What Men Really Want in Relationships Mindful Monday Cinco De Mayo

We explore what men truly want in relationships by sharing feedback directly from male listeners and research findings about men's relationship priorities. This Mindful Monday episode flips the script to examine relationships from the male perspective, revealing surprising similarities in what both genders seek from their partners.

• Men consistently want respect, to feel valued and appreciated by their partners
• Security and trust form essential foundations, with men wanting to know their partner is committed
• Emotional connection matters to many men who seek partners who engage in deep conversations
• Physical intimacy helps men feel connected, desired and wanted
• Appreciation for efforts and qualities significantly impacts how valued men feel
• Open, honest communication is essential for building understanding and addressing issues
• Men need space and independence while also wanting to share their lives with partners
• The 2-2-2 rule suggests: date night every two weeks, weekend getaway every two months, vacation every two years
• Trust, loyalty, honesty and a good sense of humor round out men's relationship priorities
• While men and women may express needs differently, their core relationship desires are strikingly similar

Text in your questions, comments or relationship concerns!                            Find *ElkevateYourLife on YouTube, *Amazon Music, *Apple Podcasts and *Spotify.

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome to Mindful Monday
• 1:41 What Men Want in Relationships
• 4:54 Key Aspects: Respect, Security, Connection
• 13:10 Communication and Independence
• 16:30 The 2-2-2 Rule for Relationships
• 21:21 Astrology in Relationships
• 27:40 Thank You to Sponsors and Subscribers
• 32:48 Closing and Contact Information

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Bow, chicka, wow, wow, what's up? Party people, welcome to another episode of Elkivate your Life. I am your hostess, with the mostess L as in the letter L and key as in the key to your heart. Well, welcome to Mindful Monday, where we are doing a segment on relationships. Relationship seems to be a hot topic for the past few weeks, so I thought I would approach things from the man's perspective this time. What is it the man is looking for? And I did my research, ladies and gentlemen. I actually asked the men out there what is it you're looking for in a woman, a date, a relationship of? What does that look like to you? What's important to you? And so here is the feedback that I received. Thank you all for tuning in. Thank you to Persimmon Dental, our sponsor, persimmon Dental, located in Dublin. Thank you to all of my subscribers Jeff Parra, kara Kitchell, mike Kaufman, kyle Few. I appreciate all of you and I will come back to that. So, first things first, what is important to the men? What are the men looking for? Well, from one particular gentleman to be adored, to be respected, also a low-maintenance relationship. It's that simple for most of us. I think this is what most men want, but not all. These are the answers I hear on dating shows, mixed with what I want. We don't want a quarrelsome woman, we just want an easygoing one that doesn't argue or yell. But I don't know if that exists anymore. How sad you don't know if that exists anymore. Well, that's from one of my loyal listeners and then another one basically shared with me. Well, in relationships, men generally seek respect, security, a sense of emotional connection and healthy physical intimacy. They also value appreciation, communication and the ability to maintain individual interests and hobbies, while also feeling a sense of shared life with their partner. So, to go in a little bit deeper, you know what I always forget if I did this part, and I apologize, guys, but my mind has just been in a million different directions L as in the letter L and key as in the key to your heart. I think I did say it, but you know whatever I repeated it. Ok, sorry, squirrel.

Speaker 1: 3:39

Key aspects men desire in a relationship and I do hope that I hear feedback from the men that are listening and women feel free to chime in on. Well, I do that and this is what happens. I would love to hear you have the ability to text in your comments your questions, so I would love to hear what you have to say. So key aspects respect Men want to be treated with respect, both in how they're spoken to and how their partner sees them.

Speaker 1: 4:15

They want to feel valued and appreciated. I definitely get that and I definitely feel like that's a mutual thing. I think the women want the same thing. We want to be respected right and we want to be spoken to in a respectful way and feel valued and appreciated. I think that women would agree with that.

Speaker 1: 4:44

Security Feeling secure in a relationship means that knowing their partner is committed and faithful, creating a sense of trust and stability. I have to tell you, as I'm going down the list of the things that the men are telling me that are important I mean, I feel like it's just as important to the women. We want to feel secure in a relationship. We want to know that you are committed, you're faithful, that you are creating a sense of trust and stability. Guys, we don't want to be going somewhere and in the car. I remember this as a complaint in my younger years of you're in the car with your boyfriend and you're on your way to dinner or the movies or wherever it is you're going, you're on your way to your destination and the car next to you happens to be a beautiful woman or beautiful women, and your guy looks over and is like, does the whole Joey from Friends thing of how you doing? And I just remember seeing that through other relationships, not necessarily my own, I mean I'm sure it happened to me at some point, maybe in my high school years or in my younger days. But, guys, come on, you have to be more discreet. I think it's okay to look, it's human nature to look, but do we need to go the extra mile of smiling, waving, winking, flirting? No, there has to be boundaries. Same goes for the ladies, anyway. So, security, emotional connection Men want a partner who engages in deep conversations, shares their dreams, their fears and creates a sense of an emotional closeness.

Speaker 1: 6:54

Hmm, I think it depends on the man. I can think of some people that could care less about deep conversations and sharing their dreams and fears and creating a sense of emotional closeness, but maybe it depends on the man, right? Maybe it depends on the type of relationship that they are looking for. Anyway, sorry about that, guys. I was trying to find my thought. Go back to my thought, and some of it is from my notes and from people that I interviewed, but also research that I did. So bear with me I'm kind of fumbling and it's been an exhausting day for those of you teachers and all that out there. We're going through testing right now and it's been a challenge, and today was day one, so a little bit tired, especially because I didn't sleep well last night due to my mind and thoughts, and yeah, that's just kind of how my brain works on Sunday night.

Speaker 1: 8:41

Okay, going back to emotional connection. Okay, so the other one physical intimacy. Physical touch and intimacy are important for men, helping them feel connected, desired and wanted. I have to say physical touch is one of my love languages and I'm all about this physical touch intimacy. I know that men are very visual and sex is important to most, so I definitely can appreciate physical intimacy, great physical intimacy, and what I hear from a lot of the men is like oh, you women get lazy, or you stop taking care of yourself, or maybe you don't get dressed up and dolled up the way you used to. Guys, it works both ways. You still got to make the effort to look nice, smell nice, take care of your hygiene. Yes, the same does the women have to keep our bodies in shape and do our makeup and hair and you guys don't have to get manicures or pedicures or shave or wax or. A lot of us want that. I mean. Maybe there's a small percentage that don't care about those things, but a lot of women, we, we want that in our man as well.

Speaker 1: 10:33

Just saying appreciation men appreciate being acknowledged and praised for their efforts, kindness and qualities. I definitely get that. I do think that that is important. I do make it a point in my own personal relationships to appreciate, say I appreciate you working hard for us. Oh, I appreciate you going by the store to pick this up. I appreciate you remembering that I love tulips when they bloom in the springtime. So I definitely can understand how men would want the women to express their appreciation, you know, for being thoughtful and being mindful.

Speaker 1: 11:33

Communication Wow, this is a big one, not just for men but for women. Communication, open and honest communication, is essential for building a strong relationship and addressing any issues that arise. Well, we all know, if you can't communicate with your partner, how are you able to establish an understanding of each other's wants and needs each other's wants and needs If you don't have open and honest communication. I mean it literally says is essential. So true, and there's so many people out there that are not great at communication, might need to brush up on their skills of communication, might need to brush up on their skills of communication, learn how to be open and honest with their communication. I mean, if you don't have these things that we're bringing up, I think these are the foundation. This is a foundation to your relationship, right? You have to start with the foundation and I do think that a lot of these are the building blocks for that Space and independence.

Speaker 1: 12:54

Men often need their space to recharge, pursue their interests and maintain a sense of individuality, a sense of individuality. Perfect example man cave. What man doesn't want to have the man cave where he can go and watch his sports, he can have his buddies over, drink some beers, maybe shoot pool. Maybe they're talking about their wives and their girlfriends and the things they do or don't like about them. Maybe your man cave is in your garage where you're tinkering with your car or your tools. I definitely get this and understand how they need their space to recharge and pursue their interests and maintain a sense of individuality. And maintain a sense of individuality, shared life. While maintaining their own interests, men also want to share their lives with their partner, including their goals, dreams and daily experiences.

Speaker 1: 13:59

So many times when I talk to people that have been in long-time relationships or married for a long time, they talk about oh, the first thing that we do when we get home is how was your day, honey? And maybe you sit down and have a glass of wine or you're talking about it over dinner, but to sit down and say how was your day? What were? Even? I used to do this with my kids and I think it is really important to do this in a relationship Like what were your highs and lows about today? And what was your rose, what was your thorn? Um, and what are your goals? Are you, you know, in a high profile position? Are you a laborer?

Speaker 1: 14:58

Definitely want to ask about each other's days and elaborate on that. Like how was your day, honey? Oh, it was good. What was good about it? Oh well, I made this amazing sale and I made connections. So from that sale I gained three leads and I'm going to follow up with them. How was your day? Oh, my day was good. You know, we had testing and well, one student was kind of inappropriate by coloring and writing some things on the picture. Then I had an aha moment where I helped the student find the answers on the science test, so it was a very gratifying day. Okay, awesome. Oh, you want to enjoy some dinner now and talk about what we're going to do this week? Oh, sure.

Speaker 1: 15:53

So I definitely think that these things, even though it says that and the men say these are what the men need, Women want these same things, and so we're not so different. By the way, does anyone know what is the 222 rule in relationships? Well, the 222 rule in relationships, if you don't know, it's a guideline suggesting couples dedicate specific times to each other A date night every two weeks, a weekend getaway every two months and a week-long vacation every two years. This approach aims to maintain closeness and prevent relationships from becoming stale due to the demands of daily life. God, this is so true. I cannot remember the last time that I did any of these things a date night, a weekend getaway, a week-long vacation. Yeah, clearly we're not practicing this. And when I say say we, I mean me. Well, my husband and I, we haven't had a date night, we haven't had a weekend getaway. We had like a day and an overnight, recently, recently, and we haven't had a week-long vacation since, oh my gosh. Yeah, since Hawaii, where we got engaged several years ago. Hmm, interesting, interesting.

Speaker 1: 18:02

So the elaboration is date night every two weeks. The regular date allows the couples to reconnect and focus on each other and fostering a sense of intimacy and companionship, definitely failing on that. One weekend getaway every two months, spending a weekend away together, provides an opportunity for deeper connection, shared experiences, creating lasting memories. Yep, haven't done that. Week-long vacation every two years. This longer trip allows for a more significant and immersive experience, strengthening the bond and creating a sense of adventure. So if you don't know now, you know the 2-2-2 rule in relationships, a guideline suggesting couples dedicate specific times to each other Date night every two weeks, a weekend getaway every two months and a week-long vacation every two years. I definitely can see how these things are so important. So I hope that all of you will take these. Let it sink in, let it marinate.

Speaker 1: 19:28

Men, I would love to hear your feedback on this information. Like I said, these things I took from the men I interviewed, and there were other factors. They talked about trust and loyalty. A strong foundation of trust is essential for any relationship. I can't tell you how many times I talk about that and preach that to several people that I talk to. Loyalty and honesty, being reliable and honest with him, is vital. I mean, I think that goes both ways. A good sense of humor, sharing laughter and enjoying each other's company can make a significant difference. In essence, a man's happiness in a relationship is closely tied to feeling valued, respected and supported by his partner. So, men, I hope you are listening out there and realize that I hear you and I wanted to share with the ladies out there what's important to the men, so that we know what our role is in making the men happy, because I know the previous episodes. I was kind of talking about what the women want, what we're looking for, what the men are doing wrong, and you know now I'm talking about. Okay, this is what the men want.

Speaker 1: 21:01

The other thing I want to share with you is I've told you that I am Jill of all trades, master of none, so I dabble in a lot of different things and one of them is astrology. This was something that and I know it's worldly. The reason that I know about it is my mom brought it to me because I went into customer service and sales and she wanted me to have these tools to use to my benefit in customer service and sales, because she felt that a lot of this information was relative towards how to sell to somebody, how to create trust, and I'll give you an example to my Libra friends out there. So I know, as far as Libras go, like, libras like to keep the scales balanced. So if you're looking to sell them something, when you pitch it to them, it has to make sense to them. And even if it makes sense to them, they, the scales have to be balanced. It's like okay, it's going to cost me this much money, why? Hmm, let's see what are the benefits. And so they want to make sure that they are making a sound, conscious decision. That's balanced, okay.

Speaker 1: 22:37

Whereas a fiery sign say an Aries or a Leo or maybe even a Sagittarius oh, red sports car 75,000, goes fast, get me all the chicks. Sure, where do I sign? Okay, that was an extreme example, but I'm just using that as an example. And then we start integrating oh, but what's your rising sign? What's your sun sign? What's your sun sign? What do other people see you as? So there are a lot of factors involved, but I kind of want to bring that in a little bit in another episode. I want to talk about the signs and how they could be relative to the partner that you choose If you're so inclined to wanting to know that. If you're not, that's okay. I do think there's some truth to it and from reading about the signs.

Speaker 1: 23:46

Funny, yesterday I had a family day with my daughter and our nana and papa her Nana and Papa and at our last stop the bartender brought out this book on birthdays and he was like oh, you should look up your birthday. It talks about your strengths, your weaknesses, what you like, what you don't like, what health concerns you want to keep an eye out for, et cetera. And my daughter read it and we she looked up all of our birthdays and read the pros, the cons, the and. We all were in agreement like, yeah, that sounds like me and yes, that's very much me, and so it was really interesting to hear that information out loud once again, even though I know a lot about it, because my mom gave me this book several books and it was our way of bonding. So you know my mom loved read and so it gave us an opportunity to connect and bond over astrology and share our ideas and opinions and thoughts. And, yes, that was, that was one of the ways that we connected, so I have fond memories of that, so I thought I would throw that in.

Speaker 1: 25:16

Since we're talking about relationships, would you want to know what is your compatible sign? And or maybe you're dating somebody and you're like, oh, I don't know if they're a match for me based on this, and you're like, oh, I don't know if they're a match for me based on this, and while some of you may believe, others may not. It just adds another layer of information that might be helpful, a helpful tool, if you will, to look at that and go, hmm, okay, yeah, I could see. Like I'll use myself, for example. So I am July baby, I'm a Cancer and it's interesting. So Cancer is the crab, and crabs love the sun. They love the heat, right? Well, I am all about that. I love the sun, I love the heat, right? Well, I am all about that. I love the sun, I love the heat. I hate the cold. If you upset me, I definitely go into my shell. It talks about that.

Speaker 1: 26:22

We love to be creative and be on stage and be a star, whether it be singing, dancing, cooking. And be a star, whether it be singing, dancing, cooking, whatever. And it's funny as my daughter was reading all these things about cancer and was like I don't know. It took Nana and Papa saying, well, yes, she is all of those things. She loves to sing, she sings karaoke, she loves dancing, she sings karaoke, she loves dancing, she has a podcast and that's a platform. And my own daughter, brooklyn, was like, oh, I didn't even think about all those things, because she knows so many things about me that those things didn't necessarily stand out to her. What stood out to her is like mama Elkie, nurturing, giving advice, that sort of thing. So, yeah, just a little fun facts to add some more layers to the relationship advice Thought it might be fun.

Speaker 1: 27:28

So stay tuned for the next episode where we'll dive into a little bit more deeper into what signs are you compatible with? Or now do I need to give the woman's list of what is the woman looking for? What are the deal breakers? And I want to make sure that I say thank you to my loyal listeners, but also my loyal subscribers. Lisa roberts curbelo still trying to make that double date. Girls night still trying to make that double date, girls night, still trying to connect with you, thank you. Thank you for your loyal subscription. I appreciate you. Looks like you had a great time salsa-ing over the weekend salsa dancing.

Speaker 1: 28:26

Jeff Parra, thank you for your words of wisdom that I come across on social media. You for your words of wisdom that I come across on social media. He always has information that feeds the soul that I appreciate. So, jeff namaste, kyle Few, thank you. Thank you so much for writing Commitment to love. Love is a verb found on Amazon, audible. I say this in every one of my episodes. Guys, girls, ladies, gents, if you're looking for information about love and what the meaning is behind it, this is a great book to have to read, to learn, educate yourself, educate your partner, read it with your partner. I I just am finding it to be a very insightful tool in my toolbox. Mike Kaufman, thank you for your loyal subscription. I appreciate you. I appreciate you listening and giving your occasional comments and feedbacks on the episodes. Thank you, and, of course, kara, kara Kitchell, kara Kenfield I think she goes by Kitchell, though. Thank you for your loyal subscription. I really appreciate you.

Speaker 1: 30:05

Guys, this woman is multi-talented. Multi-talented sings, dances, creates poetry is a fabulous cook. She has an Etsy. It's called lovemyartistetsycom, and she has everything from all kinds of clothing items that have poetry or her artwork or, um, a killer backpack purple, black and white zebra backpack that could also be used to put your laptop in. Um, all leather real leather comes from Italy. And then matching boots purple, black and white, zebra. I will have you one of these days backpack and boots. But also she makes wedding favors and music videos as sort of a momentum for people that have birthdays or anniversaries, and so you should check out her site. And then Tom Guzik, her other half. He does more rustic art, a more rustic approach of hanging ornaments or wall art, and his is minerpickstudiosetsycom. Definitely recommend you check out their websites. Maybe you're looking for something for Mother's Day that's coming up we have Memorial Day coming up, so and their prices are very reasonable and they're both super talented, so be sure to check them out.

Speaker 1: 31:55

Last but not least, coming back to Persimmon Dental Persimmon Dental the people that keep my teeth white, clean, cavity free, located in the Persimmon Plaza in Dublin. Be sure to use hashtag Elkivate when you go and see them. It is a family practice and the staff there is wonderful and they will treat you like family. And, yeah, I just I really appreciate them. I have been going there for years, years. So I think that's it. I think that's all I have for now, so I think I'm going to sign off.

Speaker 1: 32:44

So thank you for tuning in, thank you for listening, and I will look forward to your texting, your ideas, your comments, your questions. Remember that you can find me on YouTube now, where I do a video version of this and I'm here for you. I am here for your comments, concerns, questions. So please text in your ideas, your questions, your concerns. I would love to hear from you, I would love to share your story and give you the answers, the feedback that you are aimlessly looking for, looking for. And remember you can find me on YouTube, amazon Music, also Apple and Spotify, among all the other podcast platforms. Those are the most common. I think that covers it. Thank you so much for tuning in and listening. Ciao for now.