The Winning Mindset: Kelly Siegel on Business, Lifestyle & Discipline

In this episode of Dual Coast Podcast, we sit down with entrepreneur, speaker, and podcast host Kelly Siegel for a powerful conversation about fitness, lifestyle, discipline, motivation, and the mindset required to achieve success.

Kelly opens up about his journey growing up, the challenges he faced early in life, and how those experiences shaped the drive and resilience that helped him build a successful career. Through discipline, consistency, and a commitment to personal growth, Kelly transformed adversity into opportunity and built a life centered around purpose, health, and leadership.

This episode dives deep into the habits and philosophies that separate those who succeed from those who stay stuck. Kelly shares why fitness plays a critical role in mental strength, how discipline fuels long-term success, and why motivation alone isn’t enough to reach your goals.

If you're looking to improve your mindset, build better habits, and push yourself toward a higher level of success, this conversation delivers real and practical insight.

In this episode we discuss:
• Kelly Siegel’s upbringing and life experiences that shaped his mindset
• The importance of fitness and health in building discipline
• Why motivation fades but discipline creates lasting success
• Lessons learned from building businesses and overcoming setbacks
• Creating a lifestyle centered around growth, accountability, and purpose

Kelly’s story is a reminder that where you start does not determine where you finish.. discipline, belief, and consistent effort can change everything.

🎙 About Dual Coast Podcast
Dual Coast Podcast brings together entrepreneurs, leaders, athletes, and innovators from across the country to talk about mindset, discipline, health, entrepreneurship, and personal growth. Hosted from both coasts, the show is dedicated to sharing stories and strategies that inspire people to level up in every area of life.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:02

Good morning, Dual Coast fans. Welcome back to another episode of Dual Coast Podcast. I'm your host, Dan Skoka, joining my co-host on the West Coast, Russ Rogers, and very special guest this morning, Mr. Kelly Siegel. Kelly, thank you so much for being on this morning.

SPEAKER_02 0:15

I'm kind of the Oreo cookie here, man. Thanks for having me. I'm in between. So you got New York, you got uh California, and I'm in between in Michigan. So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 0:27

Not only that, but we're both wearing black, and you're the white Oreo in the middle.

SPEAKER_02 0:33

I didn't even think of that. That's that's funny.

SPEAKER_00 0:37

Oh, that is awesome, man. We're so glad to have you. It's great.

SPEAKER_02 0:41

It's really good to see you guys, and it's good to see you thriving, Russ, and everything you've set your mind to, you've uh you're achieving and you're becoming, and I'm proud of you, and I'm a big fan.

SPEAKER_00 0:52

I appreciate it. Thank you so much, man. Well, you know, we uh we talked some time ago, we met uh through Craig Siegel. Um, and it's just amazing to to see you know the growth and everything. But I I my my opening question to you, right? My opening question to you is do most newspaper boys become successful?

SPEAKER_02 1:16

Well, that is a it's a major research on me. So the backstory on that is I lied uh and said I was 13 years old when I was 11 to get a paper route. And they had this promotion going on that they were paying, I don't remember what it was, but I want to say five dollars a new customer, new subscriber. Um, so I had I inherited a paper route that I lied about, and they had 40 subscribers, and I went and doubled it to 80 because I wanted to get it was either five dollars or ten dollars, whatever it was, was a lot of money for a 11-year-old kid. What I didn't realize is I was doing that out of survival, like out of scarcity and fear. And I built a multi-million dollar business on scarcity and fear. So I would tell you this much I do think anybody that goes door to door and hustles, you learn a different kind of um skill. So, on top of going door to door building a paper out, I sold candy. Um, I worked at a car wash, so I did a lot of things to while maintaining a 4.0 grade point average, by the way, to survive. And that's one hell of a motivator, is really it was just to eat. There was my parents were alcoholics, never around, uh, out drinking. I was to be seen and not heard, and really I was a slave, so they made me do work and work and work. And if I did anything wrong, I was beat. So you build this resiliency and you you build this thick skin, and what happens is if you use it and you weaponize it, you can become very successful monetarily wise. But until you do the inner work, which is what I'm doing right now, you will hit a ceiling that you don't see, and then we talked about it before we record you have to unbecome that that person who lives in that their identity is fear and scarcity, and it's hard to notice when you're look successful on the outside. So the long story short, Ross, is I think anybody that lies and has to go get a paper out on a scarcity to feed themselves are gonna be successful because there's a level of drive in them that you you can't manifest, you can't even build it, it just has to happen. And and that built uh when I got that, I I I think it was like 90 bucks, I thought I was rich at 11, and all I could see was food, and that's a it put something, it buried something in me like ooh, money equals safety and freedom, but I built it the wrong way, but I built it the wrong way. Uh, what that that gave me a lot of freedom until I'm on becoming it right now, which is uh very difficult to do, especially at 50.

SPEAKER_00 4:15

Yeah, I love it, man. How how to lie at 11 and uh become successful at 50.

SPEAKER_02 4:22

Hey, win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat. I don't know, man. You know, I the funny thing about it is I remember my parents that that never were around literally telling me I couldn't couldn't get the paper out, and and I just hid it from them too, which was another thing that I learned is the little white lies and the the hidden things ain't gonna hurt anybody, but but they do. It's that's that becoming of who the man I am today. It's not what I'm teaching my daughter, but I also create space for her to communicate with me uh and present an argument. For for looking back, I know it was nothing more that they just wanted me to be there to wait on them hand in foot. It had no there was no rhyme or reason to not letting me go do this, but I didn't know the words, I didn't have the safe place to say, you know, I don't have any food. You guys don't leave me any food. There was no open line of communication to say, you know, your guys are drunks. Probably wouldn't have said wouldn't have came off well, anyways. Um, so long story short, is it I I I used it and weaponized it to make a lot of money until it wasn't I look in the mirror, it wasn't fulfilled, and then I broke it all down, and now I'm sharing it with everybody to go to the next level, the next level, the next level.

SPEAKER_00 5:37

Well, I'm not sure how you hide 80 newspapers that show up at your door. That's pretty good.

SPEAKER_02 5:44

God, you know, Russ, you're you're throwing me for a loop here. I didn't even realize you know what they just were never around, so they just didn't pay attention. So you would just as soon as they showed up, you grab them and you go go deliver them. I threw it on, and I was a smart little entrepreneur. I would recruit my buddies, yeah, and I would put them on the on the handlebars of my freaking bike, and I would have him, my buddy, throw them while I would drive, and then I would treat them to french fries, and they would be you know that's delegation before I knew what delegation was. And you know, the funniest thing is the hardest part about growing to to massive to eight, nine figures is delegating and trusting the people to do the job because I I grew up and I survived on my own, so I want to do everything alone, and I thought, oh I'm tough, I can do it. It's so wrong. You want to go fast, go alone. You want to go farther, go together. We're talking about Craig, and you know, yeah, Craig breed that into me. And through Craig, I've met I've met uh Ed Milette, I've met uh John Gordon, I met so many people, and then you guys, and it's like so success has help, but you must let it. I would push it away because I didn't trust myself or them, because the people who were closest to me, my mother and my father, my mother, my stepfather treated me like I was an afterthought, like I was garbage, and they they would tell me so, which is so weird that I got all this confidence.

SPEAKER_00 7:24

Oh, that's amazing.

SPEAKER_02 7:25

I couldn't, I totally bucked the system. I am literally, I used to call myself an alien, and it just it didn't feel right, so I'm just very uncommon, Russ. I do the darn thing uh that feels uncomfortable, and I do it until it becomes comfortable.

SPEAKER_00 7:40

Yeah, yeah. You know, I I I had a buddy, Mike, that I grew up with, and he had a paper out, you know, and he he became very successful as well. But I remember staying over, you know, his house on a weekend or something, and you know, getting up in those early morning hours and you know, stuffing the Sunday paper, you know, which was always the biggest paper, right? Because it had all the ads. So I I remember getting up with him, and and I didn't like that feeling. I didn't like waking up and do that. But one thing that people forget, especially somebody in Michigan, is weather on a bicycle, right? And having to do 40, building it up to 80 is the weather. And you still have to deliver that newspaper to people. So when you talk about being resilient, right, that's really below the surface at 11. You don't really realize it, but you're building that up within you to say, I've got to deliver no matter what.

SPEAKER_02 8:37

Yeah, uh, it's I'm like the mailman, I'm always gonna deliver, and that's really I've I've built my identity on that. And and for the, you know, I we forgot that there's a young faction of kids that don't even know what a newspaper is because you know we didn't have cell phones that we could just get uh everything right out in front of us right away across the globe. And so you had to pick up your your new your information from either watching the news or getting the newspaper. And I remember uh that was a morning ritual for me for years. I would get the newspaper, I still miss it. I do. I I can't stand looking at this device all day, every day. Yeah, and then now we don't even realize that we're just being served up exactly the same thoughts over and over so we feel like we're ripe. Um, the algorithm is is making people less expansive, and and and I invite people to listen to podcasts for people that they don't agree with, read books of people that they don't agree with. I you know, we just got on here. I I I struggle with New York, California, and Michigan politics, and not that I'm a Democrat or a Republican, I tend to just not like the system. I'm a constitutionalist, and when I look at it, I don't know. I read all of their books, all of the governor's books, because I wanted to know what they were thinking. Turns out you could tell they were ghostwritten and they were just saying how great they were, but at least I tried. I like to bring in information from people that I don't necessarily agree with because I want to find that common ground where we do agree. Because what do we all agree on? Is we agree that we love this country, we agree that we want to be happy, we agree that we like pee, that we that we that humanity is important, that kindness is gangster. Let's start there and then work our way out, and then there's certain things we're just gonna have to agree to disagree on, like uh you know, this whole Save America act. I don't know what the heck that is, but I can tell you this much. The one part of it makes sense, and there's a bunch of things that make no sense that they're burying in it. Like, how would you not need ID to vote? You it's the cut, it's a law in the country that you have to carry ID with you at all times, but not to vote. Like, that doesn't make any sense, but anyways, I don't mean to make this political, but I just was telling wanted people to realize that that there were newspapers, man, and they still exist, but they're very expensive and they're few and far between. And really, the art of reporting has become terrible. You know, you you're you're really just getting people's opinions and not the facts. That's why the Hard on Life podcast exists. Is I just want to give facts, you know. My opinions, my opinion. I just I believe hard work the harder you work, the more successful and the more lucky you get. Yeah, and that includes on your mind, Russ and and Dan. You gotta you know, money won't make you happy, but happiness will make you money. This is an inside game, and forever I avoided that. So I implore anybody, they take away anything. Look inside. I usually have a mirror, I got the little mirror that I carry around because that's that's literally the best tool in the world. Look in the mirror, man. Ain't nobody doing anything to you, you are doing it to you, and most more than likely, it was implemented and in and that operating system was implemented when you were a child and you don't even know. I had this scarcity and fear mindset that that got me successful, but what got you here will keep you here, and what got you here won't get you there.

SPEAKER_00 12:13

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's right. Very true, very true. You know, I on a much lighter note, I I I always look at uh at um Kelly Siegel whenever he's posting and you know, shirtless and everything, and I've seen his hair at Craig Siegel, you know, when it's when it's up like this, and this morning it's throwing me off, and it's so clean and and slick back, man. You just a little messed up.

SPEAKER_02 12:38

You know, I I just uh you know how you do anything is how you do everything. So I like to look presentable, but I've also gotten to the point where I really am so comfortable with my skin that I just want to be comfortable out of my skin too. I'm a big guy, I work out every day. You know, your your thing move 365. I I work out every day. I just it's the happiest part of my day, besides being on podcasts in front of a camera. And it just gets my mind, my body, and my mind right. You know, I listen to podcasts while I'm training. I'm not I'm never zoning out, I don't do much of anything that isn't advancing me. So um, you know, if you're gonna look like a bum, people are gonna treat you like a bum. That's what I I teach my daughter, I tell my daughter, they're 17 years old, and all these kids, they look like they're homeless. And it's like, you know, people are gonna judge that's what happens. Uh, you know, but you know, then I speak and I look, uh, I look uh I sound like I know what I'm talking about, even though I'm I'm a student of the game, even at 50. I'm gonna learn it all. I want to be, I want to be a sponge and learn, learn, learn, learn, learn, learn. That's awesome. Awesome, man. It's awesome.

SPEAKER_00 13:48

Valuable notes right there, man. I'm telling you. Very Kelly is bringing it. Bringing the heat. Hope everybody's listening to taking notes this morning.

SPEAKER_02 13:57

By the way, it's a great plug. Uh, if you guys want, uh, email me, Kelly at harderthanlife.com, and uh, I'll just just put dual coast and I'll send you both of copies of my book, electronic copies of my book, Harder Than Life, Happier Than Life. I'm not doing any of this, I don't have a um coaching program. I just I do all this because it's cathartic and I'm learning. And when I have a mirror in front of me, I know I gotta show up as the best version of me. So if I'm out here speeding it, spewing it, I'm gonna live it as well because I have no, I don't, I can't, I don't have a hypocritic bone in my body. And since I'm not doing it to try to make money, hopefully people listen. So I'm so I'm literally showing the proof and not the promise.

SPEAKER_00 14:42

Yeah, awesome, man. Thanks for doing that. Really appreciate that. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 14:46

My pleasure, Kelly. You brought up a really good point before before of delegation with delegation of tasks and bringing about business and everything. How important is it when you surround yourself with the right people to put the right people around you at all times in your circle? What does your circle mean to you?

SPEAKER_02 15:02

You know, everything they say is true. As you grow, your circle gets smaller because what you're gonna put up with becomes smaller. Uh, first of all, I can't be around people that that talk out of both sides of their mouth, and I'm not judging them, they think I'm judging them, but I'm not. Uh, and then my authenticity tends to cast a big shadow, and I'm a big guy, and it's just I've learned that when I say something, I do it. There is no compromising, and I learned that's very unique, and that also freaks people out. And I'm going through this, I'm working with this IFS therapist where I'm doing parts work and and and brain spotting, and I'm learning that, hey man, that's just who I am, and it's okay. I'm not, I was bringing you know, you heard Craig say playing small is canceled. I was bringing myself down to not to not offend people, and that was hurting my soul. So this is who I am. I and I there are times where I wish I could take a shortcut, but I can't. Um the last 15 days I have had nonstop anxiety. I did some work with my therapist where I unlocked something, and then my coach synced it in and it hit together, and they both challenged me. And for the first time, I'm sitting at breakfast and I had a freaking panic attack. I thought I was having a heart attack. And when Superman gets sick, everyone freaks out. So my daughter's looking at me, she's like, Dad, what I do, and I'm like, just give me a second, I'm sure this is a heart attack. And I'm like, because I did, I just I had a real sharp pain in my chest, but nothing else, no spike in the thing, no uh sweats, no flat hot, nothing. It just was a tightness in my chest. Turns out I get stress and a knot in my back, and it comes all the way through my chest, and it was just a flat out panic attack. And I've had 15 straight days of panic and anxiety. And I didn't medicate, I didn't mask it. I called my therapist, I called my coach, I've I've put it on social media because leaders go first, and I want to show that bad things don't last. And and you just literally sit in it and it'll and you'll go right straight through it. The buffalo goes right into the storm, the storm is coming at it, and it gets through it faster. Sure, I could have taken a Xanax, I could have had a drink. I don't drink anymore, so it that I couldn't have done any of it. That's the other problem. I can't, I say I could, but I can't. I I just I can't. Um, so I sat in it. Today's the first day, probably because I'm getting to see you that I feel uh I don't I feel at peace, and I'm hoping I it couldn't come a day too soon because tomorrow I'm headed out to Utah to do a keynote and I'm MC in an event, and and uh I want to show up my best self, but my best self is just a centered self, and um so it this is this is life, but you know that's when you know you're living, guys. Yeah, I I feel it. I spent 30 years masking my emotions, and I built a great company and a great life. I've done some fun things, but did I feel any of it? None of it, none of it. I've done things that people be like, whoa, that's so cool. I wasn't I was there physically, but not emotionally, and that sucks, man. When you're numbing, you numb the good things as as well as the bad things. So feeling is is feeling is healing and it won't last forever.

unknown 18:51

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 18:52

I I I appreciate your you know vulnerability and opening up and sharing, you know, with us, you know, just you know, being candid about yourself and stuff. I I I wanna I want to go back to those in-between years uh before coming, you know, the CEO and developing you know this amazing business and everything. What was it in those in-between years that you were really trying to figure out in life and where you wanted to go and some of those those obstacles that stood in the way of really launching yourself into something that you wanted to maybe ultimately become?

SPEAKER_02 19:30

You're getting me some good questions, getting me ready for tomorrow. Um what was I chasing? I was chasing, you know, we all think we're chasing success, and then you get a little bit of significance and you realize success doesn't taste the same. So I I survived, make no mistake about it. I survived hell growing up. I was make no I just worked on this, so this is the first podcast I'm gonna say this. I was terrified as a child. I so what I did to survive is I pushed those feelings down and said I was just a scared little boy, and then I was tough harder than life, and I'd said I used all my fear up when I was a kid. Bullshit. That was that was my crutch that I story that I told myself so I could be achieve a couple of bucks in my pocket. And now that I'm really looking at it, going, I I I've been working at that little boy who was terrified, and I'm I'm calming him down, which allows me to be calmer. Which, if you're watching my content, you just see a different version of me coming out. And uh my coach challenged me because he knows that my boy is Ed Milet, and he's like, You're gonna be bigger than Ed Milette, which I keep telling him coming. So I and I'm like, I've covered it. And really, it isn't to be, I gotta put a goal so I know where my end goal or where you know begin with the end in mind, but truthfully, I just want to help people, you know. I I want the the person that is performing instead of living to say, I watched Kelly on their pod on the dual coast podcast. I want to I want to follow more and I want to learn more because he went first because there's a lot of me out there where they're just performing and they're not feeling, and they know that there's so much more out there, and and so what was I running? I you don't know until you stop and you look in the mirror and you say, What is my life and what do I want it to be? When I'm 80 years old, what do I want my life to look like? And at the end, when I'm when I'm dying, I take my last breath, I want to sit there and think, okay, this is the man I am, and this is the man I wanted to be, and I wanted to be the same person. Um, because regrets are a mother scratcher, and I've got a lot of regrets. I've done a lot of stupid things in my life. And people that sit back and just say, I have no regrets because everything happened for you. And I believe that everything does happen for you, but God, the universe source keeps sending you lessons until you learn them. And that and they were sending me a lesson thrust to freaking not drink, not party, and just learn and do good and give back over and over and over. And I wasn't listening. So they sent me this thing called the pandemic and made me sit by myself. And then on top of it, the weirdest thing happened. It's in my book, Harder Than Life. The weirdest thing happened, my ex-girlfriend, my ex- uh wife got together and they took away my daughter and made up some bullshit story. So I literally had to sit by myself with nobody in my feelings. And I was about a year, a little over a year into my healing journey. And there is nothing more scary than to be completely by yourself with your thoughts and feelings and have nothing and not know what tomorrow's gonna bring. Because if you remember the early days of the pandemic, which we're coming up to, it's March 10th today. March 20th's when the whole world sat down. So 10 more days I got with the whole our country sat shut down. My business was shut down. We lost our biggest customer who went out of business. And my my daughter got taken away from me all at four o'clock on March 20th, 2020. And I literally was sitting here alone, like, what am I gonna do? And that was a pivotal moment. You turn right, and all hell breaks loose. You turn left, all hell breaks loose. If you just sit in your shit, you're gonna be okay. And uh luckily I just sat in the shit, and uh, that's what really turned me in. And it's where harder than life was born. I wrote my book during the pandemic, I declared war on my mind and my body, and I used that pandemic where most people were drinking and loving the remote work. I was grinding. I ripped my IT comp IT cybersecurity company apart, built it, implemented EOS, started the delegation, and really started the mindfulness work. I hired my first emotional intelligence coach, I started doing hypnotherapy, uh uh EMDR therapy. I literally did more during that pandemic than I probably done ever till right now, where I'm I'm grinding on myself. But then I went, what what were we like? We're six years later. I went on a six-year frickin' like grind, grind, grind, and I'm looking, I realized I hadn't made it any further. And I looks like we have we got a lot of followers. We got uh, you know, we've we've done coaching, we wrote two books, we got a top podcast, but I still don't the mission is incomplete, uh, which is funny because I was looking at my journal the other day from that time, and I literally journaled and prayed to God for the life I have right now. And what did I do? I move the goalposts because we with more with more, you expect more, and I want to do more. And now I realize holy cow, I've helped hundreds of people quit drinking. You know, our friend Molly Smith still credits me, she did the work, but I've helped hundreds of people look in the mirror and make their life better. I've helped people through fitness journeys, I've had you know, and that's what it's all about. And if I can make people give the people the little bit of inspiration, a little bit of motivation, and I do that through my modeling of my life, then I'm then I feel like yep, let's check that box. We did we did what we were we were supposed to do here. And when I get really, really, really quiet, somebody speaks to me and says, This is why I put you through hell because life is not fair, you didn't deserve any of that, but you took it and made the best of it, and I'm telling everybody they can do it too. Yeah, so before this is over, I want to tell this new system that I came out with this calls TLC, but I've been talking forever, so you can go on to the next one and ask me more questions. But don't let me end this without giving my TLC framework that I've just unleashed and right now. I'm gonna give the first speech on it tomorrow. It just downloaded to me. It's amazing how when you get quiet, things just download.

SPEAKER_00 26:33

Yeah. Well, I I just love, you know, like, you know, it's easy for us to mask things in our lives, right? It's easy to mask it. I I think that period, you know, and and Skoka, you got, you know, you've got your time uh, you know, six years ago during the pandemic, you know, you you can mask it or you can unmask it and you can become. And you know, it was a time that people were trying to find themselves, you know, and and the fact that you were alone during that time, you know, was amazing. You know, I live by the beach, so you know, I'm alone, but I I could walk out and I could get the fresh air. Um, you know, I couldn't go on the beach between 11 and 5 because it was shut down, because that's the only time that you know COVID was existing on the beach.

SPEAKER_02 27:23

Yeah, wait, wait. It was so funny here in Michigan, like you could just drive down uh half an hour and go to Ohio. And apparently, right when you crossed the border, COVID didn't exist. Summest thing I've ever heard, but it is what it is.

SPEAKER_00 27:39

Oh man. You know, but I but I applaud, you know, uh you you going through that time because that was uh what you just shared, that was a very growing time. And it's you know, you know, we can reflect, and I and I think it's good to reflect because those are times that you can really dive in to see and discover who you were and where you are, and what what got you to where you are, and and and I love that. I love it.

SPEAKER_02 28:07

But you're so what you're really saying is is and this is something that I've read. I it was uh Dan Sullivan's book, The Gap in the Game. So we always are operating in what in the gap, and and that's just you're like, Well, I'm so far from where I need to be. Like, I want to be the number one podcast host in the country, and that's you know, currently operated by by Joe Rogan. But if I sit there and compare myself to Joe Rogan, of course, I'm gonna be in the gap. But if I look back and say, hey, six years ago, I didn't even have a podcast, right? Uh, look at where I am now. We're top 20, we're getting freaking massive amounts of downloads. Please subscribe to the Heart and Life YouTube channel. That thing's going like crazy. Um, and and here soon as we're about to is I'm gonna be giving out tons and tons and tons of freebies. Uh, I'm big on AI right now, so we're giving out AI prompts, we're giving out how to leverage AI. Um, and so it's just measure the gain and not the gap. And we all pay it's just your mind focuses on the negative. Think about this. I was reading, I'm reading in the book uh body keeps a score right now, and it's like we cannot remember the details of good things, but we can remember almost every detail of the bad things, yeah. And there and you can feel them viscerally. Like I remember my daughter being born, but do I remember what the operating room looked like? Do I remember what it smelled like? But hey, I remember the moment that I said, I'm gonna stop drinking. Remember, I remember how I felt, I remember the tightness in my chest, I remember the hangover that came subsequently, and I remember the sweats and the withdrawals, and see how I just feel it. We're backwards in life, but I think God did that intentionally because that's the that's the uh price of entry, that's the price, that's the cover charge to living a really happy, healthy life. And most won't, but we will, for sure.

SPEAKER_01 30:11

Yeah, yeah, for sure. So good, amazing. Kelly, you seem to be a man of discipline. So I'll give you the clue. Uh just slightly. What would you say you have? What habits or non-negotiables do you have that keep you mentally sharp and maybe discipline as a leader every day? What's what's something that's non-negotiable for you every day? I know the gym is definitely one.

SPEAKER_02 30:36

Yo, I so in my second book, Happier than Life, I did I literally detailed exactly what I do every single day. And and I do the same thing, and I've been doing the same thing for six straight years. Uh, I've gotten a little bit, I didn't push that book as much because from the time I wrote it to the time that I released it, I'm like, hmm, I changed a few things. So there's not much that is negotiable in my life. The only thing that is negotiable right now is that I'm trying to do less because it's the only thing I haven't done in my life was be a human being instead of a human doing. So my day every day looks the same. I I get up at four, I get up at 3:59. On the weekends, sometimes it's it's five, but four and five every single day. And I wake up and I do a gratitude practice. Couple things I'm grateful for, then I go right into a meditation, and then I go and I journal and I head to the gym. So when the first hour of my day, I'm winning. I'm winning as my and I get the tough things out of the way. I you know, I try to stay away from this thing the most. This phone, these are just it's so bad for you. And and right now, in the political climate of what's going on, there's just it's poison, it's toxin. So don't pick up your phone in the first hour, uh, which is hard because every I to get in the gym, I gotta use my phone to listen to my podcast. I gotta listen to the phone. And then by the time you look at it, you got 400 Instagram messages from the night before, a thousand freaking messages from YouTube and text messages from everybody. And it's like, I don't what's becoming non-negotiable is that I I gotta separate from this thing more. Yeah, uh, but the working out, my word, my favorite book is the four agreements. Four agreements I live and die by. So be impeccable with your word. Yeah, it's just certain things that I just once I say it, consider it done, and I won't stop until I get what I came for or something greater. That's so I can knock my mother and my stepfather for all the negativity that they instilled that in there too. So let me give him a little bit of credit. Everything does happen for you. Uh, my stepfather, even when he was a he was a massive drunk, still woke up at four o'clock in the morning and went to work and went to the gym. Where did I learn that from? You know, when he quit drinking, he did it cold turkey, didn't go to AA, didn't do nothing. When I quit drinking, cold turkey just said I've had enough, didn't go to AA, kept going. So there are still good things that came from what my terrible childhood, but I had to feel those feelings a little deeper than I was uh laying on be. So the discipline, uh, discipline is freedom, but the biggest thing what works better than discipline is consistency. So it's better to be consistent than intense. So a lot of people want to, oh, I'm gonna do this big spurt. And I just am this, this is what it looks like for my day. And the the the only non-negotiable I would say, if you don't do anything, put everything in your calendar and work your calendar like it's your lifeblood because it is. And I'm doing this speech tomorrow where people think I'm crazy. Oh, you got to have the freedom to move about your day. Is I I built a prompt that you can put in any AI, and then you drop your calendar in and says, Is this here's my goals? Are these activities going to get me to my goals? And I love AI because it's impartial, it's not your friend going, Oh, you need to work out less, your body needs rest. You know, everybody's different, but AI will tell you like it is. So uh live and die by your schedule. And if you look at my calendar, all of everything is in my schedule, and people know what it is, and it's non-negotiable. And I have no problem anymore saying no. Like when you reached out to me, I had to think for a second like, can I make time first? Because when you say yes to something, you're saying no to something else. And it's not that I don't want to come on and rap with you, it's just I gotta be very careful about my time because I do overextend myself. Today is a long day. My day ends today, started at 4 a.m. and it'll end about 1 a.m. And I'll be in Salt Lake City and I gotta I'll sleep for four hours and I gotta be on a 6 a.m. uh conference call for my cybersecurity company. So I'm learning that as I get 50, I do have limits. I thought I didn't, but that's how I had that panic attack is I went on vacation, I rested recharge, and I went from zero miles an hour to 150 miles an hour for six days straight. And my body went, no more, no mass. Yeah, so the body does keep the score, and I have limits. I used to think I didn't, but I do, and we all do. But you're so you'd be very surprised how much further those limits are than what we think they are, so really push up against them, and the body and God and the universe will will guide you the way.

SPEAKER_00 35:51

That's right, sure, that's right. So, what do you think from harder than life to happier than life? You know, two different things, right? But in between, there, like there's there's some growing pains, there's some learning, but really when you look at what's harder than life, what is it within us that's harder than life? But when you think about happier than life, like I think a lot of people are missing being happy, yeah. A lot of people, you know, just just the mindset. I and I was just talking with a flight attendant the other day who I just recently connected with, and I got to thinking about processing of like people that get on an airplane. Who sets the tone on a flight than the first person that you meet when you enter that plane? Yeah, that flight attendant that's standing right there is greeting everybody. And if that greeter is not happier than life, right, is not happy and welcoming and really setting the tone because there's 250 people that get on that plane that have all different types of personalities that went through all different kinds of things, right? But that person right there can really change somebody's attitude in just a moment.

SPEAKER_02 37:20

And so who's who's the greeter in your who's the greeter in your life? It's you. So in the morning, the first thing you do is that flight attendant. So what do we do? You grab your phone and you start looking at notifications, and you're immediately on the defensive. So, what do I do? I immediately go to gratitude. So I I get that happy greeter coming in. So that's a great analogy. But the funniest thing you're talking about is happy and life, healthier than life, or the last book, the next book's gonna be called healthier than life, and where I'm gonna blend the two because I'm I'm three different people. I was scared to death, completely not knowing what I was doing when I wrote Harder Than Life. Excuse me, Harder Than Life is just about looking in the mirror and being disciplined. And I built this tough, like everything's gotta be hard, and I'm gonna plow through it, and that works until it doesn't. That's right. So then I I started softening from all of the therapy, and I was like, okay, I'm gonna write uh happier than life. Here's the habits I do to be happy, and then what I didn't put in there is what does happiness mean to you? You know, it's and and it started with just I gave a speech in honor of America for the 250th anniversary of being free, and I I I kept talking about you know, we we have all have these inalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. The pursuit, and it got me thinking that really it's it's a pursuit, that's the journey we're talking about of living because so many of us are working and and living, but we're not alive, yeah. So it's a pursuit of living, the pursuit of freedom, not just freedom to move about the world, but freedom in your mind. And when I got to thinking about that, it got me wondering like what beyond our basic human needs makes you happy, and it's really simple, it's literally just being focused on right here, right now, being present. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, all we have is today, and it's a gift, so that's why they call it present. And and it's just that simple. It's simple, but not easy because in when I'm sitting here talking, I'm thinking about okay, I got a meeting right after this, I gotta get on a pack, I gotta get on a plane, I gotta rehearse my speech, which I was doing before. I got it, got it, got it. I'm in the future. Yeah, but I just want to be right here, right now, with my two favorite people and all that matter, right here, right now. And and that's what I'm gonna talk about in happier or in the healthier than life. How to cultivate those. And and that this is a great segue to two things. There, there's the three S's silence, solitude, and stillness. Those three things you'll you can answer any question you have. And then once you do that, give yourself a little TLC. And it's simple training, train your mind and your body every single day. You train your your and this isn't the feel good, do your 10,000 steps. Get your butt in the gym and sweat. Now it can be Pilates, it could be and again I don't want to hear this, I don't have time. Get up earlier, and I don't want to hear I can't afford it. There's$10 gyms. Get to the gym and sweat, and then feed your mind, train your mind with a podcast or uh yeah, well, just podcasts, but also listen to other podcasts, people that you might not agree with. So that's the T. The L is learn. You learn by reading, read 10 pages or a chapter a day, a day of a nonfiction book, and then take in podcast. A podcast, instead of listening to the music while you're on your way to work or at the gym, turn on a podcast, train your mind and body, learn by reading and taking in good podcasts, and then finally, see is counseling or and coaching. I have both. Um, so I have a coach that holds me accountable, and a counselor who's a therapist who points out my blind spots together, they're molding me into the next level of what I gotta be. TLC, guys, is that can be done by anybody, and there's no excuse. And if you start with excuses, there's the issue right there. No excuses, and that's non-negotiable. I do that every day, all day. Um, and it's simple TLC. Who doesn't want some TLC?

SPEAKER_00 42:04

That's awesome. Great, love that. Oh, it's good stuff right there with Kelly Siegel.

SPEAKER_02 42:12

Remember too, remember, guys. I don't think I've ever said this to you, Russ. You know, everybody thinks you only live once, but no, no, no. We only die once. You live every day. So whatever hell happened yesterday, let it go. Let it go. Live in daytight compartments and enjoy it because we don't know what the hell is going to happen tomorrow.

SPEAKER_01 42:30

That's right. Very true. No guarantees. That's right. Kelly, we have this uh saying or this quote that we close out every single podcast with that we usually like to ask our guests about, and that quote goes, Wellness is not about perfection, it's about progress. What would you say that quote means to you?

SPEAKER_02 42:48

Well, I say it all the time: progress over perfection, which is so hard for people. I it amazes me. Like when I'm in my IT cybersecurity firm, everybody wants to make me so happy that they're striving for perfection. And I'm like, guys, perfection is the horizon, we're never gonna get there. So let's aim for perfection, but but stay land on excellence. And you can get to excellence, excellence is achievable, and it's looking in the mirror, being proud of the effort that you gave, and it's simply by measuring the right inputs to get the right outputs for the right outcomes. We're all so busy being busy that we're not measuring, did we actually achieve the goal? And I don't care how hard you work. This, if you don't achieve your goal, you don't get a freaking participation trophy in life. It's not the way the real world works. So you can work your heart butt off, miss fire totally, and have to start over. And that's pretty much what I do over and over and over again. So I heard this once it was I have to master's degree in falling down and a PhD in getting back up. That's what that means.

SPEAKER_00 44:00

Yeah. Yeah. That's awesome. Love it, man. Yeah, I I I love um, you know, Kelly you know the enlightenment that you brought today. And I I think um, you know, there's there's numerous things that I personally can take away. And I I I do a walk and talk every Wednesday um with Kate on the East Coast, and we just get on and we talk about something about you know health and wellness, you know, and last week in it, we we talked about today, and we talked about what is it in our victories that we should celebrate every single day. And gratitude was something that I shared with everybody that that we need to start the day with. And you know, for me, you've said a number of of key things, but it really it really solidified in me, and I and I hope people were listening today, and people are gonna pull different things out of today's uh talk on Dual Coast, but you you really reaffirmed you know the gratitude in starting that because that really sets the tone of our day. And I usually do the gratitude on a walk. Yeah, um, you know, I get up and I I walk, I smell the ocean air, I'm breathing, you know, the goodness in of the salt um and hearing the crashing of the waves, but starting the day with gratitude to me is solid in how we should go about our day and really setting the tone.

SPEAKER_02 45:22

You know, a lot of people talk about gratitude. It's it's impossible to be grateful and grumpy at the same time. You can't feel two emotions, so feel grateful. But I I want to go back to what you just said because a lot of higher achievers like us forget to celebrate wins at all. And I got a news flash for you. Waking up is a win.

SPEAKER_00 45:41

That's right.

SPEAKER_02 45:42

A lot of people didn't wake up this morning. So I have a bad habit. I just bought a company and we integrated them, and I celebrated for exactly 30 seconds. And and we okay, okay, uh acquisition's complete. Let's take a second to be like cool, and that's what it did. I have a and and and then there's a lot of people like me. So, what I would say to you is celebrate all wins because I just forget about it, and and and it's not healthy. Oh, it's a win to be on the podcast, it's a win to wake up on the day, it's a win to go on your gratitude walk. It's funny you talk about that, excuse me. Is I went I usually take a gratitude walk with my dog, and here in Michigan, it's been so cold that he's a princess and he won't walk in the snow. However, in Florida, I've been I get I land in Florida and I'm so busy I haven't like I'll go on the walk and I'm thinking about what I gotta do. So when you're going on a walk, put your phone down, leave it at the house, and go and be grateful and just think about what you're doing. I did it yesterday with the dog, and I'm like, oh, I've missed this. And it just it sometimes just you forget about it. You know, that's why I keep hammering the TLC. Somewhere in there, I gotta put you know, take gratitude walks because they are they're very they're vital. I feel like I recharge and you look around and you see the greenery, and you just see how awesome this this earth is, and bonus points for you know the grounding. If you can walk barefooted, especially on the beach, do it. If you can do it in the grass, do it. There's something energetic about that that really sets you. It grounds you and just sets you straight.

SPEAKER_00 47:29

Yeah, agree. Absolutely. Been amazing today. That is amazing.

SPEAKER_02 47:33

Thanks, guys. Thank you. I really appreciate it. It's been fun.

SPEAKER_01 47:36

That was yeah, awesome. I loved every single second day. That's that was great. Kelly, with where can people find you, Kelly?

SPEAKER_02 47:44

Well, we hang out a lot on uh Instagram, Kelly.segal.71. That's growing, but we're really pushing the uh YouTube. Uh here shortly, we're when we get to a certain number, we're gonna start releasing a lot of special things on just YouTube. Um, but you can always email me. Uh, I answer all of my emails. It's Kelly at hardanlife.com until I can't. Um, but it's to give it forward, man. And a lot of times in the early years, people came to me, how do I quit drinking? Now it's pretty much well, how do I win more? And I just teach them about the mindset. So it the the greatest thing I love doing are relationships. Um people laugh at me. I'm really good at love advice because that's what the Harder Than Life movement actually started. I got my heart broken, and I looked in the mirror and said, I'm the common denominator, I'm the one attracting these women. So, really, the heart than life movement is a love story. And I'm flying out to Utah to give a speech at my uh girlfriend's company uh two years now. And like I said, I I this is what I prayed for uh a reciprocal, loving, kind, giving relationship, which I watched this week. The last two weeks where I've had been in nothing but anxiety, she's like, I'm here for you, babe. I love you, and I've never had that. It feels foreign to have somebody unconditionally love and support you, even when you're down, because love to me was earned, and it's not the way it's supposed to be. So, whether it be relationship advice, whether it be business advice, fitness advice, uh, we work on it all because it all starts right here. That's right.

SPEAKER_00 49:23

That's right. Well, thank you coming on for coming on to Zool Coast this morning, Kelly. And real so appreciate it. Uh, appreciate your energy, appreciate your attitude, your passion, everything that you bring to the table. You know, you you've gone from newspaper boy to highly successful CEO. You're giving, you're giving, you're giving. And the fact that you know, harder than life and happier than life and soon to be healthier life. I it just it just uh it encourages me, right? In my in my walk today about being present, being here, and thank you for enlightening my life this morning. I really appreciate it. 100%.

SPEAKER_02 50:02

Yeah, Russ, I'm proud of you, man. I, you know, first time I met you to now, your growth is you know, take a moment today to to think about when you started and where you're at now. You've done a lot of great things, and and I'm proud of you, and I'm happy for you. And you and I believe even at uh our our age, which there's still a lot of life to live, especially with AI, we're going to live a lot longer. Uh, I feel like you're just getting started. So guys, keep doing what you're doing. And uh, I challenge you to take it up a notch. What what's what's holding you back? Go.

SPEAKER_00 50:32

Yeah, it's awesome. Thank you.

SPEAKER_02 50:34

Thanks, boys.

SPEAKER_01 50:35

Grateful for you. Yeah, really appreciate it, guys. Please check Kelly out on all his social media and his YouTube handle. Check us out at Dual Coast Podcast on all social media handles. See you guys next week. Thank you so much for listening. Kelly, thank you again for us. Thanks, Kelly.