The Dad Bods and Dumbbells Podcast
The hosts Mitch and Bart discuss fitness, fatherhood, and guy stuff to help men live a great life, have fun, laugh, and get a little more fit in this weekly Podcast.
The Dad Bods and Dumbbells Podcast
Table Topics with Britt, Mitch, and Bart (Part 1)
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Our summer series continues with returning guest Brit as we dive into the challenges of parenting during summer break, conspiracy theories we find most plausible, and celebrating marriage milestones.
• Creating structure during summer break to avoid the dreaded "I'm bored" from kids
• Dealing with mixed emotions when kids are away at summer camp
• The mathematical probability of extraterrestrial life and unexplained phenomena like the Phoenix Lights
• Conversation about spirituality, beliefs, and mutual respect among friends with different perspectives
• Finding thoughtful ways to celebrate long-term marriages without breaking the bank
• Creating experiences that nurture both spouses rather than just checking the anniversary box
Barton’s RIVIAN Referral Code: BARTON16694413
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Welcome & Sponsor Introductions
Speaker 1Welcome to DadBods and Dumbbells. My name is Mitch.
Speaker 2Hey, I'm Bart.
Speaker 1And we are so glad you like, subscribe and do all the things for our show DadBods and Dumbbells. We are here today, sponsored by Solutions Pharmacy. If you have weight issues, if you have hair issues, if you have pee-pee issues, talk to Solutions Pharmacy. They fix Bart's pee-pee issues they fix, fixed my hair issues and they fixed my weight issues.
Speaker 1So I only have two out of the three, but you know what? There's no shame because it's discreet. You'll enjoy that. And if you're looking to get fit, if you're looking to build endurance, power, strength, whatever it is, check out team Brian wellness, our own Bart, and Brian runs and owns the wonderful group of fitness experts that are going to get you to where you want to be, ultimately, to reach all of your goals.
Speaker 2Yeah, in all seriousness, I've got four trainers and myself. We really concierge style training all over the city, but mainly downtown Westlake, a little bit in Tarrytown and kind of central Austin. But if you really want customized high level personal training that's either at your home or at a place near you Let us know.
Summer Parenting Challenges
Speaker 1Bart has not asked me to be one of his trainers. So you are safe, marked as safe. The next one if you are a runner, if you're not a runner, if you're a girl, if you're a boy, if you're a big boy, if you're a little girl, if you're a big girl, doesn't matter, check out bigboysrun2.com. This is where you can join a run club in your area as well as get merch. If you want to wear it, because you know what, you're loud and proud and you like to run, Cool. If you want to wear it ironically, like my wife does, check it out bigboysrun2.com. On today's show we have a special, special, very special guest and good friend, and he's back guest. Oh, his name is brit brit. You did a lot of things. I talked about your bio before. Yeah, you're a dad. You uh, do marketing in the health care space, but you're just an all-around great guy. Oh, also amateur comedian sometimes yeah, I can be funny.
Speaker 3Very cool very cool.
Speaker 1so brit has decided to join us. Well, we forced him to join us to be a part of our summer series, and today we're going to do our specialty Zen spin. Zen spins.
Speaker 3The Zen 10 spin yes, very good.
Speaker 2Quick question Mitch.
Speaker 3Britt, how are?
Speaker 2we doing.
Speaker 3Me? Yeah, you oh the royal we. How are we doing me? Yeah, you oh the royal we how are we doing? Yes, we are good summer.
Speaker 3It's a different vibe, a different with kids, yes, I will tell you, I'm not a creature of habit or routine, but it does help. When I have to get up and get the boys to go to school and they have to be there on time. I'm like it really does help my day. Now. I'm the only person helping me do all these things and I'm the only person helping me do all these things and I'm like, oh no. So I actually do thrive better in a routine. But yeah, we're getting into the summer, Do you have?
Speaker 2any issues. This is how I know it's a good day. I will come back in from like training all morning and then, if my son is still in his PJs, probably something's struggling, if he's dressed and kind of got the uh hair done and it looks like there's a semblance of a day about to happen, I'm like, oh, we're off to a good start.
Speaker 3Yeah, we're gonna be productive in some form or fashion somehow.
Speaker 1Yes, so for me, I. So I typically am the one that I'm most flexible. My wife runs a practice, so she's gotten an eight, comes back at six or seven or whenever it's done, right, right. So I'm the one kind of making sure if the camps happen, that's going to help and benefit me. Otherwise they stay at home, uh, all by themselves. I mean, they're old enough all by themselves, but doing God knows what, or coming to work here with me or whatever. So where do you fit in that line? Are you, is is the wifey, handling most of this, or are you fully involved in making sure that your kids go to certain camps and all that stuff?
Speaker 3I help with pick up and drop off, for sure. I love doing that. Um, if they're at home, I go to the office. I actually function better at the office and get more done.
Speaker 3If I'm at home, then it's like people's choice award and my kids and my wife are going to win over my responsibilities for for for work, and over my responsibilities for for for work, yeah, and so I always find myself less engaged and way less productive. So if I can go to the office, it's like I'm excited to get done, get as much done as I can, and then I can go home. Um, yeah, my wife's way better than me at like, she made a list and they mark it off with a, like a dry erase and she, like laminated it and all the things we do for the summer to earn screen time to be able to play the xbox really oh yeah, she's in it because she also works nights.
Speaker 3She's a nurse, so it's like she will, you know, two days a week work nights, sleep during the day, then she'll have five days off to just that's cool hang with the boys too. So we go to the pool and all that fun stuff. That's awesome that's cool. So it sounds like you both have kind of some flexibility some semblance of flexibility to enjoy the yes yes, and if I, especially because you know piano lessons and different things don't stop just because it's the summer. So I mean whatever I can do to hang out.
Speaker 2It's a lot of. It's filling in the gaps between like, oh, I've got this at noon and then you got this at three, but what do you do from 12, 30 to 2, 30 and that kind of stuff? My main goal is just I.
Speaker 3Being bored to me is like blasphemy. I just don't believe you can be boy yeah, there's always something to do and you can make up something, do something. I, even we. I wrote down like I didn't write down, I looked up a bunch of stuff of like 50 things you can do. So you're never bored for kids and you're just like activity, activity, activity, all things that we all have. So they're not allowed to say I'm bored, I would love to share that on our, on our social screen notes.
Speaker 1I mean, if that's something you're willing to share, that's a really good tip, something so we can share that.
Speaker 2I would love that we have a star Wars puzzle on our dining room table that my son just like comes to and he'll just like work on it for like five or 10 minutes and sometimes he gets really into it because he's figured some piece out that is growing, but otherwise sometimes he'll just come through, do a few little pieces and go off and go to his bedroom and come back.
Speaker 1That's fun.
Speaker 2Just a few little things around the house that we can keep him active with.
Speaker 1The one thing with our kids right now is we have grandparents in San Antonio, and typically my father-in-law is a pastor, and so they have a VBS, they have a music camp and my daughter's aged out, but she wants to be a volunteer because she got to experience it.
Kids Away at Camp: Mixed Feelings
Speaker 1So she's the volunteer. My son was like I don't want to do any of those things and I said you're doing those things, and so my kids have been. Like my daughter did an overnight camp last week. This week they're over at san antonio. So I was so it nice, cause they have stuff to do, but my wife and I are all by ourselves and I thought empty nesters like I would be not only having sex every single day, but also like man, we're going to get to do this fun thing or this fun thing, and what it basically comes down to is it's just really boring.
Speaker 3How did it work out? How did that work out?
Speaker 1Expectations versus reality expectations, but I have to.
Speaker 1I do have to say that ultimately, I miss them so much that I drove down to San Antonio yesterday I canceled all my meetings and I was like, let's go swim in, let's go all those things and but I won't see him for the next six days and I'm I've always been a guy that's like let's not look at pictures of our kids when we're by, you know, together, let's just make it about us. And now I'm just like man, I miss it. They made me watch. I didn't make them make them watch. We were watching a movie and I was going to leave halfway through because I had to get home and they were like dad, don't go watch the rest of the movie with us please. And I was like, ok, they manipulated me back to it.
Speaker 1So it's actually been a tough summer for me already, because I'm like, am I trying to occupy them away from us? Like, at what point are they going to go? Are they just trying to bypass all of summer with us? Because we're doing overnight camps and we're doing all those things. So it's a tough balance for me, like, hey, come to work with me. That's boring for them. They just sit here and on their screens while I'm working and ultimately, it's like I don't know what the balance is.
Speaker 2It's. It's a challenging balance of like they need to. I mean, they just did school for nine months. Right, they need decompression, sure needs some sort of like. You know, take some of the the craziness out of life, so you, but then too much of that is wrong. Yeah, just like go stir crazy and then they get into trouble. Idle hands, though, what's that? Idle hands? Yeah, I mean that's bad news bears.
Speaker 2My kids will fight, my boys will fight by nine in the morning and I'm like yeah, oh, we're not speaking to each other for the rest of them.
Speaker 3Like you got a long day ahead of you uh, we got good kids in our neighborhood so they can play a lot together. Yeah, uh, and every parent parents differently on our neighborhood kid list. So it's like if you go to so-and-so's house, I'm like we're having celery sticks and no screens, I'm like go. But if at our house. I mean, we're like the Xbox play.
Speaker 1Cool Super smash bros at our house.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3So I don't know, I just want them to. I don't know. I, of course, because it's a summer's for, but I was a kid that always wanted to go to every single camp. I think every kids different like my youngest would do anything, yeah, with anybody, just to be a part of it. My oldest I need to actually get him out of the house more to be list of a homebody yeah, yeah, get out of his comfort zone.
Speaker 1Yeah, that's how my kids are, my daughter's like, that is the whole body. My son, you just can't stop them.
Speaker 2I think we just knocked out kids at home.
Speaker 1Oh, our Zen spin.
Speaker 2I completely forgot about it.
Speaker 1That was an organic intro, all right, well, I mean it seems like we got a natural progression here. Let's talk about Zens and spinning, If you want to pop the Zen and have one go enjoy.
Speaker 2I'm good. But, britt, why don't you spin it? I'm going to spin it.
Most Probable Conspiracy Theories
Speaker 3There's enjoy. I'm good. But yeah, britt, why don't you spin it?
Speaker 2I'm gonna say there's a little arrow on our topics, as you as mango, mango flavored, okay, no, free shout out. All right, we got most probable conspiracy.
Speaker 3Oh, this is a great one that we think that is the most, yeah really likely to be true. Most likely to be true of all the crazy.
Speaker 1Let me pop this in real quick. Okay, so this is the. I'm going to let you start. Oh, but ultimately this is the one that you feel like is this is a conspiracy. In general, people would generally be like don't be a conspiracy theorist. If you brought this up, right, that you most believe in and I want some reasons why.
Speaker 3Okay, I'm not a big conspiracy guy.
Speaker 1That's what most conspiracy theorists say before they start, oh, when they start.
Speaker 3And then they say but, and then they get deeper and deeper and deeper.
Speaker 1We're all aliens. You know something like that.
Speaker 3Oh, okay, I would think the most likely that's realistic is that there's for sure been evidence of extraterrestrial that's been covered up and that could be technology. I'm not talking about little green men with giant eyeballs.
Speaker 2Yeah, it doesn't have to be like that.
Speaker 3But I think there is something from there is intelligence from outside. Eyeballs, yeah, doesn't have to be like yeah, but I think there is something from there. Is intelligence from outside and since the nuclear age, technology has just ramped up so much that we had to reverse and engineered some of this stuff have you ever seen a uh, what they call now uaps, or?
Speaker 1never, never seen one, no bar. Have you seen one? I I've never seen one.
Speaker 3And again, I don't even really believe that you have. I've seen the Phoenix Lights.
Speaker 1Okay. So they're known to be like there's these lights. It's legendary. There's many documentaries and I lived in Phoenix for a while that they just kind of move randomly and hover and they're all around. And I was driving home from work one day and boom, there was just like multiple lights just weren't supposed to be there like floating lights yeah, in the sky okay. I mean, it's dark, you can't see what they are, right, but they're just like chill and they're like, and then they're moving real fast and like different spots okay and then all of a sudden they just poof, go away.
Speaker 1Those are the Phoenix lights of the call here's the thing.
Speaker 3The thing, though I am not against any conspiracy. I'm kind of open to everything, so I'm not an anti. I just don't. I just don't, I don't know, I don't know if I believe at all.
Speaker 2Yeah, there's a lot of slippery slopes you have to go down to get enough. There's some stuff that's like flat earth. Right, there's just a lot of science out there. This is going to shut that argument down. So you really have to like hold on to a couple of different things. Like I can only see a flat earth. You know like if there was a round earth, this would happen. But you know, like the all the science in the world says like this is the reason why the sun?
Speaker 2rises and sets and all that stuff. So some of the theories are really like based on, like an illogical rationale for some piece that like correct, you take and you like magnify and others are are. I mean there's just not enough.
Speaker 1What's yours okay?
Speaker 2I'm like, I'm with rogan on this one.
Speaker 2uh, it's, it's really the pyramids, and I don't know if it's aliens or like Graham Hancock's early civilization that kind of got wiped out by the first asteroid back in the younger, driest impact theory, or there's some like ancient understanding of like how to manipulate matter that maybe we don't, we never figured out, because we always went the direction of like a specific type of learning and we kind of like anybody who had an like intuitive or like or ability to kind of maybe be on it in a different direction, like those people were kind of, you know, killed or or you know there were witches, right, they were burned, burned the stake.
Speaker 3Or, like you know they were witches, right, they were burned, burned to the stake, or like you know. So they were dead heretics, or whatever she's a witch but I mean so.
Speaker 2I mean I just I leave it open that, like you know, and nothing like I'm not saying like Egyptians couldn't have done it, like I just think it's the the opportunity there for like maybe those were partially there from like 10 000 years ago. The egyptians kind of like took them and like rebuilt.
Speaker 1Have you ever seen them in real life?
Speaker 2no, yeah no, but I've watched a lot of. I've watched a lot of documentaries and listened to the lidar stuff. That would change.
Speaker 3The lidar stuff is really interesting because now they can see deeper and they're like there's yeah, there's so much more than they even like a mile deep in some of these places of like different tunnels and different rooms that were never discovered or have been. My big thing with conspiracy stuff is, let's just say it's purely mathematical. We've realized how expanding and how humongous the universe is.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 3And you're saying that there's nothing other than us. Yeah, trillions and billions and gazillions of numbers we don't even think of, and it's just us.
Speaker 2We're the only ones.
Speaker 3I'm like just the likelihood of that being true is laughable. Now that doesn't mean we can get to them, or we can see them, or maybe they're another. Whatever, I'm just saying the opportunity for that to be true math's on our side.
Speaker 1Well, what's funny is that's less of a conspiracy theory anymore. I mean, it seems like that's now just understood. It's like these are real and that people are coming out to say it's not just a crazy person that came out and said this, or that it's realistic that not only this, but they're talking about aliens actually teaching a certain technology at certain times too. I mean they're there's like a whole other sect, that's like deeper, where they're teaching us their technology, and that's what area 51 was that's what those different things are.
Speaker 1So for me I'm like, yeah, that's, that's a logical thing. Here's where I go with this boys, because I'm always going to go the religious side, because I grew up Christian, I believe I'm with you guys both. I believe that there had to be something greater, technology wise I don't know if it's aliens. I think that we can't get past what the reality of what a thousand years looks like, thousand years from now, like we can't get our minds around those chunks of time that 10 000 years ago or whenever they say the, the egyptian pyramids were made. We can't get past the fact that they might have had technology that we don't understand 10 000 years from now. Here we assume it's like having a computer in our pockets, that's what we assume like that's technology. But in reality there's probably times, there's, there's spaces of time where there were such advanced technologies that we have no comprehension of understanding. But because of the of the course of time that happens, civilizations, natural, natural disasters that happen, those things will go away and then we bring up and raise ourselves up from where we, where we are now, after losing everything to becoming this. So I'm not saying that there were iPhones, yeah, when the pyramids were there, because I think it's a different type of technology.
Speaker 1So there's a story in the Bible and Genesis it's called the tower of Babel is that this group of people got so full of themselves, so powerful, so big, that they built. They decided to build a building because they thought they were God and they were going to get up close enough because they feel like they could touch God. So they built these buildings. They built this building, the tower, as high as possible that they could do. I mean, based on what the new technology says, the pyramids could potentially be that right, like the fact that they go way deeper than they say and all this sand is buried in it, whatever.
Religious Beliefs & Spiritual Journey
Speaker 1I'm just saying that there are stories like this and that, because of their arrogance, god gave them multiple different languages and they were cast beyond where they're at. So that was the idea of why we have all these different languages all over the world that God cast them into understanding different languages, and so they got in these groups like, oh, I understand what you're saying, so we're gonna go now, we just going to go off and do our own thing, and that's how the nations were created. This is 10,000, 15,000 years ago. I don't know, I mean so. The concept of time is insane to even think about beyond 15 years ago I had hair and now I don't like. That's where my mind is. I can't even imagine what it was like without electricity.
Speaker 2Right, and that was 250 years ago.
Speaker 1Yeah, so like time is so different and when we talk about, and then when you're talking about millions and billions of years, like that's even crazier to even think like. Well, what does that even mean? It means nothing to me. Talking about infinite amount of time, infinite amount of galaxies Like my tiny little brain is not going to understand that. But there is a story that gives us kind of a glimpse of what we knew and understood in technology and then it was all taken away and lost Because we all knew everybody was speaking the same language, everybody was in this space, and then all of a sudden it's different well, you know, if you, if you assume that everything has to follow the rules of like modern-day, somewhat modern-day science, understands right, then that that informs the way we have to look at history.
Speaker 2if you, if you believe there's a, you know a God, and and that and God has the ability to, to do and assert his will in different ways, specifically back in times where people needed much more guidance, maybe, although, I think we need a lot of guidance right now.
Speaker 1I mean, now it seems like he's probably using the people around him just like. Well, let's just see what happens. People have free will. I mean, I don't know if I've ever asked you, Bart. You believe that there is a God, right, I do not.
Speaker 2You don't.
Speaker 1We've never asked that you didn't grasp that information from our conversation. Would you consider yourself an atheist or agnostic? Agnostic, so you do believe there's a higher power.
Speaker 2I believe that I don't know, and so I'm willing to. I leave space to one day experience or believe that, but at this point, no Wow that's cool.
Speaker 1I don't think I've ever met a true atheist.
Speaker 2Really no Well agnostic. Well, I mean, you're literally saying that you don't believe anything, but there could be, it's kind of like that extra like well, you know, maybe I mean I just I mean everything in my belief system and what I've experienced in my life and you know I've definitely grew up with like science and physics and math and those types of things and like how those inform my understanding of the world and the universe. But no, I don't.
Speaker 1Do you just not care about all the religious stuff?
Speaker 2No, no, no, this is good. Do I not care? No, no, no, I didn't ask the question yet I didn't ask the question. What?
Speaker 1I'm saying is, when I talk about God, I mean it's pretty obvious when you're annoyed by me.
Speaker 2You don't seem that annoyed. I don't.
Speaker 1Like when I talk about Jesus and God and stuff I lived in a Muslim village for two years. Yeah.
Speaker 2Every single day. Everyone who adored me and was happy I was here wanted me to marry a village girl and they were going to give me a bunch of goats and they were going to like and I could be a.
Speaker 2Muslim and then I would go to heaven and they all wanted me to go to heaven, yeah, and I thought it was such a powerful, you know invitation to be a part of their community and I thought it was beautiful that that was what they asked of me and wanted for me. I've come to America from that experience and had many people ask me to.
Speaker 1Like me, Like you. They're like hey, I want you to go to heaven, let's go.
Speaker 2What I interpreted by it is like you, love me.
Speaker 3You want me to be?
Speaker 2saved. You want me to go to heaven. I don't take as much. I take it seriously that you want that for me, just like I took it seriously that the Jajubine Gandiga families wanted that of me too.
Speaker 1Beautiful. I love that.
Speaker 2But I have not chosen to take that that's why I love you, bro.
Speaker 1I love you, man, and don't worry, I got you.
Speaker 2Deep thoughts.
Speaker 3So we got from conspiracy theory to that.
Speaker 2This is why, I freaking love this this is what happens. All right, let's move on.
Speaker 3We got we can keep going on that and that could get real deep. Oh yeah, by the way, if you ever want to look up something funny, that's great. Pete Holmes has a really great clip and I can I can send it to you guys about atheists, agnostics and and.
Speaker 1I've seen that clip. It's good and it's really funny.
Speaker 3It's good because he's like wait, so you're saying something you can't see feel hear or touch yeah you think it's nothing. So what happens when you die? You just merge into nothing. You mean go back to your creator and he goes, that's heaven bitch.
Speaker 1It's like the funniest.
Speaker 3You know what's funny is, I think, been he is a spiritualist, I mean, his favorite teacher is father richard rohr oh yeah and like but he just I mean I think I saw him on the george janko show talking about we're making bart uncomfortable.
Speaker 1It's okay, let's move on. Let's talk about the top three movies. I'm actually not uncomfortable.
Speaker 2This is, I think, what people are concerned about that. I, I feel okay I just I worry that you didn't know this until now that like that, we were talking about how close of friends we were and yet you did not I mean, it was just a moment of life, you didn't know.
Speaker 3Art was going to hell. Don't worry about it. It's okay. You're gonna burn in the fiery pit I don't know.
Speaker 2It's known for years.
Speaker 1No, here's here's the funny thing about it, I think uh, you exude all of the attributes of a believer. Now, I knew you didn't buy into what I believe. That's fine, but I didn't know that part. That's a different level and that's okay because I love you. But also I'm surprised that I didn't notice. But also, if it's not about me, I don't really talk about it.
Speaker 2Well, I think there's also like, when you ask that directive question, you're really putting somebody on the spot to like say I do or I don't. So I think that would make sense to not necessarily like that, wouldn't just like, yeah, passing conferences. I don't think you're that black and white, you know there's fruit in your life. That is no.
Speaker 3I call this spiritual stretching, whether you do believe like this. One thing is my thing about spirituality. We talk about it like this. You can be like I don't know, but maybe there's something, but I'm open to it. I'm definitely one thing I, the people I trust the most that are not followers of Jesus their ability to say yeah, I don't have it figured out. And I'm kind of surprised if anybody's like I don't have it figured out and I'm kind of surprised if anybody's like I know exactly what happens.
Speaker 2blah, blah, blah. That's one of the more arrogant things that might be a psychopath.
Speaker 1That's the Tower of Babel mindset right. I don't know for sure, but I know what I've experienced Well that's how cults get created.
Speaker 3Some very charismatic yoga instructor with abs, and then he's like after six months, he's like after six months. He's like by the way, I'm no sex with everybody you have to really see.
Speaker 1I okay, hear me out I think that those types of cults like that's true dedication, that's like there's no religion of any sort, there's no cult that could make me go yep, my wife is now your wife and I no longer have any power. That would be that's true faith, right there, I think.
Speaker 2That's true. That's the power of manipulation and control. When a cult leader gets that much power and that much control over a group of people, it's amazing that that can happen. But it's also very telling, if you look at history, that that happens over and over and over, sometimes in a small cult setting, other times in an entire yeah, country or you know mindset of people okay, so hear me out all right, we gotta spin.
Speaker 1Okay, we're gonna stay on topic the the the side of all the different cult leaders and all the different religions, there's only one religion, there's only one ideology that the leader never requires anything of us, it just gives. I give this to you in sacrifice because I love you.
Speaker 2Islam.
Speaker 1And that's what Jesus was.
Speaker 2Oh.
Speaker 1No, islam requires a ton of stuff.
Speaker 2man there's a lot of stuff, man, I know there's a lot of stuff.
Speaker 1But I love you and we can move on Because I love you, and we can cut this out too, it's fine.
Speaker 2No, do not cut this out. Nobody's cutting this out, so.
Speaker 3Jesus is a conspiracy. That's what you're saying. Let me just wrap it up, we're. Let me just wrap it up, we ended up with Jesus.
Celebrating Marriage Anniversaries
Speaker 1Edit it, that was a hoax. All right, I spin this in. Here we go. I can believe in Zen right there, all right this seems like a fairly easy one to tackle.
Speaker 2I just celebrated, you know, and us, we could go down a rabbit hole.
Speaker 1I just celebrated 18 years anniversary right after our powerlifting competition with my wife and I genuinely felt a lot of pressure of like what do I do?
Speaker 2I really had to make it special. I hadn't like, got her anything, but also like you didn't tell her that the 1100 pounds you lifted was for her.
Speaker 1You go. I did this for you. Here's my medal. All right, how?
Speaker 2many years are you married? Eight, almost 18, almost 18, me almost 18 also 2006 right 2006 2007 june, then I'm almost 19.
Speaker 1Sorry, you're almost 19 no, I'm almost 18.
Speaker 2I'm october 27th, so okay yeah, so I.
Speaker 1We were looking back at pictures and obviously with kids and that type of thing it changes over time but really thoughtful ideas to how to celebrate especially somebody that you've been with that long. Because it's easy to say we've been married a long time, it's OK, like oh, don't worry about it, oh, whatever, but there's still that spark of like you need to do something.
Speaker 3Thoughtless is not an option, so thoughtful does not necessarily mean a lot of money or even a lot of time. If you are thoughtful and if it to my wife I mean Christina's like if it took some forethought and it was planned and or a curated experience it means that I thought about this and I wanted to celebrate what the real reason is. It doesn't necessarily have to be like surprise pack your bags. Here's a silk robe or I don't know whatever.
Speaker 2And I just thought, yeah, it doesn't have to be something that on the nose.
Speaker 3Also, you got to know your spouse. What really means a lot to her. If it's something that she's mentioned and she hasn't gotten it, it's a little gift and it's really cute and fun and we have a special night or get somebody to take care of the kids for one night and we go have a staycation somewhere. That's $200. It doesn't mean this big old thing.
Speaker 2It's honing in on what your spouse, what the relationship, really long longs for and like what's really going to celebrate the the moment? Not not what it, what it was 18 years ago or 10 years ago. Or like, hey, let's do what we did on you know, five years ago, cause that was so fun, but like what, what feels right for today?
Speaker 3Yeah, and if you make it all about her, that's good, but I think that's kind of like one-sided If you make it about your relationship the place where your relationship is thirsty and you water that.
Speaker 2I think that's kind of cool, because it means it's not just for her.
Speaker 3It's like oh, I know you like this one piece of jewelry. Well, that's not for you. That has nothing to do with your marriage. You're just trying to be nice, but if it's something that actually curates an experience for you all together, that actually builds the marriage up. I think that's better.
Speaker 2I like that. Experiential is always the way to go. I mean we're possible, but creating some experience that you two are going to remember and just allows you to truly celebrate each other.
Speaker 3I got the reservation, I got everything ready. It's already planned. She doesn't have to plan anything and you let her know what we're doing. It's thoughtful.
Speaker 2I think it's cool, but it also shows you can do all those things and it could be a hunting trip, which is what you like and she's like. Why are we doing this?
Speaker 3You're like. Well, I thought we'd enjoy doing the thing that I love.
Speaker 1You don't love golf too. You've never played before.
Speaker 2I forgot about that. Right, let's go to a baseball game. We're going to go watch LeBron James play basketball. We're going to play three rounds with my best friends.
Speaker 3And then that night we get to do a dinner together. We're going to have cake stands.
Speaker 1I'll invite you to the studio.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1I think that's a really good point. So how did you do?
Speaker 2I mean, I don't know you feel like you knocked it out of the park. I don't know. I feel you had an experiential. You went to Black Keys.
Speaker 1We went to the Black Keys. I mean, it was after the powerlifting thing. I got a band yeah.
Speaker 3Is that a location?
Speaker 1that I don't know.
Speaker 2No, the Florida Keys. We went to the Black Keys, I'm like whoa, keep it easy.
Speaker 1It's called Florida Keys, so we went to a Black Keys concert that was at Moody Amphitheater and I got a hotel that was just like we could walk there from there and I what were the kids doing? The kids were with my sister-in-law, Leslie. She tends to be that person.
Speaker 2Shout out to Leslie for taking care of the kids. She, she tends to be that person.
Speaker 1Shout out to Leslie for taking care of the kids. She's always been that person. They love her. But because you know, ultimately I think what I'm starting to feel is I want to involve the kids more. That's it Like doing stuff together is kind of Stacy's love language. So we've been away with them.
Speaker 1Acts of services or things with them. Acts of services or things so like if we go somewhere and I'm like, oh, the kids are staying with less, or you know, her parents, um, and it's just us. It's like, oh, they would really like this, and the whole time it's like, oh, the kids would really have a good time. I mean, the Black Keys was obviously like this was for us and we're having a good time and we stayed, we chilled by the pool for the majority of the afternoon and then walked over there.
Speaker 1But like now it's getting to the point where it's like kind of miss our kids, where it's like, hey, we want to go skiing or we want to do those things. So I'm I'm trying to figure out ultimately what that looks like, because it's it feels like as a middle-aged man now it's like we should do big trips and like let's go to Europe for our anniversary and let's do those things. But now? But if you don't do that every time, then you're kind of like well, let's just go to the Plague Keys concert, which you wanted to go anyway and you bought tickets. I'll build something around it.
Speaker 2I don't know. I feel like I failed.
Speaker 1I didn't get her anything this year. I've never, like never done that. I just genuinely couldn't think of anything and I was like if I just buy her something, it'd be stupid. Yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah, I think it's all intentional. I feel like a failure. Yeah, I don't think. No, don't feel that way.
Speaker 1Thanks, Brett.
Speaker 2No, it's intentionality.
Speaker 3If you didn't mention it at all, I'd be like ugh. Yeah, but if you mentioned it and you said, hey, I really want to spend some extra time together. I mean, dude, it really is not about the gift.
Speaker 1It really is about the intentionality. I mean she worked our actual anniversary.
Speaker 3Oh, here's a question Are you guys like a day of celebrator person?
Speaker 2I am, or are you like?
Speaker 3around it to make sense Like Valentine's night. Around it to make sense Like Valentine's night.
Speaker 2I've never done it. I've always done it before or around it, but this is more fun, yeah whatever works.
Speaker 3Yeah, it's expensive and weird yeah all right.
Speaker 2I think what we tend to do is the 27th is kinda like seems to float between like Thursday and Sunday, and so sometimes it's weekend, that's easy. But if it's like weekday and it's school and there's like what's your anniversary? Day uh 27 of what of october, oh okay, so it's usually a beautiful time in austin, so that's the other thing it's like so but we'll.
Speaker 2We'll try to do a dinner on our birthday. If it's a weekday, then we'll do an early one, like 4, 45 or 5, so that jack can be included and all that um, but then the celebration would probably be on the weekend, december 15th is ours. So right.
Speaker 3So schools wrapping up our youngest son.
Speaker 1Christmas for those of us who celebrate it. Oh, that's a natural holiday where we celebrate.
Speaker 3Jesus's birth.
Speaker 2We can talk about it later. It's fine. Who wants to spin? No, we, uh. Do you spell Jesus? Um, so we do you spell Jesus X?
Speaker 3mess? Um, so we do. My youngest son is December 4th birthday and it's our anniversary, and then it's Christmas and it's new year, so it's like it kind of gets lost in the sauce a little bit. So we have to try to be pretty intentional just for one day, but we also don't make a big deal of it.
Speaker 2I don't know that's my other thing I think if a lot's going well, like with the way your res are, you know doing things like you, you can kind of like find a sweet, a sweet moment to kind of celebrate it without having to make it so grandiose Sometimes the grandiose is actually an overcompensation of like what do they say, those angry?
Speaker 1people that go on with. Like the birthday Stacy and I both didn't post about our anniversary on instagram or like whatever, because it's just like well, that's not that big a deal, because a lot of the times, most of those people that are like going on about my amazing this and amazing that ultimately it's somebody that's neglecting the relationship not always, but like the majority of times, it is like or if you make fun of your, your spouse, in the anniversary post that was a lot for my birthday.
Speaker 1She posted, uh the day after my birthday. This is how she is. Uh, just pictures of me asleep.
Speaker 2I mean like six or seven photos of me falling asleep with my shirt off, which is all we really want is to like, have a day off, like, what do you want to do on your father's day? Sleep in work out eat food, watch a movie. I have nothing to do.
Speaker 1I mean, I definitely hear you on that because I think it is a case by case basis. If you were going to ask me what I felt like 18 years of marriage would look like, it would definitely not look this way. Not that I'm upset about that. I just had in my mind that I feel like I'd be older or more mature or better off, like. There's just a weird like yeah, I don't know it's 18 years.
Speaker 3I thought I was gonna be way older than 18 years old 22 year old mitch.
Speaker 1Hey, what does 18 years of marriage looks like? I'd be like well old and this and we're probably, you know, just like going on a cruise, I don't know like doing old people's stuff. Yeah, I do an old knitting I don't know.
Speaker 2That's also the an experience of like youth, where you just like 18 years is like your entire life because you're 21, 22, you're like, that's basically. I was three 18 years ago, so I must be an old man, like walking, you know, like it's so long from now.
Speaker 3Yeah you just thought you'd pay her in Werther's originals. I thought you'd be dead by now. Honey bear, I made you this rocking chair that's what 40 looked like.
Speaker 1I mean I'm 40, you guys are obviously in your 60s, but like when 66.
Speaker 3That's a biblical number like that. Write that down.
Speaker 1Bart felt it. They know that that is, I agree. I think that ultimately you got it. There's not a set design like you have to do this or that, but you have to do something.
Closing Thoughts & Part One Preview
Speaker 2Quick, quick transition story, because we're back to the spin here. That was way too long of a conversation for this, but I'm all good with it. It's awesome stuff. So in college my buddy Andrew and I were paid to be soloists at a church, so every Sunday we'd go.
Speaker 1We're going back to the God thing.
Speaker 2Yeah, let's go I would sing these very biblical passages operatic baritone style and like come my way, my love, my heart like all this like uh, rafe Vaughn Williams like you know, and, and everyone would be like oh you, just it's good to see you.
Speaker 3I feel God's love through you.
Speaker 2I'm so glad to hear that.
Speaker 1I can't wait to hear this song in heaven sung by you. I felt like such a fraud.
Speaker 2One time I got called to do a Christian science church.
Speaker 1It was the weirdest thing Scientology, no, christian science.
Speaker 3That's the same thing, right.
Speaker 2No, it's not, it's not.
Speaker 3Totally different. I think the church's Scientology is different than Christian science.
Speaker 2There was a massive auditorium in LA, like in Hollywood, and there would be like nine people in the first three rows. And there's, like church, the head priest, pastor, whatever would be wearing like Sultan, the grand vizier, he would be wearing like a suit of a used car salesman, like three-piece, like all the like.
Speaker 2You know, just kind of like it's a used car salesman, like three piece, like all the like. You know just kind of like it's a little too big for him. But you know, like still try to look good. And then I would go up there and I'd be like, oh, you know, like do some song. And then, like it was like the old lady clapping.
Speaker 3And the acoustics are like amazing on there, but at the same time it's like this is empty. Did you get paid for that?
Speaker 2Oh, yeah, More than any other church. They paid $150 for a song Wait wait, Christian science.
Speaker 3They're like Jesus and biology.
Speaker 2Yeah, they don't believe that science. That's their theme song. Christian beliefs will heal you and you shouldn't go to the doctor.
Speaker 1You shouldn't seek healing.
Speaker 2And people would die because they were smart.
Speaker 1Yeah, because they're idiots. You sound like an atheist.
Speaker 2You're idiots. How dare you believe in God?
Speaker 1No to the point of like, hey, I have asthma, so it's like, yeah, well, let's just trust God to heal my asthma.
Speaker 2It's like, no, just let's just trust God to heal my asthma, let's pray more.
Speaker 1It's like no, just use albuterol. That was created by man, that God created Idiots, Anyway. I don't have an opinion about that at all.
Speaker 3God can heal people still.
Speaker 1I agree If it's in the Bible, I think it's real.
Speaker 3But it is wise to not put dirt in your wounds either.
Speaker 2So it's not like, doesn't heal me I'm gonna deal with.
Speaker 3Uh, okay, I'm gonna go to. I'm spingerman button. Wait, hold on, behold, before we go into.
Speaker 1This might have to be a part two of brit are we already out of time?
Speaker 3I?
Speaker 1mean it would be good to probably close it out and split it up and go into the next one.
Speaker 2We've hit some really solid, deep core issues. Everyone on the podcast now knows that I am not a believer in God and therefore feel free to just send me hate mail or whatever you'd like.
Speaker 3No don't bar.
Speaker 1We love you. You said you don't know.
Speaker 2I am waiting for some sort. It's interesting I was in Kauai at the Nepali coastline, colau, sitting there watching sunset. I'd hiked 11 miles in, I sat there and I was just kind of like not meditating but just taking in the sunset and I came overwhelmed by this feeling of like connection and like like purpose and peace and and I thought this might be God, yeah, Right. And then it just went away and I never felt it again and I'm like maybe I need to go back to coal now.
Speaker 1No, I mean that's a great.
Speaker 2Or maybe it was the mango I ate on the tree, maybe it was the gas you felt.
Speaker 1No, I, bart. I love your openness about this. I'm sorry to put you on the spot love your openness about this.
Speaker 2I'm sorry to put you on the spot like that. Was it surprised me?
Speaker 1I think everyone listens to this surmise that that was my answer, except no, I. I think this is the best part about who god is and who christ is for us is he meets you where you're at. There's uh, there's a in the scripture. There's revelation 320. I remember it from a kid. Christ says behold, I stand at the door and knock. He is pursuing us and you're going to find, at whatever intersection that is and whatever that looks like in your time and what Christ wants for you.
Speaker 1So I love your openness, I love you, dude, and ultimately, I think that there's probably a lot of people that feel the same way you do, and I always earn it in a place where I feel like I've intersected God at certain spots in my life and it really does matter those points where you can go hey, this is the point where that intersection happened. Things aren't always great. Yeah, you know, things aren't always perfect, loss happens, those types of things but I think it's a good reminder that, in our space, that the openness to which we have is going to allow whatever that is to come in. For me, it's christ, yeah, you know so I love you, man.
Speaker 2We're gonna change the podcast name to the pastor and the dad bod and the dumbbell I mean, I can't take, you can't take the pastor out of me, man.
Speaker 1Well, thank you guys. So much for listening. Part one, yeah, part one, part two rolling up. We're actually going to be fun and we're actually can't leave.
Speaker 2We've locked the door from the outside.
Speaker 3He's not allowed to leave. We're going to spend some more roads.
Speaker 2So let's stay tuned for next week with the thanks so much for listening.
Speaker 1Next week you'll see part two with Britt, Bart and Mitch. Dad, bods and dumbbells have a great day.