The Shocking Truth About Diabetes—and the Mindset Shift That Could Your Life

Diabetes Doesn’t Define You: Mindset, Motivation & the Power to Take Control 

In this powerful episode of Man: A Quest to Find Meaning, we dive deep into the emotional and physical journey of living with type 1 diabetes. Our guest, Simon McKee, shares how one journal entry transformed his mindset, leading him from denial and self-destruction to clarity, discipline, and empowerment.

Diagnosed at just three years old, Simon spent decades battling anger, shame, and neglect of his condition. But everything changed when a red flag moment forced him to face reality—and find a new way forward. From struggling with alcohol and avoidance to embracing radical discipline, Simon’s journey reveals how mindset can literally save your life.

We talk about the importance of deep motivation, emotional release, and self-compassion. Simon opens up about how journaling, therapy, and a life-changing consultation with Dr. Bernstein in the US led him to adopt a strict but life-giving lifestyle—proving that healing, and even reversal of damage, is possible.

Whether you’re living with a chronic illness, stuck in a self-sabotaging pattern, or simply feeling overwhelmed, this episode is packed with inspiration, practical mindset tools, and a powerful reminder: You are not your diagnosis—you are your decisions.

🎧 Tune in to hear:

• How to shift from “I can’t” to “What if I can?”
• The surprising link between emotion and physical health
• Why setting intentions and daily rituals are non-negotiables
• How to find your personal “why” to stay consistent

Join us on Man: A Quest to Find Meaning as we explore what it truly means to reclaim your health, identity, and purpose—one mindset shift at a time.

About Simon:

Born in Dublin and based in London since 1997, Simon McKee has lived with Type 1 diabetes for over 50 years — and hasn’t let it hold him back for a moment. A qualified accountant and change management specialist with over two decades in investment banking, Simon is also the founder of Diabetes Take Control, an initiative championing the emotional and psychological side of diabetes management.

Simon’s life reads like a highlight reel of resilience: he’s sailed two legs of an around-the-world yacht race — from Qingdao to San Francisco and then on to Jamaica. He’s trekked to Everest Base Camp, and ventured deep into the Arctic Circle with a team of huskies and a sledge. His passion for challenge and growth fuels his work, whether he’s delivering talks, mentoring others, or climbing literal and figurative mountains.

A keen traveller, rugby fanatic, climber, and active Toastmaster, Simon brings humour, insight, and lived experience to every conversation

Transcript

0:00

In this week's episode, we talk about everything, diabetes. We chat about how healing is possible and even reversal. We talk about how mindset is everything and how one journal entry changed everything for Simon. And so much more. Welcome to Man: A Quest to Find Meaning, where we help men navigate modern life, find their true purpose, and redefine manhood. I'm your host, James, and each week, inspiring guests share their journeys of overcoming fear Embracing vulnerability and finding success. From experts to everyday heroes. Get practical advice and powerful insights. Struggling with career, relationships or personal growth? We've got you covered. Join us on Man Quest to Find Meaning. Now, let's dive in.

James: 0:59

I am not defined by my diabetes. I am not defined by my diabetes. I am defined by my mindset. Good morning, Simon. Tell me more.

Simon: 1:13

Hey. Strong opening there, James. Yeah, it's I've been through quite a journey with my diabetes and one of the great things about it is that from a very young age, my mother was amazing in that she was always like, you're incredibly independent. You can do anything you want. You're as good as all the other kids, and you're gonna live a great life. And it got me in a mindset of you need to, the diabetes is there, you've gotta control it, you've gotta look after it, but it's gonna follow you. And literally, I have my hands behind my back as I'm doing that. It's gotta follow you and. If your mindset's right, you will allow that to happen because you've gotta control it, you've gotta be on top of it. But if you allow it to take over your life, it will, and you'll become a victim and it becomes a mindset that really will not help you and it won't benefit you at all. And even in my darkest days, and I've had quite a few, James, I've really struggled at points, but I've always said, this will not define me. It will live with me. It'll be part of me, but it's not telling me what to do. But I need to take precautions and I need to be aware that I am a diabetic and that with regard to that, I may need to take additional steps if I'm doing something a little bit crazy.

James: 2:36

Yeah. Yeah. This little bit will be edited out, but when you keep shaking the screen a little bit

Simon: 2:44

Oh, I do I?

James: 2:45

Yeah. It keeps shaking a little bit.

Simon: 2:47

Oh, that may be me banging on the table. Okay. That's it. Okay. I see it. Yeah, I see it.

James: 2:52

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's as easy as that. I can edit this bit out. Not a problem at all. It'll, the video might be a little ju dumb, but it's like seconds, right? Yeah. I think with mindset, if we talk on mindset generally, it's so important because if you allow what happens to you to define, you, say for example, you went for a bad situation or a bad breakup, a bad job, and you allow that to define you, then that can have a massive impact on the rest of your life. Whereas if you shift to changing your mindset on it and seeing yourself as the as the main character. Seeing yourself as the main character, that, that kind of mindset and suddenly you shift from what people, the people around you are affecting you to You define yourself.

Simon: 3:47

Yeah. Yeah. And it's quite important, like main character. That's a good analogy. Like in that you are the driver, you have choice. You can decide what you want to do, you can decide how you want to live, and that is incredibly important that when you're living with chronic diseases like diabetes, it can feel overwhelming. You can literally feel overwhelmed at points and you almost feel just I can't go on. And certainly I've had those moments, but it's really the ability to stop and just allow yourself to breathe and say, I have choice. I can move forward. It's not gonna be perfect day on day one, but we'll get there. And it's tough living with something like this because I. It's there 24 7. It is constant. It goes on holidays, it comes to bed with you. It's there when you wake up in the morning. It's there when you're fast asleep. It's constant. And with regard to that, you need to be aware that your mindset is in the right place because if you're not, it really does get on top of you. And once you become a victim and you know why me mindset, it's very difficult to shift that now. You can shift it. Absolutely 100%. And I've been in those dark sort of corners where I've been like, why the hell have I got this? Why did I do, why do I deserve it? But really it's in those moments that you really tap into that resilience. And diabetics literally, by their nature, will have a lot of resilience because living with this disease, it's tough. And even if you know whether you're type one or type two. Type two, you might just have a diet that you've gotta follow, but that's your regime. And literally by living with a regime on a consistent continual basis, it's a struggle. Now on my side, I do a minimum six injections a day. I used to do eight or nine blood tests a day. I now have a continuous glucose monitor. And living with that at times has been a real struggle. So that mindset and that ability to tap into those deep motivations that sort of, why am I here? What do I want to do? Why am I getting up? Know for example a couple of days ago I got up and the very first thing I do is I do, I check my blood sugars and then I do three injections straight away every day. I'd been doing that for 15 years and a couple of days ago I just got up and I was like, I don't wanna do this. Not today. I just don't wanna do it. And. I tapped into those deep motivations. And it was like, I wanna live a long and healthy life with my wife. I can't do that if I don't take these injections. I wanna have brilliant conversations with people I've never met again. I can't do that if I don't take these injections. And these are the motivations that sort of get you up on your feet, get you moving forward and get you in the right mindset. So I've used that for a long time.

James: 6:44

That's powerful. Deep motivations are super key. So it's nothing like diabetes, but I've had to, I've had a few teeth out because over the years I've, I love eating fruit. I've got a very sweet tooth and having. The teeth out had made me realize, and I've been told that I could end up like my nan with false teeth. And it's, it creates a thing image in your head thinking, I do not wanna go there when I'm 50. So it's that, that deep motivation to do something. But it's finding that deep motivation, I think is the key because a lot of people don't have that deep motivation that they need in order to accomplish what they want to accomplish. So we have a discussion about that later on, but can you tell us your story? How, what, how did you realize you it had diabetes and how's that impacted your life?

Simon: 7:45

So I was, I'm unique in that I was diagnosed with type one diabetes at the age of three. So my life before diabetes, I really have no knowledge of it. I've got a twin brother. So there was always a constant contrast between him and me. And with regard to that I just always remember, I remember my mom calling me in for dinner. We, myself and my brother and all the kids in the neighborhood would be out playing and I'd have to run in and she'd, sit down in her seat, she'd kneel me across her knees, pull my pants down and give me a shot and my bum. And that went on. So I, I was injecting my doing my own injections, probably I think about eight age, nine or 10 or something. And to be honest, she was incredible. She managed, she had, my oldest sister was, she's four years older than myself and my brother. And then I've got a si, a younger sister who's one and a half years younger. So it was like pretty much four kids and one of them with diabetes, and she was all over it. She managed all the meals, she'd weigh everything out. She'd give me exact proportions. Everything was measured against the intake of the insulin that I had, and my diabetes was incredibly well controlled. And then I started to take it over at the age of sort of 10, I was doing my own injections. And then maybe 13, 14, I was doing my own meals measuring my meals out. And she slowly introduced me and trained me into the process of living with diabetes. And by the age of 20, even before that, probably 15, I was running it pretty much from, from morning to night. And I also went to boarding school in Ireland. So I again had to control it myself. Now I was reasonably okay compared to my gold standard of my mother. I wasn't quite there. But I wasn't bad. And as I grew up and went to university and then I qualified became an accountant. I know. But I became an accountant and I initially did a bit of time in New York and then went to, or came to London. And when I came to London, I was, I think it was about 26, 27. I got a great job at a bank. I was earning way more money than I ever thought, or I knew what to do with, and I could suddenly start going out and doing all sorts of bits and pieces. Now this also coincided with, I used to do it playing awful lot of judo and rugby, and that stopped. Now, I didn't really understand the implication of this at the time. And it's only recently that I have got to get a comprehension around this, but that rugby in the judo. They were amazing venting processes that allowed that. The anger that I was carrying, again, which I was not aware of living with diabetes and I was deeply angry, but it, that venting and physicality allowed that venting process to release all this anger. But suddenly I got to London and I was no longer playing judo and I was no longer I shouldn't say playing, doing judo and or playing rugby. And the obvious thing was let's go out and have a few pints. And it started just a little bit like that, but then it did start to get outta control. And during my late twenties and thirties, I was probably drinking and I was using that as a coping mechanism. And it was using it really to help me manage my emotional state. Now, I certainly wasn't managing the diabetes at this stage, but I was using that to manage my emotional state. And with regard to that, I continued in that vein and really what I was doing, which is what a lot of diabetics I've talked to, certainly you got a problem, stick your head in the sand, don't do blood tests'cause they're always bad. You don't wanna do those.'cause that's just a reminder. You're outta control. So you stick your head in the sand and then get yourself a good coping mechanism, whether it's overeating, it's drinking, or whatever else it is. And I was living like that for quite a while. And I would go through emotional turmoil like where I had to go see the doctor and I was like, oh Christ and is gonna be a shambles. And I turned up to the doctor and he'd do these blood tests called a HBA one C, which is a three month average blood sugar. And that was the really, the gold standard. And of course he'd see that and he'd look at it and he'd go I get the nod and then it was into the parental sort of conversation like, you just can't continue like this. If you continue like this is what's gonna happen to you. You're gonna get liver disease, kidney damage, you're gonna get amputations, blindness. And I just sit there and I wanted to eviscerate him literally. And I just wanted to get the hell outta there as quick as I could. There were little reminders during the year and then also your blood tests. So every time I did a blood test sky high. Why? Because it was outta control. It was outta control. And I couldn't tell you why I was outta control. And I really didn't want to know. Stick your head in the sand, forget about it. Have another pint. And that was really where I was living and I had a red flag moment. So I was getting ready to take part in two legs of around the world yacht race. And I was going from China Qingdao across the North Pacific to San Fran and then San Fran via the Panama Canal to Jamaica. And as I was preparing, I just started just doing a little bit of personal grooming and I started clipping my nails my fingernails and I picked one of them up'cause it just looked a bit weird and I crushed it into a powder between my fingers. And doing that, I instinctively knew that's not right. That is not right. And I picked up another one and I just snapped it in half. There was no, it wasn't malleable at all as you'd expect a fingernail to be. And I knew that was the diabetes. And I also knew if you don't get on top of this you're goose. You are as good as gone. And I was 40. Now when I went sailing, I. I, I didn't I talked to my wife, Miriam, who is an amazing researcher, and I said, listen the current process that I'm involved in with regard to managing my diabetes doesn't work. It just doesn't work. And this wake up call, I was really quite frightened and I was quite worried and anxious about what's coming down the track next. And I had no way I couldn't see a way out. And I needed somebody else. I needed some help. And I said this to my wife and as I was crossing the North Pacific, I got an email and she said, I found this doctor in the United States, this guy called Dr. Bernstein. He's in upstate New York. He is a type one diabetic. And he has a very maverick approach to diabetes. And I booked him in and we were gonna see him for three days where you're gonna get retrained and we're there in August and. I went out to see this guy. I read his book and it's pretty hardcore. It's pretty heavy going, and actually I suffer from a bit of a DHD and trying to absorb some of this message was, yeah, it was pretty harsh. So I, I probably wasn't as prepared as he, he would've liked me to have been, but I turned up on day one and on Ruth, I got a sandwich, a big hero sandwich. So hero sandwiches are like they're New York's, they're just, they're just a big sub and they're great. And I turned up and he hit me with all the big ones on day one, and he said, you're starting these as of tomorrow morning. The first one was instead of doing three injections a day, I was now doing a minimum six instead of doing one or two blood tests every couple of days. Now to give you the equivalent of that's like driving a car with no steering wheel, right? You haven't got a chance. And you wanted me now to do eight a day and then my carbohydrates were gone. I was only going to eat protein and greens, right? Protein and greens, that's it. I'm Irish. I just do meat and potatoes, right? No potatoes, like my family's in shock. My parents in shock. My country is in shock, right? You just can't do that, right? And I don't eat vegetables or greens. Jesus. So I had to start eating greens. And then on top of this, he goes, I need you to record everything. And I use, actually, I just happen to have one here. There's a thing I call a glucco graft. And in here I record everything. I record when I get up, my blood sugar, what I insulin. I took what I had for breakfast. Everything gets recorded. Now I came from a shambles. Literally the only thing that I was constant at was my injections. That was it. Everything else was all over the place. I hadn't recorded a blood test, I don't know, probably 10 years. And suddenly this changed. I was like, I can't do this. And as he's talking to me, I started to think this doctor is obviously insane. His regime is insane. And I said to my wife when he went to the toilet, I'm outta here. And she convinced me to stay. And it's only day one or day three, right? So we're on a train from MA upstate New York, going back into Grand Central. And then we were staying with my sister in Brooklyn. And as we're taking the train down, I just, all I got, I just kept saying, I can't do this. I can't do this, I can't do this. I can't do all these injections. I can't not eat rice, potato, fruits, wheat, I can't do these blood tests. I can't record everything. And. I just, there, there was no website. There was just no website. And my wife, when we got back to Brooklyn, said to me, I want you to take this journal. And she gave me a pen and she said, I want you to go to that pub on the corner. It's a quiet pub. I want you to get a pint, and I want you just to write in the journal. And I went, okay. Now I did it more for the pint. But I said, okay. And I took the journal and the pen and I found myself writing. And what was I writing? I can't. And I listed all the stuff that I just can't do this. And I must've been writing for about 20 minutes and my hands started to cramp up. And as I sat up and I took a sort of a slug outta the pints, I suddenly found myself going, what if you could, what if you could do that? What if you could do those injections? What if you could do those blood tests? And I started to go from there to visualizing me actually doing this. And then I suddenly got to, what the hell do you want? What do you want outta your life? And I said, you're 40 years old and if you continue in the path you are on, you're gonna be dead probably at 50. And it's gonna be a very slow, insidious decline in your health and very painful. Or you can take this road and just get on with it now. Just get on with it. Probably not the best term. And certainly diabetics do not want to hear that term. So I sat and I just thought, and I allowed myself to immerse myself in this vision, and I kept saying, what do I want? And the following morning I got up and I started this regime. I've been doing this regime consistently for over 15 years on a consistent and continual basis. And the reason I'm doing it is because of the change in my mindset. And if that hadn't have happened in that moment, there's no way I would've been able to follow this. Because when you talk to doctors, most doctors with the exception, even not actually even Dr. Bernstein, he'll just tell you, you wanna control your blood sugars, you gotta control your diet, and you gotta control your medication. Simples, there's a huge element missing in that. And that's the mindset, that emotional state that you bring. Because if you're not in the right place, no matter how good it is, you will not follow it. And I got all sorts of little ticks that motivated me. I'd do a blood test and like when I used to do a blood test I had no idea what number was gonna pop up. I. Literally I would be, it could be I couldn't, I, if you gave me, if you said to me, I bet you a thousand pounds, you can guess what that number is within a range of sort of 10%. I wouldn't have a clue. It could be 20, it could be five, it could be 16. I wouldn't have a clue. But suddenly when I was following this regime, I do a blood test and I can actually say, I believe I'm gonna be 4.7 around there. And I was, and that suddenly, Jesus, I'm in control. I actually, I know what I'm doing. I know what makes this number move. I know how to control my health. And this started to really reinforce that change in mindset and say, you're on the right path. This is the right way to go. And it started me on quite a journey, an emotional journey. Which really it took a while for me to really and truly be convinced that his method was right. But man, he is bang on and this doctor, he is now 90 and when I go over and visit him, he's still working. And when I go over and visit him, he'll get me down on the floor and he'll pump out 10 pushups and he'll have me beside him. He's the oldest living diabetic in the United States, and he has all his limbs, no amputations, no issues. He's incredible. And this guy walks the walk and talks the talk. He understands. So he is been brilliant. This guy's literally saved my life and I never had a pension and now I'm wishing god damn, I should have had a pension because I'm gonna live a much longer life than I'd anticipated. And that's incredible. And really it's a message to diabetics If you. Get yourself in the right place. Look after the diet and take the medication. You can live an incredible life.

James: 22:34

Thank cues. It's a, it's an absolutely yeah, incredible journey that you've been on. But with regards, if we go back to when you had all the emotions running around to you, what particular emotions did you feel? Was it anger, was it frustration?

Simon: 22:54

Anger. Anger was ever present. And there was a little element of why me, and why do I have to deal with this? Just general anger with this thing. And that played into all sorts. So you'd get like a lot of self hatred, self-doubt, lack of self-confidence, and the self-loathing, because why don't you know if you don't care about yourself? Why would anyone else be bothered about you? If you are not willing to look after yourself, why should anyone else be bothered taking any sort of care with you? And why? Why are why are you like this? Why do you not care? Look at everyone else. They're going down the gym, they're doing this, they're doing that. And you're sitting on your backside. You're not even managing your diabetes. You don't even know how to control it. You're worthless. You're not good enough. You're not strong enough. And my God, you get into an emotional spiral. And this would go on probably for about 30 minutes every time I did a blood test. And at the end of it, I was exhausted. And then you'd go why would you wanna do another blood test? Just to reconfirm that your blood sugars are outta control, but you were living with those shadows and they were ever present all the time. And you'd use your coping mechanisms really to distance yourself from these emotions. You didn't wanna, you didn't wanna register this, it was just too painful. It was too hard. Lots of diabetics I know, like who I've talked to, go through the same thing. And then there's this constant,'cause diabetes is insidious. It's slowly destroys your cells and it's, it operates on a cellular level. It's not like it's attacking a muscle or something like that. It ap like it's at a cellular level, the lowest level you can get to in your body. And it's damaging your systems. And when it's not just damaging, it's not just damaging your eyes, it's damaging your kidneys, it's damaging your blood vessels, it's damaging your pancreat pancreas. It damages everything. Nothing gets away. And by the time, unfortunately, you've got a problem, you probably have lots of problems. And if you haven't got lots of problems, you have a lot of problems that are going to manifest very quickly.

James: 25:02

That just shows that if there's people out there who are perhaps going through that emotional state at this moment in time, that there is light at the end of the tunnel. And I think that's key. I think that's key. Knowing that as people have been there and done that and they've come out the other side and are living a nice, healthy, long life,

Simon: 25:26

your like, I can't tell you like my, your body is incredible. Your body, the pla plasticity and elasticity as I call it in your body, is incredible, right? You can mismanage your diabetes and if you get on top of it, you decide I'm gonna change and you get on top of it, you can reverse damage that's already been done. Now doctors will tell you that can happen, but my doctor in the US said this can happen and you will find as I did. When I used to go for eye checks, you'll find that they'll suddenly go, how did this happen? You seem better than you were. But our teachings have told us that, once you've done damage to the eye, that's it. You just, it doesn't reverse, but it does. And what would happen is I'd go see it one of the ophthalmologists, then he'd call his boss and he'd have a look and then he'd call his boss. And then eventually I'd end up with the head of the department and they'd go this is very strange. How did this happen? And I go this is because I control my diabetes. And in controlling it, you change your body. And your body is a, an incredible variable. It's constantly adapting. And if you feed it the right ntri nutrients and you look after it with, the insulin that I have to take, or just the medication, maybe metformin for type twos, you can change your life and you can live an incredibly long and healthy life. But don't con yourself if you're not looking after it. You will pay a price at some point. And that is because the disease is so slow and insidious. People think they're getting away with it. And really, when Covid kicked in, one of the biggest groups that were affected were type two diabetics who got wiped out, and a lot of'em got wiped out because they thought they were getting away with it. And suddenly Covid came along and it just gave them a lot of a push to knock'em off. And unfortunately, they, a lot of them passed away. And yeah, so it's in your head. You can convince yourself, this is, I'm all right, I got, maybe I got a little bit of tingling in my feet. That's neuropathy. Or, I got a little bit of this, or blurred vision. It'll be all right. There's, they're the telltale signs. This is where you need to start pulling back and saying, what do I want? Where am I going with this?

James: 27:51

It's a powerful mindset. Shift yourself. You said you've had, so the deep motivation the resilience, the the fact that you shifted from I can't do that to what, if I can. And I think it's not just people with diabetes here it's anybody, whether it's man or woman, having that mindset shift from I can't to, I can change everything

Simon: 28:20

massive. Ma massively. And it is interesting like I do. I, as we met with the PSA, the Professional Speaking Association I do a lot of talks on diabetes and I talk about that mindset shift and it's quite, what I find quite interesting is I'll have people who are attending with friends who are diabetics and they'll come up to me afterwards and go, wow. That, that strategy that you have is incredible because, I could use that to get a promotion in work, or I could use that to potentially ask somebody out on a date who I've struggled with, or I'm gonna do a 5K as well as diabetics grabbing hold of this strategy and go, I'm gonna take this and I'm gonna move forward with it, and I'm gonna change my mindset. Because I think as well, like when you have somebody who's gone through it and like I was in some dark places with the diabetes, and I have no doubt I would've been either dead at 50 or really in very bad health with probability of like amputation and that sort of stuff. Very imminent with, maybe a couple of years before I passed. So with the mindset, you can get on top of the diet, you can get on top of the the medication. But you gotta get that right. And Western Medicine doesn't look at that. There's nowhere I can find anywhere to help me with, that mindset change. And really, I wasn't even aware of it. And I'll put my hand up. Diabetics are amazing at hiding emotions, right? We take emotions and we stick them in a box and stuff them so far back in the deepest recesses of our mind, and we presume they'll never reappear. And sometimes in my workshops I'll joke and I'll say, in Ireland we don't have emotions. They just don't exist. They're not allowed to exist. And if you start talking emotionally, you can get arrested. So you just, you don't deal with anything emotional. And it's funny as I say that. People all over resonate. And I've had people all over the globe saying, it's not just the Irish, I'm French, I'm Jamaican, I'm African. So everybody resonates.'cause there's an element you gotta kinda man up or you gotta be the the alpha male, alpha female. So you just can't, this, just push it away. And that is very dangerous because you can sit on that and when you sit on it, you're causing your body huge amounts of damage. And it's almost I'd love to say, I will say go out and get somebody to talk to, get a therapist, get a counselor. They're not gonna be diabetic specialists, but at least talk to them because you need to get that stuff out. And a great example for me with that was when I went to see this doctor in the US he said to me, one of the biggest things you're gonna find is I'm gonna put you on a thyroid medication. Now in the uk, they would've said to me your thyroid medication's kind of normal, so you don't need it. And what he'd suggested is that actually the band for measuring normal range of thyroid is probably too wide and it should be narrowed. And if it is narrowed, diabetics would fall outside of the normal range. So he started me off on T three medication for thyroid. And it was like, as soon as I started, it was almost like my brain had hopped into it, had jumped out of some battered up fort Escort and jumped into a Ferrari. My mind was so much sharper and more, much more alert and in work, the change in work was phenomenal. I, I got two promotions very quickly as a result of this. I was just so much sharper. And initially I was I was just, I thought this was amazing. I. I suddenly then got incredibly angry. How the hell did nobody tell me about this? And I got to the point where I was like I've been working 20 odd years suboptimally because nobody told me about this thyroid medication that I should have been on. And I got so angry. I actually had to go see a therapist. And I talked to, I did a couple of sessions with her and I remember she said, why don't you record, a message? Just record just how you feel. And I recorded this sort of four or five minute message, and it was just full of expletives, like full of expletives. But I eventually gone over it. But this was a lot of the anger that was coming out, and this was only scratching the surface. I've done a lot more work since then on this. And it's, yeah, this, this stuff is buried so deep down that it's very easy just to sit on it for the rest of your life.

James: 33:11

I can absolutely imagine because as a whole, I feel men especially, not so much, I think women are a bit more open to emotions, but I feel men as a whole tend to push a lot of emotion down. And for me, myself, there's been times where I would push anger down and I would go out drinking. And when I'm drinking, suddenly my emotion, my anger would come up. So I'd be like, come on, let's get into a fight kind of thing. And I've had to realize that the way I was dealing with anger was very unhealthy.

Simon: 33:50

Yeah.

James: 33:51

And this is it. If you, when you suppress an emotion, it tends to. It tends to get stuck. It tends to create illnesses, it tends to batter our own organs. And I'll give you a perfect sample. It's this weekend just gone. I was dancing I said dance, and I was dancing so hard that I kicked my neck and I got, I've had a bad neck last few days. But what I did during a dance was that, okay, what is it about that crep neck that really wants to be let go of? And when I basically went into that that part of my body, it was anger and rage. And what I found was that initially I had the pain all the way down my back when I allow myself. Because in that, in the atic dance, one thing you can do is allow yourself to, to fent. Emotions.

Simon: 34:56

Yeah.

James: 34:56

So you can dance and you can go, ah, kind of thing. Why are you dancing? Obviously there's no physical violence, but you can allow yourself to let your voice be heard. So you can now go ah, or whatever comes out. You can cry, you can scream. Yeah. It's all part and parcel of the the dance and the whole concept around it. And what I did, and there's quite a few people join me, we all started shouting. We started going, ah, as loud as we could. And what I found was that the pain went from down there just to the top of my neck. And so it's a basically it taught me that we might have emotion, stuck emotion in our body and it might be affecting certain organs, but if we can allow ourselves to vent this emotion in whatever way we see po see fit, it can allow us to release. In a way that starts to heal it.

Simon: 35:54

Yeah. I like, I totally agree. Like when you're sitting on a lot of emotion, you are sitting on a ticking time bomb, right? And it's the same if you're not managing your diabetes. You are sitting on a ticking time bomb. At some point it's gonna go off. And those emotions as well. I totally agree. You get ill, you will get ill, because if you can't release them, they'll start to manifest within a certain point and certain things will start to happen. And there, there's a recent si or a study done, which was reported in the Guardian a couple of weeks ago, that the incidents of cancer in type two diabetics is much higher than everybody else. And that potentially is maybe as a result of sitting on a lot of this stuff. But I can't say with any certainty by any stretch on that, but I do a lot of I should say my wife is a practitioner of a thing called jitsu, which. Uses flows in the body and it talks about locks. You've got 26 locks, I think it is in the body. And then if these locks are open, everything flows and everything's good, and the energy's good. But if they're blocked, you'll start to feel a little bit ill or maybe a little bit stressed or a little bit this. And if you dumped, unblock it, after you get that initial sort of flag, you'll get another slightly stronger flag that might indicate that you're getting a bit of pain now. And then if you don't do anything with that, it'll just start getting bigger and bigger until something goes wrong. So I completely agree with that. You can't sit on this stuff. You've gotta let it out. And screaming is a great way of dancing. Absolutely. Fantastic way to do that. And it's really like whatever works it's I do a lot of climbing and it's funny you might turn up at a wall or you might turn up at a crag. You can feel like there's a lot of emotion. And if you climb with that emotion, it comes out, you'll see it, you will climb like crap. And you've gotta actually sit down and literally let it go. Just let the me I do meditation quite a bit, and my meditation might only be five or six minutes. That's it. But I'll do it a couple of times a day. And that has a big impact. And it just lets things out. It allows me to breathe.

James: 38:03

So over the years, especially since the mindset shift, how has that shaped your identity, but not just as a patient, but maybe within relationships, within your purpose, within work?

Simon: 38:19

Oh first of all, if you talk about relationships, I have to give my, my, my wife a gold medal for stick it with me for 20 odd years. Probably prior to me seeing that doctor at the age of 40 I was an angry individual. And I drank too much. And, especially with diabetes especially with sort of type ones and type twos can have it as well, where you can get low blood sugars and in theory you can collapse so effectively. Like I, for all intents and purposes, I might have collapsed from a low blood sugar, but I just look like I'm drunk. So I'd go out and she has no idea where I am when I'm coming back, will I come back? Is she gonna get a call from an ambulance? No idea. There's a lot of panic for her just sitting at home with that. And I would then be almost blase head in the sand, don't worry about it, everything's gonna be fine. And I just go out and blow steam, but I get like absolutely Maldi drunk. I'd be. Eating foods I shouldn't be eating. I just, I was ticking every box for this is an early death and I probably wasn't a great individual. And there was obviously my wife saw enough in me to stick with me. But certainly when I changed and I started to work with that doctor in the us Dr. Bernstein, that's when life started to get an awful lot better and a lot richer. And I felt far more empowered as an individual and as a diabetic and far more responsible for what I was doing and the impact it had on other people and just a much nicer and more loving individual. And as a patient prior to that it was always I go to guy's hospital and they'd get the hba one C and then they go, Simon, this is not good enough. This is not good enough. You have to change. If you don't change, you'll die next. Whereas now I go in and I say things to, I'm like no, that's wrong and I don't agree with you because I have such an in-depth knowledge of diabetes. And I can quite frequently find myself, I went for a 15 minute meeting and then I might have two or three doctors invited into the meeting to have conversations and get my view on various bits and pieces. So it's kinda it's changed a lot. And it's certainly the NHSI have to say it's a phenomenal organization. And really what it does every day that it gets up is truly incredible, and especially with the diabetics. But if I could give them unlimited resources I'd I'd love them to see every patient every three months. I'd love them to, to deal with the emotional side. To really help diabetics along. But what they do at the moment is really, truly incredible. And they deserve full credit for what they do. And yeah, so as a patient, I'm probably a much nicer guy. It's much quicker to deal with me'cause they get my hba one C and they go, wow, that's amazing. Off you go and we'll see you in 12 months. So on that front, I'm a much better guy and as an individual, just with my wife and my family and my friends, I'm just a much more relaxed guy. And really the key thing is that I'm actually at peace with my diabetes. And that's, I can't emphasize how big that is. But to say that I'm at peace is huge from where I came from. So it was almost like I was in the trenches fighting a war at a really dirty, bloody battle. And now I feel like I'm on the beach relaxed. I'm not ordering a cocktail as much as I'd like to. I'll just have a glass of water.

James: 41:42

What are the non-negotiables in your daily life that help me to say grounded, healthy, and collected to your body?

Simon: 41:50

So good. Yeah, very good question. So one of the things I do is I have a sort of ritual I do in the morning and I get up and I do a little bit of meditation and I set intentions. Now the very first thing I have to do is check a blood test. So literally I will grab, I'll grab my mobile, I have a continuous glucose monitor, and I'll immediately check what's my blood sugar which I'm doing right now, just in case. And it's perfect. So I'll do that and I do three injections now if I'm having a bit of a moment and I just, you know what I'm just enough. I let myself breathe and I'll go outside. I've got a, got a balcony here, and I'll stand out in the balcony and just breathe and just let myself relax and, look how grateful you are for everything you've got, and then you'll get on it. But I'll set intentions every day. Today's gonna be a good day, and you're gonna control your diabetes, you're gonna eat well, and you're gonna take your injections. And then with regard to anything and everything that I do, you'll always find me with a backpack or a small satchel in there. I've got my injections, all my insulin. I'll have a bottle of Lucas aids, I, and I'll have any medication that I need. And then I'll have just an emergency set up just in case anything goes wrong or anything happens or, and you'd be amazed. You would literally be amazed at some of the stuff like that. I've dropped an insulin vial into the toilet. Like literally, I wasn't on the toilet, but I was to the side of the toilet, hit a shelf. Bounced off a radiator, hit the seat, and then went into the bowl and you're like, really? What are the chances? So you always have two, and then if you've only got the one that you're down, then you always leave it at home. So there's a process. You become incredibly resourceful and very resilient, but it's always make sure I've got that satchel, make sure it's got all the ticks. So I need the ade, I need this, I need that. And set the intentions. Setting the intentions is a great way to start the day. And it just means you're in a positive mindset and away you go

James: 43:53

other,'cause obviously that's about different ways in which you can create the routines. What are the non-negotiables you've had to do for the last 15 years?

Simon: 44:06

So really it's so the diet I'm on is incredibly strict. So I stick to it. Quite frequently if you'd invite me around for dinner, just suggestion, just throwing that out there, James. But if you did invite me around for dinner, I'm more than likely gonna bring my own dinner or I'm gonna tell you this is what I'm gonna do and I'll bring a weighing scales'cause I need to weigh it out if I'm eating your stuff. So the non-negotiables are really the rules that I need to live by as a diabetic. Now there's, as I said, there's, our diabetics are quite resourceful, so we can if we have to change the rules a little bit so maybe I don't have lunch or maybe I don't have lunch at one, I have it at four, then I won't have dinner. It is flexible, but within that you've gotta stick rigidly to the rules. So if I have lunch, it's basically 2 1 3 cups of green veg, 171 grams of protein, five units of insulin. That's the number. Now, if I can't get 171 grams, I know that, for every 28.3 grams less, I take half a unit, less insulin. Alternatively, it's a bit more. So you've gotta stick with these rules and you cannot bend them. And I know that sounds like really rigid, but the thing is, you, if you start, and again, it's like, it's that little cous track, it's you start going to the gym in January and you start off, you do really well. You get up in the morning and you go to the gym and then the following kind of morning you do it, and then the third morning then, and then I'll just sleep a little bit longer and then and then suddenly it's gone. And you've gotta be very cognitive of that with the diabetes as well, because it's very easy to slip. And if you allow new synapsis in your brain to connect where you say, eh, it's okay, don't worry about that, you can get away with that. You'd be fine. You start to train your mind to say, you can get a little more relaxed and a little bit easy, a little easier with this. So it might, non-negotiables is you stick like a rock to this. Sometimes you just can't, you've gotta bend in certain ways and that's all right. But that's the outlier. What you do on a given day, you focus and you just continue with that. And to the extent, like I used to generally bring my work or bring my food into work, which I, prior to that I'd never done. I'd always just got a gone out and got a sandwich or a burger or went whatever the hell. And I brought it in rigidly. And then what I did was I found out restaurants that worked for me. So if they were a beef, if they did burgers and I knew it was a six ounce burger, which is 171 grams, perfect, I'll have that burger, no bun, no tomato, no onion, and some cold saw on the side. And they charged me the same price, which is fine, I don't mind. But that works. So it ticks the boxes so rigidly, you have to follow that. And they are non-negotiables.

James: 46:56

So for somebody who's perhaps. On this path of becoming a bit more rigid with their non-negotiables. Obviously when you are trying to do something like that, it's hard work and it requires a lot of focus and motivation. For those people who perhaps haven't quite got the motivation yet, what do you say to them?

Simon: 47:21

So regarding the motivation this is where like these are the sort of guys I want on my workshops. And really, I talk about like the, I mentioned the HB A1C, which is a blood test and my strategy is called the A1C, which is derivative of that. And it, the first key step around that is a for awaken. And that again, is where you're trying to tap into those deep motivations. And it's like really? What do you care? What's your driver? What do you love in life? Let's get into that. And it doesn't matter what it is, but certainly like when I started that process when I was in New York, and I continued for probably a week or two after that. But it was like I was coming up with stuff like, I wanna sail across the Atlantic. I wanna climb a mountain. I want to have brilliant conversations with brilliant people who, I may not because I'm dead or I wanna be able to do, I wanna walk across the uk. I want to really have a brilliant and enriching and vibrant life with my wife. I wanna spend as much time with my kids. And when you start to tap these deep motivations, you'll start to get, this is why they wanna look after this.

James: 48:28

And

Simon: 48:28

that's what they've gotta write down because they, in doing that exercise, you create the foundation. And that foundation needs to be strong because inevitably storms will come in. You're gonna get tested. And that's just life. Life happens. And if you have a strong foundation, when those problems occur, you will be able to stand strong and face them front. And I almost would, during the, in the workshops, we'd talk about, I want you to write a statement after you've written down all of these things. This is why you wanna look after it. Get me one big, clear statement, and I want you to stick it on your wardrobe. I want it on the front door. I want it on the mirror. I want it in your kitchen. And I want you to look at it and remind yourself, this is why you're doing this. And very quickly what you tend to find is it becomes just part of you. You just do this. And it's, it becomes effectively when it gets to that point. That's your non-negotiable. And then, we talk about A1C and then one I. A little bit of poetic license. I'm Irish, we have a lot of poets, so a little poetic license. So the one is for identify and then that, in that area that we're looking for, identify what's stopping you and you'll find all sorts. It's diabetics of all sorts of blocks. And one of them for me was, blood tests. I used to hate doing them'cause they were always cramp. They were always cramp. And then I get myself into this emotional turmoil, like self-loathing, self hate, lack of self-confidence, self-doubt. You're not good enough, you're not strong enough, you're not use, you don't care. Nobody else is gonna care. Why should they be bothered if you are not? And I'd just be exhausted and I said I need to tease that story. And that took me a couple of hours to literally to be able to verbalize that to you in literally a couple of seconds that took hours and hours to write that out. It probably took me a couple of days to be honest. But as I got that down, I suddenly was like, I need to change that story. And in doing that, I now say I do blood tests because they provide me with information that allows me to take control, correct a reaction control so that I can live a long and healthy life. How much more empowering is that statement compared to the other one? And these are the sort of things that we work with. And then, the final piece of that puzzle is see for choose. Choose your language, look at how you talk to yourself about your diabetes. If you're constantly saying things that are sowing seeds of negativity and self-doubt, they'll manifest. But there's studies on this. Joe Dispenza does huge conferences on literally, if you think poorly, it'll manifest in your body. So if you're going like, I just can't control my blood sugars, trust me, you won't be able to control your blood sugars. I'll never get on top of this. That'll happen too. But if you start saying sort of stuff like, I do these blood tests because it gives me information that allows me to take corrective action if required. These are positive things. So it's also looking at how you speak to yourself internally and externally, how you speak with people, and also to yourself. I'm a bit of a rambler. I think it's an Irish thing. You just talk to the wife is slowly getting used to it over 20 years. But also how people talk to you as a diabetic, because you've gotta, you're subconscious, you've gotta, you've gotta manage that like with two literally guards at the front of it. Because when people say things like, oh my God, it's so hard. I don't know how you do it. Your subconscious just hears, it's hard. If people are saying to you, oh I could never do that. You're amazing. It'll pick up. I could never do that. You've gotta be incredibly careful with what people are saying to you. And I used to get a lot of people who would say to me, when I started this regime with my doctor, and they go, are you still on that crazy diet? And I was like, I probably don't really want to be hearing that all the time. So what I started saying to people is that's the lifestyle I embrace now. And people would just stop straight away and they go, oh, okay. And what I used to find was, or still find to today is these people would come back to me about a week or two later and they'd go, tell me about that diet and how does it work and what do you do? And as a result of that, the engagement between the two of us would be much more positive and they really want to hear and listen about it. And you'd say, I. Diabetes is tough, but you know what, it's completely manageable. And I use language that empowers me rather than sows seeds of negativity and self-doubt.

James: 53:24

Yeah. That's strong. That's, it's one of them things that if you hear too much of it, it can have such a negative impact on yourself. So I feel it's key is the words that we use and the words that other people use. And I suppose sometimes as well, if you are around somebody who always is using negativity that doesn't alarm yourself, then maybe it's time to split ways.

Simon: 53:50

Move on. Don't there's, you get one life, you get one vessel. Your body, there's no negotiation on that. It's I, listen, I love your buddy, but I gotta move on. And I, I remember I did something similar to this where I was in I'd been in London and I'd had this huge crew of friends and I decided I was going to, it was gonna on my bucket list. I wanted to travel around the world, and I went on my own. And I intentionally went to my own because then other words, there was no dependency on anyone. And I took all my diabetic stuff with me and I set off and off I went. And this was prior now to me meeting that doctor in the us. And what I started to realize is I hadn't had a lot of time with just me and I started to reflect on all sorts of parts of my life and where I was going and my control was okay at the time. So it probably didn't really require me to focus as much as I certainly in a couple of years after that I needed to. And I started to look though at all of the people around me. I had this huge crew of people I'd go out drinking with and booing and go to parties and restaurants and pretty much just with the intention of getting drunk every time we met. And I looked at all of these and I looked at how they interacted with me and the language they used of the diabetes. And I decided I needed to get rid of all of these people. As you were saying, time to split ways. And I wrote an email to every one of these people. So it was about a, I dunno, it was close to 200. And I just said, I wish you all the best in life. There's no, there's no anger or anything like that, but there can't hang around with you anymore. I just need to move on. Because their influence was having a very negative effect on my life, as in it was drinking too much, some drugs in there as well. Just the language the behavior, the manner. And then the way we, they would talk to me around my diabetes and stuff. I just thought I don't need this. And I got rid of all of them, with the exception of one guy who just kept knocking on the door. And I remember I met him for a pint in the Aries, and straight away he started telling me all his problems. And then he started talking about God damn you and your diabetes, that stuff. It's, geez, I don't know how you do it. And I remember I had half a pint and then I said, listen, I gotta go. And I left him and I never saw him again. And that was the best thing I ever did. And that bit of advice, you were saying smart ways. Absolutely. As a diabetic, you've got enough on your plate. And if you've got some bringing a load of negativity, get'em outta there

James: 56:31

so that people who want to know more about yourself And do you have any contact details? And what do you actually teach people?

Simon: 56:40

What do you

James: 56:40

offer?

Simon: 56:41

You contact me. I'm building my website at the moment. I'm running a little bit behind schedule. I put my hands up, so I'm building my website at the moment, but you can contact me on Simon diabetes take control.com, and I can share that link with you as well. If you wanna, you can put it up on the screen. Yeah. And then I can also give a QR code if anyone wants to contact me on LinkedIn and just tell me you're reaching out, you're interested in diabetes, and you'd like to know more about the workshop. Absolutely. And then the workshop itself, we deal with an awful lot of stuff in there. The workshop itself will be two mornings and there are five broad brush strokes, a for awaken. I, one for identify what's stopping you c for choose your language. And we do an awful lot in these sections. So we probably cover the first two. We probably be covered in the first morning, and then the second morning would be the final three. And then the fourth one is measure and control. Which is a huge part that diabetics really don't do. And this is that h this glucco graft that I use to control my diabetes because one of the key things you gotta do is, they've got all these funky sort of data sets that you can record your blood sugars and stuff like that. But nobody looks at them and they don't really provide you with the information. And, it's like running a business. There are very important measurements that you gotta take in running a business. And if you're not doing that, it is more likely you're gonna collapse. It's the same with the diabetes. You've got to record this stuff. So I do a whole section of measure and record, and then I'll just talk about the earth moon and the stars. It's get up there, get out, get active, get moving. And I've done a lot of stuff. I've been, sledding with dogs in the Arctic for three weeks. I've been out in the Himalayas doing Mount Everest. I haven't climbed Mount Everest, should I say sorry, doing Everest Base camp. I'm doing some climbing. I've sailed across the Nor Pacific, and you can do anything as a diabetic. Your life is as rich as everybody else's, and if you come at it with the right mindset, the world's your oyster. Go grab it.

James: 58:44

Yeah. Thank you very much, Simon.

Simon: 58:47

Yeah, my pleasure.