we are NOT the SAME
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we are NOT the SAME
We Have No Idea When Someone Is Flirting With Us
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Ever found yourself completely clueless about whether someone is flirting with you? You're not alone! We're diving headfirst into the complicated world of flirtation, armed with hilarious dating app screenshots and our own awkward experiences.
From finger-in-mouth disasters to decoding the subtle art of eye contact, we explore why 72% of people can't tell when someone's interested in them. We take a personality quiz that reveals our flirting styles (physical, playful, polite, sincere, or traditional) with some surprising results—turns out one of us scores much higher on the flirtation scale than expected!
The conversation takes fascinating turns as we examine how differently men and women perceive flirting signals. Men often view mutual gaze as a sexual invitation while women see it as general interest. We discuss how men tend to "peacock" their accomplishments while women focus on appearance, and why being "too nice" when rejecting someone's advances can backfire spectacularly.
Between fits of laughter, we unpack the balance between vulnerability and mystery, how comfort levels affect flirting ability, and why our facial expressions often betray our words. Whether you're a confident flirt or someone who thinks everyone's just being friendly, you'll find yourself nodding along and laughing at our dating misadventures.
Hit that follow button, leave us a five-star review, and join our community of listeners navigating the hilariously complicated world of human connection. Your face might say "cringe," but we promise your heart will say "thank you!"
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Speaker 1my name is heather, I'm lacy and we have such a fun episode coming to you today. It's gonna be fun we've been chatting already, even though we're not supposed to we really suck at that.
Speaker 2We're always like, okay, anytime it's a pod day, don't say anything to me, and then we spend like at least an hour just fucking chatting before we start like, what time is it?
Speaker 1yeah, it's definitely 40 minutes over since you've been here yeah, yeah all right. All right, well, we have some. Well, we had some tea to spill, which maybe we'll be telling you guys so many things slip, things happen. There's been some juicy new developments.
Speaker 2Maybe not juicy, there's developments, maybe it is I think it depends on how you look at it it is.
Speaker 1It is okay, but our topic today is flirting, yeah, and all the things that go into it. So I did download, re-download um hinge and facebook dating for material, because we have really funny things for material, like not even interest no, it actually is not it was fully, and I'm just like see us on a dating site.
Speaker 2Please know that we're never, we're never gonna meet in person. No, we might talk a little bit. Oh, I don't even talk, I just screenshot just the initial comment.
Speaker 1You never ones, no, because I'm like, oh, this is gonna be good I try because, like part of me really wants to, but I'm too.
Speaker 2I do not have time today.
Speaker 1Let's be real also. It's a waste of your time.
Speaker 2It is a waste of my time because I want a very specific thing yes yes, I want a very specific thing and it just does not exist around here. So, but I so I'll start a conversation and then, like the second, they want to meet. I'm like ugh, you're like not fun anymore.
Speaker 2No, because I feel in my world there is a lack of flirting, but like I don't know, I got older and it stopped. Part of it, I'm sure, is. I don't drink very much. I don't put myself in environments where people can actively do that type of stuff but, like even on the dating sites, mine is very bland compared to what you get.
Speaker 1Should we just jump in and share some? Yeah okay, these are screenshots from, like the initial messages that people can send you. This is just from the last five minutes that I've opened it. Shut up, seriously. Yeah, these are the ones that I just got since I opened it. Remember I redownloaded it and we started laughing. Oh wow, hello there, darlin, that smile is very radiant. Just wanted to let you know that. What is something about yourself that you used to take for granted, but you now have a new appreciation for?
Speaker 2see, I do like that. He at least like asked a question to try to create a conversation I feel like that's a good. That's a good way to flirt like, say, your cheesy line, because then hopefully you'll get a little chuckle. That's it. Do you think cheesy lines are cute or annoying it?
Speaker 1depends. I honestly like don't get approached, besides the weird shit like this, and it's like um, not flattering, because it's like I see where it's coming from and i'm'm like, oh, you wouldn't, you're just shooting a shot because you're behind a computer screen.
Speaker 2Yeah, maybe I'm just like so you feel it hits different if it's in person versus if it's?
Speaker 1Yes, I don't think that I would ever. I don't know, I don't like the Internet shit, because I just think it's. I'm all about actions, so I would rather you this sounds weird Just stalk me and find me in person and shoot your shot in real life. Don't actually do that.
Speaker 2That is literally how you found your last one. He stalked me, he stalked you.
Speaker 1I know.
Speaker 2And found you, and that didn't work out well for you. So maybe we should change our tactics.
Speaker 1Okay, well, maybe I just shouldn't be on these sites for just for entirely, entirely, um, it's, I'm the one that's doing it wrong, because I don't have any pure interest. I'm just doing it for podcast material, so maybe that's where I'm fucking up. So anyway, here's another one. I hope your day is going as beautiful as you are. That's definitely as standard. Um, I'm just feeding my cows and heading down to the boat and rock for bay. Would you like to join? Now, that wasn't as bad. Those ones weren't bad, those ones were just ones that, um, and then there's a lot of women right there.
Speaker 2I find offense to that that's fair, because that could be taken different ways oh, it was. I think it's like a it was on in regards to a picture of me with my muscles do you have like a specific time that someone flirted with you that like sticks out in your mind, is like a positive experience?
Speaker 1Oh my gosh I'm going to have. Um, let me think about this.
Speaker 2That was a long pause.
Speaker 1No, because, like, I feel like I don't have a lot of like experience, right Because, luke, we were just together for so long, sure, and then I flirted with you regardless I don't know if I picked it up as flirting that's fair. I just think everybody wants to be friends yes, I understand that.
Speaker 2And then I'm like, oh wait, what I don't know when someone is flirting with me at all like I guess I can kind of pick it up.
Speaker 1But sometimes in the beginning, like I am, just like I love friends and the majority of my friends have been males throughout my life, with my brother's friends. And just like I don't know. I've just been around more males. I have a lot of female friends too.
Speaker 2So you're just used to people saying that. I think what you're saying is you're just used to people flirting with you so much that you don't realize that that's not what that is. Is that what it is? I?
Speaker 1think or maybe I just assume no one's flirting with me, besides things like this um because this is more blatant.
Speaker 2I think that's part right. If if you're being subtle, I am unaware like, and then if you're being aggressive with your flirting, I am panicked.
Speaker 1Yeah, there's no, in between it's either we're friends. It's not going to go well either way we're going to be friends or you're getting the wrong idea. No, do you think I lead people on then? Do you think that my friendliness comes across as accepting the flirt? Yes, Shit.
Speaker 2I also think that they may interpret your overall bubbliness as you flirting back.
Speaker 1Yes, Okay, I have gotten feedback from people that like, see me in the gym a lot and then, like they've seen my socials and they're like you look really scary and intimidating and I don't want to talk to you. And then I talk to you and you're really nice. I'm like that's just my like resting gym face. I don't feel like I. I feel like I'm so nice and bubbly, but maybe if you've never spoken to me, you don't know that well, and I feel like, okay, if, if their interaction is while you're lifting fucking weights oh yeah, sometimes I'm like fuck yeah, like you, like you're not.
Speaker 2I've seen some of the exercises you do. I can't imagine that you're going to have an approachable face on in that moment.
Speaker 1No, I'm either crying or I look like I'm going to snap you in half.
Speaker 2At least you have a reason. I'm just not approachable. That's one of the things I love about you.
Speaker 1I'm like she won't like you, don't worry, she only likes me, it's bad, like I don't know.
Speaker 2I remember one of my really good friends, tammy. She hated me when she first met me and I was like why? And she's like, honestly, your face. I was like what the fuck? Because your face looks like that. She's like you look like such a bitch. And then she's like and you're like the sweetest person I never got that about that.
Speaker 1She's like you look like such a bitch and then she's like and you're like the sweetest person. I never got that about you. That's good. I wonder if, because we were just like destined to be best friends from the beginning, I always felt just super comfortable with you.
Speaker 2Yeah, day one.
Speaker 1Yeah yeah. We literally started hanging out almost immediately. Here I am with all my shit and my crazy ass personality here. Here we go.
Speaker 2I feel like we met and we were hanging out within days, yes, and like all the time, anytime that we could, as soon as we realized we lived like a block and a half.
Speaker 1We're like this is it, this is it.
Speaker 2And then our boys, we have chosen, you are the one but remember janessa said that like we were like, destined to be friends like in past lives and all the things so yeah so maybe that is why because, like I, to me you will always just be bubbly barbie, like now you're bubbly bodybuilder barbie. That's a lot of b's. I was like, hold on, I have to pronunciate this, so I don't fucking bubbly barbie bubbly bodybuilder barbie. Yes, you really hard to say bubbly bodybuilder, barbie, it is hard but to me you've always been that.
Speaker 2But so like I don't know, I I feel like I can tell more if someone is flirting with me, if I know them more as like a person. But like if a stranger comes up to me, even if they're like buying me a drink or something, obviously I don't drink anymore, but like back then, like I wouldn't think anything of it and I just take my drink and walk away. And so now, like self-reflecting later, I was like how many people thought I was an absolute asshole because I'm clueless?
Speaker 1It's your autism.
Speaker 2I don't understand social cues. It's a disorder.
Speaker 1But like I wouldn't know, I wouldn't know, I don't know, and the ones who are mean to you? You're like, I love you.
Speaker 2I know.
Speaker 1Social cues Autism. There was this time. You got them mixed up.
Speaker 2There was this time. Me and my sister went to Curly's for New Year's and it was packed. There was nowhere to sit, and I'm a sitter. I want a fucking place to like. You want a seat? Yes, all the time, even at a concert, I want a seat, like. I will stand up for most of it.
Speaker 1But you want a seat?
Speaker 2I want a fucking seat. You want the option, I want the option, yes. So of course we find this gentleman who's like sitting by himself at a big old table and we're like, hey, are you by yourself? And he's like yeah, and we're like, can we sit at your table? Because I wanted to fucking sit and he was a nice enough guy. He let us sit. Whatever, we're drinking together, we're talking whatever, and I'm not super like aware that he's getting flirty until jen tells me. And then I was like oh, okay, like, so now I'm paying attention to it. And he like wants to sit close to me and whatever. And then I yawn and he stuck his fucking finger in my mouth. What? And I lost Wait why is that appropriate?
Speaker 2Why is that flirting? That is disgusting.
Speaker 1Where has your hand been?
Speaker 2I don't know.
Speaker 1Also, I don't want anyone's finger in my mouth. No, not even my own.
Speaker 2I was mortified. My sister's like your facial expression changed so fast. I have autism and I would not stick my finger in your open mouth.
Speaker 1The mental battle was was like don't do it, don't do it, don't do it.
Speaker 2I did it, I did it his intrusive thoughts fucking won, but I was so why would you do that?
Speaker 1what is that? Was he mortified, I don't know? Like a hole, I'm gonna stick my finger in it.
Speaker 2Yeah, that's so fucking weird and then to watch the girl literally go from like to like fuck you. And he still asked me for my phone number after that and I'm like no absolutely fucking not no, I don't even want to sit anymore.
Speaker 2No I'm like, that's like invade, I don't know you that is so invading my space and so I'm like in my brain I'm like that cannot be flirting, like listen, I know I can't tell a lot, I am getting better like someone rubs my shoulders. Now my thought is, maybe this is flirting. It doesn't even go straight to this absolutely is, but it does at least think. Maybe it is versus like 10 years ago and I'm surprised you let somebody touch you I know I don't, I don't like it. I'm like when does it?
Speaker 1ever get to them rubbing your shoulders.
Speaker 2I have never witnessed I do it for other people, not for myself. I know when I hug you you're like cringe and everything in you repels back.
Speaker 1But it's fine, I still do it. It hurts my feelings a little bit on the inside, but I still do it.
Speaker 2I don't mean hey, you know when I'm having a really shit day though, because if I initiate the hug, you're almost like oh no, what happened?
Speaker 1uh, what are we doing here?
Speaker 2you're like, she's like voluntarily giving up emotion like what is happening okay, but so the whole thing, though, is that brings up that apparently there are five flirting styles, and one of them is physical. Oh yes, I feel like that's a dangerous slope for anybody like. Don't physically flirt with me yeah, what is physically flirting?
Speaker 1what are examples? Examples of like just touching.
Speaker 2That's what I thought.
Speaker 1OK, that's where my brain goes to, I feel like If I really like the person already, but they know like we're already comfortable.
Speaker 2So like second level flirt, like you've already pre-established a talking relationship with this person.
Speaker 1Like you know, walk by you hand, touches your back or I grab you lightly, things like that.
Speaker 2That's fair. I feel like that makes sense when you're flirting within your own relationship, which I do think is very important. Yes, I do think that you should continue to flirt with your partner throughout your entire relationship.
Speaker 1So I'm just awkward AF at flirting. Yeah, do we have? We have this quiz if we're a good flirt or not. So we're gonna take. I I'm just gonna say right now I'm just awkward, because then I'm like I'm awkward until, like, I know that because you don't have to be because you look like that I feel like shoot your shot baby, you're gonna be fine.
Speaker 2It's a layup for you.
Speaker 1I don't understand that I always sit back and let the person come to me yeah, I do that too because I don't want to bother someone who isn't interested.
Speaker 2It is the same reason that I will not make a phone call because I don't want to burden you with my presence even if the job of the person answering the phone is their actual job.
Speaker 2It's their job. I feel bad, but like, if you call me, then you want to speak to me, so that's fine, I can answer and we can talk on the phone, but me calling you, no, no, no, not, unless I have to the point where, if I do call someone, their immediate response is what's wrong, because I don't do it. Facts, facts. So that's the same reason. Like I don't approach, like I'm like if they're interested, they will come to me, and if they're like, I don't want to inconvenience someone by letting them know that I'm interested. If they're not interested, I get it. Yeah, I get it. Okay, we're going to take this quiz on the podcast.
Speaker 1Like we did not preemptively read the questions. Nope, we both have our phones here.
Speaker 2We're both doing it together.
Speaker 1And I say that I am not a good flirt. Oh, is that the first question? No, no, I'm just saying like, like in general. I'm just saying flirting personality type of mine is going to be like awkward, it's just, that's what it is.
Speaker 2I don't think that's one of the options. I think the options are physical, playful, polite, sincere and traditional. It says physical flirts use body language. Playful flirts think it's a game Definitely not that. Polite flirts are cautious. I think I am a polite flirt um polite flirts, or cautious I think I am a polite flirt um sincere flirts. Look for authentic connection. I think that's you, and then traditional flirts rely on conventional.
Speaker 1Okay, mine will be either that one or authentic yeah the connection so authentic or traditional? Yes, yeah, okay, and mine is definitely polite oh, so sincere, or that's what I think mine are going to be Okay.
Speaker 2Question number one.
Speaker 1I can tell if the person I'm flirting with is interested. Disagree, okay, I want to say I would say like somewhat agree.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1But I can also ignore it.
Speaker 2I am oblivious.
Speaker 1Okay, okay, I smile when I flirt.
Speaker 2I slightly agree.
Speaker 1I mean, I smirk now smile when flirting, I often oh fuck, yes, toss your hair.
Speaker 2That's my signature move, because I have anxiety and it's like my own built-in fidget spinner. I feel like I don't. So no, you don't, because you don't want to mess up your hair.
Speaker 1Yeah, I'm like my extensions. Don't like to be flailed around, so mine, which is so funny because literally mine is not in an attempt to flirt.
Speaker 2I don't like to be flailed around, so mine which is so funny because literally mine is not in an attempt to flirt. I don't use it for that manner. It's literally to give my hand something to do you just all the time toss your hair, yeah toss and twirl. I do a lot of twirling it's more of a twirl, but then I'll go like that and then I'll grab from the other side and then we're seeing flirting 101 by lacy.
Speaker 1I love it, it's not meant.
Speaker 2It's just because I'm anxious. So maybe it's not because I'm scared to flirt. No, it is me trying to flirt, but like I'm not doing that specifically as an attempt.
Speaker 1Yes, it's just, that's the one that comes out.
Speaker 2It's an involuntary reaction to my nervousness that I'm trying to flirt because I know I'm not good at it you're good at it I don't know what to say you just twirl your hair and look pretty I find myself laughing when I flirt.
Speaker 1Yes, I agree yes, big time agree uh, when flirting I make more eye contact than unusual conversation.
Speaker 2No contact makes me so uncomfortable.
Speaker 1Don't, don't heather, don't just in case you want to know, I'm staring very awkwardly at her and I'm not breaking any eye contact I'm not looking at you, I can't.
Speaker 2Next question I literally can't. Others often don't realize when I am trying to flirt with them. I yes slightly. I don't know, you don't know if someone knows that you're flirting. I feel like their body language or language back to you would make you realize that okay, yeah you just don't do it a lot no anymore. No, you there when we were in our spiral, okay yeah, mutually agreed upon destruction of our lives um. You were flirty then, yeah I was alcohol involved.
Speaker 1Yeah, to do anything I'm like give it, no one cares. No, um, yeah, no, I would say, yes, I could, I can read, and then, yes, trying to flirt with them. Okay, I ask people questions about themselves to draw them out in conversation. I need to get better at this.
Speaker 2Yeah, I'm going to do neutral because I get nervous about like what to ask, because I don't want to ask the basic questions, because you don't learn anything about a person by asking them like basic questions. But you got to like get in, to get to a point where you can ask like more serious questions and I get I don't know what makes sense to like what are your ask?
Speaker 1I have been asked lots of random questions and I'm like, oh, these ones are good. Um, it was vicky a long long time ago. She's like I always end up asking him what their red flags are. I'm like I would love to ask that.
Speaker 2That's a great question um just be like so what are your, what are your relationship?
Speaker 1green flags and what are your relationship red flags?
Speaker 2yes, I did put green flags on my dating profile because I was like I need to look at this different. Instead of saying what I don't want, let me say what I want yeah, that's good.
Speaker 1Yeah, did it help.
Speaker 2No, because I'm not interested Okay.
Speaker 1Okay. I frequently touch the person I'm flirting with in some way, such as on the arm.
Speaker 2No.
Speaker 1That's so funny.
Speaker 2We should do it one, two, three, answer it together. That's hilarious.
Speaker 1I find myself speaking in softer tones when flirting no.
Speaker 2No, I find myself speaking in softer tones when flirting. No, I don't ever find myself speaking in softer tones.
Speaker 1Others say. Others would say I'm cheerful when I flirt. I feel like I'm always cheerful. I mean, I'm fucking tigger.
Speaker 2I'm going to go with neutral. With neutral because I feel like I'm not naturally an overly bubbly person. Yeah, and I can be in moment of when I know people. If I feel comfortable in a situation, then yes, but like if I'm around strangers, no, no.
Speaker 1Um, I withhold some information about myself. When I'm flirting, I feel like I always withhold information about myself I need to learn to let me tell you.
Speaker 2But the one time I decided not to tell somebody about my past trauma, I didn't think about the fact that my friends and family love to make jokes about my past trauma.
Speaker 1Also we have a podcast that lists our trauma. Most of it, some of it, I'm still hiding, hiding some that stuff that's different.
Speaker 2Podcast is kind of it's weird to announce it to people you won't ever meet. That's true, Like it feels different.
Speaker 1Also, we're basically talking to our microphones. We love all of you. We know you listen because we get lots and get lots of feedback on it.
Speaker 2So it was really funny. Okay, cul-de-sac for a second, because last night I was talking to some people about the podcast and I was telling these other people, hey, you guys should start one, it's super fun and all the things. And they were like well, do you guys get good feedback? And I'm like I don't know, like I don't even listen to it, I just go. I was like you would literally have to ask heather.
Speaker 1Yeah, she refuses, I even send her sound bites and stuff and she's like great, does it sound good, like we're actually funny. You should listen to it once in a while she's like once is enough. Once while I was there. No, all your questions and everything that come in go through me um except except the facebook page that's lacy ran, which I she's gone, so maybe you should assault her over there.
Speaker 2Dude, I have fallen off, come back. I've just been really crazy busy to be honest. It's not even intentional.
Speaker 1I need to like send you the blurbs. You can just copy and paste and get them up there. Why?
Speaker 2don't we? We fucked up when we put me in charge of any of it.
Speaker 1Like you, should have uncentralized account that connected to everything, because I was connected to so many things. It wouldn't let me to reconnect because I have so many pages like I have. We had to have started it all over again. Not attached to me, but it's under me and I can't link it over to facebook because I already have and I didn't want to do the whole anyways. Yeah, so you guys don't even know.
Speaker 2But anyways, lacy's in charge of the.
Speaker 1Facebook. I am in charge of the Instagram. They both have been slacking, but you know what has not been slacking? These episodes. They're up every week. You're welcome. Yes, you have been very good so follow us on whatever you listen to podcasts on, because we're on fucking everything. Now we are on everything and hit that follow, subscribe, like and give us five stars if you feel so inclined. If you don't want to, at least tell us why, I don't care. Any review is a good review. We will listen to your opinion.
Speaker 2I cannot promise we will implement your opinion.
Speaker 1Well, we were good when people said we talked over each other, we're like, yeah, we do that because we're excited.
Speaker 2We have worked hard on that. We still do it sometimes, but I think it's better.
Speaker 1Sometimes think it's better. Sometimes I just have to get it out because it's gonna go away. Right, I'm gonna forget my comment.
Speaker 2Yes, um question 12 flirting makes me feel anxious, agree, but if it's somebody that I'm interested in, it makes me feel excited. Really, yeah, no, nope, literally even even after. Like it probably takes me a month after officially dating someone before I finally feel comfortable flirting with them.
Speaker 1See, if it doesn't feel comfortable, I wouldn't put any energy into it, because if it's not comfortable I feel like right away.
Speaker 2But I'm a people pleaser so I very much will do what you have basically shown or told me that you like, because I know it's important to you and I am a good actress yeah, okay, well again, we're not the same, but that's fine.
Speaker 1If the other person is not interested in me, I don't get upset true yeah, I really added that word.
Speaker 2I enjoy witty banter when flirting. I really agree. Yes, that's why you added really, because you like read it to yourself ahead of time and you're like, fuck yeah, I do. I really added that word. I enjoy witty banter when flirting. Yes, I really agree. Yes, that's why you added really, because you like read it to yourself ahead of time and you're like, fuck yeah.
Speaker 1I do, yes, I do Like I want to be able to joke and joke around and also slightly roast each other. Yes, and like it's funny, but you got it Laughing at each other.
Speaker 2But the whole thing is you got to know the? No, it's not. It's not insulting each other and some people don't get that.
Speaker 1No, it's not it's in a funny, cute way. That's kind of like an inside joke ish.
Speaker 2I like it when you can create that kind of stuff between realistically, I think you're the only person I flirt with currently, and that's what we do. Is that like we roast each other?
Speaker 1oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, it works for it does, it does.
Speaker 2In my current situation, you're like I'm just gonna be here for you I did say that I'm like I will be here for you, supporting you now, and I will be here when it ends you walk that yo-yo, you have fun with that. You do those tricks we both know, but we both do it, so no shame you know, maybe I'll be here on both sides of the coin, maybe the yo-yo will just stay. No, you can only walk the dog for so long before. That shit has to come back up.
Speaker 1Oh God, we've been walking it for a minute now, I know Okay.
Speaker 2All right, Okay. 15. I make it clear if I have a romantic interest in the other person.
Speaker 1True, yes agree, neutral?
Speaker 2Agree, I do sometimes, but I feel like it very much depends on the reaction that I'm getting back from me, because I try really hard to read the room and if I don't feel like you're being active back, I'm not going to then share Like I'm going to step back and be like I'm going to bury that real deep. Yeah. No, same Cause I almost hope that they don't realize what happened.
Speaker 1I try to find out what I have in common with the other person when flirting Agree. Yes, I genuinely enjoy learning about the other person when flirting Agree. Yes, I genuinely enjoy learning about the other person's interests. Yes, unless it's uninteresting to me.
Speaker 2That's so funny and limiting. No I love I because. I get weirdly excited about stupid shit. So I get excited to see when other people get weirdly excited about stupid shit. So I get excited to see when other people get weirdly excited about their stupid shit, so I don't care what it is I look too far in the future.
Speaker 1I'm like if this is going to be like a romantic-ish thing if I have no interest in that. I cannot even stay focused on it. Brayden trying to explain Pokemon to me, my brain instantly goes we're thinking about something else. I get that because that's me. When ashton tries to get me into anime, it's never gonna happen. This is why I will be with a person who is also into fitness, who understands and like we?
Speaker 2just me, because I don't want to hang out with them every day. I'm like, yes, have your own interest, that's great. Go spend time with other people, that's fantastic, see I want the person. You don't have hobbies.
Speaker 2That's the red flag I'm like that is a red flag if you don't have hobbies, but I want our hobbies to also be like coinciding, because I, yeah, like that's fair, because like I want someone who wants to go to concerts with me and who wants to go to plays with me and do random weird shit, like when I travel, find something I've never done before and do it just to say that I did it. I want someone that wants to do that, but also I do want time apart, so like you don't have to come to my book club, but I would like you to go to bunco and I realize I just made myself sound like an 80 year old, you also play darts.
Speaker 1I am on a dart league.
Speaker 2It's fun see this why I'm so busy.
Speaker 1I really enjoy reading and things like that, but I wouldn't necessarily make that person. I guess the big ones, I guess. For me it's just more like you have to enjoy. You don't have to be a bodybuilder. Well, maybe you kind of have to be.
Speaker 2You need to be a gym, bro. Yeah, let's be real, and you need to enjoy the outdoors.
Speaker 1Yes, Because I gym aligned or whatever and hiking was not their thing. I'd be fine with it because I could take lily, but I would really enjoy someone getting up because I do have lily to be like she will wake up at two o'clock in the morning with me and go somewhere and hike, yeah. But no, I'm gonna do that right like it, just just so you know you don't have to participate in that with me. I think that's one, because I really enjoy that with her. So I wouldn't mind, like that being she's my built-in adventure buddy. But you would have to be okay with that and be like you know, I'm gonna check on, I'm gonna check your location and make sure you're not dead yeah, you know, see, and I love hiking, but I love like I sent, I love like mild to moderate.
Speaker 1Oh, I like that, okay, and you like I sent this uh, real to yo-yo and I was like this is like I don't. I didn't send you my location because I'm cheating. They sent it so you can, so you know where to send 9-1-1. And it's this girl like climbing on top of this mountain. She's like that's you, it's me, I'm like why is this so me, and I also did that. I'm like here's my location in case I go missing, only because I don't know?
Speaker 2I mean my kids check my location, my location, with you, because we legitimately need to make sure I'm safe. Yes, always and forever. And me too, yes, god. Yes, because we make bad choices. Yes, do you ever?
Speaker 1like we are better, but yes, still well, it's always like oh, I know where you are. Yeah, it's like oh, heather is not at the gym or at home.
Speaker 2I wonder where she's at I don't wonder where she's at, I don't even need to look.
Speaker 118 oh, I was on 17 no, we just. Oh yeah, I didn't I didn't put it down because I'm like as long as they align with me, so I guess I should go neutral.
Speaker 2Yes, because it goes case by case. That's so funny. Um, I often tilt my head to the side during flirtatious conversations.
Speaker 1I do this when I listen, though, too, I'm always like I do that as a listening thing, but that, okay, that means that I'm interested and thinking.
Speaker 2I feel like I'm so fidgety I change my position like 80 million times, so I'm sure that I do, but again not like consciously, so I'm going to go neutral. Do, but again not like consciously, so I'm going to go neutral.
Speaker 1I'm going agree not strongly agree, but agree because I do that. But I do that with any anything that I mention. Yes, so when I'm like like tilting and looking, that means I'm actively thinking and absorbing you're like processing what they're saying. Yeah, and my brain goes off in random places, so that means a lot if I'm looking and staring yes, that's.
Speaker 2I struggle sometimes because my brain will start its own conversation with itself while someone else is speaking and there's nothing. I can do about it. And then I know already, like I'm literally looking at you and you're talking to me and I cannot at all hear what you're saying. Yeah, that happens, yeah, and I'm like I'm just going to have to ask what.
Speaker 1And once they stop, you know, I've actually gotten in the habit of being like just stopping right away.
Speaker 2I'm sorry, just be like. You need to start again.
Speaker 1Yes, yeah I've done that, then it's like okay, I just have to be honest because I'm gone.
Speaker 2The boys will make fun of me. They're like, you're literally staring right at me. I was like I heard not a word that you just said.
Speaker 1I need you to start over, start over let me get my brain processing a lot of it.
Speaker 2That's the adhd.
Speaker 1Yes I feel like it's my children. Sometimes, too, I have to answer like five questions in one at one time yes, one person is like talking to me over here, the other one's trying to talk to me over here and I'm trying to have an actual conversation with like an adult yeah, this just happened this weekend and they were all talking to me and I'm like and I love lily so much, but she's like rubbing my arm and playing with my watch and I'm like there's so much going on on this side of me and she's
Speaker 1talking and then there's a little person on my arm right like trying to talk to me in a high pitched voice and then I'm actually trying to have a conversation and I'm like it was like overload. I was like normally this would be fine with you touching me, but I can't right now and it was just like all the. It was just a lot. That's fair, because you couldn't imagine. But if you had little girls they would just be all over you.
Speaker 2No, no, thank you sorry. No, I don't know what that's offensive. I know I'm very, very, you know what I mean like they would be boys.
Speaker 1They would end up being like you, but they're just so much different because, like they would end up being like you, brayden's fine I don't know if that's a compliment heather.
Speaker 2I don't know if it was either.
Speaker 1It's not a bad thing. It's just like you, I love you. It just takes a special person. I'm a lot, it's all right.
Speaker 2I know no, it's okay, it just takes a lot to break down those layers same here. I'm a fucking lot, a lot of walls. I'm a lot, yeah, yeah, a little bit, I'm a lot. It's fine, okay, a little out of it.
Speaker 1I try to keep a presentable appearance. If I'm in a flirty situation, yes, but I'm also a gym girl, so now I don't do. Comparatively to three, four years ago, basically I was hair done, makeup done. It took me like two hours to get out of the house. I always was full on yeah, accessories, everything. Now I have a five minute face. Fifteen minutes, I'm out the door.
Speaker 2I care so much less. I went to darts without any makeup on, it's fine.
Speaker 1It smelled like smoke in there, didn't it? I know yes.
Speaker 2It's awful, but the place we're going to this Wednesday, no smoke.
Speaker 1So you can come. Yes, I'm excited. I was like the way the extensions are. It's fine.
Speaker 2I hate it. The second I get home I have to strip, get the smoke off of me.
Speaker 1I just braided into the casino for his birthday, I guess.
Speaker 2Did you? Was that fun?
Speaker 1It was fun. He was so excited to gamble so we, like, skipped school, took him to the casino.
Speaker 2I'm letting Deegan skip school too. Maybe I should take him, because I was like I don't know what we're doing.
Speaker 1Worley is the only one, that is 18, and they give you like extra game play to gamble. You're not saving, this is gambling money. And he's like okay, and he lost all of it within like 20 minutes.
Speaker 2Sure I'm surprised it took 20.
Speaker 1That would not take me very long, he's very like cautious with his money, and so he walked around a lot, but it's like there's some smoking right, there's a couple like non-smoking not very many which there's not a barrier or anything. It's like a door and then you're in the lobby of the hotel basically with the machines, and so it's like okay, whatever, um, but yeah, so there was smoking. There was like really bad, we didn't stay there very long but yes, take him out there.
Speaker 1It was fun. Yeah, maybe I'll do that, um okay, last so my hard thing is like I don't.
Speaker 2I don't know if I would like be self-conscious enough to be like I shouldn't flirt with that person in this state okay, so let's rephrase the question if you knew you were going into a situation where you would be flirting, would you make sure purposely yes, same, because that's fair.
Speaker 1I guess like okay, also the comfortability. I have enemy of myself now my five minute face. I'm fine. I feel like I look presentable my big thing.
Speaker 2I need under eyes a little blush and eyeliner.
Speaker 1I would not do this. Look that. You look at me right now like I just woke up. Okay, everybody, I'm working on my sleep. So I literally woke up at 840 and Lacey was here at 9 and I didn't, so aren't you proud of me, though, that I was actually here.
Speaker 2When I said yes, I was like let's see what she says.
Speaker 1I won't text her yet, I just got up.
Speaker 2I was like I'm. She might message me and say 10 no, because I knew I was ready, and then I looked at my phone and I was like she didn't, so I'm gonna go no, we're in off season.
Speaker 1My cardio is only 25 minutes right now, so I was like I'll sleep and do cardio later, it'll be fine yeah, it worked out it did because we had a later date. We can do a little catch-up episode later, but yes, um going to bed later. Um brayden went to homecoming. I was so happy so I stayed up and waited for him so deegan is zero percent interested.
Speaker 2Um ashton actually kind of wanted to go to homecoming this year, but he had his working audition for cse on the same night and I told him he could pick what he wanted to go to and he chose work over homecoming. So kind of sad because he hasn't.
Speaker 1He didn't go last year there's's more chances for him to go he has two more chances.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1So yeah, brayden, I was like Brayden this is your senior year. I want you to do all the things. So he did the senior sunrise he got his senior pictures done and, yeah, the homecoming now.
Speaker 2Senior sunrise was literally basically in our backyard.
Speaker 1Because they did it on the football field. I'm very well aware that you live behind a football field, because the time when we used to get a little toasty and I would spend the night at your house and then wake up like why am I still drunk and there's whistles going on? Right, because football practice started at like six o'clock in the morning during the summer. Yeah, it was stupid, I hated it, but that's the literally right there, and deegan still didn't fucking go because it's really early.
Speaker 2They had they did the art at 4, 30. Yeah, they had to be over there at five, I think, but they brought them all donuts and stuff. So, yeah, they did that for us. I'm glad that I still have to do a senior photo for deegan. He doesn't want anything to do with anything brayden is an introverted extrovert.
Speaker 1yeah, he puts it on when he performs. He will do all the things's great, friends with everybody, but he's so humble and quiet, he will just. He's like the background friend, but in the front when you need him. So he's me. Yes, and then the girls are like me, we're like yeah here we are.
Speaker 2The girls are very much like you.
Speaker 1Oh gosh, Well, Kinsley's very much a mix of Luke and me very much a mix of luke and me.
Speaker 2So yeah, that's true, lord, help her. She is so doubly stubborn because she has your stubbornness and she has a girlfriend loves to eat yeah yesterday she had three burgers.
Speaker 1We were like out all day doing things you know. So like we're out and she's like I'm like you just had. She's like no, I'm hungry, I'm like it eats all of it. I'm like I don't know where this girl put. Well, I know where she puts it all, but like I can't stop it that's so funny.
Speaker 2Okay, we're gonna come back now because I know a little more on the last one a little mystery never hurt a flirty conversation what does that?
Speaker 1mean, um, you keep, you hold some things back. Maybe you keep a little mystery to it. You don't put all your cards on the table.
Speaker 2Okay, so I'm gonna slightly agree then, because I I there was one time I went on a date with this guy and I don't know what got into me, probably three long islands before he showed up. Let's be real, and I, just like word, vomited a lot of my trauma and I, unsurprisingly, never spoke to that dude you know what you could just do.
Speaker 1You know, we have that episode that was like our trauma, one for one. You could just be like so here you go, listen to this before we go out.
Speaker 2But like that barely even scratches the surface.
Speaker 1I know we have a part two that we really need to get to at some point, do we?
Speaker 2I don't know I feel like if we lay it all out it's better. It's also hard, because I don't know what I've okay that's smart, you should do that? Yeah, I'll do that okay, are you ready to submit your score? Test okay, ready.
Speaker 1One, two, three loading, mine's loading okay mine just reloaded the fucking questions mine too did we take too long?
Speaker 2okay, go ahead.
Speaker 1Okay, you answer quickly um, okay, yes, hold on please. That's so funny. Oh, hold please. Oh god, I can't believe we did that it's because we coldy sack?
Speaker 2I know God, I can't believe we did that. It's because we cul-de-sac?
Speaker 1I know. No, no, they're like what are you guys doing? Only 10 more questions Hold on. I know I'm like I'm also I withhold some information when I'm flirting. No, I think we. Yeah. No, I think we yeah, almost there. I only have three more okay score test. There we go, got it. I have a flirtatious personality but what level? What um? Mine is 79 out of 100. Shut the fuck up what is yours 60, so you are moderately flirtatious.
Speaker 2That's surprising to me. That's higher than I would have anticipated. It says you flirt frequently and may enjoy the game of it only 28 of people are able to accurately detect when someone is flirting with them. That's surprisingly low yeah we said that, yeah, men are more likely to distinguish between friendly behavior and flirting and to see innocuous behaviors as more flirtatious and subjective, because they're more sexually driven. Yeah.
Speaker 1Also, I think men will flirt just to have sex, where women are more flirting for relationship and connection.
Speaker 2Sure, that's fair. I think that sometimes I think we have a tendency to just think they're being nice. That's true. That's true. Like to the point where I've had people like do things for me that are relatively large things and I was like, oh, that was nice of them and did not know that they were like making a gesture, like until way after the fact that's you, I know.
Speaker 1Um. Gazing into another person's eyes is a sign of interest and flirtation. However, there are many differences to this interpretation. Men tend to view the mutual gaze as a sexual invitation invitation, while women see prolonged eye contact as an indication of interest.
Speaker 2See See, like I just said, yeah, basically, eye contact makes me uncomfortable when I am talking. If you are talking, I can look you in the eye, cause I want to like show you that I'm paying attention, but, like when I'm talking, I don't want to like see a reaction to what I'm saying. So it makes me uncomfortable.
Speaker 1So I feel like I skew up the number um if I I don't know, I don't think that I avoid eye contact or anything. I will if the person I think okay, I have done this in the past. Like if a person is flirting with me, I get really weird and I don't want them to flirt. I get fucking awkward as shit to try to get out of the car like get away yeah, I will.
Speaker 2Literally, I don't want you to think yeah it's like I gotta go yeah which also, though, if you were too passive with telling someone.
Speaker 1I learned this from fat roger this is one of you told me that, yeah, you've told me one of the things that fat roger dropped off flowers at my house that had a fucking girlfriend wife.
Speaker 2I'm like I don't know what's happening, right now, but it's like if you are too nice in your denial of their flirting, they will think that they're still an opening facts. Yeah, like you have to be aggressive and you have to cut it off.
Speaker 1Yeah, you have to be like I'm not talking to you ever again.
Speaker 2He would always you become mean because I would talk to him and I was like I don't understand, blah, blah, blah, because we'd be at the bar and I'm like I tell these people, leave me alone. They don't leave me alone. And then you have to get involved because he was the bouncer and I would also not take anything that that man had but I'm saying that's one thing, that's actually smart.
Speaker 2And he's like you know where that happens, right? And I was like why he's like? Because you say no, thank you instead of no, and I was like I'm being nice, he's like exactly, so they think that the all they have to do is like wear you down, and I'm like that's so fucked up and he's like that's men like. And it changed the way that I like looked at things.
Speaker 2Maybe not all men though no, no, no comment I ever make is directed towards an everybody. I think people need to remember that going into conversations more the current climate. People think it's all or nothing and it's like no, that's not how the world works. Extroverts are more likely to be physical, playful or sincere flirts, while introverts tend toward polite. That's fair, so I'm extro you're intro. I feel like I used to be an extrovert and I slow, I was like an extroverted, introvert and now I've turned into an introverted, or whatever.
Speaker 2I'm more introverted now than I used to be, but I've always been a little bit of both.
Speaker 1I feel like I crave more introverted time, because to recharge I need to be within myself, I need to be quiet. But I can do it with another person there with me, as long as they're not in. You know what I mean. Like I just want to recharge and be quiet. You sit there, but I need that quiet time to recharge. I need my brain to quiet down because there's so much going on with me all day long and so many people children, little humans- that need me that like constantly interrupt my thought process Because, like again, even like working, going and training people out to be on, I have my energy.
Speaker 1I'm constantly like putting energy out. So I find that now I need more alone time, like I crave that time where I don't have to talk to anybody.
Speaker 2I feel like I get charged when I'm with people, but it has to be the right people, yeah.
Speaker 1You're like one of the. You are the only person that I'm able to A look like this around and be fine, literally rolled out of bed.
Speaker 2You guys, I'm in my. It's so stupid how cute she looks and she's all like, oh gross.
Speaker 1I'm in a big t-shirt and underwear. Yeah, it's adorable. Oh, they're short underwear. They're shorts. Oh, thank you. And your face looks like that and like the only thing that looks like you just woke up might be your hair.
Speaker 2Oh, my hair, yeah because it's in a braid and it's been sprayed. It's been a slept in half. Yeah, that's it slept in braid. That's the only thing. Otherwise shut up I love you.
Speaker 1You make me feel good about myself. I don't even try to watch. You see me out in the world like this today.
Speaker 2You're like oh she gave you false confidence. But this is why right, like, yes, that's why you're like you can be around me, it's fine I love it.
Speaker 1No, you're. You require no energy to be around, and I love it um.
Speaker 2Women and men flirt differently. Women tend to accentuate their appearance, while men tout their accomplishments so we peacock in different ways. Is what that's saying?
Speaker 1yes, do you remember? We talked about a long time ago and I was like why is it that men are like look, this is what I have, let me provide for you? I'm like is that, like you know, like these are my things, this is what I have and I feel like it's because this is what I can offer you. Yes, that's what it is yes, yeah, and I'm like I don't yeah no, and it's true like even cowardly lion.
Speaker 2He's like. I own this home and I own this boat and I own these jet skis and I own all these vehicles. Aren't I impressive? I'm going to buy this big, expensive piece of equipment for my work, aren't I great?
Speaker 1I'm like I don't care okay, I think that we are not the stereotypical women, because we take care of ourselves. Material does not impress us, but we, we're gonna do an episode about love languages because of shit like that. Yeah, but I do. Okay, I'm not like attracted to the materialistic things, but like I want you to have your shit together, so they kind of usually go hand in hand, but like that's not impressing me, but, but your shoes will guess what I feel like we have to fucking redo that shit, because I was listening back and I'm like none of those no, but also when we did that episode, that was alcoholic time that was that anytime I introduce someone to the podcast I I always go in with a disclaimer.
Speaker 2I'm like listen season one.
Speaker 1It was a shit show.
Speaker 2Season one, we were alcohol, it was fun. Two and three, we are not.
Speaker 1I think it's fun, though, and it's hilarious to go back and listen to, and I remember some of those times and I'm like we were just surviving and it was funny as fuck.
Speaker 2Yeah, we were just surviving and it was funny as fuck. Yeah, we were literally surviving on vibes.
Speaker 1Like if we had a reality show at that point in time.
Speaker 2Oh God, we would be equivalent to Jersey, jersey shore, yeah.
Speaker 1It was hilarious, like the shenanigans, that shenanigan.
Speaker 2Oh, such a crazy time Such a crazy time Fucking Christmas tree.
Speaker 1So many things, so many things, so many things I just christmas tree was a very standout one t-mobile roll up.
Speaker 2Roll up was a really roll up was huge.
Speaker 1That would always yeah, would always roll up with t-mobile.
Speaker 2Yes, yeah it was a time. It was a time in our lives. Let's just what the fuck was I doing?
Speaker 1Mushrooms.
Speaker 2He's not even missing a beat with that, just throwing that right out.
Speaker 1I mean it's fine.
Speaker 2You were a floating head in the hot tub. I I will do that to this day. You were like you were introducing me to exposure therapy.
Speaker 1Still have that. Jennifer dropped her cell phone in the hot tub that night. Yeah, it was a. It's fun, though it was fun, you introduced me to mushroom blizzards let us show you this is the right way to take it roll up your diary. Queen, can we have three mini blizzards please? Cookies and cream mini blizzards it worked, shut up, it did, it did.
Speaker 2I feel like I'm definitely because I'm sober now. I like I am less flirtatious because I don't have liquid courage. Like I don't think I I can't think of the time I last like actively flirted with person like motorcycle, but that doesn't count because we have you know comfortability history.
Speaker 1OK, so we could also play in the factor of comfortability.
Speaker 2Yeah, I think that matters. Like I said, like I, I can flirt with the person that I'm comfortable with, but it takes a while to get there.
Speaker 1This also goes to like I'm an onion person, so it takes a lot to get there. This also goes to like I'm an onion person, so it takes a lot to get through my walls and my layers layers, there's like walls there's a moat, there's walls, yeah and then there's layers yeah, that's fair. There's also like a ring of fire around the moat well and then like there's some snipers on top of the wall.
Speaker 2I remember I posted this on facebook once and it made me laugh so hard because I'm like I like an onion to have layers and also like an onion when you peel one away. The next one is the exact same fucking thing. I just have layers and layers of the same thing over and over.
Speaker 1It's fine, it's fine like eventually we'll get to the center yeah, it's not gonna be any different.
Speaker 2Oh, I don't know what to say to that. I have nothing to come back to that it is funny, I'm just like oh yeah, but I think I mean liquid courage is a real thing.
Speaker 2Like I'm just like, oh yeah, but I think I mean liquid courage is a real thing, like if I went to a bar back when I was drinking, I would not have flirted with a person until I had at least two or three beverages, and then I'd be like okay, because then if I fail I can blame it on alcohol. You know what I mean. So there was less risk and I feel like now it feels different. It feels like putting yourself out there and that feels awful.
Speaker 1Yeah, I guess you just need to meet in more like where you're already comfortable and it's like natural I need to become friends with someone first I feel like this, uh, internet dating stuff you put well, I don't, I've never met anyone off of any dating sites, but like when you go to meet someone, you are automatically kind of like put in a weird spot because you've talked to them and now there's all this pressure. To me I feel like that's harder than when you say, just meet someone, naturally, organically, strike up a conversation. You already kind of have a little spark and then you're more interested to meet them again and it's more organic. I don't like the. I don't know.
Speaker 2That's just weird to me, like I don't know what to say to somebody where I'm like not looking at your face and there's delayed response time, but also I don't want to meet you straight out the gate either, because I don't want to waste my time, because I don't have a lot. So it's like a catch 22 like.
Speaker 2That's why I was super depressed, because I would. There was this one dude and he like asked good questions. We had legit conversation. To me that's flirting, like being legitimately interested in the person and what they have to say and like asking them questions what if it was ai?
Speaker 1do you remember how like, or do you know how people now are putting? They're using ai to run their dating questions and things like?
Speaker 2that I never thought of that way to ruin that for me sorry.
Speaker 1I read a big article about that's what guys are doing now. They're just inputting it honestly, though, and so it comes back.
Speaker 2I might do that because I don't know how to start.
Speaker 1Yeah, I do not know how to start flirting I think it's fine as long as they can continue it. You know what I? Mean that you don't meet them and all of a sudden they're like right, no, I don't know what to say.
Speaker 2To be substance because, let me say, prison. Aaron carter is like one of the dumbest people I've ever met in my life and it I laughed all the time. But it was at him, I'm with him I am dead I am dead and so like we were incompatible in that nature, like I need somebody that I can like have a conversation with yeah, I want to.
Speaker 1Same gotta be smart, and I think that's why I think that's like a problem solving tactic, like somebody that I can be like, because life is like a bunch of problem solutions or someone I can just be like vent to talk to someone that can help solve a problem, whether I want them to or not so I want to tell you something.
Speaker 2Someone said to me once that I to this day am not sure if it was a positive or a negative, and it kind of drives me crazy and I think about it way more than I probably should. They said to me you look way prettier in person than you do in your photos, and I was like that's a positive thanks.
Speaker 1That's a positive. That means that they've been getting a lot of people catfishing them, that they're prettier in their pictures than they are in real life, and this is a thing that I've always gone back to. I don't use filters on my pictures or anything. I think a lot because first it kind of ruins the muscles. If you put a filter on it it automatically takes the lines in your muscles away.
Speaker 2I love you so much, so I'd rather have muscles. Priorities. Yeah, I also don't need to, because that's your fucking face. But like, okay, keep going. Thank you.
Speaker 1I'm also trying to be a lot better about compliments. I'm just like thank you, Even though they kind of make me like Uncomfortable A little bit but I like them. Yeah, they make me sick to my stomach, but I like them?
Speaker 2I don't, I do. I'm trying to.
Speaker 1I am also learning to say thank you because you're like this you go, thank you, that's so fair. That's so fair.
Speaker 2I mean, it looks like I punched you in the gut at the same time, you're like that's what it, that is also what it feels like, at the same time like your face says pain, but your voice says thank you sometimes I think my therapist needs to listen to the podcast, just like send it on over I think you'll get more out of it.
Speaker 2Let's talk about it when I see you next but that's also what makes like flirting difficult, because like I don't even because they're confused your face is saying one thing and your voice is saying another.
Speaker 1I get it. I visually just saw the representation they're like. I don't know what she's saying.
Speaker 2She's saying that was like when me and denise went to the bar and like I got blackout drunk and afterwards she's telling me about it and she's like these dudes were hitting on you and I was like, was I nice? And she goes? You were you and I was like, so no, because I know you probably weren't interested. It's not on purpose. My face just says what I'm thinking.
Speaker 1I do not know how to shut that off.
Speaker 2That is the autism Speaking loudly.
Speaker 1You just need to put a bag over your head or something, sometimes Be like I'm sorry, she can't. She's Tourette, she can't control her face.
Speaker 2So we're just gonna do this.
Speaker 1It's a condition you show up to a date. You're like literally twitches sometimes I gotta go. I'll be right back.
Speaker 2Go fix your face like heather my face someone will be telling me a story and I'm so mortified that my eye will twitch when they're talking to me. And I'm so mortified that my eye will twitch when they're talking to me. I'm like this is not it. 911, run away.
Speaker 1Run away. I know the face, I got the face earlier, when I was like. So there's this thing.
Speaker 2And I'm like, I'm so happy for you. You're like, I am just going to say what I always say and be here. You're making me wheeze. I'm fucking laughing.
Speaker 1Min minus five hours till you text me again about this scenario. But that's fine. We'll be on this roller coaster a few times today, but that's good, it's an upswing, it's an uphill. It's so good, it's a ride. You've been up for five minutes heather, it's fine I knew coming in. I've been where warning you for days, like, just so you know. It was like this is happening. I don't know what to do about it. Okay, so my toes in, okay, my foot's in. I just fucking jumped all the way in again, okay we're in.
Speaker 2I tried, I gave all of the warnings, so far, we're fine. Just be careful, just be prepared, just remember, be careful, just be prepared, just remember, I am, I am Until it happens and then you're going to forget all of it.
Speaker 1It's fine, it's fine. What if it doesn't? Stay tuned On the next episode, next episode.
Speaker 2So yo, yo, yo yo.
Speaker 1Right when you recover from the whiplash. No Things can be different. Times can be different.
Speaker 2Literally some relationships should come with an insurance policy to pay for your medical bills.
Speaker 1For that emotional whiplash, that the yo-yo thing. We have circled back around for several years. So maybe timing is like and there has never been any, everything has always ended very amicably. Like, well, yes, it has never been like any other situation. It's like, yes, maybe I don't like, at least there's like an explanation.
Speaker 2Well, not in the beginning, but I also, first time you can say, it never ended in anger.
Speaker 1That's where you can say never, no, um, the first time like, okay, yeah, like the, the very long was me. The first one was me actually, um, and then I forgot about these. Oh yeah, eat them, keep talking. Um, the first time was me, anyways, when we actually like decided to, yes, there was. I liked the amicability, it was a good like facts. I understood it wasn't what I wanted, but then you know, we're just trying things out again. We'll see what happens we'll see if life, we'll see if life throws a.
Speaker 2I'm just enjoying it and seeing what happens I can give you all the shit in the world, but I also cannot shame you because I do the same shit with motorcycle so well, and here's the thing, we've changed.
Speaker 1a lot people can change, but you do have to be a little more like, open, and I think there's just conversations that need to be had about like expectations of future and like OK, so we're not just wasting time.
Speaker 2You know what I mean. Like no, I think that's important Expectations. I can do what I'm doing with motorcycle because I know that this is all it is and I can.
Speaker 1I've accepted that you also put boundaries. You said, yeah, I did. And I said I'm not allowing my heart to be a part of it this time and so if you want this or you can have this and I feel like he's kind of figuring things out and they're probably going more in your favor, but this works really well for you because you like the distance thing I know he's like we won't work because it's long distance.
Speaker 2I'm like you don't understand that. That's literally in my pro column you're like what are you talking?
Speaker 2about, I think, motorcycle for you needs to work through whatever workout it's fine, but I've accepted that and I'm okay but you're having fun I'm having fun in the moment, yeah, and it is easier because I literally I was like, no, take my heart out of it, and then I can just enjoy it for what it is and then it's fine. I did that, and then I can flirt with him all day, every day, because history yes, member comfortability yeah it matters.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2All right, I think that's it today. Wow, we're at an hour. Oh damn Shit, we didn't look.
Speaker 1Our bad. It's fine, it's fine, but we're going to go. Yeah, we're going to go now. Bye, bye, everyone, until next week. We're going to go now. Well, now, see you later, bye.