Peach Podcast
Two guys and an occasional guest breaking open topics on: Purpose, Energy, Attitude, Commitment and Health through shared experiences.
Peach Podcast
EP029: From Struggles to Strength to Finding Your Purpose!
This episode of the Peach Podcast brings you an engaging conversation with a true brother from another mother, Bob Bullard, who shares his transformative journey from mischief to meaning!
Together with Bob, we explore the depth of purpose found in childhood memories and neighborhood bonds, and how those experiences shape one's journey to sobriety. Bob candidly reflects on his 15-year sobriety path, offering insights into the struggles and triumphs he faced while embracing a life of purpose and self-improvement. This conversation offers a raw and sincere look at the challenges of overcoming alcohol addiction and the perseverance required to stay on this transformative journey. Join us as we discuss the powerful impact of making purposeful choices and the ongoing journey toward self-betterment and living in on purpose and in your purpose!
Hey, hey, hey. Welcome to the Peach Podcast. Just a couple of dudes and an occasional guest breaking open topics from everyday life on purpose, energy, attitude, commitment and health. So, if you're ready, listen in as we live to learn from our losses, gain from our gratitude and laugh as we level up. To learn from our losses, gain from our gratitude and laugh as we level up. Always remember, if you ever feel stuck, all you got to do is just start.
Speaker 2:Come on, let's go. Welcome back to Peach Podcast with Doug and Daryl man. We have a great and amazing guest. You know what this guest is, not just your everyday guest. This guest is like he is my brother from another mother period End of story. When you hear that saying my brother from another mother, this is exactly who this person is. If you looked it up in a dictionary, you would see this person's face, this person's name, this person's life. We shared a lot of history together and some incredible moments, man. Some of them we may or may not share on this podcast, but we'll see. So it's all good, but before we get into our guests and tell you who it is, daryl man, I want to just pause for a second brother.
Speaker 2:I have been watching you on Strava and I was over your house last week. We did some painting together and got able to Ava Jo's room already and all that stuff. That was a lot of fun. But you were telling me about this one routine you started doing, but then I saw you do this other routine on Strava the other day and you did 600 sets or something like that. And so how many rounds is that? Tell me a little bit about that and why are you doing that man that it was like intense, but at the same time I'm like dude. That's badass.
Speaker 3:I gotta talk to him about that yeah, thanks, doug, and uh, very excited, uh, for our guests. I'll tell you a little bit about it. You know, social media is a really good thing. Sometimes you see these little clips and saw this little clip and you see these things. Sometimes you, we do a boxing, these little simple challenges, right? So there was a simple challenge. It says it was a 250 push-up challenge and that's a lot of push-ups, but you go and you just do push-ups as many as you can. Maybe you knock out 30 or 40. And when you're done with that set, you go do five deadlifts and you go back and you do that and you know I did that, and back and you do that. And, um, you know I did that and I talked to my friend, david, right down the street. We did it at the Anatolia clubhouse and I'll tell you what. Uh, it was about a 22 minute workout and, man, our hearts were pumping and we felt good and we were at the clubhouse and it was really cool. It was very simple, right there. So two ended up being about 250, uh, pushups and probably about 50 to 60 different deadlifts, very excited.
Speaker 3:Two days later he texts me and he's like I have not been this sore in years and David's a pretty, pretty, pretty athletic guy, yeah. And then he said, hey, we need to work in something else. So we met this morning again and we started in the gym and he says what are we doing? Let's go outside. It's seven in the morning. So we actually did an outdoor workout. I sent you a video and we incorporated body weight squats 30 body weight squats, 20 pushups, 10 deadlifts, 10 rounds, did it in right under 30 minutes.
Speaker 3:I tell you, doug, it was nice to be outside. The sun came up about 720 and we were outdoor and all we had was a little bit of weights, our body and just knocking it out. And it was cool. It was cool. So I really liked it. It was something different. I'll see if I can get up and walk tomorrow, but it was something different. And you know, doug, I think there is something about health. You know, outdoors we love that a lot. Sometimes, right now the winter time, I'm in the gym a lot, right, and everything else. It was great to be outside. It was great to try something new. So I'm really encouraged that we committed that once a week we're going to try to do an outdoor workout of something like this.
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, I got to give you a huge shout out because not only do you scare me, uh, and intimidate me with your workout routines, but you also inspire me because, man, it'll be freaking 10, 11 o'clock at night and I know you had a slam day at work and then working with the family doing stuff. Then, all of a sudden, I see a post on Strava you know, 10 o'clock at night and like, got my shoulder workout or my root. You have this other routine and I'm like this guy, man, it's okay to rest sometimes, daryl. So so, yeah, you are inspiring, but sometimes it's like gosh, dang it. You know, I think, uh, I have that disease where I've just, you know, comparative reality, man, man, I need to be like Daryl, but I I've been working on that, just trying to stay in my own lane.
Speaker 2:But speaking of exercise, our guest man, I remember when he started his health, he had a health, he was on a health journey, man, and he had a few pounds to lose and I'll tell you what he'll tell us in, probably in a few minutes or part of his story. But this guy, he walks like every freaking day and he brings his dogs along with him and he does it with a smile and shares love and meets new people and has conversation. It's really awesome. So, daryl, why don't you go ahead and kick it off and get our guest started here.
Speaker 3:Sure Well, I know that you and Bob grew up together. Of course, bob is much more handsome and younger than you.
Speaker 2:Doug, oh, that's a lie. Hey, we don't lie on Peach Podcast Daryl.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and I agree with you. I love you know, all of a sudden you look on Facebook and not just going for a walk, going for a walk in the city, san Francisco, some beautiful scenery behind him and he's out there crushing a walk in San Francisco with his dog. So first of all, welcome, bob to the Peach Podcast, thrilled that you could join us. I know you and Doug know each other very, very well. But overall, just tell us a little bit about yourself.
Speaker 4:Well, first of all, thanks for having me on here today. Guys, I'm a listener. I listen to Peach Podcast every week and I look forward to the drop. And when Doug called me, I was like heck, yeah, I'm a member of the tribe. I mean, I don't have a jersey or something like that, but I feel like I'm a second cousin of a peach.
Speaker 2:You're apricot? No, I'm just kidding.
Speaker 4:Tell me, tell you a little bit about myself. Well, I'm a fourth generation from the same house in San Francisco, from a small neighborhood on the east side of the city, patrero Hill, and that's where my connection with Doug and his entire family come together is Patrero Hill because his father and a bunch of other relatives we all grew up in that neighborhood, great neighborhood to grow up in. I'm currently I'm married, I have I've been married for 33 years to my beautiful wife, nancy, and, uh, I have a awesome 27 year old son, dylan. And I have two four legged babies, uh, bella and Rocky as well, that are a big part of my life.
Speaker 2:Very cool man, very cool. So, bob, um, thank you. And, by the way, bob's last name, for those of you who don't know, is Bullard, bob Bullard. And Bob Bullard has a brother, joe Bullard JB. Just in case you're listening in, man, I'm throwing you a shout out brother, Come on. But Bob.
Speaker 2:So we wanted the PEACH is an acronym, as you know, you've heard, but for some new listeners or listeners just to be reminded, the acronym PEACH stands for Purpose, energy, attitude, commitment and Health. And I know Daryl and I we're very physical and we do a lot of exercises and riding and running and stuff together and talking about working out and whatnot. But, man, I remember talking to you last week or a few days ago or whatever, and you were talking about your purpose and we're going to get to your purpose in a little bit here, but today our episode is going to really kind of pinpoint purpose. We want to really drive into purpose. But your purpose, bob, before we get to it came through a lot of stories, man, a lot of stories. What was it like for you growing up and how did that kind of unfold? Tell us a little bit about that.
Speaker 4:Well, in my neighborhood that I grew up in, it was a small neighborhood and we were very tight, and I come from a group of young kids that were raised by women. There wasn't a lot of male father figures in our lives when we were young, and so we called a lot of the shots when we were growing up and, uh, so we, we called a lot of the shots when we were growing up. They weren't always the best calls, right, you know, during that period, because our role models were the older guys from the neighborhood, you know so what?
Speaker 3:hey, let me ask you doug, both of you. I never even heard of patrol hill before I met josephine, and it seemed like you guys own that area. I mean, uh, and I've been back there with chief, you know I've, you know I've been married. We've been married for almost 15 years. I've been back there, like you guys know, every inch, every block, every house, every corner store, every bar, everything there. That sounded like a pretty tight neighborhood. It sounded pretty cool. I'm sure you got into a little bit of trouble there, but what was it like? What was Patrillo Hill like, patrol hill like?
Speaker 4:for maybe the listeners that don't know, yeah, growing up on patrol hill it was like we knew everybody on every street that, every house that they lived in. We knew all the store owners, we knew the mailman, the milkman, all those people you know we were. It was a tight knit and you know, believe it or not, it was a small neighborhood but we had, you know, lower side patrol hill, upper side patrol hill, the projects, you know, when we all came together in the middle. But it was fun. We had a good time growing up in the city, I mean prior to Adelaide. You know, teenage years. We did what everyone else does. We adventured and we played war on an entire block. We'd hop over people's backyards and hide from each other and stuff like that and we just got into normal kid stuff, you know.
Speaker 2:War, Remember war? That was amazing. I can't Gosh man. We would like beat each other up because we were playing war.
Speaker 4:Oh my, goodness, we had BB guns and we used to wear heavy jackets, so we didn't get. We really, oh my goodness.
Speaker 2:We had BB guns and we used to wear heavy jackets so we didn't get. We really went to war. That was funny. I know you and my brother, big brother Joe, did a lot of things, a lot of crazy stuff, got in a lot of trouble and, you know, kind of laid the foundation and paved the way for me and my younger brother and the younger kids, you know just to be little hellions and you know. But I know a lot of those little hellions today and they're beautiful men and women who have great life memories that have led them into a place of peace, a place of purpose, a place of love and acceptance and growth. What are some of the defining moments in your life that had you shift from that life of being like a little hellion to you know, just starting your direction, starting to change course? What are some of the things that happened to you or you went through when that happened?
Speaker 4:That's a great question and it's easy to answer. The starting point was you know, growing up the way I did, alcohol was a big part of our lives. Growing up, you know, there came a point in my life where I needed, I wasn't in control anymore and I needed to make a change. So I made a healthy decision to, you know, stop drinking and learn how to live that way. So I think that was the biggest turning point for me, big, scary turning point. You know, when you have that love for so many years and then you take it away, it's just like now.
Speaker 2:How do I do this? Right right, what were some of the big obstacles in your mind when you took the, if you can recall, because how long have you been clean and sober? 15 years now. 15 congratulations, brother.
Speaker 4:That's badass I I 15 years this time. I had seven and a half years at the first time. I uh ventured into sobriety, but I thought I had it all understood and I was really wrong.
Speaker 2:Yeah but thank you for sharing that man. What, what a great testament of like just don't quit, just don't quit, man. And I think too many of us have this mindset of perfectionism that if you mess up you got to throw the baby out with the bathwater. And you don't. You just got to. You know, you might have a season of trying to get your shit together and saying, okay, let's get back at it. But you got back at it. And now you got 15 solid years, man. And let's get back at it. But you got back at it. And now you got 15 solid years, man. And even in the first seven years where I thought they were awesome. But you know, these last 15 are just outstanding, man. They just watching your life, seeing who you've become and the things you do now that are your priorities in life. It's just absolutely beautiful to see. But I love that.
Speaker 2:You just shared, first you, you did seven, then you did 15. So people listen in. That's a huge clue to life, man, just don't quit, don't stop, Don't give up on yourself because it's there. But if you can go back, bob, here you are 15 years right and even go back to your first seven years when you first went into sobriety. What was? What were some of the mental obstacles that you were most afraid of or most scared of or you know confronting? If you can remember back that far, if you don't at school, I understand.
Speaker 4:No, I mean, it's very vivid to me. My fears were real. I documented them, learning just to be comfortable in my own skin and in a group environment. You know I, learning just to be comfortable in my own skin and a group environment. You know I. My confidence level was low because I always used alcohol to lift my confidence when I was in social situations. You know I had to learn that skillset and I had to learn to be able to listen Also, just sit there and be quiet. You know you learn so much when you're quiet and listening to others talk.
Speaker 2:You know, there may be people who are listening to this podcast on this particular episode, who may be contemplating or struggling with the idea that maybe they have a problem with alcohol, and first thing I want to tell them is man, don't beat yourself up. Man, be kind to yourself, give yourself grace and love. And it is a scary decision, but, bob, if you were to encourage someone to take that step, what would you say to them?
Speaker 4:I would say to them if you want a life better than you could ever imagine, then consider taking this step and giving yourself this gift of sobriety, because it's a gift that keeps on giving.
Speaker 2:Yeah, variety, because it's a gift that keeps on giving. Yeah, and you know, unfortunately, today we live in a world where we're just filled with immediate gratification. You know we want shit now. Like you go on social media, you can press a button and have a friend. That's how quick it is. Or you think you've got a friend right and if they accept your friendship, you're like. You know it's like, oh my gosh, they accept my friendship. So we're being trained to really chase immediate gratification. So I want to keep it real. I want to give people real information, raw information, and somebody with your journey and your past. How long did it take for you to really start peeling off some layers and making some transitions and to be okay with who you were without alcohol? Do you remember how long that process took?
Speaker 4:I tell you when I, uh, when I hit the one year mark, I and I, the amount of work that I did on myself in that first year, right, I really, I really felt some peace. That convention in between my ears quieted.
Speaker 3:You know, bob, I'll, you know, overall, first of all, congratulations. You know, 15 years, 22 combined, I think. As you know, I just I celebrated one year back in September, just huge, huge, and I remember I was kind of listening and you know relating, you know I wrote three things down, you know, a long time ago slow down, shut up and do the next right thing. And you, you mentioned just, you know the just, you know kind of learning just to be quiet, learning to listen, learning to kind of understand yourself, right.
Speaker 3:And you know, when I looked, probably six months ago, when I kind of looked around and I've talked to Doug and we had an award for this year, it's just how to find peace, right, and it is take a lot of learning and I think sometimes for me, I think the overall stopping drinking was one thing, but figuring out how to kind of get to know myself and to kind of find that peace. And it's not a one-year journey, right, bob, it is kind of a lifetime journey. But those are three things and I'm sure you can relate to that. But definitely just not feeling like you have to be the center of attention, right, that you can listen more, and I know that I still need to work on that, but I think it's made me a better person. I know that it's quieted. Like you said, quieted the thoughts in my mind.
Speaker 4:That's a blessing in itself, right there, when you're someone who is troubled with a drinking problem. When you first stop drinking, there's a lot of voices in your head and they're not coaching you to take that road to recovery.
Speaker 1:Let me tell you that oh man.
Speaker 2:So, Bob, you said something and I think a lot of times in interviews that I've heard it gets glossed over. I hear people respond like it took a lot of work. It took a lot of work, and so tell me, pick out three. If you could pick out three of the most important things that you did in your first three years of recovery that you would call work, what were those things?
Speaker 4:To keep it real, I worked the entire 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. That was a lot of work. Yeah, you know that was a very lot of work. Yeah, you know that was a very lot of work. You, you address your fears and sexual inventory and uh, just all kinds of things that you're, you put in front of you and and you work through it and with, uh, with another person, your sponsor, and uh, that was a lot of work. It was very scary. They say you're supposed to do it fearful and moral inventory. I don't know anyone that's ever done a fearful I mean a fearless moral inventory. You know it's only been fearful.
Speaker 2:Right, right. And what about? You know, I work with a lot of people in recovery as well who want to get healthy, and so and I love working with them. You can tell the people who work a really strong program because it fits their system, Like, hey, you guide me and I'm going to do what you tell me and it's all good. There's this concept of going to meetings every day. How do you feel about that? Is that something you applied to your life?
Speaker 4:I highly recommend it, especially for people that are early on in sobriety, so they can develop that repetition and meeting like-minded people You'll find when you're learning to not drink, it's nice to be able to bounce things off of others that are on the same journey as you. Right, and at the time when I quit drinking, most of my friends were drinkers. So I found those people and it just strengthened my ability and my sobriety to be able to talk to them about my fears, right, about what am I going to do on the first 4th of July? What am I going to do at my cousin's wedding, you know, my first Christmas, all those things.
Speaker 2:Damn, that's awesome that. And that leads me to sponsors, right? A sponsor is somebody who has gone before you and guides you through the steps and kind of, and is there for you as somebody, to mentor you and listen to you when you're feeling confused about situations, circumstances or people and all that stuff. How scary was that for you to reach out to another human being, another guy, a guy reaching out to another guy to ask for help.
Speaker 4:Well, fortunately for me and I hope that's the same for many others I didn't have to ask. I was asked if I had a sponsor and I said no, and my sponsor said well, I'm your sponsor.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:I think, I knew what you needed, man the last four to five years is we've kind of got to know each other and created a good group of people, just having like-minded people, having a community that you can talk to, right, you know, bob, you hear you listen to the Peach Podcast Half the time. We go on rides. The best part of the rides is the conversation and just talking to each other, right, and I really found in a lot of and Doug talks about this guys are really bad at that, right, and you know, when you know, one of the things for me is like, hey, what am I going to do with my friends when I'm not drinking? Do you know what I mean? We have to have conversations about things maybe other than sports and everything else.
Speaker 3:And I think, doug, wouldn't you say I think the community that we've created and just exercising like-minded people, if it's drinking, if it's exercising, you need that community. It's a huge part of like I know it's a big part of what I think has helped me, um, but but just wanted to. You know I it doesn't matter if I think it's recovery or exercise or health. Having a good community is critical in life.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely Amen to that. Amen is amen on his amen to your amen. Sure, hey Bob, one last question on your recovery and then we'll move on to some other. Sure, hey Bob, one last question on your recovery and then we'll move on to some other topics, because I think this is a big one for a lot of people. They walk into those doors, they're ready to make a change, their palms are sweating, they're going to get a sponsor, they're going to a meeting, they're feeling all the guilt and shame and again, maybe this isn't everyone's experience, but in most people I talk with who've gone down this road, these are some of the symptoms I hear that come out from making this decision and they. One of the things they worry about is you know how they're going to be viewed, how people are going to judge them, that they can't you know who's going to want to hang out with them?
Speaker 2:Tell us a little bit about your circle today. Like, do you feel judged? Do you hang out with people who are not alcoholics? Do you? What are your friends like? So tell us what really happens when you say yes to yourself and you're willing to do the work. What's really the result? Repeat that last part right there. So tell us about when you say yes and you're willing to do all the work and you go through the work. Yeah Right, what really happens in the work and you go through the work. Yeah Right, what really happens in the relationships around you.
Speaker 4:Oh, they just like they're, they flourish. You know, I mean the relationships that I have today with, uh, non-drinking people. Drinking people, I mean all kinds of people I talk to and and I get gifts from each one of them in various ways. Right.
Speaker 3:Bob, let me ask you, let me add on to that I think you know there's a perception in your mind, right, with this guilt and this perception, I think so much of it is in your mind. I know that, talking to Josephine about this, she's like 90% of it is within you, right? I would just, you know, echo that right, the amount of people that have just reached out to me proactively and says good for you, congratulations, how can I help? It's a combination of it doesn't matter if you drink, you don't drink or anything else. My relationships have got better. Some of them have, you know, probably diminished a bit, but, doug, to be honest with you, right, depending on the circumstances and that, but the core group of people, you know, bob, that that I know. The relationships have flourished and it doesn't matter if they're drinking or non drinking, because I think I'm just a better version of myself, right, bob, if you're a better version of yourself, you're going to have better friendships.
Speaker 4:You're going to have better relationships, absolutely, I mean you attract people like yourself and when you feel comfortable with those people, doors open and conversations start and you know, beautiful things happen. Yeah, keeping your ears open.
Speaker 2:Right, and I think when you're when I just want to add on, bob, I've seen how you attract you've you've always attracted people when you were drinking and when you weren't drinking and I think your non-drinking self is more pure, it's more open, there's no guards up. Um, it's way more vulnerable and transparent. And so you know the the attraction you have now is I mean, you do, you can walk into a room you're so confident with who you are, you're so acceptable of, of your character defects and your flaws and, uh, you know that attracts a high frequency, a high vibration around you of people of you know professionals and CEOs and moms and dads and churchgoers and non-churchgoers, and it's just a beautiful thing to watch and I'm just really promoting and encouraging people. If you feel like you got a challenge or a struggle or a problem with alcohol or drugs, man, be open to just visiting the journey, checking it out, and you may have somebody walk up to you and say, no, I'm your sponsor, no, I'm just kidding.
Speaker 3:Yeah, doug, let's transition a little bit. I haven't heard as much, bob, about your health journey since I've known you. I'm always seeing you walking, you know your dog and everything else there. But Doug, kind of you know, gave me a little bit of feedback and everything else.
Speaker 4:Tell me about some of the health journeys and what kind of made you, you know, go on that track. Well, I think the first step was getting sober. That was a big part of my health journey, right? Yes, another, when we talk health, I think mind, body and spirit. Yes, you know, it's not just losing weight or exercising, it's holistically the whole thing. Getting sober was definitely. Without getting sober, I couldn't have moved on to other steps.
Speaker 4:There came a point where I was up to 270 something pounds and I had one pair of pants that I can get closed around my waist. And I knew Doug Coach Doug here. He was on the beginning of a health journey and starting to coach others, and so I called him up and I said dude, I got one pair of pants that fits me. I need some help Fast forward through that reading and understanding a list how you treat your body when you're on a health journey and the things that you need to do as far as sleep, as far as what you put in your body, as far as when you put it in your body, as far as how much you put it in your body, all those things. I learned a lot about that and you know I've been able to maintain 70 pounds of weight loss, for I don't know how many years have you been doing this, doug?
Speaker 2:It'll be eight years in December.
Speaker 4:Yeah, so probably six or seven years now that I've been able to keep that weight off. And you know I'm not on a diet. I just learned a different way to live.
Speaker 2:Yes, Is what it is You're. You're probably like one of my most favorite clients because you literally are not on a diet and you made that happen real quick. You didn't stick around, we gave you tools and things to get you started, but because you dove into the education and you understood the deeper process, the deeper meaning of taking ownership of it, you really created your own lifestyle and, man, I love watching you just live that out loud and and enjoying it. You sent me a picture the other day, uh, of some, some board shorts and you were holding them up to you and I couldn't believe how big them damn things were. Man, Like you could fit two of you in there and I was like, damn, he was wearing them things. Did you see the picture?
Speaker 3:Daryl, no, I didn't. You'll have to send it to me. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4:I looked at him and I said, oh, I got a call. I got to take a picture and show Doug Cause he had played a big role in this.
Speaker 3:That's great, that's great, that's great.
Speaker 4:Yeah, so I did that and I love to walk. I used to be an avid bike rider, like all of you. I, I, you. I rode from Lake Shasta to South Lake Tahoe with Doug on a tour once years ago, but the time away from my family, you know, balancing everything out between the volunteer work that I do and my work and exercise. You got to plan it all out so it all fits in right, right, and so walking worked the best for me, because I could walk my dogs at nighttime and I can look at my schedule on my calendar and I put 90 minutes on my calendar every day and I go for a 90 minute walk. So I do four to five miles a day and I've been doing that for four to five years. Now. I stress out, if I'm looking at my calendar and I'm wondering how I'm going to get that in tomorrow.
Speaker 4:There came a time, after almost a three-year stint, where I didn't miss one day. Wow, I missed a day. But you know what? I got up the next day after that and I just started over again. I didn't beat myself up over it because it's all an inside thing, it's not let me show somebody on social media how many days in a row. I did this. This is my thing. Yeah, I do it for myself.
Speaker 2:I hope you guys. I hope people are tuning in right now, Daryl, because that is, that's gold right there. Go ahead, Daryl.
Speaker 3:No, just two things. You know Doug is always big on he talks about it on this podcast schedule it. You know what I mean. Like, like, like, like, how many times have you heard right, growing up, in high school and college? You write it down. If you write something down, even if you never look at it again, there's a likelihood that you're going to, you know, follow through on it, scheduling it and everything else. And Josephine and I have this discussion quite a bit Sometimes you feel like you can't fit things in. But if you start with the priority and everything else the other thing you know, bob, I see these huge bodybuilders, these cut different people, and there's one podcast that says if you could do one exercise, what would it be? And like, 95% of them say walk. Yeah, right, um, it is literally the number one thing. It's not run, it's not. You know everything else, it's walk.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I have my podcasts that I listened to. I have like three or four podcasts that I really like listening to regularly, so that fills up my time, you know, and I enjoy it a lot Awesome.
Speaker 2:So before we move to the next topic, bob, I want to just encourage you to start looking into rucking. All right, and you can keep it as rucking. It's where you put a weighted vest or weighted backpack on yourself and you start walking with that and too many people go out, and especially guys. You know I got this and throw on, you know 40, 50 pounds right away. But start with the 10 pound weight in your back, in your backpack, and just walk with that. Do that for 30 days because this is a lifestyle. You're not reaching a goal, there is no finish line. And then, after 30 days, add 10 more pounds. Now you got 20 pounds. You're walking with. This is going to start building your fine muscle fibers and your small twitch muscles all these things.
Speaker 2:As you get older, man, you're going to realize oh my gosh, I got this better mobility because I've been building muscle mass and muscle durability and strength. Putting this on, you can build yourself up to don't, don't. I've read a lot of science on it. There's really no benefit to going over 50 pounds. But take your time getting there. You know, 30 days at a time, add 10 pounds. In five months you'll have 50 pounds. You're walking around and you're like holy crap, and then feeling strong.
Speaker 4:I think that's great advice, because I want to do the Camino de Santiago and that will really help me prepare for that. Oh, big time, big time.
Speaker 3:And Doug I want to echo. There's some crazy research on rucking back to military days and the old days about the benefits and all that stuff. So it's been really cool stuff. Doug and I are in a book club and we've been reading. One of the chapters is about some of that different items and it talks about the 50 pound and everything else. So it's a really cool thing to dive into.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I'll do some, I'll reading, I'll read up on it, for sure.
Speaker 2:I'll send you an article after this. Thank you, but let's move into your spiritual journey, bob.
Speaker 4:Oh, come on now. Now you're getting to what I want to talk about. Yeah, we're getting to the purpose.
Speaker 2:We're getting to the purpose. It's coming. So tell us a little bit what was your spirituality like as a kid, as a teenager, and what's it like now?
Speaker 4:Okay, so you know, I'm a Catholic, I was raised Catholic and I'm still Catholic today. When I was growing up, I didn't go to church and I didn't pray to God because I wanted to. I did it because I was told to. There came a point in my adult life and this is five years into my sobriety, you know I got married, I did the engaged encounter in the church and I did all these things and I always believed in God, right, but I didn't have a relationship with them. That I at least acknowledge the relationship. Oh yeah, hey, I got to give credit where credit's due. Doug, you and my brother, joe, tapped me on the shoulder and got me involved in Curcio. I experienced a Curcio weekend. Involved in Curcio, I experienced a Curcio weekend, and I guess the shortest way that I could describe what happened is I felt like I had open heart surgery and I had my heart ripped wide open to then show me how to receive and give love on a level that I've never understood until that moment.
Speaker 2:Wow, yeah, I can definitely relate. I'm getting chills just hearing that and you've shared that story, those words, with me multiple times and every time it's just because we're so close and I've seen where you've been, you've been in the pit of hell, man, and to have you come all the way to the other side and say you know how gracious and how loving and how just kind and generous jesus is to do that and uh, it's a beautiful thing and I'll always be grateful to you and my brother for introducing that cursio program to me, because that's opened up other doors for me as well.
Speaker 4:Um, right on my spiritual journey and I well, I wasn't searching, let me tell you, it's just like as you're going through the journey, things happen and yeah, I just I would never imagine what I, you know, the things that I'm doing today, when I decided to stop drinking 15 years ago, just blows me away sometimes.
Speaker 3:Well, bob, I don't think all of our listeners know all the specifics about the program that you're talking about. So talk about, talk about the program, talk about the journey and talk about the ministry you have.
Speaker 4:Sure, sure. So Curcio started in Spain in the 40s maybe I want to say Right and it was a group of men in the city where they brought the church to the people in the farmlands and they brought music and prayers and community and they brought it out to these folks and they would go to all these different areas and everyone embraced it. There was a three-day weekend and that each day has a theme faith, hope and love and their discussions and you meet a lot of great people while you're doing it. It's all about building your relationship with God and other like-minded people. And I experienced the weekend. I was on fire.
Speaker 4:Doug and my brother picked me up and they wanted me to go out to dinner and break down the weekend for them. And we drove one block and I said I need to go home and tell my wife how much I love her. I can't go out to dinner with you guys right now. I said I'll break it down for you for another time Because I remember I just had open heart surgery and it ripped my heart wide open. So in short, daryl, it's Cursillo is, it's a ministry and it's a three day weekend, and then we have get togethers once a month, once a week, it's various groups of people to keep the fire going and talking to each other. It's a support group, a faith-based support group, and it doesn't have anything to do with drugs or alcohol. It's just about supporting each other's faith.
Speaker 2:And the other cool thing about it is I'll just add this in there it is compiled of people from all like you'll have judges in there. Compiled of people from all like you'll have judges in there attorneys, doctors, garbage men, ex-cons there is just every kind of person in the room, but you don't see their careers or their titles anymore when you're together, man, all you see is the love of Christ in each one of them. I mean, you were a big part. Once you did your weekend and you had your open heart surgery there. You fell in love with the process and I remember you volunteered to give back. You became part of several teams, but that led you to something else and that led you to something else and you said something to me last week about your purpose. Again, remember I said in the beginning this episode is going to lead us into purpose. So tell me what did it lead you into and share with me how you, or share here how you shared with me your conviction Like what did you find now?
Speaker 4:Yeah, so about I don't know, let's call it five is 2016, 2016, 2024. Yeah, About eight years ago I was uh talking with one of my friends in Curcio and they said, hey, uh, we do the same thing that we do at Curcio inside San Quentin prison, that we do at Curcio inside San Quentin Prison, and it's a three-day weekend and guys have to sign up for it. The men in blue would need to sign up and submit an application to get in and we go in with 42 volunteers from the outside and spend Saturday, sunday and Monday 12-hour days inside the prison with the men eating, praying, talking, singing and just doing the same thing that we do at Curcio. But it's a different blend, definitely a different blend.
Speaker 4:You know of what's going on, but in doing that process it's lit a fire. I didn't know I didn't lit a fire. I didn't know I didn't have a purpose. I didn't have a purpose. And I remember coming home once from San Quentin and saying to my wife I found my purpose. Wow, was meant to do this kind of work right here and going in and giving back and being like Jesus and visiting the prisons and not judging anyone and just being there to listen and love and it's a beautiful program that gives more to the volunteers than the men get on the inside, I believe, and they'll tell you the opposite, and they're very grateful for our time and coming in there. But it's an equal give and take relationship because we all get so much out of it.
Speaker 2:Wow, that's huge, bob. And.
Speaker 4:I do it regularly. I go one Friday night a month and we're starting a team formation tomorrow, which means we're going to meet as a team for a few months and then, president's weekend, we will have another three-day weekend inside San Quentin, introducing this program to some new group of men that are serving time in San Quentin, and it's just a beautiful process to watch, from day one, when these men come in really not knowing what they're getting into, kind of hard and stiff Right, and then, by the time the weekend ends, the smiles and the walls that have been knocked down and the hearts that have been ripped open. It's like amazing to witness, just absolutely amazing, and I feel blessed to be a part of it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you probably believe one of those situations where you probably get a hell of a lot more than you than they got.
Speaker 4:I'm so. I believe that, but you know, they'll tell me otherwise. Yeah.
Speaker 2:No, no, yeah, I get it. I believe that, but they'll tell me otherwise. Yeah, I get it.
Speaker 3:But don't you think that's one of the big cornerstones of at least of my journey? What is happiness? What are all these things? There's some sayings the people that look for happiness aren't going to find it. The people that help and serve others find happiness. It's almost like the more you give, you know, the more, the more you get. And, um, you know, I just, uh, you know, I see your pictures, I see some of the things Doug talked to me about it. Is this something that's just a San Quentin thing, or is this something that is in a majority of the different prisons, like Folsom and others?
Speaker 4:Yeah, that's a great question, Gerald. It's actually's actually in men and women's prisons and it's an international organization. I don't speak for the organization, I'm just a volunteer, but it's an international organization, that's awesome.
Speaker 2:You know, bob, I remember being at a conference one time and the speaker was on stage and he said you know, so many people come up and they ask me how do I find my purpose, what's my purpose, what's my purpose? And he says I always tell them, you know, you won't know, you just have to get into action. Just get into action, start volunteering for things that you love or things that make you feel good. Just get into action. And as you do that, at some point your purpose will find you. And I'm hearing those words as you're sharing your story. I'm like because, Bob, you've been in that the moment you said yes to your recovery, way back then, or your recovery then, your health, your spiritual life. You've been in constant action and you still are. And it's so cool, you know, because it sounds like just recently, in the big picture of things, like I know my purpose now, right, like you're so convicted about that. How old are you, bob? I'm 65. You're 65.
Speaker 2:So I want to ask you a question before we wrap this up, or as we wrap this up 65, right. And when did you find your purpose? 64, 63, 62, 60, what? In the last year? Okay, so, yeah, so you found your purpose in the last year. So if, if a 25 year old, 35 year old or 45 year old came up to you and they said Bob man, I just love what you do and and, man, you're a great example. But I'm struggling, I don't know who I am and I don't know what I'm good at and I don't know what my purpose is, and they just flat out ask you like, what should I do? How would you advise them? What would you say to that person?
Speaker 4:My initial gut response would be is what's your relationship with God like? Would be my first thing out of my mouth, but that would scare some people away. So I have to be careful about how you answer that, because I certainly want to provide love and support, but I don't want to scare anyone away. I would say I wasn't looking for purpose. I found it by doing service, and staying busy opens up so many doors and educates you along the way, and you meet so many wonderful people while you're doing service. That's what's been part of my journey. To get me to where I'm at today is number one saying yes. I think sometimes my wife would wish that I had ropes tied around my arms so I stopped volunteering for everything.
Speaker 2:That's funny. We're working on them, nance. We're trying to get them to get balance. I know you're listening to this. We love you, nance, miss you too. I'm sending you a hug over the radio waves here, the podcast land.
Speaker 2:But yeah, bob, as your just I'm so as your brother from another mother man, I'm so proud of you. I've always looked up to you, always from ever since I was a little boy and you shared special things with me to, you know, into my adulthood. You know I love when we get to share moments like that together and share experiences together. And I know you know, lately, you know, because of our distance it's not, it's not as frequent as it used to be. But the cool thing is is you're always near and dear to my heart, man. There's just not a day that goes by, and rarely a day that goes by, that I don't think about you and definitely praying for you all the time, because I see the work you're doing and I know the prayers are are needed. So keep doing what you're doing. Brother Daryl, is there anything else you want to?
Speaker 3:add no, just, we've done quite a few podcasts. I love that we're talking about service, right. When we really get to the theme of this and you just said it, Bob at the end it's really about service and giving back to others, Right, and uh, I'm thrilled that, uh, that when we had Bob on, but that we're also addressing this topic also about health and recovery. So, you know, outstanding hour.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, Bob. Any last comments to the Peach Podcast audience.
Speaker 4:Hey, keep doing what you're doing, you guys. I look forward to it every week and you keep me inspired and moving forward. So God bless both of you for the work you're doing.
Speaker 2:Thanks, bob, we love you. Brother Thanksrell, we'll just end this the way we usually do and say God bless and peace out, peace out, we're out, bye.