Codependent Doctor
Podcast focusing on codependency. Learning how to create healthier relationships, healthier self and healthier lives.
Codependent Doctor
57: Science Meets Soul: Burnout Recovery and Holistic Wellness with Samantha Stoltz
Neuroscience researcher and wellness coach Samantha Stoltz joins me to talk about what burnout really is, why it’s more than just exhaustion, and how the mind-body connection shapes our health in powerful ways. Samantha shares her own journey through burnout and the science-backed, soul-centered practices that helped her rebuild balance. From breaking limiting beliefs to creating small sustainable shifts through habit stacking, this conversation is packed with tools to help you shine from the inside out.
✨ Check out Samantha’s Linktree, Website, and grab her free book Little Book for a Better Life.
You can buy my books now on Amazon.
🦋 Enough As I Am - A healing workbook for anyone navigating people-pleasing, guilt, or self-abandonment. It’s filled with practical tools to help you build boundaries and reclaim your self-worth.
🖋️ Enough As I Grow - A 365-day journal with daily prompts to guide you through your healing journey one day at a time.
If you're interested in a list of books that I recommend to help you on your journey you can request it by clicking on the link in my show notes.
🖋️ Enough as I Grow 365 day Guided Journal on Amazon
Affiliate Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases, at no extra cost to you.
📰 Sign up for my Newsletter
🛜 My Website DrAngelaDowney
Email: codependentdoctor@gmail.com
Social Media links: Here
🎵 Music: Touching The Air by Graceful Movement
Today's episode is going to be such a good one. We're talking with Samantha Stoltz. She's a neuroscience researcher and wellness coach who's all about bridging the gap between science and the soul. We're diving into what burnout really looks like beneath the surface, how to restore balance through mind, body and energy practices, and the small but powerful shifts that can help you create habits that actually last. So if you're feeling drained, stuck or just ready to shine a little brighter from the inside out, then you're definitely going to want to stick around for this conversation.
Speaker 1:Welcome to the Codependent Doctor, a podcast where we unpack the messy, beautiful journey of healing from codependency. If you're burned out from people-pleasing, stuck in unhealthy patterns or just tired of putting yourself last, you're in the right place. I'm Dr Angela Downey, a family doctor and fellow codependent, and I'm here to help you reconnect to your authentic self. One honest conversation at a time. Here we go. Hello to all my wonderful podcast listeners and welcome to the 57th episode of the Codependent Doctor. I'm your host, dr Angela Downey, a family doctor and fellow codependent, who's here to help untangle our patterns, heal our hearts and reclaim our peace.
Speaker 1:For today's episode, we have a guest with us. Samantha Stoltz is a neuroscience researcher, a wellness coach, dedicated to helping people integrate science and soul for lasting transformation. She holds a bachelor in biology and is currently pursuing a master's in applied biomedical engineering at John Hopkins University. Samantha is the founder and host of the Shine In and Out podcast, where she explores topics at the intersection of personal growth, energetic health and holistic success. So welcome, samantha. I'm so glad that you're able to join us today. How are you doing?
Speaker 2:I'm wonderful.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much. I'm so excited to have you on the show. I think that what you're doing is really special bringing together neuroscience and wellness in a way that actually helps people connect the dots between science and the soul. That's such an important conversation to have, and I know that my listeners are going to get so much out of hearing your perspective. So one of the traditions on my show is that we discuss what we're grateful for, because when we stop and think about the things that we're grateful for, it really helps our brains focus on what's working instead on what's missing or what's broken. So I'd like to ask is there anything that you're especially grateful for today?
Speaker 2:Absolutely. I mean, among all of the things I'm grateful for, something that's unique today is the realization of even the small reminders that we have that there is so much good in the world if we choose to look for it. That just has been my awe-inspiring thing of the day and it's there.
Speaker 1:Sometimes it's harder to see, but it's good to look at it and to look for those things For myself. I'm grateful for fresh air, which is such a simple thing that we take for granted, but I live in Manitoba in Canada, which is just north of North Dakota and my province has been on fire for most of the summer.
Speaker 1:And it's only recently that we've really started having some smoke-free days. So I feel like even though the sun's been out, it's been kind of blocked out by this haze. You smell smoke every day and it's really hard on people who have like asthma or other lung conditions. So I'm glad that the fresh air is finally coming back and for anybody who is relocated, they're finally able to start going home. So I am so grateful to finally be able to enjoy some of the summer.
Speaker 2:That is huge Good fresh air that comes with it. Yeah, last summer with the fires in Canada, I was in Maryland and there was smoke coming through there and we had all these warnings.
Speaker 1:So, samantha, you are a neuroscience researcher and a wellness coach, and that's a really unique combination of skills, so can you share a little bit about your journey and what inspired you to start your podcast? Shine In and Out Sure.
Speaker 2:My journey is characterized by both curiosity and my personal struggles. I have always been fascinated by science because it didn't come as naturally to me as, say, literature, psychology, humanities All of that was just like my automatic zone of genius. But the science was hard and I realized that all of the most satisfying things for me came from the most challenging things from the beginning. So I said you know what, every time I am uncomfortable, I grow and I am inspired to study for science, even though it's scary. And I actually did better in organic chemistry than I did in accounting, because which, which is considered the hardest class, you know of the degree, and just because I enjoyed studying for it, I could bring myself to want to practice. I loved it. It's like I was solving a puzzle.
Speaker 2:So as a neuroscientist, I spend my days trying to understand how our biology shapes the way we feel and how we feel shapes our biology.
Speaker 2:And I'm hoping to do a PhD in psychoneuroimmunology or health psychology or something like that.
Speaker 2:But I went through my own health challenges health psychology or something like that. But I went through my own health challenges and it made me realize that so many people are living in a way that they don't have to suffering when they don't understand that it's a choice. And so, as I embarked on my healing journey and saw how big of a difference not just my physical health but my mental health and my perspective in general, those shifts were incredible and I felt the need to share them with people because, as soon as you realize that life can be simple and easy, and amazing and pleasurable instead of suffering and negativity and looping in those difficult thoughts, the podcast became the space where, first of all, I'm trying to combine my two favorite topics science and soul and help people heal themselves, feel empowered to take charge of their health, and to do so in a preventative way rather than a reactive way once they have a diagnosis or a tragedy. I want everybody to be healthy and happy, you know, just because you deserve to be.
Speaker 1:I love how you, you know, mentioned that negativity is a choice, and being stuck in negativity is a choice that we make, because you can choose to be the opposite, and that's what your podcast is all about is working towards getting there. So you said that you're passionate about bridging the gap between science and the soul, and so what does that mean to you?
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's definitely two worlds that aren't naturally combined, and many people think that they're mutually exclusive. But when I talk about bridging the science and the soul, what I mean is honoring both sides of what make us human. Of course, we're bodies made of molecules and cells, hormones and genes, and our nervous system is a huge player in this, and that's the science. But, as humans, what makes us the most advanced species is our ability to communicate. We're storytellers. We have beliefs and dreams and memories and an inner voice that watches those thoughts that you are behind the thoughts.
Speaker 2:You're not your thoughts. You are the soul watching your thoughts, and your thoughts are just a combination of everything that you've gone through in your life and all of your perspectives and things you've heard from your parents and from media, and you can be mindful of those thoughts and ask yourself are these mine? Are these opinions mine? Is this judgment mine, or is it something I just, you know, picked up as a habit along the way? And if so, maybe I want to shift it to a better thought until that becomes the natural thought that comes up. So is it fair to?
Speaker 1:say that we're basically we're all made up of cells and they're all put together in this structured way and it's basically all the same. But how our lived experiences affect us is what makes us special and different. So the cells are the same, but it's those lived experiences put together that makes us all individuals.
Speaker 2:Totally the extent of our communication and the mere aspect of metacognition. Being able to think about our thinking is what sets us apart from all other species. And you have the science that tells you chronic stress alters inflammation and all of these things. But your soul reminds you that the story that you're telling yourself about the stress and whether you feel safe and feel connected shapes how it all plays out in our body, way more than people realize. And I think the bridge between the two is essential to have any form of lasting transformation, because you can focus on the science, the data. You can eat this, breathe like that, track your metrics and you might get results, but they don't always stick because they might be surface level habits that are missing the deeper.
Speaker 2:Why the intention, the meaning, purpose that you need to be healthy. For and for me it's always been. I know I want to have children, I want my epigenetics to be spot on by that time and I want to be healthy enough that I can spread the knowledge and the experience that I have gained through healing myself and just changing my whole life and perspective and giving that gift to other people. And I can't do that if I'm not healthy. So the soul gives you the devotion to keep showing up for yourself, even when it's uncomfortable, and they turn together. Soul and science turns habits into a new way of being.
Speaker 1:True transformation Are there a lot of people who are skeptical of the mind-body connection.
Speaker 2:I've definitely seen it. I think now less than ever, because we are developing the tools to quantify the mind-body connection, especially the gut-brain axis and all of those things. I to remind people that your thoughts and emotions are signals and they run through very real biological pathways. Your brain talks to your body and even if you just tell yourself something, the placebo effect. For instance, if they did a study where actually there was a really radical study where they did placebo surgery on people and they were able to walk after even though they had only made an incision and then stitched it back up.
Speaker 2:So when somebody is diagnosed with something, it's so important to get across one that the doctors should be showing confidence in their treatment plan, because people listen to their doctors and the body responds. There's another study that they did, those histamine tests, the prick tests, and when the doctor came in and put hydrocortisone or something antihistamine and told them that it was going to make it better, 10 minutes later they came back the rash was better and they told the experimental group that it was going to get worse. Same cream and the rash got worse, got worse. So it's first of all the ideas that we're putting into patients' heads very important to make it clear that a positive expectation of your health outcomes and the trust in your body are so much more powerful than you realize, and staying in that fear instead of the hope can actually be the difference between life and death can actually be the difference between life and death, for sure Interesting, you know.
Speaker 1:You see it all the time when somebody kind of loses hope in their ability to recover from something, they deteriorate much faster. Yeah, absolutely so. One of the themes that you focus on is burnout, and a lot of people think that burnout is just being really tired, but you've said that it's deeper than that. What are some of the root causes that we often miss.
Speaker 2:We are meant to have a stress response in an acute moment.
Speaker 2:So a predator is chasing you, you get fight or flight, you run or you hide or you freeze whatever, but then you move out of it, back into rest and digest.
Speaker 2:The way that we live today has so many people living in consistent fight or flight and it breaks my heart to see it, especially now that you know, I've identified it in myself and recovered from it. The people that I love, you know, are doing it and even when I talk to them they're like oh no, no, I hormones like your cortisol gets out your memory, your focus, your emotions, your motivation, for sure. And so if you think about having even a common cold and what our body tells us to do with that level of inflammation, it's rest. Don't get out of bed, don't do anything kind of isolate yourself socially, don't really want to eat all those things. Those things are also in depression and in any type of low-level inflammation that you may have, which is pretty much a direct correlation to the stress that you're putting yourself under. So I always encourage people to acknowledge that correlation and inflammation is, I mean, behind all of the human diseases I can think of neurodegenerative cardiovascular aging in general, all of it.
Speaker 1:It's amazing when people are sick, when we've got a cold, we don't take the time to rest anymore, we don't take the time to take care of ourselves. We just take a pill. That's going to make us less drowsy, it's going to clear up our sinuses because we are going to push through, we're going to go to work anyway. We don't take time for ourselves for any reason anymore, and it does contribute to this constant fight or flight response. Right there we we perceive threats at every corner every time we turn around, whether it's an exam that's coming up or whatnot, and we just we're stuck in the state of constant anxiety. It does wreak havoc on our bodies and we don't take the time that we need to rest and recoup our, our energy and recoup our energy.
Speaker 2:So, when you think about it's crazy to me, like on the systems level, that those things are touted as what we're supposed to be doing. First of all, my old company that I worked for would make people come into work when they're sick Okay, so you're okay with having more employees getting sick and having everybody out or and having everybody be less productive for you, yeah, and. And not letting people rest so that they can come back and be their best selves? It's. It's something in the systems that I would love to see more leaders implementing the ideals of caring for oneself and creating that balance between work and self-care oneself and creating that balance between work and self-care. And I hope you know we can make that movement happen.
Speaker 1:For sure. And we look at people who come into work even though they're sick and we rejoice that they're there and you're so strong and you just keep going. So there's this hustle culture where we just feel this need to keep going right when it's bred into us almost to just keep going, even though you're not well. Yeah, so when you talk about holistic wellness, you include not only just the mind and body, but energy as well. So can you walk us through that integrated approach and what that might look like in everyday life?
Speaker 2:integrated approach and what that might look like in everyday life. Yeah, so holistic wellness means looking at yourself as more than separate parts to fix. The mind, the body and the energy are all things that encompass us and that we bring into the world and in everyday life. You might start your morning with stillness to set your mental tone, nourish your body with foods that support steady energy and move in ways that keep your circulation and breath flowing. But it's also tending to your relationships and your environment, and what you expose yourself to. It's what you're consuming. You're not just consuming food. You're consuming media, you're consuming news. You're consuming everything that you put yourself in those situations.
Speaker 2:If you have draining relationships, that is your energy. When you feel that you've talked to somebody and you feel exhausted afterwards, that is your energy, telling you okay, maybe some alone time or maybe let's be around people that fuel our energy, because there are absolutely the opposite end of the spectrum, people that light you up. And so it's not about perfection or checking boxes. It's about noticing when one or all of those dimensions feel out of sync and gently working all of them together to bring them back into alignment, because if we always work on them as separate parts. There's always going to be something missing and the symptoms will persist.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's a different kind of exhaustion when that energy is that, when you spend all day doing something that goes against what your natural tendencies are. It's a different kind of exhaustion.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so many people don't know what their natural tendencies are, though they don't take the time to sit with themselves and get to know what their true values are. And you see so many people unsatisfied with their life, and they don't even know why, because they don't know what they want, and you can't get what you want if you don't know what you want. So even just sitting, forcing yourself to not be entertained or overstimulated for a moment, and focusing on you and getting to know your soul self not the self that you know society allowed to come about, that can be so powerful it's.
Speaker 1:It's scary trying to get to know yourself and allowing other people to know the true you it's. It's a lot easier to go with the flow and go with what society tells you that that you should be doing. So I can understand why it might be easier for somebody to do that, because it is scary having to sit with yourself and not be overwhelmed by all the media coming your way and TV and numbing out.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, numbing out is completely the easy way to go and I don't blame anybody for choosing it, because our brains are wired to be lazy, like to expend the least amount of energy possible. So if you can just sit and watch TV, amazing High dopamine for doing so little. Same with scrolling. But the idea of sitting with yourself in silence is scary to so many people because they don't do it. And once you do it, they're afraid of all of these thoughts and traumas and memories coming up.
Speaker 2:But if you can just sit with them and breathe through it, even for a short amount of time, and little by little show yourself that it's not so scary, that you can do it and that, if anything, it's cathartic, your life will be changed forever. And as far as what you were saying about presenting yourself as somebody who you're not, I absolutely did that for a very long time. I was such a perfectionist I, you know, wanted everybody to like me, yeah, and I just, you know, folded around what I thought people wanted to see in here. And then I realized that we all have our own perspectives and we have zero influence on each other's and zero control over how people perceive you, regardless of how you're attempting to come across, and so it is literally impossible.
Speaker 2:We definitely try, but it is literally impossible to do, especially for a mass of people, because everybody has their different upbringing, their different belief systems, and one person might think you're being selfish and another person might think, wow, she takes care of herself. That's amazing. You can't win, so the best thing you can do is be yourself, because you also can't lose and yes, it's scary because you might lose people along the way, but those are people that aren't meant to be in your life. If it's so easy for them to step away, if you're showing your true colors Right, the more you do, that, I think it becomes. We all have something to share with the world, based on those collection of different moments throughout our entire lives and our genes and everything our ancestors' genes. It's amazing, and if you take the time to acknowledge, acknowledge your personal power in that, I think hopefully more people will allow themselves to be themselves.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it takes a lot less energy to be yourself than it is for you to try and create this persona that you're going to be good enough, that you perceive to be good enough for other people. So, you'll regain a lot of energy just by being who you are and being okay with that, so true.
Speaker 2:I used to think for so long before I said anything because I was so afraid, like what if this offends somebody? Let me like word this correctly. And now I just like throw jokes out there and if it doesn't fly, fine. I thought it was funny.
Speaker 1:If you don't like my jokes, I'm going to go over there with those people who do like my jokes. So often it's not just stress itself, but it's the stories that we tell ourselves that's keeping us stuck. So what are the most common limiting beliefs that you see in people and how can they begin to shift some of those beliefs that are keeping them stuck?
Speaker 2:Absolutely and I don't want to discount that. The stress is there, even though these are beliefs that we can change. The stress is real. But say common beliefs, like I have to do it all myself or rest, means I am lazy or if I slow down I'll fall behind or simply I can't do it. Those stories keep you running on empty.
Speaker 2:The shift is when you have the awareness, the belief, in the moment, where you catch that thought and you say is this actually true? Like debunk yourself, make it funny. Even I've laughed over some of the things that my brain comes up with and I even say laugh at the fear, like that's hilarious Fear. I'm not going to let you get in the way of my purpose. You're so cute for thinking you could you know. And it's okay that it's there, it's natural that it's there, it's evolutionary that it's there and you can replace those thoughts.
Speaker 2:I always say you're not responsible for your first thought because those are programmed through your whole life and everything that you've heard and read and experienced. But the second thought you are completely in control of, as long as you are mindful of the first one, and asking is it actually true? Is it a habit, a habitual thought, or is it my soul speaking? And the more you do that, those pathways get stronger and the more you replace them with the second thought that you would rather be thinking such as I'm resting to fuel myself and I will be better tomorrow for it, those become the first thoughts eventually. It's a process and it absolutely is daunting, but one day you will look back and be wowed amazed that you used to think like that and you didn't have to that whole time.
Speaker 1:Rest is lazy is definitely one of the thoughts that runs through my mind all the time. I'm stuck in this productivity mode and this hustle culture and I've got so many great ideas. I just want to put them all into play now. And you know, sitting on the couch in the quiet is hard for me sometimes and although I can question myself and is this true? Is rest really lazy? And on a theoretical level, I know that that's not true and that it will help me to be more productive, but it is something I need to constantly work at.
Speaker 1:I went on vacation recently. I was gone for a week. I brought my computer with me with the intention of putting in a couple of hours here and there and I said you know, it'll be okay to do that. And I didn't open up my laptop once, which was shocking to me and I was like you know what? It's okay, it'll be there when I get home. There is nothing that I have to do right now, but I do need to talk to myself and to remind myself that it's okay to not be productive every hour of the day.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. Sometimes I get home from work and I'm exhausted and I'm like I should do this, this and this, and I'm like you know what?
Speaker 1:It's okay, it's okay to just relax, Nothing is not sending that one email is not going to change anything. Right, I can relax tonight and not think about work. Exactly.
Speaker 2:And all of those things, those thoughts, those patterns, if you look at how you felt before and how you powered through and came out of it after especially when you were scared of something, but you did it anyway and looking back after that moment and thinking, okay, that went really well. I was super scared, though, and that was real, but next time I'm super scared. I'm going to think of this moment, this relief, this trust that I've built with myself that I can handle anything, and it's okay to start with small, low stakes situations and see it as practice.
Speaker 1:Yeah, for sure, and it does take time, but eventually you won't have to remind yourself all the time that it's going to be okay. You're just going to know that it's okay and you're just going to take that time to rest. So, making these changes in life, these are pretty big changes and it's easy to get inspired and to make big changes, but it's a lot harder to sustain them over a longer period of time. So do you have any practical steps or routines that you recommend to help create habits that last longer?
Speaker 2:That's so true, and I've been there. Big bursts of inspiration are super exciting, but that lasting change is built in the small, repeatable steps and in the narrative that you have of yourself and your life. You can break habits and make habits any day, but if you decide I am someone who takes care of myself and you live with that value it becomes a lifestyle, not a habit. And I always recommend starting with one habit at a time, because oftentimes I would try to change everything at once and it's just not feasible. So, one habit at a time. Attach it to something that you already do.
Speaker 2:It's called habit stacking, I believe, and so I decided that I wanted to have my dishes done more often instead of letting them sit. So while I was brewing my coffee and I was waiting for it to come out, I'm not just going to stand there, I'm going to do my dishes and feel amazing that my sink is empty. And that's just a tiny example. But while you're brushing your teeth, you can focus on your breathing. While you're eating lunch, you can choose to do it mindfully and take the extra five minutes to go for a walk instead of looking at your phone for a while. And they're small things that aren't so intimidating, but they do have great effects and they become anchored in your daily rhythm because they're so rewarding and over time it is real transformation because your brain wires them as normal and you can't fathom going back to the way that you lived before, because this is so much better in every way.
Speaker 1:That's amazing. I think was it the book Atomic Habits? Yes, I forget what the name of the book was, but yeah, you talk about habit stacking.
Speaker 1:So now every time you brew your coffee, you just do the dishes. It's one thing, and while your coffee's brewing, you're getting something done and it feels good. And so now, every day, every time you go to brew your coffee, you know that you need to do the dishes. So it is a good way to start building habits as you go along is by stacking them with something else that you already do. Yeah, exactly, would you be willing to share maybe a time in your life when you hit burnout and what helped you move through it?
Speaker 2:Yeah. So for me it happened pretty early. Like I said, I was a perfectionist and I was trying to do everything and I put myself under so much chronic stress that I don't think I was ever not stressed and I was completely living in fight or flight all the time. And so by junior year of high school, when I'm preparing for the SATs, on top of everything else the sports, the clubs, the, you know, leadership positions and the exams and grades I for a really long time thought that that was important, about who I was, that the production of all A's the outcome of my hard work, and I thought that exhaustion was just the price of being ambitious, where I just did not feel right. My brain was foggy, my body battery was like 2%, even though I got a full eight hours of sleep, and I was having aches and pains from that low-grade inflammation. And so I decided I have to listen to my body because for a while I admit it, I tried to push through it. I was like nope, this is who I am, I am not going to change that. I want to get all A's and you know, whatever.
Speaker 2:But as it got progressively worse and my body wouldn't stop trying to tell me these things, I caved, and it wasn't just those habits, like the eating better and the exercising, which definitely played a huge part.
Speaker 2:Diet plays a huge part, movement plays a huge part, but also the shifting of my priorities in general, my outlook on what matters in life, and it took me being unable to do everything that I cared about because my health was so messed up to realize that nothing matters without your health, you could have all the money in the world, you could have all the friends in the world, but if you can't get up and spend time with them or you can't stay awake long enough to learn what you're passionate about and you can't go for a walk and you can't travel, when somebody asks you to go travel and every part of you wants to except your body, you're so afraid you can't go for a walk and you can't travel.
Speaker 2:When somebody asks you to go travel and you're every part of you wants to accept your body, you're so afraid you can't keep up. So I got to that point and I just had to reset everything and it took time and I would say it got progressively better, but so slowly that I almost was in my new normal before I realized it and I just remember being able to walk one mile and that was like a huge deal for me because of all the pain the joint pain, the muscular pain, sometimes like bone and nerve pain it just wasn't happening for me for the longest time. Being able to walk I mean, going to the store was like all I could do for the day if I had to myself to rest. Sometimes it is so much more meaningful to me and that's why I'm trying to teach people to do it before anything happens, so that they don't have to go through the same thing. Learn from my mistakes Trust me on that, it's horrible and build your resilience over time so that you never have to get to that point.
Speaker 1:Yeah, sometimes it's hard to recognize that you're heading towards that point. Yeah, sometimes it's hard to recognize that you're heading towards that point. Yeah, you kind of get used to being in this state of chaos all the time that that becomes your new normal. Oh yeah, our body's getting addicted to it and you don't recognize yeah, you don't recognize that you're heading towards burnout 100%.
Speaker 2:Same thing with abusive relationships. You get addicted to that roller coaster of neurochemicals and hormones and it becomes your new normal and it doesn't mean it's good for you, you know. So just acknowledging that, okay, maybe I'm addicted to being stressed all the time, Maybe I'm addicted to the busyness, but it's not who I want to be. I want to be the healthiest version of myself and that's the first step. Just understanding, acknowledging.
Speaker 1:Right, and then having the courage to step back and really evaluate what's working and what's not working. Yes, yeah. So if someone is listening right now and they're feeling exhausted, maybe questioning the direction that they've taken in life, what would you say is the first gentle step that they can take to start shining from the inside out?
Speaker 2:I would say the very first step is to just give yourself permission to notice things, Notice what your body feels like, Notice what's at the forefront of your mind and become aware.
Speaker 2:Sometimes I like to do freeform writing or I'll set a voice memo on and just talk and stuff comes up that you, if you don't give yourself that time or that place to put it somewhere, you don't even know what's going on inside your head most of the time. So even if you just sit down free page of paper and start writing whatever is in your head, even if it's this is stupid, it's probably not going to work. But then as more thoughts come in, you continue to write and it slows down your thinking so much that you are able to observe it. And you get better and better at observing your thinking and seeing what isn't working for you. And oftentimes, by the end of a free flow writing session, when I start with a problem, I always end with oh wow, I just did therapy on myself just did therapy on myself Right, I saw that you have this free little book for a better life on your website.
Speaker 1:Is that where people can find that? I can probably put it in the show notes as well.
Speaker 2:It's what I consider to be the infrastructure, the perspective shifts that you should be reading every day I don't care if it's on the toilet in the morning to remember to shift those certain perspectives and everything will fall into place from there. I wrote it before I was giving a presentation and I had a bunch of them printed and handed them out at the end, and it's just some of the things that I've learned that are at the forefront of that infrastructure to becoming your happiest and healthiest self. So I also recorded a video for people who prefer to listen or wanted to hear more about it than just reading the brief. You know bullets on the pages, but I was excited to share that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm going to make sure that all of that's in the show notes so that people can find your book and your video and find you quite easily. So, Samantha, I want to thank you for being on the show. This conversation has been such a gift, not just for my listeners, but also for me as well. I like the way that you break down science and mix it with that soul piece. It really gives me a lot to think about for my own life and I know I'm going to be taking a lot of this with me. So I want to thank everyone for hanging out with us today.
Speaker 1:If you liked the episode, I'd love it if you would share it with someone who needs to hear it and heck, share it with the whole world. I'd love to help more people out there. I'd also really appreciate it if you'd be so kind as to follow me and maybe leave a comment. I'm most active on Facebook, at the Codependent Doctor, and on Instagram, at drangeladowney. I wish you all a great week as you learn to foster a better relationship with the most important person in your life yourself. I'm going to talk to you again in two weeks for another episode of the Codependent Doctor. Take care for now You've got this. Thanks for spending time with me today. I hope something in this episode resonated with you. If it did hit, follow, subscribe or share it with someone who needs to hear it today. The codependent doctor is not medical advice and doesn't replace speaking to your healthcare provider. If you're in a crisis, please go to the nearest ER or call 911 or reach out to your local mental health helpline. I'll be back here next week with more support stories and