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The Relationship Blueprint: Unlock Your Power of Connection
Colleen is a student of Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt who created the Imago Theory and have brought this work to over 50 countries around the world. She is profoundly influenced by this belief shared by Dr. Harville Hendrix. He said, "We are born in relationship, wounded in relationship and healed in relationship."
What are you struggling with today? Colleen believes that almost any problem we have began with a broken or unhealed relationship. The anxiety or deep sadness we feel often began with unresolved issues in our relationships with our parents, partner, family or friends. When we have unmet needs we are programed to get those needs met. When we don't get what we need we protest by protecting ourselves. this often looks like defensive, critical, demanding behaviors. these behaviors are most often ineffective. As a result we may develop unhealthy relationship with food, sex, gambling our or a substance.
Colleen invites world renown relationship specialists from all over the world to help her guests explore their own relationships and see their problems through a relational lens. She will help us explore how to create intimacy to deepen our connections. Her listeners will gain insights to create a more joyful life.
Colleen is a Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of South Carolina, a certified, Advanced Imago Clinical therapist, a clinical instructor for the Imago International Trading Institute while maintaining her clinical practice in Hilton Head Island, South Carolina.
Thank you for joining Colleen today. Remember, don't let life happen to you. You can be the architect of your relationships. Join her next time on the Relationship Blueprint; Unlock Your Power of Connection.
Contact Colleen at colleen@hiltonheadislandcounseling.com for questions or to be a guest on the show!
The Relationship Blueprint: Unlock Your Power of Connection
Unlocking the Power of Love: Transformative Relationship Insights with Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt
This podcast episode explores the complexities of love and relationships, focusing on lifelong intimacy rather than one-day celebrations. Equipped with practical advice from Dr. Harville Hendricks and Dr. Helen LaKelley Hunt, listeners learn how to cultivate lasting love through communication, removing negativity, and celebrating shared experiences.
• Discussing the deeper meaning of Valentine’s Day in long-term relationships
• The significance of managing expectations in love
• The importance of a zero negativity approach to sustain intimacy
• Transforming negative interactions into healing dialogues
• The role of childhood experiences in shaping relationship dynamics
• Practical strategies for creating daily joy and connection in love
• Emphasizing the value of listening in fostering emotional safety
The call to action invites listeners to check out upcoming workshops and resources available on their website, where they can learn more about Imago Therapy and how to apply these principles in their lives.
Thank you for joining me today on the Relationship Blueprint. Remember, don't let life happen to you. You can be the architect of your relationships. So join me next time on the Relationship Blueprint; Unlock Your Power of Connection.
Contact Colleen at colleen@hiltonheadislandcounseling.com for questions or to be a guest on the show!
Welcome back everyone. Today we have the Valentine's episode and I'm really excited about the guests that are coming here to talk to us, not about how to do this for one day, but how do we do this thing called love for a lifetime. How do we reignite sparks with our partner, especially when we've been in a relationship for a long time? Sparks with our partner, especially when we've been in relationship for a long time? How do we break some of the patterns that we have in our relationship that keep us from real intimacy? We have two of the most influential people in modern psychology. They are here and they are revolutionizing couples therapy.
Speaker 1:Before I introduce our esteemed guest, I want to invite you to sit down with a cup of coffee or your favorite beverage and invite your partner or a friend, or sit by yourself and just listen to these two amazing people. Let them help us think about Valentine's Day as not just a day, but a time to really reflect. How do I show my love? Am I showing my love? Am I receiving the love that I really want? What's getting in the way of us staying connected?
Speaker 1:Hi, everybody, and as I promised, we have our esteemed guest with us today. It's an honor to introduce these two visionaries. Their work has transformed the way we understand love, connection and healing in relationships. Dr Harville Hendricks, a clinical psychologist and couples therapist, is the co-creator of Omago Relationship Therapy and the best-selling author of Getting the Love you Want, a book that has revolutionized how couples approach communication and conflict. He has dedicated his life to helping people turn relationship struggles into opportunities for deeper connections. Alongside him is his brilliant partner in life and in work, helen Lakelly Hunt, a distinguished author, philanthropist and an advocate for women's empowerment. Ellen has not only played a pivotal role in shaping Imago Therapy, but has also made a significant contribution to the women's rights movement, as recognized by her induction into the National Women's Hall of Fame.
Speaker 1:I call women's philanthropy my head work, my heart work is dialogue, yeah, and so the work that you do with philanthropy is very important, but that's in your head, and what you've done with Harville is in your heart. Well, together, they have spent decades exploring the deeper dynamics of love, teaching couples how to heal their past wounds and build conscious, thriving relationships. Their insights have touched millions of lives, mine included, making them two of the most influential voices in modern relationship psychology. So please join me in welcoming Dr Harville Hendricks and Dr Helen LaKelley Hunt. Thank you for being here. When I did an introduction about Valentine's Day, I was thinking about all the ways that people show love on this day, and if you go to Walgreens or anywhere, there are people frantically buying cards and spending money and making expensive dinner reservations and trying to fill it all up in one day. What I wanted to know from you is how do you two celebrate your day?
Speaker 2:Oh, you know what? I can't believe you've asked that question. I left Harville a note. Harville, when you're free, I want to talk to you, and what I wanted to talk to you about was you don't need to do anything for me for Valentine's Day. Why don't we just watch a romance movie, a?
Speaker 3:Valentine's Day yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, before we go to bed, that'll be our Valentine's.
Speaker 3:All right.
Speaker 1:I love what they just did. They did like a relational contract right there. So everybody knows the expectations on the front end, and that's something we help our couples learn. Right is how to manage our expectations and get clear about what we want and need.
Speaker 3:But the point that you made about the process is that we talk about it so we know what the expectations are. Like my natural inclination is going to be to send you flowers or to write you a poem or get a card. Find you something.
Speaker 2:I just had a birthday and he wrote me a beautiful. He writes little poems.
Speaker 1:Poetry too. That's beautiful, Helen.
Speaker 3:But she makes it clear that she doesn't need anything or want anything, except an experience which is watching a Valentine's Day love story. So now you know, the whole thing on me is off. I don't have to think well, a dozen flowers or two dozen or whatever Takes all that off words or two dozen or whatever Takes all that off.
Speaker 2:One thing we do in our workshops is we remind people about LL, a loving look, dt voice tone. It tells me my voice tone when I get horrible, got to do this horrible, then my voice tone really is horrible, and then sometimes Harville sort of goes at me. So we tell people in our workshop just say PT or a voice tone or LL for loving look.
Speaker 3:Yeah, just interrupt any negative energy input because that spoils Valentine's Day. Any negative energy, even one microsecond, because our brains are primed to hear the negative, because it has to do with survival. If you hear something negative, the brain doesn't say, oh well, he's having a bad day. The brain says this could be bad. Yes, the brain says you've got to survive. If he's got a tone in his voice, it could be that he's angry. Anger might lead to violence, violence might lead to my death. So the brain goes catastrophic with every negative piece of energy. So the way to keep the relationship safe and Valentine's Day all day is to keep it free from negativity all the time, every day. And people say, well, we can't do that and we have to come back and say, well, then give up wanting a happy Valentine's Day or a great marriage, because negativity and great marriages don't go together.
Speaker 1:Isn't it so funny how we think we can punish our partner into behaving the way we want them to right? I can yell at you and you know, scream at you and give you the VT and all of that the voice tone, and then expect like, oh, now he's going to get it, now she'll get it. It's just a wild thing that we do. But just watching you two just now reminds me of when you said a loving look, helen. You looked at Harville with such love about his poems. And I'm thinking about all those bids that we have for connection that are nonverbal and how, when Harville started talking about a dozen flower, dozen roses or whatever your head, your nonverbals were like no, no, no, that's not. You know, it's not really what I want. I told you what I want. But I can imagine for couples out there if he's getting the pressure, thinking he's got to provide X when she really wants Y. That's a kind of a Valentine's spoiler. Right there, right, and not because anybody meant to, and that's why it's good to ask what would you like?
Speaker 2:I just turned 77 and I said Marvel, I want a two paragraph poem. He writes odes poems, just two paragraphs. But just say two things that you appreciate about being married to me and it's perfect.
Speaker 1:Happy birthday, by the way. Happy birthday, you're a February girl, me too.
Speaker 3:Yeah, oh.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it is too. Yeah, we're both February 1st and February 13th A lot of so happy birthday. You two have been married how long now.
Speaker 3:I think it's 42 years. 42 years, I proposed.
Speaker 1:I like that, helen. I was just saying that the other day. Isn't it a sad thing that in today's world that women have to wait to be chosen? And you didn't wait, you chose him. How do couples keep the spark alive? Here they are. Many people are sitting around today thinking about tomorrow, thinking about, maybe, what their first Valentine's Days were like, and what do you tell couples about? What can they do to just reignite the flame?
Speaker 2:You know what? That's where I think they should tell each other. I think they are the ones to figure it out.
Speaker 1:So you think it's really between the couple what they need to do. They need to talk it out. So you think it's really between the couple what they need to do. They need to talk about it, they need to dialogue to figure it out, but my dream come true would be da-da-da.
Speaker 3:So that idea of keeping it between them, because one person's dream or one person's solution isn't the same for the other, what I'd like to add is again having to do with what we just said about negativity, that keeping the dream alive requires the removement of negativity. That is, you can't have emotional, romantic, sexual spark with negative energy. Negative energy triggers a different neurochemical in your body, the neurochemical of fear. You can't have an attraction towards someone who your brain has said that's a scary and dangerous person. To keep it positive, to add and maintain in the relationship, not occasionally but chronically one fundamental thing that couples haven't done and the human race hasn't done, and that is to listen when other people are talking. And you say, well, that's kind of simple. Well, it's not. Hardly anybody listens when their partner's talking or other people are talking.
Speaker 3:And what I mean by that? I make a distinction between hearing and listening. They may hear the acoustical sounds, but they don't allow them to penetrate into the memory system itself. So that the distinction that Helen is now being herself and sending me part of herself in her words and in her looks and gestures that are her, and they're different from perhaps my fantasy of her or my wish that she would be a certain way or say a certain thing Her reality is showing up in her languaging herself to me and most of us and human beings for all of history have listened or heard in order to object, to counter, to compete, to annihilate, to you know, just to establish that you're not right, your world is not the world, my world is the world. And so that annihilation happens so suddenly and so normally between most couples, all the time, not even knowing it. It's an awareness level that they're putting the other one down.
Speaker 3:So we say to couples in our workshops and whenever we get a chance, when we get ready to train them in the dialogue process which is talking and listening talking without judgment, listening without criticism, connecting without difference we say to them we're going to this exercise, which is the first one you're going to do, so start on Friday evening. First evening is the hardest thing anybody's ever asked you to do, and that's to listen to your partner without running a narrative in your own mind about what your partner is saying. Just go quiet inside and let your partner come into your mind in her full objective otherness, not judge it, comment on it, change it or anything, just accept it, receive it and then say thank you for sharing yourself with me. That is the most romantic thing you can actually do, because now when I do that, helen's brain goes into I'm safe here. Now her neurochemistry of endorphins and dopamine gets triggered by her brain and then she wants to be with me and then we'll have fun together.
Speaker 3:We might play together, we might make love together because it's safe. And when we say it's safe means I don't have to be defended, my brain doesn't have to have its little armory up and running to see if there are any enemies coming after me so I can relax and play. And that's where romantic experiences and emotional, positive emotional experiences happen, and they don't happen without that environment. Everything else is transaction.
Speaker 2:Could I add to this? Webster Dictionary used to have a word in it that they took out and the word was S-O-E-L-L-Y solely. And then suddenly it changed and it became two words. And they became two words silly and holy. And we tell our people if you want to be more holy, be more silly. And it's really hard to be conflicted when you're having fun.
Speaker 1:Absolutely. And what you're reminding me of when you talk about that safety, the silliness, the fun, when I asked you the question about how do we reignite it, If we remember in the very beginning, that's what it was like no defenses, stay up all night and talk, and there's a lot of sex, You're not guarded and what you're saying is to ever find that again or reignite that. We need to create that safety with each other and that negativity. I know when I roll my eyes at Kevin, right, I mean it's not anything I'm proud of, right, but I know when I've done it and how it's hurtful. You know showing that sort of contempt and even though I haven't said anything, I'm innocent, right, I'm innocent, I have no word. You know that it's very hurtful, but that negativity. We have to get really self-aware, don't we, in order to avoid the negativity.
Speaker 3:We have to, and it's hard to get self-aware and regulate it because our brains have been there's a thing called negativity bias that our brains have been programmed, trained and shaped over thousands and thousands of years to look for the negative, because the brain is interested only in survival. So it has to see are there any enemies out there? So until there is a period of time where there are no negatives, the brain is not going to go and relax. It's going to be on alert. So the brain has to have enough peaceful days, peaceful times and enough.
Speaker 3:I think the other thing we talk about with couples is enough memories in which we're safe and joyful to say okay, I'm now anticipating, because the brain is an anticipatory organ, I'm now anticipating that when I go to our apartment next door that Helen's going to, no matter what, you're going to send a positive message and I can anticipate that. But if we've had bad times, then my brain's going to anticipate I'm going to get a negative message. So you really have to have also a history of positive memories in the forefront of the brain in order to really feel safe enough with the partner to relax and play and then be romantic in whatever way you want to be.
Speaker 2:And you know what I really appreciate. You just did a few minutes ago I think you said when I roll my eyes in a negative way, it just really hurts him. It might be good for the two of you to sit down and list three things you think you do that bothers the other, and then both of you create seven things that you both would like to.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so you'd be getting really specific. So sitting down with your partner and saying you know what are the three things I really do that drive you crazy or hurt you, and then what are the seven things you really need from me that I don't give you enough of, and that that could be like a little menu for Valentine's Day versus cards or other things that have a meaningful chance of working day by day. I love that, helen, thank you.
Speaker 2:You get to get and co-create five to seven things that you both would love. That would be give to a positive relationship.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because, harville, you just talked about, you know, having this memory bank of, if we have a memory bank of these good memories, and I know that I've learned from your teaching that if I can re-romanticize my relationship, you know, this Valentine's Day by talking about some of those, even if they were flops, really, the time that we ordered pizza at the beach and the cheese was all over the sand but the memory is fun, right, the memory was, you know how hard we tried to make it romantic. And that's another thing that couples can do is tap into those happier times, because I think you didn't say this, harville, but when we're not having a lot of happy memories in our relationship, there really isn't that anchor to hang on to.
Speaker 3:Right, there is a paradoxically. It's really interesting that doing the positive recall increases the sense of safety, but it's the same thing with negative memories. To recall them, the brain recreates what we remember. Yes, we bring the past into the present, it's in the present. So those negative memories remember that time when you yelled at me and that didn't work well and blah, blah, and you were late. Well, my brain is now bringing up those things and the neurochemistry of cortisol that goes with that which activates the fear response. So we say to couples clearly you have to do two things One, recall the positive memories. And two, along with that subcategory, create new positive memories. Try to create new positive memories every day. And three, do not recite to each other negative memories because it will bring them back into the present and now your brain is living in the past. So if you want to have the safety and the neurochemistry of dopamine and endorphins, you've got to stay in pleasant memories and pleasant interactions.
Speaker 2:Yes, Because I remember, as Harwell would say this what you focus on is what you get. I want to remind you. Yes, Absolutely.
Speaker 1:It is so true. It's very hard when we have these problem-solving brains to not dwell on the negative, the negativity bias, and we have to really be conscious and kind of do the counterintuitive thing, which is I'm not going to bring that up and I do. It goes back to what we started with. Back to what we started with with. How do I think that by telling you about all the things in the past you've done wrong, that that's going to suddenly make you be kind to me or loving, and it is just something that people do Now. You two developed a zero negativity calendar. When I think about this and when I have a couple who's really locked up into like a lot of negative patterns in their relationship, I always recommend what you two have developed. Would you tell our listeners more about the zero negativity, the how to do?
Speaker 2:it Actually I think it was my idea. I went to the drugstore and I've just come back with a calendar and every night let's put a little checkmark if we went to bed feeling connected and put an X if we feel distant, no matter what problem we had had during the day that we went to bed connected.
Speaker 3:I can't help but point out that you took the odd day. I know and I took even.
Speaker 1:Mind being odd. Really, I was thinking about how necessity is the mother of invention with the zero negativity calendar and how creative it was, but it certainly does break the pattern when we start to get really conscious Now. Did you also develop something where you would say, ouch?
Speaker 2:Yeah an ouch, but then also the big one is to convert a frustration into a request as a partner. There was something that happened yesterday. May I have an appointment to tell you about something that happened and how I felt about it and what I want. Helen, I'm really really, really busy about 4.30 this afternoon and we make an appointment and we call it. Convert a frustration into a request. Harville, there was an ouch about so-and-so, but I wish you would have done da-da-da-da-da. Tell your partner what you'd like.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I love that Turning every complaint into a wish, like it's a wish in disguise, right? I'm sure that it's one of your brilliant statements.
Speaker 2:Maybe, maybe Harville goes well. I can't do that a hundred percent. How about so-and-so, and we compromise until we're both happy?
Speaker 1:Yeah, like never. You never remember Valentine's Day would be converted to. I just wish that you would acknowledge the day. It would mean so much to me versus you know the punitive, and so that has always stayed with me that behind every complaint is a wish in disguise. I just love that.
Speaker 3:And it is If you want something. That's why you're complaining Something's missing and we focus on what's missing rather than on what we want. Complaining something's missing and we focus on what's missing rather than on what we want. So, as you said, as you said earlier, as long as you focus on what's missing, it'll always stay missing. Sure, other things will probably go out with it. So, but if you, if you want something, be clear about it and also turn it into a behavior.
Speaker 3:Now I'd like to have valentine's day and celebrate it by taking me out to dinner, buy, buying me some flowers, giving me a hug when you come home. The partners need specifics, so they do it because all of us take an abstraction like be more loving, and turn it into our view of what more loving is, and it's always not what the partner wants, because we're two different brains and so we have to say what's in your brain about what loving is, and it's like well, a hug Okay, I can do hugs, and we do that and stretch. There's one thing I want to add to this conversation. That is, some people do not experience Valentine's Day positively. They dread it and they have negative emotional experiences on that, and there's a group of us and I say us human beings who, when we were little, were related to in such a way that we cannot receive positive messages, because in childhood the positive messages were never real, so you couldn't trust them. And so there we wrote a whole book on this called Receiving Love. And that is that some of us, because of our childhoods, although we may be in a working marriage, we have difficulty receiving love, receiving positive energy. So I think, just as an awareness, that if when your partner gives you something, you feel like you want to push it back and I know that there's a part of me that way, because when I grew up, if you got something, you had to give something, and it might be you better be appreciative of that, but you always had to pay for what you were given. There were no gifts. They gave them to you and called them gifts, but they were actually trades, and sometimes it can I mean, that's a mild thing it can get even worse.
Speaker 3:What got that clear in our minds many years ago was a client who said that in her childhood that her mother was fussing at her and said to her you will never be loved, and her brain recorded that as don't ever let anybody love you. You're not worth being loved. So then you get something. You say I'm not worth having this. You don't go through that. You don't go through saying that. You just feel awkward, like let's don't do that and don't do anything for me and it's. I don't want to be told that I'm bad for taking something and I also don't feel like I'm worth having anything. So there may be some emotional things, but the relationship can change all that by having non-transactional giving.
Speaker 3:We call it unconditional giving.
Speaker 3:There's no cost for this and it's spontaneous and it's free. And it has to be reliably spontaneous and free Because the brain takes. John Gottman says that we need five positives for every negative, and I think John's probably wrong on that. I think we probably need 20 positives for every negative, because the brain has this memory that if you hurt me, you can hurt me again. So it has to have enough interactions in which I'm not hurt to finally relax and say okay, I think you've become safe for me again. And we don't go through that narrative in our minds. The brain just has a little calculator in the back, and but I just think people ought to know that if there is a kind of discomfort with receiving, to know that probably that discomfort is rooted in some unfortunate interactions around your self-worth when you were little and bring that up and say and just talk about that. Or if you can't do it, go to a therapist and talk about that so you can get your receptors open for goodness and for wonder, and for wonder is a great gift to yourself.
Speaker 1:I think we have it. I know that we're about out of time, I know you have another appointment and I hate to leave you both at all because I could ask you questions forever. You have so much knowledge and experience. So, but I think what you just talked about about not everyone enjoys Valentine's Day is this idea in imagotherapy about otherness right? It's this differentiation of what I want, what you want. They're not going to be the same.
Speaker 1:The podcast I don't know if you're aware of it's called the Relationship Blueprint, because what I've learned is that Imago Theory gives us the blueprint for the connection and the love and the unmet needs that we didn't get when we were children. That we have a blueprint in this work and it doesn't always work perfectly because we're human children. That we have a blueprint in this work and it doesn't always work perfectly because we're human, but at least we have this wonderful design for living a life that's much more fulfilling than the one that I had before, and so I think one of the things that you've taught that I just would like you to maybe highlight before we go is how our differences are really a gift, that they don't seem like a gift, but that they really, really are. Would either of you like to speak to that?
Speaker 2:Well, I think, especially around healing each other's childhood wounds. So here's an example Harville grew up in Georgia and he never met his father. His mother gave birth to him and then she died when he was five years old and he had to go live with sisters. He was the youngest in the family that's nine okay, nine but he was filled with potential. He loved reading. He just was so interested in books but he was living. The worst of the sisters older sisters was Rosalie, and she would go you don't have time to read, stop it. You have to work the fields. You have to do this. And, by the way, I've got other kids. When we finished dinner, you washed the dishes and she was always managing, managing, managing him, and he never got to time to read. So one of the things when we married, I wanted to make sure he had plenty of time to read, and what I discovered is he loved Star Trek. Star Trek, what's that? And aliens, da-da-da. Well, guess what? I have fallen in love with watching YouTube videos about aliens.
Speaker 2:And Dad was a businessman. Mom always was doing volunteer work all over Dallas. They hired servants, so the servants took us to school when we couldn't drive and picked us up and neither parent was home. Dad was at the company and mom was doing volunteer work, and they were still out when we got home, even when we could drive. My childhood issue was feeling seen, noticed, and how was your day at school? Do you have any friends? So every night, before we go to bed, parvo gives me three or more appreciations of things I have done for him. And that is the best. That's Valentine's all year.
Speaker 1:You're really speaking to what we're talking about today, that this is a Valentine's Day episode, but we're really hoping that people take away something that is more of a way of living life, and I love when you shared that, although your upbringing was very different, you were both very wounded by having really absent parents for different reasons.
Speaker 2:Right, it's somewhat wound. They just wish their parents would be different. I grew up happy, but the happiness didn't come from my parents.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, and so you really needed to be seen and heard, and I imagine I never really knew that story before Harville, but I'm imagining this brilliant kid on a farm and wanting to eat and having to do all those things. I hear Helen at many occasions savoring your brilliance and how good that must feel to be acknowledged in that way.
Speaker 2:I just don't mind. The only other person in the history of global humanity that ever was interested in a different way to talk called dialogue, was Socrates, and he said you know young people don't tell them what to do, ask them questions. Say how are you feeling today and is there something I can do about it? A Jewish mystic, martin Buber space between. He says the word dialogue. There was no explanation for how to dialogue or what that means. It took that guy to figure out. He really refined the sentence stem. So lucky Helen.
Speaker 1:Lucky Helen, lucky Harville, and together they have written this book how to Talk to with Anyone About Anything, and there is a workbook that goes along with it and I will have this in the notes on the podcast. And really quickly, I know you have to go, but can you tell the folks about your next workshop if they want to see the founders of this theory doing a couples workshop, could you talk about that a little bit?
Speaker 3:Go on our website Arvel and Helen one word arvelandhelencom. You'll see our schedule because there are other workshops that are later that if you can't go to this one, you could go to the one the summer or the fall. So that's where to find out what we're doing and where we're doing it. And I have to the one the summer or the fall. So that's where to find out what we're doing and where we're doing it.
Speaker 1:And I have to tell you this, both of you that I found your work in 1987 on Oprah and I was in an unhappy marriage and I didn't have access to a workshop. So, fast forward, I get divorced, I'm dating a marriage family therapist with a commitment problem and he insists that I go to your workshop. So I say I'm like, yes, this is great, yes, let's go. I want to tell you that I learned so much about myself that weekend and, while our relationship didn't make it for a number of reasons, that was the day I decided to be an Imago therapist. Uh-huh, that was the day I decided to be an Imago therapist.
Speaker 1:I also know that I wouldn't be married to the man I have today if it hadn't been for that workshop, because what I learned was that I wasn't good at receiving love and I was choosing people who were unavailable. Once I learned that about myself, I had to learn how to get real comfortable with somebody who adored me, which was so foreign to me that it felt like I was wearing sandpaper. So I think that what your work has done for me personally and all of the couples that I've had the opportunity to work with, is so transformative and I just love you both and thank you deeply for being with me today and for all the work you continue to do.
Speaker 3:Oh, yes, well, thank you for having us. Yes, you are so honoring, yes, and we appreciate you and all that you have done for couples and how you have distributed Imago across the world.
Speaker 1:Well, we're just starting. We're going to keep it up. There's so much to spread, so thank you both. Happy Valentine's Day.
Speaker 3:Valentine's Day to you, yes.
Speaker 1:Yes, well, yeah, let's say year Valentine's Day Year.
Speaker 3:Yeah, forever.
Speaker 1:This is the Relationship Blueprint and where we unlock our power of connection and we'll see you next time on the Blueprint, and where we unlock our power of connection and we'll see you next time on the Blueprint.
Speaker 2:Thank you, everybody Wonderful. All right, thank you.
