Love From the Inside Out: Real Life Conversations for Women Going Through Midlife, Menopause Body Changes and Identity Shifts

Why I Didn't Change My Last Name After Marriage

Susan Kricun, Midlife Reinvention, Relationships and Boundaries Guide Season 2 Episode 24

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0:00 | 14:28

What happens when the thing you imagined your whole life finally arrives... and it doesn't feel the way you expected?

For most of my life, I assumed I would change my last name when I got married. I actually looked forward to it. Growing up with a difficult-to-pronounce last name, I dreamed of the day I would take a simpler name and step into what I thought would be an easier identity.

But when I got married for the first time at 52, something unexpected happened.

The name I had spent years wanting to leave behind had become part of who I was.

In this episode of Love From the Inside Out, I’m sharing the story behind why I didn’t change my last name after marriage and why that decision became about much more than paperwork.

I talk about family expectations, growing up with the belief that marriage was the ultimate goal, what it means to get married later in life, and how keeping my maiden name became connected to identity, independence, family history, and belonging.

Whether you changed your name, kept your name, reclaimed your maiden name after divorce, never married, or are still figuring out what parts of your identity truly belong to you, this episode is really about one question:

How do we love deeply without losing ourselves in the process?

In this episode, I talk about:

• Why I chose not to change my last name after marriage
• What came up for me around keeping my maiden name
• Getting married for the first time at 52
• Family expectations around marriage, motherhood, and identity
• Why names can feel so emotional for women
• What it means to belong to someone without losing yourself

Referenced in this episode:

Strangers: A Memoir of Marriage by Belle Burden
• Related episode: “I Tried Every Dating App - What Actually Worked: Self-Love, Boundaries & Message Scripts” 

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🎶 Music Credit:
“Seize the Day” by Andrey Rossi, via #Uppbeat (uppbeat.io/t/andrey-rossi/seize-the-day)

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