You Matter, I Matter

How to Stop Feeling Stuck and Start Moving Forward Again

James Ainsworth Episode 96

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Feeling unmotivated, stuck, or lacking discipline? In this episode, we explore why these phases happen and how to move through them with clarity and intention. 

You’ll learn why it’s okay to feel off track, how overwhelm and daily habits can “clog” your energy, and a simple way to reset. Discover how focusing on one small change—like improving your diet, mindset, or environment—can help you regain momentum. 

We also dive into the power of self-talk, self-love, and having more fun to reconnect with yourself. If you’re ready to stop feeling stuck and start moving forward, this episode will guide you back into flow.

​Have you ever hit a point where you just don't feel like doing anything? No motivation, no discipline. Just stuck. In this episode, I open up about a phase I'm going through right now and why it's actually okay to feel this way sometimes. But more importantly, I share how to move through it by identifying what's blocking you, focusing on one small change and slowly getting back into flow. If you've been feeling off track or overwhelmed, this is for you. Welcome to You Matter. I matter, a transformational podcast about reconnecting with what truly matters. I'm your host James, and each week is an opportunity to explore a little bit deeper who you really are with amazing guests. We explore topics such as purpose, connection, commitment, and what it really means to live more consciously. If you've been feeling disconnected from yourself, from others, or from life, you are in the right place. Join us on new matter. I matter. Now. Let's begin. Have you ever been a point in your life where you didn't wanna do stuff? You just felt you didn't have the motivation, you lacked the discipline, or something just didn't feel right when it came to taking action or stepping forward with? Whatever, whatever you're meant to be doing, the life without your dreams, aspirations, whatever it is. That's how I feel right now. That is how I feel right now. I just, I right this moment in time, I feel like. I just, I get up late. I watch, look at social media. I do, I find it hard to motivate myself. I struggle with disciplines gone completely out the window. And do you know what? Sometimes that's okay. That is okay. It's okay to be unmotivated. It's okay to sometimes lack discipline. It's okay sometimes to not feel like you wanna do stuff. And even if it's for a day or a week or two weeks, or a month or a year, it's okay because we live in this society or this world where it's so fast paced, we have, everything's just, our mind is overloaded with everything under the sun from social media, from just everyday contractions in the house. Every day. People, you get caught up in all our emotions and that kind of stuff, and it's just everything just compounds and it just feels so overwhelming and stuff. And it's okay to have time off. It's okay not to know your direction. It's okay to feel undisciplined. And this is what I really wanna talk about today. I obviously want to just, obviously this is a point in my life and I feel like I'm eating, I'm not eating particularly good. I'm not really exercising like I have done in the past. I feel like slouching on the sofa all day and it's just, I just feel like this is what I need to talk about today and how this kind of things, it's okay to do something like that now and again. I'm not saying this is something you've gotta do your entire life, because I feel like doing it on the odd occasion is okay. Or if you have three or four productive days and then you have two or three days like that, then it's okay. It's okay. But there comes a time when you have to allow yourself to get back into the driving seat. You have to allow yourself to discipline yourself with whatever it is, whether it's eating, whether it's fitness, whether it's work, business, relationships, whatever it is. I feel like there's times when you have to discipline yourself. I feel like there's times when, if we haven't got ourselves into a habitual pattern of discipline and perhaps a morning routine or a routine motivation. Can come and go, it can be fleeting. And so relying on motivation is not something you want to really rely on as a whole. One thing I have noticed is how just sometimes you go through periods of lack. You go through periods of struggle, you go through periods of challenges. And a lot of these times when you've got a lot of challenges, lack or things like that, it can be tiring. It can be more tiring than doing stuff because your mind's playing with you all the time saying you're not good enough and you're not worthy. I'm part of this group to do with a lady called Taylor Eaton, and she talks about the concept of being the steward of your life or the steward of your abundance, steward of your money. And it's the idea of having it as a steward of your life. And what I mean by that is that we have many energy coming in, energy going out. So how you utilize this is where you become the steward. You are the guide, you are the person who dictates how your energy is used. And I've I probably haven't come up with it, but I have this idea in my head that you have energy coming in, you have then your gut go, goes through a sieve, and then you have energy coming out now. If you are at a point where everything's just on the top of you, I feel like the SIV gets very clogged up and the more clogged up the sib is, the less likely energy is to flow through you. So I feel like the idea of having the energy come through and go out is almost, it's a natural thing and it almost becomes if you are in the flow. It naturally comes through you. There's not much you have to do. But if your sieve becomes clogged, then it's the idea of perhaps I need to look a little bit deeper into what why is my sieve clogged? And this could be anything from. What I'm eating or not training properly or struggling with motivation. Discipline could be one. It could be the words that I use. It could be the fact that I'm around negative people. It could be anything that brings us down. Anything that brings us down. So if you're in a quite a negative environment. Then that's going to create, clog your sve up so that the energy is gonna flow through you a lot less. So what I've come up with or not come up with, the idea that flow through me is that, okay, now what do I need to deal with the sieve? Okay, my SIV might be slightly clogged. What is it? What is one thing that I can work on this week or this next month, which can help to start to unclog my sieve. So for me, I feel right at this moment in time, the thing that I need to work on the most right now to do with the the unclogging, the sieve, is to work on what I'm eating. I feel like the food that I'm eating is probably having the biggest impact. On how the s civ is how blocked the S civ is. And so for me that would be asking myself first thing in the morning or just allowing myself a little space to have a little deep breathing. Then allow myself to ask the question, what is it that my body wants right now? And what I'm actually right now in this exact moment I'm feeling I'm hearing or sensing I want eggs. I want veg, I want something nutritious, something that's going to fill me up. But at the same time, it's going to bring in nutrients and fit, vitamins and nutrients, vitamins and minerals. That's really say, and yeah, that's the question. Is that okay? I realized that I'm a little bit blocked a moment now. Where can I, what do I need to work on the most in order to progress forward and. As I said, it could be food, it could be working on fitness. It could be the words that I say to myself. It could actually be just tuning in. What do what kind of stuff's going in my head right now? I might be a little bit anxious, a little bit nervous. How do I now take that and really take it a step forward? Or it could be the fact that I am. In an A conflict with somebody and I feel down, or maybe we are, you are around family members who are quite negative. It could be any, anything like that. Anything. And it's surprising how small things can have such a big impact. The other last week, I think it was on a Monday, and I don't know if I've mentioned this, but I, my two, one of my front teeth fell out and. I was actually eating. I'm gonna be come tell you the truth here. I was actually eating Percy pigs and I just remember eating it and I this crunch. And then one of my front I think front there was a couple of teeth fell out. And I was so annoyed of myself. I was frustrated. I was really upset because it, this tooth isn't really the really obvious teeth and. I felt as though a part was missing. So something like that can have a big impact on how our energy flows through us now. We always say that these kind of situations, we can't control the outcome. It's happened. We have to let it, we have to let it go, but letting it go is harder said than done. And so it's this continual practice of. Really tuning in and practicing, letting go and letting go of control. I can't control what's happened. It's such the same as maybe you've been in an accident, you can't control that you've been in the accident, but you can control. It's how you respond in that exact moment when where you currently are. And yeah, it's. Where do I feel outta flow? And then what action steps can I take in order to start to put yourself back into that flow? And then it begins the level of trusting trust and trusting yourself to know that you can input those different things. But one thing I highly recommend is not going at it, so not going full in. So what I mean by that is that if you're going to start to do something, start small. So if you're gonna start to change your diet, like I'm going to, I'm perhaps going to work on one meal, work on one meal for a month, and then the following month I might add a bit more in. But if you try to change everything all at once, you will find that you will. For a lot of people, a lot of people will struggle. I would struggle, I personally would struggle massively because I find trying to change it all the ti all, all at once, too overwhelming. Another thing is to watch out for, is to watch out for the thoughts that we say around what we're saying about to ourself about the situation. So for my teeth, I noticed that I felt something missing. So then suddenly I was saying to myself, I feel missing. I feel there's part of me missing. I feel like there's part of me, and suddenly that part of me starts to tune into I'm not worthy. I'm not good enough. So it's watching the words that we say to ourself and maybe a good practice, which I've now, and again, I do incorporate is some mirror work. So you might go and stand next to a mirror and you might say to yourself, I love you. I love you. I love you. And allow that to come from your heart. And if it's make it even better, you just to get right close to the mirror and you go look yourself in the eyes, and you say, I love you. I love you. Because what's that bringing in is actually, it's a lot of self-love. There's a lot of self appreciation. Another thing is to do things you enjoy. Have fun. Have fun, is so important. I myself now and again, struggle with this because, so I recently went for a walk. Okay let's start that with bit a bit again. So now and again, I see walking as a treat and quite often I know when I go on walks, I tune into nature and I can tune to my myself. I tune into Soul essence and while I come to realize is through that, one of the walks is that. My family, myself, my dad, my my dad's dad, and so on and so on have always been farmers, but probably about a hundred 150 years ago. Farming, was that it? It still probably is for a lot of people. Farming is, it's a it's a, it is full on farming. And if you didn't make. Make any money, or if you didn't sell your products, then there's a possibility of you starving and dying. And so I had this belief in really deep below, inside myself, this deep belief that said to me that walking was a treat. Now, if I'm not working, then I don't deserve a treat. So I noticed when I was working, I would struggle, I would naturally struggle to walk. Or to go and actually tune in with nature, because I would have this belief that I'm not worthy of this because I haven't done any work. So it's understanding where this has come from and then deciding, okay, this no longer is to say is represents who I am, or it never did represent who I am. And so understanding that this belief is there, but, and then choosing something else, and this goes on to. How important having fun is. Having fun is so important because what I notice is that when I'm having fun, I forget about everything. I'm present. I forget about what's going on. I forget about the past. I forget about the future. I am tuned into that present moment and I am having fun and I feel happy and I feel as though anything can happen. And so I feel. One of the things I've come to realize in myself is that the more that I have fun, the more I am tuned in with the present, the more that I am tuned in with what's going on around me and nothing else it brings me peace, it brings me calmness, it brings me a sense of expansion. And this is truly ex, amazing to, to witness. And so I've noticed. I've noticed that recently with having this coach, and when I'm with this coach, he asks the right questions. I'm able to tune in deeply with myself, and I find this so much fun and so much fun and joy tuning into myself because I feel, even though I am whole, I feel whole in its incredible feeling. And because I'm tuned in, I'm actually tuned in with. A lot of very, some, yeah, a lot of wisdom, a lot of deep understanding of myself, a lot of deep understanding of the the earth of everything, and it's truly exceptional and fun. And yeah, so I think there's quite a few things there that I've talked about. Let's just look at the core takeaways from today's episode. The first thing is, it's okay to be unmotivated, undisciplined. It's okay to pause and to have a break at times. It's also the realization that. Using the idea of the sieve and how it clogs up is basically a representation of the, what we take on every day. So things like, um, the food we eat, exercise, the energy we have around other people, negativity and all these kind of different things and how this all clogs us up. And so being able to identify what clogs us up is key to letting it go or working through or putting the plans into place to overcome this and looking at that. It's also an idea to take one thing at a time. So say for example, you are eating particularly healthy, then that is something that you can work over, work on over the next month. And then bringing in a bit of self-love and fun to make it more enjoyable. And that is really what I wanna talk about in today's episode. Thank you for listening. If something in today's conversation resonated, take a moment to sit with it. And if you feel called, share this episode with someone who might need it to you matter. I matter is a growing space, and if you would like to stay connected. You're welcome to follow or subscribe wherever you are listening. It really helps us work to reach people. It's meant for. These conversations matter. You matter. I matter. Until next time, take care of yourself and the relationships in your life.