The MiDOViA Menopause Podcast
Welcome to The MiDOViA Menopause Podcast! Your trusted source for evidence-based, science-backed information related to menopause.
MiDOViA is dedicated to changing the narrative about menopause by educating, raising awareness and supporting women in this stage of life, both at home and in the workplace. Visit midovia.com to learn more.
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The MiDOViA Menopause Podcast
Episode 018: Rediscovering Well-Being with Sharman Ghio
Imagine trekking 450 miles to rediscover your sense of self. Join us on The MiDOViA Menopause Podcast as we chat with Sharman Ghio, a courageous well-being strategist who shares her incredible journey through the trials of the pandemic, empty nesting, her husband's chronic injury, and the heartbreaking loss of a beloved pet. Sharman’s story is a testament to resilience and the transformative power of the Camino de Santiago pilgrimage, where she found healing amidst life's chaos.
What if you could transform your life by focusing on well-being rather than just wellness? Sharman and I dive into the distinctions between these two concepts, exploring how well-being offers a holistic approach to a fulfilling life. We break down the five pillars of a well-being strategy—mind, body, spirit, financial health, community belonging, and social relationships—and share practical advice on how to proactively manage these areas. Through personal stories and actionable tips, we reveal how you can align your life with your values and energy to achieve true well-being.
Feeling exhausted from balancing multiple roles? Discover the "Totally Wise" philosophy, where Sharman and I discuss the importance of self-care and listening to our inner wisdom as we age. From scheduling necessary rest days to making thoughtful decisions, we emphasize the value of adapting routines to avoid burnout. Tune in to learn how prioritizing yourself can lead to personal growth and fulfillment, and get inspired by Sharman's wisdom and insights on maintaining well-being even amidst life’s toughest challenges.
Sharman Ghio has had a storied life, including a diverse and non-traditional path as an artist, entrepreneur, yogi, and marketing leader in the technology industry.
A Well-being Strategist, Sharman guides companies and individuals to define their vision and values and ensure alignment with growth objectives and goals. Through her Totally Wise framework, her mission is to unlock inner wisdom so that we can live in our full potential and power.
Sharman’s home base is in Seattle; however, she travels frequently while writing, hiking, exploring and practicing yoga. She can be hired for consulting, workshops, and retreats.
WEBSITES:
https://www.sharmanghio.com
LINKS:
Website: https://www.midovia.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mymidovia
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/midovia
Email Us: info@midovia.com
Welcome to The MiDOViA Menopause Podcast! Your trusted source
Welcome to the Medovia Menopause Podcast, your trusted source for evidence-based, science-backed information related to menopause. Medovia is dedicated to changing the narrative about menopause by educating, raising awareness and supporting women in this stage of life, both at home and in the workplace. Visit medoviacom to learn more home and in the workplace. Visit Medoviacom to learn more. I'm one of your hosts, april Haberman, and I'm joined by Kim Hart. We're co-founders of Medovia, certified health coaches, registered yoga teachers and midlife mamas specializing in menopause. You're listening to another episode of our podcast, where we offer expert guidance for the most transformative stage of life, bringing you real conversations, education and resources to help you overcome challenges and reach your full potential through midlife. Join us and our special guests each episode as we bring vibrant, fun and truthful conversation and let us help you have a deeper understanding of menopause. Today, we have a special guest who's going to share personal well-being strategies with us. Well-being is quite the buzzword these days and we're often at a loss of knowing where to even begin. Sharman's going to help us with that. Knowing where to even begin. Charmin's going to help us with that.
Speaker 1:Charmin Gio has had a storied life, including a diverse and non-traditional path as an artist, entrepreneur, yogi and marketing leader in the technology industry. A well-being strategist, charmin guides companies and individuals to define their values and vision and ensure alignment with growth objectives and goals. Their values and vision and ensure alignment with growth objectives and goals. Through her Totally Wise framework, her mission is to unlock inner wisdom so that we can live in our full potential and power. Sherman's host base is in Seattle, however. She travels frequently, while writing, hiking, exploring and practicing yoga. She can be hired for consulting, workshops and retreats. Take a listen.
Speaker 2:Hi, sharmin, welcome. We're so glad to have you today. Thanks, kim, I'm happy to be here. So you and I met during COVID. We were both taking a mindfulness class at Microsoft. We haven't actually met in person, but I feel like you're kindred spirits with me and that I've known you a long time. I watched you make some pretty incredible life changes over the last couple of years and adventures, and you've done some deep soul searching and would you like kind of to tell our audience about your journey and how you ended up where you are right now?
Speaker 3:Yes, I'd be happy to. It is true that during the pandemic, my husband and I were doing some daydreaming about traveling and getting away. I think a lot of us were, you know, feeling locked in our houses, so how could we think outside that? And so, when our youngest graduated high school in 2022, we made that dream come alive, and so we packed away most of our things in storage. We had a small trailer and our two dogs and ourselves, and we embarked on what we're calling the great drive about, and the intention was to just drive around the West while we worked remotely and explore and and, you know, feel free, and it was wonderful, but not without its challenges, right, I think life tends to laugh at well-made plans, right? And so, you know, we went through Montana, we also went through Utah, we spent many months in Sedona, arizona, and then we've come down to Scottsdale, and I'll just say that during that time, I didn't expect some things to pop up for me. One of them was empty nesting and, again, I referenced earlier feeling free.
Speaker 3:I'm a very independent person, although I have two children I love tremendously, and so this sense of being free when they graduated was more prominent than how might I feel about missing them, and so I did feel like I was empty nesting. There are also some things that popped up. For example, my husband is struggling with the chronic injury, and so that began to really weigh on him heavily, both physically and mentally, and so when you have a partner that's struggling with that, it is very difficult, and that went on for over a year. He ended up seeing 11 surgeons before he could be operated on. So while you're traveling about and trying to navigate all that it was really hard One of our adorable dogs was dying of cancer, and so we had to make a really tough decision to end her physical life because quality was deteriorating, and that was really tricky for us.
Speaker 3:And then I think what happened really that was the catalyst of this adventure that continued was I experienced toxicity in the workplace and this was very new for me and I was really unprepared and caught off guard by someone who was just encoded with well-being and it's a foundational pillar to who I am.
Speaker 3:I found myself extremely unwell and in fact in the emergency room, thinking I was having a heart attack. And while I sat in that emergency room I vowed that I would never again be there because of work or anything else, and so I decided I had to get out of Dodge, or out of Arizona, so to speak. So I made the decision to do the Camino de Santiago pilgrimage in Spain, and I can talk a little more about that later. But I really just needed my nervous system to be able to calm down, to reconnect with who I am and what I have to offer. And I had heard several people's account of their Camino pilgrimage, and by the third account I said all right, I think that's for me. And so I went by myself and walked 450 miles across Spain in 30 days, wow, and really reclaimed this sense of knowing and grounding and who I am, and that has been really the beginning of this stage of my life.
Speaker 2:You face your challenges by leaning in full on to your passions and to the things that were important to you. And I know I asked you about your your track and you like decided with just a few weeks that you were going to you. And I know I asked you about your your track and you like decided with just a few weeks that you were going to go and took off and did it and trusted that the universe would take care of you, which is just amazing to me and so brave. But what did you change during, you know, after going through all of those things, and and how are you moving forward? What are some of the decisions that you've made and those aha moments that you're like? This is who I am and this is what I need right now.
Speaker 3:Yes, I think, when you make a quick decision like I did and I could have gone anywhere, really I could have gone to Bali and sat on the beach, right, I could have had a luxurious vacation. But, knowing who I am, I knew that I had some things to work through and that was not going to be sitting on a beach, because I was going to ruminate, right, and that wasn't going to solve where I was at. So I packed everything on my back. I carried about 16 pounds on my back. I made no advance reservations other than my flight to and from and, it's true, I was provided by and there's a spirit there which was tremendous with the other pilgrims and other people. So I would say some of the key things and learnings I had was just simplicity, really living simply.
Speaker 3:There's so many things, of course, in the Western world that we think we can't live without and, in fact, when I was on the trail, I would ask some of the Europeans there because many people from Europe I would say what's your perception of Americans, what do you think of us? And it was always big cars and big houses and lots of stuff, and I thought, okay, that's an interesting perspective. So living simply was one. I think also this bond that I have with friends and family, and I've always really cherished that. But, as I mentioned before, I've been very independent. I'm an only child.
Speaker 3:I spend a lot of time by myself, but I found that once I was then removed from all those comforts, I really really treasured the bonds I have with friends and family and I would think, lastly, I just really had this greater sense of knowing and wisdom and grounding around what I have to offer, like my unique gifts that I have to offer, and just know that they're not for everyone, but the people that they are for will be attracted to that, they will find me, find one another, and so I just stand very grounded in that today and it feels like a sense of ease versus a sense of struggle or striving, and so I just flip that around a little bit.
Speaker 1:You can't please everyone all the time right and just to receive whoever comes your way and accepts you as you are is beautiful. You know well-being if you think about self-care, think about well-being as you're talking, and well-being is getting a lot of press right now and I'm just curious how you would define well-being and wellness.
Speaker 3:To me, the difference between the two is wellness describes a healthy lifestyle, so that could be the products and services that you use in your life to promote a healthy lifestyle what you eat, what you drink, how you exercise, meditate, you might use an app, so these are all the things we have to promote a healthy lifestyle.
Speaker 3:Well-being, on the other hand, is a holistic view of a well-lived life. So if you were to look back at your life, maybe, or forward, and you could connect your energy and your actions and the time you spent with the things that mattered most to you, would that align or would it be misaligned? And it's a very unique perspective for everybody, because some people are going to treasure things more over other folks. So what I help people and companies do is try to understand what are our values, what are our principles, what are our core guiding lights and how do we ensure that we spend more time and flow in those paths of energy versus outside of that? And very subjective, very unique, and that's what I hope I can help people determine and discover for themselves.
Speaker 3:Just again, I talked about being in the river or being in that sense of ease. It's a hard thing to describe, but when you feel it you know it's right and that's well-being or well-lived life to me that's a, that's wellbeing or well-lived life to me, and you talk about being planful, about having a wellbeing strategy.
Speaker 2:You know, like I was trying to figure out when I was you know, I'm following you on social media like what do you mean by that and how do I get one? And and like do I buy it off the shelf? I mean, you know I want one.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I want one.
Speaker 1:A wellbeing strategy for everybody Right.
Speaker 2:I'll just be. Oprah about that Download for $25 from your website. We're good to go, but yeah, no, seriously. I love the concept. What's a well-being strategy and what should our listeners think about when they're kind of trying to create their own?
Speaker 3:I'll give you a sense of what that is for me, and I'd love to hear from you both as well, and if you have practices that you a sense of what that is for me, and I'd love to hear from you both as well and if you have practices that you're doing in your life that helps you. But I would describe it as this. It's this you know the analogy of putting on your oxygen mask first before you help others. And I look at it that way If we take care of ourselves fully, we're then better able to take care of the people in the communities around us. And so, rather than be reactive to, let's say, your nervous system getting out of whack or your physical or mental health deteriorating, can you put together a plan, a framework, a strategy, if you will, that helps you align it across, and I have five pillars I talk about. You align it across and I have five pillars I talk about.
Speaker 3:So one is the whole self. So to me that's mind, body, spirit. The second is around financial well-being how well you manage your money. The third is around community. Do you feel a sense of belonging where you live? There is career well-being, do you get energized by the work that you do.
Speaker 3:And then, finally, there's social and that's meaningful friendships in your life, and so I think at times in our life we might be thinking more about those than others. But I also compare it to this game of whack-a-mole, right? Are you doing whack-a-mole around your own well-being and you're taking care of one thing and then something else sprouts up, and so you're always in this state of like fight or flight or reaction, and while I can't be perfect all the time, at least if you've identified, across these five pillars, things that you might do could be one thing right, it could be I'm going to go to bed at 10 pm each night right, it doesn't have to be difficult, it just gives it this certainty and this system and this framework that you begin to apply to your life on a regular basis, and then they become habits all of the time.
Speaker 1:I think you're right. It's that whack-a-mole right, like today it might be this and tomorrow. I'm focused on this and it's proactive versus reactive what I'm hearing, and I love that, yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, are there things that you both are doing that you feel like fall into those categories, or maybe categories that might be lacking, that you're like, oh, I'm, I'm, I'm relatively high in my social well-being, but oh, my financial well-being, right, and so that's how I think people are looking at it, and I'd be curious to learn how you all are looking at that or managing that in your life.
Speaker 2:Well, it's interesting that you asked that question, because financial well-being has been one of those I don't know things hanging over me, and this year my husband and I found a financial planner and we're making plans and it doesn't feel as daunting anymore. Right, I have the most amazing friend group who has supported me from, you know, in every aspect of my life that I cannot imagine not having. And then, you know, I meditate every day and practice yoga on a regular basis and I walk and I walk and I walk and I walk and I walk. Those are the things that I would say I would put on my wellbeing plan.
Speaker 2:But there are times when I feel extra stress that I sometimes forget about those things, those extra little things that I'm like, oh, I'm, I'm. I'm sort of notorious for saying just put your feet up the wall, Like sometimes when I feel that extra cortisol hit, I just put my feet up the wall and I remember that. But there's other days where you, if you have a plan, then you're like, oh, this is what I do now. That's kind of what I'm hearing from you when, when that hits April, I know you have, you have regular practices too. Yeah, I know you have regular practices too.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I do and they're very similar to what Kim just noted as well. But I started getting up at the crack of dawn when I had babies, because my babies unfortunately got up at the crack of dawn, but I still get up before the sun comes up. So I have that time and I pray and I do my journaling and I could spend hours doing that in the morning to just center myself. I walk, kim, and I don't walk at the same time. We're kind of opposite schedules, but I walk. I have my yoga practice, which I think keeps me sane. I know it keeps me sane, it keeps me breathing, it keeps me sane, it keeps me breathing, it keeps me rooted and centered.
Speaker 1:It's interesting that you noted you know, everyone has their own history really that they bring to the table as you look at the wellness plan or well-being plan. And it's true, you know the financial piece. I'm right there with Kim let's plan for the future, because we're not getting any younger priority right now. However, I avoid that and that has a lot to do with my upbringing and my childhood and I know that, but I still avoid it. So if we're high, low, it's going to be low on the financial piece for me as well. But I agree just to have those, that those tools, in the toolbox to be able to come back to and to be able to recognize that you're, you're feeling a certain way right or you're low in a certain area, and you're not to take the time to actually notice, notice and evaluate. I'm, I'm, I'm curious about you. What, what regular practices do you have and how have they? How might they have changed in midlife, or have they Mm-hmm?
Speaker 3:Yes, I would say from a perception around like society, standards and expectations. They've changed a lot, so I'm less worried about what society deems as successful or beautiful or healthy or whatever that might be. And so, for example, I lift weights a lot and, of course, as I was younger, it would you know, I felt powerful, but it also you looked good, right. And so, course, as I was younger, it would you know, I felt powerful, but also you looked good, right. And so now I'm sort of really shifting that to feeling good. So I lift weights because I feel good and I'm strong and it helps my mobility as I get older.
Speaker 3:But another thing I have to do now, which I didn't, you know, even 10 years ago is I have to actively schedule days off between my intense workouts. I never had to schedule days off, I would just go, go, go, go, go. Well, what happens now is I get extremely sore, I mean uncomfortably sore, and I also find that my body just kind of says no, not today, right, and just not all this much energy. And so I thought, well, I'm not going to fight it, I'm going to, you know, lean into this, and so maybe I just go walking that day. So I think just recognizing what worked for you even a few years ago might not work for you now, but it's not a one size fits all and it's not really anybody's business what's your own on how that looks and how it makes you feel. So yeah, I've made some adjustments and I think mostly I'm giving myself a break, I'm not as hard on myself and I'm doing what feels right versus what looks right, and I'm okay with that.
Speaker 2:These days, we have to listen to yourself to be able to do that Right, and I think that, as we've raised kids and had jobs, like you, don't always slow down enough to listen. But when you did slow down, speaking of slowing down and changing gears a little bit, you came up with this idea of totally wise, your philosophy around how you wanted to to look forward and help others. What does totally wise mean to you and how does that tie into a wellbeing plan?
Speaker 3:My first week on the Camino, as I was walking 15 miles a day by myself, I had lots of time to think, and one of the things that's been on my mind nearly every day for the last 10 years is how do I use my life's experience to serve others? So I've been an entrepreneur, a mother, fitness enthusiast, a marketer, so all these things in my life. I really feel like they've been put in place so that I can harness them, create a system or a framework to help other people tap into their own energies and their own goals in life. Their own energies and their own goals in life. And so totally wise to me is this notion that we are all complete as we are right now. We do not need external validation, stimulation, anything else, but it's inside of us.
Speaker 3:What happens, I think, over time or under circumstances, is it gets buried right, and so we need to peel away these layers to get back to our natural state of sense of self. And so if you can become quiet, if you can build this sense of awareness which I think awareness is almost 90% of the work you can begin to listen to that intuition, leaning into ease versus effort, really finding those people that you're drawn to I talked about earlier, and so to me, totally Wise is that framework to help people unlock their inner wisdom and live in their full power and potential. And I'm building it as I go and I am, you know, hopefully one day going to be able to write a book and speak, you know, to people in larger audiences and just sort of really get that word out there. And I hope that this tool will serve people in helping them be able to really tap into what's already there.
Speaker 2:I love it. You know, april and I both do coaching and I find that people know Anyone I coach like the end will be like oh wow, I'm like you knew that already. You just need to listen. You needed either to listen to yourself or have someone help you listen to what's going on. So I love that idea that you know you already are, are wise, so maybe you don't have the muscles or the or the experience of how to unlock that, but that's a beautiful sentiment, like I got this right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you're trusting, you're just, you know you're receiving. Again, it comes back to receiving and open, palmed and moving with the river. I love your metaphor of the river and just flowing with it. You know the river goes where it's going to go, and sometimes it comes across rocks and sticks and it still gets there right. Sometimes it's not moving either, but it still gets there. What advice, sharmin, would you give women in this stage of life around taking care of themselves?
Speaker 3:I would say first of all, this is not a dress rehearsal, right? We are here in this one life to do what we need to do and make the most of it. Take care of yourself, prioritize yourself, advocate for yourself, whether that's at work, in your community, in your family, and never ask for permission to prioritize your own well-being. I find that, as women, we often are in service of others. We're taking care of family or children, whether it's our kids or now maybe it's going to become our parents, right, we're always in between these generations, and so I just think that we must take care of ourselves before we can take care of others, and you don't need to apologize for that. You don't need to ask anyone permission. I mean, when I told my husband I was going to Spain by myself for 30 days, he did not believe me for quite a while, until I was actually booking my flight.
Speaker 3:And I said so yeah really I was like so you know, I'm not again, I'm not asking, I'm telling you this is what I'm doing. I need this for myself. So I just think that we really need to step into our own power and our own wisdom. Do it now, get started. And I come back to also this lesson around meditation. I think meditation can be intimidating and I used to think, oh, I don't know how to do it, I'm not doing it right. And then someone once said to me you can't do it wrong.
Speaker 3:As long as you're thinking about it, as long as you're aware of it, and so, to me, that's how I go about my well-being strategy and I help others think about it. You can't do it wrong. It doesn't look like anyone else. It's not what you see on TV or on the internet. So take it slowly, take it one day at a time, prioritize yourself, and you'll eventually begin to feel that sense of being well.
Speaker 2:That's great. I love that. Okay, so is there anything else that you think our audience would want to know that we haven't asked you, and how can people find you?
Speaker 3:Um, anything else. Well, there's a few pieces of uh wisdom I've been leaning into lately and I'll just share those cause they're they're fun. One is not making a decision until you have to, and this can be really tough for type a personalities, people that want to check the list, they want to get it done, they want to be productive, they want to be efficient, they want to be seen as a superstar right, I think we make. I think we can all identify in that one way or another. I have no idea what you're talking about.
Speaker 1:I'm secretly giggling over here.
Speaker 3:My I would call it a superpower lately is I just will have my list and I'll just be like I'm not going to do that today, or that doesn't feel right, or I know that's there, but I'm not feeling compelled to check it off. You will be amazed how many things take care of themselves. I'm not kidding when I say that, like, oh, that worked itself out, okay, I didn't have to do anything, so that's been my fun go-to. Just let it be type of thing. And as far as where to find me, I have my own website at Charmangiocom. I'm on Instagram at the same at Charmangio and on LinkedIn Excellent.
Speaker 2:Well, great wisdom, and thank you for bringing your story and experience to others, because I know that people might not want to go on that trek but can take some time to sort of be quiet and hear what they have to say. So, um, we end our podcasts with a with a rapid fire questions just for fun. And so are you a morning person or a night owl?
Speaker 3:Morning person, but don't talk to me before 10 am.
Speaker 1:Okay, okay, fair Peace and quiet during those first two hours.
Speaker 3:Hiking or yoga. Oh, now you're asking me to pick between my two children.
Speaker 2:I put this one on purpose because, I know you love to do both, so if you had to, choose one.
Speaker 3:You know what? I'm going to trick you a little bit. I would pick hiking, because you can be in nature and because you can also practice yoga while you're hiking, cause it's quieting of the mind.
Speaker 2:You have some beautiful pictures on your social media accounts of where you're doing that crazy rock poses and things. Do you like to get things done early or last minute?
Speaker 3:I like to get things done early and I tackle what I don't want to do the most first.
Speaker 1:Oh good, Okay good. That is what I call eat the ugly green frog, which is another whole other podcast, but I have a frog actually sitting right here to remind you just that. Like, eat the frog, April you also raised your kids.
Speaker 2:that way too, I did.
Speaker 1:I did Like you've got to eat the frog, you just have to. What is the best piece of advice or a piece of advice that you've received or that you would give to our audience?
Speaker 3:I received this. I'm going to go back to business for a moment, because this served me well in business, but also in life, I think, with raising kids and being a good friend is to always anticipate the need of your customer, and you can replace customer with any type of stakeholder. Maybe that is right there, and so I think I've become really attuned to watching and looking and listening for signs and trying to anticipate what people might need or want, and I think, as a marketer and through other areas of my life, that served me really well, and even now I can say that now I'm not making those decisions until I have to. So I'm sort of combining all this advice that I've gotten throughout life, and I think another piece of advice would be to not sort of hold on to things too tightly but also be willing to change your mind and be flexible, and that's something that I've been working a lot on lately is not to be so rigid but to be more flexible and, you know, be a little more easy.
Speaker 2:Go with the flow. Right Sounds a little easier yeah. Well, thank you so much for your wisdom, and we could talk to you forever, but I think that you've brought some really good nuggets in, so I appreciate that, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Thank you. That's a wrap, Sharmin and audience. Until we meet again. Go find joy in the journey. Thank you for listening to the Medovia Menopause Podcast. If you enjoyed today's show, please give it a thumbs up. Subscribe for future episodes, leave a review and share this episode with a friend. There are more than 50 million women in the U? S who are navigating the menopause transition. The situation is compounded by the presence of stigma, shame and secrecy surrounding menopause, posing significant challenges and disruptions in women's personal and professional spheres. Medovia is out to change the narrative. Learn more at Medoviacom. That's M-I-D-O-V-I-A dot com.
