The Hardcore Therapist

The Hardcore Therapist 90.5- Why Do We Stay Loyal to Our Suffering?

Sarah

Why do we stay loyal to our suffering—even when it hurts us?

In this episode of The Hardcore Therapist, I unpacks the hidden contracts we make with our pain and explores why letting go can feel like a threat instead of a relief. From childhood trauma to cultural conditioning, we explore the deep roots of emotional loyalty to suffering—and how it shows up in our lives: toxic jobs, self-sabotage, and relationships that mirror old wounds.

I dives into the psychology of staying stuck, the false sense of control that comes from familiar chaos, and why healing can trigger grief, identity loss, and fear of the unknown. This isn't about blaming yourself—it’s about understanding yourself with compassion.