Episode 53: What Is a Launch Anyway? Learning to Pause in a Fast World

The loudest voices say move faster, buy sooner, decide now. We chose a different path. This launch explores how a quiet pause can protect your time, money, and energy, and why sustainable change starts with one small, honest step you can actually keep.

We open up about renaming the show to Delay the Binge and reaffirm the Plus One Theory at its core: you don’t need the whole staircase, only the next right step. From the irony of preaching slowness on short-form platforms to the reality that tired people don’t pause, we map the gap between urgency and discernment. You’ll hear how “paid recognition” dressed as flattery nearly slipped through, why pressure isn’t empowerment, and how a simple boundary script can defuse high-pressure pitches without burning bridges.

We also get candid about investing in great services at the wrong time. Excitement isn’t a strategy; timing and structure are. With practical tools like a paper-and-pencil year review, we show how to extract lessons without shame: list what you tried, what worked, what drained you, then circle one next step. Delay the binge isn’t just about food. It’s about pausing before any pattern that pulls you away from yourself, overworking, overspending, overreacting, overpleasing, and the quiet depletion that hides under a polished life.

Expect reflective solos, “me too” stories from real people, and grounded insights from experts in habits, trauma, and health, without pedestals. If you’re ready to replace urgency with clarity and momentum with integrity, this space will help you build a life that doesn’t rush you. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs a breath, and leave a review to help others find their next steady step.

This is Delay the Binge™, formerly The Plus One Theory Podcast

Delay the Binge™ is a trademark of TPKK Concepts LLC.
© 2025 Pam Dwyer. All rights reserved.
Learn more: DelayTheBinge.com

Storytelling that transforms. Healing that lasts.
From bestselling author Pam Dwyer (PJ Hamilton).
Books + speaking: PamDwyer.com

Chapters

• 0:00 New Name, Same Core Message
• 0:52 Choosing The Long Game Over Hype
• 2:03 The Irony Of Slowing Down Fast
• 3:03 Not Advice, Just Reflection
• 3:43 When Caring Turns Into Urgency
• 4:29 Install A Human Firewall
• 5:07 The Paid Recognition Trap
• 6:10 Pressure Isn’t Empowerment
• 6:45 A Script For Saying No
• 7:27 Plus One Theory In Practice
• 8:16 Great Service, Wrong Timing
• 9:14 Your Message Will Evolve
• 9:56 Paper, Pencil, And Clarity
• 10:32 What Delay The Binge Means
• 11:18 Guests, Experts, And Community
• 11:50 Join Us And Go Slower

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:01

Welcome to the very first episode of the Delay the Bench podcast. And yes, we are still the plus one theory, but we changed the name because it fit the concept a little bit more. And we still apply the plus one theory to every bit of the delay the binge concept. And yes, I guess we can call this a launch. Which already makes me laugh a little. Because before I hit record today, I sat here asking myself, what is a launch, anyways? Is it fireworks, a countdown clock, a dozen emails telling you don't miss out? Because that kind of launch absolutely fits certain marketing and branding efforts. There is a time and a place for momentum, urgency, and excitement, and I'm not knocking that at all. But delay the binge was never meant to be built on urgency. It was meant to be built on the long game. This is slower, quieter, more honest. And honestly, that's kind of hilarious in a fast paced world, right? We're living in a time where you are supposed to explain something meaningful in a 30 second video, or better yet, under a minute, because apparently that's long. And you've got what, two or three seconds to grab someone's attention? Jeesh. Jeesh No. Well, that's not even enough time to say, Hi, how are ya? But those are the facts. And if I want to help the masses, if I want this message to reach people where they actually are, then yeah, I have to play the game a little. Which means trying to say something meaningful in seconds. So you understand the importance of slowing down. When you really think about that, pff, that irony alone tells me how badly we need the pause. And honestly, this is how I know I'm being called to share this message of the plus one theory and delay the binge. Because apparently I love a challenge. Trying to invite people to slow down, pause, and reflect in a culture that rewards speed, reaction, and constant output, well, that's not very easy. But something in me lights up at that, the challenge. Not because it's easy. And it does matter. I've always believed that small intentional shifts change everything. One pause, one better choice, one moment where you don't react automatically. So if the challenge is learning how to say something meaningful in seconds, just long enough to remind you to stop for a moment, then yes, that feels like exactly the work I'm meant to be doing. Before I go any further, I want to set the tone for this episode. This is not advice. This is not instruction. This is not me telling you what you should do. This is reflection. I'm looking back at my own year 2025, and honestly, it's been a little imperfect and sharing what I noticed, in case it gives you space to pause and reflect on yours too. Because 2025 taught me some things, some gently, some loudly, and some let's just say with a price tag. Last year was a big creative year for me. Writing, speaking, building, trying to get a message out into the world that actually helps people. And when you care deeply like that, everything starts to feel urgent. Every email feels important, every DM feels personal, every opportunity feels like, okay, this might be the one to get it out there. I wasn't reckless, I was hopeful. And hope has a way of leaning you forward, sometimes a little too far. Urgency doesn't come from greed, it comes from caring. But urgency also overrides discernment. Here's something that really clicked for me. When your computer senses something sketchy, it doesn't shame you. It doesn't say, wow, you should know better. It pauses, it blocks it, and it creates space. Meanwhile, when we feel overwhelmed or behind or excited, we're like, click, yes, take my money. No pause, no firewall, no hmm, every decision I regretted last year skipped the pause. And it's not because I didn't know any better. That's because I was tired. And tired people don't pause. They react. Let's talk about the award email emails, shall we? You know the one. You've been nominated or you've been selected, and we were so impressed. The limited opportunity. At first I felt flattered. Like wow, they picked me out of all these gazillions of other messages. But then I felt uneasy. Because it was too easy. And then I got curious. And when I finally paused, one thought landed. Paying for recognition doesn't feel right to me. Yes, they wanted me to pay them to be nominated. So that pause didn't embarrass me. It protected me. Recognition that requires payment isn't recognition, it's marketing. Marketing is not bad, but urgency plus flattery, that's a powerful combination. Let's see, and then there were the big promises, the polished systems, the confident voices that said, I can shortcut this for you type of energy, you know. And listen, I believe in investing in yourself. But here's what I noticed anything that makes you feel smaller without it is an empowerment. It's pressure. Pressure convinces you that delay equals failure. And most things in life, they're not now or never. One of the most freeing skills I learned wasn't spotting better offers. It was learning how to respond without betraying myself. Here's the sentence I use now. Wow, thank you for reaching out. Your services look valuable and amazing, but they aren't in my budget right now. I'm glad to connect and will reach out if the timing is right. No apology, no explanations, no emotional gymnastics. Just clarity. And the relief was immediate. What all of this taught me is that I didn't need to stop believing in my message. I needed to stop leaping. That's where the plus one theory comes in. I don't need the whole staircase. I just need the next step. Winging it feels productive, but it's exhausting. Structure doesn't limit creativity. It calms the nervous system. The plus one question is simple. What's the next right step I can actually sustain? You know, one of the most humbling lessons I learned came from investing in something truly excellent before I was ready to use it. Top notch branding, y'all. I mean, a large media agency in New York. They know so much and they were so helpful, and they really believed in my message, and I think they still do. It was professional work, and they offered to support me even without a budget. They were great people. And yet, I had no plan to execute it. The problem wasn't the service, the problem was timing. Excitement isn't a strategy. If you don't know what happens after you buy something, that's information, not failure. Here's something I wish someone had told me earlier. When you're building your message when you're building, your message is still becoming. Of course it changes. Of course it morphs. And of course, what fit six months ago doesn't fit now. That doesn't mean you messed up. Sometimes the service wasn't wrong, it was just too early. So don't get ahead of yourself. You need to pause, breathe, step outside the noise. What grounded me most was stepping out of my head and onto paper. Yes, paper and pencil. I wrote twenty twenty five at the top of the page and then I listed what I tried, what worked, what drained me, not to judge, just to notice. And then I circled one small step forward, and that was enough. Since this is message. Since this is the official launch episode, I want to tell you what this space is going to be like. Delay the binge isn't just about food. It's about pausing before any pattern that pulls you away from yourself. Overworking, over giving, overspending, overreacting, over pleasing, that's my big one. And especially quiet depletion. The kind where nothing looks wrong from the outside, but inside you're running on fumes. Some episodes will be just me reflecting, sharing stories, offering ways to build a pause without making it a whole production. And we'll have guests, real people in the middle of it, not fixed, not perfect. Because sometimes hearing someone else say me too is what helps you pause. We'll also have experts, people who understand habits, patterns, trauma, health, but not from a pedestal. We learn together here. If you're listening and thinking, wow, this sounds familiar, I want you to know that you're not alone. If you're struggling and feel will struggling and feel willing to share your story, we'd love to hear from you. If you want to listen to guests and relate, you're welcome here. If you want ongoing support, reflection prompts, and practical tools to help you pause before patterns take over, join my email list at delaythebinge.com. That's where I share the good stuff. Encouragement, tools, and reminders that you don't have to rush your healing or your growth. This isn't about fixing yourself. It's about staying long enough to understand yourself. Thank you for being here, and thank you for pausing with me. We're learning together. One powerful pause at a time. Talk to you next week.