The Mentorship Cheat Code

In this week’s episode, I open up about my journey with mentorship and why it's become such a game changer for me lately. 

I shared some real talk about investing in myself (even when it felt scary), the difference between mentorship, coaching, and therapy, and how surrounding myself with the right people has helped me level up, both personally and professionally. 

I also get into some stats, a few of my own stories (including the ups and downs), and offer some advice for anyone looking to find a mentor or just needing a little push to take that next step. If you’re into self-expansion, making bold moves, or just want to hear what’s been working for me, this one’s for you! 

Xx, Shy ♡  

Transcript

0:01

Hello and welcome back to Shy Space where we talk about all things pertaining to mental health manifestation, you name it. My name is Shy. I am the host of this podcast, and I am making a comeback after having started this show two years ago. And. Having to like really put a big pause on it and slow roll it, uh, temporarily. So this is episode three of season two. We're getting consistent this season, which I'm really excited about. So, thank you for being here. If you watched last week's episode, we talked a lot about why I had gone on that hiatus and a little bit about the breakup that I've gone through recently. So if you're interested in either of those topics or maybe you can relate and you need some support there, definitely give that episode a listen. I feel like, um, there's a lot of good life advice things that I shared there. Anyways, just wanted to welcome you guys back. If you're listening, thank you so much for being here. I really, truly appreciate it so much. And I just want to kind of preface this episode with a reminder that this season is really about self expansion and making big moves for me personally. So if that's like the vibe that you're looking to. Embody for the rest of the year and maybe the year 2026, then I think this is a good place for you to be. And I'm excited for all of us to grow together. So thank you again for being here. And yeah, so this week's episode we're talking about mentorship, which is, I don't know why I said it so weirdly, like that mentorship, um, which is. Something that I find very, very important and always have, but I'm just now starting to realize like the actual true value of it and how it can help you overcome roadblocks in life. And I'll share more details about you know, how I've come to that understanding and my experience there, but I just kind of wanna talk about. You know what it is, why it's important first, and then share some tidbits in that regard. But it really has played a huge role in this new chapter of my life. And so I just think that it's something that's really important to talk about because not only will it help fuel your goals and your dreams when it comes to like manifestation and law of attraction, but it's also gonna help build your confidence and, really just help you, like, take that next step forward, which is really hard to do sometimes when you're in a silo of any kind. The way that I like to frame pitching mentorship to myself, or really anyone who wanted to know more about it or would wanna hear like, why I invest in mentorship and have for so long, is basically just by asking the question, have you ever wished somebody could just hand you the answers? I'm sure most people can somewhat agree or like resonate with that statement. Like life can be really hard and sometimes you just want somebody that has already done it and lived it and succeeded in it to literally just hand you the answers and like hand you the gold formula So if you've ever felt that way, I feel like this is a good episode to listen to because it took me a really long time to understand the value of mentorship. Like I never really wanted to invest money, especially high ticket purchases. Into mentorship because I felt like I could figure it all out on my own. Especially when it comes to just like this day and age that we live in with technology, YouTube ai now, like so many people are self-taught and I think that that's absolutely amazing and wonderful. And I personally am self-taught in a lot of things. Like this podcast for example, I've had absolutely no one help me with this. Like this is just completely self-taught. Lots of YouTube videos and studying and learning, but there are other things. In life that I am not able to do that with. And also, like with this podcast specifically, obviously my goal with the podcast is to grow it over time. So I do believe that there will be a time where I will have to invest in some type of like agency or something to support me with it because I'm not gonna be able to. Understand all the ins and outs of taking it to the next level once I'm able to do that. So I think that's where mentorship can really bring the most value for me and for most people is like when you're reaching that peak and you can't get to that next level up because you just don't have the right tools in the right infrastructure in place in terms of like how to get there. So I feel like first we need to talk about what is mentorship really, because it can mean a lot of different things in a lot of different realms of life. And I wanna clarify that it doesn't always mean like a really formal setup. It could be a friend, a boss, a content creator that you admire and follow and study or, you know, purchase courses from them or download their eBooks to learn from them. Or it could be a coach, like a sports coach, or you know, somebody that you end up hiring on a more formal basis. But I just wanna emphasize that because I, I don't want people to listen to this and think that I'm just trying to. Suggest that everyone invest in like some really high ticket cost mentorship program to get to where they wanna go. Like, I think that there are plenty of ways to leverage mentorship, and it doesn't always have to be in a formal paid setting. So I have done most of these things, and again, I'll talk about that, which is why I stepped into that, like paying for mentorship state for a lack of a better explanation. And also it's really just about having proximity to experience and knowledge, not perfection. Like you don't need to learn how to become a podcaster from the most famous podcaster on the planet. You know, like it's totally fine to go watch YouTube videos about somebody who's created a podcast at home, if that's what your goal is. And you're starting small and starting from scratch. You don't need to have something like crazy perfect that you're learning from, or like, like I said, the most successful podcaster or something like that. That is just not what it's about. It's just about being around people that have like not only the same mentality as you or what you're looking to embody from a mentality perspective, but also, being surrounded by like-minded individuals who share the same goals as you, or the same passions, or, maybe they just understand you more because you're in alignment with the same trajectory in life or intended trajectory. So I just think that that's, yeah, I just feel like that's so important and so helpful, like even just being around, individuals on a team that you're working with that can coach you and train you and just help guide you. Like, one of the big reasons that I left my previous job was because I was primarily working in a silo. I was basically heading all of sales alongside the CEO and. That was a great experience in so many ways that I will never, ever, ever take for granted. But on the same token, like I felt like I needed more exposure to more reps and just like a larger team so that I could learn more and absorb more and be surrounded by more people who are doing what I'm doing and succeeding at what I'm trying to succeed at, which is selling. And it's really hard to do that when you're just comparing yourself to you. Like I was just literally. The only one selling for the most part. And like, that's not a lot of like drive or competition. Um, I mean for me it is'cause I do like to compete with myself, but it could just doesn't, like, it doesn't, that flame will fizzle out quickly for me personally. So again, like just surrounding yourself with people and like, that doesn't mean that you have to like start a job specifically to be around the types of people that you want to. You could even join a community, whether it's online or in person, or a study group or if you like to do sports, like a, a sports group that is just casual and informal, but again, can help you grow and level up those skills. So, another thing I think is really important to touch on is the difference between. Mentorship. Why do I keep saying it like that? Mentorship and coaching versus therapy. Now I do both mentorship and like I invest in both mentorship and therapy. I'm in therapy every single week and they are completely different. They are not at all the same. I can get a lot of the same value out of both of them, but I will not. Like they are just not the same. And so I don't ever want to recommend that somebody get like a coach or a mentor and I don't know, think that that's a replacement for therapy if they're going through something traumatic or they have mental health issues that they need to overcome.'cause that's absolutely not the case. Like my therapist could definitely help me with the questions that I have about my life and like how I wanna be mentored for sure. But. That's not what she is there for in terms of like a career perspective. Like she's the therapist and my mentor is a mentor. So again, proximity to experience is the key there. So I do think that you can find benefit in coaching, like life coaching versus mentorship without therapy. If your life coaching is a little bit more personal and dives a little bit deeper into things. That are not so surface level because there obviously are life coaches out there who will address and help with anything, coach on anything. It doesn't have to be like finances or jobs, it can be relationships and really personal things. So, I just think that when it comes to like really deeply rooted issues or deeply rooted trauma, things like that, therapy is really important. I am biased being a mental health student and a former aspiring therapist, but I still believe that like wholeheartedly. So take it or leave it y'all. So let's also talk about why it matters. So I'm gonna throw some statistics at y'all because although I am a very spiritual person and I believe in things that I cannot see and cannot fully conceptualize, like in this 3D reality, if you will. I do also find myself to be very comfortable and confident when I'm able to lean on science and statistical information. So. I'm sure there's some other people out there who feel the same way, so I thought it'd be cool to just share some of these stats that I had been learning and researching over the years when trying to make these decisions and kind of decide like, is it a good idea to invest this$10,000 that I don't really have into this program right now? Like, that's a. Obviously a big decision to make, especially if you don't have 10 grand, just like sitting on the sidelines waiting to be invested into something. So, putting yourself in debt to invest in yourself is a really big thing to do, and it's really scary. And so it's, it's things like this where I was able to lean on, like first trusting my gut and my intuition, but then also looking at the facts like. What are the facts about mentorship? So let's talk about them. According to Forbes, people with mentors, why do I keep saying mentor like that? Is it mentor? Mentor? I feel like every time I get on a podcast episode, I just start mis pronunciating things and I get all jumbled up and like disheveled and nervous.'cause I'm like, what am I saying? Am I speaking correctly? But whatever. According to Forbes, people with mentors are five times more likely to be promoted. A Harvard Business Review study also found that 84% of CEOs said mentors helped them avoid major mistakes. Love that. Cornell University had a study that said mentorship increases career satisfaction by 20%. Love that. I'm always looking to be more satisfied in life. I don't know about y'all. And from a brain science perspective,'cause we always have to talk about the brain science, right? That's like my favorite part. Neuroplasticity epigenetics, all those things. Everything Joe Dis penza that teaches I am a huge fan of. When it comes to the actual, like neurological side of things, humans actually learn the fastest through social modeling. So our brains literally learn to mirror the people that we look up to. That is why education is built in the format that it is, and. Yeah. I just feel like that one, for me personally really hit home and really resonated with me because I was like, you know what? You're right. Like I do learn the best by modeling other people. Like when I am learning a new job and I'm watching like at my, at my job, for example, when I'm learning the ropes about how to sell at New Breed, I watch other people's calls and then I like end up adopting the way that they relay information and say things and strategize their selling. And I just like, I find that that's so much more valuable than just like reading something or like watching a basic video that's teaching you like you actually want to see it in action. So that your brain can like fully absorb it, fully process it, and then replicate it. And then from an emotional benefit perspective, because of course mental health, we love emotions here. Being mentored actually has been found to reduce feelings of isolation. Shocker. Which is obviously super, super crucial and just a major like benefit when you're trying to level up. I also think that nowadays, most people work remote. Maybe they're remote. In school or whatever it may be. Like, it's just very common nowadays, and I feel like the loneliness epidemic and the isolation epidemic has very much increased as a result of the pandemic and all those things. But, regardless of whether or not you work in an office or not, like. Having that community to guide you with whatever you're trying to be mentored on, obviously helps with feelings of isolation way more than if you were to just go home and study on YouTube alone in a corner for four hours. So really value that. I don't know about my listeners here, but I get really inspired and jazzed up by people's energy when I'm around the right people. Like it gives me a lot of energy that I can't really replicate anywhere else. Definitely not something to overlook. Let's talk about my personal take on mentorship. I have invested in a lot of different ways that I could be mentored over the years. Obviously first and foremost was education. So I went to, graduate school and undergraduate, aside from that, I've also invested in a lot of various programs and things like that to teach me new skills. And all of those were mentorship programs. So, about four years ago, I invested in a mentorship type program that was surrounding operations consulting and tech consulting. And that program helped me completely level up in my career. It got me a much higher paying role immediately right off the bat, like it was so worth it. And like I said, at the time, I think it was like seven to$10,000 that I was investing, and I literally was dead broke, like dead broke, maxing out, credit cards type broke, and I did it anyways. I ended up like taking out a loan to pay it, and I'm so glad that I did because that led me to be able to be self-employed for the first time. So I ventured into self-employment for. Probably like 10 months. And then I kind of just didn't really like it. I didn't really have the foundation that I was looking for, and so I wanted to go back into being on a team. So again, just talking about being around people that can educate you and inspire you and all those things, it actually really is important. I was fully self-employed and then I was like, wait, this isn't really working for me. So I'm trying to find that balance between having freedom in life and also working alongside a really strong team and I think I found that, which is awesome. But it's not easy to find and it's obviously a journey. But anyways, that program, the integrators program that I invested into, again, immediately opened new doors for me. Like right off the bat, I was able to put that accreditation on my LinkedIn and that I was also able to show that I was doing independent consulting and I was succeeding at it. And so from there, like all the doors that opened from roles perspectives, as I stepped into a new full-time role. It was just like night and day. So I mean, I wouldn't change that for the world no matter how long it took me to pay off the debt, no matter how uncomfortable it made me, like it was worth it for sure. And like that mentorship program was not super long. I wanna say it was like four months maybe or three months or something like that. I can't remember since it's been four years now. But regardless of the fact that it was a short term interaction, it genuinely changed the trajectory of my life so much. I cannot speak today, guys. I'm sorry. It was just so, so worth it. So from there I've done a couple other like minor things where I wanted to dabble in trying certain things when it comes to selling online and affiliate marketing and, and things like that. So I've dabbled in much smaller mentorship programs that were like$300, a thousand dollars, you name it. So I've done lots of things and I've been learning lots of skills over the years to try to figure out like, what do I like to do? Like what am I most passionate about? Where can I get the most income generated from? Just really trying to learn and experience things in life. And the most recent one that I've done is another, high ticket investment or, you know, large value investment that I've done, which is investing in a coaching and mentorship program just for basically like having elite coaching to have a winning mindset and to level up to that next level of success in life because I feel like it's been four years since I did anything like that, and I feel like I've been somewhat stagnant since then. I took a big jump when it came to my income and my job opportunities, and then they've slowly been increasing over the four years. But I want to take that next jump and be an absolute rockstar, you know? And just have the absolute best mentality be a winner, be constantly closing, constantly reaching my goals, that is what I want. I wanna wake up every single day and be a fricking winner and know that I have that mentality to keep me winning, because that really is the basis of your success is your mentality and your mindset towards life, the challenges you face, and just who you are and your capabilities. I'm very excited about that. I actually just made this investment last week, so I'm brand new into the coaching program and I already feel like a different person. Honestly, the fact that I'm back here week two, filming the podcast, despite everything that I'm going through and the chaos that I've been feeling on an emotional basis is something that I'm really proud of. So that says a lot. One week into coaching and I'm already a different person. Like I actually took so much out of that first week of modules and lessons that I started this week on a completely different foot. It's just crazy. Like genuinely night and day. Through a week of coaching. So if that doesn't sell it for you, I don't know what will. I mean, again, everybody's different. This is my personal experience, but I just, I thought it was crazy because again, I was really nervous to make that investment. It was like almost$10,000 and you know, that's just like, I posted about this on LinkedIn yesterday, but I am not in the most financially abundant state in my life at this moment because I just bought a horse, so that's expensive. My ex-boyfriend moved out, so I'm back to paying the bills on my own and I just started a new job. So I'm in that lull where I'm not making as much as I was before because I'm not earning as much commission.'cause I'm like obviously onboarding. And so there's just been like this lull and it's been really uncomfortable and it's really made me so frustrated. But it's also made me itch and want to get to that next level where it's like, okay, once I get into the motions of, of having a quota and getting commission at this new role, like I wanna be literally kicking ass. I wanna be kicking ass, taking names and rolling in cash. Sorry, not sorry. That's what I want is financial freedom and the ability to take care of the people that I love and just like do good in the world with money and also live a comfortable lifestyle. Like who doesn't want that? So that's where I'm at. I felt the fear and I did it anyways. I took a giant leap into the unknown and I invested that money that I do not have because I know it's gonna come back 10 times multiplied at some point. And whenever that is, I do not care. It will be worth it. Now I wanna say that the advice that I'm giving can be a little bit, what's the word I'm looking for? Like, controversial Because I am sharing with you guys that I'm adding debt by purchasing these things, but I just have to be honest and tell my truth and tell my story remind y'all that you can do that and you can actually be okay and still get out of it and still have a good credit score and it not be the end of the world. It's obviously uncomfortable and it's not fun, but creditors are there for a reason. Loans are there for a reason. Like who cares? It's good for the economy, so whatever. And also if you just never have the money to get there or to make that investment, then how are you gonna get there? If you're not willing to have an uncomfortable period where you have some debt and you have to pinch pennies a little bit and just be a little bit more uncomfortable for a certain period of time in order to get to that next level of success, then you honestly don't deserve it, in my opinion. If you're not willing to take the leap, make the investment, do the scary thing, do the hard thing, you don't deserve it. Because life doesn't just hand you things on a silver platter. Like it's a lot of work from a mental perspective and then an action based perspective. So that is really a big kind of reflective moment for me, I guess, on how my mindset has shifted since I invested in my mentor literally a week ago. But I'm telling you the value that I got out of just that first week was insane, and I just. You cannot put a price tag on that. And then going back to the YouTube studies and the Google studies or whatever, there are so many things that I've learned in all of my mentorship programs that YouTube and Googling could not teach me and would not teach me. And again, that has a lot to do with the social modeling and how we learn as humans. And then also just giving somebody something in exchange for them, sharing their success story and their success strategy because people are obviously willing to share a lot on the internet to help drive business into whatever it is that they're trying to sell or whatever it is that they're considered a subject matter expert on. But you still have to give something to get something, right? So it's like I'm not gonna get everything that I need to learn about, being the best closer or the best saleswoman ever. By just studying YouTube, like the good stuff, the good tidbits, the really worthwhile, valuable tidbits are going to be behind a paywall, most likely, unless you're lucky enough to be like my mentor who grew up and studied alongside Bob Proctor for the majority of his life. So, like, in some ways, you may say, that was handed to him on a silver platter. I don't believe that. I think that people can be given opportunities and just completely blow them and waste them. But there's always a chance that you may be the daughter or the family member or the friend of somebody who is a huge mentor that's very successful, and then your story will be different. And if that's your story. Claps for you. I love that for you. Last couple things I wanna talk about is really how to find a mentor. Something that I had to realize is that mentors won't always find you. Sometimes you actually have to find them and hire them like I have been sharing. There's really like an endless amount of avenues out there to find that. And to give some context for mine, I found several of mine on YouTube, one of'em on TikTok. And the one that I'm working with now, I found him through Bob Proctor because I've been a study of Bob Proctor since 2021, around when I made that first leap into investing into mentorship, because I learned from Bob Proctor in 2021 for the first time about how important mentorship was. So I immediately invested into that mentorship program that I thought would take me to the next level and did take me to the next level for my career. And it's been great. Take it from me again, a girl who did not have the money to make it work, but made it work and would do it again a million times over. And then I would say just another like little tidbit of advice I'll give is when you're reaching out to people. If you are, just be really clear about what it is that you're looking for, and obviously try to be respectful of their time by not sending them a novel. And then also just, being understanding if you don't get a response, like not everybody's gonna respond to you, especially if you're dealing with somebody that's like an influencer or whatever it may be. So yeah. And then the last thing is paid versus unpaid mentorships. I know that I touched on this already, but I just want to again, highlight the fact that both are extremely valuable. In terms of just what you're gonna get out of them. I really hope that everyone at some point in their lives can find that if that's what they want. So I hope that this episode was helpful in some way or another. So thank you so much and I hope you have a wonderful rest of your week, wherever this finds you. I love you and yeah, can't wait to talk to you guys next week. Bye.