The Dad Bods and Dumbbells Podcast

Bart Challenges Mitch to go All In as a Powerlifter and things get Deep!!

• Barton Bryan and Mitch Royer • Season 1 • Episode 75

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We trade jokes for honesty and talk about aging, injury, and the fear of being average, then land on a challenge: pick one thing and be undeniable. Adult competition, powerlifting vs marathons, and real talk about identity turn a casual catch-up into a turning point.

• sponsor shoutouts and premium member thanks
• health updates: knees, hamstring, cold plunge, cleats
• youth feedback on aging skills and passing
• camaraderie, community, and competing after 40
• effort vs injury risk and league fit
• pick one discipline and pursue it deeply
• the case for powerlifting focus over endurance overlap
• identity, people-pleasing, and fear of failure
• practical training trade-offs and recovery
• quick college football takes and ticket offer

“Thank you so much for listening, liking, subscribing, and sharing” 
“Three tickets, section 103—listeners get first dibs”


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SPEAKER_01:

Welcome to Dad Bods and Dumbbells. My name is Mitch.

SPEAKER_04:

Hey, I'm Bart.

SPEAKER_01:

Thanks so much for listening, liking, subscribing, and sharing. We love you guys. Our loyal listeners. You know, but anybody new, we're talking about Solutions Pharmacy. If you are losing your hair, if you have any issues, they're discreet, they're good, we love them. Uh, get a little semaglutide, a little GPL1, a little revertutide, potentially, we'll see. Just make sure you check out Solutions Pharmacy first because you're gonna love them. Great customer service they deliver to your door. Thank you, Solutions Pharmacy. If you are not already a premium member of our podcast, you definitely need to be. Thank you to all our premium members, our newest members. Thank you guys for joining. We appreciate you guys. It supports the podcast, keeps us doing what we're doing so that we can continue to bring great content. We love you. Thanks so much. On today's show, hey, real quick.

SPEAKER_04:

Um, I do want to like we we talked about the the new subscribers. Hey, Joey, Ben, and Gregor. I mean, you guys, thank you so much. I just we I I feel like it's important to shout out to shout out. My bad. Uh so yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Bart sees that information, just know that I'm yeah, and it gets it gets emailed to me.

SPEAKER_04:

So Joey, Ben, Gregor, you you you we see you, we appreciate you. Love you.

SPEAKER_01:

Thank you. Thank you. Uh to anybody that has already subscribed that we haven't shout out, just send Bart a nasty email because that's how it is. You know, just do it. Uh, on today's show, we have a special, special edition. It is a me and Bart discussing all the things that we're dealing with health-wise, which I'm dealing with a ton of stuff. Can't wait to hear about your issues. We've held off talking about it personally for this podcast. Extra special, but also uh Oregon and Indiana. Oof, God. It was a tough, tough game.

unknown:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm so thankful that I'm an uh Indiana alumni and I can say go Hoosiers. I feel like we should stop real quick. Hold on.

SPEAKER_04:

I think everyone is wondering if your knee is blown out yet. Because you just mentioned health. Uh, just I'm sitting here with him. He's got really high shorts on. I feel a lot of leg.

SPEAKER_03:

Um I saw a testicle.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, I might have my testicle might have popped out of my shorts. Um both knees, a little scraped up on the right side, but but there is no ACL terror to be. I didn't even have a brace on. No brace on. So if you if you were one of them that vetted it was gonna be in the first couple weeks, unfortunately, he has lasted longer than expected. The knee pool. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

So my son has come to both games the last two games, and he is my son is a uh he's in a travel league, he's in a club league. He's my son is an excellent soccer player at 10 years old, right? He is uh, I go, what did you think? Like, give me some feedback. It was not good. Like genuinely, if you want to ever have your ego like hit where I was like, I thought I played really great last week, where I'm like, man, I was controlling the ball, I was moving the ball around, I was like dead. Are you trying to run like that? You're so stupid. He goes, he did say, you know, I'm a defender, I've always been a defender, but because the way that our league is, there's a lot of old guys. Old guys in the sense of I'm probably the oldest, you know, but they're lazy when it when they get tired, and I run, I ran four miles the day before that morning, so I'm used to running that type of thing. Now I'm not used to the back and forth and the sprinting and that type of thing, which is a good thing for me. But uh I'm like, I see the open, I gotta run for it. But the problem that I have is what my son told me was I had some dink passes that didn't, you know, get there. That's bad. But I was like, did you see that amazing like stop I did defensively? I ran back, I covered, I didn't come, I didn't, you know, I didn't um stab. I I was I'm a great defender, you know. I was all state academic in the NIL NL NIL.

SPEAKER_04:

I hope you didn't tell your son that.

SPEAKER_01:

Um I was all I was all academic all state, you know, my junior year. So um anyway, I'm more of a defender than I am an offender because honestly, I'm learning that if I don't stay back like midfield, they tend I'll do give and goes a bunch. I'm good for the give. When I go, I can't. If the if you hit the ball at my feet or ahead of me, like I panic. I cannot, I'm not a great ball.

SPEAKER_04:

And you're uh let me guess, your your son is a forward.

SPEAKER_01:

My son's a winger, so he handles the ball really well. He'll make it a little bit.

SPEAKER_04:

So he he watches you fumble the passing towards the goal, and he's just shakes.

SPEAKER_01:

One time I crossed the ball and nobody was there, you know, like a really great kick, but genuinely I was like, I thought somebody would be there, and it was genuinely just an open field. So uh all that to say, yeah, there's some dinks and things. I the last couple weeks I've been dealing with a hamstring and my knees have been hurting because there's there have been a few tweaks. It has set me back with my running because I'm training for I signed up for the San Antonio marathon in December, and I'm doing Austin Marathon where I'm breaking the Guinness World Record for fastest um marathon dressed as a book in February, and I've been upping my mileage, and I'll come, you know, on two, it's Tuesday nights when we play, I'll come out Wednesday morning, and I literally cannot get warmed up enough to where there's not horrible pain in my knee. That was last week. So this week I was like, listen, if it sets me back anymore, I am freaking done. I'm not playing anymore. This is the fifth week we've done it. Um, but this week I woke up this morning and I was like, I feel good, man. I'm my body's getting used to it, it's recovering well. And uh, you know, of course, contrast therapy hurts, uh helps.

SPEAKER_04:

You're gonna look cold plunging at the time.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, a little cold plunge with Havex Wellness. Thank you, Havex Wellness. Shout out to Havex. Havex Wellness, uh portable ice bath I have in my garage. So it does help, but uh no blown ACLs. I I thought I popped my Achilles at one point. I'm okay. Don't worry about it. Um, I probably need to get better soccer cleats.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, this this is great news for all of us who are worried about.

SPEAKER_01:

How much money did uh Ryan lose?

SPEAKER_04:

Ryan only only did a gentleman's bet, which was the right play. Um okay, so that that's good. That's a good update there. Um yeah, man. I mean how are you doing physically? Um good. Well, let's go. We'll go into like overall healthy in a little bit here. Uh but uh let's do our college football minute.

SPEAKER_01:

Before we talk about any more, you just wanted to hear if I No, I think that I knew that people would be thinking about your ACL. I wanted that to be at least all you haters out there, you can suck it. Yeah, Mitch is stronger than we thought. Baby.

SPEAKER_04:

I'll be honest, I thought today was the day he was gonna walk in on crutches. I'd be done. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

No, actually, I feel better than ever. And honestly, I'm learning my my abilities and my limitations. And also, here's here's the most underrated thing. I think a lot of people, similar to me, don't compete after high school. Yeah, yeah, they might have played sports in high school where they're competing, but being a grown-ass man and competing against other grown-ass men, it there's something to be said for the camaraderie that's built. And the for me, I think the confidence, because it's intimidating going out to a field going, I don't know what level these people are at. Maybe I won't be good enough. And to be able to compete and to be have a good time, whether you get beat or you don't, I I think is really cool. I last week I I almost got into a fight inside. Yeah, I get super competitive, but I'm learning to really like enjoy the competitive side of you gotta compete because if you don't, you lose that sense of fight. And I I think there's confidence behind that. You can come home and yeah, you're icing your knees or whatever, and you can go, well, I'm not what I once was. Of course you're not, but that's why I love races. It's the one opportunity you have to go to a race, to sit there and only compete against yourself. But there's something to be said of doing something just like when you were doing pickup basketball. It's like getting back to competing against other men. It it's it builds camaraderie, it builds confidence, it's community, and it's what we're meant to do. So that's been the big takeaway for me. Where I say, no matter if we win or lose, no matter if I feel bad or not, I tell the guy who's put it all together, I say thank you.

SPEAKER_04:

Just to be able to and it's always gonna be risk-reward. Like, you know, the reward is exactly what you're talking about being able to feel that excitement of competing again, being around other men, that you know, sharing that camaraderie of sport and competition and all that. The risk is obviously the injuries and and and what that might do to set you back in other aspects of your life where you know your wife would love for you to not be hobbling around on crutches. Yeah. And so you gotta play that out. And that that's what I learned. You know, I joined a basketball league about a year two years ago, and I was enjoying the heck out of it, doing a lot of you know, prep with the team to like, but then all of a sudden my plantar fasciitis flared up. I mean, I really didn't have plantar fasciitis because whatever.

SPEAKER_01:

Plantar fasciis, it is the worst.

SPEAKER_04:

And it's it's I mean, running, yes, but more like the deceleration off a jump. So it wouldn't hurt jumping into it like up to make a layup, but coming back down, that like where the the the plantar tendon has to like decelerate the foot, it would just like it with like ice picks in my feet. Anyway, so I I played one game and then just like retired. So it was so frustrating. But uh, but yeah, I mean it's just one of those things where yeah, you know, if your body says yes, go for it. I'm on my I love and I think there's other ways to compete too. I mean, we competed in a powerlifting show. Oh that's an individual competition. Um our boy uh Ryan is competing in the Ryan with an A is competing in a bodybuilding show in a couple weeks. Ryan with an O is competing has competes as a as a bite, a cyclist. So I mean I think if you especially if you're an athlete or love to do that type of thing, find your vehicle for doing it. Um but yeah, I mean sometimes like the thing that we are the best at in high school might be the thing we like that's what I learned. I can compete in anything else, I feel fine. But it's like if I compete in the thing that I was the best at when I was 18 years old, that's where because I have all these instincts to like cut and like I've got all these moves that I wanna to do, and then that's where my foot's like, nah, you don't want to do that.

SPEAKER_01:

Being athletic and being an athlete and then going into other things and being going, good, I can I can play beach volleyball and look at it and be like, hey, that wasn't bad. But when it's soccer is tough, that is a good way to put it. I struggle with understanding, like, just like I did when I was in high school or college playing soccer, was like, I in my mind I'm better and I want to be what I was, and that's just not possible. So finding that balance because ultimately I don't want to get injured, yes, but also I don't want to be limited by here here's the the hard thing to watch is anybody that comes and plays, they're all at different levels of athleticism. But some of those people that play, that's the only physical activity they will do all week.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, that is that's more problematic.

SPEAKER_01:

That's a problem because we sit here and go, I can sit here and go, I can run as long as you want me to run. Because I know I can run, but the fact is, most of those people they're huffing and puffing or wheezing and going, you know, what you know, I used to do this or I was trying to do this, and maybe there's some bright shining pieces of like, wow, that was a great shot or a great touch or whatever. But ultimately, I love the ability to be able to like, oh, we kicked a ball out of bounds, I'm gonna go run and grab it and come back and it not be a detriment to our team, you know.

SPEAKER_04:

And the other thing that I think factors in is if you're competing, if you're in a league with other men your age, that helps. Yes. Like I was a I was putting myself in a league with a whole bunch of young guys. Oh, dude. And and then, yeah, and so that was that was that was another aspect of it too. If I put myself in like a 45 to 50, you know, guys, like half-court basketball three on three thing, I would that would be so much fun. I could see myself doing that because I I could I could pace myself, I could use my like height and my passing ability, and just pull back from like some of the like more like athletic movements that I used to be able to do that I probably shouldn't do as much of now.

SPEAKER_01:

That is that is a difficult point, but I also think, and this is how I feel a little bit too, is our our league is like 20, you have to be 25 or older. So, yeah, there's obviously kids that are 25 that are playing, and there's some that are my age and whatever, but it is frustrating to play with people that don't have from a competitor set that don't have the energy or effort, not about energy, effort. So I don't care if you suck, I just want to see that you're putting the effort in to run back, play defense, to be so that's what gets me, gets my go a little bit.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, I think that's a that's a soccer specific point of view. Okay, because I will tell you this I would rather have somebody who has no cardiovascular ability but knows where to be on the court in basketball. The worst player to play with is the guy that has no idea how to space and no idea like so they end up like you have the ball, you're trying to get down low, and they're right there. Yeah, they're right. They're standing between you and the basket, and they don't understand that they need to move their ass out of the way. And they just they just kind of end up in the way all the time, and they're almost like the sixth player on the other team. Yeah. Because I hate them and I want to kick them out. We had we had that guy on the team. He was like a he was a trainer, and he like had a lot of you know bravado, and he really tried so hard. He was running all over the place, and he just but he just had no court concept, like he just hadn't played basketball enough to understand where to be, where not to be, how you help the team off the ball. And I just like, please go sit down. Just please go down go sit down.

SPEAKER_01:

We had we had a guy last night, uh, he's awesome. He's energy, he's puts in, he's got a great touch on the ball. He's he's a guy, he just talks too much. Where it's like, hey, over here, over here, go wing, wing, wing, wing, go me, give and go, give and go, give and go. All in the same sentence. Not like those are separate situations. He says that the entire time. And one of the guys on our team was like, bro, stop talking. Because there was like, I had a give and go situation. And a give and go is where they pass the ball to you, it's short, it's short. Yeah, I know what a give and go. Short, they run down the line, you pass it to them in the gap, and then they swing it in, and it's a perfect play. Yeah. Well, he goes, I had the ball, I kick it to him. He goes, give and go, give and go. And I said, perfect. He kicks it to me. He goes, No, no, you go, you go. And I'd already kicked it into space. And so it was like, bro, like, just chill out. Everybody just chill out a little bit.

SPEAKER_04:

So it's almost like an overcompensation for him. Like, you know, when people like it's great when when people talk, yeah, because that's you know, really great teams are high high level communication. But when someone's like over-communicating and you don't need to be. I don't have to say, hey, I'm posting up. Yeah. Let's pass the ball. Let's run a, let's, you know, let's run a play. Like, we don't have to do that. We can just like we can just infer it. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01:

And that's that's how it is with soccer. I mean, that shows experience and conditioning too. Is if he passes me the ball in the middle of the field and I see him on that wing, I know I can I have confidence. Just like when I passed the I crossed the ball to a runner uh across the field. Amazing kick, by the way, but nobody was there. It was like, guys, you gotta run the line, you know, you gotta run down to the post. Yeah, um, but anyway, it's hard, it's hard for me to deal with that.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, and that's why it's so fun when you actually find people that you that play at the same level as you or even sometimes more better than you.

SPEAKER_02:

I like people that are a lot better, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

And that's but that's the problem, is that then you start like it's like you know, I yes, I could play basketball right now against a bunch of people that aren't that good, and I wouldn't have any risk of injury. Yeah. Because I wouldn't have to play that hard. Exactly. And I could kind of play point guard, which I think I should have played in high school. Although I never Who was your coach in high school? No, don't worry about it. Let's shout him at it. No, no, no. I wasn't let's show him. I I didn't do let me be clear, I didn't deserve to play point guard, but when I put myself on a pickup game playing point guard, yeah, and I I don't have no three-point shot, so it's not that I can shoot on the outside, I just have a really good court sense. Yeah, and I'm tall. Usually I'm taller than most people, and I can and I just I have a really good, like quick high pass cutter. I can anticipate.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm actually a really good basketball player. All right.

SPEAKER_04:

Uh like I can't wait to see that. Maybe maybe that should be one of our uh premium members' uh experiences. Come see Mitch and Bart play one-on-one.

SPEAKER_01:

No, I'm not one-on-one. I'm saying I'm a great one.

SPEAKER_04:

You know, we could go over to home court, which is where my son plays hoops, and they do a lot of like there's a lot of like men's basketball like meetups and stuff like that, you know, during the day. We could go to like put a little three-on-three game together.

SPEAKER_01:

I okay, so I think this is really good for anybody listening. Now we're talking about our our sports that we particularly play, but you know, I had the opportunity to go. My brother has this awesome lake house. I don't know if he wants me to tell the world, but he has this great lake house. Can you can you uh share the address? I'll share the address with I'll put in the the show notes. Uh premium member Mark Mark, Dr. Mark. He uh this is an awesome lake house. And my brother has been has become like an amazing wake boarder.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, that's awesome.

SPEAKER_01:

And we've when we were growing up, we didn't really play water sports. It wasn't like we went to the lake. If we did, it was because like we had somebody in our church that was like, hey kids, you should come play, you know, water ski with us or whatever. But I don't think he had ever done it. And he's 42, and I was watching him at the lake house, and he is fit. He he was a runner, he's been a runner, he's probably still is. I run marathons, he's he's has all the athletic ability, but to see him on the water is like dang, this guy is freaking good. And I think there's something to be said, and you challenged me with this when we were working out as powerlifters, there's something to be said as a man in your 40s to do something and be undeniable in it, to just put your full effort into something that you can see yourself succeed. And not only does it help your mental health, it helps your it helps your fitness, it helps your um it helps your confidence. I think that speaks very, very true to the things we're talking about. Is sometimes it's really important for men in our age to just do something. Hey, I love this, so or I'm already naturally inclined to do this, so push and do it. And and it's inspiring, it really is. And even in your 40s, it's like we can do stuff. It's not like we're you're in your 50s, but we can do stuff that we thought we couldn't do. We just have to put the time and work into it, and we have to ice our knees sometimes, you know.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, well, and I I want to challenge you a little bit because I feel like I love it when you challenge. Let's give you honest. You've pushed it. I don't think I think you should quit marathons. If I'm being completely honest, I'm thinking. Yeah, get it out of the way. I don't you don't have to take any of my advice, but here's my honest opinion. Quit marathons. You're wasting your time. You're not built for a marathon, you're built for powerlifting. And you need to go all in for the next five years on powerlifting. Okay. And just you are you are farm strong. You are you are you just go Hoosiers. I mean, yeah, there you go. Now you sold out and run back to the Hoosiers. I've always believed in them. But listen, this is the this is this is the whole thing. I mean, I have spent my life working out in the gym. And you came into this the space to power lift with me. You didn't really take a lot of like coaching from you know from our guy.

SPEAKER_01:

Uh I didn't listen to any of it. You didn't listen.

SPEAKER_04:

I mean, you just kind of did your thing and you just lifted a lot of heavy weight, but you're just you're just it's like you know, your your last name in the power lifting space is Kip Chogi, right? Oh yeah. You know, to use a marathon reference. That's a great reference. You're you're from the Kip you're from the Kip, you know, tribe. Like the all anyone with Kip, whatever, that's a tribe in like Ethiopia, northern Kenya, that like run and live at like 10,000 feet, and they have incredible like genetics and like discipline around it. You you you come from the that's it's like you're just a strong, you're built to be a gladiator, you're built to be to carry a battle axe into battle and and throw you know a big log like a like a Highlander. Like, but you're but somehow you think running marathons is the way to go. And I'm just telling you, you can suffer through those marathons at four hours or whatever it takes you, but you did one powerlifting show, you lifted like 1240 pounds. What was the number? I think 1240. Yeah, I mean, and without any real technique or or anything. Imagine if you put a year into it, got a real coach, and like, and and really like devoted, because every time you go run, you're wasting energy. You're wasting your body's ability to recover, your nervous system's getting fatigued. Yeah, so one of the reasons why power lifters are so big and strong is because they don't do cardio, they don't waste their energy doing cardio, they just pick heavy shit up off the floor. Now, I so that's my that that's my honest.

SPEAKER_01:

I I really I love that because it makes first of all, I think it it brings to light of you've you've always been the challenger of the relationship. Sure. And there's been many times where because our relationship early on was business because I I paid to work out with you. That's what I did, right?

SPEAKER_04:

And I had to be your friend. You had to be nice to me.

SPEAKER_01:

You had and you just hung on there.

SPEAKER_04:

I loved how insane you were with a bunch of 40-year-old women around you, just like bear crawling, knocking over for Roseanne or Ray Ann. Just anyone in your way.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, so that's me and soccer. So here's the you you're saying the exact same thing my dad said in high school. I was a wrestler, I was a good wrestler, I could have won state. I like soccer. I loved soccer. I wanted to be a soccer player. Now I'm not. I'm not at all. But I here here's what I'm I'm thinking about. I love how isn't there a balance for me? I think you're right. I think yes, I'm naturally built. My wife challenged me this too, is and she's shown me a lot more attention because I've been lifting heavy weights and I'm you know, you can see it, you know, you can tell it.

SPEAKER_04:

And did your kids come to the powerlifting meet? They did. Were they proud as hell? But they really can't, all they can do is come to the finish line and watch you cross. They have no idea what you went through to get there. Yeah. Right? Versus like they get to watch you squat 400 pounds, deadlift 500 pounds, bench 350 pounds. I mean, like, yeah, that's so cool. That to me, like, just from my own, like just to take the focus back on me, bodybuilding show, yeah. It was it was not that interesting to show my kid and my wife, like, oh, stand here in the front row, watch me in the front row, walk across the stage, throw a couple poses out and in a in a you know, in a in board shorts. Like it wasn't that interesting. But for for them to come and sit front row and watch me power lift, like they get to see you do the work that you prepped to do. Yeah, right. And I think it's I mean, same thing with soccer, they get to see you, you know, you you engaging in the game versus like it's such a personal experience to do a bodybuilding show or a marathon, and and even being a competitor or being a participant, or not a participant, a a uh just a somebody who comes to watch, yeah. They're all they see is like there's Mitch. Yeah. Or then I'm at the final line, oh there's Mitch. He looks really tired.

SPEAKER_01:

He's running really slow. I'm sure he ran faster early on. My first mare my first Chicago marathon, uh my very good friend Andrew Prater, who does I don't think he's a listener because he's never mentioned it, but he needs to be listening. Uh happened to be at the Chicago Marathon because his they were going to Chicago as a family, and his aunt or something was at the Ronald McDonald house thing, and it's a cool party or whatever. And I happened to be running the marathon. And so I ran it solo. I didn't know anybody there. I I did I knew a few people there, so I should I take that back. I came and they ran, but I was on my own, and he videoed me, he got me in a video, and it was during the COVID year where you couldn't really get close or whatever. But I thought it was my PR, I was coming up this last 200 meters, and I thought I was blazing fast. And he showed me there's this video of me running, and this old fat woman blast past me at the finish. I mean, blast past me, where I'm like, she in everyday life, you would think she has a locker, and it was the most humbling thing I have ever seen in my life. My life. Okay, so let's get back to this. So if I put the effort, energy, and time and it's not that much time. I mean, your power lifting is boring.

SPEAKER_04:

Four days a week. You know, like a push day, uh, like a bench day, a squat day, a deadlift day, and then like maybe running all three uh with some accessory work on that fourth day.

SPEAKER_01:

Wouldn't it be to be an average marathon runner and be a champion powerlifter?

SPEAKER_04:

You know what would be cool is to be a champion of anything. Yeah, that's true. So I'm just gonna like since you haven't I think the op the opportunity in starting powerlifting at 40 is you haven't blown out your your your knees and you haven't screwed up your back and you haven't messed up. I mean you have a little bit of a shoulder issue, but like you you don't have the wear and tear that like these young power lifters probably end up. Like I think the life of a power lifter is probably 10 years, you know, eight to ten years because they just you know from injury and just overuse. But your starting point is such at such a high level, you know, and you're 40, so you're competing against 40 to 49 year olds, you just have this window where you're gonna be the youngest in the in the category, yeah, and you're you're already like a top, you know, five percent of your and just and you didn't even do I mean you barely tried. I mean you did try. I'm not I'm not gonna get it. You just did a you did a real layman, like you you didn't really like dive you know as deep as you could have. So if you actually did that for six months and like came into the April, there's an April power lift you meet at uh lift AT. Run by powerlifting America, like the one the US the USA powerlifting America. Is that the one we're members of the one we're members of? We'd have to re-sign up for next year. But the other one that's like more like more competitive. Yeah. You know, I mean that would that would give you six months to basically like build up to that and then go kick a little ass and see and and and and be the best 40 plus guy in Austin.

SPEAKER_00:

I'll be for okay.

SPEAKER_04:

I mean, let's do it. I'd rather you be that than like a hybrid athlete that's kind of mediocre bull.

SPEAKER_01:

I mean, no, I'm no. Here's what I've come to grips with. And I had a conversation with one of my old bosses today. He's a very good friend, good dude. Love him, Vance Martin. I'm gonna share this podcast with him for this reason. Um he told me today, we were talking about just life and everything to go, and he's like, he asks really good questions. And what I came to the conclusion of is I tend to be my worst enemy. And I come across right away, and this is what you're gonna wanna why you laughing. Sorry, continue. I come, so you know this about me is I come on really optimistic, um high energy, I'm all those things. But you've seen me now, we've known each other for 12 years. You know that's not every day, and most days I'm not those things. What he asked me was he asked me a question about past employment and a couple things, and I just said, you know, I what it is is I have a passion and desire to please, and I know what is necessary to succeed at those things, but I know while I'm having those conversations initially where people are engaged and like, yes, you are the winner, you are the guy, Mitch, you can do this. I know that I'm ultimately going to disappoint. And what he said to me was it seems that you don't like yourself.

SPEAKER_03:

Whoa.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. You hate yourself, is what he said, actually. And there was a lot of buildup to this, and there's a lot of backstory, but what he what he was saying in that was what we think of ourselves is ultimately what's gonna happen, right? And what you're describing to me is exactly what was described to me my whole life. Focus on this, Mitch. You're very, very good at this. You are going to be a champion, X, Y, and Z. I hear that and I say, absolutely, I'm in. I'm gonna win, I'm gonna do that. But I'm also going to run marathon still. Like it's this, it I don't even want to say self-sabotage because it's not that necessarily, because there's still success in all those things, right? We can you can look at my life and be like, oh, he's he's the man, he's successful, he's X, he's done X, Y, and Z. But ultimately I look at it and I go, well, what if, what if I go all in in April and I go to Lyft ATX, and I come in, and I just don't. What does that what does that communicate to me? And that is the crux of the whole thing. Is my identity has been so wrapped up in what people think of me that I would rather be an average mediocre soccer player than a state champion wrestler, even though I had a path, right? And I can talk about what could have been, and I can talk about the good old days, and I can talk about how I'm almost good enough. That's deep stuff that I'm kind of dealing with and working through of understanding that you're right. Probably the best thing for me is to say I'm going all in in April, and I'm gonna be the strongest person in Austin and beyond in my age group or whatever, rather than a I want, I'm a I'm a championship powerlifter. We got our medals, you are too.

unknown:

Yep.

SPEAKER_01:

First, there was one person in each of our divisions, you know? Yeah, and and that is that is, I think, that is the difference between being undeniable and not. And I I think I would much I I desperately desire for people to believe in me and love me, but I'm also the guy that kind of fizzles out in the path, like fizzles out in the process. Excuses, I work through it, don't worry my personality. My dad said it in college, because I hated school, but I went to school because that's what you do. Um, I liked relationships, I like building relationships, I like fun, I like all those things, but I don't love school. My dad said to me, and this first time I really kind of came to grips with it was in my 30s, honestly. And he said, You are gonna have to come to a point where your actual work has to outperform your ability to make people like you and let you pass. And I I'm botching the quote, but basically it is, I assume I'm gonna win you over enough that you're gonna love me and appreciate me and like me enough that even if I fail at the thing you want me to do, you're gonna be like, but we love Mitch, he's a great guy. Yeah, at some point you have to perform. And so when you say that's what you need to do, from you're a fitness professional, you know what's up. When you say that to me, I kind of think the same thing is like, yeah, absolutely. Like, let's go. Like right now, I'm going all in. F2 marathons that I have signed up for, San Antonio and Austin, which I will still run. Don't worry about that. I will still run, I'll run average. I'll be at the 50 percentile, like I am in everything.

SPEAKER_04:

But one, you will be a book. One, I will be a book and make so you'll be you'll be at the one percentile. I will be in the one percentile.

SPEAKER_01:

Here's the also the thing about that piece is this is what Stacy said to me after my 18th marathon. She said, at what point are you gonna take this serious? Because I in the last one I ran was Austin this year, and I said, I'm gonna drink everything that's passed to me, and it's gonna be funny, and I'm gonna have a good time, and whatever. And I use that as an excuse to not even try. Hey, I got it done, I got the medal. Everybody's like, oh, you ran Austin too. That is mitigating any type of insecurity, any type of rejection. I made the choice right away. So to go into a powerlifting competition, knowing what you're saying is like that's what you need to lean into. You're an you're a freaking miner that has an axe, and it's like that's what you're doing. You're chopping down trees, you're that guy.

SPEAKER_04:

Not a not an under 18 guy, but a person who works at a coal mine, that kind of miner. What did I say? A minor. I just like you. A minor great one. Um, so let me say two things to reinforce. First of all, it it only makes sense if it's what you want, not what I told you what I think. So everything I say is meaningless unless it resonates with a core piece of you. Yeah. So that's one. Good. Secondly, you work with elite runners and athletes, people doing incredible things in the space that they have books written about them and podcasts and all imagine you working with those people and being the fucking elite power lifter that comes to the table a little differently than like a guy that just runs marathons at you know, three and a half hours or four hours.

SPEAKER_01:

Dude, if I got a three and a half hour, I would be elite. Uh, five hours. Let's put five.

SPEAKER_04:

But my point is it's like, yeah, you're you you're bringing this every man to talk to elite people. That's good. Instead of going, how can I be elite? I I'm around all these elite human beings that have taught me a lot about their mindset and how they think about things and how they prioritize their sport or their you know, whatever they're doing. How can I, I mean, all your work with with Nick Bear, like that guy is an elite mindset. Um how could you take the knowledge that you've learned kind of that you've kind of gotten from what your experience working with him and his book and all that kind of stuff, and say, if I put that into my powerlifting, yeah, I can be undeniable. Yeah. Because that is the thing that you're an athlete, you're determined, and I think there's a place in you that I, and this is probably why we're part of why we're doing this podcast, Mitch, is like there's a place where you want to step into a different chapter. Yeah. You know, you see me at 50, you just turn 40, you know, you you compliment my discipline and all that, but like I'm, you know, I'm very aware of where I'm elite and where I'm not. Yeah. As tall as I am, I'm not built to be a power lifter. It was so fun to do. It was fun to watch. But I'm not, I'm not a champion. Right? As tall as I am, yeah, how I build muscle, I'm not meant to be a bodybuilder. I love doing it. It's fun. I watched Mr. Olympia last weekend. I'm the guy that watches other guys in in G strings pose on stage without any sexual connection with it.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, why do you have to go there? I'm just making it clear.

SPEAKER_04:

But I I love the sport, yeah, but I also know that like that's like I I I know myself well enough to know like where my where my deepest impact can be. Right. And I think what I want you to to chew on from this podcast and and anybody else listening, because I think the reason why we have these conversations, and I love that we've gone as deep as we did, and thank you for like opening up and sharing, because I think there's a lot of guys out there that that on some level, maybe it's fitness, maybe it's their own relationship with their spouse or with their kids, they feel like they're not they're gonna be a disappointment. Yes. They're they're trying, they're they're they're they're they're bringing some effort to it, but they feel like they're gonna fail eventually. Yes. And that that fear of failure, you know, can can can haunt us. And we can we can not have that at all in one aspect of our of our life. Yeah, and we can have it in you know tenfold in one other aspect, and somehow they don't re they don't transition over. So I've just that that's that's great. I think there's a lot of people that have that too.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, I you know, I've talked to a lot of successful people, I've I know a lot of CEOs, I know I know a lot of people that are elite in a lot of things, just like you do. And I've been trying to pinpoint what is the common denominator with most of those people, and the majority of those people, and this I was telling my wife multiple weeks ago, majority of those people are physically fit. Like they just look good. You look at them like, oh, they put time in. But after this type of conversation, I think the difference is because it's not just that, because I know a lot of very insecure, very unsuccessful, fit people, I think the difference is that level of I am going to go here and I'm gonna reach my full potential in one aspect of my life that I know I can be successful in. And then going beyond the average, just like I think the powerlifting competition, yeah, I deadlifted more than I ever had. If I hadn't deadlifted 505, the powerlifting competition would have felt different. But I came away with that feeling more confidence than I've ever felt going, I can do amazing things that people are surprised by. And but the battle really is internal, it's not about the external because I think people are impressed by very little things. People are impressed by whatever social media image you put up, but I think the battle is internal, it is internal. And if I can push for the example of that, the if I could really just zero in and just go for it, that might be the difference. That might be the change. And I think anybody that's listening is probably internalizing it somehow and and understanding, hey, this is where I was, or if you're if you're still wearing your state championship football ring at 40, take it off. Yes, that was cool, but what's next? And I I'm guilty of that a hundred percent. I just told the kids the other day, I still have my first place ribbon of the first wrestling tournament I ever won, and last wrestling tournament I ever won, right? Like there's things that you can look at and go, move on. What are you what's next? And the uh that's that's the mindset that I think needs to happen. I've I've been pretty honest with you off mic of the struggles I've been dealing with personally and professionally. But the reality is if if I could find a place where I'm elite and I find purpose and I can drive and be a champion or even just compete at a high level, it doesn't even need to be a champion. I play in a men's soccer league on a Tuesday night, right? Just to show that I can still do it. If you can do that in whatever area of life that you can do, that exudes everywhere else. Just what just like our guests in the past. They all have one common denominator. It's not that they all look good with their shirts off, it has to do with they've decided to try to be elite in one area. This is what I do, this is how I do it. And I think that's pretty cool. And that's the that is the ethos of what we do, right? That's the ethos of dad bods and dumbbells. It started out as a joke. Hey, I'm the I'm the dad bod, you're the dumbbell, blah, blah, blah. But the reality is, I think what we're trying to do is challenge and drive people to be better than they were the the day before. And that's what you do for me, buddy. Appreciate it.

SPEAKER_04:

Wow. Well, guys, I didn't we had no idea we were going this time.

SPEAKER_01:

I still want to talk about Oregon football, but I guess not.

SPEAKER_04:

So how about we do this? Yeah. Yeah, let's wrap it up here. We're we're 46 minutes in. Uh, so we all we owe it to our listeners too. If you're still listening, you're you're you are bad. First of all, you're badass. You might be crying right now because you related to Mitch's story so well. Um, but you know, Mitch, I I appreciate you, man. I I I think both of us have adapted in this life with nice guy vibes to protect our little boy inside. You know, the little boy who who is afraid that unless he was a nice guy, he wouldn't be accepted or seen or whatever. Um, and so I can I can relate with that. And I've had 10 years to to solve some of those demons, and I'm still going to therapy solving those demons and understanding them. But uh I think this is you know, every time you you hit a new decade, I think it's the time to process and look ahead and say, how can I be a better version of myself? Absolutely. You know, and so I mean I I just Yeah, I mean I you gotta you gotta you gotta want the thing you want. You know, I I'm I'm enjoying not having like a new goal. Like I don't want to do another powerlifting show soon. I don't want to do a bodybuilding show. I'm kind of enjoying doing like rowing. Yeah, like I'm doing a lot of like row ergs, you know. Yeah, and I'm like maybe maybe that's a thing. Maybe I maybe I get on the lake and and I start and I join like a two-man rowing team and we start coming. I mean, I that I talk about something I'm built for. Like every day I cross the San Diego State quad as a freshman, the rowing team would like chase me down and be like, you're supposed to be a rower, and I'm like, I don't know what you're talking about. That sounds lame. I've seen you do it, and they're like, I'm like, what time y'all get up and row? 5 a.m. I'm like, I'm out. I'm out.

SPEAKER_01:

I've always been worried about being able to keep the the rower afloat. I'm just so dense. You're very dense.

SPEAKER_04:

It's gonna sink. Yeah, but you know, if you're the if you're the guy at the front of the of the of the you know, group of w of soldiers going to the battle carrying the battle axe, yeah. I'm the guy on the horse with the long with the with like the long bow. Yeah, yeah. Right, like using my arm length and flow, like shooting this long bow over the top to like, you know, get you know, like that's that's where my body type works in war is like some long or maybe like maybe a runner who's like send running messages to like the different factions.

SPEAKER_01:

You're definitely gonna be the guy that we pull out as like the David and Goliath situation. You're Goliath. We pull you out to intimidate the the other truth. Yeah, maybe okay. You're you're a giant. I I think that's the be told though, the truth be told.

SPEAKER_04:

Truth be told.

SPEAKER_01:

Truth be told, honestly. Let's say that. God's watching, I don't care what you say. Is um I gotta pee so bad.

SPEAKER_04:

I do too.

SPEAKER_01:

You gotta go with your body type too. I mean, there are physical limitations to what you can do. And yes, we we've all at one point wanted to be a skater boy, but we're not gonna be able to do that.

SPEAKER_04:

You ain't Tony Hawk.

SPEAKER_01:

You're not. You're not. You're not designed to be able to do that.

SPEAKER_04:

All right, 30 seconds. So OU and OU? Yeah, OU in Texas played. Oh my goodness. I I watched like the half of the first half, and I was like, I I was at a party. I was at a party. I was at a party, and the party was awesome, and the uh and the the the first half was dog shit. So bad. So I stopped watching, and I got home. I can't when I got home, I looked at the score and it was like 20 to 3 or 20 to 6, and I'm like, what the fuck? So anyway, congratulations to UT and and you know Arch Manning for like finding a pulse.

SPEAKER_01:

Let's go. Finally.

SPEAKER_04:

And their defense looks good, which is their defense finally found a rhythm. Um on this on a sad note, you're Oregon boys.

SPEAKER_01:

Sad note, go IU, baby. Go Hoosers. My alum. I'm a lump.

SPEAKER_04:

Excuse me, I've got something in my throat.

SPEAKER_01:

So my wife uh is very superstitious when it comes to sports. She's a Green Bay Packer fan, so she'll change her clothes halftime.

SPEAKER_04:

Is this gonna be wrapped up in 20 seconds? Because we gotta go.

SPEAKER_01:

I love you. Uh she changed her shirt from an organ shirt to the IU alumni shirts we get when we're halftime because we contribute to the IU Alumni Association. And uh it was horrible to watch, but honestly, IU looks like it. Like they they are the one like not fakers. I think they can go after Ohio How Fakers. So for me, I was happy for IU, but also very upset with Oregon because they could have put it together. They could have won, yes. They kept it closed, and it was garbage, but IU had that game. You can just tell. And just like how OU and Oregon had you just all I think Oregon is gonna do well, they're gonna make the playoffs, maybe win a game in the playoffs, that's what I hope. But IU has the potential to go all the way, and after that, Oregon, I think that's a perfect time to sell it some hard, it's an easy thing to end the games and then go right away. So let's go Hoosiers. I like that.

SPEAKER_04:

By the way, uh Texas AM looks amazing. Oh my goodness, and uh, they're playing in Texas right after Thanksgiving. I've got three tickets that I'm selling. So any listeners, you want first dibs. Three tickets, section 103. They're on on on vivid tickets, they're going for like 580. Oh yeah. 580 a ticket on vivid tickets right now. Listener, I'll give you a deal. I'll give you a deal. All right, we're gonna wrap it up here. Yeah. Uh Mitch, thank you for your honesty, your heart, your ability to be vulnerable. And uh, you know, I think that's for our listeners out here that stuck it out if you do and a half minutes. Uh we're we're proud of you guys listening and hopefully getting some out of it.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, I appreciate you always challenging me. I love you for that. I love you listeners, thank you guys for listening to the chat bots and dumbbells. Thank you for liking, subscribing, and sharing. We'll see you next time.