3 Ways to Become a Disciplined Monster in a World of Distraction with Pete Taylor

Global speaker, podcaster, activator of men.
Co-founder of Heroic Man, home to thousands of men forging their paths.

In this episode of Man: A Quest to Find Meaning, we sit down with Pete, who shares his powerful story of navigating life’s uncertainties and turning setbacks into valuable lessons for personal growth. Pete opens up about his journey, revealing the challenges he’s faced, from moments of self-doubt and feeling unfulfilled to redefining his path in the face of adversity.

Together, we dive into the complexities of pursuing purpose and how the pressure to “have it all figured out” can lead to frustration and a sense of being lost. Pete reflects on his experiences with overcoming fear, breaking free from limiting beliefs, and the pivotal moments that led him to embrace uncertainty as a pathway to growth. His insights offer a refreshing perspective on failure, teaching us that setbacks are not the end but rather stepping stones to becoming stronger, wiser, and more resilient.

This episode is packed with actionable advice on managing self-doubt, quieting the inner critic, and creating a life aligned with who you truly are. Pete shares practical strategies for reframing challenges, building confidence, and cultivating a mindset that sees change as an opportunity rather than a threat.

Whether you're feeling stuck, unsure about your next steps, or simply looking for inspiration, Pete’s story and insights will resonate with anyone on the path to self-discovery and fulfillment. Tune in for an honest, relatable conversation that encourages you to embrace life’s unknowns and trust in your own journey.

https://www.linkedin.com/in/peterleontaylor/
https://heroicman.com/
https://www.youtube.com/@theawakenedman
https://podfollow.com/the-awakened-man/view
https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheAwakenedManProject/

Transcript

Hello, everybody. My name is James. I'm the host of Man: A Quest to Find Meaning and today I have a very special guest, Pete Taylor. How are you, Pete? James, I'm super well, mate. How are we doing?   I'm actually really feeling really good. It's obviously it's a bit of a cloudy day, but it's all part of the mindset of being, feeling into being the best version of yourself. 

Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. We can't let a shitty cloudy day ruin our days particularly as the weather is not in our control.  A hundred percent. Can we start off by telling us a little bit about yourself?  Yeah, sure. I essentially host and run a community of thousands of men. So in a previous world, I built an architectural business, I built it to multiple seven figures, I had a team of 20 people, I won multiple awards for it, we owned a building, I had tenants in the building I did all the things that I thought I wanted to do in my 20s.

I achieved everything that I thought I wanted to achieve. All the hedonistic, the Rolex watches, the fast cars, the big house in the country, all the fun stuff, all the good stuff. I like.  I still, and I still thoroughly enjoy that stuff. I love a fast car, love a nice place. However, it took me to a very dark place.

It took me to a place of, essentially  seeing the dark night of the soul. I think it's coined some people might even call it midlife crisis. I am currently in my late thirties. This all happened in my  early thirties  and and through that, I was able to take a different direction, a direction.

I like to call route B a direction that my my old business partner and all my old team members frowned upon my, even my wife frowned upon my ex wife frowned upon,  and my mother frowned upon why are you doing this? You've got these amazing things. You've built a great business. You've built a great life.

Why on earth are you just going to explode that all and destroy it and go and do something completely different. But I knew deep in my soul that I need to do that. And it was my time.  So here I am today and now lead. Oh, I don't lead. I am with all the guys. I'm in the gutter with all the guys, doing all the work with all the men.

There are thousands in our groups. I have hundreds of clients. And and we travel the world with each other and we do the deep psychological ma the work that embodies our manhood. That's what we do. The  Dark Knight of the Soul.  I know that I've personally been through I'd probably say it several times on different occasions, usually after a breakup,  but  I always found that Dark Knight of the Soul was the catalyst which helped me to come out of it a thousand times better. 

Can you talk about your, what was it particularly that happened, the Dark Knight of the Soul, and how did you particularly break out?  Okay. Yeah, it's like  through adversity  through the pain,  there is growth.  If you choose to see it,  you can absolutely go through adversity, you can absolutely go through pain and not grow from it.

And just continue in the ways that you've always been doing, right? And then repeat the patterns we, us humans, we like,  we repeat the same patterns over and over,  but if we're willing to, if we're willing to be open to change and to growth,  and growth is a huge value of mine it's probably my  biggest core value. 

It is, it's gross. I'm always willing to be open to I don't have this figured out and something is guiding me, and I'm open to something guiding me whatever that is,  for me right now, that's spirit, for someone else it might be God, the universe,  The Flying Spaghetti Man, whatever you want to believe in I think it's good to have that.

 And I've had many a time when I've met the Dark Knight  and  That particular one, and I would call it like, like yesterday. So where I was I was living over in Oxfordshire in the countryside, super, super fortunate. I had a big piece of land,  a lovely home and opposite my land there was woodlands, it's thousands of acres of woodland and I'd walk through it and I'd never see anyone, I'd just see.

Dears and all these sorts of different types of birds. I've got my binoculars I used to love it right and i'd walk that walk a hundred times  And, on this particular time, which was September three years ago and I was, it was actually a very similar sort of day to what it is today.

It was like, quite gloomy, but it was, it's not raining, and it's quite, it's quite brisk.  And, I took a walk with my dog, so I got a Staffordshire. Bull terrier.  I, and it's my dream dog too. I've always wanted this dog. I took a walk with my dog and  I felt incredibly lost on the walk. Even though I walked that walk a hundred times, I felt incredibly lost.

 What's going on? I've got I've got all these things going super well for me.  Yeah. I feel lost. I feel incredibly isolated. I don't truly know what I want. And I can absolutely see that there's like all this There's so many boyish tendencies that I am that I'm acting out frequently  in my work, in my relationship, in my lifestyle, that I know isn't congregant to who I am,  and I know it's not right. 

And it was a point of confusion and I was extremely lost. But it was a catalyst. It was absolutely a catalyst for the, for my change. And literally three months later, I quit my own business.  And a year after that, I got divorced.  So a lot happened in a very short amount of time.

To answer your question of like how I began to get through that.  It's like  we seek answers externally,  so let's go and do things externally. All the answers are inside and that and that's what it involves. And it's, it can be difficult for us guys to really sit  and pay attention to what's going on inside of us. 

That is, it's incredibly hard because our monkey mind, our brains and we're thinking so many different thoughts  and I've got this thing to do and that thing to do and what about this and it's it's the  internal avoidance, right?  I call, we call this we call this part X. It's the part of us that wants to keep us safe essentially in keeping us safe, it keeps us small,  but it's the part of us that wants to keep us safe. 

And we've had this part and we will always have this part of us.  And  what is that, what essentially what it's doing is when these moments of growth can come up for us, the part X will come up  and get in our way, do anything for us to avoid it.  Super simple example.  Many of us go through,  say you want to start the gym or you want to start a health routine or right?

And  you say, I don't, you know what I'm going to do, I'm going to go in the morning. I'm going to get, I'm going to get up earlier too. I've been saying for ages, I'm going to get up early. I'm going to get up at five in the morning. I'm going to go to the gym,  set your alarm clock, 5. 00 AM, 5. 00 AM comes around, alarm goes off. 

It's cold outside because UK it's winter  and that voice in your head. Let's do it tomorrow. Do you know what? You actually had a really tough day yesterday,  right? You had a lot going on. You actually, you probably need to rest. Why don't you stay in bed for another hour?  Yeah, makes sense. Stay in bed for another hour, right? 

Then it escalates, you don't go to the gym. Then you get up, normal day, grab your coffee, go to work whatever. Come 10, 11am, what's the voice in your head saying?  James you idiot. Why didn't you go to the gym? You said you're gonna do it. You didn't do it. Why did that again? That's it's part X playing it playing at you.

It's that part in that's inside of you. It's playing at you It doesn't want you to change Just want us to stay the way that you are because that way it can control you and can keep you safe  So actually for us guys the more that we are able to Tune into that inner voice the one that's trying to keep us safe You and that should go out, actually is this. 

the boy in me or is this the man in me?  Is the, is this actually congregant to me growing or is it just trying to keep me small?  And ask questions around that.  Yeah become curious.  So  the people out there who perhaps have this fear that  they know that things are bad for them, such as maybe there's a job or a relationship which isn't working, but their fear, what could happen if they do it?

What kind of advice do you give to them? 

Be aware, be safe. 

Okay.  Where I'm now in London,  I have a beautiful balcony, literally just to my right and it's overlooking London. It's pretty high up.  If I stand on the edge of that, fear's gonna kick in actually. And fucking rightly if I stand on the edge of that and I look over, like rightly 'cause if I fall off that I'm gonna die. 

If I go into,  I'm actually going to Africa next month. So I'm Alan. We're gonna, doing a safari. We're tracking predators. Let's say I go home and track predators next month and I come face to face with a lion,  right? Fear will kick in and all the adrenaline and rightly like these are like life or death  situations,  right? 

Let's just bring it back to our day to day lives.  Hey, I'm gonna go and ask the pretty girl for her number. And the fear kicks in.  Am I gonna die if she says no?  No, it's a form of rejection. I just, I get rejected.  I say, and that out there is the deeper fear, is the rejection.  It's, I haven't died from it.

She says no.  I feel rejected.  But then why do I feel rejected? And it's about getting into the nuance of that. Okay, I feel rejected. What's beyond that?  Is it, is that damaging my self worth?  And why is that damaging my self worth? Because a random girl said no to me.  Okay, it's let's take it into the workforce.

Into a career path. Hey, I'm gonna, I'm gonna quit my job and start a new business.  It's not life or death.  Really? Because let's be honest. We, and we, and this is the thing. We are so fortunate in our Western world because the government would bail us out. Society, the council would bail us out. 

Our friends, our moms, our dads there's a whole high likelihood that someone  is going to bail us out if it goes to shit.  And I've absolutely learned, I've built a few businesses now. Some have gone really well. Some have gone okay.  The,  As soon as you face the fear, it's never as scary as you first thought it was going to be.

Ever.  So fear, fear in our modern world is absolutely safe. And the way to get around fear  is just to breathe.  It's just to breathe into it.  So when the fear comes up,  In your belly, in your heart wherever you're feeling in your body, it's actually to breathe into that fear. 

And as soon as you start breathing into it, it will start to disperse.  Honestly, it will.  Fear isn't something for us to be fucking scared of. Yeah, we're gonna, standing on the balcony or we've got a lion opposite us.  Yeah that's when it should really kick in,  but not in our day to day world. Again, it's part X. 

It's the part X that's to go no, don't do that. Let me keep you safe.  Don't ask the girl for a number just in case she rejects you or don't leave your job just in case you can't get another one.  Let me just keep you safe. Let me keep you exactly where you are.  You want to use part X as a barometer.

When the fear comes up,  the fear is here. This is actually a signal for me to lean into that  because on the other side of fear is always growth. 

I see it. So  I'm pretty in tuned with my in my body. So when I know that I'm starting to feel fear, I  allow myself to feel it. But then you get the power as well to choose whether you start to feel courage.  And to really step into that courage and to really go and to challenge yourself to do whatever needs to be done.

So one of the things that I've done the last couple of years is started to go dancing.   It's called Ecstatic dance. And there's no, no drugs, no drink.  It's a sober kind of dance environment. And dancing used to be one of my biggest fears.  But the first couple of times, there's this idea that you're petrified.

You're looking around at people, are people judging me? And  But then the more that I did it, the more that I was able to step into my own self. And it's more now where I would, when I'm going to these events, I'm I'm the real me, I'm dancing, I'm moving, I'm allowing my body to express itself.  And so there's this whole idea that as soon as you step into your yourself, into your body, you become you become powerful, you become the true part of yourself. 

With fear,  if you think about this on levels of consciousness,  fear is very low down on the levels of consciousness. So just like the tables of consciousness. Okay. So right at the very bottom is we've got shame. If we are feeling in shame we are probably at our very lowest. 

completely at our lowest.  I work with guys and we know that the rate on suicide for men is extremely high. It's four times out of women. And it's it's in guys of my age, our age, it's the biggest killer.  And  thousands of reasons why men go there and why they do that.  But for them, the, like they're typically their core motion whilst when that's happening is shame and it's right at the very bottom and above, just above shame is guilt  and we've got apathy, you've got grief,  and then we start going up the ladder or just above grief.

is fear.  So like for us to feel fear, it's a real low emotion for us. It's a real low level of consciousness. The longer we are in that, the lot that actually we're lowering our frequency we're lowering our essence. We want to get out of  fear as soon as possible.  And sometimes like you rightly said, it's like you jump straight into courage.

So I've got fear. If I just take, I take the pill of courage, you've jumped way up the ladder. Like courage is much, much higher on the levels of consciousness. Like you feel empowered when you're feeling courageous,  because courage, once you've embodied some courage, you do the thing, what do you then get?

Confidence.  It's like I'm actually confident in my dancing now and I don't, I've just let go of all that and now I feel phenomenal. Not so long ago there was fear.  Sometimes it can be quite difficult to go from fear straight to being courageous. It's, sometimes we can do it, boom, just like that, other times we can't.

So one little tip here.  Is to move just slightly up the table and go into desire.  So I'm feeling some fear right now. And the desire isn't a great emotion. We don't want to stay in desire for too long because we can become very needy and lustful. And we don't want to stay there too long, but if we go I'm feeling fear  about quitting my job. 

To go and start another one.  What's my desire? Actually, if I was to then start my own business,  I could earn more money. And then with more money, I could have more freedom and choice. So now we get it just start desiring that. Absolutely. So we're just moving up very slightly.  And then we can think about stepping into something like being courageous.

The other way, this, and this works, this does work with females, I know it works I know it works with men, because I experienced this myself, and I tell guys to do this if we're feeling in fear,  get angry,  get fucking angry, because anger is a higher emotion, it's a higher emotion than desire, it's a higher emotion than fear,  get angry.

So feeling a little bit fearful, fuck it, get really, fuck it, get, you can even get angry at yourself. Why the fuck am I still in this job?  Why do I fucking do this to myself? And actually get the emotions of anger inside of you. It puts you up. Because when you're in anger,  in this environment, it's safe, you're more likely to go and take a courageous action. 

Fuck it. Notice his hand. I bought bullet notices in, done it you actually, if you're more likely to be, to, 'cause that's the key here, is that we don't wanna stay in the emotion for too long. We want to take action.  Sometimes. We haven't got the courage to do that. So go into desire  and then, or you or jump into anger, right?

And then and then take a leap of courage and act. And act right. The more that we do that, the more that you raise your level of consciousness.  That makes sense.  It's absolute complete sense because I, yeah, I think sometimes, I suppose I've been on this path for seven, eight years now, and  I find it easy to move up, but you're right.

When somebody is perhaps feeling shame or feeling guilt,  going up from guilt to courage is going to be pretty pretty hard. And yeah, it's gradually moving yourself up, up the yeah, moving yourself up. 

 COVID was a couple of years ago now.  And at the time of COVID, this is like how powerful like your own consciousness is.  During the time of COVID what was the nation, pretty much the whole, the nation's level of consciousness? It was fear.  No one knew what was going on. We were worried about our, we were worried about ourselves, we were worried about our families, our parents, our grandparents, and so on and so on.

No one had a scooby what was going on. There was,  and it, how powerful, like the whole nation, pretty much,  say 90 percent of the nation, was at some stage in a real state of fear.  And what were we, no one knew what to do everyone was just going, yeah, I'm just going to abide by the rules, most people, 90 percent of people, abide by the rules, abide by whatever the government is saying, we're in a state of fear, we don't know what to do. 

But then,  some people start getting fucking angry with it. There were like riots kicking off, there were people kicking off all over the internet. I'm not, I don't agree, I don't agree with this, I don't agree with all these vaccinations, screw this, da. People were getting the, people were changed, many people were just starting to, even myself I started to get angry at it because it was restricting me in so many ways,  and it was like,  so many people then actually moved into the emotion of, and the consciousness of anger,  state changed, then action started happening.

People were going, nah, screw this, we're going out. We're getting on with our lives,  right? You stay in a state of fear for too long, you don't do anything. You stay still. In fact, you just go backwards. 

So I can imagine there's been times when  you've had big obstacles in the way or things have happened throughout your life.  How did you personally overcome these kinds of things? Let me think about  an example. Okay.  My,  so my last business the business I talked about earlier, I actually humongous obstacles in the way there.

Really. I'm a director of a company. I have lots of I, I have assets under my name. I've also got liabilities under my name. I've got huge responsibility. I have big team. I've got physical assets. I'm also, I've signed legal agreements and so on. There's many obstacles getting in the way of me going I'm just going to leave and go and do my own thing.

There's extreme obstacles here,  but the obstacle is always the way. And the way I look at obstacles is that it is absolutely a test. For me to get through. It's a test. It's like I said earlier, someone's guiding me or something is guiding me. I know deep to my core, someone, something, it's not me. 

Cause it's I have intuition to go and do something. I had intuition to go, do you know what? I'm going to leave my business and go set up another business.  Where on earth did that intuition come from?  I don't know and I could keep going yeah, but the intuition came from me making a plan But yeah, but where did that the intuition to make that plan come? 

I'm guided and every time an obstacle is in my way like all these legalities that were there in my way It was a test for me to go. Hey Pete, you want your next level of life? Here's a bunch of tests Let's see if you get through them Because if you can't, you're not ready for it yet.  Maybe one day you will be, but right now you're not. 

So every test that I'm given, every obstacle that I'm given, I just reframe it like that. This is a test. It's not, yeah, it's an obstacle, but it's just a test. Am I willing  to go outside my current paradigms  and go outside my current belief systems and so on  to get over the obstacle?

All. I'm just going to stay where I am. Yeah. When  am I, if you go back to, you said about your value being growth,  minds change.  The last seven to eight years, it's been continual change.  What I thought was going to be my business of PT and nutrition ended up being within a few years, change direction again, and then change direction and change direction.

And I feel as though it's more as I change and grow.  Where I'm heading changes and grows,  and it's that idea of trusting and having so another one of my of course, values is belief. And so it's believing and trusting that whatever's happening, it's happening for my own good and for the best. 

It's that kind of idea that  within us, we've got this guidance system  and that knows exactly where to take us.  So if I use an example, I remember being in this woodland by yourself, and I was I got to a point where I was lost, and I was like, okay,  which way do I need to go?  And I dropped myself out of my head into my body.

and allow my body, which is like a bit of gradual pull, and I went across the direction of this path and I got to exactly where I needed to go. 

And it's all down to faith, all down to faith, belief, and change and growth and yeah. How do you personally define a healthy man? 

How do I define a healthy man? Okay,  I define a healthy man that has embodied his full  Masculine essence. And by that, this is what I mean.  'cause that can sound like a load of mumbo jumbo.  The,  if we just take, if we take this back to archetypes  and we, and there's, we have.  hundreds, thousands of archetypes. 

But for us as humans, and this is a Jungian perspective that I I like the way that you talked about this, is that for us as humans, four core archetypes. Number one  is the self. This, the self is essentially where we want to go. Okay this is our authentic self.

This is who we are as a human being. And I'll get back onto that in a second. The second archetype is your ego. The second, this is your persona. The ego is essentially the masks that we're putting on day to day from when we were born all the way up to where we are now. And we're putting on these masks essentially because we want the world to like us.

We want to be accepted. We want the world to like us. And so we go through life and our parents say one thing, so we agree with them, and our teachers say another thing, so we agree with them or disagree with them, whatever that looks like, and we are always putting these masks on.  But what these masks are doing, they're taking us further and further away from our true self, our core identity.

 That makes sense. Yeah. Okay. The second part of this, or third part of this, sorry, is anima and animas, which is your masculine and your feminine. This is the, Every woman has masculine within her. And we are talking about energies here. This is like that a woman can have drive, direction, assertiveness, can go and take action, right?

Which is predominantly associated with the masculine. The same with the masculine, like a man, he can have and should have feminine energy, which is, that's the love, that's compassion, that's empathy, that's being vulnerable, that's being soft, okay? 

Fourth is your shadow.  The shadow being that  this is the things that we suppress. We think that the world doesn't want it. Maybe we're bullied at some stage. Maybe our parents said no to us at some stage. Maybe a teacher disciplined us at some stage. And we go, okay, I shouldn't do that. I'll repress that.

I'll suppress it into my shadow.  And there's two parts to this. It's our greatness.  So it could be that, maybe at school you're super arty, maybe you're super creative, but you're doodling in your maths book  and the maths teacher said, hey, James, don't do that. Stop drawing. This isn't the time to draw  because you're a young boy.

Maybe you took that the wrong way. And put your creative side into your shadow. So you can also put your greatness into your shadow. You also, you can also put all the, all your anger and your rage, and maybe as men, a lot of emotion into our shadows.  Okay.  What we want to be able to do. So what an embodied masculine will do is to integrate all those together.

So he will be opening up his shadow and looking into it and revealing it and doing the work there to integrate all of his darkness and all of it. And on all this light, all of his greatness into himself,  his masculine and his feminine, he will get the yin and the yang together. He'll embody both. 

They have to harden and they have to soft  and then his ego,  he would doing all of the work to remove all of his masks, all of his bullshit to truly get back to his S like who he is as a person, like his true self. And this isn't just, this isn't like a 60 day course or 90 day course or a year's course.

This is a lifetime of work because we are ever evolving. But this is a man being able to lean into doing all that work  that's.  My definition of  what a man should be, as the guy that's leaning into doing all of that and not ignoring it.  There's quite a lot there, isn't there, really, to be talking about.

But,  yeah, there's  Obviously, let's just talk about the faces.  We I feel as though when we were growing up, we put these faces on to protect ourselves.  But then,  I think people hit an age, whether it's 30s or 40s, and they start to realize that these faces that they have no longer serve them.  And so then it's finding ways, how can we then now start to remove these faces?

And start to express our true entity, our true selves, and  I've just come from a dance retreat and part of and parcel of the retreat is about taking away them faces that we have.  And sometimes it's easy when you're around the right people. It's easy then to start to drop the faces and so one of the things I've noticed you talk about is having the tribe and also discipline, it's been able to remove the faces.

start to bring in the masculine and feminine, which is big  and  starting to really connect. I start to feel the way that I start to center myself in my own body. And when I start to send to myself, I can start to breathe the real me.  Yeah. Which is ideal. Yeah. And what you said there a second ago about tribes are extremely important for men.

If you think centuries and centuries ago, men were in tribes,  we would go out and we would hunt as packs of guys to go and bring food for our family.  Like we were born into tribes.  Now, nowadays, it's wear a fucking medal doing it on your own. It's be a lone wolf.

It's like it's popularized. To go into monk mode and hustle and just get in a gym and work on your own and just, and it's just bullshit. It's just so it's just crap.  It really is. It's like the blind leading the blind  and  men find themselves on their own. And it's they, and some massively, it's their ego going off.

Just do this on my own. I don't need anyone else. I don't need support.  I go and conquer the world on my own. But if you think about it, but you think about the greatest companies in the world,  there's teams all about teams. You think about the most high performing unit in the world, the Navy seals.

It's a team,  it's all, you think about lone wolves, what do lone wolves do in the woods?  They die a lone wolf, whereas, whereas, like packs of wolves, they're there as a pack, they look after each other. It's the same with us guys need their packs, they need their tribes. And when you are around a powerful, conscious,  very strong tribe, you grow.

It's inevitable. You cannot help but grow because they will, they'll highlight your weaknesses and they'll fucking push into your strengths.  And it's, and like what you just said earlier about  being able to take off your masks and your faces. And  when you see other guys doing that and they articulate the way they're doing that, and they talk about the way they're processing whatever's going on in their mind and their heart and their body, and  you see someone else do that literally next to you. 

Gives you the power to do it too. God, just literally witness the guy do that. If one man can do it, so can another man. 

Yeah. Nice.  Can you talk about discipline and how discipline can have an important part in how we start to change our life?  Yeah. Here's the thing is that we all want freedom.  Everyone wants some form of freedom, time, freedom,  financial freedom in relationships.  Freedom.  Freedom comes with a couple of things.

Number one, it comes with absolute responsibility.  It comes with one hundred, but you have to take responsibility.  Hey,  let's just quit, let's just quit our jobs and go and start a new business.  Because we want financial freedom. Who's going to bring the money in?  Whose responsibility is that now? It's mine.

It's yours. It's no one else's.  It's  You have to embody the responsibility,  and the day that you realize that no one's coming to save you, it's only you.  You stop blaming other people, you stop waiting for someone to come and rescue you.  You stop being a victim to whatever circumstance you're in, and you take responsibility for it.

The freedom starts to come. It's all freedom of the mind.  But to get freedom, we've got to be disciplined. And I see this a lot with guys, I don't like being disciplined, I just want to go with the flow.  Discipline gives you freedom. Discipline gives you flow.  Absolutely having the structure to be disciplined absolutely gives you that.

There's three types of discipline to think about, and to embody.  Man, woman.  Number one is your structural discipline.  These are your protocols,  your processes. This is your morning routine, your evening routine.  This is you're getting up and you know exactly what you're doing. Bomb.

It's structured. There's some structure to it.  It's like you think about businesses, a big business. They have structured meetings.  And then within that meeting, they have structure within that meeting. This is how the meeting is going to run. So it's optimized. We know that every single Monday at nine o'clock, we have our sales meeting and this is where we run it. 

And every Friday we have our review meeting and this is how we run it. And so on and so there's structure and a structure within companies and companies grow. This is what we need. We need structure in our lives. So that's structural discipline.  Number two is reactive  discipline.  So reactive discipline is moment to moment. 

Do we respond or do we react to whatever's coming up,  right? So like right now we're having a conversation or late later on,  things are going to happen during your day. And these are moments. And you can choose to react in a negative way or way that doesn't  contribute to your growth,  or you could respond in a positive way and go, actually, this is going to contribute to my growth.

Maybe you have an argument later with your partner. And so are you reacting in a way that's going to see that your relationship grows?  Or not it's for it's reactive discipline this is really this is like the next level up it's harder to get because it's literally moment to moment to moment  okay  and the third discipline which is top level mastery level is expansive discipline  meaning that  we have big visions in our lives so say we want the financial freedom we want the time freedom or the relationship we want all the freedoms this is a big vision for us to get that  in that And then we're moments a moment to moment.

We're reacting or responding, but this is where we get mastery with it is moments a moment. Are we expanding or detracting?  So moments a moment, the decisions that we're making, are they aligned with our big vision to expand us into the big vision?  Or are we just thinking completely logically and just oh, we're just going to respond how I've always responded.

And then our growth stays very stagnant.  Whereas if you can master expansive logical thinking moment to moment, your life fucking grows exponentially. There's an example I want to bring up while we're talking about this. So talking about the expansive and de expansive discipline.

I work two days currently on my dad's farm and at this moment in time that's what's bringing my money in. Now I have a choice whether I allow working on the farm to make me feel angry, to make me feel lost or that kind of feelings, the negative emotions,  or I have a choice to really allow myself to be grateful that I have a job.

At this moment in time to be grateful for having nice surroundings to be able to interact with my parents. And so what I'm feeling between the two is that in the past there's been a times where I've been a bit upset with myself, annoyed that I can't get away quite yet.

And that's bringing me down so it detracts my own expansiveness.  Whereas when I get into the state of being happy and being loved, and being in that state of love, being in that state of gratitude, it expands me out. So then, because I'm expansive, I'm able then to come up with other ideas.

I'm able to come up with solutions to what to get away. But when I'm in that kind of detractive mindset, it's I'm almost in a self pity mode.   It goes back to the levels of consciousness,  right? When you're feeling detractive, when you're feeling anger,  feeling fear,  You're feeling a bit of  grief, maybe I'm fucking I'm grieving over that I'm actually, I'm working on a farm rather than doing, I don't know, something much bigger than this.

There's lower levels of consciousness, whereas when, what you just said there about leaning into gratitude, it's actually, you're leaning into acceptance. Acceptance, and then you're moving up into love. It's like the highest at the very high level there on our levels of consciousness.

And everything opens when we're in that state.  Yeah, it's the point I wanted to bring up is we have a choice. We might not be able to currently control the current circumstance. In fact, we can't control the circumstances. But we have a choice where we sit in the current circumstances. So whether we feel detracted or whether we feel expansive. 

Absolutely.  That's it. That is that's what Viktor Frankl said. That's it.  We talk about freedom. We have the ability to have freedom. Man's greatest freedom is in the moment to moment, within that moment, there is a gap.  And in that gap, you have a choice.  That's our, that is our freedom. We have a choice. 

We might not be able to control the weather right now, but I do have a choice as to whether I'm going to get pissed off that it's raining or whether I'm going to go, I love the rain.  I have a choice, right? We have a choice. And that's the, and that is man's greatest freedom.  Yeah, definitely.

That's where our power is. Our power is in the things that we choose.  So just quickly, let's go back to the disciplined the structured discipline, because obviously there's, public people out there who might be struggling at this moment in time. How can they start to create some more structure in their life? 

Okay. Don't go from zero to a hundred.  Don't start at step 16. This is I want all the structure in my life and start having all these crazy plans and then start with  I'm going to have this I'm going to have the amazing six pack or I'm going to have the amazing business, or I'm going to have all this time off, whatever that looks like.

And actually that step like 37  is about starting with step number one and going super small with it and go, okay where's the easiest way for me to just create some structure in my life?  I, and I always with guys, let's get the disco foundational. Let's just go foundations, right?

Because if your foundations aren't right, it's shaky  and it's always your health always,  before, before we do anything big and crazy, it's always health, it's always two things three things,  EMS, eating, moving, sleeping,  because once you get that in order you start, you begin to optimize your energy  and when you have energy,  you have more willpower you're willing to be disciplined, you're  You have more energy to go out and do things when you don't have the energy when it's hard to get up in the morning.

It's hard to walk up a flight of stairs. You feel sluggish because of the fucking bowl of cereal and whatever that you ate. It's like, why do I keep feeling tired at 10 o'clock?  Maybe it's the maybe it's the lack of energy that's going through your body. And it's get that once you get that then it's up.

Now we can start working on the other areas of discipline. So as always,  get out of the gym. Start simply,  whether it's 30 minutes, three times a week, just simple. Whether it's going for a walk every day, it's simple. It's just building some form of structure around that until it becomes a habit, until it becomes like, oh, this is the, I'm not like I actually saw a photo came up of me on my Instagram 10 years ago.

It's literally, it's a 10 year photo.  And I looked at the comparison between then and now. I look, my body looks the same.  I'm actually, I'm a little bit bigger now,  but  very good condition.  And and by, and this isn't natural to me. If I was to stop going to the gym and just, and stop eating healthy, I would look like a sack of shit.

I know I would put, I would put on weight. I wouldn't look great,  but the way I see it, this isn't a diet, I'm not on a diet, this is just, it's, health is such an intrinsic value to me, it's just a way of life, and because of that, it's just who I am, and I'm always healthy, I'm always in great condition, I just done two hours of Jiu Jitsu earlier, yesterday I did yoga, and I did the gym, I just, I love to do that. 

But I cultivated that over time. I just kept doing it more and more. And then it just became intrinsic to my identity.  Yeah. I I've joined the CrossFit probably about two years ago and  in my twenties, I was doing heavy weights,  but. Over the last year, we've been, I'm almost 40 now, and it's got to the point where I'm just I'm doing the same weights I was doing in my 20s, and I'm almost 40. 

And it's that idea of, I said, cultivating your health, gradually working  and growing. Yeah I've actually never done CrossFit, a bit, but I recommend it to so many guys,  who aren't in the best condition, and they want to get fit. Yeah go and join CrossFit,  because You get the community aspect and you get the accountability aspect.

And it's you get, it's a real team effort.  And it will get, yeah. And it, there's, it gets a little crap because it can get you injuries and so on, but so could law. I've just done jiu jitsu this morning. My leg is absolutely killing me. Cause some guy kicked me like shin kicked and it freaking hurts.

But whatever you're doing, there's always some, there's always some risk of whatever you're doing. You do nothing. You're at bigger risk, catching obesity and all sorts of issues.  Absolutely. Crossfit's amazing for man, woman to get into.  Yeah, definitely. Can you talk about awakened man?

What you run.  Yeah, so we, I essentially run two programs,  two things to help guys. The first is Heroic Man,  and Heroic Man is the reboot. This is for the guy who's maybe been kicked a little bit, or he's doing well, he just wants to do better. Wants to get into self development  and he just said, so heroic man is essentially the entry and starter into self development, even if you've been doing it for a number of years, because this is based around masculine development.

So it's extremely different to the traditional  things you might see in the marketplace and it's to essentially reboot.  Reboot your masculinity and to get clear on what that looks like from boy energy versus man energy  in your relationships, in your bank balance and in who you are as a man, right?

That's and so that's heroic man.  Awakened man is the mastery level. This is for guys that want to go very deep in understanding their own psychology. They want to understand their beliefs, their behaviors, and why they do the things they do. They want to understand, and not just intellectualize understand, but embody, at a deep level, their emotions,  their behaviors, their blocks, their resistance, their fears. 

And in understanding and embodying that work, they become this fucking powerful man. Because they cannot, like, when a guy is so confident in who he is as a man and knows exactly what he wants and where he's going,  he's got certainty.  It's extremely  attractive. It's extremely attractive to the opposite sex.

It's extremely attractive to the people around him. His team members, his colleagues, his friends, his family,  right? He becomes a man that is doing something with his life. He's got life force.  That's the awakened man.  No, it's like it.  Is there anything else that you run and can you tell us a little bit about it?

I consult with businesses. I, my previous business we did well there. My superpower is.  Leadership processes, systems, operations, being able to see the matrix and being able to see where the constraints are very quickly in a company. And not only coach the founder to become the, because it's the thing is like you can have a business and it'd be doing okay, but if the founder  isn't psychologically in the right place, or he's got money mindset issues, like he will block the growth of the business. 

So I'm very good at coaching the founder through his bullshit, as well as seeing the constraints in the company.  And then we fix the constraint, make sure the founders in the right place to actually lead the business. It's all about, it's all about self leadership. Once it gets part, once it gets past seven figures, getting seven figures is easy enough.

Cause it's just just do the same thing over and over. Once you get past the millions, it's then it's all self leadership. It's all internal for guys.  A coach and consulting companies doing that. 

 very much, Pete. It's been an absolute pleasure.  My pleasure, mate. Good to chat.