Ep 80 Money as a Mirror: How Your Beliefs About Worth and Wealth Shape Your Bank Account

In this deeply reflective and empowering episode, Lori Gouhin invites you to explore your relationship with money in a completely new light.

Drawing inspiration from The Soul of Money by Lynne Twist, Lori dives into how money mirrors our internal beliefs—our self-trust, sense of worth, boundaries, and the stories we carry from childhood. This isn’t just about money mindset. It’s about reclaiming your power, presence, and peace around money so you can stop chasing and start choosing.

Through personal insight, practical questions, and mindset-shifting truths, Lori helps you unravel the scarcity scripts holding you back—and begin living from sufficiency and alignment right now.

This conversation is an invitation to stop outsourcing your wholeness to a number and instead redefine what wealth truly means for you.

Episode Highlights:

● Why your relationship with money mirrors your relationship with yourself
 ● The hidden beliefs shaping your money patterns
 ● How scarcity shows up as comparison, undercharging, and self-editing
 ● The difference between sufficiency and settling
 ● What Lynn Twist means by “what we appreciate, appreciates”
 ● Shifting from chasing money to choosing alignment
 ● Six powerful self-reflection questions to change your money story
 ● Weekly Challenge: Ask yourself what you would do differently if you already had all the money you desire—and begin doing a version of that today

Money isn’t your identity, and it isn’t your worth. It’s feedback, energy, and a reflection of what you believe. When you see it clearly, you can finally lead from within.

Book Referenced: The Soul of Money by Lynne Twist
 Link to book

Podcast Episode Referenced:  Ep 79 Stop Playing the Emotional Games That Are Holding You Back

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Transcript

[00:00:00] that doesn't mean you stop wanting more, but it does mean you stop outsourcing your sense of wholeness to some magical number. You start measuring wealth and alignment, not only dollars, because true wealth is resourced and rooted in how you feel while you build something meaningful. Hello my friends. I am so glad that you are here with me today because today I want to talk about our relationship with money, [00:01:00] but I don't want you to assume it's going to be just another money mindset episode because it's not.

[00:01:05] This is about the soul of money. Many years ago I read a book called The Soul of Money by Lynn Twist, and it was so impactful and it, wasn't because it gave financial advice, It was because it helped me see money as something much deeper than numbers or income goals or anything like that. It showed me how money reflects our values, our fears, and our level of trust in ourselves and in life.

[00:01:35] And so I recently pulled it off of my bookshelf again. To revisit it, and then I wanted to share some of the ideas in it with you, hopefully it will resonate as well. so I want you to think about your own money story and how that story might be holding you back or distracting you or driving you in ways that you haven't even realized or questioned.

[00:01:57] And so let's start with something [00:02:00] that I think a lot of people don't admit out loud, and that's the tension that we might feel when we're around people who either have a lot of money or maybe even just more money than we do. Sometimes we can be inspired by them. Sometimes we might be annoyed by them.

[00:02:18] Sometimes we feel small and sometimes we just maybe wanna figure out what they did to get there so that we can do it too. I know that's one of my questions. I'm always like, what did they do? How do they get their money? Because I'm always so curious, but here's what's really going on. That kind of a scenario when we, are comparing ourselves or feeling some kind of tension when we're around people that either have a lot of money or maybe more money than we do, we've been conditioned to believe that money equals power, that it equals influence, value, and that someone with more money must be doing life better than we are.

[00:02:58] And that belief reveals [00:03:00] a whole lot more about us than it does about them, because underneath that admiration or maybe intimidation is often a scarcity script. The belief that there's a limited amount of success or money or security to go around, and that if they have it, then there's less for us.

[00:03:19] And I always like to reassure people that. Someone else's piece of the pie does not mean that your pie is smaller. There's enough pie for everybody but that belief. Of that scarcity, that can quietly shape every decision that you make, because if you're in business, it'll keep you from raising your prices.

[00:03:39] It'll make you question if you belong in certain rooms. It'll have you comparing yourself to others and thinking that you're behind It also might show up as self-editing, a very subtle self-editing where you shrink or you defer. And you don't even realize that you've made yourself smaller to avoid feeling [00:04:00] exposed.

[00:04:00] And I want you to catch that because if we don't name it, we start chasing money. Really kind of like as a proxy for worth. We assume that more money will finally make us feel valid or safe or respected. But if you're still running that same old story, no amount of money will be enough to override it.

[00:04:21] And while scarcity. Yes, it's about what's in your bank account. It's also about what you believe is possible and whether you trust yourself to handle more and still stay in integrity with who you are. And so if scarcity is built on fear and lack, then sufficiency the opposite. I would say is built on presence and attention and gratitude.

[00:04:46] In other words, real conscious recognition of what you already have and how you are using it. In the book, Lynn, write that what we appreciate appreciates. It sounds simple, but it's [00:05:00] really one of the most transformative truths that you can internalize because most people don't realize that they're walking around with enough. More than enough. And because they're so distracted by what they don't have, they don't even use what's already available to them. And I've seen this with coaching clients, with creatives, even in myself. You have time, but you give it away to things that you don't care about.

[00:05:24] You have money, but you spend it maybe trying to impress people you don't even like. You have a talent, but you keep second guessing it while watching somebody else quote unquote, do it better. Sufficiency doesn't mean settling. I wanna make sure that you understand that. It means operating from a place of clarity and alignment, not grasping.

[00:05:45] It means asking how can I use what I already have with intention instead of something like, what do I need to do? Or what do I need to get before I can start? Because when you begin to use what you have and you [00:06:00] use it well, it actually expands. Your resources will multiply when you respect them. The more you are grateful, the more things you have to be grateful for.

[00:06:11] Opportunities will begin to show up. When you stop leaking, your energy and creativity will flow. When you stop obsessing over the outcomes and when that happens, it's not magic, it's alignment, and it's deeply uncomfortable at first because it challenges the conditioning that says you need to earn your right to feel successful, creative, or even safe.

[00:06:32] But when you stop chasing and you start choosing. I assure you, things will begin to shift. You stopped asking for permission. You stop hustling for scraps of validation, and you stop waiting for some future moment where it'll finally be enough. Because again, when you appreciate what you have and you put it to work in service of what matters, it will grow.

[00:06:57] Whether you believe it or not, your [00:07:00] relationship with money is really just a reflection of your relationship with yourself. It mirrors how you see your worth, how you set your boundaries,how much you trust your decisions, how safe you feel being seen. Money is not the problem.

[00:07:17] It's the messenger. And I know sometimes we wanna shoot the messenger because we don't like what it's showing us. Think about it. If you are in business and constantly undercharging, it's not just a pricing issue, it's a self trust issue. Or if you avoid looking at your finances, that's not just disorganization.

[00:07:37] It's often tied to shame. And if you feel resentful that others seem to have it, quote unquote easier, Maybe what's actually happening is that you haven't made peace with your own pace or your own path. And when you start to see money as a mirror, you will stop asking, how do I make more?

[00:07:55] and instead you start asking yourself some tough questions like, [00:08:00] what is this showing me about how I see myself? Or what if I decided I'm allowed to receive? Or maybe what am I unconsciously pushing away?

[00:08:10] And now, before you start playing the yes but game, and if you don't know what I mean by that, listen to episode 79 last week. I know thatyou might think that you're doing all the right things. You're journaling, maybe you're visualizing, you're showing up, you feel like you're doing the work daily.

[00:08:27] You feel aligned, but the money still isn't coming in the way that you want it to. That doesn't necessarily mean that you're doing something wrong. It just means the mirror is asking for a deeper level of honesty on your part. Sometimes it's revealing a mismatch, not between your effort and your outcome, but between your stated desires and your energetic agreements, for example.

[00:08:53] Are you still secretly uncomfortable with the idea of being too successful? Or maybe are you holding [00:09:00] onto guilt about charging more because money feels like power and you don't wanna seem greedy? Or maybe are you subconsciously linking more money with more responsibility, more pressure, or more exposure?

[00:09:13] Because you can't override those hidden beliefs by saying the right affirmations or posting more content on social media. You have to be willing to look at the internal rules that you are still playing by and decide whether or not they still serve you, because money will never give you an identity, but it will show you what you already believe and if what you believe.

[00:09:37] If what you want are out of sync, that tension will show up in your bank account again and again and again until you are willing to realign.

[00:09:50] So now let's take a minute and talk about what wealth actually is, because most people, I would say, are chasing a version of it that they haven't even defined for [00:10:00] themselves. We think wealth means financial freedom or options, or being able to relax, and while it most certainly can. For a lot of people, the pursuit of wealth becomes a never ending cycle of proving and comparing and striving without ever stopping to ask, what am I really after?

[00:10:19] And here's something Lynn Twist points out in the book that really stuck with me. Some of the most generous people that she's ever met we're not wealthy by traditional standards. They didn't have overflowing bank accounts and they didn't have fancy titles, but they knew. What mattered to them, and because of that, they were abundant, not because of what they had, but because of how they related to what they had.

[00:10:45] And she also said she met billionaires who were consumed with fear. They still felt like it wasn't enough. They hoarded more than they could ever use because they didn't know what enough looked like for them. [00:11:00] So ask yourself, do you want more money? Do you want what you think more money will give you?

[00:11:06] Because if you don't define wealth for yourself, you'll absorb everyone else's definition, and that's how people end up feeling empty after hitting goals that maybe were never theirs to begin with. So here's something to try. Instead of asking, how do I make more money? Ask, what would I feel? If I had more money, is that security, creativity, maybe space, maybe influence, maybe safety, and then ask, how can I begin creating those experiences now with what I already have?

[00:11:39] And that doesn't mean you stop wanting more, but it does mean you stop outsourcing your sense of wholeness to some magical number. You start measuring wealth and alignment, not only dollars, because true wealth is resourced and rooted in how you feel while you build something meaningful. And [00:12:00] so let's bring it back to you because if this conversation is only conceptual, it really won't change anything.

[00:12:06] You'll nod along. Maybe you'll even feel inspired, but then you'll go right back to your old patterns, and I would hate that for you. So here are a few questions that you can sit with, not to fix anything, but to reveal what's already there. And these are the kind of questions that can really quietly change your life if you're willing to be honest with yourself.

[00:12:27] The first one is, what's your earliest memory about money and what did you learn from it, both explicitly and unconsciously? The next one, do you believe you have enough right now? And if not, what would be enough? And who gave you that definition? Number three, where are you convincing yourself that you are in alignment? But if you're really being honest, your actions tell a different story. Number four, where are you doing the work but not really [00:13:00] believing it will work for you? And number five, what emotions do you associate with having more money?

[00:13:07] Is it relief power, guilt, pressure? Visibility. Your answers here are important because those emotions might be why you're blocking money. And finally, number six, if you had all the money you desired right now, what would you do differently? And then ask, what parts of that could I start doing right now, even with your current resources?

[00:13:33] Listen, I am not saying to give up on your financial goals. Wanting more is okay. Ambition is okay. It's great, but when your identity and your peace are tied to a number, you give money. Way too much control. You don't need to wait for more to start acting like someone who trusts themselves. You don't need to earn your right to feel resourced, powerful, or at peace.

[00:13:57] You get to choose how you show [00:14:00] up, and money responds to that. It's not the other way around. And so to wrap it up, let's end with this. Money is energy. It's not your identity. It's not your value. It's not a verdict on how good you are, how talented you are, how in alignment you are. It's a tool. A powerful one, yes, but still just a tool.

[00:14:22] And like any tool, its impact depends on who's using it and why. If your money patterns are not matching your values, don't shame yourself. Just get curious, ask better questions and make decisions that actually reflect the version of you that you want to become, not the version that's trying to prove something.

[00:14:44] Because when you start treating money as a mirror. As feedback and as energy, not a scorecard, I promise. everything shifts. You stop waiting for some external sign that you're doing it right, and you just start leading. You start owning, and you [00:15:00] start choosing. So my challenge to you is this, sit with these questions, journal through them, talk about them, and if you want someone to help you figure out what's really going on behind your money patterns.

[00:15:12] I can help you with that. You can reach out, book a strategy session or just message me. This conversation is really about getting honest and that more than anything is what is going to create real change for you