Ep. 69 - 5 Things to Tell Yourself Every Morning to Transform Your Day

In today's episode, I am sharing 5 phrases to tell yourself every morning that can help you create the mindset you need to have the best possible day. 

I recently needed some morning guidance myself and found a very helpful YouTube video that went over 5 powerful sayings you can use to really transform your day.  And I am sharing that wisdom with you because the thoughts you choose to have in the mornings can create a peaceful or stressful day for you. 

This YouTube Video can be a great resource for you as it was for me. 

90-day Self-Growth Journal - A great companion you can use on your healing journey. For 90 days you will have daily prompts on the topics of self-love, self-care and gratitude.  This journal is great for beginners, novice and anyone that wants to dive deeper into their true selves.   https://amzn.to/4fk14sq

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:41

Hello and welcome to the She can Heal Podcast, a podcast aimed at helping women heal and thrive emotionally, physically, and spiritually. I am your host, Kayla El Dia. I'm a licensed therapist and a self-care advocate that is passionate about helping women take back their power and help them realize they're important, worthy, and deserve the care and attention they give to those they love most in their lives. This show is meant to help inspire you on your healing journey, no matter if you're in the discovery phase and are just realizing that you have unhealed wounds, habits, and mindsets that are keeping you stuck in your life, or you've been on this journey for a while and are looking for inspiration, encouragement, andor new tools to help you continue on your healing journey. My goal is to help you realize that you can heal from all that life has thrown at you and are capable of evolving into your healthiest and happiest virgin. On this show, I will provide you with resources, tools, and insights to help you heal and thrive emotionally, physically, and spiritually because you deserve all of that. So if you're ready to ditch the guilt and make yourself a priority, then you're at the right place. Because the truth is that you can't pour from an empty cup, even though most of us do this on a regular, and we really need to stop that nonsense. So get ready to be inspired, motivated, and equipped to truly thrive. Hello and welcome back to another episode on the Shaken Heel podcast. I hope that this episode is finding you doing well. I know we're in the middle of winter or the beginning of winter, actually. It just feels like we're in the middle because I am from New England and it is so cold, and today it's actually snowing, so we're struggling out here. I hope that wherever you're from, you're doing well. And today I wanted to talk about just our mindset, only because it is something that I'm personally going through and just supporting the women that I do. I know we are all in that place of struggle just because life is just so life right now. And the other morning, while I was doing my morning routine, so every morning I do my journaling routine, I'll do a stretching routine. But this particular morning, I felt that I was needing something more. It felt like it was there was something missing that I needed in that moment. It's almost like my soul was like asking for some guidance. I felt like I needed something to inspire me for the day. I just felt like I just needed something to help me as I began my day. So I went on YouTube and I was searching inspirational videos because I felt I just needed a little bit of that guidance. But I wasn't looking for a motivational speech, you know, like life coaches going through these big topics. I feel like I wanted to go just a little bit deeper. But I wanted something short, something that could give me that little pep in my step, just that little short inspirational message that can really help me and guide me. So I found this YouTube channel called The Buddha Motivation. And I found a video that was, I think it was about less than 10 minutes. And the video was Five Things to Tell Yourself in the Morning to Transform Your Day. And honestly, I really enjoyed it because not only did he give you these five sayings, but then he went on to explain why these sayings could be really helpful. And because it was such a good way to start my day, I want to share those five sayings with you, and I want to help you to understand these five sayings and ways that they can help to shape your morning. Because the truth is that your morning sets the stage for your day. If you wake up filled with negative thoughts about your day, even before the day starts, that's gonna create this mindset that's gonna focus you on what is not going well. It's gonna focus on all the things that we are having a hard time to accept. But if you wake up thinking positive or peaceful thoughts, that's gonna help you to focus on your present moment and accept it for what it is instead of what you want it to be, right? It helps you to let go of anything that isn't going the way that you want. But again, it's learning to accept it for what it is because honestly, that's where the peace comes in. And when we have good, peaceful thoughts, such as focusing on gratitude or looking forward to the day, you create serotonin, that feel-good um hormone or chemical that's gonna help you to feel good in that moment, versus when you have stressful or worried thoughts, you create cortisol, the stress hormone, right? So it's almost like saying to yourself, you know, when we wake up in the morning and things are just not going right, maybe you woke up a little later than you intended, or maybe you forgot to do something last night that you have to spend time this morning, or maybe you wake up and it's raining outside, or snowing outside. And those are the kinds of things that can really help us to shift out of that present moment awareness of being in that place of acceptance versus being upset because something is happening that you are not happy with, right? Because the truth is it's really up to us to decide how we think about what's happening around us, right? It's never what happened, it's what we think about it. So, an example would be if I woke up 10 minutes later, instead of being so upset and waking up all mad and going through my day all mad, right? I can say, I can accept it for what it is. I can be upset about it because acceptance isn't trying to have that like toxic positivity of like, oh, it's fine. No, it's not fine. I'm up, I'm upset. I'm upset that I woke up 10 minutes late, but there's nothing I can do about it except just accept that it happened and then just continue on with my day. Meaning maybe I have to cut something a little short. And it's okay because I can choose to think about it that way, right? Again, it's not denying what you're feeling, it's just really accepting what happened and then learning how to just let it go so that you don't bring that into your day, right? You don't fill yourself with stress because now if you're filled with stress, now the rest of your morning is gonna be stressful. And then everything going forward, you're gonna notice all the things that are going on that you are not happy with. Versus if I wake up and I just accept it or I wake up on gratitude, right? If I wake up 10 minutes late, I can say, you know what, I woke up 10 minutes late, but I still have plenty of time to get ready. I'm not gonna be late. Or I can accept that I woke up 10 minutes late and I'm probably going to be 10 minutes late to work. And you know what? I just have to accept that that's what happened and choose to let it go. So let me tell you something about myself. And when I first started my own personal growth journey, this used to be me. And it was really easy for me to wake up and focus on things that weren't going well. You know, sometimes what happens is you wake up and maybe something like that happens, right? Something that just happened that was out of our control. Or anything like that, like the rain, the snow, all those types of things used to just make me feel unhappy in the mornings, and then I would just be in the stress state, and then I would go on to work. And of course, things just go downhill from there because that's just what happens when you choose that mindset, right? So then I get on the highway, of course, there's a there's traffic, and that's gonna make me even more pissed off. And so then now I'm like pissed off because now I'm gonna be late for work. Then I get to work and I'm already in this stress state before I even started my work day, right? I don't want to say hi to nobody because I'm already upset. I might go into my office, and sometimes things happen because we're such in this stressful state. Sometimes it might be something like I spilled the coffee on me in the car, or I came in and I totally forgot that I was supposed to bring something, or I forgot my lunch, or something like that. And that usually just starts with having that negative thought and stressful thought in the morning. And so that was used to that used to be me. And I used to wake up, maybe I would rush, or maybe there was traffic and I'll get so upset, and then I'll start my day like that. And literally I would allow myself to carry that into my whole day, and I would have a bad day. I literally would feel so stressed and so unhappy throughout my day that the day would just feel so heavy and I could not wait to go home. And when I learned that I actually have the power to choose how I feel and how I see my life, things started to change, right? Again, it's about accepting things for what they are. So if I went to on my way to work and I hit traffic, which listen, if you work somewhere where you need to take a highway, it's a given that you're gonna encounter traffic at some point, right? And so I learned that when I got on the highway and I saw the traffic jam, I learned to just breathe through it and say, it is what it is. I cannot change this, I cannot do anything about it. So I'm just going to focus on maybe listening to an audiobook or a podcast, and I'm just gonna get through it. And when I get to work, I get to work. If I get there a little late, I get there a little late. These are things that are out of our control, and we can choose to either shift that mindset to really acceptance and letting go, or stay in that place of suffering and pain, which honestly is going to make you miserable. And so once you learn that, like once I learned that Kayla, it's really up to you to decide what you think about these certain situations, and you yourself can choose to just let them go and focus on something else like gratitude, it changed my perspective and it changed the way I thought. So, because I think this is really, really important, I wanted to share this video with you. I wanted to share the five things and go into them a little bit to help you understand why this would be such a good way to start your day. And you could do this in so many ways. Again, I think this video was less than 10 minutes. I'm gonna actually look into it and see what exactly is. Let's see. This video is five minutes. Look at that, five minutes, so it's less than six minutes, so it's a very easy saying that you could or video that you can play in the mornings if you wanted to. I'm gonna actually link it in the show notes so that you guys can listen to it if you want to. I would encourage you to. I'm gonna go through each of the five sayings that he talked about and go into each one and under so that you can understand each one. But I'll also link it so you guys can listen on your own. So let's start with number one. And number one is I am grateful for this new day. So starting your day with gratitude for another day is one of the best ways that you can start your day, right? Because to reminding yourself that life is a blessing and that you're gifted with this new day, unlike many others who were not. And the video says that when you first wake up, one way to do this is when you first wake up, take three slow breaths and say to yourself, I am grateful for this new day, and allow that gratitude to fill your heart and your mind. So even before you open your eyes, really being in presence with yourself and saying that to yourself, versus if you think about it, many of us, especially in the winter, many of us, when you the alarm goes off, you are already stressed out because you're like, you know, waking up is kind of stressful, right? Because you're in this like deep sleep and this alarm just kind of pulls you out of sleep. So waking up is a stressful situation, regardless, unless you wake up on your own and you don't have like little by little, but usually we we wake up with an alarm and it is stressful on our bodies, right? And then you start going into the mindset of I don't want to wake up, or it's so warm in my bed, I don't want to go into the cold, I don't want to go to work, right? We go into that whole mindset. So that already starts you off on a really stressful place, right? And so what he's saying is change it up a little bit, right? When you wake up, just take a couple deep breaths, just be with yourself for just a couple seconds and say something like, I am grateful for this new day, before you get out of bed. So shift that mindset. Even if you wake up feeling a bit stressed, because again, like who wants to wake up? Sometimes you're really tired, or sometimes you're just thinking about the especially now in winter, it's not it's not fun getting up. But if you can say to yourself, All right, hold on, let me pause, let me take a couple deep breaths, right? You don't have to shift out of bed and start all. No, just sit, stay there for just a couple more seconds and say something like to yourself, like, I am grateful for this new day. And sometimes even putting your hand on your heart to just like be with your presence just for a little bit before you start your day could really make a shift in how you feel throughout your morning. And again, the morning is that time where it sets the stage for the rest of your day. So if you can wake up feeling calm and you can wake up feeling just more peaceful and calm, you can really make a difference in your day. All right, number two is I let go of yesterday. That's a really powerful one because think about it. Whatever happened yesterday already happened, no matter what it was. And what they say is that your attachment to the past is the route to suffering. So learning to detach yourself from thoughts, from experiences, from anything that is not good for your mind is the route to happiness. Right. So giving yourself the freedom to begin fresh and just saying whatever happened yesterday happened, right? Because every day is a new opportunity for you to use choose peace over pain, right? Because yesterday already happened. And so if you're stuck in the what happened yesterday, maybe something really bad happened, maybe you had a really painful experience or something didn't go right or whatever it is. We can choose to accept that today is a new day. Today, I'm not in yesterday anymore. I am today, right? And today, I can choose to just look forward to whatever's gonna happen today, and learning to detach from thoughts and feelings that came from yesterday can be a really great way for us to invite peace into our lives. This is probably the number one reason most people are in pain and suffering, is because they're stuck in the past. They are stuck in whatever happened yesterday, last week, and they cannot detach from it. So, this is an area that I think could be extremely helpful. It's learning ways to detach from the things that have already happened. But sometimes just even starting with I let go of yesterday and focus on today could be a really helpful way to start your day. Number three says, I am calm and in control of my life. And what he says is that the Buddha taught, rule your mind or it will rule you. So before your day begins, with whatever challenges may come, this is a good way to anchor yourself in the moment, right? No matter what happens outside of you, you have the power to choose what happens inside. I always say, well, I heard this once, right? It's that happiness is an inside job. Right? It's what happens inside of ourselves, it's what we think about what happens. It is what we choose to stay with, what we choose to be in. So taking some time to sit in stillness and using your breath to bring calmness and peace into your present moment can be another way to have a really good day. Okay, because most of us don't do that. Most of us don't make time to just sit with ourselves just for a couple minutes and using something as simple as our breath to just calm our mind and calm our bodies. And so doing something like this in the morning, again, it's just sitting in stillness, using your breath to calm your mind, calm your body, and again, say something like, I am calm and in control of my life. This could be a really great grounding technique that you can use in the morning or honestly, anytime during your day, to really be grounded in peace and be grounded in calmness. Number four says, I will respond with kindness today. By choosing kindness, you break the cycle of negativity. He says that trying to visualize yourself, doing one kind act before your day even starts is a great way to start your day, right? Because this simple intention can shape your entire day. And again, we're not talking about like if someone's really mean to you, you must be kind to them, right? Sometimes it's really accepting that this person is the way that they are, but I'm not gonna change the way that I am. Just because people are mean and people are unhappy around me doesn't mean that I have to be mean and I have to be unhappy. It means that I can still be a kind person, I can still say hi to someone, I can still choose to do something, like hold the door open for someone. Or if I'm at work and someone left their copy in the copy machine, right? I can choose to be kind and either bring it to them or put it in their mailbox, right? If I'm going out for coffee, I can choose to ask my coworker, hey, I'm going to Duncan, would you like a coffee? Which anytime someone has done that for me, it just feels really sweet and really nice. Again, people are gonna be mean, people are gonna be unhappy, people are gonna be assholes all over the place. But does that mean that you have to be that way? No, right? That means that they are who they are and I can't change them, but I'm gonna still be a good person. I'm still gonna bring kindness into my day. I'm gonna give you this little story that happened to me yesterday when I was um grocery shopping. And when you're grocery shopping, like I don't like grocery shopping myself. I just think this is one of the hardest tasks that I have to do. I don't know why. I was thinking about it yesterday. I'm like, is it because and honestly, I was thinking it's because there's a lot of people everywhere, the long lines, but honestly, even when it's not busy, I don't like it. But anyways, I went grocery shopping yesterday, and as I was going through the fruit aisle, this older man looked at my car and he made this comment. He's like, Oh, you're almost done. You want to switch with me, you know? And again, these are situations that happened, and in that moment, I thought that was so much that was so fun for someone to just randomly, you know, have this fun banter with me. And you know, so we went back and forth. I'm like, oh no, I'm done. I'm trying to be out of here. And you know, it was just, I don't know, to me, it was this like this kind gesture that he just decided to make a comment to me. And you know, we went through this back and forth of like, no, I'm done, and you want to do this for me. And it was kind of fun, but again, that's the whole idea of being kind, sometimes just even being out in public and just saying hi to someone. I was also watching this video, I think it was on TikTok, and it was this lady, and she's just driving around her town or city, and she stops and she makes these really cool comments to people. Like, what did she say? She looked at this older lady and she said, Excuse me. She says, That outfit looks amazing on you, right? And that shifts completely that person's like mood. You know, like you, it must be illegal to look that good. And it's to me, I just love watching videos like that because again, that is just kindness. Being using kindness in your day is such a great way to be like to help people laugh, to smile, or for yourself, you know, one of the most important things is being kind to yourself, you know. So if you make a mistake or if something isn't going right, that we can choose to be kind to ourselves and not choose to be, you know, self-critical to ourselves could be one of those most important things. All right. And the last one is everything is temporary, so I will enjoy this moment. And he reminds us that it's really up to us to enjoy the moments as they come because they do not last, right? Even the unhappy moments and experiences don't last, right? The busyness, the stress, all of that will pass. The good times, the peace, that too will pass. So it's so important for us to stay in the moment. And again, I'll go back to acceptance, right? Because it's probably easy to be in the moment in the good times, right? It's saying to ourselves, wow, this is a I'm having a good day, I'm spending time with people I enjoy, I'm doing this really fun activity, I'm just feeling good and it's easy. But it's a reminder that everything is temporary. So even when you're having a really stressful day, just reminding yourself that that is also temporary. I don't have to stay in this stressful state for the whole week. I can choose to release it and focus that tomorrow or the next hour will be different if I choose to. Right. This is also something that I worked on myself because like I started this conversation talking about how, you know, certain things would just like make my morning awful and then I would drag it into the whole day. And I used to learn that, you know what, things are gonna happen, right? There might be things in the mornings that you just can't control that really does shift your mood and make you feel just stressed in the moment, like stress, like traffic, right? For me, that was traffic. I'm doing much better with it, but traffic will always be that thing, right? So let's just use that example. So even if in the morning I feel really good and then I go onto the highway and there's this big traffic jam, right? And that would make me so upset. That would make me like right, all those negative thoughts come up of like, I'm so tired of this. Why do I have to drive through this traffic? No, I'm gonna probably, it's probably gonna take me like 10 minutes longer, and then it would drag into the day. I would go, I got to work, right? I already told you the story. And so I started learning that I can choose to let that go, right? I can choose to acknowledge and accept this morning was actually not good. This morning was actually stressful. This morning I wasn't feeling good with what was happening. But guess what? The morning that is gone, it's done. I choose to release it and I choose to take this moment on to choose to think about it differently. You know, so instead of taking that stress into your whole day, which I used to do, and then it would drag, it would just feel awful through the whole day. I can choose to breathe and I can choose to say, I let that go. It already happened. The morning was stressful, I let it go, and I'm choosing to now change the way that I look at my day. And I can choose one of these grounding sayings, right? Like everything is temporary, so I'm gonna just enjoy this moment. Or I can say I am calm and in control of my life. I can choose my breath to reset myself, and that can be really helpful and has definitely changed the way that I look at life now, and it changes the way that I go about my day. So those were the five sayings. I am sure that you can, I am sure that these five sayings can be such a great way for you to start your morning. I would definitely encourage you to listen to the video. Again, it's only it's less than six minutes, and it is just very powerful. But again, waking up each day with the mindset of gratitude and acceptance and peace is going to help you to get go into your day with a sense of calmness. But I know it's a practice, right? It's something that we have to continue to work on. It's something that I continually work on. Our mindset is just that. It's just something that we constantly have to just check in and make sure we're on the right path, especially if we're not feeling good. But if you notice that you're constantly stressed or your outlook on your life or circumstances is negative and stressful, remind yourself of these sayings. Use these sayings as something that you can really ground yourself in. First, we must have gratitude for having a new day to experience, right? Because by holding on to yesterday, we are attaching ourselves to the past. We can remind ourselves that we can invite calmness and peace into our lives, but we must believe we can, right? Because if we believe otherwise, then you're the one creating that chaos for yourself. Kindness is the route to happiness. Even when others are being negative towards us, we can still choose to make kindness a part of who we are. And then remembering that everything is temporary. So enjoy the good moments with all your presence, for it also will pass, but don't allow the unhappy moments to stick around because those two will pass, and it's up to us to decide to just breathe and detach from them. Okay, my friend, I hope this was helpful to you, especially if you are like me who needs these reminders from time to time. I think sometimes we're being pulled into, you know, spaces that remind us that I think I need to take a little reset, I think I need to take a little more time for myself. I'm noticing that I've been really stressed, I'm noticing that my mindset needs a little kind of reset. This is what happens to me. And sometimes we just need to reach for those resources that really help us. I mean, listen, this is just an example of what I know everybody has different beliefs. So if for you this message didn't fully resonate, but you have your own spiritual guidance that works for you, maybe this is a reminder to pull that back out. Maybe this is a reminder that you need to revisit, or maybe you need to pull that book out, you know, that resource out, whatever it is for you that's gonna help you to kind of have that mindset shift in the mornings. Maybe this is a reminder that my mornings have been a little bit harder lately. I feel that maybe it's hard waking up, or maybe it's cold and this my moods have been a lot lower lately, whatever it is. This is just a reminder that you can choose different ways to start your morning that can really be helpful. Maybe it's just that first part of just like when you wake up and you're noticing that you're feeling stressed because you're waking up and it's cold and all of that. Maybe it's saying to yourself, you know what, I'm gonna start reminding myself to just press to take a pause, take a couple deep breaths, and I'm gonna say something that's gonna be grounding for me. Again, it could be any of the things that I said here, it could be one of your sayings that you have. Maybe it's a prayer, maybe it's an affirmation, maybe it's a verbal Bible verse, whatever it is. This is meant for you to use this as guidance. So use what feels good to you. Use the resources that have really helped you to help you to really just hit that reset button and learn to have a better mindset in the morning so that you can choose to see the day as again as a blessing, as a new beginning, as something that you get to experience. Okay, so I'm gonna leave you there and I hope again, I hope this was helpful to you. If you know anyone, and I know you do, that could really use this information, that could really need that really needs this guidance, this support, please hit the share button, share this episode with them. You would be helping the show, you would be helping me spread the word, me spread my message, because that is the goal of this show. It is to try to reach as many women as possible to inspire them to truly live in their power, to feel happier, to feel healthier, because that is the goal, that is my intention. And lastly but not least, I would be so appreciative if you were to go on either Apple, Spotify, wherever you're listening to, and leave me a five-star review. That is one of the best ways you can support the channel. And I truly would be so grateful if you would. And again, thank you so much for being here and listening. And I will talk to you again next week. Take care. Thank you so much for joining this conversation today. I hope this episode was helpful to you on your healing journey. Don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode packed with valuable tips and insights designed to empower you. If you found value in this episode, I'd be so grateful if you left me a review wherever you're listening from and share your thoughts and feedback. This really helps me to reach more women just like you. Thanks for listening.