#510 How being a guest on podcasts can lead to surprising personal development and self-discovery, with Alex Sanfilippo.

What if the most powerful personal growth tool isn’t found in books or seminars, but in being a guest on a podcast?

If you're a purpose-driven professional aiming to grow your influence or deepen your self-awareness, podcast guesting may offer more than exposure, it can become a transformational tool. In this episode with PodMatch founder Alex Sanfilippo, we explore the often overlooked inner benefits of being interviewed: refining communication, developing confidence, and uncovering self-discovery through meaningful conversation.

• Discover how guesting on podcasts sharpens your communication and listening skills in real-time.
• Learn why vulnerability and imperfection are assets, not liabilities, when building trust with an audience.
• Hear how real-time reflection during interviews can lead to profound self-discovery and personal clarity.

Tune in now to uncover how simply being a guest on a podcast can unlock the next level of your personal and professional development.

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KEY POINTS AND TIMESTAMPS:

02:10 - Introduction to Alex Sanfilippo and the Power of Podcast Guesting

07:22 - Beyond Exposure: The Hidden Benefits of Being Interviewed

14:57 - Refining Your Message: Clarity Through Conversation

22:43 - Building Confidence: Speaking with Purpose and Presence

30:29 - Self-Discovery: Uncovering Insights Through Dialogue

37:15 - The Role of PodMatch in Connecting Purpose-Driven Professionals

42:08 - Practical Tips for Maximising Your Podcast Guest Experience

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MEMORABLE QUOTE:

"Be patient, slow down, be willing to let the journey take effect - build the proper muscle that you need to receive what you eventually want to get."

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VALUABLE RESOURCES:

🎙️Step into podcast guesting:

https://personaldevelopmentmasterypodcast.com/guest

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Personal development inspiration, self help insights, and actions to implement for self improvement and living with purpose.

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Transcript

Agi Keramidas: 0:00

What if the most powerful personal growth tool isn't found in books or seminars, but in being a guest on a podcast, welcome to Personal Development mastery, the podcast that helps intelligent, busy professionals develop self mastery and gain clarity so you can thrive in a fulfilling, purposeful life. I'm your host, Agi Keramidas, and this is episode 510 If you are looking to expand your impact and grow on a deeper level, this conversation with the founder of PodMatch, Alex Sanfilippo explores how going as a guest to podcasts can become a powerful tool for personal growth. By listening to this episode, you are going to discover how guesting on podcasts sharpens your communication and listening skills. You will also understand why vulnerability and imperfection are assets and not liabilities in building trust with an audience, and you will hear how real time reflection during podcast interviews can lead to profound self discovery and personal clarity. If you are seeking authentic personal growth through meaningful conversations, then this episode is for you. And one more thing — stay with me until the end of the episode. There is a unique and possibly unexpected invitation that might be just what you need for your next step forward! Now let's dive into the conversation!

Agi Keramidas: 2:09

Today's guest is someone who I'm really excited and honoured to have on the show, Alex Sanfilippo, Alex, you are a podcaster and the founder of podmats, which is a platform that automatically matches podcast guests and hosts for interviews. You are passionate about helping independent podcasters grow their influence and revenue so that they can better serve their listeners. Alex, welcome. I am delighted to have you with me here today.

Alex Sanfilippo: 2:47

Agi, thank you so so much for having me listen. The honours all mine. I'm just happy to be here. I love the way that you've shown up for the pod match community, and just the way you show up as a podcaster as well. At time recording more recently, you passed 500 episodes. But listen, I know you're just getting started, so again, thank you for what you do, and thank you for having me here. It's

Agi Keramidas: 3:06

truly an honour. It is. The feeling is mutual. So this is a great to start with today's conversation. Or what I would like to focus the conversation is on the benefits of going as guest on podcasts, however, not the, let's say obvious benefits that you gain visibility business opportunities or these things more the, let's say personal development elements of going as guests to podcasts. I will, I will leave that aside for the moment and what I want to say. And I will start this conversation with Alex. And you know, also for transparency, because we mentioned podmats, I have been personally using formats for two and a half years now. And you know, the only thing I will say it's been a game changer for personal development mastery, but also a game changer for my own growth. And I'm sure we will discuss about this later on. So what you may not know, Alex is also that you have been one of my greatest mentors throughout this journey. So I'm simply starting this conversation with a Hartford. Thank you, and I will leave it to that really, but I wanted to share it because it is true. And thank you very much,

Alex Sanfilippo: 4:43

man, that means so so much to hear. So I just, I will just say thank you. Seriously, so excited to be here today, and I love that we're talking about podcast guesting from a more non conventional approach when it comes to the results from it. So I just that's, that's a gift to get to be here to talk about this. So. Again, just honoured, happy to be here, and thank you for the kind words like making my day before we even get started.

Agi Keramidas: 5:08

Thank you. And I will start with something that you wrote, and you were talking about the hidden that's how you call it, the hidden value of podcast guesting. So let's talk about this hidden value that you call of podcast guesting, and there were two elements in that, one was communication, and the other was self discovery. So let's pick each of them and break it down and see how this happens. And we can start with either of the two. But let's start however. You want to start, Alex, I think I've spoken too much more than I usually do on my introduction.

Alex Sanfilippo: 5:48

You know, I immediately think I love that we're gonna talk about these two things. And again, this is truly a gift to be able to talk about because, yes, the obvious things, it grows your business gives you more influence. Like all those things, they are great. Everyone wants to talk about those. But the reality is that hidden value side, as you mentioned, I think, is the actual, real benefit of it. And I'll just quickly share a short story to kind of kick us off. And I was recently on a hike with my wife and another couple. And I say a hike. I live in Jacksonville, Florida. It's as flat as can be. We call it hiking when we just go on a trail. So we were quote, unquote hiking. So we're walking. And my friend's wife, I know him really well. I don't know her nearly as well. She's one of my wife, Alicia's friends, but she said, Alex, I've never met anyone who asks questions the way that you do. She's like the way you ask questions make me think in such a unique way. And like I and all three of them agreed. And at the time, I wasn't saying, I'm not saying this to sound pride or anything like that, but at that moment, I just said, Hey, listen. Like, I don't wanna really take credit for that. I've been asked these questions by podcast hosts that led me to learn to communicate my answer and also have some element of self discovery that actually changed my life. And so I was like, so I just am mimicking the questions I've heard great people ask me and so, and they were kind of like, okay, whatever. Alex, right, you know? But the reality is, that's the truth of it is people like, wow, Alex asked really great questions. He can also answer questions in really unique ways, and it's because of this medium. And so I shared that story just because I think that that's, that's that hidden value, like, it's what we learn in the process. Now, Agi, you and I both admitted to this beforehand, before hit record, but we didn't know this from day one, like we didn't get into this saying, I know the hidden value. It took me, like, 300 episodes to realise that. I don't know how long it took you, I'm guessing, not as long something like that. Okay, it just took a little bit. So for me, if you're hearing this, and you've never thought about guesting, and maybe you don't even know the more obvious benefits of it, but you're hearing this, this is something that's gonna be really special for you to discover now, because it is going to fast track your personal development, personal personal mastery, like all those things, get fast tracked when you step into this lane where you start communicating. So Agi, I'll turn back over to you. I don't mean to take over, like as a host, but communication, I think is a good place to start. I don't know if you have a question or you want to give an idea around that, but I think that'd be a good place for us to

Agi Keramidas: 8:09

jump into. It's a great place to start with communication. And I will, from my own personal experience, I will simply add that my communication is so much improved over these years that I have been doing the podcast and going as guest on other podcasts and interviewing people, and that, to a large extent, happened because I listen better. I think it starts, you know, it's you were saying about asking questions the way that you ask questions, and the impactful questions come from directly paying attention and listening carefully. You know, it is a this is a skill, for sure. I have learned to do that, so that is really my comment on what you said, it begins with listening carefully, and then the question comes, shall we say? You don't I don't know if that is your experience. I don't necessarily have to think about the questions. The question comes to me more that's the best way I can describe it,

Alex Sanfilippo: 9:22

yeah, for me on the communication side, especially as a guest, listening is absolutely key. And that sounds very obvious, right? Like when you and I say that to people, but the reality is, most people aren't listening. They've got their phone right next to them. Maybe they've got their notes in front of them, so they're reading their notes, thinking about what's the next thing I'm going to say, they're distracted by something else. And the best advice I ever got was from a friend. Scott O'Neill is his name, and he just had this saying where he said, Alex, just learn to be where your feet are. Learn to be where your feet are. My feet are planted in front of a microphone and a camera right now with my friend Agi. Be where I am being asked questions. The best thing I can do is be fully present right there in that moment, not five steps ahead, being like, okay, he's gonna ask me this, then this, then this, and then I gotta answer that right like, don't do that, just right here. Just listen really intently with no distraction around you. To me, that's where the answer comes from, and it's not like a sound bite, because there's some very trained media professionals. They'll come on and you ask them any question, they will twist it to their normal answer, and no offence to them. They're trained to do that. But there's not a lot of self discovery happening. It's already happened previously. So for me, I'm always working on that. I tend to be a little bit distractible, like it's easy for me to be distracting. That's why I don't keep my phone in the room, like my phone is nowhere around me, because if it goes off, I'm going to look at it, and then I might miss the real core of the question, or the heart behind it, like, where's the emotion from the host? And I think that just learn the best way you can communicate is really, truly listen. And I guess the best example I can give of this and Agi, you've had this experience, because I've had some coaches on here and stuff like that over the years, their job is mostly just to listen to actually hear what someone's saying so that they can respond or let that person just talk it out themselves. They're just pushing people along, learning to do that as someone who really enjoys hearing the sound of my own voice and talking, which is maybe a little weird, has been so helpful I talk less around my friends now, which is maybe a weird thing to say, but I've learned that, you know what, they've got great things to say. And I might actually learn if I just be quiet and listen a little bit, learning that level of communication has just I can't even express how much it's helped me. It has changed me as a person.

Agi Keramidas: 11:38

Me too. I don't what you mean that, unfortunately, it's very common that when two or more people having a conversation, usually when there is a small gap, someone jumps in to fill in that gap with whatever it is, which you know it's nice not to Be that person and just allow for the more natural pace of the conversation. Can I bring it back? Because we started talking about communication or improving communication, but from the point of being a guest or going as guest on VOCA so I would like to hear your thoughts on that particular element of improving communication.

Alex Sanfilippo: 12:25

Yeah, for one of my old podcasts, I used to interview guests, and I'll flip to me being the guest a moment here, but the most common thing I heard from people that were a guest I was interviewing about their book is I kept on saying, I really wish I would have been on this podcast before I finished the book, because you brought up a good point that I never thought about, and or they feel that they didn't articulate it well. So flip to being the guest like you said. It clarifies our message. And the thing is, if I'm talking and I can see you on screen right now, right if I'm saying something, and I'm trying to learn to communicate, well, trying to make it clear, but you keep on having to ask follow up questions. He's like, Okay, I think you're saying this. I'm guessing you mean this, right? If you're saying that, and I'm actually listening, like we said, that's kind of the core of this thing, right? The foundation is that listening ability. I can realise, you know what, I'm actually maybe not communicating this very well yet, like, there's obviously room for me to grow in this. And I guess a really funny example I can give is the first time I ever went to a conference after we had launched pod match. And I got in this room, there's probably a couple 100 people there. It was after COVID and stuff like that, and people like so what do you do the first person I explained pod match to Agi, it took me about 10 minutes to explain it. 10 minutes, you explained it in like five seconds, right? And that's great. And so for me, I was like 10 minutes. This thing's only two hours long. I can't talk to many more people. More people. The next person was nine minutes. The next person was eight minutes, the next person was seven, so on and so forth. Until the latter half of the event, it was taking me, like, 15 seconds to explain it, and people were getting it faster. If you have to say so many words to explain something, typically, it might be an indication that maybe you don't have the clarity yourself of it yet, because if it takes you that long to communicate it, it's really hard for someone to receive that. Even if they're listening really intently they want to, it's still a lot. But you can say, You know what? This is, what I'm articulating in as few words as possible. It only comes with reps, but people understand it a lot better. And for my own communication skills, I tend to over talk. And I don't mean to like I talk a lot, but I have learned to hone it in so so much and say less words, but say more of the right words in less time. And that right there from like, the ability to communicate really well. It that is, that is a game changer. Use that word earlier in our conversation like it is an absolute game changer to be able to do that, the way that people receive what you say, when you can do it that immense clarity. It changes things. It changes the way people listen to you, the way they respond to you and for yourself. Learning it that well, you have this level of confidence. I don't think you have without that.

Agi Keramidas: 14:56

Confidence is another big topic, and I would. Park it. Park it for now. And I'd come back, you know, to what you were just saying that initially took you way much longer to explain what you were doing. And then by practising, practising, it took you much, much less. And you reminded me of that phrase that says, If you don't, if you can't explain it simply. You don't understand it well enough. And that applies to even complex topics, which, you know, the nature of our business. It's not a complex topic. It should be very easy to, you know, articulate, shall we say? So that was the comment in the communication. And one other thing that came to my mind about being part in a conversation and communicating and listening was the difference between listening to understand and listening to reply. Many people, if not most people, listen to reply and that, I think that's where it twists. We don't have to have the reply radius we do. And I know I'm going back to the other direction again, but

Alex Sanfilippo: 16:13

yeah, I like that. You brought that up in my personal life, I have people that I'm more acquaintances I know, and they they listen to reply, and it is, for most of us, very obvious. When you're around that type of person, you kind of feel like that. You're just a shell. They're looking straight through you, right? And they're just like, I just want to say my next thing. They're not usually the most relational people, or they're not the most successful relationships when it comes to even friendships in their lives, right? The person that listens with the intent of hearing and understanding, though, that's the person that I always see that's surrounded by so many people, because everyone else knows that that person actually cares from the very least, learning to do that through podcasting. That's a beautiful thing that you will take into your romantic and friendship relationships in a really big and meaningful way. I'm glad you brought that up. Agi. That was a good point.

Agi Keramidas: 17:04

Let's say someone is listening right now, and they are considering guessing, but they are perhaps held back because exactly their message is not clear enough, or they consider it not to be clear enough. What would you say to someone like that,

Alex Sanfilippo: 17:23

I actually think that that's okay. It's part of the process. It's self discovery. When you can come on a podcast, if you feel like it's not quite ready, maybe spend some time reflecting, take some notes. But if you wait till you're ready, you're probably never gonna do it. It took me nine months to launch my podcast, not because I didn't know how to do it, but because I I kept on wanting to be perfect or better, right? I think that so many of us get stuck in that. And the reality is, if I go back to my previous podcast before, the one I have now, my podcast now is about podcasting, because it's really all I do. But my previous one was about entrepreneurship. I brought a guy on. It was his first time ever on a podcast. He'd never done anything media related. Media related ever, and it was one of my most popular episodes ever. And when people emailed in or message in, they kept on saying this one just felt really real. It felt really raw. I could tell that person had never been asked any of these questions before. Didn't really know how to answer them well, but knew his craft really well. Knew who he was really well. And so again, I think that if you feel that you're not ready, go back to the drawing board for yourself, right? Who am I? What do I believe? What do I really know that could serve somebody else and then just show up, put yourself out there. The reason people really liked that episode so much is because it felt like just another human being talking, which often is better than someone who has been there, done it all, and is perfect, because that's so far from all of us, right? Like, how far are we from that? And so, you know, I actually think of your podcast cover art, Agi, which I really love. It's somebody pushing a rot like a boulder up a hill, right? If there's someone at the top of the hill yelling at you. Here's how you get to the top. I already got mine up here. That can be a little bit helpful. But what's more helpful is someone coming right beside you and helping you push it, saying, Hey, I've never been to the top, but I can tell you that both of us to meet together be easier. I find that the podcast guests that show up really raw and maybe don't have it all dialled in yet, or the ones that are helping push that rock right next to somebody else.

Agi Keramidas: 19:20

Thank you for this answer. I think that is for the person who needed to hear this. It's very good. Straight to the point. Let's bring it towards the self discovery element, because that is, indeed, I believe, apart from the communication, of course, is a big part of it. But when you are knowing yourself better, that is, I believe, a benefit that for many comes unexpected. I know, and you were saying it took you a while to realise it. It didn't come in the beginning. I realised that some. Point that, Oh, my God, this person I've never been asked this before, I have to articulate my thoughts, and that was my experience of self discovery in the sense that I have to articulate some thoughts which I never had before, apart from my head. And you know, the sound of language inside the mind is very different than the actual sound. It is quite distorted up there. So when you speak it out, it is, in a way, revealing, I think, revealing about what it is inside that you have and you bring it out, I have sometimes surprised myself. Oh, okay, I never said anything like that before. So this is my, let's say, introduction to the self discovery element of being a guest at podcasts. You know,

Alex Sanfilippo: 21:00

you shared a little about this. I'm not gonna call it a specific time, but I'm gonna call out two specific episodes of your Show, Episode 500 and episode 501 and I encourage everybody, if you've not heard those yet, finish this one, but then look up episode 500 and 501 I think you'll really get a lot out of that. You'll hear more of of what Agi has learned and what's been taken from this show. But what you really said there was key, the one word that stood out to me. Stood out to me is revealing. Revealing is to me the perfect description of of what we're talking about here. I have said some things as a guest on a podcast that when I said it, I was like, I should write that down. And it's not because I was I was lying or making things up on the spot. It's just I had never articulated that way, and it actually clicked for me, oh, that is what I'm doing. But I never figured out how to say it, really, until this moment when somebody asked me in a really unique way. And I know we already talked about listening being the foundationist thing, but it matters so much, because when someone asks you a question that no one else has ever asked you, even if it's kind of the same question, just in its own unique way that might be, what finally reveals to you how to answer it correctly. And so for me, figuring out how to answer these things correctly is has been like that, that deep moment where you're like, Okay, I actually I need to write this down. Like I need to now think about this. And for me, like I don't, I don't. Right after this, this interview is over when we're done recording. I don't have anything booked after this, because what I've learned to do is leave some space for me to then go self reflect on it, to write it down like there's gonna be something from this conversation that I learn and grow from. If I just put things back to back to back to back, I lose that opportunity. It gets diluted throughout the day, right? So if I'm like, Okay, thanks for having me on. I gotta go. And I jumped straight in my next meeting. I'm now going now going to probably forget some of those moments, and while they're fresh, it's great to leave that space. Plus, if we have a great conversation, want to talk longer we can, right? So you want to leave that space I'm not thinking about we got to hurry this up, but also leaving that room to say, okay, Alex, you shared a few things in there you've never, never mentioned before. Why did that come up? What kind of made this spark happen inside of you? And for me, I want to make sure that I really honour those moments, and I'm a firm believer in having pen and paper handy, even in business and life. Have it handy, because when you write it down, it does something it I don't. I'm not like a neuroscientist or anything like that, but I know it starts to reprogram the waves in your mind a little bit when you start writing things down. So things down. So I think that as things are revealed to you, as you're communicating, write them down, leave that space. You'll come up to your next interview or your next conversation, more aware that self discovery really begins in that moment.

Agi Keramidas: 23:37

Now I realise that from your from what you just said, now that this is very important task, shall we say? That is or opportunity. Forget about the task, because it sounds like it is something that you have to do an opportunity to assess or to reflect on the conversation or what happened, and reflecting on a call or an experience after it has happened, or reflecting at the end of your day about today, it is really an essential habit. What was the phrase that the life worth living is a life worth documenting. So I think that is also in a way you're documenting when you write down. It doesn't have to be something magnificent, but something that you learned or could do better, or reflection. Reflection brings lot of self awareness when you reflect.

Alex Sanfilippo: 24:41

I really like that quote. I never heard that one before that. That's good. I'm gonna, I'm gonna, that's one that I'll go right down to that point. You know, I actually, if it's okay. I had a question just given what you do, had a question for you on this topic, if, if that's all right. I

Agi Keramidas: 24:54

was afraid that this,

Alex Sanfilippo: 24:58

well, I just, I think that so many. Of us, we're we're not really confident in what we want to share yet, and not that we're scared to talk or anything like that, but like what we what we feel convicted about talking about, or our own personal life, like we're not ready to open that up yet. And opening up and learning to do that is really big on our own personal development, development mastery, right? Is like that. That journey requires we open up, that we overcome that fear. You've had all kinds of get kinds of guests on here, and you've been a guest on, I don't even know how many shows yourself. What are your thoughts to somebody who's like, okay, I can share it. I think I'm ready, but I am terrified to open up that box. What are people going to think? What are they going to say? What if I cry? Right? Like, what do you say to someone who's in that space? Because, again, you've seen it on both sides of the microphone, I'm sure. Thank

Agi Keramidas: 25:45

you for bringing this up. And you didn't say the word, but the word that came to my mind when you were describing that was vulnerability and being that. It certainly is. I mean being vulnerable and sharing openly about yourself, of course, to the extent that is comfortable, appropriate, you know, all those things, but it is a necessary element in personal growth. By expressing that because, you know, our main I believe reason for not wanting or being or hesitating to do that is the fear of judgement from others. What if they don't like it? What if I don't say the right thing? What if I whatever, whatever else fear might come up. And I think by actually getting over that and starting to be vulnerable and share to some extent, to the extent that you want to share, but some things that some people might take it in a way that you know could be the not the way that you want them to so what it is a very good, good lesson and path and and journey to becoming more confident, becoming better because at the very end, what's important is you are sharing something about yourself. Could be an event, could be a belief, an aspiration, a fear. Usually it is, I think, the fears and the aspirations that we're very reluctant to serve for different reasons. So yeah, for a moment there, Alex, I felt like I was a guest on my own vulnerability. That is

Alex Sanfilippo: 27:50

the word. That's exactly it, you know, and it made me think of a time when I was on a podcast and I cried on the podcast, and I'm not usually one to do that, like I happen to be a follower of Jesus, and like I shared my story of hitting rock bottom and finding Jesus for the first time, and I just started crying on the podcast, and I couldn't I couldn't help it. It was a very vulnerable moment for me, because I'm not much of a crier. Anyway, I don't really hold back tears, but I don't feel the need to cry much, if that makes sense, but I realised that what I was doing was being just completely raw from a transparency level, and I just was willing to put myself on the line. And that level of comfort just kind of gave me the the space to be able to to actually have that moment where, like, this raw emotion just came up. And I know I'm using the word raw a lot, but that's, that's what it came down to. So for me, it was like I was willing to be transparent. I was and I had a willingness to put myself on the line, like I was sharing what I believed, even though many people don't share that belief. I was like, You know what? This is me, and it it helped me grow in my confidence. That vulnerability helped me grow in my confidence as a communicator, as as a man, as a person, right? Like, it just helped me really cross this line that I feel that I never crossed before. And it was on a random podcast where we were probably talking about podcasting for the most part, right? But this topic came up and and to this day I can set to be a gift like that was really an opportunity for me to again share that vulnerability which caused me to grow in my confidence.

Agi Keramidas: 29:22

Thank you for sharing that. And I think that the we might think, or one might think, that if you start crying without expecting it, or on a on podcast recording, that might be a bad thing. However, I think that is very much relatable. So how many of us, if we see someone you know well enough when they speak about something, I think I would personally pay more attention to this, because there is emotion there involved. So that is much more compelling than someone you know speaking when. Without that element. So it is. You know, there is so much conditioning that's not right to cry, or what would people say, or this or that. But as you said, on the other side of it, there was confidence. And what is more important benefit out of all that, and it's very it's important the confidence and the relatability that you have with people when you are being vulnerable, because people also have cried, people also they can relate with that rather than, you know, a polished version in immaculate speech, or whatever else might be so and personally, I'm on my own. You know, don't think that I am comfortable to speak about anything yet, but. But you know, the more I do it, and the more I'm asked questions that I was unprepared for. With this, it is happening.

Alex Sanfilippo: 31:05

It's all a journey, right? Like it really is, and I think that that's to me, the beauty of being a guest on a podcast is it's a journey like you're growing and learning, like we're not waiting for a destination that we've arrived at before we get on a podcast. Some of my most impactful podcasts when I didn't know the answers to things because I hadn't done it yet for me, like I talk about my business sometimes on shows, and I don't know what I don't know yet. And we're not like the biggest company in the world, and I'm figuring things out every day, but like being in it, being in the trenches and being willing to share that vulnerability, once again, that does two things. One, it shows someone a case person's human. He's on a journey, just like me. Journey just like me. He might be a step or two further. That can help me, right? You can help me roll this, this, this giant boulder up the hill, because he's right there with me. But two, it also sometimes I find the answer, right? The thing I've been struggling with in my own head, when someone asks me a question, we already top of this, but like I start finding that and that, once again, that is self discovery at the finest. It's you're kind of like a coach right now, and I'm kind of the person that you're coaching in this moment. You're asking me questions that no one else has ever asked me today, Agi, so I am answering them the best I know how to. That's like you being a coach and me being the person who is getting coaching, the person who's getting therapy, right like I'm in that seat right now. It's a gift to be here, and I think that's what I want to encourage people to think about. The hidden value of podcast guesting is, yes, you learn to communicate really well. That's super helpful. But the self discovery piece, it's worth its weight in gold, even if no one ever listens this episode, which I know is not the case for your podcast, Agi, but let's just say it never goes anywhere. It's just you and me here. This was worth its weight in gold.

Agi Keramidas: 32:40

I agree. I agree very much. Can you talk about, since we're talking about this particular a moment, that you, Alex, as a guest, being a guest, you were asked something that taught you something very surprising about yourself.

Alex Sanfilippo: 32:59

Yeah, the when I first got started, I definitely dealt with some dealt with some imposter syndrome, because I thought I needed to have all the answers. And I went on a podcast I really had no business being on. It wasn't the right fit for me to be on, but the person was asking very, very deep questions, kept on asking them. And I did my this sounds bad. I did my best to make up answers I can come up with, and I was very new at this. I regret answering things not fully truthfully, right? But the question started getting so intimidating and so tough. It was also a live show, by the way, so it was streamed live to the audience, so it was a different level of this is my first time doing that, and he asked me a question. I don't recall the question exactly which, it's not really important. What was important was my answer in that moment, which was this a long pause, I don't actually know the answer to that. He's like, you want to take a stab at it. And I was like, I don't know. I have no idea what to say. And that was my answer. And we end up wrapping up the conversation a little bit later, and I kind of felt bad, like I was like, Man, I couldn't answer that question. Like, man, Alex, come on. Like, you gotta be better on your feet than that, right? But after the conversation, we cancel, shut down the live side of it, and it was just me and him in the room, and he goes, Man, I have to tell you, I respect you so much. I was like, okay, like I didn't know to say. He goes, when you said, I don't know the answer and I have no idea what to say. He's like, no one has ever answered a question on this podcast that way. And he goes, I know people are not telling the truth when they're answering some of these questions. He goes, and that's okay. He goes, but the fact that you just owned it said so much about you. And so for me, to this day, I still look back. I shouldn't have been on that podcast in the first place. I had no business being there, but I did learn that, you know what, it's okay. When I don't have the answer. And instead of trying to BS my way through it, I'm just going to openly say I don't know. I'm not sure. I don't know how to answer that. And that is perfectly fine to be able to do, if anything, it shows a level of confidence in what you do know when you say I don't know about that, so I can't comment on it. So that for me, has been very much so freeing. It kind of freed me from that idea of imposter syndrome, thinking I had to have all the answers to be worthy of being on a platform.

Agi Keramidas: 35:10

It's very useful. I agree with you that sometimes we say, well, I don't know or and it's very useful for imposter us, for I'm bringing it back to something for someone that might be fearful about being vulnerable. Actually, I will leave that because it is irrelevant. So one thing, and I will mention that, which is digress, sometimes I have them, and it comes with experience with a conversation, I have a sense of whether it's going in a way that it shouldn't go, and I have the tendency to bring myself back while speaking it. So I hope it doesn't sound very weird, but it just happened now I was about to go somewhere, and no, see, that's part

Alex Sanfilippo: 36:01

of being a good communicator. That's what you've learned through podcasting. You gotta pivot in real time. And by the way, I gotta say, like being a guest is great, being a host is really great, as well being a host, though I find to be really tough, because you have to listen to my answer. But also think about the people that are going to be listening at the same time, making sure it's gonna be valuable for them. And you have to course correct. I cannot tell much respect to have for you doing over 500 episodes. I know you're still just getting started, but, man, it's so much more work. So a round of applause for Agi everybody. It's a lot. But anyway, I respect seeing you process in real time and pivoting. That's a great communication

Agi Keramidas: 36:36

skill. It's also, you know, vulnerability in this sense, because it is, in a way, it is a mistake. You one could say, or, you know, it is not polished, or I could have avoided it altogether, but it is, it happened as part of one to one conversation between humans. So I think it is relatable, as I was saying earlier. We are all. We all make mistakes, simple ones, or, you know, we forget what we're about to say next, or whatever this happens. I will ask you, Alex, as we're going to start wrapping things up little by little, let's direct again, the next, at least the next comment to someone listening to this conversation, a busy professional, all right, that has been intrigued by this conversation and realising that there is more to go In as guest podcasts than what had thought before. What's one? Let's say simple, actionable step one could take listening to this to progress with it, the journey. We use this word journey in the like. So the first thing

Alex Sanfilippo: 37:56

I'll share, we've kind of already talked about this point a little bit, so I'll give two things, if that's okay. But of course, pen and paper matters. Sit down. Think about what it is that you want to talk about. And yes, it can be your business, but you want to, you want to have your journey inside of it, because just talking about business, that's what advertising is for, right? Like there needs to be a personal touch. It needs to contain you. Pen and paper. Writing that down is the best way to kind of discover how those things have parallels, and where you can kind of bring it all together. You don't need to map out exactly what you're going to say, but know the approach. Because I will say this, there are a lot of podcasts out there, and they're not all going to be the right fit. And if you don't do that first, you might start jumping on every show that will have you, and there will be a lot of them that will have you, but you might realise that, like, Man, I'm not really growing or developing in any proper direction. Because we're talking about golf, we're talking about parenting, we're talking about business, we're talking about skiing, right? Like, it could be all kinds of things, and it's just like, Okay, what am I doing here? We never want to be the person that's running aimlessly. We want to make sure that we're on target, we're heading in the right direction. Yes, you pivot, you course correct on the way. But that's the very first thing I think that matters. Once you've done that, it's all about doing the outreach. You can't just be like, I'm ready to be a guest on a podcast and sit around you need to start doing the outreach. Then, by the out, the best way I've found people do outreach is just make it human to human. Listen, I love AIS and stuff like that, and they have their uses. But like, if you're gonna reach out to be a guest on a podcast, mentioned like, Hey, I love what you're doing. It aligns with what who I think I'm able to serve as well. I'd love to share this message, because I think it would help benefit some people. I'm nervous myself, right? You can even say that, but I think this isn't really helpful. So I'm stepping up to do it if you share in a really, really human way, and not being like, here's all the achievements I've done, here's all this. It makes such a difference, because what I find is the good podcast host, they're looking for a human to have a conversation with, and if you open up with a robot or something that feels robotic, versus just you being raw, like we've talked about, you are going to diminish your chances. But I always tell people, you have to be willing to do some outreach if you want to be a guest. So first. Figure out the right lane of shows and then start doing the outreach.

Agi Keramidas: 40:05

That's good. Thank you for the double, of

Alex Sanfilippo: 40:09

course. Thank you for allowing me to share too. Sure,

Agi Keramidas: 40:12

why not? You can add a third one. If I'm good, if you have

Alex Sanfilippo: 40:15

a third one, go for it. If not, we're okay.

Agi Keramidas: 40:18

No, no, I'm good also, since we had this conversation, Alex about particularly them, the benefit of, you know, being asked these kinds of questions that at least the insightful hosts on the host that do the podcast in a certain way, this is very, very useful and very we used the word revealing earlier, and it can bring about a lot of awareness or self discovery, As we were saying. So I think with that, I'm connecting it to also pod match as a way, ideal way I will add, from my point of view, to get out there and become instantly visible to I don't know how many, I don't remember how many 1000s of podcasts there are there, but

Alex Sanfilippo: 41:23

I don't know either, so let's go 1000s. Thank you,

Agi Keramidas: 41:29

Alex. As we start wrapping this up to questions, which I always ask, and the first one is, what does personal development mean to you?

Alex Sanfilippo: 41:42

Yeah, personal development, to me, is extremely inwardly focused. It's, it's what happens when you're alone with no distraction, no screen. Perhaps you are doing something that you love, like, for me, it's going on a walk, and specifically a way, I live in a city, so it's away from the city, like that's that's what personal development means to me, is when I'm there and I'm listening to myself. And I was scared of that for years, by the way, like getting alone, listening, being silent, where personal development happens. I was terrified that because I didn't want to know who I actually was. I liked wearing a mask of who I thought other people wanted me to be. That's not personal development. That's building up a wall between you and who you actually are. For me, personal development is that time alone and where you just listening to your thoughts and you're letting it position who you become in the future.

Agi Keramidas: 42:31

Thank you. And hypothetically, if you could go back in time and meet your 18 year old self, what's one piece of advice you would give him

Alex Sanfilippo: 42:42

after punching him in the face, because that would be step one. I know everyone wants to say that, right? Like that would be it. I would say. I'd use a quote from Proverbs actually out of the Bible, and it says, an inheritance gain and haste won't be blessed in the end. And I think 18 year old Alex needed to hear that, to be patient, to slow down, to be willing to let the journey take effect, to build the proper muscle that you need to receive what you eventually want to get. I needed that as an 18 year old because I was very, very ambitious, but not willing to wait. You are patient now, then I'm working on

Agi Keramidas: 43:17

it. I'm asking because I'm past my 50 now, and I'm still working on my patience. It seems like it is the theme of my life. Patience,

Alex Sanfilippo: 43:27

yep, patience. It's a virtue. It's something I think it's a lifelong journey to learn, right? And that's the beauty of our personal and self development, right? Is that is that it can be a journey. So

Agi Keramidas: 43:39

thank you, Alex. I will, before I close, I will refer, and actually you can also add your thoughts on it, because we have been talking about going as guests, and I will certainly bridge it to podmats, because it is how we connected, and all the other things that we mentioned earlier. So I will invite someone listening now to if they are interested, to cultivate the self awareness via going as guests, to go to personal development mastery podcast.com/guest and there you will also see my the profile of my podcast, and actually was in Alex. And please also say it after me that I was thinking of having some conversations, some interviews with listeners of the podcast. And I think that would be a very interesting prospect, so I blended a lot of there in one short thing. So that is for me, you know, pretty much my start of the conclusion for today.

Alex Sanfilippo: 44:59

Alex. I think that I like that a lot. I've never heard of another host doing this before, but, like, we just talked about the hidden value of being a podcast guest, and then you said, and here's a way you can actually do it, like personal development mastery podcast.com/guest, listen if you're hearing this and you're like, I might have something to share. Do it the very least. Agi. And you might decide maybe not, but it's probably gonna be, yeah, let's do it. And I love when I hear a podcast having their listeners on. It doesn't need to be every episode, but doing that, I think, builds such a great connection. They listen people that they're hearing this. They're here because they like you, right? Agi, hopefully they like you. That's why they're here. Hopefully they're here because you've developed some sort of trust with them. Yes, for you, the listener, this is going to be a safe space for you. If you're like, I want to get started with this. This might be a really great ground for you to get started. So I love that you shared that as our, as our, like, call to action at the end of this thing. I think it's absolutely brilliant, and it's gonna, it's gonna fast track somebody's personal development mastery journey. And I'm excited about that,

Agi Keramidas: 45:56

Alex, I want to thank you very much for this conversation today, I want to wish you from my heart the very best with continuing your mission of helping podcasters like myself and 1000s of others, I will leave it to you for parting words and any final message to the listeners, yeah,

Alex Sanfilippo: 46:21

and Agi, thank you again for having me. the last thing I say, Seriously, this was just this was a blast. It was so great to be here, and I really respect you as a host. The last thing I'll say to listeners, I'll leave you with this, is that each of us has greatness and creativity within ourselves. You have greatness and creativity within yourself. I believe we're all created beings. And as created beings, we are created to go and create ourselves and to continue moving that forward. And I think that when we position ourselves from a personal development standpoint, and we step into our full selves, we create so much better, and that's ultimately what changes the world makes a better place. And so I encourage you, get out there, step into your greatness, and get out there and start creating things that really serve the world.

Agi Keramidas: 47:03

Thank you for listening to this conversation with Alex and Filippo. I hope it has given you a fresh perspective on what it means to be a podcast guest, as well as offering exposure and visibility, stepping behind the mic provides a rich opportunity for growth, for clarity and for self discovery. If you've ever considered sharing your message, or if you simply want to explore what you might learn about yourself in the process, I invite you to take that next step, you will find a link in the show notes to join me as a guest on the podcast, and I would love to hear your story until next time, keep growing and keep showing up as your authentic self.