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The Relationship Blueprint: Unlock Your Power of Connection
Colleen is a student of Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt who created the Imago Theory and have brought this work to over 50 countries around the world. She is profoundly influenced by this belief shared by Dr. Harville Hendrix. He said, "We are born in relationship, wounded in relationship and healed in relationship."
What are you struggling with today? Colleen believes that almost any problem we have began with a broken or unhealed relationship. The anxiety or deep sadness we feel often began with unresolved issues in our relationships with our parents, partner, family or friends. When we have unmet needs we are programed to get those needs met. When we don't get what we need we protest by protecting ourselves. this often looks like defensive, critical, demanding behaviors. these behaviors are most often ineffective. As a result we may develop unhealthy relationship with food, sex, gambling our or a substance.
Colleen invites world renown relationship specialists from all over the world to help her guests explore their own relationships and see their problems through a relational lens. She will help us explore how to create intimacy to deepen our connections. Her listeners will gain insights to create a more joyful life.
Colleen is a Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of South Carolina, a certified, Advanced Imago Clinical therapist, a clinical instructor for the Imago International Trading Institute while maintaining her clinical practice in Hilton Head Island, South Carolina.
Thank you for joining Colleen today. Remember, don't let life happen to you. You can be the architect of your relationships. Join her next time on the Relationship Blueprint; Unlock Your Power of Connection.
Contact Colleen at colleen@hiltonheadislandcounseling.com for questions or to be a guest on the show!
The Relationship Blueprint: Unlock Your Power of Connection
Episode 10: Rekindling the Spark: Can we really ever get that back?
Unlock the secrets to a deeper, more fulfilling relationship with insights from Rebecca, a celebrated relationship expert and educator. Ever wondered why the initial spark in love fades over time? Join us as Rebecca unravels the mysteries behind why we often feel we’ve chosen the wrong partner, highlighting the chemical reactions and past experiences that drive our attractions. This episode is a must-listen for anyone grappling with the universal challenges of maintaining love across cultures and stages of commitment.
Discover how to transform your relationship into a thriving, intentional connection that stands the test of time. With Rebecca’s guidance, we explore the power of proactive nurturing and the importance of acquiring new relationship skills before issues become insurmountable. Just like mastering a new sport, keeping love vibrant requires effort, understanding, and a willingness to try new things together. Learn how to avoid the pitfalls of a stagnant relationship by infusing fun and thoughtfulness into your everyday life, preventing the dreaded parallel marriage and fostering lasting intimacy.
Conclude your journey with us by tapping into your personal power and self-discovery. Through Rebecca’s compelling metaphors and emphasis on empathy, gain the tools to navigate relational challenges with intention. Understand how recognizing each partner's strengths can create a healthier dynamic, and ultimately, a more connected and empowered life. Don't miss our next episode on personal growth and connection, where we continue to explore the pathways to a fulfilling life.
Thank you for joining me today on the Relationship Blueprint. Remember, don't let life happen to you. You can be the architect of your relationships. So join me next time on the Relationship Blueprint; Unlock Your Power of Connection.
Contact Colleen at colleen@hiltonheadislandcounseling.com for questions or to be a guest on the show!
Welcome to the Relationship Blueprint, unlocking your Power of Connection. After 40 years of working with individuals, couples and families, I have come to the conclusion that at the heart of most problems is a relationship that just isn't working. Join me in discovering why relationships fall apart, how to reconnect and how to build deeper and more meaningful connections. I will invite fascinating guests to help us explore your questions about relationships. Let's get started. Hey Rebecca, thanks for being here, and I want to spend a few minutes introducing you to our listeners. I took some notes because I didn't want to leave anything out about Rebecca. She has been a mentor to me, a clinical instructor and my dear friend. She is a senior faculty member and a clinical instructor for Imago International Training Institute and serves as a clinical professor at Daybreak University. Rebecca trains therapists in Washington DC, estonia, romania, the Netherlands and Russia, and I want to just ask you if there's anything I've left out that you want to tell our listeners about you.
Speaker 2:Oh, what such a good question. We don't usually start with that one, but I think that really covers. I just want to say, you know, doing this kind of relationship work, it really is applicable all over the world. Where I've been and I teach in some pretty unusual countries, people would say why Romania Where's Estonia? Are people different in Russia? And while everybody has their own cultural flavor, everybody has the same relationship issues in all of those countries that we do here in the US, and that's something I really love about doing relationship work.
Speaker 1:Something I really love about doing relationship work. Well, you know, rebecca, it strikes me too that same observation. I have not taught in all those places, but being on the faculty with people from all over the world and when we're talking about cases and realizing just how global it is for us to have this question in our minds, like my God, I don't think I'm in love anymore. He gets on my every nerve. I don't know what to do. Maybe we shouldn't be married, but I can't leave because I do love him. I'm just not. I'm not in love anymore. And can you talk to our audience a little bit about that common issue?
Speaker 2:Yes, because that is part of what I would say. Everybody feels, everybody wants that wonderful in-love feeling, everyone wants to keep it, and everyone that I have met is so discouraged and so despondent and so reactive and that is universal. And you know one thing that we've worked with a lot in our work and I think it's important working with couples is actually having the information about well, where does attraction come from? Why do I get attracted to somebody like you but not somebody like you? I love?
Speaker 1:that question. So, tell us what your theory is about that?
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, I can. Certainly, you know. Thank many, many wise people, including Dr Hendricks' before us. But what we know about attraction is, first of all, you can't make it happen. It's like a chemical reaction.
Speaker 1:So are you saying like I am at a party and my friend says I want you to meet Jim and he's perfect for you, and she lists all the things that are perfect, right, and on paper Jim looks like my guy, right? Yes, and then I meet Jim. He was really nice. I thought he was nice guy. He's a really nice guy.
Speaker 2:Nice guy, but do I want a blind date with him?
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, and then, and then there's somebody else across the room that I'm immediately looking at and connected to. You get the butterflies and the butterflies.
Speaker 2:You get the butterflies, yeah, right, but this is so interesting because, you know, so many couples feel like, well, I've chosen the wrong person, that's right, I've chosen the wrong person. When it's difficult yeah, but in some ways you can't choose the right person because there was an original attraction. What causes that? You know maybe a lot of things, but what we know in the research and what we know in our clinical practices is that you actually have an unconscious attraction to someone who's familiar, and someone who's familiar in a way that feels like love. And you know, our parents first loved us, our grandparents first loved us, and so we're going to be attracted to something that's familiar that way, and we're also going to be attracted to getting more love in a way that we didn't get enough of love. Did I say?
Speaker 1:that you did. So let me like make sure I've got it. Yeah, so what you're saying is that love sort of happens to us yes, we can't make ourselves love or the attraction happens to us, we can't make ourselves love. Jim, attraction, attraction, the attraction. So I can't make myself attracted to Jim, as nice as he is, because I don't have the butterflies, I don't have the internal guidance to go towards Jim. And then you're saying that somewhere along the line, when it's not going well, we have this feeling that we've chosen the wrong person. Yep, and then we really don't know what to do about it. And sometimes we don't have big reactions like, oh my God, I've chosen the wrong person, but sometimes those little reactions that like a steady kind of like a steady deadening of our connection Did I get?
Speaker 2:you Absolutely. And you know and we could go into more detail that usually for most couples and the research will show that kind of loss of that excitement, yeah, you can keep that excitement anywhere from maybe a couple months to maybe a year and a half. That kind of excitement. We think about relationships happening in stages and when you go from this infatuation, excitement stage to the next one and often that's after somebody has been dating for a long time, somebody gets married and the commitment gets closer, Move in together, having to deal with the real issues of life now, and what starts to happen is and we all, this has happened to us, it's happened to everyone listening to us you start to have a little disappointment and this feeling of feeling so connected, that feeling of being so connected, starts to change and we actually pull our energy into ourselves and we start to feel disconnected. Yeah, and this looks very different and very similar with couples, For example and I won't make this too long, but you know there are some people, when they start to feel disappointed in their relationship, we'll start to like where'd you go?
Speaker 2:Can we do this? Let's do more? Come on, why not? And they kind of pursue with their energy to try to make more happen. And then there's some people when they start to feel disappointed, they kind of pull that energy in and maybe they work harder, or they don't want to bring it up because they don't want to cause a problem.
Speaker 1:I think that's always so. Interesting too is that both people, whether you're pushing or pulling, are really trying to protect the relationship, and it doesn't look like it on the outside, for sure.
Speaker 2:It does not look like it wrong person because we've pulled our energy into our anxiety, our disappointment, our hurt that we were using for this great connection and we start to tell ourselves I've married the wrong person, You've changed. You used to want to do all this with me.
Speaker 1:You know, rebecca, what you're making me think of, and I think it was in my first clinical training that I heard you or someone teach that like this. So this unconscious attraction, so say even their laugh. We think they're so funny, they just have the best sense of humor. And you know, 18 months later we're like hold that joke 3,000 times.
Speaker 1:You know, it's not that we haven't heard the joke in the beginning, but it's almost like our mind in this romantic love phase doesn't see anything that's negative. And what happens with that right is that of course you love me, because I'm praising you, I'm telling you how great you make me feel. It's a can't eat, can't sleep, have sex all the time, feeling so everything is great. And then, as you're describing it, it's like then, when that natural 18 months or so passes and um, some of my chemicals that I was creating in my body when I had that excitement and love, they're gone. And then I am left with my disappointment and I wonder why can't you be like you were? But I never asked why can't I be like I was? Absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 2:All of that, you know this is so. It's so important for our listeners to understand this, because what you're saying and we can say it even more all of these characteristics that attracted us in the beginning will start to annoy us. Not all of them, but a lot of them, right, and now there's a lot behind that. We could probably do a whole nother show on what that is. But if you find that, you know that, let's say that man who was so steadfast and worked so hard and such a strong intellectual thinker, and all of a sudden you start he's a little boring. Can he have more fun? Can't he initiate something kind of playful and interesting and, you know, exciting? If that has ever happened to you.
Speaker 2:You are in the right relationship, but couples start to feel so like, oh gosh, everybody else is so happy, and now I've married the wrong person and you've changed. And again, like you said, I don't know, maybe that I have and all of that potential is still there, right, but it's so discouraging when you think you've married the wrong person. You think the other person has changed and you don't know where that wonderful, exciting chemical infatuation feeling went. And now we're having conflict. And if we're not having conflict. Maybe we're having kind of boring, no energy between us because nobody's bringing anything up.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but, we're just not having fun.
Speaker 1:And the intimacy just sort of it starts to go away.
Speaker 2:It starts to go away, and you know, and I think what we want couples to know is this is a very normal dynamic. Yeah, and you know, and I think what we want couples to know is this is a very normal dynamic. Yeah, and even if everybody else looks like, oh my gosh, they're in such a happy, happy relationship, we. This goes on in all relationships to a certain degree. First of all, it's very normal. You didn't cause it, your partner didn't cause it.
Speaker 1:You didn't cause it. Your partner didn't cause it. The relational history between you and something new trying to grow is normal, very normal, and that, instead of hiding from it or having the same fight about it over and over again, which I think people just tend to give up. If you try a thousand different things, if you're trying to do everything, you know how to do. You've asked them to stop doing this thing. You've asked them to do more of the other thing. You've tried not talking about it. You've tried fighting about it. You've asked them to do more of the other thing. You've tried not talking about it. You've tried fighting about it. You've criticized about it. You've demanded. You've shamed him.
Speaker 2:Actually, what you've been doing is when, at that point, you're trying to get your partner to be like you.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes, because if he could only think like me, we'd be happy.
Speaker 2:Yes, because if he could only think like me, we'd be happy. Could you fix him? That's the kind of the sense that when couples come in, can you fix him Because I think I'm just fine and you know what. The balance and the differences were so sexy and passionate and appealing at the beginning and now they feel so like I don't know if we can get through this. Yeah, we have to get divorced, we have to break up. I'm going to go find somebody else, and what we've seen over and over in relationships. You can do that, but you know what? Then the cycle will happen again with the next relationship.
Speaker 1:You're so right, and I'd love to give a personal example. Oh, please, I'm sure we have several. Well, we do. We do Because we know each other. We know about her because she didn't have a high school degree and she lied and said she had a college degree and got an amazing job so that she could raise a little girl by herself. So that's all celebration, right.
Speaker 1:But my mom also was not a. In that case it was a great risk, but in many ways she was not a good risk taker. She was not a safe risk taker. She didn't make up measured decisions, she was very impulsive, and so I grew up thinking I'm not taking any risks, I don't want risks, you know. And then I'm an adult woman. I marry an entrepreneur, not once, but twice, because it's this what you were saying in the very beginning of our session. It's this part of me that was so scared about risk-taking. And it wasn't until Kevin and I were able to do our own Imago work and really have dialogues about how I felt. Like, say, he said I want to open up an office in Charleston. My immediate answer, before a mock-up, was no, no, it's too much risk. And what do you think he heard?
Speaker 2:right, absolutely. We know what he heard.
Speaker 1:The critic that he grew up with. So until we were able to dig under that and figure it out, it was a constant push-pull, power struggle right and then with how well, really just with the dialogue, he was able to hear how frightening it was for me and how if I didn't understand all of the pieces of the wrist, I couldn't be all in. And once we did that, it was amazing and I've learned to be a risk taker. I wouldn't be doing this podcast if it weren't for Kevin. I believe that I learned that risks were okay as long as you take a measured risk and you think it through, and that is exactly what you're pointing out. For us, Rebecca, is that unconscious needs and desires and wounds come up in the intimate relationship. We don't see them in the beginning and then, when they do, they pulled us apart.
Speaker 2:What a great summary and what a great example of you and Kevin, and you know our listeners. It's not that you don't want that to happen. Like all of this makes sense Well, maybe not all of it, but it starts to sound familiar and make sense. And couples want that feeling back. They want that fun experience back, and it's just they don't know how to do it Like the beautiful and touching example with you and your mom. She didn't teach you how to do this.
Speaker 2:While my parents had, for their age, a good enough marriage, they also kind of had a parallel life and I didn't really see them overcome differences. My dad kind of did his thing, my mom kind of did her thing and they kind of took care of the family, but they always went and did their own thing. And you know we want to help our couples have the excitement together and they say, well, yeah, we've tried everything. Well, actually we can't try something that we haven't seen to model. And most couples need help about what to do next, Because our brains and this is a whole nother talk that we need to have you know our brains do what used to work, yeah, and our brain doesn't know how, all alone, to create some new, novel experience, especially if it was associated with something protective.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Like our conflict style is so clearly developed. In our childhood, my mother yelled a lot, and so I made it like a promise to myself I'm not a yeller. What I didn't know, rebecca, was that my silence was just as damaging, just as painful oh, I don't know if it's more but as painful as the yelling and screaming. So until you can learn some of these things about yourself and about those early behaviors, this is ineffective. I love the question is it effective? Is it working? And if not, what if I try something new? What if I do? But it's harder. And and what are the hard ones to try? Yeah, I will have my.
Speaker 2:You know, try and I feel like this is, this is a gift of really good relationship work, because we can help you try some new things. And trying something new people don't realize it's hard, it feels, feels awkward, it feels like going to my first Zumba class and I'm the only one who doesn't know how to move my feet. It's hard and somewhere in our thinking we had this you know, storybook feeling that love should be easy and love should always feel like riding off into the sunset and love should feel like you should know and I should never have to tell you and no one tells us. Love kind of moves, whether we use the word love or infatuation kind of moves, whether we use the word love or infatuation, love is really an intentional action that helps us stay passionately connected and it takes work, it takes intentionality and that's not easy.
Speaker 1:So also what you're saying is so important about how love sort of happens to us initially, attraction, attraction. I keep saying love, attraction. We say that we feel like it's love and that attraction is so powerful and then we know that after a certain amount of time moving in together, getting married, having children, a long-term relationship, eventually that we're going to enter this power struggle and the power struggle as you described with your parents. Sometimes it looks like that it's not really a big fight and no one's talking about divorce. Big fight and no one's talking about divorce. It is this parallel marriage where, you know, there's the intimacy that they both might crave maybe they've given up on and then there's also the bigger, the ones that look worse, maybe the big fights and the unthreatening divorce and all of that wounding.
Speaker 1:So we have a combination and that's why I guess what I have found with my friends family, not really the clients is that people think the only reason they would need relationship therapy or parent coaching would be because they're really like the hat added or they're ready to like go to the lawyer. And what I just told a client today? I said, you know, if you were, he wanted some help with parenting and I said well, you know, if you were learning to play golf, wouldn't you hire a golf coach, or would you just go out there and whack the ball. And you know that made sense to him.
Speaker 2:Absolutely.
Speaker 1:And it's like just a skill you can learn. It's not like something's wrong with you, it's a skill you can learn.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and you know what I like about what you're saying. A lot of couples think I don't need it until I need it. So bad, as opposed to what you're saying. How do we keep helping a couple be intentional? How do we actually think about nurturing our relationship and keeping our relationship nurtured, keeping it fun, keeping it safe before it starts to not feel fun and safe? Yes, because it happens for some so quickly and so unconsciously it's like you almost wake up one day I've married the wrong person. I want out, and we really want to help you do and maximize what you know how to do, because you were doing it and now you have to move into being intentional to make it happen.
Speaker 2:Yes, you know, play together, say great things together, doesn't mean you have to do everything together. But how are we keeping it exciting? New, I mean we read this in magazines now Go do something new. Yes, new I mean we read this in magazines now Go do something new. Yes, and it's really helpful for our couples to know why, to actually use their brains. Okay, we can go do something new, but you're still boring or I'm still criticizing you. So we actually need to bring our thoughtful selves into why we're doing this and you know we want to help couples be conscious and not just automatic. I feel it or I don't. Yeah, and it doesn't take much. I mean, you and I both know we've been working with couples for years. It does not take much adjustment to get that energy and that intentionality playing and having fun in the space again.
Speaker 1:Well, what is so fun about what you're saying which is why I think we both love our work so much is, you know, when you see a couple coming in and they are having a hard time, and even if it is I'm thinking of a couple right now who are wonderful and make it along great, but having children. They're trying so hard to do the best job with their children, but they also are struggling because they see how to do that differently and then, when they don't, their partner doesn't do it the way they want them to. There's another disconnection, absolutely, and it's not unusual, right? I mean it's not unusual. You grew up this way and this is the way your parents parented or how you've reacted to parenting, but you have these two loving people who are really it's hurting their marriage and they need to figure out a way through that. So it's another example of how you don't have to be in crisis to sort of rethink your relationship Absolutely.
Speaker 2:And as you're saying that, coco, what comes up is helping a couple see and honor the benefit of their differences yes, you know, like there's usually one more strict parent, yeah, and one who's a lot more lackadaisical or hands-off and actually help them see the benefit to both. And if they can see the benefit and appreciate the benefit of these differences, usually there's a better connection and dynamic and better parenting. But this is in all parts, but definitely in parenting.
Speaker 1:Yes, and what? I wonder about that too, as you were talking about our differences. How many times do you hear in your office? We're just so different, like I. I I'm such a communicator and I want to talk all the time and my husband doesn't talk to me and I want him to talk to me. And as she's telling me this, she's like loud and and demanding and criticizing him and I'm like, well, let's figure out how he likes to hear you. That's right, I mean, what a thought. But if you don't, if you're not having that sort of support, you wouldn't know that. You're just what I tell the. We call them the octopus and the turtle, and so the octopus is like up here going. We never go anywhere, you don't want to be with me, you're always at work, and the turtle's got his little head hidden in the shell, not wanting to come out. And then the turtle does come out eventually and snaps off the octopus's hand.
Speaker 2:What we start to do, when we don't understand and appreciate and empathize with each other's differences, that we start to do this octopus and turtle thing. And we have a saying in our work it's what you do to try to protect yourself and get safe that actually scares the other person.
Speaker 1:Our protective behaviors are right. They're so. You know shutting down, lashing out, screaming. You know all the different ways we run away. I mean, there's hundreds of ways that people cope with their anxiety about it, their frustrations, their unmet needs. You know that they're not able to get what they need and they really, really know they had it with their partner initially. So why can't you give it to me now?
Speaker 2:Yeah absolutely.
Speaker 1:They misunderstand that first part, which is all about I didn't see anything negative in the beginning. You didn't used to be like that, Coco, and you used to never yell at me and you used to always think of fun things to do with me. Now you play golf on the weekends, you watch a lot of sports and if we go out to dinner sometimes you're on your phone, you're on your phone and I just feel so lonely. So if what if we don't say it like that? Instead we're saying you're always watching football, you never come home from work on time. I'm so sick of it I can't even do this anymore.
Speaker 2:Like the other person feels what it feels painful and if I'm doing that with good intentions, to try to get us connected. I'm feeling pain, though, and you'll say to me but you shouldn't, that's you know. Or if I'm working really, really hard, trying to earn money for the family, trying to get things together at work or trying to have a little downtime, you know, I'm trying to do that so we can have a good relationship, but you're criticizing me for staying at work. Painful both ways, yes. Painful both ways, yes, and it's so normal, but it's very hard to get out of that rut because both people actually have good intentions. So what happens is you do more of that behavior. Yeah, I try harder to pull you out and you may try harder to avoid the conflict so it doesn't get worse, exactly, and it's so discouraging.
Speaker 1:We're not spending time together because we really don't know what to do about the thing and it's not typically, it's not an intentional wound, but that is. You talked about the word impact, that I may have the best intentions, but what is my impact and know if my intentions are happening? Because if I really want you to listen to me and you're not listening to me, instead of looking at you and saying you're not listening, right, I can like ask myself huh, I wonder what I can look at in myself so that he knows my intentions and how much I want him to hear me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah much. I want them to hear me. Yeah, yeah. And, as you're saying that too, I think another and I'm so grateful for this another benefit of the way that we do couples work, family work with a go is really paying attention to the relational space, and a lot of our life is like that. I feel this and and like that's the ultimate thing. I feel this, you feel that as a house relationship feeling yeah, well, you know, I don't want to do that. That's not comfortable. Yeah, okay, tell me more about that. I want to, to understand that. But for us, as you're saying, to think about what is the impact, not just on me, what's the impact on our relationship? If I feel hurt, if I feel disregarded? Okay, that's a real feeling. Do I have a right to say that? Of course I have a right, but the way I say it, we want to help couples think the way I say that or don't say it, am I improving or making it worse in our relationship.
Speaker 1:You're talking about this space. So right now we have space between us, this energy, more pouring energy. I feel I'm not saying you are, but I feel that I'm space between, almost like a metaphor of a baby. So what would you do to take care of a baby? Naturally, we all know you feed it, you love it, you nourish it, you spend time with it, you give gentle redirection, you celebrate mistakes, you laugh at their silliness and what they do wrong.
Speaker 1:And that all happens when people are really intentional, as you're saying, about what that space is between them and think about what we often do. Not because we're bad people. But how many times do we take the shortcuts? Like I can say anything to you because you're going to get over it, I'm just dumping on you, but I go into the grocery store and I say, oh, thank you so much, you were so helpful. And then the next minute, so, anyway, you know, we're nicer sometimes to strangers than we are to our partners. Oh, it's so much easier, isn't it so much easier? But I do think that we take a lot of shortcuts because we're all so busy and we all have things to do, but what we don't realize is that I feel like broken marriages die not because of the big things, but because of the thousand little cuts that happen along the way and unintentional, unintentionally.
Speaker 2:Unintentionally.
Speaker 1:So I love everything we've talked about today. Will you come back and help us with the what to do next? Because the next question they have to is what do we do now? Like, okay, we've gotten a snippet of what this is about and I want some practical things to go home and do with my partner, and we would like to give you that. We would like to come back again and give you some practical tips about what you might begin to do, to think about changing your ship around.
Speaker 1:I love to tell people that you know, if we're sailing not that I've ever done this around the world, we need coordinates so that we don't end up in South America Good way to put it. You know we're really heading to Europe. We don't want to end up south. Those coordinates and that intention and the tools to get there how does anybody really do it? And I want you to hear that relationships are all about understanding and then skill building. Absolutely, absolutely. Once we understand the why, then we can go oh, this is why I don't take risks and this is why I judge him for it. Oh, okay, so now what's the what after that? Now I know it's my issue. I can't keep blaming him, I can begin to look at what makes me so scared and ask for what I need, and he can know that it's not criticizing him and gets to say, oh my gosh, she must be so scared. She's not judging me, she just needs more information. And that's sort of how we can massage that change in that power struggle.
Speaker 1:So, rebecca, I so appreciate you being with me today. You will come back, I promise. I promise. Thank you to Rebecca Sears, dr Rebecca Sears, for her brilliant work, brilliant teaching and a brilliant friend. So we're going to sign off today and we say welcome back to the Blueprint next week, unlocking your power of you connection. I want you to unlock that power so that you can going to have the best life that you can possibly have, and that power really is within you. It's not within your partner, although they have to do their part. I want you to think about your power and how you can find that. So have a great day and we'll see you soon Signing off.
