Not Your Therapist

The Truth About Going No Contact: I Think the New York Times Is Asking the Wrong Question

Kayla Reilly MSW, LCSW

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0:00 | 15:18

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Are therapists really encouraging too many people to go no contact with their parents?

The New York Times recently raised that question... and I think they're asking the wrong one.

As a trauma therapist who works with adult children of dysfunctional and emotionally immature families every day, I've seen both sides. Going no contact can be life-changing for some people—and completely unnecessary for others.

The real question isn't "Are therapists causing family estrangement?"

It's "What happens when someone has spent their entire life surviving family dysfunction?"

In this episode, we're talking about:

  •  Why the conversation around going no contact is so oversimplified. 
  •  When no contact may be appropriate—and when other boundaries might be enough. 
  •  The difference between protecting your peace and cutting people off. 
  •  Why guilt keeps so many adult children stuck in unhealthy family dynamics. 
  •  How emotionally immature parents, family roles, and childhood trauma shape these decisions. 
  •  What healing actually looks like if you want to break the cycle. 

If you grew up walking on eggshells, managing your parents' emotions, or wondering whether you're "the problem," this episode is for you.

Because healing isn't about following internet advice.

It's about making decisions from a place of freedom instead of survival.

🎙️ Subscribe for more conversations about childhood trauma, emotionally immature parents, dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, people-pleasing, parentification, and becoming the cycle breaker your family never had.

🖤 This podcast is meant to feel like a conversation — not a lecture.

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