Behind the Paddle
Welcome to "Behind the Paddle", the podcast that explores the fascinating world of sex across a wide spectrum of topics; from LGBTQ+ and feminine power, to kink, sex work and the adult industry. We aim to inform, inspire and entertain, featuring expert interviews, compelling stories, and thought provoking discussions.
Join Porcelain Victoria (a very experienced Pro-Dominatrix of 9yrs) on a funny and wonderfully truthful look at the world through the lens of a BDSM practitioner working in the sex industry.
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Behind the Paddle
E16: Unusual Kinks
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In this episode, we take a deep dive into the world of unusual kinks and paraphilias, from age play to puppy play and beyond. Porcelain Victoria, shares intriguing stories from her experiences in the sex work and kink community, shedding light on how these practices emerge in her work. Plus, we invite you to play along as we try to guess different kinks based on their scientific names. Join us for a fun, insightful, and open-minded exploration of diverse sexual expressions!
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Thank you so much for listening 💖
Hi and welcome to Behind the Paddle. I am Porclain Victoria. And I am Emily Son. Yeah. And today, well, before we get into what the episode's called, we are now putting all our episodes on dark fans. And we are wearing beautiful lingerie to um just for effect really.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01Like it goes well with the subject matter, so exactly, exactly.
SPEAKER_03So yeah. Um that is where you will find all our content on Dark Fans as well as Spotify and things, but if you want to see us an old beautiful lingerie, then Dark Fans. What is the Dark Fans name? I'm pretty sure it is just Behind the Paddle. Perfect. Because I don't think anybody else has got that name, thankfully. Um but yeah, so today we are going to talk about not necessarily weird kinks, but kinks people tend to not turn their more unusual ones, ones that um maybe have a wee bit more controversial attached to people not in the know about them.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. People that go, oh really. Um so yeah, do you want to start or do you want me to start? You start. Okay. So I'm gonna start off with an easy one. I have my laptop here because I have sham memory. We are going to start with a kink. I will be using Google Translate because I'm just shit at actually saying it and the pronunciation. So we're gonna start with this one.
SPEAKER_00Paraphilic infantilism. Paraphilic infantilism.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_00Is that like DOG?
SPEAKER_01No.
SPEAKER_03Is that adult baby? It is H Play in general. Cool, that makes sense. So there's many different it it depends who you talk to because everything is so split up these days, I want to say, in terms of what is what and like labels and such. Um so H-play is usually I I would say it's like an umbrella term.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And then there's loads of things underneath it. So you have you have bigs, you have littles, you have daddies, you have mummies. I think now you've got like aunties and things. Do all of them incorporate age play though?
SPEAKER_01Is it not one of these things where like they can have an age play element but can also exist just as like how people want to call themselves? Do you know what I mean?
SPEAKER_03Um well D DLG stands for daddy don, little girl.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I've just I've seen people speaking about it online where they're saying like they're into D DLG but they're not into age play. Like age play is like a hard limit for them.
SPEAKER_02Oh.
SPEAKER_01Because they see it as like just roles that they're playing rather than it rather than them playing with the edges, they're just playing within the kind of power dynamic of those roles. If that makes sense.
SPEAKER_03See, this is where like so many have got their own interpretations of so my interpretation of like DGLG, um being like a dominatrix, I do see it as well as in my personal life. So I see it more sexually as a dominatrix. Um, but in my personal life, I don't see it as um sexual, but I know other people do.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I know that people do age play like OnlyFans and things like that, and that is just another controversial thing, yeah, which I'm sure we can um get on topic about on another podcast, but it's a difficult one because people, yeah, they have their own interpretations of it.
SPEAKER_01Like everybody's kinks are totally different, like everybody's got their own way of doing things. It was just it was just something that I had come across before, and like couldn't it quite wrap my head around? Like, I'm not saying that that's not the case for those people, I just like I'm the same as you, like I don't quite understand why do you have to like where the distinction like lies?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, why do you have to pick it apart?
SPEAKER_01I think if people are doing it sexually, then it makes sense that like they are maybe trying to take like the age element out of it.
SPEAKER_03Some people yes, yes, but my question is what exactly are you doing? What are what are you taking out of the age element?
SPEAKER_01So you can still call him daddy, yeah. That that's a role. This is what I mean. So is that is that where the distinction lies then? Where people are just seeing it as a role and taking the age element out of it and just having like the caregiver and like the care receiver in that yeah in the roles, but without age really coming into it, and it's just like more terminology-based than it is that's what it sounds like.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that that's that's what it sounds like. More more you're you're daddy, but you you don't um yeah, but then what if he references her as a little girl? But in a sexual manner. That can just be words though. I don't want to be called the little girl while I'm getting pummeled. That's a personal preference. But that doesn't does it make it sexual because he's calling you little.
SPEAKER_01But is it not more like I don't know, people call each other babe and baby, but that doesn't mean that they think they're a baby? Like people use pet names and it's cutesy, and it's more like the vibe of that than it is like the literal thing. I feel like you're pisming on this a bit.
SPEAKER_03Like baby's a bit different because it's been around and it's quite traditional.
SPEAKER_01Uh-huh. Um but does that mean that it's any less valid because it's newer and less traditional? Like, do you know what? Like, what is this just because it's something we're used to that we don't think about it in the same way?
SPEAKER_00Hmm.
SPEAKER_03Hmm. Well, I guess that is something which our listeners can talk about and give us what they think about that. Because that's uh huh.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I don't know. It's something like I've thought about before. Like, I don't know, like why I feel like we do that, we're partners, like like people speaking like baby talk to each other and stuff all the time because it's like cutesy rather than it being like I don't know, like nefarious.
SPEAKER_03Like I don't know, I remember when I did have sex with somebody and I it sounded like they said little girl, uh-huh. And I was like, oh no, I'm a woman, like I don't want to be fought as a little girl. I think it comes down to the person then because of how I don't see DGLG as sexual. Um because I I do get uncomfortable when it comes sexual, even if it's like spanking and whatnot. Um so I think it definitely comes down to the person.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Because I can see how that can be controversial quite a bit. Um yeah. Um age play, adult baby, um it's a that feels like a whole other a whole other thing. Oh yeah, yeah. Um I I do not provide age play sessions really anymore because um I personally just get too uncomfortable.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Because it it's just not for me. Yeah. And I know it's a limit for a lot of dominatrixes as well. Um, that and sissy.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Because most of them want to suck a mobble moon and it it make it get sexual while they're in the mind frame.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um yeah, I I have a lot of experience with it, which is very interesting because it gives a new outlook on it.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um, so when you come to me and say that, I'm like, oh. Huh. Okay. Take out like the sexual context and just have it with like names and things.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um, but yeah, that uh adult baby can be sexual or non-sexual. But uh adult baby, for me at least, is an adult who acts like a baby. They usually wear diapers, have a bottle, have a pacifier, um, have us.
SPEAKER_01Sort of like in too many drugs and went to too many raids to go.
SPEAKER_03And then they can go as far as having a big adult crib, a high chair. Some some eat baby food, some do not.
SPEAKER_01Um sorry, is it like an age regression thing for a lot of people? Is it like I would say it's part of age regression. Yeah. Um is it like working through trauma? Is it like that?
SPEAKER_03It can be. I mean, I know DDLG for me is working through trauma. That's why I don't like it sexually.
SPEAKER_01Totally.
SPEAKER_03I haven't got to that stage where I can confidently be like, spam me while I'm in that mood or something, because I don't know if I want to do that.
SPEAKER_01Here's an interesting one. So if it's non-sexual, would you still classify it as a kink? Is it is it like more like age regression, like working through something, rather than it being a kink per se?
SPEAKER_03Hmm.
SPEAKER_01Like, is there a difference between the two?
SPEAKER_03Is this where I mean some therapists have said that age regression does help?
SPEAKER_01Oh, totally, definitely.
SPEAKER_03So it is out there with people accepting it more and it actually being in the real world and seen as this could help your shitty childhood. Totally. Um, that's a tough one. Because what whenever I talk to people about it, I have to I feel like I have to state that I don't like it sexually.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um because I feel like most people, or some people, enjoy it sexually, and I'm just thinking no no no.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01Um I feel like that's the connotations attached to it because that's like what more people know about.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah, and you see it in porn and things like that. And pe people do what they want to do. I'm not I'm not I I don't care. Um but yeah, I I don't know. I it definitely is trauma healing, but at the same time, I'm not sucking the dick ball for him and calling him daddy. Like it's difficult because to call it a kink does it have to be sexual? I think so. But then I know somebody who likes gas masks and they don't do it sexually, they just like really, really like it, and it's a kink.
SPEAKER_01That's a tough one actually, because there's a lot of like asexual people that are into kink, and it's not because it's like a sexual experience for them. Oh yeah, I feel like we keep getting stuck on these, like they're just so there's such a big topic, and there's just so much to it. And like, I'm no psychologist, you know what I mean? At the end of the day, like, I'm gonna have to go away and think about this now. That's really stumped to me, right?
unknownHmm.
SPEAKER_03Like that this is where I'm like, oh, do I go to Union to if I can get a fucking degree in like psychology or something?
SPEAKER_01Oh, we should go together, that'll be cool, but like just kink focused, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Absolutely, totally um I don't think for it to be a kink it has to be sexual. Yeah, I do see it as a kink because I go to kink events with other people, yeah. Like DCLG events and things.
SPEAKER_01Are a lot of them like doing it sexually though? Is that not the majority?
SPEAKER_03Some of them. Some of them get off on the fact that they wear a diaper in public.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03So but when when it comes to that, I that's more of a kink.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Or more of a fetish. It's more it's more concretely a kink, anyway.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, totally.
SPEAKER_03So I think it's case by case basis, really.
SPEAKER_01Totally. And like we say, like everybody does kink differently, and everybody's got their own definition of what that looks like for each individual. Like it's no like really for us to say, I'm more just like, how do I feel about it? and I don't know.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_03I mean, I personally it takes I I want to know where your head's at when you're or why you're acting like a baby. Oh totally. Because I've had guys who want to have sex or wank off, yeah, or me act like a child.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And I'll tell you a wee story. When when I was 18, yeah, 18, and then I met him again when I was 19. Uh, when I was 18, I had adult pacifiers and things because I was into DJ G from a young age. And he saw it in my room, and he was like, oh, wear that while I fuck you.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And I was like, oh, I don't know, but sure, yeah, I'm young and naive and whatnot. Yeah. And then I moved, so I didn't see him for a while, and then I saw him uh where I moved to, and I was like, Oh, hey. And he was like, I'm gonna be in your area soon and whatnot. And he was like, Can you dress up as a six-year-old? Can you get girl magazines, yeah, uh six-year-old underwear? I'm like, you know, first off, I'm not gonna fit in that. Yeah, and then yeah, he wanted me to get all the clothes and things, and then he was like, I want you to get a happy birthday six badge. And I was like, sure, yeah. And and then I couldn't do it. Yeah, I just fucking couldn't. I got everything um ready, uh most of it. And then that like I I just couldn't I just could not bring myself. And I was like, sorry, I can't do this.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I don't think I gave him the money back because I think he knew what he was doing was wrong. Because it never came back up.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I mean just parted ways because it was that fucking weird.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I just no. So this is what I mean, where like I've got experience that maybe some other people haven't got, so I have a different outlook on totally how certain quote uncut kinks and things like I I I think possibly he wasn't all the kids and things, yeah. But you never know.
SPEAKER_01Um it's good that you have recognised like that's not something you're comfortable with, and have like good boundaries for that, like you're just like no, that's just not happening.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, there's so much I can do for money. But set of things I can just say no to. Yeah. Um, and thankfully these days I can, which is why I don't really think I'm prepared to do any adult baby sessions where it is sexual.
SPEAKER_01Totally.
SPEAKER_03Um and I'm sort of getting there with sissies and things just because of them wanting to be feminized and then called names.
SPEAKER_01I and that and that act in itself being humiliating.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, and dehumanitization of like women.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_03It it's a very difficult one, but yeah.
SPEAKER_01I think that one like easier in some ways just because like especially even just with the term sissy, like you can see where that has been like an experience people have had at a young age and why that's become like sexualized for them. Uh-huh. Like I don't know. I can just wrap my head around that a bit easier. Like I get it. But yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um, but yeah, Adult Baby. It all depends on what partic of of what the person wants. I mean, going back to my childhood watching Sec Cetra, yeah, there was two episodes, I think, or at least two people they interviewed for Adult Baby. Now, I wouldn't really say it was a great episode because the representation they showed, I don't want to say like it put it in a bit of a bad light.
SPEAKER_01They've like sensationalized it as media tends to do with things. Like they've made they've showed like the most extreme version of it that's like.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, like I'm sorry, but it was an unattractive, very big guy, who was sort of sucking on somebody's tip.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And so they showed like the sexualized version, but they showed it in very was this is that channel four? Sex etra. Well it's not on anymore.
SPEAKER_01But did it was Bravo. Was it Bravo or right? Just because like I don't know, looking back at like some of the old Channel 4 documentaries, like they just ripped the absolute piss at the people that are on there. Yeah. Like I feel like documentaries have come a long way in terms of like the ethics attached, and I feel like Sex Etra's probably in that same category as like back in the day where they like never really let the people know how they were gonna be shown.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah, absolutely, absolutely. Um, and I'm not saying that like the way the guy it was the way the guy was shown.
SPEAKER_01And how they spoke about him and stuff, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah, totally. Um but yeah, it it can be like I'm reading from Wikipedia, um, I think it is, yeah. And it says can be an expression of sexual fetish, or more accurately, um paraphilia, or simply a non-sexual form of recreational adult roleplay.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um but yeah, for my for me, it's just trauma healing, like stuffies and cuddles, hot chocolates, all that stuff.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, as people like reliving their childhoods in a safe way.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01When they maybe didn't get that when they were younger.
SPEAKER_03Exactly. So there's different, so many different forms of it, and I do think it still is, especially if you say to somebody, oh I like wearing diapers. I I think it definitely is something that like turn turns heads, and it does need to be said if you're like trying to get a relationship or something like that. Because well, I I think a lot of my clients as well know my stance on when it comes to relationships and actually like telling the truth of what you're into and things because it'll just eat a hole in you.
SPEAKER_01Oh, totally, it's so important. Like, I think it's so hard, like, not that I've really had to do it, but like dating will kinky because you've just got like more of a list of things that you have to be compatible with something for.
SPEAKER_03Absolutely, like, yeah, like that's what I'm doing right now. Where it's like, are you into DGLG? Do you have experience? Do you enjoy pet play? Do you have experience? Yeah, and it it's like a fucking needle in a haystack, basically, it's great. But yeah, that is one of the kinks um that I know about and that I enjoy, and people are very not necessarily open, but they they really want to know everything usually about it when you tell them that you're into a certain thing like this.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, like I feel like it's it's more of an unusual one. It's not like what comes to mind when you think kink.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Like I feel like on dates these days, people are just like, oh, you're into pegging then, or something more casual that has been normalized.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Because there's a lot in the mainstream these days, and I think it's totally fair to say that that like age play in general isn't one and still has like a lot of taboo attached to it, like even for us.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, because you'll get people who are just like, oh, do you enjoy fucking kids? Yeah. And things like that. Like, it's worse when you are a male, yeah, um, or male uh presenting, um, because they will just think you're a paedophile and things, and it's like it could be that, I'll be honest. It could be that, or like they just wanna relive their childhood or just just have a fucking better life or something. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Or they just feel like what we're talking about, like more comfortable in that kind of like caregiven role, yeah. Or care receiving role.
SPEAKER_03Exactly. Um whereas if like yeah, if vice versa, like not all of us want to fuck kids. It's like with like furries, because people get that, um they misinterpret that. Well, they're they're like, oh you like dressing up as animals, so you're like fucking them. And it's like I'm sure there's a portion of people that do like to fuck animals and the reality and things. Um, but not not all of them.
SPEAKER_01Are we gonna have to like depot this?
SPEAKER_03Maybe.
SPEAKER_01Um, but yeah. So I have got six um different fillers, which is like unusual kinks, basically. Okay as as a kind of medical term for it. Medical um because they used to be in the DSM, a lot of them. What's the DSM? It's I can't remember what the letters are for, but it's basically like the big book of all the mental illnesses.
SPEAKER_03Nice and a medical.
SPEAKER_01Um because like actual say domaschism's in there are still. Right. But they've changed it to say it's only a mental health condition if it's affecting your life negatively. Oh, or is it used to just be overall? So it's like it's it's getting better, it's still in there. Which I can kinda see if somebody's like seeking it out to an extent where they are getting like really harmed because of it.
SPEAKER_03Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01Um at least permanently and not in like a safe way. Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Um, but yeah. So I thought, we'll say the name and take a guess if you want. Some of them are easier than others.
SPEAKER_03Well, I wonder if that um counts for like serial killers and things. Um, being sadistic. Potentially, yeah. And and that's why they've kept that. If like it affects your livelihood. Because that's the only like extreme thing I can think of.
SPEAKER_01I feel like there's a difference between like sadism and like actually murdering people though. Do you know what I mean? Still cause them pain.
SPEAKER_03It is. Like there's that I'm sure there'll be like a chart.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, they're probably they're probably gonna all like lined out very precisely. Um cool, so the first one is stigmatophilia.
unknownStigmatophilia.
SPEAKER_03Is that like in tomatoes or something?
SPEAKER_01Um just to tell you. Yeah. So it's piercings and tattoos. Oh, yeah. So stig stigma is what's the kind of part of that um originally came from Latin to mean mark or brand, which is where like two tattoos came from. Um it's also where like the word stigma comes in.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I was about to say, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Which is what I was saying was really interesting when I looked it up before, because um it then became the word for like getting brandied, which obviously people did when they were like stealing or piracy or whatever back in the day, which is why stigma means shame or discredit, because it was like a marky shame that you got.
SPEAKER_03Oh fire!
SPEAKER_01Yeah, you don't yeah, I thought that was quite an easy one, but it's good. Um so what's another one? Hierophilia. This one's a wee bit higher. Like hieroglyphic.
SPEAKER_03Uh like being up high or something. Or water.
SPEAKER_01No, so it's like sacred or holy, so it's um like religious objects. Oh and I find this one really interesting because most of the the partial words tend to come through Latin. That's just like um the usual, but this actually comes from ancient Greek because people have been shagging religious objects for a very long time, enough that they had for a word for it back in ancient Greece. Nice. And it's like carried on for then.
SPEAKER_03So that's really interesting because um I I made a porno with Mila.
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Uh and she was um licking lacrosse and things, and oh my god, it was so good.
SPEAKER_01Um so for nephilia for nephilia.
SPEAKER_03Is it button with like touch or something?
unknownNo.
SPEAKER_01That's that's fair because it's a bit like fornication, like I can see where you've got there, but it's actually been made into like a piece of furniture.
SPEAKER_03Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_01I thought that was a good one. I didn't think it was necessarily like all that obvious, but like I don't know, it's always important. It's not something that I've ever like met anybody that's into that, yeah. I don't think.
SPEAKER_03If the sub comes over later, I'll I'll tell them to be a table for you. I love it. I mean, I would say I'm actually kind of into that because like I like to be of service, yeah.
SPEAKER_01That makes total sense. And so just like being like a lamp. Like that's the one that I was thinking.
SPEAKER_03Like fucking uncle Fester if you've seen the other fallings with the light bulb in the back. Like that's what happened all the closing on your life. No, no, I find the thought of like the um like being a table and him using me as like a plate or something like that and just eating the food off of like that does sounding and then have like the candles burning and things.
SPEAKER_01Like, that's my oldly feeding just in butt. Talk about burning the candle at both ends.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, it's like when people do the whole naked sushi eating off a person.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I kind of remember that was the periodic table, a kink thing that you had on your wall. And the dungeon had that on it. Because that was always one that I could like I can never remember the name, and I had to look up every time and I was like, oh yeah, it's that one.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_03I can't remember what that was. We oh, I should have just got it out of the storage and just put it there.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, oh, that could be a good cover for this.
SPEAKER_03I know.
SPEAKER_01Let me see. Oh, I don't know how to pronounce this. Nayota Imori is the name for it.
SPEAKER_03Interesting. Very interesting.
SPEAKER_01Um it originated between 1603 and 1868. Wow. That was cool.
SPEAKER_03Like being afraid of each other. That's funny.
SPEAKER_01Um so Terran Terratophilia?
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Uh like if you're trapped. No, it's monster fucking. Oh, okay. No, more obvious a lot of them aren't because they're like souls, which is hilarious. Like, ah, this is another ancient Greek one, so I mean you can put my inner name down for that as well.
unknownThat's fine.
SPEAKER_01Ah, filia just means love. So it's like everything love.
SPEAKER_03Oh god. Which makes total sense. That makes sense.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Um, and the last one is klismophilia. The clitomas. No, it's enemies. Oh. But klis is from ancient Greek and means flood. So it's like flood love.
SPEAKER_03Lol tsunami!
SPEAKER_01But yeah, that's that's my list. I just thought they were quite interesting. That's very good. Gerontopilia. Oh. Gerontotelia.
SPEAKER_00Gerontopilia.
SPEAKER_01Gerontophilia.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_03So apparently the first the the spelling on here is um Indonesian. Oh right, okay. Um and then when you translate it Gerontopilia. Gerontophilia.
SPEAKER_00Is it like a vampire?
SPEAKER_01No, I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_03Nope.
SPEAKER_01No, I'm not ugly. Go for it.
SPEAKER_03It's when a person is sexually attracted to elder people. Elders. Yeah. Oh right, okay. The elderly.
SPEAKER_01Gironto. Anyway, sorry. Gironto. That's all I think that's in my brains and didn't feel like that feels like an old people thing, you see.
unknownGeronimo.
SPEAKER_03Um for example, a 20-something year old woman might be attracted to a man in his late 40s. This isn't that kink. Um gerontophilias are attracted to people age 65 years or older.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03So I don't class it's like that. Um yeah, while not being part of or close to the age group.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Um this is like age gap plus elder edition.
SPEAKER_03So there is melilagnia. Melilagnia. Yep.
SPEAKER_00Like bloody legs.
SPEAKER_02No, I don't know.
SPEAKER_03Um that one is simply getting turned on by music. By music? Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Oh fair. I can see that.
SPEAKER_03I'm trying to think of what music I would get turned on by.
SPEAKER_01Um, I mean you can really like, I don't know, you can make anybody associate like anything with like being turned on if you like worked hard enough at it. So like I can see that.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, but is it just the music itself or is it does it come with acts say?
SPEAKER_01Or is it like individual songs? Or is it like individual genres of music or just like music in general? How fucking annoying would that be? You're just like walking down the street and like a that could be really inconvenient.
SPEAKER_03Justin Bieber starts like I'm in the mood now. But like yeah, I mean I can see like oh my god, that'd be so cute and like romantic in a way. If somebody just tries to seduce you and I've got music on and stuff like that, that's nice. But to just for me to just have music, I I can feel sexy, but I won't get turned on. I won't be able to like masturbate to it or something. Yeah, that's so interesting.
SPEAKER_01Uh so I say that that's the one you've came across then.
SPEAKER_03No.
SPEAKER_01No, no. In the wild.
unknownNo.
SPEAKER_03I mean, I could talk about um the session which I had recently, which was so there was no music.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And the guy wanted I don't know, I will need to look up the term into what it's actually called. Because it's not sploshing because it's not food, and it's not gunking because it's not gunk. But he basically wanted me to put a shower gel all over his head and face.
SPEAKER_01Was it like two in one or no shower gel? Just straight up like washing his hair.
SPEAKER_03And he he liked the feeling, he liked the AMSR, so like there was no music, yeah. It was just like the noise of the Yeah, the noise of my fingers on his hair. Yeah. And the shampoo, not the shampoo, because it wasn't even shampoo, shower gel. And he really enjoyed it. He loved like the sensations and things. Um and then I gave him a mouth soap in.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um, where you just put soap in somebody's mouth, and you you know, you can go as easy or hard as they preferably want.
SPEAKER_01Is that another one that's like more common with like older clients? I would say so. Because like that was up your thing focused today back in the day, folks swore and that it would be like, oh, wash your mouth out with the soap. I remember getting my mouth watched.
SPEAKER_03That happened to my dad, yeah.
SPEAKER_01That's like abuse.
unknownWhat the fuck?
SPEAKER_03Again, healing from trauma. Yeah. Like like that, like it was so common back in the day. So carcinogenic. That's so clean now. Erased mittens and all that stuff.
SPEAKER_01Now you're gonna have mooth cancer.
unknownNice.
SPEAKER_03Oh, I think I know what bar it was, it was the green bars because we used to always have the green bars of soap. So I think it was like olive or something like that. But that used to be a threatening thing, so I I would imagine it would be worse than the older generations as well, yeah. With actually getting their mouth washed out.
SPEAKER_01But if they had their mouth washed out with like an attractive woman or just like trauma, you like I'm not I don't know what to like feed into the stereotype, but I feel like especially with like fetishies over kinks, it always seems to come from childhood for the most part, yeah. Like there's always been like an experience of these. I feel like that with the music one as well. Like, I wonder if that's where that comes from with people where there's been like a certain song that's been playing when like the parents shagging or something. I don't know if it's that type of drama. Just like to steal a kid from a rose or something.
SPEAKER_03But yeah, um, yeah, that for for me, from my experience, the older gentlemans which I've had are like more into CP, which is corporate punishment.
SPEAKER_01So like the schoolmistress type, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Went into it punished, and then yeah, I mean this this gentleman, he was I want to say I want to say early 30s. Oh, so quite young now. Maybe maybe a bit older. Yeah. I'm not so sure. Um but no, he I I mean he he liked all the sensations and things, but it for for me the stereotype of all the gentlemen likes their mouth washed out and things is like real for me because that's the clientele, which I have seen that I get and things like that.
SPEAKER_01Um folk that were like still getting the belt in school, that type of age group. Yeah, I feel like all that time was like that just goes with that time in my head.
SPEAKER_03And even then with that stereotype, I don't see a lot of it because of how young I am.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um they would prefer somebody older, stricter looking, yeah. Looking like a teacher, I think. Um but yeah, what was my next one?
SPEAKER_01I I didn't realize like we'll definitely do an episode about this in the future, but like um a lot of the OG like dominatrixes were all called like governess because they were like school mistresses. That was like the beginning of like people paying for like corporal punishment and like BDSM and stuff like that. The beginning of it, so it makes sense that it's still so heavily prevalent now. It's like kind of like the origins of where things get to start.
SPEAKER_03I know that m some mistresses do go by that and I definitely am aware that some mistresses don't know that and don't know the origin of it. Um and they just go by the term mistress or something.
SPEAKER_01It was like people recreating their school experience basically. That's like I I feel I find it quite interesting that like it feels like people back in the Victorian times were like more aware of that and more comfortable than what people now.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, like they just fully went in on it, they were like, this is what sells, this is what the Victorian era, they were having freesums and everything, and people were watching exhibition lists and all sorts, like they were they were so more out there once.
SPEAKER_01But like the table legs needed to be covered. Oh I think this is maybe why people were like like having to keep up such a higher level of appearances day to day that they when they were letting loose, they were really lit and loose.
SPEAKER_03There was there was a king or something like that who had something made so he could have sex more than was it Henry Days?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I'm sure it was like the big chair, so he could like lie down in it.
SPEAKER_03Maybe, but I'm thinking of somebody else. Alright, okay. They might have been French, maybe I'm not too sure. But they they made something and um they could just have sex more easily in like different positions or something like that. Um but yeah, all kink, sex, all that stuff, I feel like very back in the day was not necessarily more accepted, but it was more out there, yeah. Um whereas these days sadly it's not.
SPEAKER_01Um maybe in some circles.
SPEAKER_03I mean, I already shocked people enough when I'm just like I'm into DJG, Petplay, oh, and this is also my job.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_03Um so yeah, we have this over kink, which is great.
SPEAKER_01No, mommy brain's still broken.
SPEAKER_03Hands.
SPEAKER_01Oh, that's a good one.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I mean, I I appreciate nice hands. Yeah. Um yeah, they can be attracted to fingers, manicures, someone smoking.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um, and yeah, they just think hands are sexy basically. Do you ever have like hand worshiping sessions? Is that something that you've done before? I think there's an aspect of it. Uh-huh. Because people do like to kiss hands.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. And when they're always put your nails like next to it.
SPEAKER_03This is why I always have my nails done, because it's just one of those things where you need to look good, yeah, in a way. You you'll like this one.
SPEAKER_01I'm worried now. You look out in me.
SPEAKER_03No, not in that way. Maybe I could get down with this.
SPEAKER_00Spectrophilia.
SPEAKER_01Spectrophilia. I mean that's gonna be ghosts, isn't it?
SPEAKER_00Oh yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03So sexual attraction relationships or sexual encounters with ghosts um who come and have hot sex with them at night.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. I feel like that would be terrifying. I mean, I I would be very concerned. Uh oh, I would think if it was um the fucking piranha uh lizards. Yeah. Just going back to the episode uh previous episodes. Just like, oh that's what we are because you wouldn't be able to see them in it.
SPEAKER_01Like it would just be like, oh right, okay, what's happening?
SPEAKER_03Exactly. Oh god, I would I I I need to know what they look like.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Ellie, what if they're really ugly?
SPEAKER_03Exactly. Like, I don't know. Um because now whenever I think about ghosts, I think about that um I think about scary movie. Uh-huh. Because there is um that scene where she has sex with the ghosts. Fair.
unknownFair.
SPEAKER_01You can see them though, can you? They're kind of like an outline in the scary movie.
SPEAKER_03Uh yes.
SPEAKER_01Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_03But I think in that specific scene, not that I've watched it, but like you can't see him.
SPEAKER_01Oh right, okay. It's been so long if I've seen the first one.
SPEAKER_03But I'm pretty sure it's mixed with like SA.
SPEAKER_01Uh-huh. And like she's like grabbing them. She's like, get over here. Like he's just trying to get away from her.
SPEAKER_03Uh I don't I can't remember now.
SPEAKER_01Maybe I think he tries to like sneak up on her at the start, and then like she's like, oh hell no, and like he's trying to like get away from her, and she's like grabbing them, like dragging them back into the pit or something. I'm sure that's what it's like.
SPEAKER_03BSK movie. There is this one.
SPEAKER_00Stigophilia. Stigiophilia. Stigophilia.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. No, don't know.
SPEAKER_03The sexual pleasure from the idea of going to hell.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I've never heard of that before.
SPEAKER_03Oh facing eternal punishment. Yeah. I mean, I've just lived fucking three years with eternal punishments. I don't know what they didn't get me off. I wonder where the stingy comes from. Um I don't know actually. Because it says it's English.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_03The actual word. How do you spell it? S T Y G I O Philion.
SPEAKER_01Ah, there's another Greek one. So the Greek god Stix ruled over the underworld. Or ruled over one of the rivers, sorry, of the underworld. Ah. So it's like Stixio. Like it Phil. It goes. I mean fair.
SPEAKER_03So there's this one. Just more religious.
SPEAKER_00Trichophilia.
SPEAKER_03Trichophilia.
unknownTrichophilia.
SPEAKER_01Is that number 13? No, that's Trisc Triscelia number seven. I don't know.
SPEAKER_03Hair.
SPEAKER_01Hair? Yeah. Like eating it or just just that in general. Sorry, I don't know what that's move our brain with.
SPEAKER_03So it can involve touching, smelling, looking, wearing other people's hair.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Or interacting with hair in different states, for example, when it is wet, cut, or plucked.
SPEAKER_01Oh wet hair. No thanks.
SPEAKER_03It can even involve eating hair.
SPEAKER_01I'm sure I've heard of that before.
SPEAKER_03That was why I mean people eat drywall and everything. Yeah. Um. Interesting. Yeah. And then of course they have preferences of like if they're like um curls or short hair or red. That's so interesting. Yeah. There is um a guy, I I mentioned it to you previously, um, who has been wanting to chop my hair off. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because he likes uh shaving hair and things.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um there was a guy who sadly the meat didn't happen because he wanted me to get a very retro hair dryer and he wanted me to do his hair. Oh. I think I think it was his hair or my hair, I'm not too sure. But I've came across that a good few times. Yeah, people wanting to touch my hair or me to touch their hair or do something in some instance.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Um I mean like hair is like decorative, isn't it? Like it is like a like a sexual attribute kind of thing.
SPEAKER_03Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Like people are attracted to like bold men.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, like it makes total sense. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Like so let's see if we can get this one. Or if any of our listeners get this one. Because you've better been playing the game of like what is the game?
SPEAKER_01So we have There's so much Greek in here, this is why I'm Europhilia. Europhilia.
SPEAKER_03It's obvious when um I'll say it. Euro.
SPEAKER_01Europhilia.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Like European people. You just sniff them out. I don't know, people like people of different nationalities and stuff. Americans pure think Europe's one country, so and it's them making up half these names. I know. Even uh I have no idea, I kind of think. Money? Urine. Urine aww. Yeah. Um like urology. Because I was thinking, what's urology? Like in my head that was good, that's a thing. Because that's like the study of urine. Oh yeah. Because it comes for the same like words, but I just couldn't remember what it was at all there. That was when they used to like taste people's pea to find out what was wrong with them. Oh yeah. It worked. It worked. Because when people have got diabetes, their pea is really sweet. There's loads of Oh yeah, yeah, like the cum sweet as well.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01That was a party trick of one of the guys who I used to say. But diagnosing people with diabetes.
SPEAKER_03No, I know it was like a comes sweet, you're gonna love it.
SPEAKER_01That's fine. Yeah. Yeah. Like it is sweet. Like sweet and salty popcorn. Don't be jealous.
SPEAKER_03But yeah, it's a fancy name for water sports. Yeah. Um they just find it sexy arousing, and it's it's one of the things which I do often in my sessions, whether it's a person drinking it or going over pissing over the cock or their face or something like that.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I feel like that's one that like still feels unaccepted, but like is really common. Like I don't get why there's still such a hang up about it.
SPEAKER_03I I'm reading this here, and it's like, if you don't remember the reports of that unverified dossier, a alleging that former President Donald Trump engaged in the act, a golden shower.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And I was just like, that's that's pretty random to do that. Okay.
SPEAKER_01And there was a whole late big scandal about it because he was like paying Russian Russian prostitutes to like peel him. Like multiple things came up with like multiple Nazis came forward about it, I'm sure.
SPEAKER_03I mean, I mean, I I'd yeah, I'd add quite happily. I mean, does it count if somebody enjoy it? Like it's not that's a good point. No, this is where he lays down and I just do it next to him.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, miss. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um, this is a good one. I can probably say this one, but I want to make sure that I'm actually doing it right. So we have V.
SPEAKER_00Carfilia.
SPEAKER_03V. Carfilia.
SPEAKER_00V. Carphilia.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. It does not sound like what it's to do with. It's not to do with like Vicar.
SPEAKER_01No. I'm sure there's something with that. Oh, definitely. I have not a clue. You've you've you've already told me I'm not gonna get it, so unless if it's like vicarious, then it's like living through someone else, or is it like getting turned on by turning other people on? Ooh, okay.
SPEAKER_03Did I get it right? So Vicarphilia is vicorous arousal. Vicarious, uh Vicarious, that's the word. A kink where individuals are intensely aroused by hearing the sexual encounters. Uh sexual experiences, sorry, interests and behaviours of others. Yeah. Namely those who live different or usually more fully in lives than their own. That's an interesting one.
SPEAKER_01It's a wee bit different to what I was thinking, but yeah, cool.
SPEAKER_03This could be experienced by listening to a famous musician exac uh explain their sexual history on a podcast, for example, or perhaps by reading a writer's recount of their first erotic experience.
SPEAKER_01So basically anybody that's wanked to this podcast has that kink. Basically, yeah.
SPEAKER_03I mean I'm trying to think if I have that.
SPEAKER_01I mean, is that not just like I don't know, like story form?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Like, do you know what I mean? Like what like is that not everybody? But I think what that I think because it's the vica the vicarious bit is when they are doing more like when it's impressive to you.
SPEAKER_03Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_01So like or doing something you're not able to do. So I think that's where it's a wee bit different. So it's maybe like more something that would be a fantasy for you, yeah rather than something you've done. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Sound though still important. Like if it's something I don't know. I don't know. That's the hard one.
SPEAKER_03I mean I don't read in general. I don't read um an autobiography and expect to like wank off to all something.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. But maybe if that maybe it's about like you idolising that person, which is why they're talking about like a rock star or whatever. So like if it's somebody that you really look up to and you find it's thrilling and like sexually excited to hear about their sex life because they're living a life that you can't or to- Does it have to sound thrilling?
SPEAKER_03I think so. I think that's the like do they have to go in detail? Because who these days goes in detail about like their sex life in an autobiography? Which is why I'm like, ooh, what if they just mentioned that like what if they had sex when they were like 15 or 13 or something and that's in the book? Would they get turned on by that?
SPEAKER_01I feel like that's a whole other like it's their first sexual encounter.
SPEAKER_02Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_03And again, a lot of people get their first sexual encounters when they're younger, or like have a glimpse of like a kink and things. Yeah, I realised that I didn't actually explain what sploshing was. Oh yeah, yeah. So sploshing is food play. It's very I enjoy it.
SPEAKER_01Is it almost foods? Can you not do like mud and stuff with sploshing? I thought it was just like anything. Sorry. Just double check. Because I heard you mention Gungeon, which I've not heard as a separate thing to splosh in before. I thought they were just like the same thing.
SPEAKER_03Um no, I I see them as different. So there is an umbrella term called wet and messy.
SPEAKER_01Uh I didn't really cool. I think I've swapped Sploshion for just wet and messy in my head. Like I thought sploshing was an umbrella term for everything.
SPEAKER_03I don't believe so.
SPEAKER_01Cool, cool.
SPEAKER_03I believe sploshing is oh it's so cute. I tell you sploshing and the like third thing that comes up is splosh muffin. Oh um yeah. So let me see. I I I do believe it is gratification from interacting with food or watching others do the same. Cool. Um, which is why I was like, I don't know exactly what to call the hair, uh the shower gel and things, because it's not splotting, it's not food.
SPEAKER_01Is it even wet and messy? Because it is it was it about if it was about like the sensation and stuff of just being washed, is that not like do you know like it's not getting covered in something you wouldn't normally get covered in? Where it is with like sploshing and gungeon and like that's like an experience that you wouldn't have with that.
SPEAKER_03I think possibly for him because he was travelling, um, it was easy for him to pick them up at the shops because he didn't take them away. There was a bit left over. So, and the pictures that he sent me were like people properly foamed up in foam and shadow things.
SPEAKER_01Umgeon then, kind of. Yeah, that's the closest thing. Oh, do you think like people into that would get turned on in like a foam party scenario then?
SPEAKER_02Most likely.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, because it's still like getting all covered with foam and stuff in it.
SPEAKER_03You're feeling it, you're seeing other people do it.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, people sliding a boot in it and stuff, like we we chased after the lads as well.
SPEAKER_03I'm trying to find um if there is actually any porn with shower gel. Um that's one watching a woman shower.
SPEAKER_02Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_03That that's got shower gel in it.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um my god, could you imagine getting turned on by the adverts on TV? Oh, that'd be fucking hell. I wouldn't be able to do that. Oh yeah, Davina McCall. Get that hair all. Oh no.
SPEAKER_01Imagine you ended up with like a fetish that was like so specific that you could just never get it like you specifically want to eat Davina McCall's hair.
SPEAKER_03Did we press record? Um, but yeah, I think yeah, I don't know what I don't think that really that has a name apart from just wet and messy.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um. Yeah, because like that comes under like cakes sitting um jello. Yeah. Jelly. But yeah. Lots and lots of new cakes. Lots of new cakes.
SPEAKER_01Some I haven't even heard of before, so good job.
SPEAKER_03I know it's very interesting how there's a lot of like religious and like hell and things.
SPEAKER_01Well, it like I don't know, it's there's that thing where like fetishies come out of things that you got scared by as a kid, and like religion's fucking terrifying. So it makes sense that there's so many of them. Like people have literally had the fear of God put in them. So like yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um but yeah, this has been the episode. I hope you've enjoyed.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03You can find us on Dark Fans, Spotify, Apple, everything.
SPEAKER_01Or on our website as well.
SPEAKER_03Or on our website, yeah. Which is behind the paddle.co.uk. Yeah, and if you do want to support us, that would be great. Yeah. But yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, as always, there's a 10% discount code for you guys at sanctuaryofsin.com. If you put behind the paddle in a checkout, you'll get a discount off.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, wonderful. Okay. This has been Behind the Paddle. Thanks for listening. Yeah, bye. Bye.
