S2 Ep9 The Messy Middle: When Sharing Your Truth Feels Terrifying

In this deeply honest episode, I invite you into the raw, unfiltered middle ground of conscious creation, the place where your truth feels alive… but also utterly exposing.

After last week’s episode on the courage to create, I reflect on a recent creative moment that pushed me right up against my own edges. What happens when you share something that feels true, powerful, and expressive, only for your nervous system to go into full panic? What do you do when your truth suddenly doesn’t feel “safe”?

I open up about the article I wrote (and loved), the discomfort that followed when I shared it publicly, and the very human urge to retract, hide, or dilute your message when others might not agree. You’ll hear me talk about energetic shifts, throat chakra flare-ups, nervous system responses, and the lifelong journey of learning to stand in your truth without abandoning yourself.

This episode is a reminder that the creative process is not linear. Sometimes you’re brave. Sometimes you’re wobbly. Sometimes you delete the TikTok and that’s okay. Sharing what’s real doesn’t mean never feeling afraid; it means learning to meet your edges with compassion, curiosity, and care.

If you’ve ever questioned your voice, worried about being “too much” or “not enough,” or felt overwhelmed when your work starts to be seen, this episode will meet you right where you are.

Sit back, sip something soothing, and join me in the beautifully imperfect space where conscious marketing and human truth meet.

I'd love to hear what you thought of this episode!

Head over to Instagram and let me know:

www.instagram.com/consciouscreatorco_

Transcript

(0:00) Hi and welcome to The Mirror, the podcast where conscious business owners learn how to practise (0:06) marketing that is conscious, enjoyable and a true mirror of the brilliance of their service. (0:13) This isn't another generic marketing podcast, this is where you learn the deep psychological (0:18) principles that create effective marketing, where you can quiet the noise of the business world and (0:24) tune in to how to do things that are a true reflection of you, where you can learn how to (0:29) finally have the impact you know you are capable and worthy of having. I'm your host Emma, a (0:36) marketing expert of over a decade.I truly love what I do and I'm bursting with knowledge to (0:41) share with you all, so sit back, relax and let's dive in. Hi and welcome back to another episode. (0:50) I am actually feeling a little bit croaky so I just wanted to apologise if my voice sounds a bit (0:55) odd during this episode but I really wanted to sit down at the mic and I actually think that the (1:02) reason I'm feeling a little bit under the weather is a lot to do with things surfacing and energy (1:08) coming up and I don't love using the word up-levelling but I think sometimes it's quite a (1:14) good way to explain of like kind of when we start to up-level and our body almost needs a minute (1:19) to catch up like I've had this a lot where when I really start claiming my truth, when I start (1:26) doing what I want to be doing, when I build momentum, my body is just kind of like hold on a minute (1:31) give me a second to catch up and it's really interesting actually because I'm feeling it all (1:35) in my throat today which is obviously heavily related to the throat chakra and this is so (1:42) interesting when I go on to tell you the premise of this episode because I want to be really (1:49) honest about actually the episode I shared on last week which is on the courage to create and (1:56) if you haven't listened it might help to go back and provide some context to this episode but (2:01) I was essentially speaking about how important it is for us to share what is really true and (2:06) really alive for us and quite a lot of what I do within my sessions when we are focussing on (2:11) people's messaging is we start with the message that they have been putting out into the world (2:15) and they feel quite at home and at ease in and then we tend to dig and find deeper layers and (2:20) we get to the real truth of what their message really means and really moves and it always kind (2:26) of meets this edge of just like oh but that doesn't feel as safe and so much about creation (2:33) creativity is about creating that safety and I spoke about that in the last episode (2:38) but the funny thing is is I feel a little bit like a fraud for sharing it not that everything (2:43) I was saying wasn't true and not that I haven't been on this huge journey of really claiming what (2:48) I'm here to say and move within marketing and life as well but as I shared on that (2:55) I had also shared an article that I was so excited to share I was sat at home one Saturday morning (3:05) in my pyjamas eating banana bread just I think probably Olivia Dean was playing in the background (3:09) just to paint the picture and I suddenly had this pull like this creative idea that I wanted (3:16) to write a response piece to the viral is having a boyfriend embarrassing now article you may have (3:22) seen it you may not but essentially it's a real thought-provoking piece where people in relationships (3:29) were sharing about how they were finding it embarrassing to have a boyfriend like they (3:32) weren't posting them on social media they were kind of hiding it and then the piece went on to (3:37) speak about how for the first time ever we're really questioning if men you know are up to the (3:43) standards that we as women have really set for ourselves and it's not about having the status (3:49) anymore of a boyfriend for a woman or a partner or a husband or you know whatever just being in a (3:56) relationship there is actually so much empowerment these days from being single and it's this weird (4:02) dynamic where it's kind of almost switched to be more embarrassing to be with a man who maybe isn't (4:09) fully serving and you know isn't up to the standards that these incredible women that we have in the (4:17) world have really set for themselves and it was just like a really poignant piece in time where (4:24) the narrative has really flipped the script and I thought it was yeah really interesting I read a lot (4:29) of people's thought pieces on it I read a lot of videos on it and I just thought yeah this is a (4:34) really interesting discussion to be having and then I saw the creator create a video where of (4:40) course she had received backlash for it and of course everyone is entitled to opinions like these (4:45) topics are very nuanced obviously the headline was very like clickbaity like the piece is actually (4:52) not about finding it embarrassing to have a boyfriend entirely it's a much deeper more nuanced (4:57) topic than that but essentially she was being called out by people in relationships and of course (5:04) the narrative was that she was bitter she was jealous she was lonely so she was like turning (5:10) on people in relationships and I found this really interesting and it inspired a piece for me and if (5:18) you don't already know I set myself the task a few months back where my substack was going to be (5:24) more you know lifestyle pieces I didn't want it to be solely focused on marketing and the (5:29) reason being was that I used to be a lifestyle writer and I really miss it I really enjoyed (5:34) doing that and I wanted a creative outlet where I could share many many articles that are in my (5:40) drafts and I thought substack is the perfect platform for that so anyway I wrote a response (5:45) piece to this video and I loved it like you know those pieces where your fingers are just flying (5:50) like everything is forming as you're typing like these opinions that you didn't even know you had (5:56) you're feeling feelings that perhaps you've pushed down like you're feeling so expressed and so in (6:02) your truth and whenever I write like this it always meets an edge of mine because I'm like wow this (6:08) feels really honest and it also I don't like to use the word controversial because I'm not (6:13) intentionally being controversial I'm not doing that to get clicks and views and outrage comments (6:19) that fuel the algorithm I'm doing it actually because it's my opinion and I kind of reject that (6:26) we have even the thing of controversial opinion because our opinions are our opinions right and (6:32) some people are going to agree with them and some people aren't and so this was really my (6:37) lived experience but I also knew as I was writing it that it wasn't going to be true for a lot of (6:43) people perhaps it was going to be again not intentionally but triggering for some people (6:50) perhaps it's gonna you know make them reflect on some things that perhaps they're not fully ready (6:55) to reflect on and see and then the flip side of that is that for other people it's going to be (7:00) this safe space to finally land it's going to be that sigh of relief that oh someone gets it and (7:05) like yes that's what I've been thinking so anyway I hit publish I was a bit nervous too but also (7:13) substack feels like my safe little sanctuary where I can express on there because like I don't (7:18) have loads of people I know following me it's a much smaller audience the people who do read are (7:23) much more engaged and maybe a bit more anonymous is what's kind of coming up as I'm saying this (7:28) so I hit publish on it and I was excited I read it again and I was like oh I love this which (7:34) it's taken a lot for me to really claim loving my work I've always been highly critical of it (7:39) but I still definitely had that edge and so one thing I've been trying to do is share this work (7:45) as well because I don't really get massive reach on substack so I've been creating it as little (7:49) carousels and occasionally putting it on TikTok which I know is against the rules and you should (7:54) be doing videos with hooks and short and choppy and changey but that's just not me that's not (8:00) my style and I'm not gonna do it so I shared it as a carousel with like screenshots of the article (8:06) and all of a sudden it felt like a tiger was chasing me like my nervous system went into oh (8:13) this is not safe the reason being is a lot of people I know follow me on TikTok a lot of people (8:20) are like kind of recommended me who know me perhaps obviously it's just a much wider audience (8:26) and the spread is far quicker and the article started to get views it started to get comments (8:32) it started to get reshares and I started to panic and the reason being is because I imagined (8:38) people I know reading that article I don't even I can't even like fully articulate it but basically (8:45) just being like oh well I didn't know she thought like that or maybe even at worst is she judging me (8:53) because the opinion that I was sharing potentially contradicted this and anyway I got so caught up (9:00) in their reaction and their response to it that I then started to not see the value of the article (9:07) I then started to feel unsafe in sharing it and I started to question my opinions right I was going (9:13) back through the article like oh is that is that too harsh is that gonna make you feel uncomfortable (9:17) and it was no longer reading the article through the lens of my truth it was the truth of others (9:23) that I was considering and so I deleted the share so I deleted the TikTok I think it's because it (9:29) was just like it was a Saturday morning and I was like do you know what I don't want to spend (9:32) my Saturday morning in fight or flight like I know there is some inner work that needs to be (9:36) done on this and I'm gonna sit with that and I did I took it to a session that I had with a (9:42) beautiful healer and we kind of chatted it all through and I was like I'm just gonna leave it (9:46) there for now and I thought this is so funny because I have literally just shared a podcast (9:52) on this very topic and I always say this to clients but I feel like whenever you really claim something (9:56) within your own work the universe is kind of like here's an opportunity to be the living (10:00) embodiment of it and I think many of us beat ourselves up if we can't fully be the living (10:07) embodiment of it like I have some clients say to me like oh well I can't do this because I haven't (10:11) like fully owned it within myself yet and I think this is really interesting because we have this (10:16) perception that you know everybody wants us to be a perfect human and to have it all figured out and (10:21) to be like completely embodied and deeply rooted in our expertise when the reality is is humans (10:26) connect with humans right and I've had so many conversations about clients but they don't feel (10:30) like they can share their truth and I had a whole episode on this I think it's entitled something (10:35) around messy marketing where I shared about how much I struggled with marketing and people signed (10:39) up to me because of that and like we have this assumption that you know if we're in the mess of (10:45) it if we're still figuring it out ourselves if we still experience some of the things that we speak (10:50) on then we're not enough let's say and this work let's say like inner work for me of claiming my (10:58) truth and it being true regardless of how others might react to it of course I still want to be (11:05) a considerate human and if I'm putting out something that I know is going to offend people (11:09) or is deliberately antagonising or just unkind then I'm obviously not going to share it hopefully (11:15) I won't even write it like but this wasn't the case with that you know it was very thoughtful (11:22) and considered and balanced and it was just my truth and I want to be okay with that but I (11:30) honestly feel like it's probably going to be a lifelong lesson for me to really claim that and (11:36) this is why I reject actually a lot of marketing that's like you're before and after like you're (11:41) going to finish someone's service and become a finished product because I have done so much work (11:46) on claiming my truth and being okay with others opinions not agreeing and not taking responsibility (11:51) for others reactions and it's still something that's prevalent within me and I'm okay with that (11:55) I don't need to have that all figured out and it inspired me because I need to sit down and share (12:00) the other side of having the courage to create where sometimes sharing feels terrifying you do (12:06) worry about what people are going to think of it you do take responsibility for their reaction (12:12) and it can lead you to silence what is true for you and whilst you know I've shared many posts (12:18) that have really met an edge of mine and all these things have come up and I've kept them there and (12:22) I've had the strength for whatever reason with this piece and with this day let's say I wasn't (12:28) in the space to do that and I think that's really okay and I realised that when I had shared that (12:33) piece on having the courage to create I really needed to give more time and space to the other (12:38) side of that and it's so funny how my body is like fully in reaction to this like throat really sore (12:44) like I woke up this morning and it was just like shooting pain going down my throat and like even (12:47) now you can probably hear my voice like it feels just kind of blocked and I'm like am I unwell or (12:52) is this something energetic because it feels really prevalent and I'm gonna do some healing (12:57) work around the throat chakra now but I just also really felt like I just had to come and speak my (13:02) truth right because yeah that's that is the practise that is the process and I just wanted (13:08) to create some compassion and understanding for having this knowing of wanting to share what is (13:15) true for you and put that into the world and feel expressed but also needing to prioritise the (13:21) importance of being regulated around that and tending to the nervous system that doesn't always (13:26) feel safe to do it and sometimes we are going to share with shaky hands and a sense of unease and (13:33) it doesn't mean we shouldn't do it and it doesn't mean that we haven't like mastered our nervous (13:37) systems or whatever like sometimes that's how we share and it's about coming back to the safety (13:42) within our body and feeling nervous about it I was actually reading a sub stack from a practitioner (13:47) whose work is heavily rooted around somatic work and just like energy and regulated nervous system (13:54) and she shared at the start of the article how she felt really nervous sharing it and was full (13:58) of fear and you know even after hitting publish like felt this sense of unease and I think that (14:03) we need to acknowledge that sometimes putting our work out into the world does that and we can (14:07) come back into a place of regulation or if like how I was the other day sometimes we just have (14:13) to remove it and say you know what I'm not ready for that at the moment that's not ready to be (14:17) and I kept the article up on sub stack but I wasn't ready to share it more publicly and I can (14:24) sit with that and I can do some work around that or I can just come into acceptance that like okay (14:29) that's that's something that's just going to develop over the time maybe we're not fully ready (14:32) for that and what I want to be really mindful of is like actually we're not wanting to shock the (14:37) nervous system and go right that's it I'm going to make a big announcement I'm going to share my (14:40) truth like who cares who reads it I'm just going to do it because we're going to send ourselves (14:44) into this spiral and we're probably going to go into freeze which is definitely what I've done in (14:48) the past and then we're not going to want to share anything at all it's really about like meeting (14:53) that edge of course not just then going right I'm only going to share what feels comfortable and I'm (14:58) going to water everything down and I'm going to make sure that everything's perfectly balanced (15:01) no one can be offended which is very much how I used to create by the way we're going to find (15:06) this place where we slowly meet an edge maybe we share something it's a bit uncomfortable and we (15:10) feel a bit of that discomfort with it and we do some practises around regulating that and then (15:15) maybe next time we share a little bit more truthful like for me having even shared that (15:19) on substack was a huge step so maybe I'm like I didn't need to go the full hog with TikTok just (15:23) yet you know like it's like baby steps to the process and I really want to make sure that I'm (15:28) not speaking in extremes about this because there is so much nuance within the middle and (15:34) as you can hear me today in some very messy musings where I'm figuring it all out as I go (15:40) this is the middle ground this is what it looks like it's sometimes having the courage (15:43) and sometimes just being like I don't have the capacity for that right now and both are okay (15:48) you know we don't owe anyone anything this is our marketing we get to share what we want to share (15:52) and we get to do so in a way where we feel okay with it yes we're meeting edges perhaps we feel (15:57) nervous perhaps there's some fear but we're not pushing ourselves so far that we actually just (16:02) want to run away and hide in the woods and I have to be very careful of that I do have hermit in my (16:07) chart and I do have like kind of like that one foot ready to run to the woods and hide in a cabin (16:14) so yes this is the messy musings I did want to come but I also feel like I really need to rest (16:19) my voice so I'm gonna sit with my hot lemon and yeah just take a little bit of time just to really (16:26) integrate this like it's been really beautiful to witness it and now I feel like it needs some (16:31) love and some care and yeah I would love to know if this has landed with you in any way or if (16:37) there's anything that's yeah felt really alive for you that you would love to share with me (16:41) my dms are always open and as always I really appreciate you meeting me in the messy middle of (16:47) my musings where yeah things don't always make perfect sense and they don't paint the prettiest (16:51) picture but they're real and they're human and I think that's what our marketing needs a whole lot (16:56) more of so thank you so much for being here thank you so much for listening to this episode (17:02) I really hope that it was helpful for you and if it has made you want to find out more of the ways (17:08) you can work with me all of the information about one-to-one my resources my programmes are all listed (17:16) below in the show notes if you found this helpful I would really appreciate if you could take a (17:23) moment just to write a review this helps other creators just like yourselves find this podcast (17:30) and have an even greater impact from their services I would really really love to hear (17:37) from you please feel free to get in touch with me over on instagram or via email both of which (17:44) again you can find below thank you so much for being here and until next time