The Lulu Essey Podcast
Welcome to The Lulu Essey Podcast—an unedited, unscripted dive into what it really means to do life your way.
This is a place for honest and vulnerable conversation and exploration. It’s an invitation to come as you are—no judgment, just the freedom to be fully you. This is an invitation to start embracing and loving the gloriously messy, magically magnificent parts of yourself!
Creating a life you love is built in small steps taken daily. My hope is that these conversations bring you the tools, inspiration, and self-belief to move forward with love and confidence.
The Lulu Essey Podcast
Consistency to Habits: The Missing Link & Getting Back After Failure
What happens the day after you break your streak? In this powerful follow-up to Episode 16, Lulu reveals the critical bridge between consistency and habits—and why understanding this distinction can save you months of frustration. Learn why habits take much longer to form than the popular "21 days" myth suggests (the science says 18-254 days!), and discover a practical 3-step comeback formula for those inevitable moments when you fall off track. Whether your meditation practice has stalled, your creative project is gathering dust, or your exercise routine has faltered, this episode gives you both the neuroscience and practical tools to rebuild momentum without shame. The path to lasting change isn't a straight line—it's an upward spiral where each loop, even the challenging ones, takes you higher than before.
Key Takeaways:
- The fundamental difference between consistency (conscious effort) and habits (automatic behavior)—and why confusing them leads to frustration
- Why the research-backed timeline for habit formation is 66 days on average (not 21)—and what this means for your expectations
- How the 15-minute promise naturally evolves as you grow, and why this evolution is a sign of success, not failure
- The 3-step comeback formula: Drop the story, start smaller than before, and track your return as a win
- Why the comeback day after a break is more important than any random day of showing up
- How the consistency journey resembles an upward spiral rather than a straight line
- Why the most disciplined people succeed not because they never miss, but because they return quickly
Chapter Timestamps:
00:00 - The Challenge of Breaking Consistency
03:06 - Recap of the 15-Minute Tiny Promise
05:11 - Consistency vs. Habits: The Critical Difference
07:41 - The Science of Habit Formation (Why "21 Days" Is a Myth)
10:14 - Evolution Beyond the 15-Minute Promise
14:23 - The Reality of Failure & How to Navigate It
16:19 - The 3-Step Comeback Formula
17:46 - Personal Example: Returning to Meditation After Surgery
19:16 - The Upward Spiral Model of Progress
20:44 - Preview of Next Week: Maintaining Motivation When Excitement Fades
Powerful Quotes:
"Consistency requires conscious effort, while habits happen automatically."
"The transition from consistency to habit isn't seamless—it's clunky and uncomfortable before it becomes automatic."
"The 15-minute tiny promise is a launchpad, not the destination."
"The most consistent people aren't the ones who never miss a day. They're the ones who know how to come back when they do."
"The day you return to your practice after a break is actually more important than any random day of showing up."
"The path of consistency is very seldom a straight line—it's more like an upward spiral where each loop takes you higher than the last."
Until next time, Beautiful Souls...
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