The ModernZen Collective Podcast
Are you ready to elevate your mind, body, and spirit? Join Lizzy Sutton and Nikki Sucevic on The ModernZen Collective Podcast, where conscious women come together to explore the art of living with purpose, balance, and spiritual grounding. Whether you're a single professional navigating the pressures of urban life or a stay-at-home seeker yearning for deeper connections, this podcast is your sanctuary for holistic practices and personal growth.
Tune in as Lizzy and Nikki delve into ancient wellness secrets, expand your consciousness, and help you discover your true life purpose. We tackle the challenges of work-life stress, the quest for inner peace, and the journey of rediscovering who you truly are, to be able to live in alignment. Here, we embrace the unconventional, celebrate community, and empower you to step beyond societal norms to find balance, joy, and holistic living.
The ModernZen Collective Podcast is here to guide, educate, and connect women ready to transform their lives. Discover a world where balance, joy, and holistic living are within reach. Connect, grow, and thrive with The ModernZen Collective—your space for holistic wellness in the modern world.
The ModernZen Collective Podcast
Embodied Healing: Yoga, Somatics & Self-Care with Sandra Merrill
Mind-body healing practitioner Sandra Merrill takes us on a raw journey from corporate panic attacks to discovering profound healing through somatic practices and sound therapy.
We dive deep into the fascinating science behind why chronic pain often has emotional roots, exploring how our nervous systems hold onto unprocessed experiences and why we sometimes become attached to our suffering. Sandra shares her expertise in sound healing, explaining how specific vibrations can shift brainwaves and break up stagnant energy patterns in our bodies. Her approach combines yoga, meditation, coaching, and sound therapy to help clients release what no longer serves them.
Throughout our conversation, Sandra reveals practical tools from her daily practice, including transcendental meditation, shamanic drumming, and somatic awareness techniques. She discusses how different healing modalities work for different people and shares the importance of feeding our souls through consistent spiritual practices. Her story demonstrates how our greatest challenges often become our greatest teachers, leading us toward purpose-driven work that serves both ourselves and others. Sandra also shares a very personal journey of her daughters health as a newborn, and how she navigated this time.
Whether you're dealing with chronic pain, anxiety, or simply seeking deeper connection to your body's wisdom, this episode offers valuable insights into the mind-body connection and practical tools for holistic healing. Subscribe to hear more transformative conversations about conscious living and spiritual alignment.
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Hi, I'm Lizzie and I'm Nikki. Have you ever felt that your life was missing purpose, joy or deep connection? Welcome to the Modern Zen Collective podcast, where we embrace holistic living for a joyful, purpose-driven life.
Speaker 3:In this podcast, we'll explore holistic practices, consciousness expansion and spiritual alignment. We will dive into personal development practices that connect mind, body, spirit and share secrets that ancient cultures have known for centuries. Together, we aim to guide, educate and connect individuals eager to transform their lives.
Speaker 2:Join us weekly on the Modern Zen Collective podcast and elevate your mind, body and spirit. And now on to today's episode.
Speaker 3:Okay, cool. Welcome everyone to another episode of the Modern Zen Collective podcast. I am Nikki here with an episode with our practitioner, sandra, so excited to have you here. Sandra is in the North Shore area of Chicago as well, in Highland Park, and we met actually through yoga, through Yoga Connections and a teacher introducing us together that we have similar interests, and then now we have her as one of our practitioners in the collective which we are so excited about. Sandra is a mind-body practitioner, a certified coach, certified with sound healing, certified with somatics just a lot of certifications which I love as part of your story, but we are so excited to talk to you about sound healing, somatics, your story. So welcome, thank you for being here.
Speaker 4:Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited to be here.
Speaker 3:I would love to start off with how did you get into this? Did you start this from something that happened? Were you in corporate? Did you move? We always like to hear how you got into kind of this world where you're doing and serving others in these healing ways.
Speaker 4:Sure. So I think from a very early age I really liked serving others. I used to think that I was going to end up working somehow with, like geriatrics, like an older population. It didn't come to fruition, but when I graduated college, I had met my boyfriend now husband who is from New York, and I moved to New York right after college and New York City is just a very intense place to live. We left the city after four years, moved to Ann Arbor.
Speaker 4:I had this like blissful little existence and in 2012, I mean it was just like the best. In 2012, we moved back to New York City and I just I mean I truthfully just like had a breakdown. It was so much free back there and I was just filled with anxiety. I had like my first panic attack. I was in this horrible job.
Speaker 4:I worked for this like very evil man in a corporate-ish setting and I kind of like on a whim like I practiced yoga. I always felt like it helped me. I felt like I'd be like someone who could teach it, but I sort of just signed up for a yoga teacher training. I can't say that I was like the biggest yogi at the time even, but I liked it. I took part in this yoga teacher training and it was like a three month every weekend experience and it was life changing.
Speaker 4:I mean, I went from being like super anxious, high strung, like working for someone I hated, to being like I could go to work every day and like I could look this guy in the face and like respond and be a human and feel good about what I'm doing, and it just like really opened my eyes to this other world of like how I can show up, you know, and how I can then show up for others. So, you know, I lived in New York. It's a very expensive place to live and I continued to work in that setting and I ended up getting another job. Actually, um, that was better, but I always taught yoga on the side and I like started to fill my bucket with tons of certifications. So I became certified prenatal and postnatal. I did like mindfulness, a mindfulness-based stress reduction, meditation, training um, all of that. I went on to have kids kids, yeah, sorry if I'm going too fast.
Speaker 3:No, this is amazing, okay, yeah this is the 2012 to 2016.
Speaker 4:Call it um. I went through IVF with my first daughter and I wasn't teaching then because it was like a very um, it's an invasive way to get pregnant and it was a lot. So I kind of pulled back on teaching. But my meditation practice became something that was super powerful for me and like I couldn't go to bed without meditating or like visualizing like having a baby, like however that looked, and kind of starting to tap into that spiritual side too. Me.
Speaker 3:The book that was like basically, asking like Asking it Is Given is the name of the book and it was like, yeah, you've really heard of the Hicks book.
Speaker 4:Yeah, so starting to kind of get into that world like I would ask every night, you know, for what I wanted? And I put things out there into the world and I started to feel things come back to me, you know, and I ended up getting pregnant and was fortunate to give birth to this beautiful human. And you know, and I ended up getting pregnant and was fortunate to give birth to this beautiful human, and you know she's my oldest daughter and all that wonderful stuff. Right, I continued to work. I was working for Columbia Business School at the time in the entrepreneurship summer and it was like a really dreamy job.
Speaker 4:I got to help entrepreneurs launch their careers and at that time I became became really interested in how can I get more curious about what people are doing and why they're doing it? So I already had this yoga background, this meditation background, but I was really fortunate to be able to become a certified coach at that time. So that was 2016. My practice was mostly working with entrepreneurs and it was great. And then I had my second daughter and when she was born, she was diagnosed with epilepsy. So she turned blue in my arms when she was a week old. Oh, my God yes.
Speaker 2:I know it gets into a lot.
Speaker 4:Wow, yeah. So she, you know she has. Both my children have taught me so much. But that experience, you know, I was running back and forth to the hospital. She, multiple times, like, had these seizures. We didn't know what was happening until she was six weeks old, um, she was admitted to the hospital. I was obviously there with her. She's my baby. Um, yes, and it was a whole, I mean very traumatic experience. Yes, yes, wow, yeah, I know it is a lot yeah.
Speaker 3:That's a lot. That is a lot. How, when that was happening with your daughter, were you like increasing your meditation, or did you? How did you feel? Because I feel like you know you would want to be so present with what's going on and have that ability to you know, try to control as much as you can, because it's your daughter, but then you have the spiritual side you've been building the foundation on.
Speaker 4:I mean, it's interesting that you say that it's like the spiritual side, just like I couldn't tap into it. It was so. It felt like, you know, like when you have fight or flight. I mean, like my nervous system was just in complete overdrive. I was like a panicky mess, like I didn't I think back to like her first year of life and I had this you know beautiful three-year-old daughter. I have this baby and she was like put on phenobarbital, which is a barbiturate. It's like a very big downer and she slept all the time and she wasn't meeting milestones and I was, I mean, I was a wreck. I was like standing over her crib, like are you breathing, are you blue? Like you know, call 911 for my baby. Multiple times.
Speaker 4:It was like a, it was um, it opened my eyes but at the same time, so okay, so I, I, I was not meditating, I was not meditating, I wasn't tapping into those practices. However, I was developing a lot of pain in my body at the time. So I had, like a no apparent reason, foot issue and we lived in New York and I walked everywhere, so, like I had a baby in the carrier, I had a boot on a foot. I'm holding the hand of my three-year-old, your three-year-old, Right. Hold it all together. I mean, we were a sight. I feel like that year was like the sweatiest year of my life. Oh my God, it was like crazy.
Speaker 4:I was trying to deal with the pain and I worked with a doula when I delivered both my children without medication, in a hospital setting, but without medication, and I worked with doulas both times. And my doula put me in touch with this postpartum doula who, fortunately for me, I lived in Harlem at the time. She happened to live like around the corner from me and she was also an acupuncturist. I mean, she saved my life. Like, I still talk to her.
Speaker 4:She truly, like she gave me acupuncture. She helped me with the pain that I was experiencing in my foot, but she introduced me to John Sarno's work and that was when I, like, really learned about this mind. I was a yoga teacher. I knew about the mind-body connection, but I learned about it in this different way of like. Oh my God, my brain is causing me to have pain. I don't have an injury in my foot, I just went through this. Childbirth itself is a traumatic experience and then I went through literally watching my child lose consciousness, turn blue, you know like adding the layers of everything, yeah, while you're trying to do everything in your possible realm of possibility to help, yeah exactly, Exactly so.
Speaker 4:Um, yes, guys, her name and she introduced me to John Sarno's work in such a gentle way. She was like I just think you should read this book. Like your pain is real, what you're experiencing is real, but you're you also have been through so much. Um, she did a lot of work. I think it's called havening I hope I'm not getting that wrong where, like I would um, hug myself and like actually like rub my hands on myself while I told the story of, like the trauma that I went through and I could like literally feel the trauma release from my body.
Speaker 3:And it was Wow, how long was that. Was that like a practice? You did an hour with her or something, or was it something you did at home in the mirror?
Speaker 4:Okay, I did that for her. She like held the space for me and I cried and it was amazing and I like started to feel better and like I didn't need the boot and I didn't have pain, and I started to like, in my own life then, research this mind body connection. And within that year too, you know, I had had a nanny because I was working full time and I had intended to go back to work and I felt like I couldn't. I felt like I couldn't go back to Columbia as much as I even loved my job. It was hard not to go back. But I decided to scale back and focus more on my coaching practice and to kind of research some of these things on my own. And so that's what I did when I was in New York and while I was figuring out life with Liv, who was having these seizures, and and figuring out her medication and all of that stuff.
Speaker 4:So that was like kind of like I pulled back from helping other people and it became a time to really kind of help myself, except I was still helping people in the coaching setting.
Speaker 3:But when we need that foundation, we can't teach what we don't know already you know in our body and everything. So having that experience and being able to work on yourself, build that foundation and then help others, just like your acupuncturist did, she did that from her experience and what she knew. And I'm such a fan of John Sarno's work. When my boyfriend and I got together five years ago, his mom was having chronic back pain and I recommended healing back pain for her just to read. It's such a, it's such a quick read, it's so small and it just really opens your eyes to how we store all of this in our body and it's I don't know, we're not taught about that. We store it in our body. So for you know what a gift that you had that acupuncturist to make that connection of. You've had so much trauma and trauma you know.
Speaker 3:There's also that book Is it Waking the Tiger? That talks about how kind of the foundation of it is that animals, after they experience trauma, shake to get rid of it. Yes, and that's super quick. Like they know, they just got into a fight, they just did this, they just did that. They don't feel well, they shake it and then they keep moving on and as humans we move so fast but we never process, so it just stores and stores and stores inside of us and then we either have, like you had and most of our practitioners.
Speaker 3:The story and the origin of how we all got to where we are is that something happened. We had a panic attack, we decided life shouldn't be like this and we turned a page. That's how it starts and then we can serve others through that. But I want to explore you know, somatic is such a buzzword out there and just kind of peel it back a little bit about what it really means. Are these memories stored in our cells and our muscles? Is it in the brain connection keeping us safe? I would love to hear what you know, what you've learned about this somatic connection in our body and kind of the foundational pieces of it, for anyone who's just hearing it for the first time or has heard it tossed around and just wants to learn more.
Speaker 4:I mean, I think, to answer that question, it's stored in all of those ways, right? So, like we experience something and we push it deep down and that will be stored in our muscles. Our muscles might tense and we don't even know right, and so, like, suddenly we're sore, or it can be stored, of course, in the cells. It can be stored in our tissues. Fascia is a really big component too, probably from your yoga too, that you've learned. You know, when we open up our fascia we release all of this pain and suffering that we've had, and so much stems from our mental overload. I mean, I think, when you talk to anyone unless there was like an acute injury, like someone gets hurt and broke a bone, you know like, obviously, like you hurt yourself, you're going to heal.
Speaker 4:But like I also have suffered from back pain. My older sister has metastatic breast cancer and she one day was in an exercise class and she like called me and she was, like my back is totally out. I didn't really do anything, but like it just was out and like at the time like'd been on a medication for 20 months and it had failed and she was like ready to move to a new medication. She was gearing up to go spend like six weeks in Florida and like she couldn't move. And I was like, marty, you're, this is your like, think about everything happening in your life. Like you are someone who is very actively and fully living with stage four cancer throughout your body, of course you're gonna wake up and not be able to move. You know, and yeah, she got into john sarno's work and she started journaling and and, like you know, following his prompts to to um, to kind of release some of this tension in her body and it really the pain is real. I think I'm jumping around and not really fully answering your question of, like where it's stored or how it's stored.
Speaker 4:But you know, we, when we talk about pain or when we like think about pain and that word somatic or that mind-body connection, we store the pain in our brain and our cells and our body and we keep it going because we keep talking about it.
Speaker 4:As, like my back hurts I can't do this like because my back it becomes our story, becomes our story, becomes our story and then we just hold on to it and we suffer and it's from recognizing that, like I have the power over my story through both um, you know in in my somatic practices and how I think about it. Like I teach yoga regularly now and when we are in pigeon or in a hip opening pose, you know your hips, your lower back, your legs, your psoas, like it holds so much, we hold so much tension in our legs. It's an opportunity to release and I talk about that like we stuff like a lot of things down into that part of our body. How can you now stretch and open it up and consciously know that you're releasing that, to know it's okay that you're in this posture. You could cry and like let it go, because it becomes an emotional release also.
Speaker 3:Yes.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Uh no, we hold so much in in our hips and in in that area and, um, like something you said, um, I triggered something else for me to ask you. So you know our pain can become our story, whether it happens from zero to seven, when we have our imprintable years or when we're older. So you know, someone could say I have this chronic back pain. That's just who I am. I have back pain, I have back pain. It's hard for me to fly. You know, whatever that story is. And they get introduced to something as you know, a somatic practitioner or yoga, or stretching, tai Chi, qigong, john Sarno's work, whatever it might be to release.
Speaker 3:Be so attached to this is their embodiment of who they are that they don't want to actually heal. And Joe Dispenza talks about that. How you become so attached to almost this appendage of who you thought you were that it's hard to release that, because the fear of the unknown of what that new life could be is. You don't know what it is, so it's scary for your nervous system. But you know who this is. You know you wake up with pain and this is familiar to you. Is that ever something while you're coaching? That either comes up and you work through Like what do you? Has that ever come across like what you've been working with?
Speaker 4:Yeah, I mean, I think yeah, and in so many different ways. Yes, Like we do. I think that the word attachment that you just said is something that really comes up a lot. We do get attached to how our bodies feel and to the diagnoses that we have, and you know, I have back pain, that's your story, I have. You know this.
Speaker 4:Yes, whatever it may be, we become attached to and I think I do help people to work through that, whether it's through the power of meditation, whether it's through the power of sound vibration, talking, coaching, one-on-one. It works for people in different ways, but it is finding that place of non-attachment. And I think, thinking about my own journey and starting my yoga teacher training in 2012, it was like that's what I learned, like how important the non-attachment piece was. And, of course, like I'm a human, I still gravitate towards attachment. It's a process I think most people do and it doesn't matter kind of how elevated you are in your meditation practice or life or any of it, like we all have those things. But the awareness of the attachment and the feeling like I could name that fear, I could see it, I could walk through it, I can envision my life on the other side Like those sorts of practices are really helpful with my clients to get to that other side of the pain.
Speaker 3:Yeah, for sure I want to go into the practices you use with your clients. But first I want to ask you the practices you use with your clients. But first I want to ask you when you were working with that boss that you did not particularly enjoy and panic attacks, you know those things that happen. You started your yoga teacher training. Do you believe it was the somatic embodiment of moving the stagnant energy? Or was it having that awareness like 90% is like the awareness and then realizing that you get to control your reaction, not how your boss acts, like, how, like what was it that when you started showing up you realize, oh, I can just have a conversation with him and look him in the eye now?
Speaker 4:Oh, that's such a good question. I think it's a combination of all of it. It was like you know, the intensity of a yoga teacher training is so powerful. It was like being in community. I think there were a few things.
Speaker 4:One, being in community, I think, was hugely powerful to realize my job was only my job. It didn't actually define me, Like it was how I got my paycheck and that's what it was. You know, I could put up with anything. I had to be there for, you know, eight hours in the day, so I had to be there for eight hours in the day. I had this beautiful community outside of that who knew me and supported me. So that was one really good piece. I think the learning, the teachings of yoga and being able to really start to tap into my spiritual side really powerful. To like think, like, oh my gosh, I could move my body and feel more connected to the universe at the same time, Like like crazy when I just like say that and think about it, but it's for me that's so true and so powerful. Like I could move and lay in Shavasana and be on the floor and feel like the tingling sensation of all the energy around me.
Speaker 3:Like yes, yes, and really feel, and really feel that energy. And like what you said about being human, we're human and we're met with things and we become attached and we have resistance and all of these things. But repressing this trauma and things like that is also sometimes the fear of feeling that unsure of how that'll feel when you process it. Like, how is it going to feel when I revisit this thing? That happened and I, you know, allow it to move through my body and I, I truly believe, you know, through yoga teacher training myself, like you are saying, you know even the yamas and niyamas, like learning these, very like deep principles that are so, just, so simple, over complicate everything as humans, but they're so simple just for self-respect and non-violence and and things like that.
Speaker 3:Um, and that really allowed me to feel through my body when something was coming up, like, of course I'm human, I still repress, push things down, start to get my to-do list done, and what the yoga teacher training and teaching it myself has really helped is I can tell when I feel that, oh, I'm a little frustrated or oh, I feel this pain, like you said when we started. So I can, you know, really embody and feel and and and allow those feelings to come forward, like how you work with your clients, allowing you hold the space for them to allow those feelings to come up that it's going to feel great on the other side. Let's get this kind of moving, moving through your body love.
Speaker 2:We'll get right back to the episode in just a moment. But if you've been craving more grounding, guidance or just a moment of peace in your day, you're going to love the Modern Zen Collective app. It's your personal sanctuary in your pocket. For just $3.99 a month, you'll get access to our exclusive guided meditation rituals, energy updates and soulful workshops, all curated to support your spiritual journey in real time. You'll even get timely push notifications with astrological insights and intuitive reminders to help you stay connected to your highest self. So if you're ready for a little more intention and magic in your everyday life, just pause for a second head to the App Store or Google Play and search Modern Zen Collective. All right, let's get back to it.
Speaker 4:Right, yeah, yeah I think one of our mutual yoga teachers, karen, says like you know, we move our bodies to like jumble it all up. So then we could like go back out into the world and like put it all kind of back together and like we do that. And that's where the movement piece comes in and why it's so powerful. Because we do, we put our body whether you're doing yoga or you're running on the, I don't care what it is, movement is totally medicine. But there's also and I just think, a lot of times in our society we only focus on that. So there is a yin and a yang right, and a lot of us humans focus on the yang, like it's good to work out. We put it out there that like it's important to move and exercise and be fit. But you need that yin piece too, where you're slowing down and breathing and you're meditating.
Speaker 3:And I like to think of the work that I do, as I mean I do both, but it's to give the yin, because I don't think we get enough of it in our lives, I don't think we give it to ourselves enough, yeah, and we almost feel that we don't have time to carve out the time. Like what's that quote? It was like Tony Robbins or someone said if you don't have five minutes to meditate, you should be meditating for 45 minutes because, you need to like open yourself up, to slow down.
Speaker 3:So with that, you know, say you're working with someone or what are you? What's your toolkit? What is your toolkit for these somatic practices to you know, heal, to release, to feel, to feel how you felt when you started showing up. You know in your job and you felt really aligned and how you work with clients, like what are the things that you use to help them?
Speaker 4:Sure. So I do rely a lot on my coach training. So that was my one-on-one coaching experience. I went through a school called Coactive Coaching CTI was what it was called and it was the idea that you meet your client where they are. You see them as a whole person, you're able to kind of talk through whatever it is they're going through, help you see them as a whole person, you're able to kind of talk through whatever it is they're going through, help them visualize the other side. Help them visualize, you know, sit with them while they're processing the pain and experiences their feelings.
Speaker 4:But I think I'm fortunate to have this other side where I could take all of that the empathy and the understanding, the curiosity of working with clients in that coaching capacity and then couple it with everything I've learned from yoga being able to move your body in a certain way, standing up and just standing in a big star, and being a huge, vulnerable, amazing person. You are on a call with me. That's big. So I use a lot of yoga. I teach yoga, obviously, to the community, which is for me just such a powerful way to give back to people in my neighborhood you know, to be in this yoga studio, let people melt on the mat at the end of the class. I offer sound healing and I find sound to be so interesting because I feel like when I do lead sound healings, whether it's for a group or one-on-one, I can so deeply feel the energy that other people have in the room and bring to the space and I find that I play the sounds based on that. So there's no plan.
Speaker 4:I get to like kind of go in authentically feel the space, which is really cool, and let the sounds and vibrations wash over people and help them to release what they're holding on to. One of the really powerful things about sound healing, similar to meditation, is that it slows your brainwaves so it brings you to this different space. You kind of can go to an alternate world if you will and relax and release and reset in that space. Yeah, and then obviously my meditation practice too. I have a lot of tools in my kit I love it, but it's all.
Speaker 3:There's a variety for anyone who might not feel connected with one another one would help them exactly.
Speaker 3:Yes, let's talk about sound healing, because I've had sound healings before and have felt absolutely amazing. I feel after a sound healing like I had a beautiful acupuncture session. Almost I feel really aligned and relaxed. I feel like you're saying can almost, you know, detach in that as a meditative practice while the sound waves are going? And something I've always been curious about is you know, know, is there a science behind it? What are these frequencies we're working on like? What is it actually doing for us? Let's talk through that, because I know you've had your training in that as well about, like, sound healing, tell us. Let's get to the foundation of sound healing too, which I'm so curious.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I mean sound healing.
Speaker 4:Basically it's another tool that provides us with a way to tap into our parasympathetic nervous system to really start to allow us to slow down.
Speaker 4:But the idea with it is that we all have vibrations, right Like we are energy as humans, and we have an energy kind of field around us, within us, all of it, right, everything is energy and these sound vibrations emit energy too. So you've been to a sound healing using crystal bowls and other instruments, I'm sure Oftentimes, like even if you plugged your ears and couldn't hear it, you could feel it because it is literally energy moving around. So the idea is that the vibrations break up, the vibrations of the energy around you, around your own energetic field, and allow things to kind of release. But one of the really big ways of doing that is that your brain does kind of go down to this slower level. You get into a meditative state. A lot of times people report, you know, seeing colors or having visions, or meeting their like spiritual guides and it all happens because you enter this quieter space in your mind that exists within all of us.
Speaker 4:We usually just get very caught up in the chatter and the sound is a way to kind of remove the chatter and let you go there.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and when you say you feel like obviously you're spiritually connected, you have a spiritual gift we all do, but I feel like you've worked on yours and opened it up so you can feel energy rather quickly and clearly. So when you're in a room of five, 10, 30 people and you're doing this sound healing, tell me how that feels in your body. Do you feel tingles? Do you feel an intuitive download that says we should, you know, work on this frequency or use this bowl Like how does that come to you?
Speaker 4:Kind of both, honestly, like I feel, like it's so subtle, I'm like I know no one can see me right now. You can, but I'm closing my eyes because it's like it's just this I do think it's an intuitive download as part of it. You know, like I'm not, I'm, I'm I don't think of myself as a medium at all, like I haven't really tapped into that side of myself. I probably have the ability. It's just not where I've gone, but like I do feel like I could tap into kind of like the, the sensation that people are bringing to the room. So again, it's like I'm using this word energy a lot, but like I could just sense, like is there like a lot of stress, is there pain, pain, is there sadness or is there just like openness and kind of feel that in this way, when people come in, again it is subtle. Um, and then I kind of play to that.
Speaker 4:My, my teacher, actually, when I did my sound training, he was very big on like, yes, there are notes and vibrations that open certain chakras, and like, yes, there are ways that we can release energy. But it's all about how you as the practitioner feel. So like if you feel what you feel the room needs like tap into that authentic, knowing side of yourself and give that gift to the people in the room and that's the way they're gonna leave, having had the most powerful experience. And that was really powerful for me as a student to hear and be given that gift to do.
Speaker 3:Yeah, given that gift and given that freedom of autonomy, which I feel sometimes can take several years to get over once we're in corporate, that we think everything needs to look perfect and be perfect. And oh, I made this tiny mistake and I put the instead of than in the email and they're going to annihilate me right? It's like these little things and I really feel, with yoga teacher training and then with what you're saying, when you're learning the art of detachment, and it's such a, you know, to get into enlightenment is always a goal, but you're growing and growing and growing to get there and we're supposed to be human and have these experiences, so we keep learning and growing as we're getting there and just having that detachment of if I make a tiny mistake, it's fine, it actually even the word mistake isn't a bad thing. That's how we learn.
Speaker 3:That's how we learn as children, right and um it for you to feel that you know with what it, what the um the group needs. And also you know, do you do that in your yoga practices? Do you go, do you plan, like today I'm teaching a slow flow, this is my foundation, but I feel that they need hip openers. I feel that this like do you do you evolve? Like in your practice as well, like kind of the same feel.
Speaker 4:I, I do, and I find that the times that I don't are the times that my classes are less impactful. So when I'm able to feel like I mean, for example, when I started teaching at yoga six and Highland park with you, like I wanted to follow, yoga six is way you know and I felt strongly about that I, like I wanted to make sure I was doing, and I still do want to obviously follow the the, the way that yoga six wants us to teach the classes.
Speaker 4:but I also, um, no like once I was given permission to kind of like use that as my base, and then let the class kind of evolve.
Speaker 4:I felt that my classes just got so much better. So I think there's both and I always find that in general, even having this conversation with you, like I could prepare until the cows came home, but like I was having a conversation, and it's so much more authentic to just show up and be authentic. So, yeah, to take the energy in the room, go on what people are feeling and needing and kind of get out of my own way, because sometimes I think I do run hot. I am naturally kind of an anxious person, so it's something I'm always battling. And when I'm able to get out of my own way, listen to my inner guide, listen to my intuition, trust myself, I'm able to give so much more to the people around me.
Speaker 3:Oh, yeah, for sure it's that. Put on your oxygen mask first. What is your daily routine? Does it evolve? Does it change? Are you very fluid in it? Do you like to keep structure? What do you do to keep this? Because obviously you are teaching yoga, you have two small children and you're managing so much just in your you know, balancing all of it. What. What is your like? What are your go to's to make sure you continue this practice, like for yourself?
Speaker 4:Sure. So in about a year ago I became, I learned transcendental meditation and I'd always meditated, but it was a lot of times listening to different apps or just using my own mantra, and I have a more formal mantra now. So I like to wake up and use my mantra. It's supposed to be for 20 minutes. I can't say I always give myself 20 minutes, but I like to get in 10. And I try to meditate for 10 minutes every morning Is that when you first wake up, before anything.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I brush my teeth because I like to brush my teeth. Yeah, I pee, yeah, but like in my pajamas, and I find that the mornings that I don't do that are my harder days.
Speaker 4:So if I skip it and I am human, I press snooze on my alarm clock and I blow through the things that I'm supposed to do, because I'm tired and I blow through the things that I'm supposed to do because I'm tired, but I um the days that I follow that and just wake up with meditation, I feel really good. Um and again, when I do that, like if my kids are in school or whatever I, I like to do that before they come home. So in my transitioning like transitioning from sleep to awake and transitioning from, like, my time to being back on as a parent, I find that if I give myself that 10 to 20 minutes of meditation, I'm like much better.
Speaker 3:Is it always transcendental Like? Are you always using mantra?
Speaker 4:I use mantra the most because I could do it anywhere. It's like I don't need a phone. I don't. I just a lot of times, like I meditate in the pickup line when I'm picking them up from school. You know, oh, I love meditate in the pickup line when I'm picking them up from school, you know, like in the car, and it's like who cares where you are. There's nothing special that has to happen.
Speaker 4:My only worry is that, like I'm going to fall asleep because sometimes I do, which is just a sign that I'm tired and my body needs that. Um, it's okay to fall asleep in meditation. Um, it just means your body's tired. That's what you're saying. Like, yeah, literally, it just means your body's tired. Like you just need that reset. Let yourself fall asleep, wake up, like that's what you're going to need. I also, really I have this amazing shamanic drummer who's a friend of mine and she has taught me how to travel kind of to the upper and lower worlds through drumming. And I do have a YouTube like sound of it it's not really a video, it's just the sound of the drums that it's 15 minutes and that is also an amazing reset. So I either do that the TM, or I do the drumming and that kind of lets me connect more to, like, my spiritual side and guides on each side. I mean the TM does as well, the mantra does as well, but it's a different technique.
Speaker 4:And then I also I I mean I'm kind of answering your questions a lot of ways I've recently started studying kabbalah also, and it's been a really powerful tool for me too to just kind of tap in, see how my life unfolds you know, there's a lot of big things in my life. I mentioned that my sister has metastatic breast cancer. You know like there's different stuff that it helps me to kind of deal with. And then I do practice yoga pretty regularly.
Speaker 4:I teach and I like to also just work out like a person. I like to lift weights and stay healthy and eat well.
Speaker 3:Yeah, all the stuff, all the stuff, also with the toolkit. Yeah, exactly, I would love to link that drumming if you're open to it, if you would share it with me and we can link it in the show notes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 3:What a beautiful way to, kind of you know, be able to travel and feel your energy traveling, like that's you know, and such an easy thing to do, just to you know, plug in and listen to it and allow your body to move. Absolutely, allow your body to move. But what you said about the days that you and sometimes there might be emergencies or something happened or whatever, and you can't do your mantra in the morning and we can feel inside of our body that that day was a little off and that day was a little weird, I'm sure you feel this with coaching, but I had a coach, an heat she's actually. She did our first launch workshop when we launched modern Zenco, and I remember coming to the coaching call with her and everything was going wrong, like my car had was in the shop, was going to be thousands of dollars and this like just a million things piled on top of each other. And she's my coach, so I'm unloading all of this on her and she holds space for me, she lets me unload it all for her, and then she looks how's your practice going? And I was like what are you talking about? I have no time for my practice. Everything is going wrong in my life. And she's like, just look at the comparison, like when you have a practice, when you follow, and I can, she's like I can clearly tell when you're stepped off of your meditation practice and meditation practice.
Speaker 3:And then she had that also, that perspective of detachment, of sometimes it can be jarring too because we're so attached to our pain. But that perspective of, well, aren't you the one who chose to buy a car? You bought the car, so it has problems. You bought it. No one forced you to get this. Like you bought it. That's your car, like this is. It was very interesting to have her perspective. So you saying that you know like sometimes, when you don't have your practice or you feel like you become, you know that human part. You know, and it is such a reminder of, oh, I and I have and what and how empowering it is. I have the ability to come back to neutral, come back to detachment and you know, take control of how I handle and look at things, just from having even a five-minute practice of meditation or mindfulness or whatever that may be Absolutely, and I think two different people from two different perspectives described it to me this way.
Speaker 4:So one is a friend who has been studying Kabbalah for several years and then another is my shamanic practitioner, who I love dearly, and both kind of described it as a way of resetting your soul, and I love that because I do very firmly believe in like. This is my vessel, my body is my vessel, but my soul is what continues to go on, and I've thought that my whole life, right Like when we die, I don't know what happens, but I know my soul is probably going to continue because of this energetic field, right, it's infinite.
Speaker 4:So why wouldn't you feed your soul? It's like literally giving your soul the nutrients it needs to go out there, and when you don't, you're depleted and it's hungry and it kind of needs more. And so when I think about it like that. It reminds me to feed my soul. Just pause, feed my soul, yeah.
Speaker 3:Just pause. Feed your soul I love that. And when we don't feed our soul or we go, go go, that's when you know all the things that are our origin story the panic attacks, the issues, the problems, the stress, the back pain, like all of the things start to show up and, like you said, you could tell easily as soon as you started to have that pain in your foot. Oh, this is something you know, unrelated, I didn't do anything.
Speaker 4:I didn't do anything, exactly.
Speaker 3:Exactly.
Speaker 3:Yeah Well, I feel like I could talk to you for hours about this.
Speaker 3:We'll probably have to have a part two eventually, because this is so, so fascinating to me, because we are.
Speaker 3:We talk a lot about, like the Trinity, the mind, body, spirit, connection and yoga teachings, and then, as we pull it through class, and it also is, you know that buzzword, you know having we have this mind, it's our intelligence, it also is, you know that buzzword, you know, having we have this mind, it's our intelligence, it holds, you know this, you know wisdom inside of us for us to problem solve, and it was our survival.
Speaker 3:And then we have this vessel, like you're saying, and we need to have that yin yang balance, um, and we have this spirit, our spirit, which is infinite and it's it wants to feel happy and empowered and grow, and it came here for a reason and it's integrating and weaving all of that together is, you know, part of the everyday practice and everything you're saying about. You know, somatic and sound healing, and your journey is just truly a testament of what you've done to stay on top of that and even, especially with being a mom and everything you have going on and coming back to yourself and then exploring other things, such as Kabbalah and, you know, continuously learning, you know feeding your soul in that way too.
Speaker 3:It's just so, so inspiring. Just so much wisdom inside that you have. Yeah. I love it. I would love to hear Is there anything else you'd like to say or anything else closing for our listeners you'd like to bring up?
Speaker 4:Yeah, I mean, I guess I would just say, like, I do have a lot of tools in my kit, which we talked about, and so if there is anyone who's listening, who's out there who is in need of something and you don't know what it is yet, feel free to get in touch anytime because I can talk you through it. Whether it's talking movement spirituality, and whether it's with me or with someone else talking movement spirituality, and whether it's with me or with someone else, there's tons of resources to help yourself. So, yeah, please stay connected. I'm loosely on Instagram. I, in full disclosure, hate social media, so I'm a very bad poster.
Speaker 2:You can kind of find me there.
Speaker 4:I know I have it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, okay. What is your Instagram? Tell us about your web. We have you. We'll have your link to your practitioner page with all your info, but what is your Instagram? And then website.
Speaker 4:My Instagram is at skm, underscore wellness, and my website's the same, just skmwellnesscom.
Speaker 3:Yes, great, thank you Love it. No, no, I'm the same way about social media. I have it to have it, and I, you know, and you know it's we all have our thing that we love and enjoy, and that's part of the beauty of life, right, exactly?
Speaker 4:yeah, exactly, exactly no this is so fun. I always love talking to you too likewise, likewise.
Speaker 3:This is. This is amazing. I'm sure we'll have a part two to dig deeper into some other things. I would love to have you back on and walk us through a somatic practice that we can have on the podcast. Cool, Like a meditation or like a mind-body awareness thing. So we'll do that for a part two. So fun, I love that idea. Sounds great. Well, thank you for being here. Thank you everyone for listening and staying until the end. Everything's linked in the show notes and we appreciate all of your support. You can catch us on our website and then check out Sandra's page on our practitioner page. Thank you everyone. Have a great day. Bye, Bye.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much for joining us today on the Modern Zen Collective podcast. If this episode resonated with you, we'd love for you to share it with a friend and leave a review. It helps more conscious women like you find our community, and if you're craving a deeper connection to your practice, we've created something just for you the modern Zen collective app a sanctuary in your pocket. Inside you'll find guided meditations, soulful workshops, energy updates and intuitive channeling, all curated to support your spiritual and holistic wellness. Plus, for just three 99 a month, you'll receive timely push notifications with astrological insights and gentle reminders to realign with your highest self. It's rooted in ritual, made for modern life and always within reach. Just head to the App Store or Google Play and search Modern Zen Collective to download the app and begin your journey with us today. And, as always, any links or resources we mentioned in this episode can be found in the show notes. Until next time, keep trusting your path and honoring your unfolding.
