home. I'm so upset with this whole agent, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I said, I've got somebody, I'll send you their information. And then she called me back and said, The person you referred me to, number one, was super thorough. And I was like, Yes, she's very detailed about everything that she presents. And then they said, and she saved me thousands of dollars. And I'm like, Hurrah! Love that for you. Love that.

SPEAKER_03 20:19

That's awesome.

SPEAKER_01 20:21

It's smiling on the inside and it shows on the outside. You know, it's I think that I lead with my heart and then just back it up with what I know and what I don't know, I'm gonna give to the resources that do know.

SPEAKER_03 20:32

Yeah. And I think, you know, finances and money and retirement and all that stuff has been such a a taboo thing. Like people just don't want to talk about it. And they think, well, if I don't talk about it, it'll it just will go away. I won't have to worry about it. It'll just, you know, whatever the route. Yeah, don't think about it. So but when you when you actually step into it and do it, and I think a lot of that has to do with just the fear because people just don't know what they don't know. And then it does feel super overwhelming. I know that when I got my divorce and I had to get my own insurance for the first time, I was like, it was terrifying. It was absolutely overwhelming and terrifying. And now, well, it's taken me like 10 years, but I now I'm I still scary. But so I love that we're doing this episode because I think it just normalizes it. Like we're all in the same boat.

SPEAKER_02 21:20

Yes, ma'am.

SPEAKER_03 21:21

And so one million yeah, don't be afraid or ashamed to reach out and get somebody that's like an expert at it to help you. So this is amazing.

SPEAKER_01 21:30

Yes, it would be my pleasure and my honor because, like I said, our days are numbered. Who knows? But what I do know is with my time here, I will make a change. I will do it one family at a time, just like I'm gonna do one less bobo week at a time.

How To Reach The Money Maven

SPEAKER_02 21:44

So my gosh, that's amazing. Okay, the Money Maven. How can people get a hold of you?

SPEAKER_01 21:53

How can they find you? Where are you? Well, I'm on Facebook as the Money Maven. I also have the site themoneymaven.net. You can see. Schedule a free consultation. Um, you can do it in person, you can do it via Zoom. There's multiple places on that website that you can get a hold of it. It's pretty simple to do. Or if you're gonna like show my information here, that's cool. That's perfect. You know, I'm not somebody that I I don't consider myself traditional by any stretch of the imagination, but I do consider myself to be somebody that leads with their heart and that really tries to be empathetic and you know, just give you the best that I can give you every time. And my only ask is that if I do that, that you do the same for me.

SPEAKER_00 22:30

I love it.

Take Action And Closing Messages

SPEAKER_02 22:31

I think that's fair enough. I love that. Well, Rachel, thank you for joining us. Thank you for sharing your personal story. Thank you for sharing your knowledge and resources in terms of planning in life and making sure that we're prepared. I mean, just to be comfortable. We're not even talking about creating additional wealth. We're just talking about sustaining and making sure that we're comfortable and have what we need to live the lives that we want to have. But before we go, I want to ask: do you have any like last words or a piece of advice for our listeners? Anything that you wanted to touch on that we haven't touched on yet today?

SPEAKER_01 23:05

You know, my hope is that in listening to the podcast, that they are like, wow, I feel ignited to make a change, and that in that they do take some action, whatever that action might be. Maybe you go onto my website and you're like, all right, I'm gonna have a conversation with this girl because she's peppy and optimistic. And heck, she can just lay it all on the line in 55 minutes. I can absolutely talk to her for like 20. Right. And that's it, is to really just take action. Do something, do anything, you know, even if it's just the tiniest thing, it will change the trajectory of your entire life. Because that is the only way to grow.

SPEAKER_03 23:42

Taking action. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 23:44

I love it.

SPEAKER_03 23:44

From the mouths of Rachel Badass Gonzalo.

SPEAKER_02 23:53

Yes, well, don't forget the the she was it was Rachel the badass. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 23:58

Okay, we gotta end the love it, I love it. Thank you so much, Lady. Oh my gosh, it's really been nice.

SPEAKER_02 24:08

Oh my gosh, this has been amazing. Thank you, thank you, thank you. And thank you for what you're doing, the passion that you bring to your work. It shows, and thank you for having just that intention of making a difference in one family, one family at a time. I think that's huge, and that's what we can all strive for is just to make a difference in one person's life. So, one family at a time. Thank you for joining us. We will put the moneymaven.net in the link in the show notes so people can click through and find you. Thank you for joining us.

SPEAKER_01 24:37

Oh, thank you, ladies. It's like I said, truly been my pleasure. Like I said, one day at a time. That's all we can do.

SPEAKER_02 24:43

Love that. You all, you know the deal. Head on over to reigniteresilience.com and check out what's going in our world. If you haven't subscribed to our weekly newsletter, go ahead and do so because we're gonna do a deeper dive into what we discuss with our guest on our Think Letters, and make sure that you follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Until next time, we'll see y'all soon.

SPEAKER_00 25:02

Hi, everyone. Thank you for joining us today on the Reignite Resilience podcast. We hope you had some aha moments and learned a few new real life ideas to fuel the flames of passion. Please subscribe on your favorite streaming platform, like or download your favorite episodes, and of course, share with your friends and family. We look forward to seeing you again next time on Reignite Resilience.