If Trauma Had A Delete Button, My Ex Would Be First In Line

What would you trade for peace of mind—a full year of your memory, a single person who did damage, or nothing at all? We crack open a messy, honest thought experiment and chase it through the real costs: identity, relationships, and the lessons that only hard seasons can teach. The premise sounds merciful—wipe the worst twelve months, skip the grief, dodge the chaos—but the ripple effects are ruthless. If those months built your boundaries and instincts, deleting them might also delete the wisdom you use to stay safe now.

We walk through the edge cases: picking a “boring” year, erasing only one person Eternal Sunshine‑style, and why pattern recognition matters more than clean timelines. The conversation gets personal—sober choices that changed the arc, manipulation that took time to unlearn, and the way self‑awareness can make you cringe before it makes you better. We also let humor breathe the heavy parts: ADHD love languages (object permanence affection is real), time blindness as a dragon you have to slay to show up on time, and the absurdity of the “boy aquarium” at a hockey game. The stories get unhinged and human, but the throughline stays clear: you don’t become stronger by forgetting; you become safer by integrating.

If you’ve ever wished for a delete button on your past—after a breakup, a loss, or a season that still echoes—this conversation offers a grounded alternative. Keep the memories, mine them for meaning, and level up without repeating the same boss fight. Hit play for honest takes, dark humor, and practical reflections on trauma, resilience, ADHD, sobriety, and friendship that shows up with snacks, rides, and the truth.

Enjoyed this one? Subscribe, rate five stars, and share with a friend who might be tempted by the “erase” button. Then tell us: if you could erase one year—or one person—would you do it, and why?

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Transcript

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SPEAKER_01 0:34

Welcome back to another uh hold on. Oh, it said write error message, but we're still recording, so that's fine. Uh welcome everyone to We Are Not the Same. But sometimes we are. Um there was a guy today walk that walked into the gym and he had a sweatshirt that said we are not the same. And I kind of died inside because it was like, oh, foreshadowing to what's gonna happen later on today. That's funny. Our podcast.

SPEAKER_03 1:04

Also, I'm sure his was a slightly different meaning to him. Yeah. That's fine. I haven't been in a gym in a really long time.

SPEAKER_01 1:18

Like two years fish. Mine is less than two hours ago, but I digress. So today to the gym. You should come with me sometime when you're not broken. Um, if that ever happens. But today, I like have a topic question type thing. Um, I'm gonna turn this up because I feel like we're not, or maybe it's my microphone. I don't know. Okay, there we go. Um if you could erase one year of your life, would you do it? And then I have follow-up questions.

SPEAKER_03 1:57

You don't even need an answer before you're like, and I have follow-up questions. I do. So maybe Can I ask questions? Yeah. Okay, first, why are you why are you thinking about this?

SPEAKER_01 2:09

Because I'm like, you know that movie, like um spotless. Oh no.

SPEAKER_03 2:16

Eternal Sunshine on the Spotless Line. Want a Jim Carrey's best movie. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 2:21

I'm like, okay, so like there has to be some sort of technology that we could do this. But if you do that, then it alters like your world and who you are and all the things that are to come. So is it worth it? Is it worth it? I have a lot of questions.

SPEAKER_03 2:36

Because I can't, I don't feel like that's a question that you can just answer out the gate without knowing some like stats.

SPEAKER_01 2:42

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 2:43

I know you know what I mean. What kind of stats? Like, one, do I get to pick the year?

SPEAKER_01 2:48

Yes, no, that's the thing. If you could choose any year you want, would you, and what would it be? Like, if you had the opportunity to take one year out of your life and be like, fuck this year. Done, over with. And you never remembered any of it ever again.

SPEAKER_03 3:01

Does my relationship with people clearly stay where it is?

SPEAKER_01 3:07

See, that's the thing you don't know. Because in my mind, no, because if you take that year out and then you keep going like that year never happened, then nothing in that year would have ever happened.

SPEAKER_03 3:18

But that seems okay. See, this is why we have follow-up questions.

SPEAKER_01 3:22

This is what happens when like I get stoned and I'm driving in the car alone.

SPEAKER_03 3:29

You I get that. I have the weirdest conversations with myself when I'm in the car and I'm yeah. I understand how you would get here.

SPEAKER_01 3:38

Um, this is one that I like text. I'm like, I have a great topic. Anyways, yes, because this could heal a lot of people's trauma, theoretically, right? You take away a traumatic event that you never experienced, but yeah. Because that's the lights could also shape who you are as a person, like me, now, totally different.

SPEAKER_03 4:00

Do the people have like they just think you just disappeared for a year? So, like, you know what I mean? Like, how does that work?

SPEAKER_01 4:08

Like one year of your life is gone.

SPEAKER_03 4:09

No, I get that, but don't worry about other people.

SPEAKER_01 4:12

Don't worry about other people's life. It's a fear you fucking met me. Don't worry about other people. That's literally my own. For the sake of time, because I'm not gonna go through everybody in your life, nor do I care about it. I just want to understand how just you. You're just talking about you, specifically you. In regards to you. I can't answer the question. But you have to answer the questions in regard to you. And like your kids, I guess, right? You would be missing out on whatever year, whatever happened in that amount of time, unless it was before them.

SPEAKER_03 4:41

Yeah, I just want to know if people think that you went missing during that year.

SPEAKER_01 4:45

That's all I want to know. No, it's just like a year is wiped out from your memory.

SPEAKER_03 4:49

It's blurry to them. They don't know what happened either. So you can't even, you know, ask. Okay, that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01 4:55

Maybe we could say more like it's literally wiped out from your memory. So you still lived it, but it is now completely gone.

SPEAKER_03 5:00

Ooh, but I think that changes it.

SPEAKER_01 5:03

That does kind of change it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 5:04

But that makes it a whole nother interesting topic, actually.

SPEAKER_01 5:07

I would like to say just taking it away altogether, just like erasing it. We could go down both, we could go down both rabbit holes. No, I couldn't. Because if I could erase a particular thing, I would definitely erase Johnny Bravo out of my life and pretend like that never happened.

SPEAKER_03 5:19

Yeah, that's fair. I would definitely erase Johnny.

SPEAKER_01 5:22

But if I could erase like an event, like it would be Luke's death, but then also like I'm a completely different person now, right? Yeah. So obviously we take that back.

SPEAKER_03 5:32

But that's what makes it hard because you you look at all the things that are hard based off of the event, and then you're like, I would give anything to not have that hard. But then you have to be like, but think of all the good that also came out of that, and whether or not you're willing to do that.

SPEAKER_01 5:50

Any good ever came out of it, other than just like, I just am resilient, and I'm done showing that I'm fucking resilient. I'm done. I get that too. Like, I get it. I can take anything that life throws at me, but I'm real done playing dodge dodgeball.

SPEAKER_03 6:04

So this is what that's what life is.

SPEAKER_01 6:06

It's just like giant dodgeball.

SPEAKER_03 6:08

There's like if you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball. I cannot dodge a wrench.

SPEAKER_01 6:13

You get hit by everything metaphorically and physically.

SPEAKER_03 6:17

Like, I didn't mean that literally. But it fits fair.

SPEAKER_01 6:20

Tracks, tracks. That's exactly yeah.

SPEAKER_03 6:24

So then, okay, so let's say you even consider doing it. Now you have to pick which year though, right? Because like I have multiple traumatic things. You have multiple traumatic things.

SPEAKER_01 6:35

I would easily go for like something in my childhood that I could just forget about that I could then still have all the other things. I feel like if you take out the year in my childhood where I like ran away in the middle of the night with my mom and like went into Heidi, like the whole like really scary shit that happened, if I just like got rid of that, I wonder like what my real like if I would if things would be different.

SPEAKER_03 6:59

Yes. Yeah, that's a fair question. See, I my personal experience is no, it wouldn't be different because I don't remember anything from my childhood.

SPEAKER_01 7:09

But you don't have any traumatic core memories?

SPEAKER_03 7:12

No, I don't remember pretty much anything before I was in high school. Like I have uh spot memories and most of those aren't like actual memories. They're either I saw a video of it or I've had enough people tell me what happened that I've like created a false memory where like I've I've created a video in my brain.

SPEAKER_01 7:31

Well, the year, just a high school year then.

SPEAKER_03 7:34

Oh yeah, just straight out the gate. I got it. I got it wrong from the fucking beginning.

SPEAKER_01 7:38

No, I mean like getting out of no, I mean like getting rid of one of those years.

SPEAKER_03 7:41

I know, that's why I'm saying straight out the gate. That my very first year of memory, I fucked I made bad decisions from the start of what I've done.

SPEAKER_01 7:50

So if you could take one of those away. Because obviously we wouldn't change our children, so you'd have to do it up and it absolutely would.

SPEAKER_03 7:58

Well, not necessarily.

SPEAKER_01 7:59

Because if I didn't if I didn't So you don't want to change anything, you just want to live your life. You'll you won't change anything.

SPEAKER_03 8:08

I would have to change something after my kids were born.

SPEAKER_01 8:12

Because Okay, so then just pick a year that was boring. That's why it's hard if you had to. Pick a year that was boring that you don't want to like that you just get rid of up.

SPEAKER_03 8:19

No, I think I would just go for I would go for the year where okay, here's another question. Does it have to be a calendar year or can it be like a specific month to a 12-month period? Then I would do the period between where me and the boys' dads split up and I started my relationship with fat Roger that year, because those were two like just outlandish.

SPEAKER_01 8:46

You don't want to get rid of the fat Roger?

SPEAKER_03 8:49

No, that's why I'm saying I want to get rid of that whole year because then I wouldn't that whole thing wouldn't have happened. Yes, I agree. Everything from that moment after would have been different. Yes. So that is the year that I would choose. I think that makes the most, I feel like I could capitalize on that the most. Like me and Carrie would still end, but maybe it would like it wouldn't have equaled stalking and craziness and two years of chaos and all the things. Right. You know what I mean? Maybe like because if he thought I just disappeared and then I could just show back up and he'd just be like, what the fuck? But enough time would have passed. You know what I mean? Like now, now I'm gonna freaking have fantasies about that.

SPEAKER_01 9:30

Because then I'm like, sign me up for the trial. Where do I do this?

SPEAKER_03 9:33

Right, because then that would have saved me so much hard.

SPEAKER_01 9:37

Yes, I agree. I would also say, I mean, obviously, I would just say Luke's death, I think. And then I'm gonna go.

SPEAKER_03 9:43

Yeah, because that would stop Johnny Bravo, I think. Like if you didn't that year was so hard with you emotionally. Yeah, like that tore you down to make you vulnerable to somebody like him.

SPEAKER_01 9:56

He just picked it up, he just monopolized on my vulnerable piece. They can read unfortunately, but now but see then also like you couldn't get one over on me now.

SPEAKER_03 10:07

Right, so right, then you go back to lessons learned. Is the lessons that you've learned from that situation enough?

SPEAKER_01 10:15

I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 10:16

It's hard to like damn it, because now that makes me as I was all like on board and all the things, and now I that thought process alone makes me not because I was broken by the before the beginning of that year.

SPEAKER_01 10:31

So I wouldn't have killed is it kind of like you just end up like devaluing your no okay.

SPEAKER_03 10:38

Would you end up right back where you ended where you would have?

SPEAKER_01 10:40

So, like your character in life, right? Your character, like your video game analogy, right? Like your little guy, right? Like has been been through so much shit. It's like evolved. You're like this. If you take that year away, do you become de-evolved? You know what I mean? Like all that year you did grow whether you wanted to or not. You wouldn't have grown at all, especially if it was fucking hard.

SPEAKER_03 11:01

So then you end up in the same spot just a year behind. So now I'm getting everything a year older? Fuck that.

SPEAKER_01 11:06

And then what happens if you still have to go through it and then you're like living it all over again?

SPEAKER_03 11:10

You'd have to, because you didn't learn that fucking lesson, and you still have to learn that lesson to be so either you're not gonna be as good of a person, or you're just doing the same shit anyway, and you're just delaying it. And what the what's the point of delaying it? It might not be with the same people, it might be a different path, but if you don't learn that same lesson, you're just gonna be a piece of shit.

SPEAKER_01 11:33

This is very true.

SPEAKER_03 11:35

Well, think about think of me and you didn't get sober. Yes, you know what I mean? Like, I that's a scary thought.

SPEAKER_01 11:43

I know ours were very different. Ours were very different. I very much like needed to take the alcohol out of the grief journey.

SPEAKER_03 11:52

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 11:52

Um, that was very much needed to heal.

SPEAKER_03 11:56

I agree. I just needed to stop spiraling.

SPEAKER_01 12:00

And I had no idea you were like so Nobody knew. Like, I thought you were just like really good at hiding it. Yes, you were. You were.

SPEAKER_03 12:09

It wasn't until like a lot of people thought I was being overdramatic because they're like, you're not that bad. And then I'm like, you don't know the stories because I'm smart and I have friends in that group and friends in that group and friends in that group. So it only looks like I black out once or twice, but because I switch groups, I really black out all the fucking time.

SPEAKER_01 12:29

Nobody knew and you can hide it well with me because I'm Cinderella and also in turn. Cinderella still stays around to this day, by the way. That's fair. That's fair.

SPEAKER_03 12:40

See, I don't know. I I'm gonna now I'm in team. No, I don't want to do it.

SPEAKER_01 12:45

Yeah. But God, it's tempting. It is tempting. Um, because well, mine especially, because I could bring back somebody.

SPEAKER_03 12:56

Yeah, well, okay, and so then there's the third alternative, which is the plot of Eternal Sunshine and the Spotless Vine, where they literally erase just the person. You pick one person, and every memory you ever had, that person is gone. I would do that. Then I think that makes it a much easier. I'd be like, yeah, sign G the thought. You obviously would get rid of Johnny Bravo, I would obviously get rid of Fat Roger, and like instantly our like confidence, we just wake up the next day and be like, God, I'm amazing. Like, why didn't I just live that way before?

SPEAKER_01 13:28

Right?

SPEAKER_03 13:28

I don't know because I wouldn't fucking remember. It would be so good.

SPEAKER_01 13:31

Yes, I think Fat Roger fucked with you so bad. Yeah. I hate it.

SPEAKER_03 13:38

I know it still affects me. It's cool.

SPEAKER_01 13:41

Um I mean it's not, but I didn't want to admit that John well not admit, I guess I didn't realize the effect the actual mental abuse and like manipulation the way that it like poisoned my thought process for a while. It like took a fucking minute to like deprogram that shit.

SPEAKER_03 14:02

I am well aware.

SPEAKER_01 14:03

I fucking sat here waiting impatiently for it to happen because I I knew I was like, I was at least I'm like self-ware enough to be like, this is fucking stupid that I feel like this because of XYZ. And I've never felt like this before. Like I thought I was done being traumatized by my husband fucking dying and me almost dying. Like, you think that would be enough? No, Mr. Fucking Tiny Ankles and fucking big ears had to come around. It's Johnny Bravo. If anyone was wondering, aka.

SPEAKER_03 14:31

Everybody knows. You don't have to you did not need a further description other than tiny ankles. Everyone was well aware who you were speaking about.

SPEAKER_01 14:39

Yeah, just came along and just willingly decided to like also traumatize me and the chill. I'm like, why? So dumb. Bad choice, bad choice on him that backfired.

SPEAKER_03 14:50

That's the whole thing though about being self-aware. Like, once you become self-aware, you become the most self-aware person ever. But like you fight it so hard when you're you know you're in a bad situation. Like every part of you is like, this is like alarms, alarms are going off, and you're just like, nope, la la la. I'm going to ignore all of it. La la la. And then you become so self-aware that like you're like, you can see everything, and then you just feel stupid.

SPEAKER_01 15:20

And then you just feel stupid. It's true though. Yeah, well, now I can see things like a mile away. I'm like very thankful that my situation is like honestly, actually really fucking healthy.

SPEAKER_03 15:32

Yeah, and like if you got rid of all those mem-that's the whole point of that movie, too, right? Because they ended up repeating the same, they still ended up in the same relationship, same pattern.

SPEAKER_01 15:44

That's my video game analogy. You would not have leveled up anymore because if you have all these years built into that character and building it up and involving it, you take one fucking year away, you're down a year, but still the same character.

SPEAKER_03 15:55

Because you or you're exactly where you left off, and everybody else has progressed, so it's just you just wasted time and you still have to deal with it. Now you're behind. Now you're just behind. Because now everyone's gonna think you're old.

SPEAKER_01 16:06

Oh my god. Is this just like everybody has to go through life and deal with their piles of shit in the most graceful way possible? I mean, yeah. You do for us. And this Sims game is not fun anymore. Oh my god, I was addicted to that fucking game. Really? Yes.

SPEAKER_03 16:22

That surprises me.

unknown 16:24

That surprises me.

SPEAKER_01 16:26

I love I I would still play it to this day.

SPEAKER_03 16:29

Like I I love mind-numbing shit because my brain is go, go, go, go, go all the time. I would literally sit down and just play that until like I would play until somebody would be like, you need to stop. So I would like 10 hours in a day and just wouldn't even question it, wouldn't even like be like, this is not healthy. Not that long, but I definitely enjoyed it. But I would like, I would play hard for like weeks and then I wouldn't play for real long.

SPEAKER_01 16:55

I think I like hyperfixated on it for a second, and then I'm like, it didn't. Then there was like other shit to do.

SPEAKER_03 17:00

Because it would seem, but then it would take me, it would take me too long to progress, and then I would get angry, and then I'm like, but that's just real life, right?

SPEAKER_01 17:09

The same.

SPEAKER_03 17:10

Love it. Yeah what was your instrument of choice? Um, the guitar. I like the drums. See, we could have jammed together.

SPEAKER_01 17:16

I had why didn't we? I had them at the end of the day. We didn't meet until later in life. I went and I bought like Braden.

SPEAKER_03 17:23

They're making a new one.

SPEAKER_01 17:24

Okay, so we're gonna do that.

SPEAKER_03 17:26

Oh my god, we should do that. We're gonna do that, and then we're gonna make videos. Maybe because we always say we're gonna make videos, and then we're gonna go.

SPEAKER_01 17:33

I'm holding us to it. We have a plan. We have a plan. I love it.

SPEAKER_03 17:38

It's so fun. And if you get the whole kit where you get like the two guitars and the drum and the microphone.

SPEAKER_01 17:44

Oh, we're gonna jam.

SPEAKER_03 17:46

Yeah. And we'll go head to head. We will do something. Don't hear from either one of us for a while.

SPEAKER_01 17:51

We're in the basement. Playing guitar hero or rock band, excuse me. Oh my god. I'm so excited. It's the same difference. It's the same thing. Oh, I'm a little nasally. I'm getting over being sick, so.

SPEAKER_03 18:03

You just now tell me that I've been in your house for how long? Oh, well, you can't hear it. No. Oh.

SPEAKER_01 18:09

I'm feeling better now. So it was like contagious before. I'm not sharing any beverages with you. I made you your own coffee. No, you did.

SPEAKER_03 18:16

It was really nice. All fucking fancy too. Oh. You made fancy coffee. I do not have fancy coffee. I've only made coffee for the past two days in a row, which I'm actually proud of myself because I did something two days in a row. And I wore my retainers two days in a row because I went to the dentist and I got yelled at.

SPEAKER_01 18:31

Mega depression is going away. I'm working on it. Mega Aries. Mega depression is going away. Oh, that's so funny. Um, okay, so back to our, we are not going to take that one year. We're not going to do it. Because um I think we've worked really hard on evolving.

SPEAKER_03 18:46

It's weird that, like, I know it's hard to tell, but I'm in a good place for me.

SPEAKER_01 18:53

No, you really are actually.

SPEAKER_03 18:54

You know what I mean, Mike? It doesn't seem that way because of the mega depression, but realistically, if you're looking at the scope of my life, I'm in a pretty good spot.

SPEAKER_01 19:03

This is like the least of the worries. The mega depression is the least.

SPEAKER_03 19:06

This has been around forever. It's fine. It's like my pet. It's chronic mega depression. That I carry with me all the time. Oh. What do we call it? I don't I don't have a name for it. I don't know if that makes it weird.

SPEAKER_01 19:22

I'm trying to think of a name for it.

SPEAKER_03 19:24

You're trying to name my depression. Yeah. We've we've reached a weird place. Patricia. No. Why do I always do it? Because that makes more sense for Mega Aries than fucking depression. Let's move. Because Patricia's meant to be crazy. And I love you dearly, but like when you like you toe the line sometimes. You get scary. You get a little scary.

SPEAKER_01 19:45

Do I get scary?

SPEAKER_03 19:46

You get a little scary sometimes.

SPEAKER_01 19:48

When have I ever been scary?

SPEAKER_03 19:50

Um, when you lost the memory card. I just sat here and I was like, she I she just needs to let it all out. You were really mad, and I was like, oh, you did find it.

SPEAKER_01 20:01

Thank you.

SPEAKER_03 20:02

I was nervous.

SPEAKER_01 20:03

Okay, also the kids move my shit all the time, and I'm so sick of it.

SPEAKER_03 20:07

It's frustrating.

SPEAKER_01 20:08

I'm like, I can't leave one thing at all. Okay, we're going through this thing with Lily where she uses all of my stuff, sleeps in my bed, pretends like everything I own is hers. Meanwhile, she just bought a lock. Literally, your mini me. She just bought a lock for her own door. That's okay. And doesn't even utilize her own bedroom. She sleeps in here, showers in here. Sleeps in here, showers in here, utilizes all of my products. She just goes in there to change and do her makeup and then come out. So my room. Because Kinsley goes in there. Oh, that's fair. And she's ironically doesn't like it when her stuff gets touched. Enough at me. Yeah, but mine, it's fine.

SPEAKER_03 20:49

It's very different for me than you because I have boys and you have girls. I mean, you have a boy, but like.

SPEAKER_01 20:55

Yeah, and he was great. He didn't use it any of my boys. Very different.

SPEAKER_03 20:57

Right. I don't have to worry about that. Not that I I mean I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_01 21:00

He respects my stuff. He does not want to sleep in bed with me. He does not care to wear my clothing.

SPEAKER_03 21:05

He's like, Yeah, I don't have any of those problems.

SPEAKER_01 21:09

I have two girls I'm willing to trade for two boys. You have two. Send them on over.

SPEAKER_03 21:15

I have three. Well, I have two and a half.

SPEAKER_01 21:17

You know, I'm really looking for a Frenchie. Two children for a Frenchie. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. The short one's already like a Frenchie.

SPEAKER_03 21:35

Because then they also don't know where they put it. Because my whole family is full of people with autism and ADHD. And it's just, I live in utter chaos at all times.

SPEAKER_01 21:47

And you have six dogs.

SPEAKER_03 21:48

I have six dogs. I have three teenage boys. My youngest turns 16 tomorrow. And then I have a big thing. Happy birthday.

SPEAKER_01 21:56

Happy birthing baby. Oh, so weird. Oh my sniffly nose. Sorry. Everyone had a hearing.

SPEAKER_03 22:01

Do you okay? We're so just off the wall at this point, but we're just talking. Do you uh like get weirdly nostalgic for your birthing day when you get your kids' birthday? Like mine was super traumatic both times, but every time around their birthday, I think about how traumatic their birthing day was.

SPEAKER_01 22:20

No, because mine was pretty like it's just like well, Madison was obviously that's a very hard like and traumatic, but all the other ones after that, I never even felt I've still never felt a contraction to this day. I don't know what that's like. I've only had space, okay. Went in with Madison, they're like, we're doing a C-section now, blah blah blah. But like that was at 28 weeks, yeah. And then everything after that's been scheduled. So I just know I go in, like scheduled from my very first appointment. Like here I am in my eight-week appointment.

SPEAKER_03 22:51

Like, when do you want to When do you want to have X-Y?

SPEAKER_01 22:55

Do you not remember? Okay, well, you don't remember. So Kinsley, she was supposed to her due date was 1022.

SPEAKER_03 23:00

I remember you being past.

SPEAKER_01 23:02

Well, no, it was before. She was four weeks early. So 1025 was her due date. And then they adjusted it. And then so 1010 was gonna be her um was her new date? Her uh evacuation, her C-section date. Her evacuation.

SPEAKER_00 23:19

What is this motion?

SPEAKER_01 23:20

Why cut open, cutting me open date, right? Slicing me open, getting her out. Ah, that word just escaped me. Okay, I don't know. I did go. I'm telling you, my brain sometimes is fucking wild. Girl. I did glutes really hard today, and I'm just like, and also, yeah, anyways, I thought the coffee would revive me. It did not. So then 1010 was her date that she would have been like a little over a week early, and then she came on 925 because she was eight pounds, six ounces in the ultrasound. He measured my uterus, and he's like, You can't get anything. We're gonna get an ultrasound, and I'm like, what's wrong? Right? So I also have like associated, like, and I didn't gain a lot of weight with her.

SPEAKER_03 24:04

No, but you had a belly big old belly.

SPEAKER_01 24:06

She went and I was measuring 43 weeks at 36. Not even 36, 35. So then they're like, Well, we're just gonna go ahead and get her out. So she came oh a little over four weeks early.

SPEAKER_03 24:20

Both my boys were early. And she was eight pounds, four ounces. That's crazy. I had little babies.

SPEAKER_01 24:25

Kinsley has always been in the 99th percentile and off the charts. That's so funny. It's wild. She's fun.

SPEAKER_03 24:35

We went way off topic.

SPEAKER_01 24:37

We did on the whole thing. We are so bad. We did really good because we both. I feel like we did.

SPEAKER_03 24:42

We did answer the question. I don't feel like I have anything else to contribute to that question.

SPEAKER_01 24:46

That was a good one, though. I do think that's something that in the future would be offered and something that I would consider for certain things.

SPEAKER_03 24:54

Okay, that's what's scary is how quickly like AI is advancing. It scares the shit out of me a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 25:00

So I'm not gonna lie. We can now go get ketamine and MDMA assisted psychotherapy in Seattle as the first place in Washington, I think, doing it. That would make sense that it would be Seattle.

SPEAKER_03 25:13

I haven't I haven't gone back. I don't have the money. I have a cruise I have to pay for. Well, uh choices. Isn't that crazy? I'm literally choosing a cruise with my family that's gonna stress me out over my own mental health. I mean, who I am as a person.

SPEAKER_01 25:35

That's okay. It's okay. You're a good mom. You are a great mom.

SPEAKER_03 25:38

Um that's like the one compliment that I actually like actually makes me feel good. You know what I mean? Like if someone tells me they think I'm pretty, I think they're lying. So it doesn't do anything for me.

SPEAKER_01 25:51

Because fat Roger conditioned you to not think you're pretty.

SPEAKER_03 25:54

But if you tell me that I'm a good mom, like that's probably like the best thing you could ever say to me ever. I'll instantly kind of swing a little bit. Hey girl, hey.

SPEAKER_01 26:05

I have questions for us. Questions. We love these questions.

SPEAKER_03 26:15

It's funny because I've known you for so long. But like, I feel like we're still getting to know each other.

SPEAKER_01 26:21

Oh, this was one thing I want to talk about. ADHD love languages nobody talks about. Oh, object permanence affection. If I put your favorite snack in the fridge for you, that's basically a love letter.

SPEAKER_03 26:34

Yes, oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 26:36

These were like they hit so hard. I was like, Oh my god, okay, yes, because I always okay, I also do this for the person. Like, I'm like always want to think about their favorite. I do it even for you. I'm always like, I need you to have a little snacky that you like, and you need a little beverage.

SPEAKER_03 26:50

You always make sure that I have something to drink and something to eat. If okay, here and you all you're like, bake good? I'm like, yes, please.

SPEAKER_01 26:56

How you know if I like you or not? Even as a person, like e general as a person. If I want to water you and feed you. Yeah. Or beverage you.

SPEAKER_03 27:04

She starts treating you like a plant.

SPEAKER_01 27:07

If I do not offer you anything to eat or drink, you are in an outer circle. If you if I offer you something to eat or drink, you are in my inner circle.

SPEAKER_03 27:14

I will go out of my way.

SPEAKER_01 27:16

There's only a few in that inner circle, too.

SPEAKER_03 27:18

I will literally drive to an inconvenient location if it's the only place that has something that I know that you like. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I don't mind going out of my way for somebody because that is such an easier way for me to tell somebody that I like them than to tell someone that I like them.

SPEAKER_01 27:33

It's just like the little ways of showing.

SPEAKER_03 27:35

I can't verbally tell you that makes me uncomfortable.

SPEAKER_01 27:38

It's about the little acts of showing, though. You know what I mean? Like, and that's like a little act of love. Like, it's just you I'm thinking about you type of thing. Yes. So uh time blindness commitment. If I'm actually on time for you, understand that I fought a dragon. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 27:52

I am really bad about being late. Like it's a bigger problem than I care to like actually acknowledge, even though like I know it is. I'm never on time. I'm fucking never ever ever on time. If you're on time for someone, I'm convinced that I can be. And that therein lies the problem. Like, I will not accommodate for the fact that I am always late because I am convinced that I can make it in that amount of time. Like, no, I'm good. Even though history has proven to me that I can't.

SPEAKER_01 28:28

Like, nah, you're not gonna make it.

SPEAKER_03 28:31

So I don't even know if I am capable. I don't know if I've ever liked somebody enough to put in that extra level to leave five minutes faster. I don't know if I've ever done it.

SPEAKER_01 28:42

I definitely, I definitely do that.

SPEAKER_03 28:45

I you do more than just five minutes. Like you're like overly cautious when you like it.

SPEAKER_01 28:50

Either I'm like way early or I'm late.

SPEAKER_03 28:53

Like there's no in between. Over an hour.

SPEAKER_01 28:56

Early? No. Oh, late. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 28:58

You're if you're not early, you're gonna be like extra late.

SPEAKER_01 29:02

Okay, but okay, and if I really love you, I'm just very inconsistent and all over the place. Sorry, Lacey. No, I'm just kidding. You just get me in all kinds of lights. So it's like if the kids are being like assholes, sometimes it takes forever to get out. If I lost my fucking keys, if I'm coming from the gym, if I have to like eat a meal, bring a meal. I don't know, there's so many things.

SPEAKER_03 29:19

I plan for you to be late. The thing is, and then all of a sudden I'm early and you're like, funny about that is I even when I plan for you to be late, nine times out of ten, I will still beat you. And then honestly, it makes me feel good because I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_01 29:34

We talk about late, it's only in that circumstance, it's usually only by a few minutes. But yes, yes, I am always later than you. You always beat me to my house.

SPEAKER_03 29:42

It's weird, but it makes me feel good because it's the only time I'm ever not the late one.

SPEAKER_01 29:47

It made me feel good when I pulled it today and did not see your card. Yes. I beat her.

SPEAKER_03 29:51

You did beat me.

SPEAKER_01 29:52

It's weird that we're having a race to my house.

SPEAKER_03 29:54

Yeah, but it's like it's an it's a thing that we don't really speak about, but we both know it's happening.

SPEAKER_01 30:00

Literally, because I pulled it up, like, do I see your card? Nope. Good. Yes. I did it. I did it.

SPEAKER_03 30:08

But overall, historically, I'm I'm winning. Always, yes. I'm winning. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 30:12

Yeah, I don't make you wait long, but I definitely you always beat me. But that's okay. Besides the point.

SPEAKER_03 30:17

For some reason, I think that I live 20 minutes away from everything, but I definitely live 30 minutes away from everything.

SPEAKER_01 30:24

So Therein lies the problem.

SPEAKER_03 30:26

Therein lies the problem.

SPEAKER_01 30:29

Uh hyper focused bonding when I suddenly know everything about your random entrance interest because you mentioned. I don't think I've ever really like done this.

SPEAKER_03 30:36

I do that.

SPEAKER_01 30:37

I don't morph other people's interests. I like I think I've only been with people that share my interests.

SPEAKER_03 30:46

Yes, we are different in that because you definitely you date gym dudes because you're a gym girl and that makes sense. I very I'm a weird nerd person.

SPEAKER_01 30:54

Who likes lumberjacks?

SPEAKER_03 30:56

So I yes, I that is my type, however, I've never dated my type.

SPEAKER_01 31:00

Oh, I heard a term today and it made me think about boy aquarium. We need to take you to a boy aquarium. What the fuck is that? Hockey. It's a hockey game. A boy aquarium.

SPEAKER_03 31:16

What in the Okay, I am old because I understand there's the relation to there's fish in the sea. No, like because they're behind the glass. Wow. Okay. Literal, quite literal. What generation came up with this?

SPEAKER_01 31:36

I don't know, but I heard it and I was like, this sounds like somewhere Lacey needs to go. So funny.

SPEAKER_03 31:40

I do like watching hockey. I like it when they fight because it's manly. I want a manly man. I do.

SPEAKER_01 31:45

I knew you were gonna love it. I do want a manly man. Downside, they basically all have fake teeth, but you know, I heard they have a cosmetic dentist on staff. And yeah. Jen's attention.

SPEAKER_03 32:01

Teeth is an issue for me. I'm not gonna lie. Like, if if you're all fake, at least they're mad. If you're gonna have sexy teeth, then no thank you. No, thank you. No, thank you. No, I do want a manly man, though. I'm not really great at being feminine, but like I wanna be.

SPEAKER_01 32:16

I wanna be.

SPEAKER_02 32:22

I do! I wanna be awesome.

SPEAKER_01 32:24

I think you're good at it. I think sometimes I'm more like tomboy-ish than you are. I think sometimes you're more girly than I am.

SPEAKER_03 32:31

I would say it de yes, it depends on what you're looking at. Obviously, if you're looking at like looks, like physical looks, you were definitely more girly than I am. You're good at the makeup and the hair and the picking out an outfit, and that's a lot of work for me. Um, but if you're looking at like strength, like yeah, you're more manly than me because you can like do shit that I absolutely fucking could not do. Like, I am a weak lean. I am a pathetic weak lean. Weak lean. I am such a weak lean. Like, that's why I need a big strong man. So I can be the weak little girl that I need to be able to do.

SPEAKER_01 33:07

So we need to take you to the boy aquarium.

SPEAKER_03 33:10

I really don't think that's like how you get one, though.

SPEAKER_01 33:13

Like, we'll find you one there. I'm gonna be like, anyone want this one? This one right here. She's up for grabs. Uh no, I'm not, I'm not dating. We could just auction you off and we could take the proceeds. No, no, no.

SPEAKER_03 33:30

Listen. All right.

SPEAKER_01 33:31

I have a new business proposition for you.

SPEAKER_03 33:34

No, I another thing that I will continuously shut you down on. Shall we start it? Will not let you auction me off. Just for a date. Just for one date. Do you know how bad that would be for me? Absolutely not money. Because I know the only people that are gonna bid on that, and I've already told them no. So, no, thank you. I am not for sale.

SPEAKER_01 33:56

Not for sale for a dinner.

SPEAKER_03 33:58

No, no, because then my whole like people-pleasingness will come in and they're gonna get the wrong idea, and then I'm gonna have to break up with somebody four times because I'm not even dating and I do it.

SPEAKER_01 34:12

I keep forgetting. I keep forgetting it's coming back to me now. You can't be trusted because you willingly went to a trailer that had an outporch covered with, I don't know, a building made of beer boxes. That's still like yeah, best, and you still went inside. I still went on the whole date. Yeah, you can't be trusted. You can't. You could have at any point in time sent me the fucking hot dog emoji and I would have called you. Oh, that's like the emergency emoji with me and my kids. You send me the hot dog, I'm gonna call you. I didn't even know that. That's funny. You can't just send me a hot dog and I'll be like, I'm dying, and you're the only one that can fix it. So please come help.

SPEAKER_03 34:48

That's good to know that I have a permanent out.

SPEAKER_01 34:51

I would show up. I will show up and you know it, and I will be like, hi, I'm dying. She needs to take it.

SPEAKER_03 34:58

I would never participate in an auction. No way. That would be very bad. I would sit there with you.

SPEAKER_01 35:05

I would sit there with you.

SPEAKER_03 35:07

That doesn't say for you to go on a couple of things. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 35:11

I'm like, I'll go with you.

SPEAKER_03 35:13

Especially because the way the lighting is on your face because your phone is beneath you and it's dark in the room. And so it's literally illuminating just the scary bits of your face as you're like, I'll go with you.

SPEAKER_01 35:24

I'll go with you. How would I dress you too like that one time? That one time. I'm not your Barbie don't. I think about it. I'm too old. I know. It was really fun though. I I know. I was dying laughing.

SPEAKER_03 35:37

I'm glad you enjoyed doing it.

SPEAKER_01 35:38

Because you just kept doing it and you were you looked.

SPEAKER_03 35:40

Because I'm a fucking people pleaser. You looked amazing in the photo. No. The fact that he had like a mun. I hate man buns so much. And he had a sprout. Thank you. It was not even. I do not listen.

SPEAKER_01 35:55

What do you call it then a spru?

SPEAKER_03 35:57

I don't like sprout bun?

SPEAKER_01 35:59

Sprum.

SPEAKER_03 36:03

It was bad. Oh, but you looked at it. It was everything that I wrote that I didn't want in one package. It was weird that that's what you could find for me. And also, like very on brand. Very on brand. Very fucking on brand.

SPEAKER_01 36:17

I'm like, with your luck, you thought this would work and you paid for this.

SPEAKER_00 36:21

I made a haunted tours.

SPEAKER_03 36:24

And then I've got to be a good one.

SPEAKER_01 36:25

It should have been like girls getting rid of it.

SPEAKER_03 36:28

It was supposed to be like a photo.

SPEAKER_01 36:30

Me and you went on a date.

SPEAKER_03 36:31

Me and you went on a date after.

SPEAKER_01 36:32

Dressed identical. Because I thought that's cool. I look back at my choices now and I'm like, what were you thinking?

SPEAKER_03 36:45

Seriously, I think I'm like, I've lived so many lives in this one life. It's crazy. Like, how did all of these things happen to one singular fucking person?

SPEAKER_01 36:54

The lives that we've lived together. So weird. We've gone through many, many cycles.

SPEAKER_03 37:00

So many.

SPEAKER_01 37:02

That one was funny. That was my uh black bodysuit, tight jeans, Gucci belt era. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 37:10

Yep, that was the exact outfit. And then you like I feathered my hair. It was big.

SPEAKER_01 37:15

Yeah, I gave you some volume.

SPEAKER_03 37:18

It was it was a whole thing.

SPEAKER_01 37:19

Yep. I gave you my shoes. See, you needed me because mid-photo shoot, I took my shoes off and gave them to you. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 37:28

You remember like the whole thing.

SPEAKER_01 37:31

I do. It was great. And great for you.

SPEAKER_03 37:35

I did not have a good time.

unknown 37:37

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 37:39

Um, afterwards was so funny when he tried messaging you and we were already on a date. No. Oh, okay. The other guy.

SPEAKER_03 37:47

He did, didn't he? See, I don't this is the thing, right? Like, I know that I've been through weird things. It was very entertaining.

SPEAKER_01 37:56

When you paid for it, I was gonna get full entertainment from it. So I remember all of it. It was like a live action play that you were involved in.

SPEAKER_03 38:03

That I was the star of it. Yes. I'm like, this is great.

SPEAKER_01 38:06

You are distracting me from life. I love this.

SPEAKER_03 38:09

I was like during that time. Yes, it was like post Luke. During the spiral.

SPEAKER_01 38:13

It was post-Luke, very after like very much after Luke.

SPEAKER_03 38:16

We are just gonna refer to that time as the spiral because it it Yes.

SPEAKER_01 38:20

That was my griefy days where I'm like, anything that I can do to make myself happy in the moment.

SPEAKER_03 38:26

Anything you wanted to do. I took off two days of work every single week for three months.

SPEAKER_01 38:32

We had so many fun activities.

SPEAKER_03 38:40

We did so many activities. We did so many activities. Dude, we did so much.

SPEAKER_01 38:48

We ended up in a lot of strange places.

SPEAKER_03 38:52

I was laying on the floor of a bar with a dog. You yelled at me about my face. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 38:59

Going to that bar. You piss me off sometime. I was like, I don't have anything on either. Fuck off. I don't have any makeup on. Okay. Um. That's really it on this one. Okay, yeah. No, I like our little spiral. Those were like, oh, questions. I got sidetracked with the questions. But yes, no, our little spiral time was fun. We had not fun, but there was moments of like There were moments of fun. Now that I look back on it, I can laugh hysterically, thinking like I just didn't want to feel any of the awful feelings that I was feeling.

SPEAKER_03 39:37

And we made sure that the biggest thing I think was so much happened in such a short amount of time. And so, like, you know what I mean? Like, that was the triggering event that started so many, like, you almost got put in a mental institution. And like, you know what I mean? Like, so many and then actually like that's the Bunko slash jazz club night. And then you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 40:03

I did not deserve any part of the mental institution.

SPEAKER_03 40:06

But that wasn't my point.

SPEAKER_01 40:08

But the Bunkho incident, I had every part in. I'm sorry. I don't even remember playing Bunko that night.

SPEAKER_03 40:14

I don't either.

SPEAKER_01 40:15

And it was at my house.

SPEAKER_03 40:16

I do not either. It forced they changed our Bunko group to a sober bunko group after that for years. They literally just started having allowing alcohol again like a couple of months ago.

SPEAKER_01 40:28

To be fair, it was not the alcohol that put us over the edge. That was not the problem. That was not the problem. I love that for them that they think that was the problem, but that was not the problem.

SPEAKER_03 40:39

To be fair, I was the problem. And we ended up at the end.

SPEAKER_01 40:45

And so did Roll Up.

SPEAKER_03 40:47

Yep. 100%. That's so funny. That was a weird, but it was a short time.

SPEAKER_01 40:57

I have a video of Sydney flinging her hair on the stage of State Line from that night.

SPEAKER_03 41:03

Oh I haven't seen her in forever.

SPEAKER_01 41:05

I just saw her not very long ago.

unknown 41:07

That's fine.

SPEAKER_01 41:08

At one of the bodybuilding shows.

SPEAKER_03 41:09

So much happened in such a short time. All of the times at the Airbnb.

SPEAKER_01 41:15

So many.

SPEAKER_03 41:15

You could pick any number of them. So yeah, lots, lots that happen.

SPEAKER_01 41:22

I did mushrooms and turned the Airbnb up to 86 degrees, and Jill got real mad at me. Yeah. Because she was the only sober one. And then Sydney's like, why do you keep turning the heat up? I'm like, because I'm cold. Because I'm cold. I literally, they were so mad at me. That's fair. I'm like, and I saw no problem with it. I probably I'm like, I'm cold.

SPEAKER_03 41:49

I know. I'll layer, layer, layer blankets, blankets, blankets. And then all of a sudden you're just really hot. You're like, yes. Yep. It's an indicator, then you know.

SPEAKER_01 41:58

I don't know. I just got cold. But okay, so five unhinged questions to ask your best friend.

SPEAKER_03 42:05

Uh-oh.

SPEAKER_01 42:06

What's the dumbest thing we've gotten away with? Oh.

SPEAKER_03 42:15

Literally that whole time with roll-up. I mean, if you think about to be honest, like we were not smart during that time. Like, I was driving drunk all the time. We were doing not legal activities. We like and we just didn't give a shit. Like, we weren't taking precautions. We you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 42:36

Like, we went on a podcast fucked up. We made our first podcast debut completely high.

SPEAKER_03 42:43

Like, beyond. Like, I we were late because we were getting. We didn't know we were gonna be on until we got there. And I don't know if that's because we didn't know or if it's because we got so messed up that we forgot.

SPEAKER_01 42:57

That was on you. You were talking to him first, I think, right?

SPEAKER_03 42:59

Like, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 43:01

I don't remember.

SPEAKER_03 43:02

That was a weird time in my life.

SPEAKER_01 43:06

Like I just assumed you knew. The fact that I just like blindly roll along with everything, like Mega Aries just rolls in. Yeah. Takes out.

SPEAKER_03 43:15

Do you want to know how me and him met? Did we ever talk about it?

SPEAKER_01 43:19

I think we did, but I don't remember.

SPEAKER_03 43:21

Like, I literally I went to the comedy club and he did an opening act, and I thought he was funny, and then like we found each other on Tinder.

SPEAKER_01 43:31

That's awkward.

SPEAKER_03 43:32

I know. He's probably the only dude I've ever actually met off of Tinder. And we had like a date or whatever, and I was me, and I was drunk at the time, so I got wasted, and you can get me talking, obviously. I can't shut the fuck up. That's why we have a podcast. So we're talking or whatever, and I I'm telling him crazy life stories about like my polygamous family and all of the things. And you know me, I turned literally everything into the joke. Not thinking I'm on a date with a fucking comedian who's probably definitely gonna use this for material.

SPEAKER_01 44:06

He definitely did.

SPEAKER_03 44:07

We usually I don't think he did. I don't think he did. And that made me I have like mad respect for him that he didn't take any of and he could have he could have fucking roasted me and it would have been fair.

SPEAKER_01 44:18

Good. Now we can do it here. I know.

SPEAKER_03 44:20

Now I just do it to myself, it's fine.

SPEAKER_01 44:23

Okay, so yeah, the dumbest thing we've gotten away with. Um, I do have to say it was probably the time that I broke the beer bottle and you guys all got me out of there so quick.

SPEAKER_02 44:32

Dude.

SPEAKER_01 44:32

Because when does that happen? I still don't know if it actually happened, but the fact that both like you and my brother told me about it, I was like, that never happened. And then you told me the exact same story, and I'm like, oh the fuck, it did happen. I remember being like, Justin, you always exaggerate shit, like whatever. He's like, Do you remember what you did?

SPEAKER_03 44:51

Do you even realize that Lacey's not here?

SPEAKER_01 44:55

Um, I woke up with my romper on backwards. And that was a really awful choice because not only was it on backwards, it was a okay, it was a short romper and it had long sleeves and it fastened in the back. There was like a button that fastened in the back. But I somehow, in that night, decided that I was gonna take it all the way off, put it back on, backwards, and then commit to the button. No, no, no, no, I don't. Um, and I'm like, what the fuck? So that's the first thing. I go to the bathroom and wake up. I'm like, why is my romper? Oh my god, right? And I'm like, and then I'm so drunk I still fasten it up in the back. I don't even leave it unfastened. I have fastened a little button around my neck that should be in the back of my neck, but it's now underneath my chin. Okay, so that then I'm like, where is Lacey? And Justin's like, I don't know. She left. I'm like, she what? I did leave. I fucking left your ass. You deserved it though. I lost my wallet. I lost my phone.

SPEAKER_03 45:57

And I s I lost my phone twice. We got it back the first time, and then I lost it again in the same trip, and then it was gone.

SPEAKER_01 46:08

Whenever I hung out with my brother, it was always a very wild time.

SPEAKER_03 46:11

I've only we hung out that time, and then there was that one time where we had like a friends giving at your house. And then we ended up going out. And it was just me, you, your brother, uh, I can't remember the girl's name, but we knew her. And then some random dude that I saw a photo and I was like, I still don't know who the fuck that is.

SPEAKER_01 46:30

Oh my gosh, what was her name?

SPEAKER_03 46:32

I'm still friends with her on Facebook, but I honestly in this moment could not remember.

SPEAKER_01 46:37

No, I don't either.

SPEAKER_03 46:40

No?

SPEAKER_01 46:40

I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 46:41

I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 46:41

Anyways, um, yeah. The nanwey.

SPEAKER_03 46:45

That was like the only two times. And your brother was a creeper.

unknown 46:50

Sorry.

SPEAKER_01 46:50

She would get drunk and he definitely like tried. I don't know. I wasn't a part of that.

SPEAKER_03 46:57

I literally woke up to him hovering me trying to kiss me. Do you remember that? Because I fucking remember.

SPEAKER_01 47:04

I was asleep. I'm pretty sure Cinderella.

SPEAKER_03 47:07

I was in the same bed next to me.

SPEAKER_01 47:09

That's creepy.

SPEAKER_03 47:10

Yes, it was creepy. That whole fucking weekend.

SPEAKER_01 47:14

Justin, I mean you're dead now, but Justin. I shouldn't laugh at that. No, but honestly, he like whatever. It's fine. It's fine. He was going through a rough time.

SPEAKER_02 47:28

See, we wouldn't have all these memories if we got rid of a year. He had just gotten divorced.

SPEAKER_01 47:33

He had gotten divorced.

SPEAKER_02 47:35

Divorced?

SPEAKER_01 47:36

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 47:37

He was married more than once?

SPEAKER_01 47:39

Yeah, he got married to this first wife.

SPEAKER_02 47:42

I don't even think I knew that.

SPEAKER_01 47:43

Maggie. He was with Maggie, who was with her all the time.

SPEAKER_02 47:46

We've only been friends for 12 years.

SPEAKER_03 47:47

I didn't know. Because my brother never came around. No, he didn't.

SPEAKER_01 47:50

And he was always like off doing other stuff.

SPEAKER_03 47:52

Most people don't even know that I have a second sister.

SPEAKER_01 47:55

Or a brother. She's the not fun one. Uh-oh. Does she listen to this?

SPEAKER_03 47:59

No, I I don't even think she knows I have one, to be honest. That's how much we don't talk about.

SPEAKER_01 48:04

That's all I know her as. I actually don't know her name. I just know her as the not fun one. And I just figured that's all I need to know. I save my brain space. That works. I don't need to know. Apparently I'm not gonna meet her. Jen's the only one I need to know about. Yep. Although Jen's off living her life, so I might shove that one off too. And then what are we gonna call her? She's the f oh, the fun. The off one. The off being married one. The married one. It would just be the married one. No, she is. Um, we need to have her back on too. Uh, next question. What's the weirdest thing you've caught me doing that I still don't know about? That's weird that I just read that without even reading it in my head first. To like, because I would have not. That one's weird. Because I know about everything.

SPEAKER_03 48:48

I don't think I've ever caught you doing something. Like you know everything. I don't hide anything.

SPEAKER_01 48:52

No, we know everything.

SPEAKER_03 48:53

And we're not we message each other about the shit that we don't see.

SPEAKER_01 48:57

I know.

SPEAKER_03 48:58

So I don't think I have an answer.

SPEAKER_01 49:01

What wild story do you think I'd tell my grandkids about our friendship?

SPEAKER_03 49:08

You know what one might be funny, at least I think is funny. Um, do you remember when you hit the curb?

SPEAKER_01 49:16

No.

SPEAKER_03 49:16

And you've busted your fucking rim?

SPEAKER_01 49:19

Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm like, I'm still just gonna.

SPEAKER_03 49:31

Just continue to drive home. Fucked up, tire, like super hella fucked up with your burrito, just fucking happy as a clam.

SPEAKER_01 49:38

It's fine. Just kept driving. Didn't even stop. I don't think no, I did stop.

SPEAKER_03 49:43

I pulled into a parking lot and then I was like, But I mean like when you hit it, like you hit it and you just kept going, and then you're like, Yes, because I'm like, I'm not stopping at this point in time.

SPEAKER_01 49:51

We're gonna go at a parking lot, we're gonna get a little far away. Oh. It's most ants. At least it was just that. That was that was so long ago.

SPEAKER_03 50:00

Right, because I don't feel like you're gonna want to tell the grandkids something fucking like the time that we ended up at the strip club. Yeah, we're not dying.

SPEAKER_01 50:08

I'm not sure. No, that was actually not fun. There's no like our grandchildren. We actually didn't end up at a strip club. I make it sound like it's so much more exactly. It's like we live in fucking Spokane, Washington. It was state line and it was the Contiki. It wasn't even the strip club. Did we even go into the strip club?

SPEAKER_03 50:24

Yes, we did.

SPEAKER_01 50:25

Oh.

SPEAKER_03 50:26

We were not there very long, but yes, we did. Because I'm pretty sure um Christmas tree. Yes, and that's when we ran into Fiddle Faddles X.

SPEAKER_01 50:39

Yes, who I saw not. How weird is that? I'm about I don't remember any of this because I Were we separated. Okay, well, I'm at Walmart checking, I'm getting stuff for like my first show for Miami, Miami Pro. I'm like getting stuff that I need like random few things, and he's like Heather, and I turn around and I'm like, I have no idea who the person's like, hey, you don't remember me.

SPEAKER_03 51:03

And I'm like the only interaction y'all ever had that he only knows who you are because you're in like tagged photos with me, probably. I don't think he would remember that.

SPEAKER_01 51:12

I know I was like, oh, I don't remember any of it. He's like, Yeah, you were pretty fucked up.

SPEAKER_03 51:16

I'm like, I don't that time in my life. I definitely that was the goal. That was the goal.

SPEAKER_01 51:21

I didn't want to feel anything.

SPEAKER_03 51:23

That was the same night that we the the mistake that we made was that we split up.

SPEAKER_01 51:29

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 51:31

We should have known better. But we both both of our nights went awry when we split up, and we like, and then the next morning I didn't sleep at all, and that's like a whole story, and like it got weird, and like fiddlefaddles ex kissed me even though he was there with my stepsister. It got fucking weird, and then his roommate tried to sleep with me. It was a weird night for me, and that was the night that you ended up at Christmas tree's house, and then I had to try to pick you up in the morning, and then it sent me the wrong address, and like that all was the same day. Do you realize that? That was less than a 24-hour period. Do you want to know what I realized?

SPEAKER_01 52:07

Is like I went to sleep and you lived a whole life.

SPEAKER_03 52:13

Yep, I have a whole nother story that occurred.

SPEAKER_01 52:17

Mine ended. Mine ended. I found a bed and went to sleep. Mine ended.

SPEAKER_02 52:23

Yeah, that's the difference. We are not the same.

SPEAKER_01 52:25

It's so funny. I literally remember, like, we would just roll up would end up taking us to so many random different fucking places on the quest to get to where we were going. I'm like, I thought we were going to this. How did we end up over here? Yes, I'm like, I'm not getting in the car with you anymore.

SPEAKER_03 52:41

You've taken us to the car. All the time you would, though. I know. You'd say you wouldn't, and then you would, you'd have me fucking drive all the way out to pick you up.

SPEAKER_01 52:48

I appreciate all the sober drivers that drove me around during my grief time while I was getting fucked up. Thank you very much. Roll up kept me being really fucking sidetracked, though. Yes. Although, how was he conveniently always around? Yes. Tell me how there was this one time I was with, it was really sketched. My phone died. I was downtown. I'm like, I have Louis Vuitton on my 24-inch extensions. I'm like, I didn't not be walking around down here. I was with, what's her name? The one that tried to get me in the fucking shit, the mental institution.

SPEAKER_03 53:21

Oh. I don't know why for some reason I thought you were talking about the aggressive list. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 53:26

We don't really say her name, do we?

SPEAKER_03 53:27

Uh no. Uh do we just call her what was it, AMR?

SPEAKER_01 53:31

Yes, we'll do that. Okay, yes.

SPEAKER_03 53:32

Is that what it was? Yeah, I know who you mean. Oh, okay. I was like exactly who you meant.

SPEAKER_01 53:38

Okay, yes, I of course you do.

SPEAKER_03 53:41

Microphone cover, like mouth the name to me to make sure we were on the same page.

SPEAKER_01 53:45

Of course you do, because you also got traumatized. Okay, and she was it was a fake friend situation, and he was a real friend. We're like, anyways, um, where was I going with that? Something about AMR lady. What the fuck?

SPEAKER_03 54:03

Where did it go? ADHD in real time, ladies and gentlemen. Where did it go?

SPEAKER_01 54:07

What were we talking about?

SPEAKER_03 54:09

I don't remember.

SPEAKER_01 54:09

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 54:10

We were talking about roll up.

SPEAKER_01 54:12

Yes, we were downtown. Okay. I'm with her. She's like, I'm we're gonna hang out, we're gonna have whatever. So she goes and like meets some cop that she knows, and then I'm like, we're downtown. And I'm like, I don't want to sit in the back of the seat of the cop car with you when you're anyways. She was strange. So she's like fucked up. We went to a comedy show, and then she's just like walking around downtown and roll up literally randomly rolls up.

SPEAKER_02 54:36

Randomly rolls up.

SPEAKER_01 54:37

And I'm like, this is the one time I am getting in the car with you because I don't want to be dead. He's like, Why are you downtown? I'm like, I don't know. My phone's dead. She brought us down here. I don't know. I don't know. But that was the only time that I was thankful that he rolled up. And I was like, also, how the hell are you down here right now? We went to a comedy uh comedy show.

SPEAKER_03 54:55

That is weird that he showed up. But also, good on you for like realizing that you shouldn't be down there because I'm naive as shit. And there was one time when I went to nine and I needed or uh fat Roger asked for like a fucking Red Bull or something. Five hour energy.

SPEAKER_01 55:10

And no, I walked you did not drive.

SPEAKER_03 55:12

You walked I walked from nine two miles in high heels. That's a personal choice. In a red, like skimpy ass dress trying to find him a fucking five-hour energy and no places open. And not once was I like, huh? And I had two cars stop and offer me a ride.

SPEAKER_01 55:29

Yeah, because you were wearing a red dress and heels.

SPEAKER_03 55:31

I didn't even think about it.

SPEAKER_01 55:32

You were wearing a red dress and heels.

SPEAKER_03 55:34

I literally looked like a lady of the night. I know I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_01 55:37

100% did.

SPEAKER_03 55:38

Dumb as fuck. I remember I get back and he was so mad at me, and but I was so fucked up. I didn't like I didn't feel like I was in any danger. And I get back and he's so mad at me. And then I was like, why are you mad? No, he was pissed.

SPEAKER_01 55:50

Yeah, but not for that.

SPEAKER_03 55:50

Because I didn't tell him I was leaving and my I love my heels. It's controlling, so like he had to know where I was, but yeah, I'm la la la. So fucking dumb. Drunk and dumb, thinking this is safe.

SPEAKER_01 56:05

If you got arrested one night, what would I assume you did?

SPEAKER_03 56:12

Something in a car.

SPEAKER_01 56:17

Something in a car because you're always in your car?

SPEAKER_03 56:20

I'm well, or like speeding, or I hit something because I'm distracted driver. Okay. I don't know. Because I don't do anything. Um, this was a couple years ago, I could come up with some creative answers, but I'm so lame now. That's why it's so weird to me to think back on memories when we did crazy shit like that, because I'm so not that person now.

SPEAKER_01 56:42

Mine would be just like somebody probably just really pissed Mega Aries off.

SPEAKER_03 56:48

I don't know. I know I agree with that. I feel like I would think that you got in like an assault charge.

SPEAKER_01 56:55

An assault charge.

SPEAKER_03 56:56

I was trying to think of a nicer way to say it.

SPEAKER_01 57:00

I would think that I would have an assault charge. That would be my name. Like, I am so nice. I've never been in a fight. Although I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_03 57:06

I know out of the two of us, I'm the one who's been. I know. Of course.

SPEAKER_01 57:10

I'm the one that broke the beer bottle. You guys took me away because that was probably a good thing.

SPEAKER_03 57:14

Yes, because that like you would have gone to jail.

SPEAKER_01 57:18

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 57:19

For sure. Mine was like high school.

SPEAKER_01 57:22

I just like, yeah. I guess that aggressive- I haven't been like angry in a long time. So that's good. That's good. That's good. I don't put myself in situations where weird men can grab my ass. That was like, I'm pretty sure what the the culprit of that situation was. Correct.

SPEAKER_03 57:36

I do feel like if this was the one.

SPEAKER_01 57:38

But that was a little bit of an exaggerated response, I'm not gonna lie.

SPEAKER_03 57:42

Yes. You went from zero to a hundred, really.

SPEAKER_01 57:46

That's me though. If I feel disrespected, I don't know why I get so angry, but like that's why I would assume that.

SPEAKER_03 57:52

See, I wouldn't think you started it, but I do think that you would have been the one charged.

SPEAKER_01 57:58

Like, it's different because I can let a lot of shit go, but I feel like when it's intentional life, like when I feel like someone intentionally does something to me or someone I really love or care about, I just get a certain kind of like angry. Yeah. Fair. Make angry. Honestly, though. Mega Aries. On that note. Mega Aries, don't let the Mega Aries out. Okay. Like, subscribe, give us five stars. All the things. Um, send us a fan mail. What do you want to hear? Yeah, give us suggestions. What do you want to hear? What do you want to talk about? Do you want to come on?

SPEAKER_03 58:35

That would be fun. We haven't had a guest in a while.

SPEAKER_01 58:37

No, we haven't. We should do that. All right. Well, till next time. Bye. Bye. That was so anticlimactic. Bye, everyone. I can't even push the button, so we're still gonna say goodbye. Hello. Goodbye. Goodbye. You have to say goodbye again, or it's weird. I couldn't end it that way. Okay. And I can't cut it off now. We've come so far. We've come too far. Goodbye. Goodbye.