43: Why Trauma Shows Up in Your Body: Healing, Boundaries, and Faith ft. Julie Conkle

Trauma does not always look like one massive life-shattering event.

Sometimes it looks like emotional needs not being met.
Sometimes it looks like learning to perform.
Sometimes it looks like codependency, control, numbing, people-pleasing, or living in survival mode for so long that it feels normal.

In this episode, Dr. Brook sits down with Julie Conkle for a powerful conversation about trauma healing, faith, boundaries, equine connection, and what it looks like to become a generational chain breaker.

Julie shares her story of growing up in a faith environment that taught performance more than relationship, walking through addiction and an overdose at 21, and encountering Jesus in a way that changed the direction of her life.

Together, Dr. Brook and Julie talk about what it means to stop identifying with what happened to you and start walking with God toward healing, responsibility, restoration, and freedom.

Inside this episode:

• Why trauma can be more subtle than people think
• How emotional neglect, fear, and unmet needs can shape behavior
• Why codependency often grows from the need to feel safe
• How numbing behaviors can become a response to unprocessed pain
• Why healing requires both God’s power and your participation
• How comparison and regret keep people stuck
• Why community matters when you are trying to heal
• How horses can mirror emotions and create space for peace
• Why boundaries are essential for emotional and spiritual health
• How to take inventory of your relationships, environment, time, and beliefs
• Why setting a boundary is not self-rejection
• How the body can speak through inflammation, fatigue, pain, brain fog, sleep issues, and hormonal changes

A key takeaway from this conversation:

What happened to you may not have been your fault.

But healing does invite you to take responsibility for what comes next.

That does not mean shame.
That does not mean blame.
That does not mean pretending the pain did not happen.

It means taking one honest step with God, with support, and with a willingness to let Him rebuild what was broken.

Julie also shares how horses have played a powerful role in her healing journey. Through equine connection, she has experienced peace, grounding, emotional honesty, and a deeper picture of God’s love.

This episode is a reminder that your story is not wasted.

Your trauma does not get the final word.
Your past does not have to define your identity.
And your body may be showing you where healing is still needed.

Connect with Julie:

Instagram: @jewelseye314

Reach out to Julie on Instagram if you have questions, want to learn more about equine experiences, or are trying to take your next step toward a healthier life.

If this episode encouraged you, share it with someone who is walking through pain, rebuilding after trauma, or learning how to set boundaries without guilt.

✨ Your body has been trying to tell you something.

Find out what it's saying with the free 30-second Body Signal Decoder Assessment. Pick your signal, get your personalized guide straight to your inbox, and finally start making sense of what's going on inside.

Get it here: os.drbrooksheehan.com/decoder

🎧 And if you caught the mention of the Talk to Me, Body affirmation card deck during the episode, here's where to grab yours. 63 scripture-anchored cards to help you trust the body God designed for you.

Get yours here: drbrooksheehan.com/talk-to-me-body/

📱 Come say hi on Instagram: @drbrooksheehan

⭐ If this episode spoke to you, would you take a second to leave a five-star review on Apple or Spotify? It helps more women find this show. And more women learning to listen to their bodies is exactly why I do this.

Transcript

Julie Conkle (00:00)

I was really living in fear and anxiety of what other people would do to me if I showed them who I really was, and that they would leave me, and that they would abandon me, and that they wouldn't really love me. And it was such a lie that I walked in for so many years and so much of how it really created a narrative where I did self-reject.

Welcome to the body speaks podcast with me, Dr. Brook Sheehan. Join me, on a journey, in discovering how to interpret the subtle signs your body uses to communicate with you - the whispers, the screams, and everything in between. Your body truly holds the answers for your health and wellbeing. It’s time to discover them, together. Let’s dive in.

Dr. Brook Sheehan (00:00)

Hello, hello and welcome. So excited for another episode. You guys are in for a treat today. This is a dear friend of mine that we are going to get to hear from. And I'm not going to tell you who it is yet. I'm going to leave a little mystery like I like to do when I read the bios. But this woman is a woman of faith whose story reflects not only healing, but resilience and restoration.

And after walking through some significant personal trauma, and a dedicated journey of health recovery. She has emerged as a generational chain breaker. If that's a term you're not familiar with, we might be talking about it today. So stay tuned.

Committed to breaking cycles, pursuing freedom and living a transformed life through her relationship with Jesus. She is deeply rooted in her faith and passionate about serving others and advancing God's Kingdom. She carries a message of hope for those walking through pain or seeking renewal in their spirit.

And she is also an avid equine, which is horse, enthusiast who finds connection, peace and strength in the outdoors. And her life is a testament to God's redemptive power and His ability to restore and rebuild and make all things new. Who is this beautiful woman I described right there? This is Julie Conkle. Julie, welcome to the show.

Glad you are with me today.

Julie Conkle (01:30)

Thank you so much, Brook. It is such an honor to be here with you and all the listeners. I hope that you are able to get something from this that truly touches not only your heart, but allows you to have breakthrough, whether it be in new thinking or that something just really resonates and connects with you. The whole purpose to being able to share with Brook is to allow people to have a new experience than they've had before.

Dr. Brook Sheehan (01:50)

So beautiful and I can't wait to dive in. I'd love for you to share with the listeners first, like in your bio, the testament to God's work in your life, but where was Julie before all of this? What was that journey that God brought you through?

Julie Conkle (02:11)

Yeah, you know, Brook, it's kind of like, we can all look through our journey as far as okay, what type of family did we have? How did we grow up? What did that really look like? And, for me, I was always raised in the church, but I really learned like a spirit of religion and really how to perform and how to be like a "good girl" per se.

I didn't know the relationship with the Holy Spirit that I do today, and really finding a Holy Spirit-filled church. And so, my upbringing was very disciplined, very regimented. I had two parents that loved me, but what I know now is that through their generational ⁓ upbringing that they were actually very avoidant, which in turn led to a series of different behavior for me that kind of led me upon my journey of looking to numb or seek ways to not feel all the emotions because I didn't know how to process them.

And so, I really encourage everyone, no matter where you're at, yes. I think sometimes when we are still in a place of rawness, we can sometimes feel maybe like a victim or like this happened to me. And what I've learned is, even if something happened to me, it might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility to walk that out. And sometimes that's messy, you know? But what I really learned is there's a systematic way that I kind of was able to put things in place for myself of like, there can be an event that maybe happens.

And so many times people think trauma is like this horrific war kind of episode where now, thank God, through really good research, we found that trauma can be even a death in the family. It can be something small as far as your emotional needs not being met. And so I found that it can be a traumatic event, which then leads to behavior, right? And what I found was like codependency and needing validation and acceptance and approval, but also because I didn't feel seen or worthy that I really was looking for like, how can I control? How can I fix? How can I make my environment safe for myself of what I know is going to be okay for me? Which then led to actually numbing out with drugs and alcohol because the behavior just didn't work for me as far as having my needs met anymore.

And that then led to a road of recovery for me. And that's really where I look at it, where I actually overdosed when I was 21 years old. Yeah. Today I look at that as the day that my life really started. I really had an encounter with Jesus and I knew that my life had meaning, I knew that my life had purpose and that I was supposed to be doing something down on this earth as much as I really wanted to go home.

That it was time to really walk through the pain and the trauma that I had walked through the first half of my life and really seek to understand what God's love is, what His purpose is for me, what my true identity in God is, but also what are these indicators that my body's telling me? Why is it that I'm having hormonal changes? Why is it that I'm not able to sleep? Why is it that I might be not having the clearest of minds? And so through that journey of unpacking really how the body signals to the mind and how the mind signals to the body, I was able to walk through a journey of renewal.

Dr. Brook Sheehan (06:01)

Wow, wow, wow. I want to actually unpack that a bit if you're okay with it because I think it's easy to sometimes, and you said it so beautifully, how we tend to put ourselves in victimhood a lot of times when things happen to us, traumatic experiences and we just can't get out of this spiral, and there might be a listener right now listening to this who feels like every single prayer she's throwing up, you know, in a Hail Mary type thing, God help me. And it's not getting answered or things are going on in her life that just doesn't feel like there's any movement happening.

And it's easy because I've been there just, I mean, listening to your story, different, different things, but very parallel in terms of what God has done and how He's weaved that through. But I've been there where I've looked at other people's "growth" and been almost resentful at that.

Like, God, why is Julie, like, why is she thriving? Why are things going great in her life when she did all these things, horrible mistakes or, you know, missteps along the way? What would you say to somebody like that as we're unraveling these pieces, what that looked like for you in terms of getting to this place of restoration and renewal and understanding that?

Julie Conkle (07:06)

Right.

That's so beautiful. It's not easy. And even if it doesn't feel like it, God is there with you. Jesus is there with you, even if you can't feel it, even if you can't see it, even if you feel like things are so dark and that you are so misunderstood and that you feel so alone and that all of the emotions are just overwhelming your entire body. And when you look at your maybe life circumstances and we have to remember that God tells us not to compare and look at the world.

And that was one of the biggest things that I had to really step back and go, I can't compare myself to somebody else. My story is a story that God's writing over my life. And even if I don't understand right now, I have to look for understanding. And the way that I did that is honestly by really diving into the Bible and diving into the Word. I was really lucky,

I did go through treatment, but I did go through a restored ministry at my church and it's a 12-step recovery ministry, but it's for anybody, anybody that's maybe having relationship problems, emotional problems. It's not just drugs and alcohol, today in this world, we have real problems and we need somebody to help steward us along that path to really finding out where do I connect the dots as to why I'm feeling this way.

And usually I find with victimhood, at least for me, I just wanted someone to listen to me. I really wanted someone to listen to me. I wanted somebody to really meet me where I was at and understand, not just to respond or to tell me what was going on, but to really understand and say, hey, have you maybe considered a different way? Have you maybe considered how that really felt for you? And for me, I was so disconnected.

I'd have all these emotions coming through, but I didn't know how to really go, I'm actually angry about that. I'm actually sad about that. That actually really hurt my feelings. I could justify and say, well, this happened. And, my brother was just really confused at that time. And so that's why he was angry and lashed out at me. I didn't, you know, I would justify for the other person as to maybe why I was feeling and with codependency, you take on a large amount of responsibility that's even not yours.

And so, yeah, and so I really had to understand through my walk of personal development, what was mine, and what was theirs, and to be able to release that. I think so much of it too, I held onto that identity of what happened to me and I wore it around. And what I found was that I had all of these defense mechanisms and really what had happened was those defense mechanisms created certain behavior and certain thought processes of really how I was walking through life, and where I really wanted meaningful relationships, but I really was pushing people away because I didn't understand myself. And so the more that I learned how to actually not self-reject, but how I learned how to really love myself. And the way I was able to do that was I stopped looking for that validation from other people and really formed a relationship with God.

Really formed a relationship with Jesus and understanding like, okay, if that type of love wasn't modeled to me, when I was being raised, what does that really look like? What does that really feel like? What is, I mean, even if I have the knowledge in the Bible, I need to have an experience, Jesus talks about having an experience with Him.

And so, how do I, how do I do that? And so I looked for people that... and I found that in my church. I looked for people that were living that. I looked for people that were actually doing that with others and I learned the goodness that God had placed in me and I was able to stop running this narrative of the past identity. And thank God, like through years of personal development, I had already walked a lot of that out.

But then when I landed in a church that was able to really connect the dots for me, I was able to really let a lot of those other parts of the trauma and really where I needed God to come in and heal my heart where it says like, God will replace your stony heart with one of flesh. And so that's really where I got to fully receive, but for so long and, really for those listeners, I found that I was so scared.

I was really living in fear and anxiety of what other people would do to me if I showed them who I really was and that they would leave me and that they would abandon me and that they wouldn't really love me. And it was such a lie that I walked in for so many years and so much of how it really created a narrative where I did self-reject.

I think like, you know, there are men and women on this podcast, but especially for women, that there is like a spirit and I call it a spirit of self rejection and an unloving spirit ⁓ that really gets projected in comparing and like a narrative that gets ran.

And so if you are in that place, I really encourage you to look at places of how can you have positive self-talk? How can you, because God talks about that we have so much weight in our tongue, right? The words that we really speak and even if we don't realize it, even if it's like, oh, I'm so stupid. That was so stupid that I did that. And it's really, it might be in your mind that you thought it was stupid, but it really isn't. Yeah.

Dr. Brook Sheehan (13:12)

Yeah. Right. So, so powerful, Julie, and thank you so much for sharing that, because there's there's a lot there.

And there's a lot of practical things people can take from what you just shared there in terms of you were part of a community. You got involved in a community. Yes, you did some personal development work prior to all of that, which helped set a little bit of the tone, but you had to take a concerted effort to make one step forward. Right.

And I feel like people, when they get in this stuck mentality or the victim mentality going back to that, they plant their feet in concrete and they say, I can't move, I can't move, I can't move because that fear and anxiety and all that darkness and the lies and everything that gets whispered in their ear is holding them in bondage. And it's taking that, that going, no, I'm going to read the Word of God.

And I hear this a lot too, especially, you know, we are working in that same ministry together, which is so  beautiful. But I also hear a lot of people go, well, I don't hear the voice of God. I don't know how you guys hear Him. It's almost like this jealousy feeling kind of comes out where you talked about comparison. They're comparing their journey with God to our journey or to somebody else who's maybe 15 steps in front of them and they can't do that.

That's where we go wrong is when we start comparing things and to honestly hear the voice of God you have to start spending time with Him. You have to get intimate with Him. Julie and I didn't meet each other at church and all of a sudden she knew everything about me, what I like, what I dislike, where I want to go for coffee, what I want for lunch. She didn't know this.

After all these years, Julie knows a lot more about me than she knew that first day. Yes, God knows everything about do we know everything about Him? And He really wants to show Himself to us and He shows Himself to us through His word. And it is just being intentional. You don't need to do Bible roulette.

There's so many different programs with the Bible app, with different apps that you can get on, and do different reading programs or different devotionals, even if you have to start as small as just getting into a daily devotional and having a small one to two scripture thing there to help you really walk through this. And the more that you do it, Julie is a walking testament to this because she talked about the overdose at 21 years old, that could have been her life.

She could be here right now with needles in her arms, on the streets, all of that, but no, God's  redemptive power saved her life, but she also had to be a partner with God in that. It wasn't just all of a sudden, right? She had an encounter with God and he's walked her through it. So it's being very intentional about that and looking at that going, if God can do for Julie, God can do for me too.

So I just want you guys to be encouraged by that. And Julie, I know you work and I love, I just absolutely love your Instagram posts with all the horses running in the field. And I work with patients right now who do a lot of work with horses and the emotional, and horses really do, like, they can be very healing for humans and trauma and all of that.

If you want to speak into that as well, how that works, but then also, don't they mirror our emotions? Maybe I'm wrong about that, but then there's something along those lines, like horses can kind of feel into that?

Julie Conkle (16:58)

Yeah, just so that the listeners know, I grew up with horses. I was blessed to have a mom and a dad, but really it was my mom that had this passion for horses and it has been a God-given gift in our family. And so I was really blessed to have a mom that showed me that love and that passion for those animals and the connection with horses, and I can say as a testament through my healing journey, there's been so many times that I have been frustrated, broken, just so lost and going back and just being able to cry in a field with a horse standing there or getting to conquer mountains, that I was able to sit there and just go, wow, God, You are so big.

You love me so much. Look at how You created the mountains. Look at how You created the flowers. Look at how You created this incredible horse that I'm on. You could be making so many other things, but You made this creation and You made this moment merely just for me. And what I love about horses is they don't care how you show up. You don't have to show up with your makeup on, your hair done, wearing the right clothes, or anything.

It's really like how Jesus said, just come as you are. Just come as you are. If you are broken or if you're in despair, just come as you are because I want you to just be able to experience love and goodness and understanding and kindness. And horses represent that so beautifully in it. It has been a huge walk for me, but also in being able to work with a demographic of people and invite them into that space. Horses, yes, they do mirror you.

And it's so interesting how so many times, even in myself, I'll see where I'm projecting my own stuff on to horses. And that it really allows me to see myself, it really allows me to go, oh, what's really going on with me today? But the sensitivity, like a horse will link its heartbeat up to you, you will link your heartbeat up to them. And that is why they're so healing because they have this electromagnetic field that allows you to actually experience a level of healing that is, I believe, God-given. And so it's been some of my greatest journey in my own work, but also in being able to help other people and coach them through their own experiences.

But I think the most beautiful thing about a horse too is they're gonna meet you exactly where you're at and you're gonna be able to receive that love. I mean, to have a thousand pound creature come up to you and wrap its neck around you and pull you into its heart center and let you know that you're loved, just merely because you're there, is one of the most beautiful things and it is truly like how Jesus is. He just wants you to meet Him there, if you'll allow Him.

Dr. Brook Sheehan (19:40)

Oh. Oh. My heart is just like, melting. I just, I love that. I didn't grow up with horses, but we did do some horseback riding when I was younger. And I know I've had that experience that you talked about. And for people who might feel like, I'm in a concrete jungle here in downtown, whatever town. Where am I going to find, going out to the mountains or the big field, open fields, is you can be intentional about finding that even in your park, and sitting down in the grass and maybe even randomly finding a little insect that might be running around on the ground. Not that the insect is gonna wrap itself around you and love on you like the horse would do, but that you can see this crazy, amazing and incredible, magnificent creation that we live in, right?

We're so, sometimes have the blinders on that it's so beautiful that you can get out there with the horse after long stressful days or just so much like, I just need a stress relief and you just go out there and it's just like, wow, none of that matters. This is what matters, connecting with the God of the universe, connecting with the God who so desperately and recklessly like pursues your heart. So just in that. And then if you're able, like I'm sure there are so many different areas where you can go and find horse therapy, because that is a different way that it's not your typical therapy that most people talk about, but horses are amazing in that. So thank you so much for sharing that, Julie. I love that.

Switching gears a little bit. I do want to talk about boundaries and setting healthy boundaries and making boundaries be a part of daily decision-making. So we're talking about walking through a lot of trauma and things and people with broken hearts and trying to figure out how God can heal we know, are super important, especially as recovering co-dependents who want to be saviors to everybody. We can't, especially when we're walking through our own journey to find self-love and that love and acceptance that God has for important are boundaries and what would you say around that topic?

Julie Conkle (22:07)

So boundaries are the foundation to being able to really walk out life in a healthy way. And once I became more aware of who I was and what was important to me, I think those are the key things of really being able to separate you from other people or you from other beliefs and knowing, okay, what do I really believe?

What do I believe about myself? What does God say about me? Then it's really, it was kind of interesting for me to sit back and go, okay, what's acceptable to me and what's not acceptable to me? And what I found was, when I made a list or when I was aware of the things that were unacceptable to me, it allowed me to detach my emotions, okay? Because it was no longer acceptable to me, right? So those things are not acceptable to me. I'm not gonna have this emotional charge. I'm able to leave it on the side, right? And go, nope, that's not for me.

I'm gonna continue to move forward. And at first, that was not easy, because I would feel this emotional pull, or I would feel from me operating in one way for so long that it was really kind of foreign to me, as far as how my old way of operating, right? And so that was a big step for me. And a big part of that too was to be around, again, community, friends that we're walking in that way, for me to really take, we call it an inventory, but God calls it like, you're gonna take stock, right? You're gonna take stock of the different things in your life.

So I took inventory of my environment. I took stock of my friendships. I took stock of the people that, where I was spending my time, my work environment. All those different things and I looked at it and not going, that doesn't work for me. You're gone. Not like that. Because my old way would be like, I'm just going to cut you off and I'm going to operate this way and I can justify it. Right. Right. So it wasn't so much that it was really sitting back with true reflection and going, okay, this doesn't work for me because it's no longer loving or honoring towards myself.

I'm not going to hang out with people that are staying out till three in the morning drinking and being promiscuous. Like that's not healthy for me, right? Now does it mean that I don't love or understand those people? Of course I do. Of course, I was once there, you know, but it doesn't mean that I have to put my time there. And I think that's one of the biggest thing is time is a currency that we can't get back, and it's one of the most valuable things.

And when I look back through my life, I don't regret, but I look at where I once thought like, gosh, I wasted a lot of time. I wasted a lot of time in that. But then when I was able to truly understand God's heart, and seeing His purpose, I was able to meet myself with actually love and compassion and go, no, nothing is wasted. God tells me nothing is wasted. What can I learn from that?

And what really sitting back and looking at even situations that happened with friendships or family relationships, and getting to a place where I was healthy enough with my emotions because I had set clear boundaries and going, okay, well that happened. What is the information that I learned from it? How can I sit back and really look at that and not be emotionally charged around it and not to disassociate. I want to really be clear with that because I did disassociate a lot for a lot of years, because I just couldn't process the emotions. I didn't understand. So finding the boundaries, again, of going through what is really acceptable to me? What do I believe? What does God believe?

And where is my identity? I was able to create a roadmap of knowing the truth from the false, and being able to have a point of origin and a point of destination. But also I really encourage people if you don't have a mentor or somebody to that's healthy, key phrase healthy, that you are seeing is walking that out in their own life, that's really where I had to learn too.

I had to sit back and go, okay, what does that sound like? What does that look like? What are healthy relationship dynamics? If I'm setting this boundary, what is, I mean, I think so many times, I looked at things in my life as like, oh my gosh, if I set this boundary, what's the circumstance? Oh my gosh, are they gonna leave me? Again, my biggest fears were abandonment and not being loved.

And so, really sitting back and knowing if I set this boundary, not only I'm not rejecting myself. And so that's what I found through my journey of setting boundaries is there were so many times where I didn't or I didn't hold firm to the boundary, and really in that, I was breaking my own heart. But most of all, I was breaking God's heart. Yeah.

Dr. Brook Sheehan (27:28)

Wow. I love this conversation. I do believe a lot of people are going to be getting a lot out of it. I mean, I'm just listening to it and it's so, so just oozing with God's love and just showing what true transformation can look like, right? I've already gone back and talked about what it would have looked like had you not gotten sober and clean and all of it. But like how then setting the roadmap and making sure you have good mentors and good leaders and healthy friendships.

This is not an overnight process. I don't want to give off the illusion that, all of a sudden, you're going to set a hard boundary and you're going to be A-okay and everything's going to be fine. It is an intentional baby step forward, a shift in your mindset, a capturing, taking thoughts captive like the Bible tells us to do. Be renewed by the transformation of your mind.

This is not trying to you know, just reset your mind, but it's renewing your mindset, the way you think about things. So Julie just gave such beautiful examples  of setting boundaries, but like also sticking to the boundaries, because what ends up happening is you set a boundary and then you might fail,

which we all do. We all fall short. We all are going to fail.

The key thing here is not to start condemning yourself, to start having self hatred, to start all of the process of just spiraling you down into a darker hole, it's to recognize, oh my gosh, I set a boundary. I said, I didn't want my mother-in-law calling me drunk at midnight every single day, setting a boundary, putting my phone on do not disturb. This is unacceptable behavior. I'm not going to partake in that.

Well, maybe you do accidentally answer and by accidentally, maybe one day you are awake and you see the call coming in, you're like, if I don't answer it, she's going to die. Don't beat yourself up for that. The very next day you, you start implementing that same boundary again.

So it's just taking little baby proactive steps with the Lord, with community, with friendships, with good leaders, and making it a point to start really building back these pieces of your life. Because it may not be drugs and alcohol and major trauma, but Julie said it in the very beginning, trauma is relative. When we're young, our dog that we had for three years can be very traumatic if the dog passes away. When we're older, we look at that and go, okay, well, that's the cycle of life, things like that happen. But our brains as little kids don't recognize that.

The other thing I want to put together, well, we talked about comparison, I don't know if you said this exact word, but it was almost like do not have any regrets. Like, you know, we have comparison and then we start to regret. We look back and we're like, well, why didn't we get sober at five years? Not that you were doing hardcore drugs, but at five. But you know what I'm saying? We always look back and we're like, why didn't it happen sooner? Why this? Why that? And we live in this state of regret and comparison. And those things are so evil to any progress in your life.

Julie, like just, oh my gosh, I love this conversation so much, but we got to keep the train moving. I want to ask you, so my listeners know, I ask every guest on this show, because it's called your body speaks, is how do you believe your body speaks to you? Is there a certain sensation or certain symptom or signal that comes up that it's like, Julie, waving a flag. Pay attention to me.

Julie Conkle (30:44)

Well, I guess, over 10 years ago, I actually had gotten diagnosed with fibromyalgia. And now I just say, I was experiencing those different symptoms. But for those of you that don't know maybe what that comes from, it's from the body being hit with traumatic stress. And so I found at that time, I was working, I was a hairdresser, I was working like 14 days a week, and I was in a really toxic relationship. I was engaged and I would be tired. I'd have all this inflammation.

And even in that moment, it's like my body was trying to indicate to me that I needed to deal with  the traumatic stress, but also the trauma that I still hadn't faced. And so, the body is so beautiful in the way that it will let you know, hey, sis, you're not paying attention to this. I really need you to slow down and actually give me some of your undivided attention to unpack this because I can no longer continue to function in survival mode. I can no longer continue to function with adrenaline and cortisol running through your body to make you function on a day-to-day basis. And so, I think sometimes we always wonder like, oh my gosh, why would God allow me to get sick? Why would God allow this to happen to me?

And again, I had to look at it and go, okay, well, these different things that happen might have not been my fault, but it is my responsibility to navigate through that. And so I was lucky enough in that to actually have a client of mine that was a rheumatoid arthritis specialist. And he jumped through all the different hoops with insurance companies and all of that to actually treat me. And he knew my background. And so he was very loving and being able to help me look at that of going, hey, if your body is indicating to you that you're tired, are you resting? Is if you, right, that was like a big thing. And I was very much still operating in performance, right? Of go, go, go, go, go.

And I remember a friend of mine at one point, cause I was managing and running salons and all of that, and he so kindly said, and I remember there was all these awards on my wall and there was no more room for an award, and he goes, is it good enough yet? And I had to really sit back and go, what am I doing all this for? Why is it that I have this need and like, yes, being ambitious is something that God put in me, and being tenacious is something God put in me, but I wasn't listening to my body through that journey. I didn't know and I don't like to call it necessarily balance, or like, you know, some people go, I just need to get more balanced in these different areas.

I just need to look at this. And I really look at it of like, it's a flow, right? It's a flow. If I'm in touch with my body of like, actually, I need some rest. Actually, I think also some of the key things too, we're learning about my body, learning about the different variants that our body is made up of. Maybe my parents passed something down to me that I'm unaware of. And that way, being able to meet my body and love myself where I was at, knowing what type of nutrition really worked well with me of like, do I need more vitamin A because I need more mental clarity? Or vitamin B because it really helps me in that category, right?

And so, through that journey, but again, working with specialists and working with people in that field, but also I just, really like to learn. Reading a lot of books, really going, okay, huh, if this is, if I'm having mental clarity issues, and I've seen the route of my life where I might've had focus issues or different things like that. And maybe a doctor tried to diagnose me with ADD or ADHD. Okay, well, what does that really mean? What's going on with my gut and what is going on with my vitamin and minerals? Am I deficient in something? And really starting at finding the root. I think that's the biggest thing.

We look at all these symptoms, we look at all this external stuff, but we don't maybe ask the question of have I considered what the root cause of this is? And if I've considered the root cause, and I'm finding it hard to find an answer to that, because don't go on the WebMD, that will send you on a giant rabbit hole. Been there, done that.

I love your workbook, because you always go to what's the root of this? If there's a root, how is my body responding and what does that mean? And how do I go ahead and meet myself in that place to navigate through that, to being able to have a healthier, happier life? And so that's been a lot of my journey of yes, I've done the work as far as the trauma so that I know that, hey, it's not my body just having a trauma response because for a long time, I couldn't differentiate the difference of being able to almost trust myself.

And so walking through the process of unpacking the trauma and really having the healing and renewal there, I'm now able to indicate, wait a second, no, this isn't a trauma response. This is actually my body telling me, hey, I need a little bit more rest and I need a little bit more nutrition.

Dr. Brook Sheehan (36:45)

Yeah, yeah, so good. And that's so beautiful. And like you said, you have to look for the root, as far as what's going on. And what Julie said, she unpacked a lot of trauma. So she knew there was some physical manifestations in terms of her symptomatology that was showing up. But things like emotions, un-dealt-with emotions that get stored in the body, our mental states, our spiritual states, sometimes our body's just yearning to be reconnected with that spiritual source. So you can't dismiss all of those. And I know the listeners who listen to the show all the time hear it.

Physical, spiritual, emotional, mental, they could probably just spout it off the top of their tongue without even thinking about it because they hear me say it so much. But yes, the human body is absolutely incredible. It houses things that we don't want it to house, and it houses things that God just designed it to house so beautifully, to keep us going and to have this incredible walk on this earth for the purpose that we've been given.

So I pray that all of you have been just so touched by this conversation and that you're just walking away just thanking God, thanking God for all the blessings that He's done in your life and is continuing to do, and then just taking one small step forward. So Julie, on that note, how can people connect with you? What's the best way that they can stay in touch?

Julie Conkle (38:08)

So you can always reach out to me on Instagram. My handle is @jewelseye314, so you can always reach out to me on Instagram and DM me for any questions that you have, if you're looking to get plugged in for an equine experience, ⁓ or even if you're just really trying to navigate your next steps, as far as what does a healthy life look like for me? That would be the best place to reach me and I look forward to hearing from any and all of you.

Dr. Brook Sheehan (38:18)

I love that. And I will put your handle and your Instagram page in the show notes so that they could click right on that. If you're driving in your car right now or you're out for a beautiful walk, don't worry about trying to, what did she say? It'll be right there for you in the show notes. So Julie, thank you so much for being here. For those of you listening, we will see you next week and have a very blessed, blessed week. Talk soon.

Julie Conkle (38:56)

Thank you.