Life is Delicious- Midlife, Menopause, Mindset, Miracles, Gen X Women, Empty Nest, Retirement, Self Improvement

Change Your Environments...Change Your Life!

• Marnie Martin • Season 1 • Episode 6

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Transform your life by reshaping your mental environment. Discover how the power of positive inner dialogue can lead to a fulfilled and empowered existence. With insights from Don Miguel Ruiz's "The Four Agreements," we unpack transformative principles like being impeccable with your word and always doing your best. This journey is about reframing negative beliefs into affirmations that nurture growth and happiness, highlighting the importance of regularly examining and adjusting your mental landscape.<br><br>This episode also explores the art of crafting harmonious spaces both at home and work to boost well-being and productivity. Learn how to tackle challenges with difficult colleagues, create a clutter-free home sanctuary, and make mindful choices about your commute and meals. By incorporating small pleasures and organizing your surroundings, you can create environments that uplift your mood and foster a peaceful and productive atmosphere. Let these strategies guide you in designing spaces that support your best self and enrich your daily life.

Speaker 1:

Hey, beautiful friends, it's Marni Martin and welcome to this episode of Life is Delicious. I'm a multi-passionate entrepreneur, best-selling author, foodie and voiceover artist, and I created the Life is Delicious podcast with one simple mission in mind to help you add more flavor to your life and to help you write your own recipe for a life that feeds your soul. I'm so glad you're here. Before we begin, I just want to say that I am so grateful to have you here and it's so great that you have taken some time out of your day to focus on something that will enrich your life. Today, we are going to talk about something that I think is hugely important, and it is the environment that we live in, and I like to think of our life like a series of mini environments, because there's a lot of different types of environments, some which we never even actually think of, that impact our happiness, our fulfillment, our well-being and our mental health. Let's start with environment number one, and we're going to go through a series of all the different environments and there's a handful of them and then we're going to talk about ways in which we can change, tweak, enhance and clean up some of those environments to support our best life. So the first one I want to talk to you about is our mental environment, and I think our mental environment is the foundation for everything else in our life the thoughts we think and the words we speak. They actually create the lens through which we see the world, ourselves and other people. So our inner dialogue is a huge piece of this mental environment, and if our inner dialogue is filled with fear, doubt, negativity, we're going to experience life through a lens of limitation. But if we consciously choose thoughts that are supportive, peaceful and loving, our entire world can begin to shift. Imagine waking up every day with a mindset that empowers you, one that fills your heart with confidence, optimism and inner peace. This can be possible when we take control of our mental environment and intentionally design it to support our growth and happiness.

Speaker 1:

So I don't know if you've ever heard about the book the Four Agreements, but it is an incredible piece of literature that was written by Don Miguel Ruiz. It's a really short read, so if you haven't had a chance to pick up a copy, I would highly encourage that. It is a super powerful book about setting our intention for the way we use our thoughts and our words for ourself and for others. So the four agreements basically are number one be impeccable with your word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

Speaker 1:

The second agreement is don't take anything personally. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be a victim of needless suffering. I love that. The third agreement is don't make assumptions. Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

Speaker 1:

The fourth agreement is always do your best. Your best is going to change from moment to moment, under any circumstance. Simply do your best and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret. So I love that. And this is such a simple concept, but a super powerful concept. So when we're looking at our mental environment, we have to look at the way we talk to ourselves and the way we think about ourselves and the way we make agreements in the world. So an agreement is simply an idea, an opinion or a habit of thought that we believe to be true, even if it's not the real truth. If we believe it is true, it actually becomes true for us. Our subconscious doesn't know the difference between real and fantasy and it runs on the programming that we set in motion through the agreements that we make with ourselves. So that's why it's really important to examine the agreements we've made with ourself on a regular basis to see if in fact, they're still true or if we need to adjust them and make completely new agreements with ourselves. And as you grow and change in your life, your agreements will shift over time and hopefully you will create a habit of self-awareness by paying attention to the agreements that you've made, because our agreements create the lens through which we see everyone and everything in our reality. So let's take a look at some examples of some very common agreements and how we might adjust them to help us break free from self sabotaging patterns and ways of being.

Speaker 1:

Perhaps you have a an agreement that just says I'm not a lucky person. Maybe you could change that to I am the luckiest person I know. We have to make a mental note that we're actually having that negative experience, and retrain ourselves when those negative emotions and words and agreements pop up, to be able to shift them to something more empowering. So maybe you have an agreement that you're too old to do certain things and instead maybe you could just say I'm so much wiser than I used to be and I'm never too old to learn something new. Maybe you have decided that you have never been good with math and so as long as you believe that it's going to be a challenge for you to do math, so maybe you need to change it to something like the more I practice, the better I get.

Speaker 1:

Maybe you have a habit of thought that says I can't afford it, so as long as you have decided you cannot afford something, it's very unlikely that you're going to attract the abundance to be able to afford it. So instead, how about that's not an economic priority for me right now? Or something even better? Money flows easily to me and I always have enough money for the things that I need. Simple, simple tweaks, but things that really will change the way you think and the way you feel about every single agreement that you have, because every thought you think contributes to the energy that you bring into the world. Then, when we actually look at not only the thoughts we think but the words that we use, obviously those matter as well. So maybe we could start by just writing down three negative thoughts that you often tell yourself and then, maybe, just like we did in the exercise, rewrite each one into a positive, empowering statement. How would your life change if you consistently spoke to yourself with love and encouragement? That's worth pondering. I think so.

Speaker 1:

The second one of our environments that is super important is our social environment the people we surround ourselves with and the activities we engage in. They shape our emotional well-being, our mindset and our overall happiness. So if our social environment is filled with positivity, inspiration and support, we thrive. But if we're surrounded by negativity, drama, unhealthy habits, our personal growth and our happiness can really take a bit of a beating. Your social circle includes your friends, your family, your co-workers and the communities that you engage with regularly. Maybe that's clubs that you're part of, or maybe you play pickleball. Whatever that is for you.

Speaker 1:

It's important to just stop and take a look at which one of these environments is supporting you and which one is not. So one of the things we talk about is that we become most like the five people that we spend our time with. So let's look at some of the people that you actually spend time with. Maybe make a list of the five or six or seven people that are in your life and with you almost all the time or most often, and then let's look at are those people supporting you and uplifting your dreams, encouraging you to do better, or are they kind of influencing you to maybe do some things in excess, maybe that you wouldn't like to do? Or maybe they don't cheer you on when you have a new project? It's just an important thing to look at, because it really will give you a different opinion about what you need to clean up and maybe who you need to spend a little bit more time with. Not that you necessarily want to cut out people from your life completely, but it's certainly possible to make different choices and spend more time with the people that lift you up, support you and nurture your well-being and your mental health. So we want to seek friendships that align with our values and we want to be intentional about who we invest our time and energy into.

Speaker 1:

Next, let's have a look at our workplace environment. I know a lot of people work from home these days, so this could be your home office or it could be your workplace, because your overall workplace environment has a profound impact on your productivity, your motivation and your overall job satisfaction. When you have an environment that supports and helps you to thrive and limits distractions, you just have a much better work experience. Maybe we could have a look at is your work environment clean? Is it tidy? Do you have things accessible that you need to be able to find when you're in the middle of a project? What could you do to limit the amount of distractions that you have? You know, maybe you could invest in some furniture that is a little ergonomically more supportive for your actual comfort and efficiency. What about your decor? Is it peaceful? Is there just clutter everywhere? Do you have beautiful pictures on the wall? Does it a place that you feel relaxed and inspired? Because that's where you do your best work is when you're inspired.

Speaker 1:

Sometimes our workplace environment also includes the people that we spend time with at work, and sometimes we have colleagues that are not necessarily supportive or maybe they're a little bit difficult to deal with. So what do you do about that and how do you limit that exposure? How do you keep the peace while doing a good job at your work and how do you navigate those situations? How does that impact the way you feel when you go to work? Are you feeling valued? Are you fairly compensated for the work that you do? If you're not, maybe it's time to negotiate or explore some new opportunities.

Speaker 1:

One thing I've found to be very effective in terms of looking at time management in your office situation is maybe using the Pomodoro technique, which is 25 minutes of work and then a quick five minute break. How long is your commute to work and does that contribute to your stress? Do you bring healthy meals from home? Are you eating from a vending machine or fast food every day? What about being challenged in your current position? Do you feel appreciated when you do a good job? Are you able to grow and is there room for you to add value? Are you being paid what you're worth?

Speaker 1:

And if you work from home, do you have a dedicated space that you can limit distractions and allows you to kind of switch into work mode? That can be a really big contributing factor. Is your space cluttered or messy, or is it tidy and easy for you to work in and find the things that you need. Here's one when you work at home, do you stay in your pajamas all day or do you still dress for work? There's no judgment here. It's just a matter of looking at the things and the habits that you're doing and seeing how does it make you feel?

Speaker 1:

I know for me personally, when I get into a workflow, sometimes it can be really easy for me to be still in my house coat at noon because I got onto a train of thought and I went with it and that is sometimes a really valuable thing. But other times, when I really make an intentional effort to get up and wash my face and do all my morning routines and then get dressed and go to work purposefully, I tend to have a little bit more of a productive day and I tend to be able to get in my zone a bit quicker. Do you have flowers on your desk or items in your space that make you happy? I love having a beautiful workplace and one of the things, even in my office, that I did this year is I added a hummingbird feeder on the outside of my office window. I am absolutely enamored with hummingbirds and I have several feeders around my house, but it's absolutely one of the things that adds to my happiness, and I could be in the middle of a work project and just look out the window and see those little guys and it just elevates my mood instantly. And it might seem like a very small, simple thing.

Speaker 1:

Oftentimes the most impactful things that make us happy can be very, very simple. So look at your space and see what's working for you and what maybe needs a little bit of a tweaking or changing or completely letting go up. The next one, of course, is our most important environment, or our largest environment, and that is our home, where we live, who we share our space with and how we choose to create the vibe in our house. I love this quote by Peter Walsh. It says your home should be the antidote to your stress, not the cause of it. So your home is your sanctuary. It's the place where you should feel safe, relaxed and inspired. If your home is cluttered and chaotic or uninspiring, you can often feel more stress or it can drain your energy. So it's really important to intentionally create spaces within your home that can nurture your well-being and your happiness. So we're going to talk about ways to declutter, organize and kind of look at each room in your home as something that is going to create space for you to be your best self. So of course, we've got our kitchen and our living space.

Speaker 1:

One of the things that I find contributes to my joy in a big way is having a tidy home, and I really subscribe to the fact that everything kind of has a place and I try to put things back where they belong, and it just allows me to feel much more peaceful. When I wake up in the morning and my counters are cluttered with grocery bags or laundry or something like that, immediately I feel my sense of stress go up, because I love to come into a clean kitchen in the morning. It's the most favorite way for me to start my day. I don't feel like I have to do anything, it's just like oh, it's so nice to be here. All of those different things can shift. Do you have enough space in your house to put things away in closets? Could you maybe find different ways of reorganizing your closets and your spaces in your home so that you would be able to maybe let go of some things so that you can have some clean countertop space and that you can find things when you need them.

Speaker 1:

Now. Everybody's life is different and not everybody thrives in an environment that is completely tidy. Some people really have that organized chaos where they know where everything in their space is, and if that's you, then that's okay too. This is really all about you evaluating what's working for you and what's not, so there's no judgment, no shoulds, none of that stuff. This is all about thinking about your space. The other thing we can think about is like screens in our home, like is your TV on all day? Do you play peaceful music in your house? Do you like to have candles burning or maybe some essential oils that enhance the space and invigorate you? There's just so many ways that we can actually add to our peacefulness without very much actual effort. We want your home to recharge your batteries and to make it feel like a retreat, a place where you can separate work and relaxation.

Speaker 1:

Your bedroom should be the place that you can relax, share intimacy with your partner. Maybe you're nurturing a baby, but it should be a haven of comfort, relaxation and balance. And your bedroom is also the place where you sleep, and sleep is a huge component of your emotional health. So do you like your room cooler or do you like it darker. Maybe you need to have the windows open, or maybe you need blackout curtains and white noise so that you can actually get to sleep and have a peaceful rest. Whatever that is for you, I prefer nice, dim lighting in my home. I also find that sometimes adding like lavender or chamomile can really promote sleep and relaxation, and, of course, our sleep hygiene is a huge piece of that as well. Do we do before we go to bed? Do we turn our screens off, or do you have the news playing right up until 11 o'clock or whatever time you turn in, having maybe a nice routine like a cup of tea, maybe some gentle stretching, maybe you listen to a meditation or do some gratitude journaling before bed. All of those things should be in your environment and at the ready so that you can access them and enjoy letting your space recharge you.

Speaker 1:

Also in our home environment is our outdoor space. Maybe you live in the country and you have a nice big piece of property and you have a garden, or you create a little sacred space for yourself outside. I know for me my outdoor area. I have a deck and then I have a fairly decent size lawn and I moved in there in 2021. So I've been in here about three years and when I first moved in I didn't have any garden space at all. I had planters on my deck and stuff, but I was traveling a fair bit at that time so I did not want to plant a garden because I didn't want the stress of having trying to look after it or find somebody to take care of it while I was away, so I never had that. But for me, a garden is 100% my happy place. So last year I decided I was going to be home for the summer or mostly home and I decided to put in a vegetable garden and a flower garden and I can tell you that my happiness factor in the summer went up by about 1000% and I would go out every morning with my coffee and sit with my garden and just watch the butterflies come and the hummingbirds, and just to see everything growing and to be able to harvest my own food was just such a joy. It could be anything for you. Maybe it's having a garage that you can work on cars in, and maybe you share that with a child in your home or a teenager. It doesn't matter what it is for you, but creating that little sacred space anywhere, either on your indoor or outdoor space, is magical and really important to your emotional and mental health.

Speaker 1:

Another important aspect to consider is your relationship with your significant other. How is that environment? I know that doesn't seem like it's an environment, but it is kind of its own ecosystem. So what we want to look at is, you know, are you and your partner on the same page? Do you support each other? Do you still respect each other even if you have differences? Do you make time for quality time together each day or each week? Do you treat each other with respect and kindness? Are you still attracted to each other? What could you do to make each other feel more appreciated? Do you have some specific needs that aren't being met? What is amazing about your relationship and what would make it even better? The dynamic of two people in an environment, whether you're living together or separately, the environment that you bring to each other when you're together, has a huge impact on how you navigate the rest of your life. But again, all of these things are for you to uncover for yourself. There is no wrong or right answers here. It's really about just taking a temperature gauge of what really feels good and maybe some things that could just use a small tweak.

Speaker 1:

The key to a meaningful, peaceful and productive life is integrating changes across all of these different environments. Each environment needs to be curated separately your mental, your physical and your social environments to create a harmonious ecosystem that supports your personal growth and your happiness. So, to recap, we went through our mental environment, number one. Number two was our social environment. Number three was our office environment, or our workplace environment. Number four was our home environment. Number five was our office environment or our workplace environment. Number four was our home environment. Number five was our bedroom environment. And then we looked at the external home environment, like the yard that you live in or the city that you live in and what you could do to enhance your outdoor space. And then we were talking about your relationship environment, and then we were talking about your relationship environment. So when we take all of those things and look at them together, we want to on identifying the areas in your life that need the most attention, and you can't do it all, so you have to pick one or two things, set small, actionable goals for each environment and how you want to change it. Small changes make big, big results. Like I say, the addition of that hummingbird feeder to my office environment just skyrocketed my happiness.

Speaker 1:

Be consistent with your changes and be patient as you integrate these changes into your routine. Things are going to be a little bit different for a while, and that's okay. And then you want to create a system that supports all of the areas of your life, working together in harmony. And every year your environments will change, so be adaptable with that and don't be afraid to revisit some of these concepts in a year from now, or a couple years from now, or whenever you have a major life change. Whether you have a child move out of the house, or maybe you have an elderly move out of the house, or maybe you have an elderly parent move into the house. There's all kinds of different phases of life where your home environment, your work environment and your mental environment are going to have shifts. Recognize when those changes are happening so that you can make some small corrections and get back to your best self.

Speaker 1:

And I love this quote by Lao Tzu the journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. So when we talk about creating environments that support a healthy life, it's just doing it one step at a time. You got this. If you enjoyed this episode, I would very much appreciate it if you would leave me a review on Amazon or wherever you get your podcasts. That would mean the world to me, and if you loved this episode, please share it with somebody who might need to hear this information today, in case nobody has told you today. There's not one person on this planet that's exactly like you, and the world is a better place because you're here. So thank you for being here. Go make it a great day and I will see you next time on. Life is delicious.