59: The Midlife Empty Nest Reset with Kelly Salmons

The moment your kids leave home can look “normal” from the outside and still feel like an emotional free fall on the inside. The house gets quieter, routines break, and a question starts whispering in the background: who am I now? We’re naming that experience for what it often is: empty nest syndrome, a real midlife transition that can bring sadness, anxiety, decision fatigue, and a surprising loss of identity.

I’m joined by Kelly Salmons, founder of The Nest Evolution, who shares her own jarring empty nest story, including what “functional freeze” feels like when you’re going through the motions but nothing is working. We talk about the pressure to be “fine,” the way social media can hide the truth, and why “good on paper” doesn’t always mean you feel good in your body. We also get into the sandwich generation reality: shifting hormones, aging parents, evolving relationships with adult kids, and the emotional cost of decades of caretaking.

Kelly offers grounded, practical ways to move forward without trying to perfect your way out of pain: resetting your nervous system, choosing one small action a day, using structure to reduce overwhelm, and rebuilding clarity through journaling or even voice recording and transcription. If you’re craving purpose, connection, and a real plan for your next chapter, you’ll leave with language, tools, and hope.

Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a review with the one takeaway you’re trying this week.

Transcript

Why Empty Nesting Hits Hard

SPEAKER_00 1:37

Hey beautiful friend, it's Marnie and welcome back to Delight. Today's episode is one that I know is gonna land deeply for so many of you. Especially if you are in the season of life where your role as a mom is shifting, evolving, or even feeling like it's quietly disappearing, which it never does. Because here's the truth. And we're not talking about this often enough. When our kids leave home, it's not just about an empty bedroom. It can feel like an empty space inside of us. In fact, studies show that up to one in three women experience symptoms of the emptiness syndrome, feelings of sadness, loss of purpose, anxiety, and even depression during this transition. For many midlife women, especially those of us in the sandwich generation, this season can hit even harder. Because we've spent decades caring for everyone else, being needed, being the glue. And then suddenly everything changes. The house gets quieter, routines shift, and there's this question that starts to whisper Who am I now? And if you've ever felt a little lost in that space or a little untethered or even guilty for not feeling as free as you thought you would, you are not alone. And more importantly, there's nothing wrong with you. This isn't an ending, it's just a transition, and when supported properly, it can actually become one of the most powerful reinvention points of your life. Empty Nest syndrome affects millions of women worldwide. Yet it remains one of the least understood life transitions. Here's what the research shows. Twenty-five to thirty percent of women experience significant depression during the emptiness transition. Forty per cent report identity confusion when children leave home. And sixty-seven percent experience relationship changes with their spouse or partner. However, 70% of women who receive proper support report improved life satisfaction within 12 months. That's inspiring. And that's why I'm excited for today's conversation. Today I'm joined by the incredible Kelly Salmons, who specializes in helping women navigate the empty nest transition with intention, clarity, and a renewed sense of purpose. She's created a collective called the Nest Evolution, and in this episode, we're going to talk about why empty nest syndrome is so real and why so many women feel blindsided by it, the emotional and identity shifts that happen during this stage, and most importantly, how to move from feeling lost to feeling lit up again. So if you're in this season or you see it coming, this episode is going to feel like a deep exhale and a beautiful beginning. Welcome to this episode of Life is Delicious. I'm Marnie Martin, and I'm so glad you're here. And if this is your first time here, welcome to the Life is Delicious Family. This podcast isn't about surviving midlife, it's about crafting your next chapter life, overflowing with purpose, joy, and delicious possibilities. Listen, midlife doesn't have to be a crisis, it can be a beautiful invitation to remember who we are, to rediscover a new version of ourselves, or to completely reinvent our life to reflect who we are becoming now. So if you're tired of being exhausted, living life on autopilot and putting everyone else first, then you are in the right place. Each week we'll bring you thought-provoking ideas and practical strategies as well as inspiration to help you prioritize yourself again. It's time to take back your Joie de Viv. So grab a notebook and pen and pop in those earbuds, and let's go get it. Welcome, Kelly, to the Life is Delicious podcast. I'm so happy to have you here, and I think the topic that we are going to discuss today is something pretty widespread that a lot of women are going to connect with. So tell us who you are and how you kind of got started in this particular business.

SPEAKER_02 5:58

Sure. I'm Kelly Sammons and I'm the founder of the Nest Evolution. I my background, uh, let's see, I was in the Navy, I was an educator, uh network administrator, entrepreneur, teacher. Uh so I've worn many hats and done a lot of things, but always had that desire to serve others. And as I went through my empty nesting phase, and I'm in my empty nesting stage of my life now, um, I had a lot of struggles. And so um I'm here now because I've created something to help others, uh, other empty nesting moms kind of deal with that. So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:48

That's amazing. And I love the idea that you've created sort of a collective for people to come together because I think more women than we probably realize struggle with the empty nest syndrome. And I don't think it's talked about as often as it needs to be. And I know your journey was pretty jarring and surprising that you felt the way that you did. So tell us a little bit more about what happened in your personal life when you found yourself in the empty nest.

Functional Freeze And Identity Loss

SPEAKER_02 7:17

Sure. So um long story. No, um, you know, I was living on a mountain, and both my kids had headed off to school. My husband was traveling all the time for work, um, and said, okay, I like this was just as I was kind of coming into it, COVID, all of you know, all of the things. And um, thankfully I moved to Florida thinking, okay, great, I'm gonna go back down and I live next door to my sister so that I have family around and to kind of help work through the process. And I went back into education and and started teaching again. And I thought, perfect, I love teaching, I love design and curriculum, and that'll totally fill that hole of my kids leaving the house and heading off to school. Well, it wasn't the right job, it wasn't the right position, just it wasn't right. Um, and I found myself being like in a black hole because I didn't like my job, I didn't know what to do, I'm sitting there at home trying all of these things, nothing's working, um, and just feeling completely stuck and lost, and just kind of in survival mode or like functional freeze where I was going through all the motions and you would never know that I wasn't happy. But I was miserable. And um, you know, one day I I my I I was home and my husband said, Oh, hey, what do we get, what do we want to do for dinner? And I just started crying because that overwhelmed me so much because I just couldn't I couldn't make my list, and you know, I've always used my list to get me out of everything and to get everything done, and I just I it didn't work. And so it was it was really hard, and I just was kind of stuck and lost and and and just cycling in it and and couldn't figure out how to you know move forward because every time I think about oh well I can move forward, and then I would just get further lost. Um so yeah, it was a a really interesting time, you know, and then add in, you know, the stage of life and and hormones shifting and and helping my parents as they started, you know, are starting to age and and you know, also figuring out my kids and the new relationship there. You know, all of those things kind of came together. It's kind of like a perfect storm.

SPEAKER_00 11:56

It's interesting because I think that whole idea of the functional freeze is something a lot of us have dealt with in one capacity or another. I've had it myself, but not so much with the empty nest situation. But I think what's really interesting is that when our identity changes and we're so used to being mom, and then all of a sudden, like you say, our our relationship with our kids is changing, and now we have to let them make decisions that we don't have control over anymore. And there's just so many layers to all of what's going on. It's not just that grieving the loss of having um an empty bedroom in your house, it's an empty space inside you that feels like you don't know how to fill it, and it's a really strange place to be. So so how did you work your way through that and how did you come to create the nest evolution?

SPEAKER_02 12:49

Um so you know, like 40% of women struggle with like their identity as they become empty nesters. So it's it's not a small number of us, you know. That mom identity, we've we've had it for a long time and and we wear it, you know, with most of us with pride and as a badge. Um so it's it's a big transition and a big shift. I um, you know, I tried several different things. I I took some time off after teaching because I had continued teaching for a little while, um, even though I knew I was gonna leave. So I know that didn't like help in me moving forward faster because I was not happy where I was with my job, but still, you know, polypositive and and you know, making sure that the kids had a great day at school, um, you know, as far as my students. So I, you know, I did a lot of escaping uh into fantasy and you know, romanticy books, and um I worked with some folks and and tried some different um things that sounded interesting to me um to see maybe would that be a spark that would give me something that would allow me to move forward or grab on to something instead of just wanting to go back and read the next book. Um and you know, I saw a retreat for female veterans, and I was like, oh, that's cool. And I kind of read through it and it was just like a random post on a, you know, on online. And I was like, well, that sounds cool. That's that's neat. Okay, next. And then it came up again, and then I was like, no, and I started digging into it, and then I saw it a third time, and I had been thinking about it, you know, and I I turned to my husband and I said, I I really think I want to do this. And he and my mom for Christmas that year paid for the retreat so that I could go to Costa Rica for seven days. And it was it was amazing because you know, I wasn't grounded, I wasn't centered in myself. I was very much you know stuck in analysis paralysis, but overanalyzing everything and still trying to figure out how do I fix this, what do I want to do? I don't know what I want to do, what am I gonna do when I grow up? You know, all of the you know, the things we tend to like fixate on and and and kind of spin on, and um that opportunity to go. And I mean, you know, doing yoga and and forest bathing and uh you know, breath work and some energy work and you know, cacao ceremonies, and like all those experiences were so wonderful um because each one helped me ground back into myself and and reconnect with myself. And on top of that, it was seven days where I didn't have to worry about anything. I you know, I turned my phone off, I I just focused on me, and it was such a gift because it allowed me to stop and and and just be and take a breath. And I think so many of us when we get into a major transition in our lives, we we you know we're running and we're we're hustling and and we forget to be. And that was so important because it allowed me to really kind of find a place and and and accept with well, wow, I'm really struggling, and and that's okay that I'm really struggling, but I wasn't ready to accept it until that week. Um, and and kind of, you know, we did an exercise looking in the mirror and like talking to ourselves and kind of giving an oath to ourselves, and and I really struggled with that and and committing to taking care of myself. Um, and that was an eye-opener for me as well. And so all of that allowed me to kind of come back as a much more myself and much more in myself so that I could be um begin to really actually move forward and and um that's amazing.

SPEAKER_00 17:29

Go ahead, sorry. No, I was just gonna say it's it's um it's amazing that you took that time for yourself and that it's also um one of those things that we it's so interesting because we're so innately good at looking after our kids and our husbands and our families and our parents and everybody. And that just comes naturally to most of us that have the mother instinct. And then there's this place where it's like, why don't I do that for myself, right? And then your nervous system is all over the place when you're in that fight or flight or functional freeze, whatever you call it. So just giving yourself that gift of seven days to reset your nervous system, allow yourself to breathe again, because so often we can't even begin to take a step forward when we don't know which direction we want to go.

SPEAKER_02 18:18

And that's exactly it. Um, you know, and that was huge, and that allowed me, you know, like I came back, my sister was like, hey, wow, oh look, you're you're you're like, you're you're almost it's almost all you back, like the real you is back. Um, you know, because I would sit at sit at family dinners. I I live next door to my sister and my parents, so we have a little family compound, and um, and so we'll get together for dinner, you know, on a regular basis. And so often I would go and just kind of lock into my phone and I'd be there, but I wasn't really there. And I might comment for a few minutes, but then I would withdraw. And so it was nice to come back and actually like be part of the conversation and want to be part of the conversation. Um, you know, it wasn't completely fixed, but it was leaps and bounds ahead of where I was at.

SPEAKER_00 19:15

And um And that's a nice that you live next door to them because so many people do not have that. Like my parents are, you know, probably well, my dad now is about six, seven, eight hours away from me. And you can still get there, but next door would be pretty awesome.

The Costa Rica Reset And Nervous System

SPEAKER_02 19:32

And and you know, in some days, some days we spend lots of time or some weeks we spend lots of time at other days or times it's like, okay, everybody's going to their house because we've all had enough of we've had enough family love and you know, have our own spaces and we can retreat to our safe spaces in our homes.

SPEAKER_00 19:51

So a blessing and a curse, right? It's finding the balance.

SPEAKER_02 19:55

Exactly. But yes, I'm very thankful that that is the situation that I'm in and able to be be there for for for everybody. Um again, serving others and you know, making sure I come back and am taking care of myself. Um how I kind of came to having the Nest Evolution. So much of it was, you know, there were still many steps that I kind of took to get to this, but um it was really I wanted a community. I wanted, and I would go to certain events, I got into some real estate and recognized that that was lighting a spark for me and giving me something that I wanted to take action on on a daily basis, um, which then allowed me to, you know, find more clarity in what I wanted to do and how I kind of came to the nest evolution. And and so that um meeting different women and networking with them, and then also talking about, you know, where we're at in our lives and being empty nesters and all of those things. And I just realized so many of us are feeling the same way, but we don't really share that. And we don't really, you know, it's not like you're gonna get together and be like, hi, I'm Debbie Downer. Let me let me tell you how I'm missing my kids a lot and I'm miserable. And I know you're one of my besties, but but you know, you look really happy and and kind of that social media, like everybody else's lives is are beautiful and wonderful, you know, and we're not really seeing behind the camera or behind the scenes what you know the the struggles that people have. Um so that was part of my reason for wanting to create a community or a a place to come together and connect. Um that's so important. To to share. And, you know, that was something I think, um, you know, and as I've aged, I've found that more and more I want communities in in things that I'm interested in or in areas that I'm you know interested in. Um because it it's great doing it by yourself. And but when you can do it and at the same time help, or you're lifting up, or others are lifting you up as you're going through it, uh there's nothing better than that. Like it just feels so good that your, you know, your little story that you bring or share or your experience may help somebody else have a huge, huge breakthrough and allow them to take a step forward or you know, to to get the the next thing that they're looking for.

SPEAKER_00 22:44

Yeah, and I think what's really fascinating is so often when we go through those kinds of challenges, we feel like we're the only one, and there's this real sense of loneliness and like I'm like nobody understands this because I'm going through this thing. And I remember going through a phase where one of my sons was dealing with some pretty serious depression, and I just didn't know what to do with that information, and I I just did the best I could. And I remember being at a dinner party one night, and I just somehow this the timing was just good and the right people were in the room, and I felt safe enough to say, I'm really struggling with this. And what blew my mind was probably three or four, maybe even five other women said, Me too. And all of a sudden, my entire perspective on that shifted, and I realized how important it is. And like you say, I think that's the fear is because we're afraid to be Debbie down or we're afraid to come in and go, I'm struggling with this. But I think what's really important is when you find a safe community, you find this beautiful collaboration with other people where you can share ideas and help each other through the hard stuff.

SPEAKER_02 23:59

That's exactly it. Uh you know it's interesting, like in teaching, uh I I always take so many things back to being an educator and teaching. And, you know, you're in your classroom and you're kind of, you know, in that little like box with all your students. And, you know, I did middle school, so they'd cycle through and then you'd have the next group, and then you'd have the next group, and those few minutes in between where I could go out into the hallway and talk to the other teachers. But it was amazing what we were able to create and collaborate on in just two or three minutes in the hallway, in between classes, while, you know, telling the middle schoolers to calm down and, you know, whatever else, all the other things going on. But it was so amazing how we were able to like lift, you know, raise our bar as educators, raise the opportunities or the experiences for our students. Um, and and often those few minutes were like the highlights of the day because it got you excited about what you were gonna be doing next, or you know, the project that you were gonna go work on, or the the spark that you know it inspired. And and so I think that you know probably is also like an underlying reason for having a community.

SPEAKER_00 25:19

Yeah. What what would you say are some of the silent struggles that a lot of women face in midlife that maybe nobody's talking about.

SPEAKER_02 25:29

Well, I I mean I think you obviously, you know, one of it is is just feeling like you're the only one. We all tend to do that and and you know our brains tend to to uh help us down that path, especially if we've got negative talk and negative speak going on in our heads. You know, we we overanalyze and and or you know you can't online and you know like get online and start looking things up and it tells you all the all the horrible things and you're like no I just stubbed my toe like I'm not dying I just stubbed my toe. You know but I think we we we um do plastic. Yes absolutely um I think we struggle to make a decision because we don't want to make the wrong decision and we feel like it's because we're in that survival mode or that you know functional freeze mode um we struggle with making decisions again because we'll overanalyze or want it to be perfect or or don't want to make the fear of the wrong decision. You know one of the things that that I have found to be tremendously beneficial is if it is not a life or death or like a major decision like okay I'm buying a house I'm not buying a house like that takes a little more time to think about right but like what am I having for dinner? Well that's you get five minutes set a timer five minutes make the decision move on fine it's chicken nuggets and a salad like okay great but you know what now we're eating and we're moving on and you know what you can always change your mind but it's like I think we sometimes build up the decisions to be such big decisions when in fact really they're not it's like no just go pick that toothpaste off the shelf like you know nobody's gonna die if you if you eat chicken nuggets right like okay like it's not the healthiest meal but you know what at least hey I've I I've I'm fed and now I can go ahead and maybe I'll think a little clearer now because my blood sugar is more regulated and and now I can like make a meal plan for the next couple of days. You know but um so often we just get stuck in it. And um I think that's a lot of it I again I think not wanting to to share a lot of people just don't want to share that they're not that they aren't totally together. You know or they've been brought up to kind of keep the walls of everything is perfect in my world and and everything looks great and and you know we're silently so struggling on the inside.

SPEAKER_00 28:03

Yeah the whole idea of I'm fine and uh especially now with the social media stuff and how you see everything's curated so perfectly it's it does create a really false sense of what's actually going on in everyone else's world and I think that's a huge trap we can all fall into. So I think that's really important to and I hate the words I'm fine because there's just nothing good that comes from that because fine is is not thriving, it's not struggling, it's not anything it's just so you know lukewarm and and you know what fine stands for right?

Community And The Silent Struggles

SPEAKER_02 28:38

Yes. So you know it really is you know it really is uh we should take it out of our vocabulary you know exactly like words you're not allowed to use at home right um but um yeah you know and I think recognizing that and and the other thing I think at least something for me was everything was good like I live in Naples Florida I'm a couple miles from the beach it's beautiful my car's paid off my kids you know are in school or have graduated from school like everything's good.

SPEAKER_00 29:17

Yeah again though that's the other piece right is good is also the enemy of great right it's that exactly like and and yeah all those things are good but I'm still not happy. So there's something else under the surface you know that needs to be addressed and looked at and you know we're so bombarded with the shoulds you should be happy if you have a car paid off and you live near the beach like what do you have to complain about? But that's really not what we're talking about today. We're talking about a very real syndrome that happens to people because it's just something they didn't expect and they have to maybe find new ways of taking care of themselves with the same love and compassion that they would their children. And that's that's not something we're taught to do. And then you get to this place in life and it's like wow I gotta relearn this whole new thing so that I can I can look after myself and figure out what's next for me. And that's that's a big challenge. So yeah so the empty or sorry the nest evolution tell us a little bit more about what that is and and then maybe give us some advice to some of the emptiness women that are listening right now who feel kind of stuck and what they can do to fix that.

SPEAKER_02 30:36

Yeah so the nest evolution is is a community where we we meet um it's not on Facebook but it's you know in another on another platform um and can communicate with each other we can come together we we do monthly kind of a teaching or coaching or sharing um you know that that I lead um and uh always have an opportunity for question and answers and sharing and then as we continue to grow we'll be adding in um a second um like guest speaker every month coming in and talking about things that that we're interested in at this stage of our lives you know whether it's uh finances in your 50s or um hormones or you know nutrition uh whatever it might be you know there's lots of different things menopause paramenopause how to deal with aging parents how to address um situations with your grown children um you know and bringing in people because I'm not an expert on all of those things but bringing in folks that are certified experts or you know that is their job to come in and talk about those things um and provide you know just a place to have answers and um uh again a place to come together and connect with others so that we can move forward. A couple of different things that uh you know I have the the NES method which is basically you know navigate basically where you're starting from so that you can move forward kind of like my uh you know my opportunity that I had on my retreat um but working through activities to help us kind of accept where we're at um and then uh embrace embrace what needs to change and embrace the changes that are coming strength for us which is remembering our strength um so often we forget how strong and how amazing we are and what we need is right here inside of us. We don't need to go out to lots of other things um sometimes it is that reflection of sitting and looking at times that you've been through something and and remembering what those strengths are that are really important because you can look at that and say oh wow I do have that in my toolbox you know we forget sometimes some of the the things that we've done and um so working on that and remembering our strength and then transforming and designing what we want our lives to look like as we move forward. So that's kind of the the a very brief overview of the nest method um through um and you know again the the community is something where you can jump in at any time um and we'll just keep working through the different aspects of it as we're going. A couple of things I think again the decision one is huge um because I really feel like when you're stuck and you don't know what to do, you want it to be perfect. And so you you read everything and you you take all these classes and you do all the master classes and you do all of the um you know read every book you can find on it and and so you're doing everything but you're not actually doing whatever that thing is. And and so um that's the analysis paralysis right it's like right and and so you're not really moving forward because you're not actually doing the thing. And I know there's a poem out there about do the thing um but but it really is it's amazing like for me I you know didn't know what to do and I realized hey well you know I really do like real estate and I worked with a real estate investor for five years um and learned a lot and and so I took a a$17 masterclass that was like five like two hours a night for five nights and going through it it won it helped boost my confidence because I was like oh I know what we're talking about like I understand oh I've done that oh I've done that um and and so that like you know helped boost my confidence but then it was also like no this is good like tomorrow I want to go like I'm gonna go do this and and I started making my list again and I knew when I started making my lists again like okay I found something that you know has really sparked something for me and I want to move forward. And so I think that you know finding something maybe you really enjoy gardening or you always wanted to grow orchids or be a bonsai um you know have bonsai trees and learn how to do that. So what could be your step? I mean you hopefully maybe buy a plant and keep it alive but that's not my strength. So you know maybe go to a master gardening class. One you're gonna meet other people and and two you're gonna learn a little bit about that and you may go and go no forget it like there's too many bugs and I don't like the dirt or you may meet some new people that can kind of become a new tribe for you and and really feel connected to them. So you know it can be I I don't want to say it can be as simple as that like it can be as simple as that.

SPEAKER_00 36:18

It doesn't have to be um you know designing your whole life in your blow the whole thing up and start from scratch. It's just taking one step in in a direction that's new. And I think what's really interesting is I think there's so many of us that have forgotten some of the things we used to love to do when we were younger because when you get thrust into motherhood and now you're in this full blown thing and you're looking after the kids and then you got school and drop off and PTA and whatever else you got going on and it's just full blast, right? So then there's all those little things that we used to love to do when we had lots of time and it's just remembering those things and allowing ourselves to put that back into our life to add some joy and some peace to us that that is like prioritizing ourselves first, which is really uncomfortable at first but once you get the hang of it's pretty awesome.

Small Steps For Clarity And Joy

SPEAKER_02 37:16

Yes and and I will say having been in the Navy I I moved away from wanting to have a constant schedule all the time and and I recognize you know now that I no I it's good when I have a schedule and I have things scheduled because I get things done when I have other things scheduled that I have to do right it's just like even with our kids you know if they just had free time all the time well then I didn't really need to get my homework done because I I have plenty of time mom. Like why are you bothering me? Stop nagging me I got plenty of time. But you know when we have lots of activities or um things that need to happen or things scheduled hey I'm gonna go work out at this time or whatever um you know you recognize oh okay I've got you know an hour here I need to make these four phone calls in this hour. And all of a sudden you get things done. And and you know I think that's important because you you know we've given so many like you said like you know my kids' dreams were my dreams my I you know did what everybody needed and I put things aside and and and so many of us do that. And and then all of a sudden they're off you know conquering the world and and finding their success and doing the things and and figuring it out and they don't necessarily need need to to spring back to us as much.

SPEAKER_00 38:44

Well if we've done our job right if we've done our job right exactly and and you go and live their lives and it's good.

SPEAKER_02 38:53

And and we celebrate those you know their their their their things but but I think you know one of the things that we've forgotten is is to dream and you know I remember sitting in a a personal development class um or working on a mindset class and it was like okay here you've got the you know like these two pages go ahead and fill them up with all the things that you dream of that you want like just be outlandish be whatever and you've got like 10 minutes and I wrote down like one or two things. Yeah that's hard for a lot of people yeah so that's something I encourage others to do and then do it if you have a spouse or a partner or you know somebody that you share your your your life with do it with them as well. Yeah you know because that can help like my husband and I we did that and all of a sudden we realized well okay we both want these things and some of these other things that we thought each other wanted neither one of us wanted. So it was like oh great let that go.

SPEAKER_00 39:57

Yeah and that's a great exercise.

SPEAKER_02 40:00

Right? And now we're more focused and together and clear on the things that we both want or that you know either one or the other wants so that we can support and and move forward towards those things. Yeah I love that's clarity.

SPEAKER_00 40:16

Yeah that's such a great thing and I think clarity is the biggest obstacle to all of what we're going through and and I work with women all the time on you know you can't really design a life of your dreams if you don't really know what you want. So it's all about allowing yourself to remember what you love, remember what you used to love remember what comes easy to you and to be able to say what's next and to be able to not be afraid of wanting something that you haven't had time to pursue yet because there's still so many years left and there's so much joy in being able to step into our authentic self at this age because we have so much wisdom and so much more ability to be comfortable in our skin I guess is the way to put it 100% I think that taking small actions no matter what it is like some days it was hey I got out of bed and you know some of us maybe that's where we're at like today I got out of bed.

SPEAKER_02 41:22

Yeah that may be your action for the day. Some of us it may be hey wow today I took a walk and some of us it may be hey wow today I put in you know an offer on a property or I went to uh an art class or I went to you know um a job working group or a volunteer organization that I've always been interested in being involved in right um but it's finding something that you can do even if it's super small every day some sort of action to help you move forward. And again that doesn't mean that this is what you're doing for the rest of your life but maybe that's what you're gonna do for the next two or three weeks and then you're gonna go yeah no but now you're gonna be clear that that's not what you want but there's something else out there that you might really want. Um and and be, you know you might find that thing as you're working through it. But if you're not taking that little action each day to kind of move it forward then then you're never going to be able to get that clarity.

SPEAKER_00 42:30

Yeah and I'm a huge proponent of journaling. I think journaling I've been journaling my whole life I probably journal a little bit less now because I'm I'm probably a little more clear but when you whenever I've had those moments of not knowing what's next it's amazing how just sitting still and not giving yourself any kind of you know there's no way to get it wrong when you're just writing in a journal. You just write down how you're feeling and what you're thinking about and where you are and all of a sudden you go wow I didn't even know I thought that and then and then you can really give yourself some grace and go, wow, I I can move forward on that but now that I know um it's okay for me to let myself have it, you know, and that's such an important thing.

SPEAKER_02 43:15

So I would encourage that a hundred percent to anybody who's kind of going through a rough time because that's your sort of mirror in some ways and you know what I think you know obviously AI can be some of our our our best friends and our worst friends but but I think now there's so many opportunities where you can also record things. So I know for me like I struggle a lot with um writing and I just would get hung up in my head about writing um but speaking it and just saying it out loud and talking it. And so now you know now I can record it and have it transcribed and then I can go back and look at it and be like oh wow look at oh I said that I don't even remember saying that but hey wow I said that okay that's really cool. Like I didn't even know I was thinking that about myself or thinking that that was something that I was interested in. You know just kind of that stream of consciousness again same thing with writing it but some for some people I know um writing may be more of a you know it it's it's a block a roadblock.

How To Join Nest Evolution

SPEAKER_00 44:22

Yeah for sure and I think that's a really good point because I think there's mixed camps on you know using AI kind of like a therapist of sorts but but in some ways I do find like you say just being able to speak out loud you know just put put the record button on on the AI and and just talking out loud stream of consciousness like that. And I have done that recently and I do find it to be fascinating to also you know surprise myself as to what I'm really thinking and how I articulate what's going on with me. And sometimes you don't realize that you probably know more than you think you know.

SPEAKER_01 44:57

Always know more than you think you know.

SPEAKER_00 44:59

You always know more than you think you know. And that's that's the piece, right? We discount and discredit how much our intuition and the the inner knowing that we have is truly our compass to get us to where we need to go but it's when we forget to listen to that that we kind of get a bit more lost.

SPEAKER_02 45:17

I agree with you yes and that why you know that whole wise woman stepping into the crone or wise woman you know age and and we're here to help educate and and provide the wisdom to to the next generations. Yeah and and that may be in volunteering at the library that may be in you know going back and and you know starting a business that does whatever it may do. But you know I think that that's important and and it is important to embrace that and and go with it and again having you know those crazy little ideas that pop into your head or into your journaling you know if they keep popping in there's probably something there.

SPEAKER_00 46:12

Yeah absolutely awesome well this has been such a great conversation and again I think it's one that's very timely and important for us to have so we can give ourselves grace to move forward and and realize that some of these phases that we go through in this midsection of life is just not we're not alone in that situation and we need to you know give each other grace and connect with each other and be able to support one another. So maybe tell us um before we close up here how listeners can connect with you and how they can join the Nest Evolution if that's something that would feel like a fit for them.

SPEAKER_02 46:51

Absolutely so thenestevolution.com they can go there and connect with us and see what we have coming up and we have a masterclass coming up in a couple of weeks so they can always jump on and and kind of see and learn a little bit more we'll do a an exercise or two and and I'll talk more about the nest method if that's something that they'd like to learn more about. But really they can just go to the the website and check it out there. I'm also on Facebook your empty nest evolution um And on Instagram.

SPEAKER_00 47:28

Excellent. That's awesome. Well, thank you so much for being here with us today. And I wish you all the success with the Nest Evolution. And hopefully we can do this again sometime.

SPEAKER_02 47:38

Yeah, thank you so much for having me, Marty. I've really enjoyed our conversation today.

SPEAKER_00 47:42

So if today's episode resonated with you, I would encourage you to share this with someone that you love who might be going through some of these transitions themselves. It's really important for us not to feel alone, and it might just be the one thing they need to hear today.