Life is Delicious- Mindset Mastery, Midlife Empowerment, Joy, Purpose, Vitality, Inspiration, Women's Health
Ever feel like midlife has you running on an endless hamster wheel of responsibilities while your own dreams gather dust? Is the crazy chaos of caring for everyone else leaving you exhausted and overwhelmed? Are you in desperate need of some self care, balance and reconnection with your most authentic self?
I’m so glad you’re here! This podcast isn't about surviving midlife; it's about crafting a next chapter overflowing with purpose, joy, and delicious possibilities.
I'm Marnie Martin, a multi-passionate entrepreneur, daughter and a hot midlife Mama (literally) and over the last decade, I've been through career pivots, a divorce, and I survived the empty nest, only to have it fill up again. I spent the next several years travelling miles and miles every month to care for my elderly parents and my time and attention was so torn in every direction that I lost track of who I was, and I found myself in an endless cycle of people pleasing, putting out fires and running on empty. I know how it feels to be stuck in chronic overwhelm, stress and chaos and trust me, it's not a pretty picture.
I decided that it was time to take MY OWN life and health back and I worked hard to reclaim my health through radical self care practices, recalibrating my nervous system and setting healthy boundaries that allowed me to start living my life "on purpose" again. I'm here to show you that midlife doesn't have to be a crisis, but instead a beautiful invitation to remember who we are, to rediscover a new version of ourself, or to completely re-invent our life to reflect who we are becoming now-intentionally crafting a life by design that truly nourishes our soul. If you are ready to take back YOUR "Joie de Vivre", then you are in the exact right place!
Each week brings conversations with health and wellness specialists, spiritual growth experts, and guests with courageous and transformative stories that will inspire you to break free from the overwhelm. You'll walk away with practical strategies, meaningful insights, inspiration and the permission to prioritize yourself again.
We were born to thrive and experience life as the delicious feast it's meant to be. Subscribe now and join a community of midlife women who are turning up the volume on their inner voice and writing their own recipes for a life that feeds their soul.
Life is Delicious- Mindset Mastery, Midlife Empowerment, Joy, Purpose, Vitality, Inspiration, Women's Health
14: Why The Word NO Is The Ultimate Act Of Self Love And Respect
Do you struggle to say those two little letters – N-O? You're not alone.
In this deeply personal exploration of boundaries, we dive into why saying "no" feels so difficult—especially for women, mothers, and caregivers—and why it might be the most radical form of self-care you can practice. Drawing from fascinating research by Dr. Vanessa Bonds at Cornell University, we discover that people actually respect our boundaries more than we think they will. The chronic people-pleasing many of us engage in doesn't just drain our energy; it disconnects us from what truly matters.
For those caught in the "sandwich generation," simultaneously caring for aging parents while supporting adult children or grandkids, boundary-setting becomes even more critical. When everyone needs a piece of you, who advocates for your needs? The answer is simple but profound: you must become your own advocate. Through practical scripts, time-buying strategies, and simple mindset shifts (like the powerful reminder that "every no to someone else is a yes to yourself"), this episode offers actionable ways to reclaim your time, energy, and joy.
Setting boundaries isn't selfish—it's necessary for showing up as your best self for those you truly want to serve. Ready to transform your relationship with "no" and create a life that feels intentional rather than reactive? This episode might just change everything. Listen now, and take the first step toward a more vibrant, aligned life where your needs matter too.
https://www.LifeIsDelicious.ca/bookshelf ( Happy Is Not An Accident)
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Website : https://www.LifeIsDelicious.ca ( Podcast) and
https://www.MarnieMartin.com ( Voice Over )
Email: marnie@marniemartin.com
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Hey, beautiful friend, it's Marni. I'm so glad you're here and if this is your first time here, welcome to the. Life is Delicious family, where we explore simple recipes for living a vibrant, healthy and joyful life. Today, we're diving into a topic that has the power to completely shift how you show up in your everyday life, how you speak to yourself and how you communicate your value to the world. Today, we're talking about boundaries, specifically the power of saying no, the trap of I can't and two other little words that just might change your life.
Speaker 1:Today we're diving into something that many of us have struggled with, especially as women, daughters, mothers, partners, caregivers and community builders mothers, partners, caregivers and community builders. We're talking about the power of saying no. It sounds simple, right, just two little letters N-O. But for so many of us, saying no feels wrong, feels heavy, maybe even selfish. In fact, most of the time it does feel selfish. But what if I told you that saying no might just be the most loving, powerful, life-giving word in your vocabulary and that every time you say no to something that drains you, you're saying yes to something that fuels you, your health, your joy and your dreams? Let's explore that together. Let's explore that together.
Speaker 1:Let's start with the hard truth. Many of us are programmed to please, to avoid conflict, to put other people first, and while kindness is a beautiful value, chronic people-pleasing comes at a very expensive cost. According to Dr Vanessa Bonds, a social psychologist at Cornell University, people vastly underestimate how uncomfortable others feel when asking for favors. In other words, we often say yes because we don't want to make someone else feel bad, when they probably expect or respect a boundary more than we think. We fear being seen as difficult or unkind. But in reality, saying yes when we mean no often leads to stress, resentment and burnout. Often leads to stress, resentment and burnout. So ask yourself where are you giving away your time, energy and power? Because you're afraid to say no? Let's be honest Every yes has a cost, and when you say yes to things that don't align with your values or your well-being, you're saying no to joy, rest, creativity, self-respect, time with your loved ones, maybe even your health, and over time, this pattern leads to a life that feels disconnected from you.
Speaker 1:You're checking all the boxes for everybody else, but inside you're tired, irritable, maybe even a little bit lost, because resentment is a very heavy emotion and this can actually be something that we deal with a lot in midlife, especially when so much of us are, especially when so many of us are in what we call like the sandwich generation. And if you're not familiar with the sandwich generation, it's being in a place where you have grown children, or maybe even kids that are getting prepared to leave the empty nest, and you probably still have your parents alive, so you've got their well-being and aging concerns to deal with, and some of you even have the added stress of grandkids, which is not a stress, but of course it adds another level of people that you need to care about and where you need to put your time. And it's just a lot sometimes and if we're not careful, our needs can vanish under a pile of everyone else's expectations. But you're not here to be everyone's everything. You're here to live a full, deep, intentional life and to be of value to the people that you love. But you're less likely to be the best value you can, but you're less likely to be the best version of yourself if you give yourself away too often.
Speaker 1:But here's the good news often, but here's the good news, saying no is a skill and, like any skill, we can learn it and strengthen it. It's like a practice. So let's break this down into a few ways that we can add this to our life. So let's break this down. I mean, sometimes when we get caught off guard by a request, we freeze and we don't have a response. So I think what might be a really good strategy would be to create some kind of a script, a no script, and maybe you have a couple of different ones, maybe you try. Thanks so much for thinking of me, but I'm just not able to take that on right now. Or I'm honored you asked, but I'm keeping my calendar lighter these days to prioritize my health. What about that? Sounds like a great opportunity, but it's just not a fit for me at the time. It's just not a fit for me right now. But thank you for asking and practice saying it out loud. You don't owe anyone an essay.
Speaker 1:Just short and sweet is kind and to the point, and that way you put yourself and your priorities first, and sometimes it's hard to actually do that without taking a little bit of a pause. So if you just don't have that script on hand and someone asks you to do something that you just don't feel is aligned with where you are or what you need at the moment. Then ask them to give you a little bit of time. Let me get back to you on that. I'll call you tomorrow. Let me check my schedule, or maybe you just say I'll sleep on it and I will get back to you and that just gives you a minute to actually sit with the request and see if it is a fit for you. And maybe you do want to do it, but maybe you just feel like you don't have enough time. So that'll give you the opportunity to check in with yourself and decide for you if it's the right thing.
Speaker 1:Try putting a sticky note on your mirror. This is a really fun exercise. It's. This is a really fun little game you can play with yourself. Just go get yourself a sticky note and put on. Just go get yourself a sticky note and just put on it Every no to someone else is a yes to myself and put it on your mirror in your bathroom and read it and look at it and build it into your day and start to feel comfortable, not apologetic for prioritizing your own well-being. And start becoming comfortable and not apologetic for prioritizing your own well-being, because the more you practice, the more natural it'll feel.