Ep 102 How To Face Your Fears, Choose Courage and Go After Your Dreams

This episode will inspire you to make choices that feel alive, real, and deeply personal.

In this week’s episode of The ARTwork of YOU, Lori Gouhin explores the kind of courage that doesn’t make headlines but quietly changes lives. The kind that happens in the privacy of your own mind, when no one’s watching. The kind that says, “I’ll try, even if I’m not sure it’ll work.”

Through honest reflection, lived experience, and actionable insights, Lori unpacks why fear often disguises itself as logic, why waiting to “feel ready” keeps us stuck, and how every small act of courage rewires your sense of identity. From neuroscience to nervous system wisdom, she reminds us that hesitation isn’t a flaw, it’s biology and that courage begins when you choose to move anyway.

This episode is an empowering invitation to recognize where fear is running the show, to stop waiting for perfect timing, and to start building the kind of self-trust that creates lasting change.

Episode Highlights

• Why “I’m not ready yet” is often fear dressed up as logic
  
  
  
• The science behind hesitation and how your nervous system resists change
  
  
  
• How to shrink fear by defining one clear first step instead of waiting for the whole plan
  
  
  
• The importance of documenting courageous moments to build proof of self-trust
  
  
  
• Why courage isn’t about eliminating fear but normalizing discomfort
  
  
  
• How anchoring your choices to your values not outcomes builds resilience
  
  
  
• A powerful reminder that the calendar doesn’t decide when, you do

Courage isn’t a personality trait, it's a choice you make again and again. Whether you’re starting a creative project, launching a business, or simply ready to stop waiting for the “right time,” this episode will show you how to move from thinking about it to actually doing it.

Thank you for sharing your time with me and remember to show up in your life like the masterpiece you are because YOU are the ARTwork!!!

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Transcript

Lori Gouhin: [00:00:00] Those feelings aren't proof that your idea is wrong. They're your nervous system saying this is unfamiliar. Are we safe around here? And what's interesting, and also tricky, is that the fear rarely sounds like fear. It dresses itself up, right? like logic. Hello my friends. I am so glad that you are here with me today because today I wanna talk about courage. And so as you know, we've just started the third quarter of [00:01:00] 2025, and if you're like most people that I know, myself included, you started this year probably with ideas and goals or changes that you wanted to make, and maybe some of them you've already tackled.

Others, you've been kind of circling around telling yourself you'll get to them when things slow down or when you have more clarity, maybe when you have more money or when the timing is better, et cetera. You know, all the things. But here's what I often notice and the reason why I'm recording this episode today.

It's probably not all of those things that I just mentioned that you're missing, and what it most likely is, is courage. This is the time of the year when I would say a lot of people quietly decide it's quote unquote too late. They look at the calendar, they see how fast time is moving, and they think something like, I'll just wait until the new year, and then they give up or create a very reasonable sounding justification for waiting things like it's almost the [00:02:00] holidays.

Things are busy. I need a fresh start in January. But if we're honest, most of those reasons aren't really about timing. They're about fear. Fear that stepping into something right now might be uncomfortable, might not work, and might expose you to failure. And believe me, I get it. I'm feeling it too right now.

I have ideas that I've been sitting on, things that I know I want to try, things that I can picture so clearly, but I've hesitated. Not because I don't know what to do next, but because doing it would require me to step into uncertainty. And so that's what we're going to talk about today. We're going to look at the real reason of why we stall, not because we need another plan or more research or a perfect moment or anything like that, but because courage is uncomfortable. Yet, it's the one thing that moves us from quote unquote thinking about it to actually doing it. I think a lot [00:03:00] of times when most of us think about courage, we picture something more dramatic, like running into a burning building or making a big public stand on something or doing something wildly risky.

But the kind of courage that actually changes your life is usually pretty quiet. In other words, it's the decision you make in the privacy of your own mind before anyone else even knows it's saying to yourself, I'm going to try this, even if there's no guarantee that it'll work. And so courage. Isn't the absence of fear and it's not a bolt of confidence that suddenly hits you outta nowhere.

Courage is what you choose before you feel ready. I like to think of it less as a personality trait and more as a conscious decision. It's not something you either have or you don't. It's a choice that you make to step towards something that you want, even while fear is making its case for staying exactly where you are.

In [00:04:00] fact, waiting to feel ready, I would say is one of the biggest ways we stay stuck because readiness is really an illusion. It's another story that your brain tells. And I think every single courageous decision you make, reshapes how you see yourself, and not just because of the action you take, but because of the identity that you build.

Each time you do something that you were afraid of, you're telling yourself a new story. And it might be something like, I'm the kind of person who tries. I'm the kind of person who goes for it, even when it's uncertain. And that is how self-trust is built. Not by waiting for certainty, but by proving to yourself that you can act without it.

Most hesitation isn't about needing more skills or better timing. It's about this moment, the one where you decide to cross that invisible line between safety and possibility. Now I wanna emphasize that the hesitation you feel, it's not a personal flaw, [00:05:00] it's biology doing what it is designed to do. Your brain's first job is to keep you alive, not make you feel fulfilled.

It's wired to scan for danger and to prefer the familiar and to conserve energy. And so when you consider doing something new, your brain doesn't see growth. It sees risk and risk to the primitive part of your brain equals potential threat, so it sends up protective signals like fear, doubt, overthinking, procrastination.

Those feelings aren't proof that your idea is wrong. They're your nervous system saying something like, hold on, this is unfamiliar. Are we safe around here? And what's interesting, and I would say also tricky, is that the fear rarely sounds like fear. It dresses itself up, right? Kind of like logic.

Something like, well, maybe I should wait until I have more experience. Maybe I should just read one more book. Maybe I should make sure this is [00:06:00] perfect before anyone sees it and

these feel rational, but they're safety strategies. Our brain also hates identity shifts. Doing something courageous, especially something creative or entrepreneurial, threatens the version of you that's known and safe. If you act, you might succeed, you might fail. You might become someone new, and that change equals uncertainty, and uncertainty triggers your alarm system.

This is why courage feels heavy, because you're going against your brain's default programming. You're not lacking willpower or anything like that. What you're doing is bumping into a kind of built in safety feature. Knowing that matters because once you recognize the voice of self-protection, masquerading as reason, you can decide whether to obey it or to move away from it.

And I also wanna share, and this is very important, every time you hesitate, You're not just pausing an idea. You're [00:07:00] training yourself to believe that action requires perfect conditions. In other words, you're teaching your brain that fear gets the final vote. What starts as a short delay, something like, I'll wait until I have more clarity, or until things slow down or until the new year, it slowly solidifies into a pattern and each time you choose safety, the story, I'm not ready, gains more evidence and the next leap will feel bigger and scarier and more complicated.

You tell yourself that you're buying time, but you're actually buying distance. Distance from your goal and distance from the version of yourself who believes you can do hard things. And waiting also creates, I would say, an emotional weight because the idea doesn't just sit there silently, right? It nags at you.

It becomes heavier, more intimidating, more tangled with guilt. And what if? And by the time you circle back, you're not just facing the action [00:08:00] itself. You're facing months of self-doubt that you've accidentally built. Here's another important thing. When you delay long enough, you begin to shrink the dream just to make it more comfortable, and you probably tell yourself it wasn't that important.

And you lower the stakes so you don't have to feel the discomfort of going for it. That's how brilliant ideas quietly die. Not with one big no, but with a slow erosion of your belief. And the longer you wait, the louder the fear becomes and the more courage it will take later. So acting now even imperfectly, keeps the fear smaller in the path to your success alive.

If waiting doesn't work and fear rarely goes away on its own, how do we actually build courage? Well, I like to think of it less like hype and more like design. You don't need to be fearless. You need to structure your life so that [00:09:00] acting with fear becomes normal. So I would say number one. Decide first and prepare second.

Most people try to prepare their way into courage. They gather enough proof to finally feel safe, but the safer move is often the opposite. Make the decision, then create your plan. Say, I'm doing this, and then line up the details afterwards. Otherwise, you'll be planning forever. Number two, shrink the unknown, not the dream.

Fear grows in empty space. And what I mean by that is when you're just kind of dwelling, right, the fear starts to grow and grow. And when you're uncertain and you don't know what to do, so define the very first visible step, not the whole staircase. Maybe that looks like emailing a few people or publishing a post or testing the product.

If you're creating one with one buyer. You don't need a 50 step action plan. You just need to [00:10:00] remove that lack of clarity from the first step. 

Number three, build proof of self-trust. Each courageous act, no matter how small is deposit into the quote unquote, I can do hard things, bank, track it, write it down, and remind yourself that you acted without certainty and you survived. Believe me, confidence is not found.

It's documented. Number four. Borrow nervous system safety. And what I mean by that is that sometimes the best way to act courageously is to create safe conditions around the act. And that might mean talking it through with someone you trust, hiring a coach or having a support system so that the fear doesn't

feel isolating, because courage doesn't mean it has to be solo.

 And number five. Anchor to your values, not outcomes. If your courage is only tied to results, the fear will win whenever the outcome [00:11:00] is uncertain. So connect the action to who you want to be. I'm the kind of person who honors ideas when they show up. I'm the kind of person who moves, even when I'm uncertain.

Courage becomes easier when you stop negotiating with fear and start normalizing action 

the goal is not to eliminate discomfort. It's to make discomfort more like a familiar face instead of a stop sign. Again, we're stepping into the final stretch of the year, and this is the season when a lot of people quietly check out on their goals that they set back in January and they tell themselves it's too late to make any real difference, so they push that dream into next year.

But again, the clock and the calendar, they don't decide if you're done. You do. You have way more than enough time to make meaningful steps before the year ends. One decision made now can completely shift the story that you walk into January with, and instead [00:12:00] of, I didn't get to it, you can start the new year saying, I already began.

So I want you to ask yourself. What's the one move? Fear has been talking you out of what would happen if you chose courage today. Not in January, not someday, but right now. And if that next step feels. Too big, or you want help turning it from a brave idea into a clear plan, I can help. I offer 60 minute strategy sessions where we define your real next move and build the kind of structure and accountability that makes courage actionable.

You can book your session at www.theartworkofyou.com, or you can reach out to me via email, social media. It doesn't matter. You don't have to wait for the perfect moment. You just have to decide. And for God's sake, please, please, please do not someday your life away.

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