Rediscovering Her Spark: Vicky’s Menopause Journey at Work and Beyond

In this warm and inspiring episode, Alison sits down with Vicki Snell, HR Assistant at Chester Race Company, to explore how real conversations about menopause have transformed workplace culture.

Vicki shares her career journey, from barmaid to HR and offers a behind-the-scenes look at a female-led organisation that’s actively creating a more inclusive environment for people experiencing their menopause journey.

Together, we unpack how Chester Race Company identified the need for menopause awareness and education and how it sparked honest dialogue, lasting policy change and everyday workplace adjustments. From glass-walled offices and hot flushes to the freedom to wear sandals and bring notebooks into meetings, Vicki gives us real-life examples of what it means to feel seen and supported at work.

She also shares the ripple effects of the sessions, like team members recognising their own symptoms, feeling confident to speak to their GPs and using practical tools to manage brain fog in a fast-paced environment.

Following the workplace training, Vicki realised she was struggling with her own menopause journey and wasn’t getting the help she needed from health professionals. That moment of awareness led her to embark upon menopause coaching, which had a hugely positive impact on her personal wellbeing. Her story highlights the importance of not only raising awareness, but also providing the right support to take action.

This episode is full of empathy, energy and encouragement. Whether you're an HR professional, a leader, or someone navigating menopause at work, Vicki’s story shows just how powerful small changes and honest conversations, can be.

You can connect with Vicky on Linkedin - Vicky Snell | LinkedIn

🎧 Listen in and rediscover your spark—one real-life moment at a time

I'd love to connect with you on LinkedIn;

www.linkedin.com/in/⭐alison-allen-chartered-mcipd

Transcript

Episode 5 - Rediscovering Her Spark: Vicky’s Menopause Journey at Work and Beyond

[00:00:00] Are you or someone you know and love going through the menopause? If this is you low and welcome to find your Spark, real life menopause moments. I'm Allison and I'm excited to guide you through all things menopause. In this empowering podcast, we'll dive into honest conversations, share real life stories, and bringing guest insight to help you feel supported through every stage of the menopause transition.

Hello, and welcome to today's episode, Find Your Spark, Real Life Menopause Moments. And today I am delighted to be joined by Vicky Snell from Chester Race Company. Vicky, we've known each other for about a year now or so. For the purposes of the listeners, please can you introduce yourself? Yeah, of course.

Hi everybody. Uh, my name's Vicky. I am currently the HR assistant at Chester Race Company based at Chester Race Course. So, um, I'm not sure if [00:01:00] your listeners are aware of Chester Race Club. We are just in the midst of our 2025 season here at Chester. So busy, busy. So a bit of background. I started working here about seven years ago as a.

Barmaid. Um, and so I've worked all the way up through the ranks basically. So I started off as barmaid Zero, our contract, um, couple of days a week and now, yeah, HR assistant, so the HR team's quite small here. We've just had a bit of a restructure as well, so we're still recruiting for our team. There's.

The dynamics are really good. We're almost a full female team. We have one male that sits within our team at the moment, but predominantly the HR team is a all female team. Uh, we are led by a female CEO as well. So, um, we had a male c. CEO, uh, before her. So some of [00:02:00] the changes and things that she's been making are, are really good.

They're going down really well. Yeah, we're quite, quite a big, a big company. Um, we've not only got Chester Racecourse, we've got Bang Grand D race course, uh, muscle Borough Race Course with a new edition. And then we have Common Halls Street Social in Chester City Santa, and we have the Holiday Inn Express.

So yeah, quite a. Quite a vast company and, and we're ever expanding. Wow. Um, you know, when I came to Chester Race company last year, it is absolutely beautiful. As you can imagine being a race course, there's a lot of green array. The, um, the offices, the, the. The buildings. It's just beautiful. So if anybody gets the opportunity and enjoys racing, I would highly recommend going to visit the team there.

But yeah, it's, you work in a lovely, lovely surrounding, don't you? Oh, it's such a gorgeous place. [00:03:00] Um, our office building as well as a glass building, so we overlook the race course, which is really nice. So we get to see, um, what everybody else is up to when we can still see the sunshine and yeah, it's lovely.

Yeah, it certainly is. And with the weather that we've been having recently, it's even better. I mean, maybe not in a glass office, but it's certainly, it's a lovely, lovely building, um, and, and surroundings that you in. And you can, I mean, Chester in itself is beautiful, isn't it? So you can see all over Chester as well.

So, so if we go back about 12 months, something, well probably a bit longer than that. Obviously you, you were, you were in HR back then and, you know, just talk me through what were the, the reasons for, um, Chester Ray's company wanting to bring in menopause education sessions into the workplace? Um, there was quite a few reasons to be honest.

Uh, like I say, our team itself [00:04:00] are predominantly females. Um, there are. We're a bit half and half. There's a few of us are of a certain age, and a few of us are in our twenties and. Quite young based. Um, but then again, so our CEO, like I just mentioned, is female of a certain age. Um, it's a topic that has been discussed quite a lot within the race company and especially in, you know, our HQ as you were just saying.

Then we are a glass building and it gets very hot outside and when there's the hot flushes that are going on at the same time, it can be overwhelming, shall we say. Um, so. Around about the time that you came and see us. We'd employed a people and culture manager. So basically to look at the culture of our, our business, see what we're we are doing well, what we're not doing so well.

And menopause was one of the things that she explored. So again, of a certain age and was like, what if we [00:05:00] were to put in, um. First of all, she was a bit like, what policy do we have in place for menopause? And we were all like, huh. And again, I, I don't think I said this earlier, but I'm 42, so I'm classed on a bit of a younger side of menopause.

So it wasn't something that I had really delved into a lot either. So she asked where our policies were and we, at that point, we didn't have one. Um, she asked what our reasonable adjustments would be, again, for sitting in a glass building, um, uh, what kind of vibes we were getting from the office staff.

Has anybody ever asked for any adjustments for menopause? Um, and it just. It just brought up a big conversation really, to, to start with. Um, and then she introduced the prospect of having a menopause coach come in and, and talk to us about symptoms and, [00:06:00] um, how to manage those symptoms and how the workplace can help you with, you know, your brain fog, for instance.

And it, it was kind of just a way of. Do we need this? Um, do we need people to be aware of, you know, the person around the corner might actually be having a really bad day because they can't remember what they did 10 minutes ago. You know, that, that kind of thing. Um, it turned out that it was really, really well received, and actually a lot of people wanted to attend the coaching sessions and a lot of people actually got quite a lot out of it as well.

Mm-hmm. So we, we, uh, we ran two separate sessions, didn't we? From one for a colleague perspective, one from a manager and leader perspective. And I, I remember your, um, CEO actually sat in the, the leader one, which is great. You know, leading from the top, like you said. Uh, you know, everybody was, every, you could tell that everybody [00:07:00] was bought into it and everybody, it was really well received.

People wanted this. So from, from the, the sessions where we had the, the colleagues, we also had the leaders and managers, you said they went down, they were really well received. What, what happened following those sessions? You know, what changes were brought about or, you know, what conversations were going on?

Um, so we now have a menopause policy, which obviously, like I've just said, we didn't house before. So we have created a policy, um. It's basically just got people talking as well. So, uh, for instance, there is one lady, obviously, I won't name any names, but who works here, who was like, oh, now I know I'm not going mad.

And then somebody else, um, coming into the office and having like a summer kind of dress on and literally saying, you know, the conversations that we've had means that people are [00:08:00] aware that. You know, you can overheat in these kind of situations. And it made them think more about, less about what they needed to wear for work and more about how they would feel comfortable.

So she, for instance, she was like, oh no, I'd always wear a full suit. I'd always make sure that I'm presentable. I'd alway, I always make sure, you know, I've got proper shoes on. And on this day she literally had a undress on and some sandals. Um, and she was comfortable coming to work, dress. Dress like that.

So it's, it's definitely opened up. It's opened up the, the conversations. Um, and then I have actually sent the pack out to everybody that was provided with the checklist and things in which, um, another lady has actually taken to her GP as a, a marker for, I think I am perimenopausal and I think I am going through the menopause.

Fantastic. You know, so [00:09:00] it is not just a case of coming in into a a, an educational coaching session and leaving, it's having that lasting impression and impact on the organization and colleagues. So do you feel that it's source of like open giving people that, um, not permission, that's the wrong word, but it's given people the confidence to speak out?

Yeah, definitely. I think it's just having that, that dialogue as well, isn't it? So to be able to say, do you know what, I'm going through the menopause and this is, you know, taking a notebook into a meeting or taking, you know, asking if people can be recorded. Can I record this audio because my brain fog is too much at the moment.

Um, it conversations for myself and my husband. For instance, you know, the. He'll say to me, what are you doing tomorrow? And I'm like, um, I'll get back to you when I'm doing it because [00:10:00] I dunno, you know? Or I'll get home from work and he'll go, so what did you do say? And I can pull out my notebook and be like, this is what I've done.

Um, I think the confidence to take a piece of paper and a pen or to record teams, meetings, et cetera, is a big thing because, you know, for myself personally, I've come out of meetings and gone, what was that? Because I've the, you know, the whole brain fog, you, you just forget. Um, but it's definitely opened up the dialogue.

It's definitely made people go, God, it's hot in this office, or I'm freezing. You know, it's tricky in our office because we have a broad range of, of ages and. One half of the office is hotter than the other half as well. So it's as if the heating's on at the beginning of the office and by the time you get to the back of the office, there's no heating on.

Um, so people's tempera creatures anyway are a little bit all over the place as it is because of the air [00:11:00] con and the te the heating and stuff. But it's definitely brought about the conversation of, wow, was it hot in here or am I just having a menopause moment? So the word, the word menopause is mentioned a lot compared to how it used to be.

We did have males attend the sessions. You know, that is, I speak to many organizations who will say, oh no, we don't need to raise awareness of menopause because we're male dominated. And you know, I. My response to that always is, well, you know, males need to understand it because it, it has a personal impact on them.

Because if they have a female partner and the female partner is going through the menopause, it's going to impact their personal life and they can bring that into work. You know, if they've been up all night because the wife has been, you know, opening the windows, pissing the room. They're going to be shattered too, and that comes into the workplace.

Or it could be that they're impacted through because they want to support a colleague. You know, we need [00:12:00] to raise awareness with everybody, not just the individuals. It's directly impacting. So the fact that you had men attend, you know, it's again, that is bringing about that inclusivity and opening up the conversation because they will have that understanding of what colleagues are going through.

I. Yeah, don't get me wrong, it was quite tricky at times to get some of the male perspectives, but once they were in the room, they had a lot to say. There was a lot of, um, points of view, like you say. And we did highlight to them, you know, their partners, their mothers, their grandmothers potentially, um, their daughters, you know, and at the same time, their sons, you know, if their sons have a wife have.

F you know, female children, it doesn't just impact them, you know, it's their whole surroundings at the end of the day. And, you know, we could be declared, especially the catering company as male dominating, but actually we're run by a [00:13:00] female, you know? Um, and there are females within the catering team. And actually, if you look at the events business as a whole, so our whole events.

Management team are female. So you know, it, it's not just a case of, oh, that doesn't happen to me when we are pretty much like the HQ side of things is quite female orientated and you, you know, as the, the catering manager for instance, you need to be able to deal with everything that's going on and need to kind of go, okay, that that person.

Needs to take notes or I can't just go and tap that person on the shoulder and go, can you do X, Y, and Z for me? Because they won't remember it. Or, you know, they, they need adjustments, like that kind of thing. It's getting to know everybody as an individual, isn't it? You know what, because you know, there's a whole range of symptoms as we know, and we don't all in, [00:14:00] um, experience the same symptoms.

Getting to know, you know, especially as a, as a manager or leader, getting to know your team, getting to know the individuals, getting to know what works for them, what doesn't work for them, and, and tailoring the support accordingly towards them. And, you know, we've also got to be mindful that some individuals who are going through a menopause don't necessarily identify as a female.

So we've got to bring that side of inclusivity into, into our work workplaces and making sure that, again, everybody. Of menopause? Yeah, definitely. Um, I think a lot of people are still, you know, not quite as inclusive as they could be and, and presume that menopause is purely a female. Think and like you say, it, it does affect everybody on the outside kind of looking in.

You know, we may, we may not know that they're dealing with menopause situations because on the [00:15:00] outside it, it's different. Exactly. We've, we've, we've all got to have that awareness because, you know, it's not black and white, you know, it's impacts. Everybody at some point in some way or another, you know?

And, and also, I mean, we could go on and on, we can talk about premature menopause is, you know, when, um, you know, we, we did discuss that about managers. Um, you know, if a colleague goes to a manager and and says, you know, I feel that I'm menopausal. And, you know, there have been occasions, I'm not saying that Chester Race company at all, but there have been occasions where.

Colleagues have felt dismissed by managers, where managers have said to colleagues, you're too young, and colleagues have felt dismissed. You know? And we know that there are early menopause. There are premature menopause. That everybody needs to be aware of. So that brings me on nicely on to, to you. So when, when we [00:16:00] met, obviously you were quite a pivotal lead in in this project and we had many conversations and I.

Outside of the, the formal sessions that, that we ran, we had many chats and we, at that point you were quite curious about your own situation. Do you want to tell me about that? Yeah, so I think the, the main reason that I was kind of pioneering for the, the sessions, um. Was actually for personal use. So you know when, when I was told that you could come in and you could do some, some sessions with others and we, we would learn about menopause and we'd get kind of that information and.

Just that little bit of a backup, I think in my personal life, I was straight on it. I was like, yes, we need to get that, this lady in, we need to do this training, not just from a company perspective. And don't get me wrong, I, I am the background of all of this now. So the menopause, um, policy and stuff, I wrote it myself.

So I [00:17:00] had my youngest child nearly five years ago, so he'll be five next month from having him. I was experiencing. A range of things that I was like, what on earth is this? I am not okay. And I distinctly remember going to see the GP when he was horribly 18 months old and going. I am not okay. I do not believe that this is from having a baby.

I do not believe that this is symptoms of, you know, the whole, where they say it can take you two years to get your confidence back. It can take you two years to, to get over having a baby. I know that sounds really bizarre. Um, this is not it. So I was in tears. I couldn't string a sentence together. I was shaken, like physically shaken.

I was exhausted, um, for the GP to say to me. I think you might be slightly depressed. And I was like, okay, I'm not depressed. You know, [00:18:00] I've got three kids. I've got a full-time job. I've, you know, I, I'm not depressed. I have a anxiety related problem sometimes, but this just felt so much worse than this. Um, I wasn't sleeping.

I obviously, when you've got a newborn, you kind of think. Is it because I've got a newborn baby that I can't sleep? Um, but when, even when he slept, I didn't, I was having problems with my knees, so like the, the drinks in my knees constantly aching. I had hip problems. I'd get off off the safer and go to the kitchen.

I couldn't remember why I was there. It was, it was terrible. So the GP basically looked at me and was like, I don't think that there's anything wrong. Um, however, you know, we'll run some standard tests, I think that you have depression. Um, but I would just like to roll anything else out. So [00:19:00] again, I just felt dismissed by her, if I'm honest.

And it was just a case of, um, she's not really listening to what I'm, I've got to say. However, I'll go for the tests. Let's see what it brings up. So the tests themselves did actually bring up a deficiency, so a B12 deficiency and a vitamin D deficiency. When I went back to the gp, that's kind of all she focused on.

So all she focused on was the fact that I was deficient in things that I needed. I was then medicated for those things. Um, told to come back in six months whilst going through all of this. The symptoms just didn't get any better, and in fact, they just got worse. I kept ringing to say, I need to go back to see her, and she was like, no.

I've told her the follow up won't be for six months. So. You know, unless it's a new problem, we don't really wanna see her. It was all just very bizarre. I think I've used that word quite a lot, but I feel like the whole process was just really odd. It was like, okay, well we've medicated you for this [00:20:00] now we don't wanna see you for six months.

I, I was at a point where when you came in that I was like, I don't know what to do from here. You know, I've been trying to scale backwards and forwards. I've been trained to see a different gp, but because that one GP took on my case, they wouldn't let me see anybody else. And just a pure, this has to be anxiety and depression related, has to be stress related.

It has to be related to the fact you've just had a baby went on for probably 12 months and you, you were in a pretty desperate place, really, weren't you? Yeah. You felt that nobody was listening to you? Oh yeah. I was in a bad way, a really, really bad way. Um, as I said it to you at the time, I felt like I was going crazy.

I felt like I. My brain had just stopped functioning. I felt like I couldn't function properly. Um, I was having arguments at home because, you know, it was something as simple as I forgot that I was on pickup duty for the other kids. [00:21:00] So the school were ringing, going, who's picking your kids up today? And I'd just totally forgotten it was me.

Uh, yeah, I was in a bad way. And if you don't mind me asking, how, how old were you when, when you started noticing. I mean, you said earlier on that you're 42 now, so you were 41 when we met, but when you first started seeing these symptoms after your younger son was born. So I was 38 when he was born, um, 40.

And knowing what you know now, you know, you, you've done a lot of research, we've had lots of conversations. You know, back then you strongly believe that that was perimenopause. Oh yeah, a hundred percent. I believe that I have been going through perimenopause since I was 38, so almost five years. And you, you have the experience that so many, unfortunately, so many people have had where you dismissed, you're too young for this because you are.

[00:22:00] You know, you're, you're in your thirties, it can't possibly be happening to you. We know that the average age of menopause is 51, and the average age range is between 45 to 55. So if you are younger than that, very often you're dismissed, which you know it's wrong. We also know that menopause does affect people who are younger.

Between 10 and 15% of women experience an early menopause, which occurs between the ages of 40 to 45 and then younger than, that's premature menopause, which affects 1% of individuals. So by building awareness, it's breaking down that. It's that misunderstanding really, that it can't possibly be happening to you because you're 38 and again, you know, you've had the experience that so many people have had where you get that misdiagnosis, you must be depressed.

It must be anxiety. It's so easy to see why so many women end up going down that route of antidepressants, you know? And whilst you know, people may need antidepressants, [00:23:00] absolutely. They've got a place. But not everybody may do because it may be that the menopause is the reason for the underlying symptoms and, and how you are feeling, why you are feeling that way, not that you need antidepressants.

Yeah, I think it, for me, I was very much adamant that I didn't need antidepressants and I was very much, um, on the path of, I don't actually know what's wrong right now. But I'm not depressed, you know, that I feel like they use the fact that I had a young child quite a lot within the, the appointments and I was like, they were asking about, you know, support networks and how many nights off a week I get from having a a child.

And it was all very much tailored towards you have a young baby and obviously it was COVID at the time, so people were in lockdown. And obviously support networks weren't. Allowed at that point to a degree. So it was all a case of, oh, you know, a bit of a, [00:24:00] you're locked in the house with a newborn baby and homeschooling and it's all too much for you.

And I was like, it's not that. So I had all of the homeschooling, et cetera. I had it all managed. So we had a plan. We knew what we were doing. Yes, at times, you know, it could be a little bit chaotic, but who's not chaotic when you've got three kids in the house, two of them at different stages of their schooling lives, and then a baby at the same time.

So, you know, things, life does get a little bit like that sometimes, but I've, I was very adamant that I wasn't depressed and I think it, it's easy for others to maybe have just gone, okay, yeah, maybe I am depressed and. Actually those things that that GP who's had all of that training and has all of that knowledge is saying could be right.

Whereas I was. I think you've, you've seen I am quite a determined person and at that point I was like, I am telling you I am not [00:25:00] depressed. Um, whereas some people may not have that confidence to, to tackle, you know, like I say, a medical professional that has gone to university and has had to study for so long, they may not have had that confidence to go no.

So when did you start looking into thinking, actually this could be perimenopause? Um, it was after the chat with you actually, the first day that you came in. I was, I asked for a little chat after the, the meeting and I was like, I think I remember saying to you, I have three quarters of those symptoms.

Like this is me. We had that, that conversation of it was a bit of a light bulb moment of actually this is it, this a hundred percent, is it, and I've probably gone through 12 months of this before you came into the business. Again, it comes [00:26:00] back to the raising awareness because once the weren't, the awareness is out there.

The amount of people that I've spoken to over the years, whether when I was in corporate career, since I've set upon, um, working for my own business, the amount of conversations I've had where people have said to me, flipping it, that's me. You know, and, and then gone on to to learn more about it, get the right support for them.

So, you know that, that we're going back a year now and then. Over the months we, you know, we'd have the occasional conversation and keep in touch and then to in, I think it was in the summer last year, I contacted you. Um, so, so summer 2024 to say that, um, as a qualified coach, I was then furthering that to become a menopause coach, a menopause specific coach.

So, um, and I was doing my qualifications and as part of my qualification, I needed two [00:27:00] clients to take through the coaching program. So you immediately sprung to mind and, and we had a conversation about, about that, and you snapped my hand off. Yes. Yes. So tell me, tell me a bit about, about that then, how you found the experience.

Because from, um, you know, it is a, it was, we worked together for about seven, eight weeks. Yeah. Over a period of time, not every, necessarily, every week we worked around your availability and what, um. 'cause life, life has to go on and you've got a very busy career and three kids at home. And um, you know, we worked through a program where we, we took you through your own coaching program, but then also brought into it, you know, elements of, of wellbeing and how, what you could do to.

To increase your awareness, but then also increase your awareness of menopause, but then also increase your awareness of these are holistic and self-help techniques that I can do to, to [00:28:00] help you in every aspect of, of going through that experience. Yes. So it's obviously when you contacted me, um. And asked if there was anybody within the business or if I wanted to do it myself.

I was like a hundred percent. So I went to speak to our head of HR and I was like, I, from a personal point of view, I need to do this. I feel like I have that our. Like you said, like you say, it wasn't every week, unfortunately. Um, but I feel like I can spare that time, and even if I had to do it in my own time, I would've gone ahead with it anyway.

Um, but they were really supportive and actually were like, okay, so you need to take that time away and go and do that, which was really good because some companies would've probably said, well, if you're willing to do it in your own time, then off you go and do it after work. Um, but they were really good and they, they let me take that time out too.

To meet with you. So I think from my point of view, we looked at my caffeine intake, um, we looked at [00:29:00] my water intake, we looked at some relaxation and um, exercise routines and kind of had a look at how, you know, drinking so much caffeine can. Make you tired more than actually keep you awake. So we had a lot of discussions about how, you know, some people drink coffee to keep them awake, and then it gets to that point where it has the adverse effect and it actually makes you go to sleep.

Um, we talked about, you know, limiting caffeine intake and replacing that with. Uh, I think we, we talked about like fruit teas and, and things that were less caffeinated and having a look at like the sleep tea and kamai in and things that could help, like peppermint with digestive issues and things like that too.

To kind of balance me out a little bit, um, we looked at the fact that I only would drink tea and coffee throughout the workday, for instance, and now I have a massive water bottle [00:30:00] on my desk that is full every day and it's. By the end and I really refill it. Um, we looked at obviously how I could increase my activities and we, we spoke about how I am actually quite active.

I do, uh, for the listeners, I do walk for 40 minutes to get to work every day. I then do that same walk home. Um, I do the school run as well, um, on my way to work and I do the school run on my way home from work and. I don't feel like I sit down that much compared, bearing in mind I do work an office job, so it is easy isn't it, to, to sit down all day and not actually pace the office.

So I do have a little regular reminder of have you moved yet? You know, have you gone somewhere that isn't the kettle? Have you gone for a walk on your lunch break? Um, I've tried to get away from my desk and actually get some sunlight that's not just coming through the window when I go for my lunch. We had a look at a balanced diet, so I started to make [00:31:00] my own lunch and bring them into work.

Um, even though we are provided with a lunch, so sometimes I'd be like, oh, I'm really fancy that, so I'm gonna make my own and bring it in. I think a lot of my problems were, like I say, the caffeine intake and the brain fog. Hot flushes. I'm not too bad with every now and again I'm like, geez, is it hot in here?

But the hot flushes weren't my main concern. I think the brain fog was my main concern to begin with and the anxiety. So I found it really helpful when we, we looked at like breathing exercises and we talked about some yoga, for instance, and I said about some club size classes to, to increase that activity so it's not just walking to work every day, although.

That that helps as well. And we looked at my step intake and things like that, and I do do probably 20,000 steps most days. So we, we figured out that I am active, but maybe my core need is a little bit of work on, and like you say, yoga and Pilates [00:32:00] and breathing exercises really helped with the anxiety.

So really helped me to kind of focus on what it was that I was anxious about and how to kind of. Breathe through that. It really helped me going into meetings and I think I said to you at the beginning that I am terrible at meetings. I really don't like them. And now in my role as HR I, I have back to back meetings some days.

So sometimes it is just a case of having that quick breathing exercise, even if it is just while you're going into the loo, to get yourself back on that straight and narrow, you know, just some. Sometimes it only takes 30 seconds, doesn't it? To, to refresh your brain and to go, right. Okay. So we've moved on from that meeting now.

Now it's time for this one. Yeah. The, the whole process for me was just brilliant. It made me so much more confident. It made me look at my symptoms and go, actually, I've got headache today. Is that menopausal? How much water have I drank? And it really does make you [00:33:00] think, is that a menopause symptom? Or is it that, you know, I've not drank enough water.

My diet's been a bit terrible today, so I do feel tired. I've not had much sunlight, so my vitamin D isn't gonna be as high as it could be. And it, it did make me look at everything, not just specifically from a menopause point of view. Like, am I feeling like this because of X, Y, and Z, or is it actually my menopause symptoms?

Brilliant. You know, and when we started working together through, through the coaching. Program I asked you what your ultimate goal would be. Can you remember what that was? It was, my goal was to, I might not remember this word for word, but it was to wake up and feel refreshed. It was to have confidence in myself and it would, and it was to challenge and to eventually go on.

To get onto that right path for treatment, for the menopause, um, and have all of that [00:34:00] background information that I could take to a GP and go, no, this is it. And I think the main thing that stood out to me, certainly at the beginning was, was that confidence to challenge and that throughout, not necessarily that you're not, that you weren't a confident person, but it was the confidence to, to stand up and say, you know.

Yes, I, you know, this is menopause. And also the confidence, like you were saying about meetings and, and things like that by working together over that period of weeks, I said to you many occasions, it was like, it was visible, the confidence that you, I. That grew throughout that period, you know, whether, obviously, you know, it's not all down to, to the meetings that we had, but you know, it's, as you said, working on yourself throughout that period of time.

Taking away the information and the, what we discussed within the [00:35:00] sessions and then applying it, but also you were doing a lot of work on yourself as well, you know, and, and it was. Tangible the difference in you. When we used, when we were meeting, I could see it growing on a week by week basis. Did you feel that as well?

Yeah, definitely. I feel like the task that we went through, um, about decluttering, um, that really, really helped. And we spoke about the fact that it didn't have to be. A declutter as in let's take loads of stuff out of your house and, and sell it. It was more a case of a, do you need to be subscribed to those emails?

And I took for the first time ever my emails and teams off my phone while I was on annual leave. Um, and it, that was a big step for me. And I think once I'd actually done that, I was like, okay. I am a, a different person. I mean, I'm not obviously a different different person, but my [00:36:00] confidence to go, actually I'm not gonna answer that work call because I'm on annual leave or that email can't wait until I get back because I do have an out of office on that tells you that I'm not due back to work until Tuesday.

Um, I work in the past, I've never done that, so I've put an out of office on, but then I've still checked while I've been out of office. I think steadily it did rise steadily. But then at some point it was a bit of a light bulb moment of I've just done that. And I, and I think that was that moment where I was like, do you know I'm on an annual leave?

I've got three kids. We are gonna go and do something fun and no, I am not gonna check my phone. Um, and uh, yeah, I think that for me was the point where I was like, okay. I can do it. Actually, you need, you need a break, don't you? And you know, many people think, regardless of whether there's menopause in the mix or not, but so many people think [00:37:00] I'm better at my job, or I'm a better employee if I'm 24 7.

Yeah, definitely. The reality is, if you put yourself 24 7, you're going to reach points of burnout. You are going to be stressed. Going at a period of prolonged stress brings along cortisol into into the hormonal mix. And we discussed this throughout working together, but cortisol, when it's present in our body, inhibits the production of other hormones.

So if you think your oestrogen is all over the place, your progesterone and testosterone are on decline, then we bring cortisol into the mix. 'cause we're feeling so stressed over a prolonged period that inhibits the production of those hormones. So really we're, we're exacerbating our menopause symptoms.

And even without menopause, you know, we're not machines and we can't continue being this 24 7 individual that [00:38:00] sometimes some people think is what it's the right thing to do and it's expected, you know, so taking, we have lots of conversations about that and how it was impacting you and how you were, you weren't really taking a break, were you?

Um, no, not at all. So even when, so trying to get the kids ready for school in the mornings, I'm on my phone at the same time as trying to, you know, iron their trousers that they've crumbled up in the corner because they forgot to fold on the night before. Or, you know, making a lunchbox while replying to an email or I'm on the phone literally to somebody while I'm trying to put shoes on the, on the kids.

And then the same, so I'd even respond. To emails and things outside of my office hours. So some nights I was working till 7, 8, 9 o'clock in the evenings when at that time, actually I'm meant to be doing the tea and, you know, bathtime and bedtime. And not that the kids ever felt like they were neglected, but at the same time, you know, I, I wasn't a hundred [00:39:00] percent there reading their bedtime story because I was thinking that that person's probably responded to me now because I've already responded to them.

So now I need to check what they're saying. And it's the pressure that you put on yourself, isn't it? Because it's, you know, it's not an expectation. And you know, when we were discussing it, it certainly wasn't something that your managers and your teams expected of you. It was this expectation and.

Demands that you'd put on yourself. Yeah, it was something that I felt like I needed to do and sometimes I, I said to you during the sessions, I check my work emails on my way to work purely to see what I was walking into. And again, definitely not expected by the company. It's just something that I always did.

So. In some aspects, some people did expect me to reply to their emails as soon as they'd sent it. But again, it wasn't a, it wasn't an expectation of our workplace. And actually our CEO [00:40:00] was very much a case of WeWork, nine till five, and that's it. So, stop working. Um, when she got wind of the fact that I was sending emails at 7:00 AM or 7:00 PM she, she weren't, she went bonkers.

You know, we, we are here to do a job. We're not here. To, you know, we don't, we work when we don't breathe the racecourse. We, we have children, we have, she has a dog, she doesn't have children, but, you know, that kind of thing. We, we have to have a life outside of here. Um, but yeah, pressure that I put on myself was clearly exasperate in my symptoms as well.

So it was, it was a case of I need to look at the whole picture of me and see where I can go from here to. To help myself really. So fast forward to the end of the coaching program. Did you achieve your goals? Yeah, um, so it's been a learning curve, so [00:41:00] I've since changed gps. So the GP that I had has retired.

The process has kind of gone back to the beginning, but in a much shorter time. So he's done all of the testing again, the efficiencies that I have. We're back on medication for those things. Um, I now have a final set of tests before he will prescribe HRT. However, he has told me that I can have that HRT as soon as those results come back.

So it is literally gonna be a case of I have the test on the Tuesday and I could be on that by the Friday. So, although I'm not medicated yet, and definitely on that journey too. Getting the end result is with what I wanted. And like we said previously, my confidence to challenge and claiming my mind of all of those other things that have been going on has really, really helps.

Um, kind. I've come on leaps and bounds. We really have. And you know, and it is all the work that [00:42:00] you have put in, um, you know, and the determination, the resilience, and the confidence. Like I said, I've seen it, I've physically seen it grow over the, the months that we work together. So what's next? Uh, so as a company, we're looking to implement menopause champions within the workplace.

We. Signposting people to the right port networks. And again, like I say, we've got the policy in place now as well. We are trying to make the office space a bit more reasonable for some people. Like I say, because we work in a glass office, it can be quite tricky. Um, we're, we are looking at moving out of this office, to be fair, um, we've got a bit of a long term plan within the company.

We are looking at what reasonable adjustments we can put in place. I've seen some really cool little fans that you plug into your laptop, for instance, that I think would go down a treat for quite a lot of us, especially this summer. And then they're really, [00:43:00] really cheap. They're not expensive. I think that could be a company cost that we provide, those kind of things.

But for me it's just to keep working on myself really just to, to get all of these tests out of the way to get the HRT. On and active and then, you know, potentially share my story a little bit as well within, within the team and within the company. We do a lot for International Women's Day, that kind of thing.

Um, maybe for the next menopause day we can do something where people share their stories or I. You know, we need to just champion it that little bit more, get more of the men involved. I think you've got an amazing story to tell and you know, I think that it would be wonderful for, for your colleagues, you know, and wider to, to hear your story.

Absolutely. You know, and, and as you say, it's champion championing the fact that originally you felt dismissed, but you've got where you want to now [00:44:00] and. Your focus was to get on the right treatment plan and after research and making a decision based on the facts of, of what, um, preferred treatment option of HIT.

You've researched, you've looked at the facts, you've discussed it with your gp. You believe that's the right treatment option for you. You know, and I am over the moon that you've got to the place that you are aiming to be in. Thank you so, so much for joining me today. I am sure that the listeners will absolutely love your story.

If you've got one word of advice for anybody listening, what would it be? That you have to champion yourself, that keep going, keep pushing. Even if you, you feel like you are bugging somebody, just keep going. Thank you so much for joining me today, Vicky, and um, I'll see you soon. Thank you so much for listening to find your [00:45:00] Spark, real life menopause moments.

If you'd like to learn more, visit www.sparkshr.co uk. Please share this episode with others, navigating their Menopause Journey or supporting someone through it. Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review. Your feedback helps us to spark, change and connect with more people. Let's keep the sparks alive and continue this journey together.