Time & Energy
Driven by a deep fascination with how top performers prioritize their time and manage their Emotional Energy, Time & Energy is my endeavor to learn, grow, and share ways in which we all can be at our best when our best is required.
Time & Energy
Ep: 9 - Small Town Grit, Big Life Lessons w/ Brady Opheim
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My conversation with Brady Opheim goes back a long way — about 20 years, give or take a few questionable decisions.
From the outside, Brady’s life looks pretty dialed in: small-town roots, a successful business, a family, and a lot of hard-earned experience. But as we talked, it became clear that even a “good” life can drift if comfort starts to replace intention.
In this episode, Brady shares what shifted for him after a serious injury and a few close calls forced him to slow down and take an honest look at how he was living. Not because things were broken — but because he realized they could be better.
We talk about alcohol not as a villain, but as a distraction. About leadership as ownership before authority. About the difference between being busy and actually moving with purpose. And about how easy it is to argue for your limitations when you’ve been telling yourself the same story for years.
Brady also opens up about a demanding leadership experience that pushed him well outside his comfort zone and reshaped how he shows up — at work, at home, and with the people who matter most.
This isn’t a dramatic reinvention story. It’s more like two guys who’ve known each other a long time having an honest conversation about what it looks like to grow up — again.
If you’ve ever felt successful but slightly off-course, this one’s worth a listen.
Keep Grinding,
NJL
Book: "Unreasonable Possibilities" - by Mike Jones
I'd love to here from you! Please click and share your thoughts and feedback.
Test test. Brady Opime, how are you? I'm good, man. How are you doing? I'm doing well. I'm doing well. I'm I'm happy that you're here. It it's been a minute since we chatted. Actually, uh, you know, life happens, right? I mean, I've been I've been crazy busy with work and and all those types of things, and and you've been on a bit of a journey, which we're gonna get to here in a second, which I I I sincerely can't wait to hear about. But just first and foremost, how are the holidays? What'd you guys what'd you guys get up to?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Had uh pretty low-key holidays. My wife uh family came over to my house on Christmas Day. We spent Christmas Eve over at my folks' house. My brother and his wife were out of town, so it was just my other brother and his son, and my wife and kids, and my my uh daughter-in-law. So yeah, we it was just low-key, easy, easy peasy fun. Lasagna dinner, nothing special.
SPEAKER_00Nice. Oh, that sounds really good, actually. Awesome. To get us started before we kind of get into to some of the things that you're you're certainly passionate about these days, which is awesome. Here's what I here's what I know about you at yeah, at a very 30,000 foot view, right? Number one, I know you grew up in Enderlin. Yeah. Tell me about tell me about that experience.
SPEAKER_03Well, some people, a few of my friends will say that I'm top 200 athlete in class B, uh Class B sports, but I think I might have just made that up. Uh not possible. Well, interesting though. Growing up in a small town, thousand people, you you play all sports. I mean, there is uh kind of no walls. There's no rules. Sure. You you get up in the morning when you're five and you take your bike to your buddy's house and nobody knows where you are. You you live by the the the whistles, yeah, if you know what that means. So there's a noon whistle and a six whistle and a ten whistle. From the time you're five, you're that's your check-in moment. So I had a pretty wildly free lifestyle growing up. My mom and dad raised three boys. If anybody knows the Opine Boys, that's a handful. So by the time I was pretty much going into high school, you know, my folks owned a bar in town. And so I don't know if I knew that. Yeah. Okay. They uh my my father worked on the Sioux Line Railroad for 30 some years, and my mom did many different jobs. She worked at a bank for a while, and then when they bought they got they bought the bar, they they she kind of took over the bar. So I hopped out in the bar when I was a kid, you know, stocking coolers, stealing beer and things like that. So what a luxury. Who would know a case is gone? Do you think your parents ever knew? I don't know. I don't think they kept tabs. I mean, it wasn't like a good inventory schedule. Yeah, that's what that's kind of what I was getting at. Was it just kind of like yeah, it was it was crazy. Yeah, the growing up in a small town was fantastic. I I wouldn't change it at all. I mean, I I think there's benefits to growing up in a large town like this if you're trying to you know get into a college or things like that, but I wouldn't change it. It was fantastic.
SPEAKER_00Good, man. Good. So now you have two older brothers. They're both older, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you're the youngest, Trevor and Mike. Is Trevor the oldest, right? And then Mike and then Brady.
SPEAKER_03All four years apart.
SPEAKER_00Oh, okay. Okay, got it. Trevor's eight years older than you are.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Wow, okay. Yeah, got it. He shockingly looks pretty good for his age. Of course, your old man looks like he's still like it's been a minute since I've seen him, but last time I saw him, he looked like he still looks like he's about 50, 60. 79 now. Unreal. Yeah. Unreal. Very cool.
SPEAKER_03So 60th wedding anniversary in January for my folks. Wow.
SPEAKER_00That's a long time.
SPEAKER_03That is a long, long time.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. What do you think the secret is? Sleep in separate bedrooms.
SPEAKER_03I don't know. Yeah, I'm I'm an idiot. This this year certainly every once in a while. This this year is my 30th. So good for you guys. Yeah, it's uh it's impressive.
SPEAKER_00Good for you guys. That's awesome. Well, well, I'm sure we'll we'll talk a little bit about Deb too. In fact, no time like the present. When did you meet your wife Deb?
SPEAKER_031990.
SPEAKER_00Okay.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Started dating in maybe like 90, and then 90, well, I suppose 96 we got married.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Yeah. So she's an Enderlin girl.
SPEAKER_03You're older? She she's older. Yeah. She's a year a year older.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Okay. Okay. So married in 96.
SPEAKER_03Married in 96, first boy in 99, and Olivia came around in 03.
SPEAKER_00Wild man. So so going back, you know, growing up in the small town, like you mentioned, one of the things I think that would be really cool about that is just the opportunity to play every sport and to do everything, right? You know, you get a lot of uh parents that'll talk about today. It's like, all right, well, they're kids go to Davies, but they or Moorhead, you know, and they and they a couple big schools, right? Is just the the example I'm trying to provide. But you know, they get to eighth grade and they can't make the the team, so they quit, right? Or they get to junior year and they just it's like they they can't they can't compete anymore, they kind of lose whatever and and there's really nothing else for them to do because they're just there's so many kids competing for spots. I'd imagine small town like Enderlin, you're able to do pretty much everything. You almost have to do everything, probably.
SPEAKER_03I I would say the the saddest thing I would see, say up in Fargo or Moorhead or whatever is is being pigeonholed out of a sport that you like doing. Sure. Because the society now tells you that you need to do this 365.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03You this is what you need to do if you want to go anywhere, you need to focus on basketball. That's all you can do. That do that. And you'll even have coaches say, What are you doing playing baseball in the summer? Work on basketball. Right. Go to go to what is it called? Uh, you know, double A or AAA something, because you, you know, this is what you got to do. And so you just kind of give it up because by eighth grade, you know, if you if you're talented, you you kind of go, Well, that's my that's my route.
SPEAKER_00Right. You know, so which is a bummer because everyone peaks at different ages, right? I mean, how how many kids, at least in in my school, I mean, there are a lot of kids that were tiny, you know what I mean, just had no athletic ability until they were 15 or 16, and then all of a sudden it's like, oh, got it. Okay. Yeah. You grew a foot over the summer.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, it's it's crazy. And then yeah, you but now you're playing you're playing baseball and you're 6'5, and it's like, well, maybe you should pick up a basketball again.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. No, absolutely. I uh I think it's funny. I mean, of of the other folks we've had on the podcast, you know, Josh Persons, Andy Doden, Dave Schultz, I mean, all of them played other sports, right? And and they speak very fondly about the fact that they were not one-dimensional individuals. And, you know, I think Andy towards the end of the end of high school really focused on golf, but you know, Josh playing basketball through through high school, you know, Dave hockey and football. And so, yeah, all of them had said, I mean, that's that's part of what made them so successful in the vein of top performance, which is kind of the time and energy podcast that that I'm trying to learn about is you know, what differentiates and what separates top performers from others, and also you know, interest in in the journeys that that that people are on. And so coming from a small town like that, you know, I'm sure you get a lot of exposure to a lot of different things, but maybe a little sheltered too in a certain way, you know. Talk about that a little bit if if that's a thing.
SPEAKER_03Well, I would just say when you say sheltered, I would say that you know, you're not gonna get a lot of looks. You're playing you know, small town bait baseball, which we thought was big time baseball, you know. But you know, like the Fargo bombers, we played them quite a bit in Valley Valley City, we played them in Legion ball. But and you could get you know, you get some people looking at a big time pitcher like Justin Fletchhawk. I pitched against him. You know, he went to play you know some Pro Ball and stuff, and still kind of a feather in my cap. I beat him, so that was good. Yeah. Justin, if you're out there, you're a way better pitcher than I was. Um anyway, but yeah, you just don't get the looks. Actually, I I excelled at golf in high school. I was a plus three handicap my from the time I was like 15 on. What happened? We didn't have golf. What happened? I'm sorry, yeah, shot across the bow there. But uh, we didn't have golf, and I started a golf program my senior year. My mom and dad went to the school. There was no rules against it, they just wouldn't pay for anything. So I started going to golf tournaments and my senior year. I created the golf team. I went to the first tournament myself. I won, and then I went and grabbed three other baseball players that could golf and I said, Let's go play. Took them out of baseball practice. By the second end of the second tournament, when we won both tournaments, by the end of the second one, our baseball coach goes, This is done. Yeah, we're not doing this anymore. So I was like, okay. So I ended up our our and you know, long story short, but our baseball team was number one in the state in in high school baseball, and I was number one in the state in Class B golf, and they happened on the same weekend. Oh no. So I played baseball. Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00I don't know if I knew that story. In fact, I know I didn't know that story.
SPEAKER_03That's well, you didn't know I was top 200 in Class B sports all time.
SPEAKER_00Well, that's impossible for me to not know that because you mention it every single time we're together. Uh all kidding aside, w when when you come from an environment like that, right? I mean, you you you grow up pretty quick too. I know, you know, one of the and we don't have to go into all the details, but you know, just your life experiences to me are something that have always been fascinating. You know, you mentioned a time when you had graduated high school and ended up in a fishing boat somewhere.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I mean, even re I'll get into the fishing thing because I did go up there. I I came up to Fargo and went to college for a semester, and an offer came to go to Alaska going commercial fishing, just like you see in on Deadliest Catch. Basically, we didn't crab though, we did longlining, which is cod fishing. Oh, right. And basically every long tawn silver is hardy's everything is a cod. So yeah, I was on a 132-foot boat catching a million pounds of fish and offloading them 29 days on the ocean, offload for three days and go right back out for 29 more days. So that was interesting. It was cool. It it really grew me up because you kind of it is extremely taxing on your mind and body. So yeah, I my brother, my my brother was with me, Mike, and he nearly died on the boat. What I watched I watched him almost die, and and I had a guy save my life on the boat. That the guy that saved my life hated me. Yeah, it was we had a fight about two weeks earlier, a fist fight, and and he didn't do so good. And as I was sliding off the edge of the boat, he grabbed me by the hood.
SPEAKER_00Wow.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Well, I I suppose you have to form somewhat of a a brotherhood there in that type of an environment, because I I can't imagine that you're gonna have the boat captain's gonna turn around and and and grab you and you go back to shore right away because someone fell over.
SPEAKER_03If you fall over, you're dead. Yeah, there's there's no turning around, you're just gone. There's you have 30 seconds to live.
SPEAKER_00What sort of like liability paperwork do you have to sign before you go on that? Do you recall?
SPEAKER_03There's probably a some, I mean that's 20. Yeah, there's just a lot of people. We weren't thinking too much about it.
SPEAKER_00Just like whatever, sign whatever and go. Just give me my check. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I want to make tons of money. That's what I wanted.
SPEAKER_00What made you want to do that? Just the money.
SPEAKER_03It just wasn't going anywhere. You know, I was going to school, I didn't know what I wanted to do. I was helping a cousin of mine roof apartment buildings while I was going to college, and you know, half the apartments in this town I put shingles on. Yeah. So I was doing that, and you know, eight bucks an hour or something stupid like that. And I this offer came because a friend of ours did it about five years earlier. And that captain called him and said, Do you got any because they love North Dakota workers? Right. So you just you wake up in the morning, you work hard. Yep. So he called Greg the Torbenson, who lives out in Arizona now, and said, asked Mike, he says, You guys want to go to Alaska? The captain called me and wants to know if anybody wants to go. I'm not going. And Mike recruited, you know, me and two other guys, and we all went to Seattle, Washington, got on a boat, took that for 12 days up to Dutch Harbor, and then fished for four months.
SPEAKER_00For four months. Yeah. How many times did you come back into shore in that four months? Three. How seasick were you?
SPEAKER_03Never got it. Really? No. No. I've I've I'll tell you back in those days, I filled my body with a lot of stuff that makes you feel good all the time.
SPEAKER_00Well, I would imagine there's an appetite for that. Because my lord, what an experience. If you had to sum up that experience, what you know, what did you learn both maybe in the moments as well as in hindsight? If you think back on that, what are your biggest takeaways?
SPEAKER_03I learned that hard work, what we think is hard work, is not hard work at all. And I learned I don't want to do that anymore.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. That's probably good.
SPEAKER_03Not that I don't want to work hard, I don't want to do it for 20 because our my hours were 23 on, four off for 29 days. Okay, so the the max you're gonna get is four hours of sleep. About three.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Every day for 28 to 29 days. It was it was unbelievable. Then by the time you're two weeks in, you're just so used to it, it doesn't it doesn't really affect you anymore.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. Very cool, man. Very cool. So you come home. When did you start getting into uh uh plumbing and and things of that nature? It's a pretty good story.
SPEAKER_03I so I when I got back, I got with Deb. Yeah, and I'm basically just moved into their apartment. There's three women living there and me. Nice. And yeah, and I have I'm sure they love that. You know, I was 21 years old. I had about 70 or 80,000 that I came home with that was home when I got home. It was you can't spend it out there, there's nothing to spend it on. So they they just ship it to you home. Yeah. And you know, I'm 21 and I got more money than anybody, so it's great. And yeah, I just moved into that apartment. I didn't have rent. I mean, you know, and I ate out every day or whatever. Yeah. And one morning the phone rings, and it's a guy by the name of Mike Jordad who works at Manning Mechanical, and he goes, Hey, your dad, your dad says you're not doing shit. And what you know, yeah, can you come help me? And I said, Sure, what do you need? Just be over here on Monday. This address at 6 30 a.m. I said, Okay. So I got there. Basically, got this guy comes up to me, he goes, You must be the guy. I said, Yeah, I'm the guy. And he goes, Okay, well, here's three drills. All the holes are marked with the size of the hole that we need drilled. Start drilling. And I I looked out the window, and there's six buildings of apartments, and I went, this is gonna be a long day. So I just started drilling and I got done after 10 hours, and I he said, We're done, roll up the cords and put them away, put the stuff away. Okay, so I went home back to that apartment at seven o'clock the next morning. My phone rings again, and I get up and then I he goes, Mike George. We used to we used to call him George. George calls us and he calls me and he goes, What are you doing? And I go, sleeping. He goes, Where are you at? I go, sleeping. And he goes, Why aren't you at work? You no one told me to come back. I thought you needed help for a day. No, come back. Okay. So I went back. I ended up long story short, I go there for two weeks and I drill out all these buildings for this guy. Yeah. And the next Monday, my phone rings and he goes, What are you doing? And I go, What do you do? What do you need now? And he goes, he goes, Why aren't you at work? And I go, here's the deal, dude. I'm happy to help you out, but you're gonna have to start paying me. And he goes, I've been paying you. You're working for me. And I went, Oh, I just thought I was helping a friend of my dad's. So a small communication gap early. Yeah, I never went to the office. You know, like I signed a document. You just showed up at the job site. I never said I was working there. I just went to the job site, and I never went to the office and went, like, I'll work here. So that's fantastic. Kind of a neat story.
SPEAKER_00So that's fantastic. So that what year was that? 1996. 96. Okay. Okay. So right then. And then that's that's when you and Deb got together or got married.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We got married shortly after that. Not a you know, I spent every dime I had within six months from Alaska getting married, ring, put a down payment on a small little house in Greenfields out in South Fargo. I think the house cost ninety-four thousand dollars to be exact. And I remember we took a picture, the the driveway was poured for the house, and there was a bundle of wood this the size of your table here, and that was the whole house. Oh, and how they how Idco used to build these homes is a guy would bid to use that wood, and any wood that they that he needed or he screwed up on, he had to go buy himself. Oh my gosh. I mean, they're they're affordable, but you get what you pay for.
SPEAKER_00So that's that's interesting. So that that started a pretty long career in Manning.
SPEAKER_0320 years. Yeah. Yeah. 20 years to almost to the day I work there. Yeah. Two different owners. I had 14 years with I know. I had 12 years with one owner and eight years with the other owner. And then yeah, in 2015, that's when I started mission mechanics with some of my partners. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Somewhere in there became a master plumber.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. I probably can't became a master plumber right after the that 12th year when the company sold to the new owner. Not that I didn't like him or enjoy him. He was a he was a great dude.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Around that time is when I started thinking about, you know, I can't do anything without my masters. So I I've got to get that. And then just kind of got that and just stayed working. And you know, I was a manager and and and did very well for the company. I just and I did well personally too. But I mean, we kind of got to know each other really well in my manning days. And you were there right through the transition into mission. Yeah. Kind of like the my last half of manning and my first half of mission. So when you lived close to me. And uh but yeah, that's when I started thinking about you know taking that step and waiting for a uh the right opportunity. And yeah, just kind of bugged enough people enough times to say, yeah, let's do it. So yeah.
SPEAKER_00So 2015 is when you guys, you know, really got mission uh off the ground, got your got your money, got everything rocking and rolling, right?
SPEAKER_03Or was it more like I would just say that right around February of 2015, we we knew we were gonna pull the trigger and do it. We had some offers on the table to do it with some some buy in guys, you know, and then because we didn't really want to go and start, you know, Brady's and Tom's plumbing and heating out of the garage, you know. We we kind of wanted to do what we were doing on that level, commercialized plumbing and heating, but it's expensive. I mean to go all in. So we we looked for a kind of a money guy and we found one and well found two. And the first one kind of fell through right at the right at the last second. It fell through because he wrote a contract that was just absolutely one-sided. Okay. And the other guy really didn't write a contract. He just said I'm you know I'm gonna I I need this percent of the company and it was fair and for the money to get us going on the right track it it worked. Yeah. I I I'll tell you like I when when we bought him out I I kind of had a lot of animosity towards him. But some of the the things that I've read and learned over that since that time have really kind of changed my perspective of you know what he actually did for us. Yeah it it it it it allowed us to do what we're doing. So yeah um it I didn't look at it like that. I was pretty selfish in that way looking at you know the way he left and he wanted an extremely large sum of money and I was he didn't he didn't give to the company but he got the company rolling.
SPEAKER_00Yeah right it's just I looked at it through different lenses yeah so well when you're when you're in it in the moment right you're you're you're probably looking at it as just like hey what what's tomorrow look like right and you're you're utilizing information that's you know when when you're I like to think of it when you're really in it right it's it's kind of like driving in a snowstorm where you're you forget the mile markers and forget the exit signs, forget all that kind of stuff, right? You're just trying to look out your window to try to find the yellow line in the middle of the road to make sure that you're still on on the road that you're supposed to be on right and you're not you're not zoomed out to think like oh there's you know such and such place or whatever. So I can understand that but but retro retrospectively you know it sounds like you had maybe a bit of a change of heart.
SPEAKER_03Yeah I just just reframed it into what I think is probably a more realistic frame of how it worked. And he probably got what he deserved you know for a cash buyout. I mean it it worked out well for everyone and and yeah to look at it through those that different you know reframing that to why we get to have what we have today is only because of that.
SPEAKER_00That's a cool perspective man. That's good. It's and and from the way what I'm what I hear when you say that right is an opportunity for your emotional energy to not be utilizing up that RAM you know like think of a computer right there's there's constantly things working in our brains that we either consciously or subconsciously don't even know are in there. Right that that's just taking up energy it's taking up the you know good energy right healthy energy stuff and and we if we find ourselves stewing over stuff that it's just like why am I concerning myself with this right why why is this why am I allowing this to have a a control over me? So I and I might be overstating it a little bit here but it just it it that example came to mind for me where there's just a lot of things I know for me personally that you kind of look at it's like what what exactly am I doing here? Why like why am I so wrapped up in this thing?
SPEAKER_03You know it's just I can't control it. It's crazy people and I went I recently we'll get into this but I I went through some some amazing personal growth but people people use compelling stories that they've created in their mind or or they live them and that is the frame they live their life through right or wrong and it's it is it is damaging to their growth massively because they they absolutely use limitations that they've been told since they were a kid as as their structure and they absolutely you know I I I I don't like tomatoes. It's something that simple but it's because your mom didn't like tomatoes. Right and you didn't even try them and you won't try them. They are disgusting to you before you even have a chance you know and it's like why do you eat gif peanut butter? Well that's what mom bought yeah yeah why is why is gif the best because that's what was in my house just what I know. But I mean you take that into the business world and you find limitations you know so many ways you can you can find an excuse if you if you if you ask your mind for one it'll give you one you want an alibi for something somebody else's fault your mind will give it to you.
SPEAKER_00Well our brains are built that way I mean that's science there's science behind it I'm right our brains are lazy right I mean it's it starts with your what starts with your fight or flight sympathetic nervous system right I mean our brains are built to avoid danger. Yeah and and generally right if you think back to well I mean go far as far back as you want the way our brains are built is to not only just avoid danger but not have to do work yeah you know in whatever whatever work means in the context right it could be plumbing it could be leading a sales team it could be you know building a fire or chopping wood so your family can stay warm right like if given the opportunity our brains will suggest that yeah let's just let's just stay here. Let's just not let's not take any chances. You won't risk anything exactly exactly it's and so again zooming out from that thought you know you you talk about peanut butter you talk about tomatoes you talk about whatever that might be the environment in which we we grow up in is the most influential thing in our lives whether we know it or not and so when people approach me or I have the opportunity to visit with people that you know come come from environments where there's a a strong victim mentality right or everything is always somebody else's fault or if you know oh you know kid would have played more if you know the coach wasn't so stupid. You know it's just like what a what a toxic environment yeah right you don't have a chance.
SPEAKER_03You're not gaining anything by looking at blaming somebody else for your personal responsibility.
SPEAKER_00But I still do it sometimes and I still get caught in that trap and I think everybody does. But the first step is everyone knows right it's just the awareness of it. Yeah you know and catching ourselves in that moment. So anyway, when you had mentioned that you were going down to San Antonio to go through this course and meet some new people and and learn a few new things I've I've just been fascinated. So you know hence our conversation here tonight to get read in on that but first of all what what was it that precipitated your desire to to even check this out well we got to rewind a little bit okay so back to the compelling story that people tell themselves.
SPEAKER_03And you know I write a compelling story every day to now I do to kind of set my my my path for the day before I walk out the door I I set you know small little goals small little things that I want to see accomplished how I want to be for that day I really I really focus on a positive mindset period and I only focus on outcome. So before I speak whatever's going to come out of my mouth I I want to think about the outcome of that statement from other people back to me or how I you know what the reaction it's going to get. That's really healthy. But to rewind you know back to those bar days back in Enderlin North Dakota there there's a compelling story being built back then on alcohol, drinking partying fun you know taking it to I I watched I mean I could I could go on for hours on the stories and I watched you know and I'm and they're fun they're fun stories. I mean I I have some of my funnest moments in my life and you know I'm deep in the night you know so but after that you know you get you get in you're starting to build your own life you're getting to be a young adult and you know drinking is pretty important to that to those times. I mean when you're gonna go out it's to go out and have some some pops you know so just kind of fast forwarding through all that but you know at a couple moments in my life that I thought back on after my my main driving moment in July of this of 2025 that made me start thinking a little more spiritually and you know trying to be a better human being. I probably have had a dozen near death really close to death experiences in my life most of them are just a handful but a lot of them are revolving around alcohol and then this last one you know I I I was hurt pretty bad. I I I tore a ACL and MCL and hit my head really hard and during that time period I I had a couple of visions I don't know if they're dreams or whatever but I had a massive concussion and one of them that got me really bad was I was in a wheelchair and my wife was literally having to take care of me feed me and wipe my ass and I and and I would you know obviously would rather have been dead than that happening. I I shouldn't say obviously maybe other people wouldn't think that way but that one hit me pretty hard and that one's what what really opened my eyes to say hey you're gonna you got two kids they look up to you you're you got a you know 80 people working for you you you gotta you gotta take a hard look at some stuff. I went to church I I joined a church that has been really really good I don't know why I'm still here honestly I don't I I've had too many close calls to be here but that last smack in the head is the one that honestly I I don't know if this is real or not. I I'm I'm on that journey still so I don't know if it's real or not but what do you mean spiritually with with God oh sure and I don't why I'm here there's something I'm supposed to do yeah uh in this lifetime still because otherwise he should have taken me a dozen times if that's what you believe in.
SPEAKER_00So yeah I think pardon me regardless of regardless of a a religious component yeah I believe to be true and and you know if you listen to the pot at all or anybody's you know interested in checking some of that I mean I believe to be true right that if if a person doesn't know who they are and what they have to offer right you you don't really know what you need. And if you don't know what you need what are we doing? Right. You know I mean the the the the best things in life involve something extremely difficult. Right? I mean in fact you know something that that's easy is is only known as easy because you have to have the inverse of that you have to have something that's really difficult. Yeah yeah right otherwise I mean there's there's nothing to offset that. And and then the other thing I I think a lot about too that that makes me think of what you just said is you know that the greater the responsibility the greater the journey. Yeah it's good. And if you don't know right not suggesting you were doing this but it's very easy for any of us to get into kind of the spinning the wheels motion right and it's just like well this is kind of the way I've always done it. Right. But it sounds like you started kind of asking yourself why a little bit.
SPEAKER_03Well I just got I got you know the company was doing well I was getting comfortable you know I I had idle hands man yeah and I uh and I didn't really have a reason not to do stuff so I still was doing you know I was punching in every day doing my thing it's not like I was I don't know it's a it's an interesting topic because you know you you stopped drinking a few years back and and you made up some you made some definite changes in your life right whether people want to call them positive negative it's not really the point but the the interesting thing about that is saying you know alcohol and am I an alcoholic or am I am I just gonna stop drinking alcohol and oh sure yeah I you know and I I look at it like this I I am going to be alcohol free for the rest of my life. Good for you and oh well alcohol and drug free. Sure yeah but honestly I just I just I see the net benefits that they outweigh the the benefits of of alcohol with my wife and my kids and my family and my grandkids hopefully knock on wood one day and and I'm just super excited for that and yeah I'm just more I'm I'm more punched in now than I ever have been in in a long long time.
SPEAKER_00Well it certainly sounds like it I mean some of the things you've been talking about since you came back from San Antonio I mean it doesn't seem like it's you're not you're not putting on a show. I mean you you're I can tell you're bought in right I mean you're number one you look great. Thank you. Yeah you gotta be down 40 50 pounds I would think I don't know it yeah but see those are the types of things you used to concern yourself with from time to time it's like oh I've lost 30 pounds and it's like great you know I mean obviously great but but you are you're you're extolling that for a reason because you probably just are maybe measuring it because it's a number right seems to me like now whether it's again not to get on like a weird weight thing. Yeah but like it's like no I just feel better. Well how I how I look and present myself I really to the world is is rather irrelevant than how I feel. Yeah right I just want to be healthy.
SPEAKER_03Absolutely yeah yeah yeah and you look healthy man keep thank you yeah no I I'm it it's it's not even a bunch of work it's actually it's something I look forward to every day it it's changed a lot of aspects of my life. Yeah how does it not yeah my wife and I are probably more engaged now than we have been in 20 years. And like I said this is our 30th year being married she deserves a a medal from somebody because that that girl maybe you put up with maybe a medal from you. Yeah she she's she's put up with a lot of stuff and took taken for granted really for a long long time. I mean I have you told her that oh yeah yeah yeah that's a big that's a big thing you gotta do when you get home from this course I went to so yeah you gotta you gotta you gotta get it all out. So what's the name of this thing? Tell me a little bit about it. So the course is called Discover or the the the Discover Benefit Discover Leadership and Mike Jones is a trainer for it. He's got a couple other gals and Susan Jones is his wife and Debbie I'm gonna forget all their names but and then Debbie is another one of the trainers and what they do also is once you've completed the course you can go on team which is now you're a trainer you're you're you're helping them train oh cool other classes which I think I'm gonna go on team in December of this year. So nice the on team thing fills up really quick because people that go through the course just see the benefits and and I'm also told by past people that have got their achievement award for going through the course that on team is almost or more impactful than going through the course. Oh I can believe that. Because you can see it through the eyes of the trainers versus through the trainee.
SPEAKER_00So and you're getting you're getting more out of it because you're actually doing it. Like you're actually facilitating it right I mean it's it's like you could you could sit and watch somebody do something or you could like train it to somebody else and then it just it gets more sticky inside you. Yeah. Right.
SPEAKER_03It just it's becomes more of a way of life right even though it is already it truly is uh it's gonna it's something that I will never stop doing I it will guide me it'll guide me for the rest of my life and I will give it to as many people that want to hear it.
SPEAKER_00So how I mean those are really impactful words and words matter well how do how do you intend to hold yourself accountable for that or or what sort of accountability loops do they offer you when it comes to some of those really strong statements?
SPEAKER_03Well I I'm super fortunate because one of my partners from my work Tom went with me. Yeah so we automatically came home with an accountability partner. Yeah while you're there you also get you somebody they're give they give you a power partner while you're there. The gal that's my power partner is Nicole Washington. She's from northern Minneapolis interesting story I'll just tell you on this one. There's an exercise during the course where you have to tell your power partner you you close your eyes and you you sit kind of just like we're sitting now kind of across from each other but you got to be touching. So I'm holding her hands and the the exercise is tell me the coolest holiday or thing birthday or whatever from when you the the when you were like 10 or 12 seven or eight and the earliest memory you ever have and you know I said I grew up in End and and and immediately when I hear what we gotta do I mean I just start putting these stories together in my head of all these awesome things my parents Christmas birthdays sports just I had I have I have a hundred of them I sat across from her for three minutes and she didn't have one she had zero she's never had Christmas she didn't have a birthday she never had a mom never had a dad her mom was present but not present. She just had a roof over her head started taking care of her siblings when she was seven so because mom was gone and it was one of the most it was the saddest thing I've ever heard and she went first so we have to do this together I I it's my turn. So just understand how miserable that she's bawling her eyes out. Of course and I have a hundred that I'm supposed to tell her about that are awesome. They're the best childhood of everybody anybody in history of life I'm only laughing because of the irony and I I've tried to place myself in that in that environment. I don't want to I don't want to tell her of course not I I just want to because I mean do you want to hear about this awesome snowmobile I got when I was seven because who needs a snowmobile when you're seven but my dad thought I needed one so you're starting to take care of your brothers and sisters and I'm getting snowmobiles. I mean I just have a million of them my mom and dad were great I I try to try to exp try to find a thing they did wrong and I can't and yeah I told her my three compelling stories of my things that when I was 10 or 12 or seven and eight and then earliest one I have and and then I told her three more stories and I when I opened my eyes I said put your hands out like this and so I'm just cupping my hands in front of me and I said I took my stories and I I put them in her hands and I said, put yourself into those stories and from now on they're yours. You can have them. I I don't want them anymore. I'm never telling those stories again. You get to have those as your childhood stories. So anybody ever asks you what your best memory is, use that those. Because it made me so sad that she couldn't even tell me something that made her happy when she was in from 12 to zero zero to twelve. She doesn't have a good story.
SPEAKER_00How how did she receive those stories from you?
SPEAKER_03We cried for a while, and that was that was that. It was it was pretty sad. It was awful.
SPEAKER_00What sort of adult did she grow up to be?
SPEAKER_03She's she's a hardworking student, she's an A-honoral student in high school. Oh, she's in high school? No, no, she wasn't. She I mean, she's A honoral. She she got a job right out of high school, and she does very well there. Her her boss went through the program. Yeah. She didn't have a lot of good things to say about her boss, even though he had gone through the program, which is kind of ironic to me, but sure. But you know, she needed a lot of she's she's got a lot of victim mentality. She needed a lot of help down there. And then do you guys keep in touch after the fact? Or yeah, every day. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We we talk every day. Yeah, it's great. That's fantastic. Yeah, it got me to look through a set of lenses that you you know, you can see this stuff on TV or whatever. But when you meet somebody that needs help, needs assistance, can't, you know. I mean, she's made choices in her life too. Of you know, she's got two kids that aren't hers that she takes care of, and four kids that are hers that she takes care of by herself. And, you know, so that's hard. She it's very hard. And but she, you know, but she chose it. She chose that world, and we didn't, we didn't, we didn't step away from that to go, you poor thing. We should, you know, get off your ass and let's go.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So yeah. Well, and I mean, you know, as we like to say, buy the ticket, take the ride. I mean, you don't show up to one of these types of things, and and I shouldn't say like that, it's one of these types of things. You don't show up to show up to an impactful environment like this without the understanding that you're probably gonna get pretty deep in the weeds with other people that you just met.
SPEAKER_03Well, unless you unless you're me and you didn't Google or refresh it at all.
SPEAKER_00So that's a good point.
SPEAKER_03I literally I I got I got an the interesting thing is you you need to get nominated to go. Okay, you need to go through Mike Jones will call you and interview you and then accept you. Oh, cool.
SPEAKER_00So very cool.
SPEAKER_03Do you know who like how you got nominated, or how did like so earlier this year, we hired Lisa Reich from actually, you know, Oli Ramasker from True North. Yep. So she came over to be our controller at Mission Mechanical, and she had been through the program about 10 years ago, and she just said, You guys need this. You guys, you guys are you're you're working in chaos every day with without an outcome inside. So much of this course is built to create an outcome that you want and then get moving. Yeah, you know, yeah, don't trip fall, fall down, do whatever you gotta do, get up and keep going for it.
SPEAKER_00It's simple but not easy, right? When you say it out loud, it's like, well, yeah, I think this is what I'm I'm gonna, how my day's gonna end. And it's like it doesn't, it's not easy.
SPEAKER_03Murphy, Murphy's coming every day. He he's coming. Murphy's gonna slap you every day and say, Stop it. This isn't worth it.
SPEAKER_00It's not, it's too hard. Well, again, our brains are lazy, right? They don't they don't want to, they don't want to do hard work, they don't want to get uncomfortable.
SPEAKER_03So well, what a what a gift she gave you. Oh my god, that's un unbelievable. I just had my call today with Mike Jones. So during the when you're done with the class, you have an opportunity to take a five week sustainability course with him, and it's all kind of in a book that you do. Um you basically fill out uh you know these questions, four questions every day for five weeks, and then every week you have a call with Mike Jones following up. Oh wow, and he just and and you get Mike Jones for the rest of your life. As long as we're alive, Mike Jones is gonna answer my phone call and and help me through a situation that I'm struggling with. Wow.
SPEAKER_00So that's commitment on his end. What's his story? What's his background?
SPEAKER_03That's awesome. I I'm I'm gonna give you these two books. Thank you. But it talks significantly about his background. African-American guy went to college, basically did not believe that you know anything was gonna hold him back from going to do whatever the hell he wanted to do. Got told in a million times, you know, that you know, race and these things that happened, he went to be a cop, became a cop, wanted to fly a helicopter for the police department, figured out how to do that. He had some he had some tough moments in his life because of you know his race, but he conquered all them and just said that's never gonna stop me. So he's African-American.
SPEAKER_00Okay, yeah, okay. Yeah, so I'm just googling it here. Interesting. I'll definitely do some more some more research on it. Some big, some big names in here as far as companies are concerned. Shell, Coca-Cola. They even have the true north steel logo on here.
SPEAKER_03That's pretty neat. Yeah, Oli and Dan. I I'm I'm trying to figure out how to connect with those guys because they've they've been up fishing with Mike Jones and Devil's Lake. And oh cool. Yeah, he's an avid fisherman. He and they they they utilized a lot of what they're doing, and and Lisa was a big was a big proponent of why True North got into that. Yeah. They've taken that company from, you know, they're they're doing very, very well. So what I am impressed about is to take a guy that you know obviously doesn't need to do this, and after you do it, you find out that it doesn't matter what level you think you are. You can think that you've got it all figured out, but that's all that's not what this does. That this is this is not uh um a guy sitting at a podium telling you how to make more money. That's right, that's not what it is. Right, you know, yep. This is the strategy to make more money. You getting you need your people, you you know, here's your rates, and here's the margins you need, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That is not what this is about. This is about personal growth, getting the people around you to get on team and achieve the outcome that you're you're shooting for because everybody knows what the path is. It this is how we get there. I need all of you to do your things, and and everybody's gotta be. There's an interesting thing in this in this book about you know the wind and the flag. And it, you know, you got your CEO at the top of the company, the guy's making millions, and he believes that he's the he's the flag. The wind is all around him. But that flag lays right against that pole without wind. So, or if that wind is coming at him from every direction, the flag doesn't know which way to go. If you set the outcome, most of that wind comes from the same direction, and it's all going the same way, and you can get where you want to go. So you really gotta plan to achieve your outcome. If you don't plan, you plan to fail. So that's kind of it's just there's there's just there's a thousand of those in in this in these teachings that I've that I've gone through. But unreasonable possibilities, the first book that you that I gave you, is all about compelling stories and and what they mean, how you get how you got built. By the time you're four and a half years old, about 48% of your habits are built. By the time you're 18, 98% of your habits are built. What you're gonna how you think, what you're gonna do, how how it works, who sucks. This I don't like that person. You don't even know why you don't like it. Or I love this. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. You you all of that is already built for you. So I don't know why the O Fimes hate the Johnsons. I've never even talked to a Johnson, you know. You know, but every time my dad drives by him, he flips them off. I don't know why he does that.
SPEAKER_00Well, you just explained uh a lot of the crisis in the Middle East, North Korea, China, South Korea, Taiwan. Pretty good, pretty big crisis here in the United States right now. Well, that's true. Yeah, yeah, we're not immune to that. But it but again, to your to what we were talking about earlier, when it's so much of that goes back to just you know the environment in which we find ourselves in that we can't control until we get to a certain age. And I think so many of us, you know, even even after the age of 19, when, or excuse me, 18, when you know uh I guess the world or society would suggest you're you're ready for it.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Right. You know, and 90 per 98% of you is already built. Uh I don't think we do a very good job as a society letting people know and understand what resources exist for them to to change their structure, right? And and update, you know, just because that's the way you're built doesn't mean that that's the way you have to be.
SPEAKER_03If you uh if you when you find out they unlock something in you that says that you don't have to have that outcome because there's there's 86,400 seconds in the day, and every one of those moments is an opportunity to to think the way you you want to think, not to just go back into your compelling story in the past that gave you the answer for how this is gonna go. Just stupid analogy, but you know, just working with working with a general contractor that historically our efficiencies will be down if we work for that contractor. So that is your story. We're we're you know, we gotta bid this high, we gotta do this, we gotta, we gotta, you know, we gotta keep an eye on this, all that. You've already framed it of how it's going to go before you even started. Instead of just uh setting the outcome for that job and executing that outcome and getting everybody that works for you to also know the outcome and go that direction. So you if you you're just setting yourself up for a pretty uncomfortable nine months or 12 months of a job if you've already known that this is gonna be bad. And then when you get done and you can go, well, I told you. Well, you knew that was gonna happen before you started. So you didn't have to, you didn't have to do any of that. It's just it's a terrible mindset to live in those limitations.
SPEAKER_00Have you read the book Mindset by Dr. Carol Dweck? I don't think so. Okay, I'll give that to you on the way out too. It's one of the books that we've championed on our team is you know, growth mindset versus you know, fixed mindset. And, you know, are we are we operating in a fear-based environment or a growth-based environment where you know every every mistake, every everything that goes wrong is an opportunity versus you know everything that you know, I can't do this. It's like, no, like I mean you can't, right? Like there are there are there are ways to talk to ourselves a little bit better than you know, listen to ourselves, right? That's a that's a that's a John Gordon thing. Um if we listen to ourselves, it's our brains are assholes. So we got to start talking to ourselves in in some of those ways. But back to the mindset book, one of the anecdotes that she provides that that I found most fascinating is back in the vein of children. They take, I think, second graders, so what's that nine, 10 years old right in there? They give them all a, but they put them in teams and then they give them a puzzle. And both teams come complete the puzzle. And the first team is praised for working hard and working together as a team. And the second group is praised for being smart. And then they ask the question who wants to do a more difficult puzzle? Well, the team that was praised for hard work and teamwork, they all raise their hand. The team that was praised for being smart, none of them raise their hand. Of course. Because they don't want to do anything more difficult that might suggest that if they can't do it, they're not smart anymore. Right. Yeah, that's good. And I think back to the way I was raised, I think back to the way I think a lot of perhaps my friends or even my sisters or whatever, it's like, oh, great job on that test. You're so smart. You know, it's like that that's a horrible thing to parent. That's a horrible way to do it. But it's just it's innate, it just makes sense, right? If I tell you you're smart, you're smart.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_00That anyway, that was just one quick anecdote that reminded me of of what you said. When you so when you're going through this, right? I mean, you're obviously in a really vulnerable spot, right? How how did how did that taste for you early, not knowing really kind of what you were getting into, or how easy was that for you to assimilate to?
SPEAKER_03Well, it was it was probably halfway into the first day that I was like, this is not what I thought it was gonna be. Sure. This is this is gonna be this is gonna this is gonna suck.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And I mean, I wasn't wrong. It it it was gonna be I wasn't gonna say suck, but much more difficult than I anticipated and a way different platform than I thought I was going to. Yeah, because there were how many people there? In our class, there was 15. The actually the smallest class he's ever done. Really? And and and and he doesn't lie, so he flat out said this is mu probably my favorite class I've ever done because he got to be with us. He does uh a 30 to 40 room class and he breaks those people up into equal groups. Okay. So maybe if 30 would be 15 and 15, 40 would be maybe 10, 10, 10, 10 or something like that. But yeah, when I found out that this is gonna get deep, this is gonna get into deep, deep stuff. And yeah, I just jumped in. I just said, screw it then. I don't care. But you it put it puts you in some of the most uncomfortable situations that you could ever be in in your life. Really, really tricky.
SPEAKER_00What about that environment or about him, or even just like the actual physical environment that you were in allowed you to open up so quickly?
SPEAKER_03I wouldn't say it happened fast for any of us, all 15 of us, because I got I got 14 friends now that that I I mean I talk to every day. Yeah. It was about the middle of day two, because the first two days are very structured in what they're trying to do, what they're what they're getting you to do. Yeah, almost like military. Like I'm going to break you down so you are at the most vulnerable spot you've ever been in.
SPEAKER_00Any examples you're willing or able to share.
SPEAKER_03Extreme top of your lungs yelling all the things that you that may maybe were detrimental to your growth. I mean, for a lot of people that can be different. Maybe one of the guys in there got beat by his dad. You know, maybe he maybe one of the people there just recently lost a kid to death and they scream that out of their body. Maybe you're in a bad marriage, maybe you're an alcoholic, maybe you not you're not there for alcohol, but maybe you just found out you are you are sure, you know. Sure. Mine was unique because my thing happened in July. I didn't go to this, it has nothing to do with the change. I was already making changes. This just happened to slide in. And again, yeah, again, I don't want to go big religious on this, but it's like something it came at the time where I needed it.
SPEAKER_00To to the point that you made earlier, it's like, no, this is like a journey that I'm on now, right? Like there's there's no winning this journey. There's there's no like the Simon Sinek wrote a book called the Infinite Game, right? Yep. The the the term game implies that there is a a winner and a loser and that there's an end to it, right? It's finite. Well, you're describing there's it's not like, well, I'm good. I don't need to do that anymore, you know?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I think because society won't won't ever let you implement the lifestyle. It you can, but it it it fights against the lifestyle every day. It wants it, you know. You you get to you you're fortunate because you get to. I can take a comment you made and just say, I don't know, man, reframe that a little bit, or let's look at that different. It it doesn't have to be like that.
SPEAKER_00And it's a shift, it's a paradigm shift of of who you are and the in the mindset that you the editorial you, right? Not just you, but anybody that that goes through a uh an event like this that that changes their just who they are and and who they want to be. It's different. And after 30 years together, I would imagine, right? I mean, she starts to get to know you pretty well, and then all of a sudden you start talking about different things and you start, you know, diving into a few different areas, and that takes it's a change for both of you guys.
SPEAKER_03Well, you you know, when when you when you come home from something like this and you've you've you've changed dramatically, and you know, my wife she's been around a long time, you know, she's she's built a structure in her life. And when I come home with a completely new outlook on life, I'm going to interrupt that structure. It does, it's not gonna, I can't not do it. I can't not share what, you know. Her and I are going to be great forever now.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00Did they talk about that? You know, like spouses going through it and you know, kids like maybe and parents with strained relationships, stuff like that, or even healthy relationships, right?
SPEAKER_03I I gotta tell you, there was a 16-year-old kid that's plays football in Kansas. His name is Lars. He uh 16-year-old kid that was in the class with us. Usually 16-year-olds, that's about that's almost too early for master grad because there's different levels that you can go to. Okay. But master grad is the top level you can go through. And how many levels are there? There's like three levels. Then there's a there's a heart of a samurai, which is really cool. You can do as as couples. Okay, really helps build your relationship. And then there's one other they could actually they they'll actually fly out and do some coaching for your your company or your team too, if sure you want to set something like that up. But I think I I would really love it if if Deb went through this master grad course. I think that would be awesome. It's it's just awesome for you to get cleaned. It's like going to get cleaned up, yeah. Yeah. And then I would love to go to to Heart of the Samurai with cool. Yeah. So yeah, it's it's on a ranch in Texas and it's huge. And the it's an indoor outdoor thing, and uh, it's it's just fantastic. Yeah. I just can't. What was the what were the lodging situations like? Well, for some people, this is gonna be a hard thing, but but basically it's a barracks. Okay, almost the closest thing I could come to is a barracks or a college dorm room times three. So take four dorms rooms, and so you get like four people in a dorm. This is 12 people in a dorm. So and the beds, you know, are three high bunk beds. So three high three well, so yeah, so three four corners all four corners have three beds in each corner, and then it's got a you know, a group bathroom, you know, so like four sinks and four showers and four toilets. Okay. But yeah, but fortunately I was in a small class, I think the Are filled up with 12 people, but I mean I had six in my room, and the other room had five. So you guys could could quote unquote spread out a little bit. Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I was I was, you know, you know, you're gonna get a lot of different personalities down there for sure. And yeah, we had a guy from Cancun, two guys from you know, Southern California, Georgia, Minneapolis, Hawaii. Just interesting. And everybody let everybody's at a level, you know, sales or even just middle management and owners, and you know, it's just the the tools that are given to you aren't you don't have to be a CEO or you could be a I honestly I without a doubt in my mind when my daughter finishes college, I want her to go to this class because your path, your opportunity for success increases by a hundred times if you go through this class before you go into the workforce.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I mean, I would think so, right? I mean that that work of of learning who you are, yeah, and what you have to offer, right?
SPEAKER_03What what's in you that you don't even know that's in you? Right. If you if you you're gonna find out that you got choices you can make that are not predetermined. You and everybody goes to their predetermined choice. You know, I don't like tomatoes. It just it just the way it is. It's just I don't know why. Yeah, I just don't like that. Yeah, you know, and and that's it's just so outcome-based.
SPEAKER_00It's that's how you live your life from now on. It's well, you know, you mentioned something that I think is interesting there. You've got uh 15 people, well, 14 including yourself, and and all from different walks of life, different backgrounds, different areas, different everything. But one of the things that's so impactful when you get groups together like that, at least in my experience, is the shared experience or the the the shared, well, maybe to use the parlance, the shared desired outcome of self-improvement. Yeah. Right. So you you could it doesn't matter if you're 16 or 50. Right. If you got kids or don't, if you grew up without a mom or a dad, if you got whatever, like whatever. I just want to be here. I want to be better. And then the the willingness to be vulnerable, as vulnerable as necessary to get out of it. We talk a lot about in our team when we're working, of course, not maybe at this level of vulnerability, but it's like, well, we're all adults here, right? Yeah, we're gonna do some sales role plays. Nobody likes to do that, but you're gonna get out of it what you put into it. I can't make you, I can't make you go balls to the wall on this, but I can tell you that those people did, and they're all at the top of the leaderboard every single time.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, what a big, big deal is is you gotta give to get. Yeah, you got to give hard and you got to give all out every minute of your life. That's I mean, that's just how it works. I mean, you can you got to give emotionally, physically, mind, body, and soul. You gotta give all the time, 100%, all out. It talks about it in these books, they talk about in that class, they put you, they they make you go so far out that you're you're physically and mentally exhausted. Oh, you have to be. You're you're you are gone. You don't even think you can get back up the next morning, and you do, and you get going.
SPEAKER_00And it's when you when you reflect on that, on this experience, and and you sort of talked about it when we were off mic, were there any individuals in there that just refused to get anything out of it, or did everyone come around at some point?
SPEAKER_03There's a very I I I can't tell you if this is real, but if all 15 don't pass, all 15 fail. You have to bring them with you. You get you have to mote motivate them, you have to self-talk to them. And we had we had two or three in our class that just wouldn't go all out. They wouldn't go there, and you and you have to you have to get them to go there. We do the coaches aren't gonna do it for you. And you either get a certificate of of achievement or a certificate of participation. You get one, but achievement you passed. Otherwise, you're just there, and all 15 got achievement. But honestly, you you get to go to a place you would normally never go for a perfect stranger. I'm going to, as a leader in my life and what I do, and you know, I took, I mean, I I gotta step up. And when he said, you know, they they put your percentage on the wall on how if we're gonna, you know, it goes up and down. How based on what? Basically, the chance to get your certificate of achievement right now is at 40 percent. Based on what? Like what what criteria? Whatever number they're deciding, oh okay, you know, whatever, whatever four, four, five out of five out of fifteen, you fifteen of you right now are passing. That's you so you so you know you're you're hitting you're hitting that percent right now. And then, you know, the next day we had a really good, they call it a block. You had a really good block, you know, 70% of you are passing right now. So he would go like, so you know there's five of you or six of you that you're not cutting it yet. Do do they tell you who no specifically you kind of just have to I think the the goal is is for all 15 to think you're one of the six. Sure. Because their expectation of me as a 50-year-old president of a company, I always think of like levels. Okay, so Edgar over here, who's a 22-year-old kid and does sales for auto parts. Well, maybe maybe my level needs to be here and his needs to be here for achievement. Because I'm you know, I've I've I have these traits and qualities already. So, you know, where he needs to get to to achieve passing, maybe not so so maybe I see.
SPEAKER_00I'm with you. Everyone's starting at their own baseline. Yeah, yeah, not everyone's in the same space, not everyone's 50. This isn't a this isn't like a president's only, because they have those, right? It's like you have to be, you know, VP level or higher to get into this course or whatever. It's not like that, right?
SPEAKER_03The only prerequisite would be like at my company. He basically said, Brady, you and one other your partners can come, but no one below you yet, because you need to bring this back for them to understand what they're getting into. Absolutely. Yeah, that makes sense. It you it would do you no good to send a one of our project managers or something like that to this ahead of you because they're gonna come back and you're gonna be like, whoa, settle down. This is out of bounds right now. So it it it would that's why so Tom and I had to go. My other two partners, Scott, Nick, they they're on the list to go in March, and I'm sending three mid-level managers in February.
SPEAKER_00So you're you're all in, and mission's all in. All in. I mean, you're obviously all in, but the mission is uh now gonna begin championing it, not unlike true north.
SPEAKER_03Absolutely. I just don't there's the the there is unlimited ROI on doing it, and it's not inexpensive, but I would just say this for example, I will spend the money to find out that you don't want to do this so you can go find something else to do.
SPEAKER_00Oh wow, yeah.
SPEAKER_03You're you're you're gonna get so uncomfortable at my company if you don't do it that you're not gonna want to be around us. I it's it's it's gonna be obvious.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Sorry, I'm not laughing at that. I'm laughing because I love it. I I love that that idea of this is who we are now. It might not be for everybody. Yep. And that's okay. It's okay. It's okay. And and and you know, you're not you're not responsible for a person's inability or or maybe not inability. You are not responsible for somebody else to want to get better, right? You you you can take people that want, that have the drive, the desire. I've always said, you know, give me the I'd rather hire a 24-year-old kid just out of college who's who's been coached, who likes to get feedback or is at least not uncomfortable getting feedback and is willing to just run hard versus somebody that's you know done it for 30 years and you know has a bunch of bad habits, right? Yeah. Like I'll take the green kid every single time because they're multiple, they want to be coached, they want to learn, they want their right. And that like if if I'm in an interview with somebody and it was like, you know, how do you handle feedback? Well, you know, uh, you know, I don't I don't I don't really like it, or you know, a unreasonable, I'm just you know, I'm really good at this, and you know, you should hire me. It's like, yeah, yeah, we're good.
SPEAKER_03Interesting, you you know, one of the one of the keywords you're using right now is feedback. And we don't use that admission anymore. We use feed forward. Sure, yeah, yeah. And basically it's feedback, it's criticism, it's criticism, it's usually something wrong and all that stuff. So we just don't go there anymore. We just go feed forward. We're not gonna we're not gonna think about what you did. We're just gonna think about how we're gonna fix it. Yeah, and look at the outcome and and do that from now on.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. No, it's funny you say that. It's words matter. They do. Yeah, words, words matter a lot. I've learned that the hard way in many different areas of my life over the years. And I think, you know, one of the things we talk about about too on our team is you know, feedback isn't a swear word, right? It's a positive thing, right? Whether it's feedback, feed forward, feed forward, other other words that have been used. It's like these are opportunities for us to communicate at a deeper level so that we can all get better together. Absolutely. And you're either into that or you're you're like, but that's who we are, right? That that's what we try to facilitate. Facilitate an environment where things grow and good things happen. So no, I love that. I love the feed forward idea. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03It's just you know, powerless words. We we talk about them all the time now. And and you know, we I'm I gotta take it easy on calling them out all the time because uh you know, you get to you you kind of get the eye rolls. Well, you you just yeah, you get the eye rolls, and you it's like you're just you know, you're taking a drug that not everybody has, right? You know, so but you said you were gonna be drug free. Well, yeah, absolutely. I am I am gonna be drug free because everybody does every time somebody tells me, you know, I think I can get that done, I said, You think? Or you will get that done. Yeah, yeah. You know, and they're like, Oh, I will get it done. Okay, well, that's what I thought you said.
SPEAKER_00Even better. Yeah. Well, and then what's so cool about that, even in just that small anecdote, right, which isn't small at all, when you say it out loud like that, right? There's a subconscious exchange that happens in our brains that now we're talking to ourselves, right, instead of thinking to ourselves. Now we're actually we're not only maybe thinking that, yeah, I'm gonna do that, but it comes out as oh, I think I can handle that. Well, that's not the same thing.
SPEAKER_03It's not. If you think you can make the team, like I, you know, if I work hard, I think I can make the team. You give yourself an out. You give yourself an opportunity to be, you know, you use that limitation because you thought you could. There's an exercise they do where you hold up your right arm and he pushes down on your right arm, and he and he says, Okay, I want you to try hold my right arm down. And it's interesting because you do this and and you you're you're pushing as hard as you can, and then I go, now I want you, you will hold this arm down. You I you will not be able to lift your arm. And you with two fingers on that arm, and all of a sudden it's like I I can't, I can't push up on his two fingers. And I thought, oh, this bullshit, yeah, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then I watched it happen and I was like, that's nuts, like just a word. But you when you don't have that limitation, you you get it done. When you tell yourself I will finish this tonight, you don't give yourself an opportunity to not commit to finishing it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, because you you've made a promise to yourself and you don't want to break it.
SPEAKER_03That's the that's the one of the craziest things about this course is when you do make a promise, you're going to do it. So be be careful on how many promises you make yourself. I'm in one right now, Nick. I so yesterday uh I started a 72 or 120 hour fast. Today, in my book, I wrote down that I'm gonna go 120.
SPEAKER_00Okay.
SPEAKER_03So I've extended it two more days, and I don't lie to myself. So that's just what's gonna happen. I unless I pass out and somebody puts an ID in my arm or I get a feeding tube. But so what do you just water? And so I actually did a program. So I did that if you ever heard of burn box, it's I have the thing. So basically, it's four packets of powder a day into water and water. That's what I'm doing. So I do that for five days, and then I'm still gonna stay on that journey, but I'm gonna do like an 18-6 for the rest of the month. Oh, yeah, yeah. You were talking about that the other day, yeah. And then the beginning of February, I'll do another five day. So, and I'm gonna do that for four months and see what see what spits out at the end. What's the outcome you're chasing? I'm just trying to be healthier. Try my uh I'm going to be healthier, yeah. Thank you. Uh, and uh yeah, it's about all accountability, right? No, I'm gonna be healthier and I'm gonna I'm gonna be at about 200 pounds when I'm done with this. Damn, dude. Yeah, yeah. And that's that's coming from like 270.
SPEAKER_00So you you know what? What I've always thought is really cool about you, and I've always respected about you. And probably part of the reason we've gotten along so well is the idea of impulsive compulsivity or compulsive impulsivity, right? Sometimes it it it manifests in the the not the best ways for either one of us. But but I would say your ability over time, whether it's I'm gonna run a marathon, yeah, or I'm gonna, I'm gonna do, I'm gonna lose 50 pounds, or I'm gonna do this, or I'm gonna do that, and you you just do it. Like so you had the tools going into this because you've you've actually shown that you have the proclivity to be able to succeed in an environment of things that are because of your mind and just saying, I'm gonna do it. Yeah, right. Now, I'm not saying that that this wasn't impactful because it obviously it was, but I've always thought that was really cool about you. I mean, you've you've you've you've honored a lot of your commitments to yourself previously. So you got to give yourself credit for those too, you know.
SPEAKER_03I would say most of the time, if I tell myself I'm gonna do something, I don't think I'm gonna do it. And if I say it out loud, I'm going to do it. You know, if I tell you I'm hey, I'm gonna run the half marathon and it's like January, and we're gonna do this thing in May, and you're like, Yeah, dude, great, good for you. And typically I just go, Well, God, I said it out loud. I got I gotta go start training and get it done. So, and I've done I've done that, and again, losing weight or or whatever it might be. I I tend to have had that mindset already. Yeah, again, this just reiterated, or shouldn't say that, it it gave me the tools to utilize those actions better. One of the interesting quotes, and I'm quoting somebody here, and I can't I can't remember the name off the top of my head, but I just loved it the other night, and I think I told you this the other night. But if you argue for your limitations, you get to you get to keep them.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03And and in all my life, uh that one hit me really hard, and I must uh listen to this that quote. I listened to that statement a dozen times because I just wanted to it, it's very impactful to me on uh because of how the many people I've I've been around and and talked to or or whatever, and I listened to people self-talk so poorly to themselves. And you you were talking about that earlier. And I just again, if you argue for your limitations, you get to keep them. It just goes into so many areas of business or or sports or relationships, relationships, and you know, and you you you can't change how you look, or you can't make that team, or I can't, you know, I can't uh get that promotion be because of nothing. It's not there. It's only thing you're arguing, and you will find a reason, just keep digging. Your brain will give you a reason why you can't do it or you shouldn't do it. You know, risk nothing, gain nothing. And it's just I love the quote because I see it in so many people, and it's it's sad.
SPEAKER_00Well, if you're gonna use your energy to to complain or to again, uh you know, visit about your limitations, you you should have to keep them, right? I mean that that should be that should be one of the rules. You you mentioned you came back and and you joined a church. Yeah. Would were there religious overtones to this exercise? Or or tell me more about that.
SPEAKER_03I wouldn't say there was it's not that I wasn't spiritual before. Sure. It's just I wasn't practicing and I, you know, and I it's just a different mindset. Honestly, there's something in me that this is gonna sound crazy, but I'm here talking to you today because I'm supposed to do something. I'm supposed to be here to do something very important because otherwise I wouldn't be here. I just there's there's too many close- It's not crazy at all. There's too many close calls for why I'm supposed to do something for this world or somebody at some point, and maybe I've already done it, I don't know, but I can tell you that this accident I had in July, I've never had anything like this happen to me before. I was I was unconscious for many, many minutes, and I don't remember anything. I don't remember two hours before it happened or ten hours after it happened. Not not no memory of anything. Don't even know how it happened for the most part. Obviously, there was alcohol involved in it, but I still don't know how it actually took place. Well, there was a lot of activity during what was going on at the time. I really never got a dip a good answer from anybody that saw it or anything like that. So but I just that one got me. That one got me that one, that one, I seen the line. Yeah, I I I hit the line of of how much you can risk before you before you get hurt. And and I mean my brother Mike walked up to me and was you know Mike.
SPEAKER_00I do.
SPEAKER_03Mike, Mike walked up to me, and it's kind of one of those things that whether it's spiritual spiritual or not, but he goes, If I don't, if that doesn't kill an opium, I don't think anything will. I I mean I I don't get it. I don't know why you're here.
SPEAKER_00So we talk about outcomes and I'm hearing a lot of intentionality moving forward, right? You know, just intentionality with your time, with your words, with your areas of focus. And There's nothing about that that can be bad. And nothing that I heard you say is crazy at all. I mean, I'm here. Yeah. But I'm here for a reason. Yeah. We're all here for a reason. It's just a matter of are we willing to try to figure it out. And then once we once we believe to be true true that we're on that track, are we willing to take that next even more difficult step to just to continue to realize what that outcome could be, right? And I think a lot of people get either either don't get on track, which, you know, again, I'm not passing judgment here. Who am I, who am I to judge anyone else's lives? But either either people don't want to get on that track because they're they're they're afraid they might fail, or you know, maybe they've been told that they're worthless their entire life, and that's just what they believe. And it's easier, right? To to think that way because you have an you have an excuse for not being successful, or you have an excuse for this, right? But I think some people, and I I've I've talked about this with a few other folks on the on the podcast, is the idea of uh fear of fear of success. I mean, maybe. Like, like what if like what if I what if I try really, really hard to do this and I've I've I've turned this corner and I've become this new person and I've I've I've stopped you know some of the activity that you know perhaps led me into areas that you know less than positive things could be more likely to happen vis-a-vis alcohol, what have you, right? But man, if I do all this and I make all these changes, like what happens if it's not what I think it's gonna be? Does any of that cross your mind at all?
SPEAKER_03I I would say that you know, I don't think my purpose on earth is any different than anybody else. I just I just I've seen it. Yeah, like I I'm I'm recognizing it now. Everybody else has got the same reason for being here that I do. I just want to have mine, I want I want my dash to matter. Yeah, you know, there's two dates on your headstone, yeah. Yeah, and I want my dash to matter. And honestly, I you know, I want you know, I was leaving a legacy already, I just don't think it was the right one. I mean, I was gonna people are gonna tell stories for ten years, maybe not fifty years, not a hundred, you know, and I'm not saying I'm gonna be a hundred year story, but I want to be.
SPEAKER_00Well, you will be because you have two awesome young kids. Sure. I mean And they're they become your legacy, right? They will they will champion, they will continue to champion the things that you bring to the dinner table and bring to Thanksgiving and bring to Christmas and and all the uh you know awesome time that you spend with them, right? So but I understand what you're saying, right? What what what your name is associated with, you we always have an opportunity to update that.
SPEAKER_03Why why can't I be in a history book? You know, I'm just it's crazy to think that way, but no, it's not. But I want I I still don't know what that reason is, and and and I'm gonna I'm gonna keep fighting for that reason to to I'm just not saying it couldn't happen.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So well I'm I'm excited to go on this journey with you, man. I I would love to be, you know, part of your accountability loop and and whatever I can do to to support you in this endeavor, consider me consider me with you. I I I hope you already knew that, but I also know that you know there are certain and this is from my own personal experience, right? When when you start making changes, the circle gets smaller of people that you've that you spend time with. And because priorities are constantly changing and you know who we want to be changes, and bringing it full circle into the just the concept of time and energy, right? Just because we decide or a person decides that they want to get more out of the life that they have left, uh don't just all of a sudden get four, six, or twelve hours dropped on their day. Something's gotta give. Oh, yeah. And and something has to change from a prioritization perspective. Again, could be alcohol, could be a myriad of different things, right? So I want to be here for you, man. I mean, just let me know what I can do to support. And I think this is a great, you know, I guess, second step of of diving into this.
SPEAKER_03I appreciate that. I I it's interesting when you bring that up because yeah, your circle's gonna get different. It's not gonna, I wouldn't say I I don't want mine to be smaller. I I don't have I don't have hurdles in front of me. Like, I mean, you have I wouldn't call them hurdles. They're your beautiful children and your wife and your life, and you know, the things the things you want to go do, those aren't hurdles, they're they're things that you gotta attend to, right? They're opportunities. Absolutely, absolutely. Yeah, I mean you get an opportunity. But from a time perspective, absolutely, yeah. You know, you get the beauty of you right now, as as with Will and Elizabeth, is you get to write the compelling story, you get to form the habits, and obviously I think you're gonna be great at it. So um as well as your wife Alyssa, so that's gonna be a fantastic. But you some people grow up in a house where those those stories and the limitations that they suffer from all their life are built right there. 100%. And uh it's sad because as a parent, and I would I'm one of them that didn't know any of this stuff. I was 20, you know, one, 22 years old when I was raising kids, and I was and I was I just wanted to make sure they got food in their mouth, you know, and and a diaper on. You know, I didn't I didn't realize that words matter. And you know, I was just I was just raising and I've I'm you know, knock on wood, I was fortunate. I raised great ones. Yeah, and I really did. I I mean I'm trying not to speak for myself, but they are good kids. And but it's interesting when you when you think about your your circle, and I've can I've thought about this a lot, is I don't want to lose any friends, you know, and I I'm I have the ability to to be around anybody. If if I lose any friends, they're gonna lose me. It's not gonna be the other way around. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00So that's fair. Again, I don't think it's intentional, right? I think it it's just a prioritization thing, right? It's just a time thing. You know, the the friends you might see when you go out to the bar, right? You just probably won't see them as much. And that's and that's so it doesn't mean you're not friends with them. And that's just not yeah, and that's okay, right? Yeah, you'll find each other in different spots. You have just like we found each other in different spots since I quit drinking and Josh and others, you know, it's like, yeah, I mean, it's certainly not as often, or maybe don't have as many laughs as we used to, but it's like I don't have it in me to have a headache tomorrow because I've got a two-year-old that's gonna be freaking rocking and rolling. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03As soon as the sun comes up, you know. Yeah, you have a you have a very unique ability to connect with people even after a long time. You know, you you you oh that's nice. Yeah, you you do. You have a good way with people and and I don't know. I've just something I gotta, you know, I gotta deal with internally how I'm gonna handle those situations. I I'm not I'm not afraid. I nothing's I have no fear in my body of getting a call to meet somebody for a drink and go and have a drink with them. That's not I'm not even there. It's not even something that's remotely on my mind. But you don't get those calls anymore. Right. That's that's the problem, is you don't get them right because you're not gonna have a beer or whatever your whatever your choice was.
SPEAKER_00And I don't think it's intentional by anyone else to be like, oh, I he's not fun anymore. Like, I don't want to be around him anymore. It's like I think for me, at least what others have sort of told me, you know, on the ancillary through my last three years is like you're uh you're also not a fire starter anymore.
SPEAKER_03Well, that's true. You you know, you're not the guy getting the group together and saying, come on over or or any of that. So when that stops, and I'm not either right now, you know, I'm not I'm not looking at you know getting that three o'clock thirst and saying, hey, let's go over to wherever, you know, from three to five thirty, and then I'll we'll all go home for dinner, you know, with and then we end up staying till midnight, or you know, or whatever. But the point is, is I'm not I'm not my you know, my text chain is small. It's different now. It's different because I I could certainly round up two or three guys at three o'clock any day of the week, seven days a week, anytime. You lived that you were around you know what I mean.
SPEAKER_00I was probably the guy that was texting at three most often. And and I don't regret that either. Oh, mean right. I mean, there's some wonderful relationships formed, you know, albeit some service level, but some deep, you know, and and and very meaningful like like you and others. And I think you know, there's a time and a place for for all of those types of things, if a person is willing to understand or or come to the conclusion, I guess, that you know, this isn't a long-term thing. Yeah. Certainly in the moment I wasn't thinking that way. There's there's there's there's no doubt about that. Yeah. But again, priorities change, right? You you find a great girl, you start having kids, and it's like, holy cow, I'd rather like tonight. I was like, We can you come at eight? Because I want to make sure Will gets down. And I I cherish that time. And you've done a great job of reminding me how valuable that time is. It is in what's Mace, 25, 26 now? 26. Yeah, yeah. Like the number of times over the years you said, God, I just love to have a week of him being the three or four again. You know, how fun that was, right? And it's like, so I don't, I'm certainly not wishing away hours. Another good friend of mine made that that statement too. Like, you're gonna wish you could take him to a ball game. You wish you could take him to, you know, on a on a long golf trip somewhere and yeah, you know, take him to do this and and do all these fun things, which you'll have an opportunity to do, but just don't get caught in that wishing away time. Yeah, because that is a dangerous spot.
SPEAKER_03That's uh, you know, it talks about that. It's just you know, when you if you got a minute or you got a second, you got time to give it your best. Every second. And you know, reading reading another book, big deal. It's just another book, and you know, it's those times were my favorite. I it's I'm so sad they're gone. I'm not I'm not sad because I got I've got I got grandkids, I'm so thankful I had them. Yeah, yeah. And again, I I would say all those times I I don't regret a thing. I don't regret a thing I did in the past. Well, it made you who you are. Yeah, yeah. It I mean, why I wouldn't be sitting here if all those things wouldn't have happened. Same.
SPEAKER_00So same. So this has been great, man. Thank you for taking the time to to do this. I I hope we can do it again, actually, in you know, maybe a little while as you've continued this journey and you know, just kind of recap how how it's been going and talking about all your successes and everything else that maybe that's that this specific course is has opened up for you, but not, you know, obviously that's that's four days that anybody can, I shouldn't say anybody, but it's a lot easier to do something for four or five days than it is to like keep it alive forever, right? And and you're in that process now, and I think that's really that's really cool, and I'm excited to do that with you.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, it certainly is gonna be it's a challenge, and you know, I journal quite a bit now, and you know, I kind of set my path before I even start the day, and then I finish my path at night writing down what I'm going to do tomorrow. So I didn't realize I like writing as much as I do, but I do like I do like picking my outcome and then achieving that outcome. And and if I even if I don't, I bet you something good happens along the way. So, you know, I might not win every single moment, but I win a lot of I win a lot more now than I ever did.
SPEAKER_00That's that's wonderful. I I can't think of a honestly can't think of maybe a better bow to put on our conversation than that statement right there. But I do want to ask, I mean, anything that we didn't touch on that you want to make sure that we that we talk about No, not really.
SPEAKER_03I I mean I'm I'm open, I'm an open book, so uh I'm happy to talk about anything you want to talk about. I more than happy to talk, you know, after you read these books. I would love to catch up with you.
SPEAKER_00So for sure. Well, I um I'll send you I'll send you away with a couple too. I think that mindset book, you again, and it's not when you got to read every single word, but but like anything, you just you you have an interest and proclivity into a certain topic or a subject, self-improvement or or just ways in which a person can attack the day by preparing for the day before. I mean, it's not an uncommon philosophy, but it's a it's a tough thing to commit to and and actually do. I've I've number of times I've tried to do that and just had it fall off my list is scary and embarrassing to admit. In closing, what what do you want people to know about this process that you're in right now and and the outcome that you're chasing?
SPEAKER_03I would say that if the road I was traveling was a hard road. And it was it was a it was fun road. It was, I mean, I've done a lot of fun stuff. Yeah, and I can continue to do fun things without some of the obstacles I was putting in front of myself. I can have just as much fun. To anybody uh listening, I uh I didn't I didn't go to I don't get I didn't go get help, I just stopped. I just did what I needed to do to be better. Yeah, this course is amazing. It it you know there's a lot of reasons. There's a lot of Murphy's coming every day, and I would just say when you say Murphy's coming, Murphy's Law. Yeah, if yeah, if if whatever could go wrong will go wrong, or whatever will go wrong, all that bullshit. Yeah, I I truly believe that there is a force in the universe that whatever can go right will go right, and I and I'm just live that way. I the uh problems are not problems, they're opportunities. And and I just there is change can be made at by anybody. And I again back to my quote just get out of the way, get out of your own way, man. Quit listening to your inside self, telling you that you can't, you can, you can do whatever the hell you want. Man, it's not that hard. You just gotta block it out.
SPEAKER_00Well, I would challenge you there and say that it is hard because you know, in the times when there's times when it can be easy. And I think I the way I process that statement is not to challenge you on the fact that your thinking is wrong. When the times happen in one's life where life just jumps up and slaps you across the face. Yeah. Right. You say things like, uh, you know, my my I I have a reason to be here, right? I haven't fully figured out exactly what it is, right? And then something happens. Yeah. When a tough thing happens. When when it's when this becomes tested, yeah. At a level that perhaps you've never experienced before. Or a I again, editorial you, a person, right? When things start getting tested, you know, it's at those moments. One of my favorite quotes of all time, it's by Kevin O'Connell. Maybe it's not his, the the coach of the Vikings, right? It's be at your best when your best is required. Yeah. My my challenge to my team and myself is, you know, how do you know when your best is required? How do you know that? Yeah. When is it? Well, I I for me today, I don't know when my best is required. Mostly because I have a four-year-old and a 20-month old, right? Right. And but what I did know is that if I kept drinking, there's gonna be a time when I'm gonna be needed and I'm not gonna be at my best.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And I didn't want that for for certainly for me, but definitely for them. Yeah. That's that's or Alyssa by God, right? I mean, she's just incredible. Yeah, not unlike Deb in that way, right? And so I I keep going back to that quote of okay, well, it's it's uh it's moderately defensive.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And it's not that I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, right? But it's like, no, I I can handle whatever is thrown at me right now because I believe to be true more often than not, I'm in a better headspace to be able to receive that stimuli and respond to it in a more favorable way, right? Of course, yeah. It sounds like, well, I'm hearing you say a lot of that. Exactly.
SPEAKER_03I mean, uh one yeah, I said that comment earlier I made is uh about the dash, you know. Yeah, there's two dates on your headstone, and those aren't the only two dates that need to be remembered. I want people to remember the dash. And then another interesting thing Mike Jones talks about in his book is you know, he had some young kid in one of his classes, and it's every time he walked by Mike, he said, YOLO, you only live once. And Mike didn't know what it meant. He he finally he went around the class and said, What I don't know what what's YOLO because he's big on acronyms, he loves them. He just he does all that all the time. And at the end of the class, the kid walked by and Mike looked at him and says, YODO. He goes, What? It's not YODO, it's YOLO. And he goes, No, it's YOL YODO. You only die once, you live a lot, you live every moment of every day, you only die once. So I I thought that was pretty impactful. I mean, you you're looking at you're looking through the lenses wrong when you say you only live once. But he does not take a moment to not tell you to live your life, risk, fall down, fail, get up, get moving. I mean, yeah, that's living. Winners lose way more than losers lose. It's just a fact.
SPEAKER_001000%. Yeah. And there's examples that you can see on TV every day as a sports fan that I know you are, right? I mean, it's yeah. There isn't a there isn't a guy or gal out there that hasn't that that's that's at the top of their craft, yeah, that hasn't gotten their ass kicked.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, and I'm we're not trying to re I'm not trying to regurgitate like these quotes of every self-help book in the world, but uh but they're impactful for you. They are for me.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. And and and and many others, myself included, right? And that's why, well, that's why this entire endeavor for me exists. Yeah, this is awesome. Is is to try to share that with people that might be interested in it, right? Yeah, obviously I'm very interested in it nowadays. So well, and I appreciate that. Yeah, I know. Yeah, well, and so that you're the you're the perfect audience, right? Uh and and guests, certainly. All right. Couple quick hit a couple quick hit questions for you as we wrap up. Would you do the uh Aaron Hills or Sleepy Hollow experience over? Which one?
SPEAKER_03Well, Aaron Hills is probably the coolest. That was the coolest golf experience I've ever had. Ever.
SPEAKER_00And I I wasn't golfing. So for context, Brady caddy for our friend Josh Persons at the US Midam at Aaron Hills with that 2022. Yeah. Yeah.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00Rain delays upon rain delays and 13, 13 days.
SPEAKER_03Shoes wearing out, and yeah, I had to go buy hiking boots. Oh, I had to because Aaron Hills is it's it's not Hills, it should be hair and mountains. It's it's a lot of walking, it's 9,000 yards. It's I think I generally was right around 11.2 miles around. So when we did 36, it was 20, 23 miles. We walked a marathon that day with with 50 pounds on your back on my back. Yeah. And but I wouldn't change a thing about that. I mean, New York, New York uh was unbelievable, beautiful. Where we were, the golf courses both were fantastic. I mean, Aaron Hill is special though.
SPEAKER_00It was it was Sleepy Hollow and Fenway Golf Club, Country Club. Yeah, golf club, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so Most people think Fenway, they might think Boston, right? But this is Long Island, right? Correct.
SPEAKER_03Yep. Yeah. Fenway was really neat. Really interesting golf course. Kind of wide open. Uh Sleepy Hollow was a little bit different, but they sleepy hollow used to be just a tree-lined. Yeah, that's right. They took out all the trees. They took out all the trees. So you you could you could get a little loose there. And honestly, it's too bad what happened in New York, too, because uh, you know, the guy made a 30-footer on the last hole, or we're going to extras. And what we'd have we would have played Hagerstead next if we would have won. Oh, really? And again, and Hagerstead won that year. Yeah. So he beat the guy Josh lost to on the last hole. So and he Josh played perfectly. I mean, he was three or four under par going through the front, you know, three up, and this this guy just shot like 30 on the back and just kind of came. He just won. I mean, he just won. Yeah, it was it was awesome golf. Yeah. And there's just there's some things you just can't control. No, that's that's I mean 100%. I would say Josh was six, somewhere around six under par for the round. And got beat. Got beat. Yeah, it's just that simple. I mean, the guy should probably the guy probably shot even par and six under on the back, you know, and it's what it just happens. So it was beautiful golf. It doesn't happen to me. No, but I've heard it happening to others. Yeah, yeah. I mean, again, uh the what a what a blessing to be able to carry those clubs for him. It's it's such a fun dude, and it's so much fun. And he's a fun guy to travel with. I mean, he's a little clunky, but whatever.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, we had to. Do you say grumpy or clunky?
SPEAKER_03Just Josh.
SPEAKER_00I don't know how to can you explain it? I could, but probably not a podcast. We we should have it. You know what? We should do that. We should have him here to at least be able to defend himself out of it.
SPEAKER_03I I mean, I love the guy. He's one of my best friends. And but I mean, we we ordered it. He wanted pizza, you know. And I said, I'll just give me your keys, I'll go drive and get us one at like Little Caesars or something. Because we've been stuck in this hotel for 13 days. Yeah. So I get down there and I take a picture. I take a picture of Little Caesars in this town that's nothing's open and it's closed. And and I'm like, and I just can hear him just he's just here. I'm laughing. Fucker. It was fortunate though. There, what an opportunity. I went around the corner to a a pizza deli that literally made their, you know, it was like a yeah, they're a pizza parlor that made their own pizzas and it was fantastic.
SPEAKER_00So well, there you go. But yeah, you could have had you you almost had little Caesars. Instead, you got something that actually tasted like pizza. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, no, I would I would say Aaron Hills. Aaron Hills was fantastic. It was that was just such a memorable moment, you know, just to get to where we got to, and and you know, just whether you're not, you know, bad round of golf or ran out of gas or whatever, but who cares what that was. We were there and it was fun.
SPEAKER_00Well, it was fun to it was fun to be there towards the end and and watch oh well. Uh I think Tommy and I were there more longer than we thought we were gonna be, if we're honest. Yeah, you know what I mean? Like, not because we had to in endure any sort of you know weather stuff that you guys had to, but like you guys made it there for the eight, right? No, we were there 16. I think it was the 16th. That's where he played Hagastead. Oh, yeah, yeah. That was a good match. Then we had to go and play Scott, right? Right, yeah, right, and then won that one. Yeah. And then and then it was the semis where he he got beat. Okay, yeah. But that much golf, I mean, you're you got I think to win one of those things, not unlike we've talked about, you know, pine to palm or anything like that, right? Even at at our level, which certainly isn't that, but you know, week-long events like that, you gotta get through one match where you don't have your A game.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00And you just hope that that guy, you know, maybe you got your B game. You hope that guy has his like B minus game.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You know, because everyone's good.
SPEAKER_03They're all good. I mean, I was I mean, I I literally broke out tears when it was over. I was like, I don't I like there's no other emotions left. There's no energy left for other than two. I couldn't believe I couldn't believe that I accomplished getting done. I went I went back to the hotel. I think we grabbed a burger or something. We did, we went over to that tiny bar and uh had a few beers and uh burgers. I took all the you know, those recycling bins that they put in the hotel. I they're they're about two feet high. Oh, sure, yeah. And I emptied everything out of them. I went down to the ice machine, filled them half full, went to the bathtub, filled it full of water, and dumped both my legs in those and drank a 16-ounce glass of Crown Royal and passed out.
SPEAKER_00I bet you felt sound as a pound. Oh, next morning I was right as rain. Yeah, and you get the adrenaline going. That's so much fun. Yeah. All right, so you take Aaron Hills over over sleepy. I'm sure it's a it's close, but uh, but I get it the way you described it. That's a cool spot too. I'd I'd like to go back there and and play. If you had one thing to do over, what would it be?
SPEAKER_03This one's kind of a tough one because I can come back to it too. I got another one. I I know what it is. Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_00It's just a little emotional. Well, uh tears and emotions are welcome here. Yeah, I know, I know.
SPEAKER_03I wish I'd have been a I could have been a better husband. I I wasn't punched in for that all the time. I I was I was a pretty pretty darn good dad in cons you know considering some of the things I was choosing to do, but but I didn't kinda I didn't whiff on the kids, but I didn't probably do the best job I could of for my wife. I gotta I gotta I'm not gonna make up for it. I'm just gonna do better from now on. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Well, thanks for saying that. Yeah. Thanks for being vulnerable. I love that. What's the best advice you've ever been given?
SPEAKER_03I mean, honestly, this is probably pretty young age, but I take risks. I risk. I just see what happens. I mean, don't don't play safe. I rip at it. Well, you do that on the golf course. I I do, but I can tell you this when you get to be over 50, you start pulling out a nine-iron on par fives to get it to 100 yards so you don't go in the water. I don't know why you do it. I think it's an old thing, and you always hit the front of the green. I was like, game for the pin, for God's sakes. What is the deal with that? I think it's age. I'm not gonna do that anymore. I'm ripping at it. I think it's wisdom. Yeah, you play safe. It's wisdom. You know what's the worst part is if I lay up here, I'm not gonna make bogey. But I'm not making eagle. It's true. So I think it's it's silly. Let it rip. I but I've never I've never really done that. I've never played it safe. I've I've never I've never, I've never, you know, you know this about me. I'm not too afraid of anything. Yeah, even I'm not talking about like yeah, I'm talking like if if I see something, I figure I can build it or I could I could figure out how to do it. I I just do it.
SPEAKER_00And well, that's what I mean. Like you have a you have a set of skills that gives you an advantage, right? To succeed where others would fail because they wouldn't even try it. Right. Or or or they wouldn't, they might be a little or significantly more risk averse, right? So you already have a lot of those tools that you and I I don't mean to put words in your mouth here, and I I don't know how this is exactly going to come out, but bear with me. Because you've mentioned it getting out of your own way, right? Like you already have the proclivities to do the things that and and it you define success however you want to define success, but to achieve the outcomes that you want to achieve because of the already innate, you know, behaviors and things that you already have. You are now uh able to actually achieve some more of those outcomes that are based on where it is that you want to be driving towards, right, with more intentionality, because you're to use your words, get out of your own way.
SPEAKER_03I kind of, yeah. I mean, I one of the things about going all in and not worried about anything, it it when you when you have some bad habits, you do them all the way too.
SPEAKER_00Amen.
SPEAKER_03You you know you go, you show everybody I'm I'm better at this than you, and and sometimes that can be uh troublesome, but but in in in anything else, yeah. I mean, most people know what they want, they just don't know how to do it, and yeah, or how to get there. Yeah, or they're willing to or or they know how to get there, they're just not willing to take the steps to do it. Or they don't want to put the work in. Right. Yeah, one of those two things. And and I've been surrounded, I've surrounded myself with group with some great people. So it's been you know, in business now and in, you know, construction and things like that. I mean there isn't a aspect of a building I can't I'm not done.
SPEAKER_00So a a a large thing that that that challenges me is the concept of just because it makes so much sense in my head, yeah, doesn't mean that I I don't need to thoroughly explain it to somebody else, whether it's the process or the or more importantly, the vision, right? Or the outcome, right? If we do these, because in my mind, there's a there's a whiteboard, right? It's like this is the vision, this is where we're going, this is where we're gonna get.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And you need to just listen to the just do what I tell you to do and we'll get there. Yeah. But it doesn't work that way. No.
SPEAKER_03No, no, getting better at it, but but also it's it's I I mean, I'm I I'm I walk the same path as you just talked about. I I just I can tell everybody how to do it. Sure. And then go do that and you'll be fine. But I would never get a good leader behind me if that's what I do.
SPEAKER_00No.
SPEAKER_03You you're just you're just giving them all the answers. And and it's it's it's something I I work on every day to ask more questions than give than you know, give more answers.
SPEAKER_00There's a another great quote. In fact, I have it on a on a canvas in in our workout room. Develop the strength to do bold things, not the strength to suffer.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that's awesome. I love that one. Send that to me. Yeah, I will. Yeah, I I uh I I wrote a I just wrote it today. Brady's life credo. Oh, like a mission statement type thing? It's my it's my life mantra. Your mantra? Yeah, it's my mantra. Yeah, yeah. And there's a good there's a good passage in here. You know, that most boundaries are provisional, shaped by fear, habit, or unexamined belief. I question what is assumed, test what is declared final, and recognize that growth often begins where certain certainty ends. Limits are not verdicts, they are moments of inquiry, inviting patience, wisdom, and resolve. Wow. You thought all that? Yeah.
SPEAKER_00I'm kidding. I I that I'm not surprised.
SPEAKER_03I know. I mean, it's in it's like I said, it's Birdo 3.0 now, so get get ready world. But yeah, no, I I'll I'll let you read the whole thing when we're done. But I'm ready for it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah, I wouldn't let you know. I'd love to Yeah, no, I Oh wow, you've got a nice little background here. What hole is that? Do you know?
SPEAKER_03I don't know. I just asked for a photo.
SPEAKER_00This is special, man. Yeah, go ahead. I am guided by outcomes, not by motion. I do not mistake activity for progress. I begin with clarity of purpose and allow my actions to align with the end I seek, knowing that intention finds its value only when made real. I care to oh, I give care to details because they are the quiet architects of lasting results. Discipline in execution is not constraint, but freedom. The freedom to turn vision into form and effort into me. I lead with steadiness. I choose responsibility over comfort and ownership over excuse. Confidence is not loud or performative, it is calm, grounded, and revealed through constant ac consistent action. Direction matters, and I take care to understand it before asking others to follow. I do not accept limitations as permanent truths. Most boundaries are provisional, shaped by fear, habit, or unexamined belief. I question what is assumed, test what is the declared final, recognize that growth often begins where certainty ends. Limits are not verdicts, they are moments of inquiry, inviting patience, wisdom, and resolve. I value strength, but not at the expense of humanity. I allow myself to feel knowing the emotion, deepens understanding, and sharpens judgment when tempered by discipline. Strength without empathy is brittle. Empathy without strength is ineffective. I seek their balance. This is my practice, this is my responsibility, this is who I am. That's that's special.
SPEAKER_03Thank you. Yeah, I worked on that for a month.
SPEAKER_00Well, I'd say time and energy well spent, no question.
No Title
SPEAKER_03That is that's I hang on that's incredible. In my office, in my bathroom. It's a it's I surround myself with that. Good for you, buddy.
SPEAKER_00I'm really proud of you. I really appreciate you taking some time to share your journey with with us and and with me. And I'm really excited to continue to check in and you know, not necessarily, of course, on microphones, but continue to just cheer for you.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I always will. I appreciate the time. This is what's this is fun. I like getting this stuff out, and yeah, I want to do more of this stuff. I usually kind of just hoard, you know, hoard my own life and everyone does. And uh, you know, I want to help people. I mean, if I can. And if if anybody wants to reach out to me, then you can certainly give them my number. So we'll do. We'll do. Well thank thanks for everything.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I love you, buddy. Thanks for being here. And we'll talk soon. All right, take care. All right, see you buddy. Bye.
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