S2 Ep2 Why You Need To Be Misunderstood In Your Marketing

In last week's episode, I spoke about the power of creating change-making marketing, but there's a slip to that, which also needs the spotlight.

Being misunderstood in your marketing. 

The truth is, when you go against the grain, stand firmly in your truth and claim what you are really here to do, people aren't going to get it. 

And yes, as we spoke about last week, we can change perceptions and beliefs within our marketing. 

But we also have to be ok with people misunderstanding what we do, too.

That's what we dive into in the episode.

And what I explore in my latest Substack: 

https://emmaorlando.substack.com/p/0ea5b0bc-540d-429c-a109-88c9a4fe3cda 

I'd love to hear what you thought of this episode!

Head over to Instagram and let me know:

www.instagram.com/consciouscreatorco_

Transcript

(0:00) Hi and welcome to The Mirror, the podcast where conscious business owners learn how to practise (0:06) marketing that is conscious, enjoyable and a true mirror of the brilliance of their service. (0:13) This isn't another generic marketing podcast, this is where you learn the deep psychological (0:18) principles that create effective marketing, where you can quiet the noise of the business world and (0:24) tune in to how to do things that are a true reflection of you, where you can learn how (0:29) to finally have the impact you know you are capable and worthy of having. I'm your host Emma, (0:36) a marketing expert of over a decade.I truly love what I do and I'm bursting with knowledge to share (0:41) with you all. So sit back, relax and let's dive in. Hi and welcome back to another episode, (0:50) one that just a few months ago I wouldn't have actually been able to sit down and record (0:54) because I really feel like I have been experiencing the wisdom, the lessons, (1:00) the understanding of this over the past few months and in my current reality as well.(1:07) And I, like many of us, can have the tendency to wait until I have fully experienced something (1:13) before I come to share on it but I crave seeing the messy middle and I want to create from the (1:24) was because the other day I was with some fellow freelance friends (1:28) who are in a similar industry to me so pretty much every time I go and meet up with them (1:34) we're chatting about things, we're understanding each other, we're sharing, we're supporting (1:38) and everyone really gets it and it's always such a sigh of relief because we're like oh (1:44) someone understands. And recently, the last few times that I have gone, (1:49) I have noticed myself almost shut down a little bit because I have this feeling that people aren't (1:57) going to fully understand when I explain the direction that I'm moving in in my business. (2:03) And I speak about this in my last episode if you have no clue what I'm talking about (2:07) and some of it I think is obviously just fear.If you're doing something different, (2:12) especially if it's not necessarily the common narrative, there's always going to be this fear (2:18) of people not fully getting it but I also think some of it's true as well of like people do tend (2:24) to have more questions and sometimes you can just tell from the look that like someone hasn't fully (2:30) understood what you're doing and I'm just getting the sense that it's really not as easily packaged (2:38) as what I was doing before because I was just talking about marketing in a way that many others (2:45) were talking about it. I was talking about marketing strategy which most people can understand (2:49) far more easily and just in general people know that they need it and that is why I had a booked (2:56) out business when I was doing this and in another episode I speak about why I decided to rebrand a (3:01) booked out business that really dives into this but I just didn't feel like I was fully in my truth. (3:08) And so at the moment I'm experiencing this weird dynamic where when I'm at home by myself (3:13) journaling or when I'm behind a mic speaking about what I do or when I am around people that (3:19) actually genuinely really do get it, I have never felt more in flow, more lit up, I've never found (3:26) my work easier to speak about and yet in certain situations in certain forms of marketing I am (3:34) feeling like people don't get it and there's this energy of me being misunderstood or this work (3:41) being misunderstood.And it's really interesting because we often speak about your marketing making (3:49) sure that people understand what you do, that is very much something that I have spoken about, (3:53) my background's in psychology so really about understanding your clients and making sure you (3:57) are speaking about your work in a way that they understand and that is really really important. (4:02) I will absolutely stand by that, I still help clients do that now because what we want is (4:07) people to recognise themselves within your work and we can often speak about it as experts, (4:14) practitioners, teachers in a way that sometimes people can't see themselves within and that's (4:21) really key part of marketing, it's also fundamental to our marketing being impactful right because if (4:26) people can't see themselves in what we're talking about we can't truly have impact for them. (4:32) But there is a caveat here that I have been really realising and that is that yes that's true but (4:39) also sometimes people don't understand because they're not supposed to understand, it's not (4:46) actually for those people be it the friends you're talking to about it or the clients who you are (4:53) attracting in and this is why we need to make sure that we are fully expressed within our truth, (5:00) in our marketing because I have had several clients come to me recently where they have (5:05) been attracting clients that they've been great to work with but they know that it's not fully (5:11) aligned and when we trace it back it's always because they've been told by somebody like a (5:17) business coach or a marketing expert that they need to make their marketing clearer and this (5:22) is something that is drummed into you in marketing so I have very much done this as well but they (5:27) need to make sure that there's a clear sell, there's an A to B transformation, the results are (5:31) obvious and so they attract in people looking for those results but what they're not fully taking (5:39) into consideration is the approach that they take to obtain those results because most people might (5:47) want that B point as we speak about the A to B but they actually really might not resonate with (5:53) your way of doing things, of your approach, of your beliefs, of your values and unless we make (6:00) that known within marketing we're going to continue to attract misaligned clients and (6:07) interestingly there is always some sort of resistance for my clients that come in in fully (6:12) stepping into that.I had a client recently who is such a spiritual human and when she was speaking (6:18) we were having so many deep conversations and it was just amazing and she admitted that she (6:22) feels scared to put that out into the world, she feels like this spiritual part of her is such a (6:30) beautiful essence and she loves it but she's afraid that some clients just won't get it and (6:35) won't resonate with that and the thing is is some might not and what we tend to do is shut down (6:44) such a huge part of our essence and our energy and our uniqueness because we are trying to make (6:50) our work fit more people, we're trying to make as many people as possible understand it and want (6:57) to buy it and the only real way of doing that is to massively water down your essence, your energy, (7:05) it's to use these more generic forms of marketing, it's to present solutions that people can really (7:11) get or approaches that they are going to fully want like there's not going to be any resistance (7:17) around it and i speak about this in my last episode but what we're essentially doing here is (7:23) bypassing the change that needs to happen for people to be ready to receive our service and (7:28) part of that change can only come from when we fully express in truth, it can only arrive when (7:36) we are fully seen within our work and the way that we do it and we often hear people speak about niche (7:42) and probably if you're hearing that feel some resistance to it because most of the clients (7:47) come to me they're like i can't niche i've tried i've been told how to do it i've done it with a (7:53) strategist before doesn't work for me like i don't have a niche and i'm like yes you do but you don't (7:58) need to create your niche you don't need to write about it you don't need to create a client avatar (8:02) your niche naturally arrives when you speak about your work in the truest possible way when you (8:09) infuse as much of your energy within your marketing as possible that is when your niche (8:14) arrives but for that true niche and by that i mean people that get your work are ready to receive it (8:21) are ready to do the work required you know don't come with huge unrealistic expectations but are (8:26) really just ready to receive in the way that you deliver you have to be misunderstood by people (8:32) you have to be misunderstood by the clients that are not going to resonate with you (8:37) your approach or maybe they're looking for a certain result that you can't guarantee (8:43) or just maybe they're not ready you know there's so many reasons why people do not want to buy our (8:49) work and they're all valid and fair and yes part of marketing is creating that behavioural change (8:54) of readiness but also some people it's just not for them and when we're speaking about sharing (9:01) on social media or writing our marketing in a way that is really resonant feels like it's our (9:07) truth and attracts in clients that are going to really get it and want the way we do things (9:11) we are actually talking about having the courage to be misunderstood by people for people to come (9:17) onto our website and go i don't this doesn't land this isn't for me i don't resonate with (9:23) this approach and that's scary right that's really really scary for us to sit with especially if (9:29) you're somebody who has a service that you see it and you're like this could benefit everyone like (9:33) everyone could benefit from this because i always say this yes they probably could but if they're (9:38) not ready to receive it then they couldn't and that's really what's key and so when i was sat (9:44) around with these friends who like i say they're so supportive but i had this moment of just like (9:49) my work is not for these people yes it could benefit them yes they can celebrate it and they (9:59) can really praise me for doing it but it's not finding the deepest resonance with these people (10:05) because it is not supposed to and i can even feel this when i go to post like i know certain people (10:12) are not going to understand this piece of content they're not going to resonate with it and i'll be (10:17) honest sometimes that makes me not want to share it but what i have been really practising is the (10:22) right people will and the proof is really in the pudding here because i have been getting bookings (10:29) of my free 30 minute calls from the most incredible people and they have filled out applications to (10:36) work with me and everything within it is just speaking about how deeply they resonate like (10:41) it's got the highest praise of my approach and my way of doing things and they've told me how much (10:46) they've enjoyed reading my content and i've seen themselves within it and that this approach really (10:51) lands for them like i never sell on these free calls i share a link to work with me afterwards (10:56) but the last few have just literally been like yeah how do i sign up to work with you let's go (11:01) right now and it's because i have been just sharing from a place of truth i'm on these calls (11:06) and i feel so energised by them i feel so like i am really expressing in a way that it's just natural (11:15) to me and this has taken a lot of self-development it's taken a lot of kind of inner crumblings of (11:21) it really feels like identities and ego deaths because there's the part of me that's like oh (11:26) no i've got to be an expert and i've got to have all the answers and i've got to give these results (11:31) and people are only going to want this and they're not going to understand that you know like that (11:34) inner chatter that's constantly trying to convince you that you are in danger because in a way it (11:40) feels like that i am jeopardising my chance of belonging in many situations to fully stand in (11:47) my truth and that does feel unsafe for us and if you listen to my other episodes you'll know that i (11:53) have had a lot of somatic therapy and done a lot of parts work and i've actually recently had some (11:57) hypnotherapy on these different things because i know that i want to express from this place of (12:03) truth but i also know that a part of me is very afraid to do that and like i said i've been (12:08) witnessing this with clients as well but for you to really be your most successful self within your (12:14) business it really does require you to claim this knowing that not everyone is going to get your work (12:22) and it is not about making it so that everyone can understand it and i had a client say this to me (12:28) recently that several mentors had said to her i just don't get your work i don't get what you do (12:33) and it got to the point literally where every time she wrote something she was questioning (12:38) herself going but that's not clear enough they're not going to get that people won't get it (12:42) and when she spoke to me about her work i just let her free flow on it i was like your work (12:46) makes perfect sense and the way that you express it is beautiful and your stories are so resonant (12:51) i see myself in them all you've actually seen me in a way that others haven't been able to like i (12:58) see myself in your work i fully get it and it's really when clients are in that space of just (13:05) freely expressing that all of that resonance really comes through the problem is then when (13:12) they translate that into marketing and they try and make it clearer they water it down they make (13:17) it like as strategic as possible to the point that i'm like okay well now you've lost me right you (13:22) had me when you were speaking about it naturally and now i'm lost and it's because the difference (13:26) is is when they're speaking about it with me they're speaking from a place of truth they are (13:30) expressing authentically and then when it comes to creating that into marketing they are creating (13:36) strategically and obviously as i said we need to do both we need to have consideration of whether (13:41) people are going to understand things whether they're going to see themselves within it (13:44) if we're fully capturing our work and strategy so helpful for that but what we really also need to (13:51) be doing is claiming our truth and even when it comes down to writing your marketing in a way that (13:56) you would speak about your work saying the thing that you really want to say but you're afraid that (14:02) it might repel some people being bold in the way that you express about your work and my friend (14:08) called me out on this recently actually she was like the way you speak about certain topics is so (14:13) captivating and powerful and you water that down every time within your marketing because i watch (14:19) it then come out as your marketing because all of my marketing comes from like conversations and (14:24) different things i observe and witness it's just gonna new water it down and i'm like fuck yeah i (14:29) do do that and this is what i mean about me going through this at the moment of really being called (14:35) to step into truth and saying what i want to say and of course being considerate of others of course (14:41) thinking about how clients will receive it and what they'll be receptive to but not watering myself (14:47) down to the point that i don't even have a point anymore and this is something i've been really (14:51) guilty of doing in the past and it is very much tied to this like people pleasing energy which i (14:56) know so many of us have been moving through but when we are in that place of just expressing like (15:03) the posts that i am sharing at the moment like i can't wait to share them i feel so lit up i feel (15:07) so creative i feel so alive i feel so me and it is just coming back within the way that it is (15:14) received so much like i don't think i've ever received so many i resonate with this so much (15:19) messages and i shared about this in a post the other day like this is the power of your marketing (15:23) like you have the power to make someone feel so seen understood supported inspired empowered (15:32) within the words that you share but only when you are really sharing the words (15:39) that feel true for you because your experiences and your way of expressing has the kind of frequency (15:45) that people feel and when we strip that essence we lose that frequency we lose the feeling (15:53) behind our marketing and these are the kinds of things that when i say this in a group of (15:59) marketing strategies they're like what are you talking about like we just need to create (16:03) strategically and write like this and do like this and this is what's going to go viral (16:06) and there's absolutely place for that within the marketing world it's just not my place in the (16:11) anymore and so of course maybe i'm going to be misunderstood by these people maybe some people (16:17) are going to unfollow me maybe some people are going to read my posts and go i don't get that (16:22) what's she talking about and you've probably got parts of your life where you're already (16:26) experiencing this where perhaps family don't understand some of the life choices that you've (16:30) made i know they're fine sometimes they're like em what are you doing to which i'm often like i (16:36) don't know but yeah you'll have examples of this if you are the type of person that is really (16:41) doing things differently going against the grain of things this is actually something that you're (16:47) already used to you're used to doing things in a way that not everybody gets and you know (16:53) that it's worth it it's worth being misunderstood in that way for you to live a life of truth to (17:00) live a life that really serves you and fulfils you and is aligned with you you know that not (17:05) everybody is going to get the choices that you make and it is the same within marketing not (17:10) everyone is going to get your expressions and that means that you're probably in the strongest (17:16) truth you can be and this is really what lights me up to help people create within the marketing (17:22) marketing that feels so true to them oh it just honestly gives me goosebumps of like (17:28) yeah that that energy of like oh i feel so expressed within that because i truly think (17:33) that is one of the greatest feelings of when you actually feel like people are really seeing you (17:38) and they understand what you're saying and they just get it and that does come when you really (17:45) root into what you want to say and you give yourself permission to say it and it also does (17:50) mean that people are going to misunderstand you so i hope you have enjoyed listening to this episode (17:58) i really enjoyed actually getting it out it's been really cathartic to speak about what i'm (18:02) experiencing so yeah i hope that has landed with you if you want to be seen by me and to express (18:09) on your work to somebody that just holds space and reflects back to you my free 30 minute calls (18:15) are still available i will share the link below and as i always say the dates are really limited (18:19) for those so keep checking back if there's no dates when you look i do add them as and when i (18:24) can and they're such a joy to share with you so thank you if you have booked one or even if you're (18:28) thinking about booking one i really appreciate it i hope you enjoyed this episode thank you so (18:34) much for listening to this episode i really hope that it was helpful for you and if it has made you (18:41) want to find out more of the ways you can work with me all of the information about one-to-one (18:47) my resources my programmes are all listed below in the show notes if you found this helpful i would (18:55) really appreciate if you could take a moment just to write a review this helps other creators just (19:02) like yourselves find this podcast and have even greater impact from their services i would really (19:10) really love to hear from you please feel free to get in touch with me over on instagram or via email (19:17) both of which again you can find below thank you so much for being here and until next time